Pinkamena Diane Pie's Perplexing Probability Predictions
There are some things in the universe that science or magic just can't explain. Like where did magic come from? When did it first manifest? And why out of all the habitable planets in all of the galaxies did it manifest here? But this isn't about the great mysteries of the universe, but rather one in our little town. And that is the mystery of Pinkamena Diane Pie.
Everypony in town knows who she is? After all, she's made it a goal to know everypony who lives here and everypony who visits. She's a baker, a party planner, The Element of Laughter, and all in all a pony who does anything to cheer you up when you're feeling down. But she's also a pony of peculiar habits. There's just something about her nopony that can explain. A logic all her own that I'm not sure even she fully understands. Most ponies who know her just chalk it up to Pinkie being Pinkie and move on with their day. But then most ponies aren't Twilight Sparkle or me.
By the way, in case any of you were wondering whatever happened regarding that message I wrote about Diamond Tiara. You know the one where I called her a big fat flank. Well, not much ever came of it because Spoiled Rich called up the Newspaper Office and threatened litigation for slander and defamation of character if they published a story about it. She also had them place a notice stating the Rich family would sue anypony who spread gossip about 'events that happened last night.'
The following Monday, Ms. Cheerilee gave a speech about sensitivity and feelings which summed up 'Please don't tease Diamond Tiara or her mom will cut our funding. Without mentioning either by name of course. But come on, even Snips and Snails figured it out. Lastly, Granny Smith decided to paddle me as punishment but after the paddle broke in two on the first blow, she settled on grounding me and doubling my chores for the rest of the week.
Anyway back to my story, It was the first day of the end of my punishment. And I decided it was as good a time as ever to visit the library. Luckily Applejack had to go to the market to pick up some groceries and she agreed to pick me up when she was done. I took my time getting there, relishing the feeling of fresh grass on my hooves and the cool autumn breeze in my coat. It was nice just to take a walk around town after being corralled at the orchard for an entire week.
Suddenly, I noticed Pinkie Pie hiding behind a tree. She was wearing a rainbow-striped umbrella hat on her head and looking nervously up at the sky. I looked up but all I could see were clear skies and pegasi. Nothing out of the usual. Meanwhile, Pinkie zipped from cover to cover like she was afraid somepony would spot her above. Maybe she and Rainbow Dash were in some sort of prank war and she didn't want the cyan pegasus to find her. I searched the skies again but Rainbow was nowhere in sight. Pinkie ran out from under a rock and looked down at her tail which was twitching back and forth.
"Hmm...twitchy...twitcha twitcha twitch,"
My ears perked up as I realized what was going to happen. I looked to see a frog falling from a cart headed right for my head. With lightning reflexes, I stood up on my hind legs and caught the amphibian in my forehooves.
"Ribbit."
"He said nice reflexes in frog," Pinkie said turning to face me.
You see sometimes Pinkie has these strange tics that she calls her Pinkie Sense. Supposedly each one of them means a different thing. How? I have no idea, maybe she's an alien too, or something.
"Oh no!" I heard Fluttershy's voice cry from above. I looked up to see the yellow pegasus was pulling a cart filled with frogs, as well as carrying a basket and wearing a saddlebag filled with amphibians. "I'm coming Slippy," Fluttershy carefully landed in front of me. "Is he alright?" I looked at the frog and he looked at me.
"Ribbit,"
"I think he'll be alright," I said as I hoofed him back to Fluttershy.
"Oh thank goodness," She sighed with relief as she placed Slippy gently in her basket. "I'm so glad you were here, Apple Comet. I shudder to think of what might've happened if you weren't."
"Think nothing of it Fluttershy," I said. "What are you doing with all these frogs anyway?"
"Oh, I was transporting them to Froggy Bottom Bog. You see their pond has been getting a little overpopulated lately, and I just couldn't bear to see those poor frogs hopping into each other. So I'm taking them to where they'll have more space."
A warm fuzzy feeling came over my heart as I watched Fluttershy make a headcount of all the frogs. Whether they were great or small, Fluttershy's kind heart and gentle nature never ceased to surprise me.
"Well, glad I could help out," I said.
