Chapter The Third
Chapter The Third, or "In Which I am Beat Up By Those Cute Little Ponies"
I run after Fluttershy, hoping to find the terrified girl and help her. In hindsight, running after her bellowing her name probably scared her even more, but imagine what I was feeling! I just found out I have neighbors from another dimension! The Feds will tear them up, or probe them, or do all kinds of ungodly shit to them if they find out! I have to help them out of this mess!
I find myself at a hallway intersection, and Fluttershy’s nowhere to be found. “Where is she?” I mutter to myself as I scan the hallways. “She’s gotta be here some—“
Suddenly, I feel the strong impact of wood hitting my head. The world starts spinning, and I begin to lose feeling in my legs. Another hard strike is enough to take me out, and the world fades to black.
“Hey buddy. Wake up.”
“Oh dear. Did we hit him too hard?”
“Don’t worry about it, 'Shy. I got this under control.”
“Last time you said that, we were stuck in a box for five months.”
“Shut up, Dash! Is it my fault that Blueblood’s, I dunno, A GOD?!”
“To be fair, you kind of tipped him off…”
“Spitfire, so help me, if you don’t shut up; I will eat you.”
“Just saying…”
“So, what do we do now? Do we just keep him here?”
“Nah, we’ve got to interrogate him. Scoots! Get the bucket!”
“Why do I have to get the bucket?! You get the bucket! You knocked him out!”
“Because it’s past your bedtime, young lady. It’s either you help us or you go to bed.”
“What’s this I hear? Gilda Griffin being motherly? I thought griffins ate their young!”
“First off: that’s racist. Secondly, I’m not being motherly; I’m telling her the facts. Thirdly, if you don’t shut the hell up; I’m going to eat you!”
“Someone’s a bit sensitive…”
“Whatever, Soarin’. Just get the bucket kid!”
“Fine…”
My eyes open to find five blurs in front of me. Each of them seem to be conversing with each other, which seems weird to me until I realized that I don’t have my glasses. Now, I know that this is going to sound stupid (I'm just recovering from a concussion), but I think it is a good idea to ask them for help.
“Hey guys?” I call groggily. “A little help here? I can’t see!”
The five blobs all turn to me. “Oh shit,” the white topped one sighs. “Scoots! Forget about the bucket! He’s awake!”
“Oh, COME ON!!!” cries a young voice from outside of my field of vision.
The pink blob gently pushes on my cracked lenses; revealing herself to be Fluttershy. I look at the others to find a girl with short rainbow hair, a guy with a blue up-do, another girl with a bright orange and yellow hairdo, and an irate girl with snow white hair.
“Fluttershy…” groaned the white-haired girl. “Now he’s gonna be able to recognize us!”
“Oh, was that not part of the plan? I’m sorry.” She leans over to my face with apologetic smile. “Would you mind too much if I kind of made you blind against your will again?”
I just deadpan. “'Shy, don’t you think it’s enough that you knocked me out?”
She gasps in horror. “They knocked you out?!” She turns to the rest of the group. “I thought you said you found him passed out on the floor!”
“Well what were we SUPPOSED to do, 'Shy?” retorts the rainbow girl. “This guy was chasing you around the hall, hollering your name like a madman!”
A little girl shows up. “Um, guys? Shouldn’t we interrogate him while we have him tied up?”
I look down to find that I am duct-taped to a kitchen chair, and that I'm stripped down to my boxers.
“Whoa! Not cool guys!” I yell in surprise.
Fluttershy winces a little. “I’m sorry!” she cries. “It was their idea! I’m so sorry!”
“What are you sorry for?!” demands the white-haired girl. “He was the one chasing you like some kind of crazy!”
“You know, if you wanted to make this easier, you could just—“
I'm cut short when the white-haired girl slaps me hard across the face. “Who are you?!” she hollers.
“Oh, his name is Sebastian.” Fluttershy says timidly before deflating under the white-haired girl’s glare. “I’m sorry.”
She just sighs. “Never mind. Just… just tell us who you’re working for!”
I give them a quizzical look. “What?”
The little girl, in turn, bitch-slaps me. “WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR?!?” she screams.
“Scootaloo!” cries the flame-haired girl.
“What?” the girl asks, turning to her friends. “It’s fun!”
“Not for me, it isn’t.” I mutter.
This time, the rainbow-haired girl slaps me across the face. “SHUT UP!!!” she bellows. A smile creeps onto her face. “Hey, this IS fun!”
The flame-haired girl sighs and facepalms. “Guys, we need to do this diplomatically. We can’t just go around slapping people! Soarin’, back me up on this!”
“I dunno, sis…” the blue-haired guy grins. “This does look like fun.”
“Guys, let’s just focus on the interrogation,” groans the white-haired girl. Turning to me, she scowls. “Are you working for Blueblood?!”
Again, I just look questioningly to my aggressors. “What?!”
Rainbow-hair slaps me again. “What country you from?” she demands.
