“You summoned me Princess?” Shadow Wing asked, entering the dining hall as Luna sat down for breakfast.
“Yes Captain. Please, sit and have breakfast with me. I'd like to speak to you.” Luna said, offering the seat next to her with a smile as two plates of pancakes and salads were placed in their places.
“...alright then...” Shadow replied, cautiously doing as she was told.
“You are probably the closest thing to a Friend I have here in Canterlot. I'm taking a little vacation to Ponyville for a few days and You will accompany me.” Luna said with a smile.
“Of course Princess.” Shadow said.
“I don't think you understand. It's a vacation for you as well. I hear you're just as bad as I when it comes to taking breaks.” Luna said.
“but I don't want a vacation Princess...” Shadow said.
“Oh but you need one. Everypony needs time off to do what they want. Come with me and just have fun in ponyville.” Luna retorted.
“...Alright I guess...” Shadow conceded.
“Great! We will be leaving after breakfast, is this acceptable?” Luna asked.
“I see no problem with it.” Shadow replied.
---
“Is something bothering you?” Luna asked as the two walked to Ponyville, having been dropped off by the Chariot just out of sight range.
“Why did we land? I don't like having to walk so far with just the two of us...” Shadow replied, keeping one eye on the forest around them. They were walking along the border of the everfree.
“Stop doing your job and relax Shadow Wing. We landed so it won't be a formal entry or anything like that.” Luna answered.
“...Ok...I'll try...” Shadow conceded. Luna chuckled as six familiar forms made their way towards them.
“Princess Luna? What are you doing here?” Twilight asked.”
“Tia told me I needed a vacation. I could think of no other place but Ponyville. This is Shadow Wing, the captain of my Night Guard. She's on vacation as well though.” Luna explained.
“That's great! The Library is big but it might be a tight fir for both of you.” Twilight exclaimed.
“I've got a lot of work to do for the next few days at the weather station, if not I'd have let one of you stay with me.” Dash said.
“I would too! But mr. and mrs. cake are off in Trottingham and technically I don't own Sugarcube Corner.” Pinkie admitted.
“We got thuh space, but Ah don' think yuh'd want t'be woken up at thuh crack a'dawn tuh work in thuh fields.” Applejack said.
“I would love to house you Darling, but my little sister is occupying it for the week.” Rarity said
“It's Alright girls, we can manage.” Twilight assured her friends.
“Um...actually...I have space...and um...the animals are friendly enough...” Fluttershy said softly.
“Really? You sure Fluttershy?” Twilight asked.
“Um...yes...I'm sure.” Fluttershy said with a tiny smile.
“Well why are we worrying about where we're going to sleep when we have a party to go to?!” Pinkie screamed and bounced into the air.
“...Dare I ask but what party darling?” Rarity asked.
“It's a 'Welcome back to ponyville Princess Luna and welcome to ponyville Shadow Wing have lots of fun!' Party of course!” Pinkie exclaimed matter-of-factly.
“Oh of course, how could we not know that?” Dash said with a grin.
“Well come on everypony let's gooooooo!” Pinkie said mid-bounce and, from her spot two feet in the air, suddenly sped off towards sugar cube corner.
“What...just happened?” Luna asked.
“Pinkie Pie just happened...” Twilight mumbled as they followed.
---
the streets were nearly deserted as they made their way to the party pony's abode. It gave the group worry, that is until they turned the corner to see the bakery. There were Ponies everywhere, party decorations everywhere. They entered and Pinkie appeared from the rafters to float down like a sheet of paper.
“Hey guys glad you could make it!” she said.
“Pinkie, you told us about it first...” Dash said.
“I know that silly! I'm still glad you made it!” Pinkie retorted. She landed on the ground and swiftly bounced to the front of the room.
“Alrighty then everypony! I'm gunna have to ask all the little Fillies and Colts to sit this one out. I know, I hate making ponies leave just as much as you hate leaving but I'll make it up to you with a big super Foal-only party later!” Pinkie announced. There was a resounding 'Awww' but the underage foals filed out anyways, along with some parents.
“Oh it's THIS kind of party.” Twilight said with a chuckle as she and Luna found themselves a relatively empty corner to settle in.
“What do you mean?” Luna asked as Twilight floated two cups of punch over.
“Why would the number one party pony dismiss the younger Party-goers?” Twilight asked rhetorically as she wafted one of the beverages to Luna's nose. She detected a blend of fruit and the tickle of Alcohol with a hint of apples.
“Smells like Applejack Daniels.” Twilight commented as Luna's cup came into her own magical grip. They both sipped at it and smiled.
“This is very good. How long do you think this party would last?” Luna asked.