"Oh Apple Comet," She leaned in and gave me a gentle kiss on the cheek. "You're such a sweet young colt." I breathed in the smell of her organic shampoo, it smelled like fresh dahlias. A flower befitting the bearer of the Element of Kindness. "Well, I must be going now if I'm going to reach Froggy Bottom Bog by this afternoon. Bye-bye now." With that, she took off with her slimy cargo in tow.
"I should probably be going too," I said to Pinkie Pie. As soon as I took my first step, she ran up in front of me.
"Wait!" She hollered and reached behind her pulling out a matching umbrella hat. "Safety first."
"I'm not gonna wear that," I said pushing it away from me.
"Ah, ah-ah, safety first," Pinkie said trying to put it on my head.
"I don't need it," I protested.
"That's not what twitchy tail says." She said singingly."
"Okay first off your tail isn't twitching, second an umbrella isn't adequate protection from falling objects larger than frogs and third I'll look ridiculous."
"Oh my gosh! Is that Niels Grasse Tycho behind you?" Pinkie suddenly pointed behind me and shouted.
You're going to have to do better than that," I said rolling my eyes. But Pinkie wasn't paying attention to me.
"Thank you so much for coming, Mr. Tycho. How was your trip?"
My ears twitched and I turned around to see Twilight Sparkle walking down the other end of the street with a golden unicorn stallion. He was wearing a light blue button shirt with a black vest that was decorated with golden suns and silver moons. His mane was jet black and frizzy and he sported a mustache on his face. On his flank was a cutie mark of the constellation Corvus the crow with a red star highlighting one of its eyes.
"Quite pleasurable actually," He said in a smooth baritone voice.
"Holy Celestia!" I exclaimed, "It's Niels Grasse Tycho!" I couldn't believe it, Niels Grasse Tycho the foremost authority on astronomy in all of Equestria was talking to Twilight Sparkle. I galloped over as fast as I could without going to superspeed.
"Twitcha twitch!" I heard Pinkie cry out followed by the sound of a rope unraveling wire by wire.
"Look out, It's gonna fall!" A mare cried as I looked above me to see a harness holding up a piano that was seconds from giving way. Time instantly seemed to slow down. One of the movers tripped and fell putting him straight in the path of the piano. He looked up just as the rope snapped sending the piano plunging sideways toward him.
WHOOOSH! In a flash, I reached him and pushed him to safety but now the piano was just inches from my head. I closed my eyes and braced for the impact.
...The next sound I heard, was the glowing hum of a magic aura. I opened my ears to see the piano suspended inside a magenta mana cloud. It floated gently upward and righted itself before setting itself down in the street.
"Oh, my gosh! Apple Comet, are you alright?" Twilight's face was covered with cold sweat. Her heart raced inside her chest.
"Y-Yeah, I-I'm fine," I assured her as dusted myself off.
"What in Equestria were you thinking? You could've been killed." Twilight scolded me not knowing it would take more than a piano to even scratch me.
"I guess I just wasn't thinking about that," I said.
"Well, you were lucky I was around when it happened."
"I could say the same thing about him," said the stallion I'd saved. He was a young well-built earth pony with a beige coat and a dirty blonde mane dressed in a blue movers jacket and cap. "I thought I was a goner for sure." He took off his cap and held it timidly in his hoof. "I have to know, why did you do it? What made you sacrifice yourself to save me?"
I simply told him: "It was the right thing to do."
"Sweet Celestia, I almost got a colt flattened." He slumped down muttering to himself. Twilight looked at both of us unsure of what to say.
"Twilight is everyone alright?" Niels Grasse Tycho came running up to us. His shirt was splotched with patches of sweat.
"Thankfully," Twilight said with relief.
"Well thank Celestia for that," he looked at me with relief in his eyes.
"So Apple Comet, Twilight tells me you're a fan of mine," Tycho said as we sat inside the library.
"I've read all your books and articles," I said with excitement. "I've wanted to be an astronomer like you since I was six years old." He glanced down at the red comet on my flank. Almost as if he'd seen it somewhere before. For a moment, I was afraid he might be on to me. Then he said,
"Well, it looks like you've already got the mark for it." I'm not ashamed to admit I fanboyed a little when I heard that.
"So what are you doing in Ponyville?" I asked once I'd calmed down.
