• Published 16th Oct 2015
  • 3,632 Views, 45 Comments

My Little Wub Maker - Loxart

A human trapped in Equestria who happens to have a DJ as his Marefriend.

  • ...

No one disses the wubz!

Hello, my name is Anon, and I am super lucky to have the local DJ as my marefriend. The only problem is that she is a pony. In fact, most intelligent creatures here in Equestria are ponies, except for me. You see, I came here a long time ago while exploring some ancient ruins on earth. It was sort of my hobby to go on adventures and this was one I was waiting on for a long time. As I was exploring, I had happened to stumble upon a journal of some sorts. It told a story about the writers time in another world where he saw the most wonderful of things. The only problem is that it was in shreds and unfinished. He must have been attacked and didn't make it back. As I looked around, I saw a door leading down into some sort of underground pool. I decided to take a swim and see how the water felt. When I jumped in, I got pulled down deeper and deeper. When I finally resurfaced, I noticed that this wasn't where I came from. I tried swimming back down but I only hit the bottom of the lake I had come up in. When I came back up, there was a horse with a horn and wings looking at me confused. This was the princess. You know the rest of the story.

The reason I am writing this is because I finally have learned how important it is to document your life because you don't know how quickly it can be taken away from you. I learned that after today, the day which Vinyl had a dentists appointment and ended up hunting me down and probably trying to kill me. I finally got her calmed down afterwards but there was one problem... I pissed her off again later during the day, specifically, after the appointment.

So, reader, can I ask you something? Have you ever said something, realized exactly what you said and knew that you screwed up and constantly apologized? Because I made that same mistake today. The only difference between what I asked and what I did was the fact I didn't get to apologize before I was yet again chased down by a raging Vinyl Scratch. Do I regret what I said? Absolutely! But does that make up for what the heck I said? Nope! Let me tell you what the heck happened between me and the most awesome, amazing, super co-

"Vinyl, do I have to write all that?" I ask, nervous.

"Don't make me angry again Anon!" Vinyl says, glaring daggers at me.

"Ok!" My voice cracks.

Let me tell you what the heck happened between me and the most awesome, amazing, super cool... and hot-headed... DJ ever.

We started to walk out the once sealed door in the dentists office and headed for the exit. I waved off Colgate and she asked Vinyl if she would see her in 3 months, which to that, Vinyl turned and positioned herself facing away from a potted plant. She proceeded to kick it over and walked out with her head up high and humming a victory tune. I walked over to the counter where Colgate was currently doing some paperwork and placed enough bits to replace the plant Vinyl broke. She smiled and nodded, accepting the bits and waving me off as I left. I walked down the stairs, knowing that Vinyl was already down there, waiting for me to take her to eat like I promised her. As I approached the bottom of the stairs, I saw her whimpering at the door like a dog. I simply rolled my eyes and walked out with her.

As we headed for the nearest Hay-Burger, she kept poking at me to bug me and it worked. As I glared down at her, she lit up her horn and shot a beam at my face. A bright light flashed and when it faded, I wondered what the heck she just did. I tried to ask her but quickly found out when I tried... she had sealed my mouth shut so I wouldn't try and bug her while she was eating. I just growled through my closed mouth as she began to hum again. I may love this Mare, but sometimes, she can be sooooo enraging! As we kept walking towards the Hay-Burger, the ponies around town either chuckled at me or praised vinyl about what happened with my mouth. I simply rolled my eyes and walked faster, avoiding all the laughing.

By the time we got to the Hay-Burger, Vinyl had charged in and had gotten in line, bouncing slightly with a grin on her face. As I go to join her, she looks me in the eyes with a mischievous grin across her face. I raised an eyebrow but she just giggled and I shrugged it off. When we got to the front of the line, she immediately started to order. What she had asked for was 3 Hay-Burgers, 2 Garden Salads, 2 Large Fries and a Large Soda. I tried to protest but I couldn't due to my mouth currently being magically sealed by one Magical DJ whiny baby!

