Choose Your Own Adventure: Your Self Insert Asks Pinkie Pie for a Date

by Palm Palette

(19)

...a lobster.

The boiled, red crustacean lies atop a bed of rice and is garnished with sprigs of parsley. The whole dish steams and smells with a distinctive seafood aroma.

“What is that?” Pinkie pokes it with a fork, which tinks against the lobster's shell.

“It's—” you take a moment to glance at the menu “—genuine boiled lobster, fresh from the sea.” The menu also says, 'a delight to griffons everywhere' but you decide not to read that part aloud.

“Lobster?” Pinkie narrows her eyes and stares at its beady eyes. “Are you sure it's even edible? It looks like a giant bug.”

“What? Of course it is! I certainly paid enough money for it.” You snap off one of the lobster's tiny legs and pop it into your mouth. It has a mildly salty texture unlike anything you've tasted before, and your eyes widen as you chew on it. “Mmm, crunchy,” you manage to say after forcing the bite down. “Now you try some. It's good.”

Pinkie also breaks off a leg, but is far more reluctant to put it in her mouth. She examines the tiny limb, twirling it around on her fork. Her eyes go wide and she drops it back on the platter. Looking past you, she grins widely. “Fluttershy? What are you doing here?”

You swivel around and come face-to-face with an irate pegasus. You wilt under her gaze.

“I came because somepony ordered lobster for their date.” Fluttershy frowns and pokes the dish with her hoof. “In case you don't know, they boiled this cutesy-wootsy little thing alive just so that you could feast on its remains.”

“What?” Pinkie pales.

“Hey, it's not that bad.” You point at the lobster. “It does kinda look like a big bug. There's nothing bad about killing bugs, right?”

“Uh oh.” Pinkie averts her eyes.

Fluttershy glances at her flank where her cutie mark of three butterflies is visible. She then glares at you and...

The next think you know, you're stuffed in a trash can. This did not go nearly as well as you'd hoped. Perhaps you should have thought twice before ordering seafood for somepony who's best friends with Ponyville's primer animal lover.

Go back.

Comments

[Phenoix12]

derpicdn.net/img/2014/8/1/688082/full.png

'Oh sh---'

[DiamondBrony99]

Once they mentioned Fluttershy, I kept saying "oh no" repeatedly..... You do not, I repeat, DO NOT EAT ANIMALS IN FRONT OF FLUTTERSHY.