"I've come searching for the Red Comet," He answered. Suddenly all the pieces fell into place. Tycho's visit to Ponyville wasn't due to mere happenstance. He was here because yours truly called his sister's bully a big fat flank. I had to admit I had conflicting feelings about it. While I was well aware of the danger of my secret being discovered, I couldn't help but be starstruck at the chance to talk with one of my idols.
"So how long are you staying in Ponyville?"
"Until next Saturday,"
"A whole week!" My favorite astronomer was going to be staying in my hometown for an entire week. My outburst brought Twilight teleporting downstairs.
*POP!* "What's going on down here? I heard shouting." She asked anxiously. I was too embarrassed to say anything so I just slunk down in my seat.
"We're fine Twilight," Tycho assured her. "Apple Comet just got a little overexcited is all." Twilight's violet eyes darted over to my seat.
"Sorry," I whispered in my best Fluttershy impression. She snorted in disappointment and sighed.
"Just try to keep it down okay? This is a library. Other ponies could be trying to read." With another pop, she was gone leaving the two of us alone again. Flashing an awkward smile, I willed my body back into a proper seating position.
"So how's Manehatten? I got a cousin that lives there you know."
"So this Tycho fella is in town looking for the Red Comet huh?" Applejack made it no secret that she was less than pleased with the news.
"Yep, and he's staying here for an entire week," I said as we walked the road back to the farm.
"How can you be so calm about it?" Apple Bloom asked nervously. "Aren't you worried he's gonna find out who you are?"
"Because panicking won't help my situation, I need to approach it with a calm logical state of mind," I answered.
Truth be told I was sweating buckets on the inside. Niels Grasse Tyson was no detective but with his know-how of Astrophysics combined with Twilight's first hoof encounters with me. I knew the risk of them solving the mystery of the Red Comet was statistically high.
"And how do y'all plan on calmly approaching it?" Applejack asked as we approached the gate to the orchard. As soon as she saw us, Winona looked up from a hole she had been filling and came running.
"Step by step of course," I said.
Step one: Cover my bases. I needed to make sure any evidence of my alien heritage was safely locked away and hidden.
"Hello, Young Master, it's been a while since your last visit." The electronic voice greeted me as I pulled off the tarpaulin.
"Hello Kerax, How's the work coming on the memory crystal?" The glow of his hologram projector illuminated the corner of the barn. The image of my parent's memories looked more cohesive than last time, but I could see there was still a long way to go.
"Progress on memory crystal repair at 13.3 trillion neurons reconnected." At the current rate, I calculate the odds of 100% resynchronization at 49.4 percent. How are you finding life on Equus?"
"Actually, that's why I'm here. You see there's this pony that just arrived in town today. His name is Niels Grasse Tyson and he's a world-renowned astronomer.
"I see, what does this have to do with you?"
"Well, he's come here searching for the Red Comet. I don't think he'll come looking here, but just to be safe I'm gonna move you somewhere a little more discreet." I levitated up to the ceiling beams and carefully examined the floor of the barn. I inverted my body so that I was facing the floor and dove straight down into the ground. Vibrating my body through layers of dirt and rock, I burrowed a shaft underneath the barn. When I was satisfied with its depth, I tunneled through the wall and flew back up so the ship would fit. Finally, when the shaft was wide enough, I burrowed a den out of the bedrock at the bottom in which to hide it. When I was done, I had a wide spacious chamber in which to hide my ship, plus some extra space for myself.
"Not too shabby if I do say so myself," I said as I flew back up. "You, ready Kerax," I asked.
"As I'll ever be sir," He said closing the hatch door.
I raised the ship upright, then reached and lifted it by the tail. Not surprisingly it felt as light as a feather. "You know it's kind of funny," I said as I floated it over to the shaft.
"What is?" Kerax asked as I floated the two of us down
"This ship carried me from Kolton to Equis, and now I'm carrying it."
"Yes, I suppose it is funny in an ironic sort of way." He remarked dryly as we descended to the bottom.
"Yeesh, tough crowd."
Once my ship was safely tucked away, all that was left was to cover the hole. I gathered together a few spare boards and nails. Using my hooves as a hammer, I assembled a makeshift trap door and frame. I used some spare barn door hinges from Pa's old workbench and an old horseshoe for a latch. In no time at all, I had a fully functional trap door. I covered it with a layer of dirt and hay so anypony who stepped on it would be unable to tell it was there.
