Fast Times at Stinky Sugar

by PresentPerfect

The Best Joke I Will Ever Write

The Best Joke I Will Ever Write
by Present Perfect

Unleash the magic! Unleash the magic! If we lose, then you're to blame!

The Shadowbolts' song echoed in Twilight's head as she agonized over what to do.

So far, her containment spectrometer had caused nothing but trouble. Every time it drained one of the Canterlot High students of their "magic", the aftereffects grew even stronger and more dangerous. First simple portals appeared. Then Spike began talking. Most recently, those horrible, man-eating plants had attacked everyone and nearly ruined the Tri-Cross. And now she had even more magic, thanks to that rainbow-haired girl.

Was it worth it? Could she possibly risk releasing that kind of power? What could be worse than a motocross course full of dangerous vines?

But her academic future was at stake. There was nothing, nothing at all she cared about more. Even the social pressure of expectations was a drop in the bucket of her fear over what might happen should she betray Principal Cinch.

In the end, her course was clear. She grasped the amulet firmly in both hands, held it aloft, turned her head away, and wrenched it open.

"Wunderbar!" shouted an excited voice in a thick accent.

The next thing Twilight knew, she was plunged into her own personal hell of lightning bolts shooting directly into her eyes. The Shadowbolts behind her screamed in pain and confusion.

"Oh, jes, jeees! You vere made for ze camera! Ze film, she luffs you!"

After what felt like an eternity, the flashing stopped. Twilight blinked, barely able to make out a blue face and large pink shades beyond the afterimages. The amulet lay in her hand, its power drained.

"I, Photo Finish, have captured... da magics!"

Twilight wiped her eyes. The blue-skinned girl, Photo Finish, stood before her in a dramatic pose. Behind her, the Shadowbolts and Principal Cinch growled and stalked toward Photo Finish with fire in their eyes.

"I go!"

And with that exclamation, Photo Finish, savior of the multiverse, fled, the Shadowbolts hot on her tail.

Author's Note:

I couldn't believe this when it came to me. I credit my watching back through season one. But seriously, how has no one done this yet?

Comments

[PresentPerfect]

6628939

[MrAskAPirate]

i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/714/353/123.png

[FanOfMostEverything]

I feel deeply ashamed for not thinking of this. Deeply, deeply ashamed.

[HB_DS2013]

That was outta left field!

[PresentPerfect]

6633213
Welcome to the...

I don't think "herd" is the right word in this case. :B

[ShadowLDrago]

"I, Photo Finish, have captured... da magics!"

I, I got nothing. You win.

[keaton-furman-prower]

You.

You win.

Everything.

Take everything I own. It is all yours.

[TrackingTarget]

This is easily the best chapter of this. Probably the best chapter of anything on this website, really.

[Larger Seagull]

"I, Photo Finish, have captured... da magics!"

*Raises finger to object but then puts finger down*
Take all my money. You can make much better use of it.

[The0neUMisunderstood]

Oh. Ok then...

You win the internet.

[ArtieStroke]

I had totally forgot the punchline of this chapter and decided to re-read it- even going into this a second time, this is the best god damn joke I've seen in this fandom.

[PresentPerfect]

7491019
And it's so obvious, too! It's like, how is this not a fandom-wide thing at this point? I'm not that original!

[621Chopsuey]

You magnificent bastard.

[MythrilMoth]