“As long as there's at least one pony still partying it won't end...one time Dash and Pinkie partied for three days straight...” Twilight replied.
“What was the party for?” Luna asked.
“Dash perfected a flight routine.” Twilight answered.
“Those are two crazy ponies.” Luna said with a smile.
---
“C'mon Lu~ w'gotta get home...” Twilight mumbled with a fit of giggles as the two stumbled their way down the street.
“Oh but the party is still goin' Twi~ I don' wanna sleep.” Luna replied.
“But we gotta...Spi-ike! Y'awake?!” Twilight replied, yelling into the house as they entered the Library.
“Yeah...whoa...are you drunk?” Spike asked, coming down the stairs.
“She's no' drunk she Wasted!” Luna blurted out, causing the two to cackle loudly.
“Oh great...I got the spare bed prepared like you asked me, I'm guessing you had fun at the party?” Spike said.
“Yes~.” the two sang and broke into another fit of giggles.
“Whatever I'm going to bed...” Spike said. He went upstairs, came back down with his basket- to attempt to get some sleep without the two drunken Mares waking him trying to get up the stairs- and fell asleep.
“He's such a...good little dragon...” Luna whispered- albeit rather loudly- to Twilight as they looked at the sleeping dragon.
“I know....s'my number one assistant...like m' little brother...sometime even son... Dunno...I'm tired...” Twilight said, finishing with a large yawn.
“Me too...” Luna replied sleepily.
When they finally made it to Twilight's room, where a small bed was next to Twilight's oversized one, Luna refused to take the big one as did Twilight.
“C'mon Lu~ you're big and that bed is small...” Twilight reasoned.
“You callin' me fat?!” Luna exclaimed.
“No...I'm callin' you bi boned.” Twilight retorted. They looked at each other for a solid five second before breaking out into laughter, Luna leaning on Twilight for support.
“Oh fine!” Luna started as she plopped down on Twilight's bed. “Compromise!” she said softly as she pulled the Lavender Mare down with her. They giggled d yawned wide. Twilight looked at Luna as the last of their giggles died down. They were snugly embraced as they stared. After a few moments their lips met. It was a sloppy drunken kiss, but it was still full of passion they had no idea the other had. When they separated they looked at each other dumbly, then broke into a light fit of giggles.
“Good night Twilight Sparkle.” Luna whispered.
“'Night Luna...” Twilight mumbled as sleep found them both rather quickly.
i LOVE writing drunk pairings...so...fun
668893 I know, but the chapter would have needed to be broken into two without them and I would have had to come up with two pages of fillers, and that dries it out
668878yes it actually was fun
I love drunken ponies!
the morning after is gonna be...interesting....
669066
Drunk pony, is best pony
I think an hangover is in place
The awkwardness in the next chapter will be interesting...
A little bit too fast in my opinion, but I can't blame you, it's yours to decide the pace, and well.. I still enjoy it! :D
Yes and now commence awakening
great chapter ah would give ya more thumbs up but it seems the button is broken ah could only do it once
------------------------
Lunar Justice
...And nothing sexual or ackward happend that night
669493
I couldn't help but notice this...
“Princess Luna? What are you doing here?” Twilight asked.”...
Notice that extra quotation mark?
Oh god, I'm done after this, but then there's
...a tight fir for both of you...
Yay, drunk shipping! Its the best kind
Oh the possible aftermath of this is amusing to think about.
I love the drunk ponies, but you should do a read through for capitalization. Some words aren't capitalized that should be and vice versa, and it was a bit distracting. Otherwise quite enjoyable, and I can't wait for more
We know nothing sexual happened (unless you count kissing as sexual), but Twilight and Luna do not know that, and I doubt they will remember much of last night or how they got in bed with each other.
Pretty good, but Applejack's southern twang is a bit too thick, in my humble opinion.
I think I spoke about this once before, but I dislike drunk ponies- it just really tore me out of the story.
Anyway, the only constructive thing I have to say is that you have to go easier on Applejacks accent.
Try to only do the traditional Ah and lay off things like "thuh" and other heavy accented words.
It's easier to portray applejack in your head with subtle accenting than to read other peoples interpretation of her accent.
Also, mind your capitalization, there's a few 'Lavender and Friendship and You's in there.
Otherwise this is pretty decent, could use some more emotional insight and longer scenes, but it seems alright to me.
My writer's brain kicked in at the very last second with the drunk ponies part, and the scene played out like a video. I didn't stop laughing!
Just a few small things to fix:
“Princess Luna? What are you doing here?” Twilight asked.”
There are three inverted commas.
I would too! But mr. and mrs. cake are off in Trottingham and technically I don't own Sugarcube Corner.” Pinkie admitted.