I guess she had planned this all out from the start when I said I would treat her to a meal. This always seems to happen when I offer to do something nice for her. Vinyl is already 2 steps ahead when I offer to buy her something or show her a magazine or basically anything that involves me spending bits for her pleasure. I could never understand how she could be so devious and so annoying yet still has the power to allure me into loving her.

As we sat down, she finally decided to unseal my mouth so I could talk again. But before I could, she held a hoof up and ate one of her burgers first, making sure to barely chew and gulp in down quickly. She let out a large belch and giggled a bit. As she looked back at me, I was glaring her down in anger and a little amazement for what she just accomplished. She tilted her head and gave me a puzzled look to which I just shook my head and tried my best to smile.

"You know Vinyl" I start, "you really are stubborn."

"You're JUST noticing this?" She emphasizes with sarcasm, "WOW, you are oblivious!"

That made me chuckle a bit before I thought of something.

"Hey, wanna play a game?" I ask.

"Depends. What game we talking?" She asks, giving me her full attention.

"Predator and Prey. Basically hunt the other like a wolf does a sheep." I say, smiling.

"HAH! You know I would never hunt and hurt you!" She says, smiling.

"I'll just have to get you angry then. But not to angry." I said, starting to give her a sly look.

"Try me!"

"Lets see. Your mane is weird." I start.

"Heard it."

"You are immature."

"So are you!"

"Dubstep is horrible."


As soon as I realized what was said to this Mare, I instantly regretted being born. I just told off dubstep to the master of it in this world. I knew that this was a step to far. I looked her in the eye to see pure hate and rage behind those red beauties. As much as I wanted to kiss her right now, I knew I had to run. I slowly got up and she was still staring right at me. I looked around to see everyone else in shock after what I just said to Vinyl. I looked back at Vinyl and she still had that same expression on her face. So, there is only one thing to do.

"Hey Vinyl?" I say, sheepishly

She growls in a 'WHAT?!' tone.

"Bye!" I say as I dash outside and start running towards home.

... Or at least I would have if it wasn't a pull door on this side ...

I ran straight first into the door and slowly fell backwards after being flattened vertically by the entrance. As I shook off the pain, I noticed a blurry white and blue figure above me. I thought it may of been some concerned pony coming to protect me from Vinyl's wrath but then I noticed another color, barely visible, but right on what appeared to be the figures face.

"Red..." I say, fuzzily, "... oh sweet Celes-"

I must have been knocked out after Vinyl laid a beat down on me. But, to be fair, I completely deserved it. As I started to awaken, I see that I am no longer in the Hay-Burger but in some sort of... Hospital... holy crap did I get hurt THAT badly? As I sit up and start to look around. Over in the chair across from the bed, a sobbing Unicorn is curled up in a ball. But, when my vision starts coming back to me, I notice it is Vinyl, crying out. I call out to her and her head darts up and she looks towards me.

"ANON!" she yells and dashes towards me.

As I wrap her into a hug, I notice she is starting to cry again.

"I'm so so so sorry!" She says, "I didn't mean to do this to you. I couldn't control myself! You probably hate me and never want to see me again and want me to stay away fro-"

"Its fine Vinyl." I say.

"You are probably sick of me an- wait what?" Vinyl looks up after clearing her eyes.

"I said its ok. I forgive you. In all honesty I sorta deserved it after what I said." I chuckle.

"Thank you..." She whispers, hopping up onto the bed and curling up beside me.

"Just, no more beating the crap out of the human. I hate hospitals!" I say, giving her a joking look.

"Aww, but you make a good punching bag!" She says.

"I know." I say, looking out the window, "It seems late, try to sleep."

"Ok." She says and almost instantaneously goes numb from sleep overtaking her.

"Sleep well, my little wub. And remember... I'll always love you."

I know she didn't mean what she did but it still was uncalled for. I doubt she believes me when I say that it's fine, so looks like I have to surprise her to show her I still care about her no matter what. Maybe its time to call one of her old friends and invite her over.

"Now, how to contact Octy?" I say to myself, puzzled.