Choose Your Own Adventure: Your Self Insert Asks Pinkie Pie for a Date

by Palm Palette

(20)

...tiny steamed rice balls wrapped in spinach leaves. There are three in total. You carefully cut one in half and slide that plus one whole ball over to Pinkie's side. In addition to the main course, the waiter places two glasses of water on the table.

“Where's the food?” Pinkie asks.

“This is the food.” You poke your rice ball with your fork and pop it in your mouth. It's bland and unseasoned, just the way you like it.

Pinkie, however, is using a pair of tweezers to hold hers. “Are you sure? Because it looks so tiny...”

“Of course; there's nothing quite so healthy as a ball of rice wrapped in spinach leaves.”

“Healthy? Are you saying that I'm fat?” Pinkie sets down her tweezers and and grabs her tummy, pinching a fold of fat.

“Well, you are a little pudgy, but don't worry; a strict regimen of healthy diet and plenty of exercise will get you in shape in no time. I personally can't stand ponies who let themselves go over something as trivial as food. Anypony who dates me should be fit and trim.”

“...really?”

“Heh, well, it is an ideal, but it's one that I hold in high regard. Of course, since it's our first date and all I decided to splurge a little. It's time for dessert.”

Pinkie perks up at the mention of dessert, but looks around confused. You slide the extra half of a rice ball on your fork and eat that too.

“Please tell me that wasn't your dessert.”

“Of course it was. Do you think I'd actually indulge in sweets? Pah! There's nothing more unhealthy than that.”

Pinkie glances around and shifts in her seat. “Uh, I need to go freshen up a bit. I'll be right back.”

“Hm, sure, go right ahead.” You sip from your glass of sparkling calorie-free mineral water.

Pinkie walks off, but instead of returning, you see Rarity walk in. The white unicorn slides into Pinkie's seat. “Is that eu de oryza? That's one of my favorites.” She levitates the rice ball and takes a daintly little bite off the side.

You blink. “Uh, yes, but what happened to Pinkie Pie? She said she was going to be right back.”

“Well, she got held up a bit by a seven layer, double fudge, chocolate-dipped cake. But don't worry, I can fill in for her and tell her what an amazing date she had later. Oh my, is that pure, sparkling, mineral-free springwater? You sure know how to treat a lady right.” Rarity takes a sip, and you can't help but wonder just went wrong. Perhaps if you hadn't insulted Pinkie and her diet, she wouldn't have walked out on you.

Go back.

Comments

[joeyjumper94]

At least you picked up one of Pinkie's friends.

[cheesegal]

well, a date with rarity is better anyways