Needs some of dem capitalization on Mr. & Mrs Cake.
But besides that, methink me loves drunk ponies.
Keep the work up!
669066 They are both drunk, nither will remember.
669790
it's common for twilight to not remember, but what about luna...either way, they will wake up in the same bed, either one wakes first and makes her way out and then awkwardly pretends they did not sleep in the same bed all night or both wakes up at roughly the same time...awkward moment ensues...
Grats on getting Feature-box! Course, it is you, so...
669840 it makes me grin every time i see it on there
Yes, drunk sloppy kissing! THE BEST POSSIBLE THING!
I keep coming back here just to look at that image!
670033 i know I love it too, I found it on DA but i uploaded the story in school and DA was blocked so i couldn't get the original source
670035 Really? DA was suspiciously unblocked at my school! Then again, they seemed to not be able to make up their minds. One week, EQD is open, and this site is blocked, the next week it flips around!
670056 this and eqd aren't, though since EQD doesn't actually post any fics of their own- only links to the fics and stuff- I don't use it...plus the fic limitations calls for boring and repetitive biased fics
669706 if i don't put the accented i get yelled at for taking the accent away, i agree with you...it's just most people think the accent isn't enough fi I don't do it like that. and why do drunk ponies tear you out of the story? same as any other race being drunk in a fic...I change it up though so it's not as 'wasted' drunk though
670069 Absolutely true. I go on there for art, mostly. sometimes I'll find a good story to start following, but I'll always follow it on here.
670088 i only go to deviantart for fics when I want to go reread some epic NaruHina
670160 Mattwilson83?
670222 That's doujinshi, and yeeeessss i love NHC. but seriouslym if you type in NaruHina Fanfic into the deviant art search I have read every single-good- fic that comes up across all the pages
670083 I don't like them in MLP fics because I feel its ooc from parties shown and refered and unneeded as a plot device.
I don't like it in other fics of non mlp origin either, but it all depends on why it's brought up and how it is done.
It's just a personal hangup- I do believe authors should refer to the shows when doing parties though, Pinkie Pie's parties always seemed like fun to me. Notice how even Gummy's party, that went into the night, did not have alcohol. Obviously because of the shows demographic and timeslot, but that gives the base for the universe and canon.
I'm not sure how I'm coming across here, but I'm not wanting for you to change the fic or anything, I just like to point it out when I can, just a personal hangup of mine, just like how Sweetie Bell does not live with Rarity, but spends a lot of time there.
I'll probably try to read next chapter too, I haven't read the original so I'll give this revision a try.
Anyway, the accent you could modify and simplify.
I think it looks cleaner if you remove almost all the slang. You know, remove almost everything except Ah and Mah.
Feel free to do what you want, but I always felt that fics that use as little as possible made Applejack easier to read and hear in your head.
670237 Well, he does fics, too. At least, I thought I remembered he did. Idk, I haven't been on DA since ponies.
There is pretty much nothing I love more than drunk ponies.
670250 i get that, it's just making drunk characters in fics I use to do two things and make these things easier. first- shipping/awkward hilarity. nothing like a nice sloppy drunken kiss to realize you like someone. and second, just plain hilarity. you can make a drunk character as OOC as you want when they're drunk, hilarity ensues(AKA Neji in a fic of mine getting so drunk he thinks he's a dog) as for the accent I'll trim it down
Oh, the original is no longer up. I deleted it, the original was wall of text upon wall of text and the story had even worse pacing issues
670310
Drunken ponies
“What...just happened?” Luna asked.
“Pinkie Pie just happened...” Twilight mumbled as they followed.
Some questions only have one answer, no matter how hard you try to find others. I'm putting that answer up there with "Because he's BATMAN."
Aaaaannndddd, they're drunk. Of course. This is gonna get REAL awkward.
Drunk Twilight is best Twilight. Socially awkward nerdy girl on a bender is just hilarity waiting to happen.
Great read, but ease up on apple jack . I actually had to sound it out in my head to read one line lol! I don't think she's even that bad in the show either
Favorited for using my favorite Twiluna pic as your story image. I shall read it later.
cant wait for the next chapter, if they dont remeber the kiss, I bet the fact that they fell asleep with eachother should scare the crap out of them
This just gets better and better.
Huh, had to actually go back and look for Applejack's lines to see what people were complaining about, I honestly didn't even notice the way you did the accent when I first read it.
- Tomorrow comes.
So does blundering.
Before I read this, just a heads up, judging from the description it sounds like this should have an alternate universe tag on it, that's all!
671700 eh, not really alternate universe. just one little change that winds up have different long term effects