“What?!” I babble in confusion.
“I never heard of a country named ‘What’! They speak Equestrian in ‘What’?”
I just look at them, totally confused. “W-what?!”
She just flips over a nearby table. “EQUESTRIAN, MOTHERFUCKER, DO YOU SPEAK IT?!?!?”
“W-w-what?!”
This time, white-hair punches me in the gut. “SAY WHAT AGAIN!” she demands. “I DARE YOU! I DOUBLE DARE YOU, MOTHERFUCKER!!!”
“Uh, guys? You’re kind of scaring Fluttershy,” observes Soarin’.
All three of us turn to see Fluttershy crying with the flame-haired girl consoling her. Flame-head give both of the girls a dirty look. “Just get this over with.”
White-hair nods grimly and turns to me again. “Look, punk, I don’t know who you are, but we could make things a lot easier if you just answer this one question: how do you know so much about Fluttershy’s past?”
I look up to her, trying to calm myself down. “I know about your past too, all of your pasts. You’re Gilda, and you were a griffin before you were human. You,” I say, turning to the rainbow-haired girl, “are Rainbow Dash, Element of Loyalty, and you were a pegasus. The other girl is Spitfire, another pegasus and as well as a Wonderbolt, and the guy next to her is Soarin', another Wonderbolt and pegasus. The little girl is Scootaloo, and was pegasus filly before she came here. What I want to know is just what the hell you guys are doing here?”
Everyone is silent for a while, all dumbfounded by what I said. Suddenly, Gilda punches me in the face. “He’s a spy!” she declares. “I TOLD you guys this would happen!”
Spitfire tries to calm her down. “Look, Gilda, we don’t know for sure if he’s a spy. For all we know he could be on our side! Let’s wait for the Princesses to check this out!”
“Yeah, Gilda,” agrees Soarin’. “Maybe the Doctor sent him!”
My eyes widen. “The Doctor!” I grin, despite my current position. “He’s here? Is he with Derpy?”
Gilda gives the two of them a venomous glare. “Great!” she groans. “He knows about the Doctor! Now he has something to report to his boss!”
Rainbow Dash gives me a wary stare. “I dunno, Gilda. This guy sounds like a friendly… Maybe we should—“
“HE’S SUPPOSED TO SOUND LIKE A FRIENDLY!!” she roars. “HE’S A SPY!!” She places her hand on my scalp. “Look, punk,” she hisses, “I know how you spy types work. I used to work with you guys, and trust me; I know every trick in your book. You guys think you’re so clever, and that you can act your way out of anything! Not today, punk. Now, you’re gonna tell me and my friends what we want to know about your boss or things will get… uncomfortable.”
As she says the word “uncomfortable”, I feel five sharp points dig into my scalp. “WHAT THE HELL!?!” I yelp.
“Gilda!” cries Spitfire. “Let’s go to the Princesses! They’ll know what to do!”
“Yeah, Gilda!” agrees Rainbow Dash, alarmed. “No need for things to get messy!”
She gives them all a savage roar. “THEY COULDN’T SAVE US FROM THAT MONSTER!! THEY CAN’T SAVE US NOW!! IT’S TIME TO FACE THINGS OURSELVES!!”
“GILDA!” comes a cry from the back. We all turn to see Fluttershy, no longer crying, but standing up, ready to defend me. “Please, Gilda,” she pleads. “Let’s just see what the Princesses say.”
Gilda scowls, but lets me go. “Just because it's you, 'Shy.” she growls. “For anyone else, this guy would be sushi.” She pushes me roughly in my seat. “Say thank you, punk.”
I look up to my savior. “Th-thanks, 'Shy.”
She smiles warmly at me. “There, there... We just made a mistake! No need to thank me. Let’s just get you out of these…”
Everyone but Gilda pitched in unwrapping me from the seat. When I was free, Soarin’ offered me a hand to help me out of my chair. “Sorry about that,” he grins sheepishly, “got a little carried away there.”
I sigh and take his hand. “No problem. I’m used to this kind of thing.” Looking around the room and rubbing my arms, I notice that everyone’s just looking awkwardly at me. “So… what now?”
Spitfire speaks up. “Now, we go to the Princesses.”
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I liked the "English, motherfucker, do you speak it?" part
can't wait for the next chapter
Yes good story. LETS HAVE ANOTHER ONE REAL SOON!!!
938912>>938886
I'll try for weekly posts. However, if the site has the same problem it had yesterday...
Not gonna lie, this is really freaking epic
Me like
Consider this tracked.
If that was me as soon as i got up i would have grabed the nearest object and used it to bash some skulls in even though they are ponies
My only reaction:
I liked all the references put in there, it was hilarious!
THE WAIT IS TO LONG!!!!!!!
947666 It's only been 3 days...
Yeah, it strikes me that the adrenaline-junkie fliers would be the ones to jump straight to "enhanced interrogation" without trying other methods first.
nice pulp fiction reference