"Okay, there's that taken care of." I felt a sense of pride as I dusted my hooves off in satisfaction. It was then that I became aware of the dirt and dust I was covered in.
"Ugh," Step two *sigh* Take a bath.
Splash!
"Apple Comet, do me a favor, next time you want to go digging holes in the barn, ask first if it's okay?" Applejack said as she dumped another bucket of water over my head. Since I was covered head to hoof in dirt, soil, and rock dust, I wasn't allowed inside to bathe. So I had to take a bath in the wooden tub.
"What's it look like down there?" Apple Bloom with curious excitement.
"Right now it's pitch dark if you can't illuminate your body," I answered as Applejack scrubbed me over with a brush. I'm thinking of turning it into a secret hideaway.
"Well, you're not gonna spend all your time down there like a prairie dog." My big sister scolded scrubbing deeper into my coat."
"I know, It's just gonna be for those times where I need a little solitude." My ears perked up as they picked up the sound of rolling cartwheels and two familiar voices arguing.
"So basically I get these different little niggly feelings, and they mean different things. Like when my back is itchy it means it's my lucky day. And when my knee gets pinchy, it means something scary is about to happen."
"Ugh, Pinkie Pie, we really don't have time for all this 'Pinkie Sense' nonsense. We're here to answer serious scientific questions."
"Twilight are you sure we need all this equipment? I thought we were just going to ask a few questions."
"We're also here to gather important scientific data."
Through the side of the barn, I could see Twilight, Spike, Pinkie Pie, and Niels Grasse Tycho walking up the hill to the orchard. The Lavender unicorn was hauling a wagon loaded with seemingly every type of scientific surveying equipment you could imagine.
"Oh and when my shoulder's achy, it means there's an alligator in the tub."
Suddenly I felt something scaly brush against my hind leg. I looked down to see a pair of purple reptilian eyes staring up at me.
"Neigh!" With a neigh, I leaped so high out of the tub that I broke through the ceiling and the cloud cover.
Third Pony Pov.
"What in Equestria is that?" Twilight gasped in astonishment as she watched something shoot through the roof of Sweet Apple Acres. The object went straight up vertically piercing the cloud overhead.
"Well, my shoulder was just achy a moment ago." Pinkie offered her explanation.
"That doesn't make sense !" Twilight irritably pointed out. "You just said an achy shoulder means there's an alligator in a bathtub. Not something just flew through the roof! You're putting holes in your own logic!"
Pinkie's tail began to twitch. "Oooh boy!"
"Take cover!" Spike cried diving under the wagon.
"Relax Spike," Twilight calmly reassured her nervous assistant. It's all the way over at Sweet Apple Acres. The odds of it landing near are a million to one."
Plop!
Chomp!
A toothless baby alligator landed on Twilight's head and bit down on her horn
"NEEEIIIIGGHHH!" Twilight let out a neigh of terror and reared back. She thrashed her head back and forth trying to dislodge the bug-eyed lizard. "Get it off! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!" The alligator spun back and forth like a scaly gymnast on a bar. Finally, the gator released its grip executing a triple somersault and landing on all fours.
"Bravo, bravo!" Pinkie held up a perfect ten scorecard. "That was magnificent Gummy!" She congratulated as she scooped the baby alligator in her hooves. The young gator blinked it's bulging its eyes at her, then proceeded to start biting around her head with its gums. Pinkie laughed playfully as he bit down on one of her ears.
"What is going on here?" Niels Grasse Tycho asked. The astronomer's eyes were struggling to blink at what he was seeing.
"This is Gummy, my pet alligator," Pinkie said holding the reptile in front of him. "He's got no teeth see?" Tycho's face twitched a little as Gummy stuck out his tongue to touch one of his eyeballs.
"That's um...very nice," Pinkie." He was beginning to question if coming here was a good idea.
"Okay, okay I get it," Twilight said trying desperately to maintain a modicum of calm in the situation. "Can we please get going? I'd like to get this field surveying done sometime before nightfall."
"Okey dokey lokey!" Pinkie said somehow giving an okay gesture with her hoof. "Twilight facehoofed and began walking again.
Apple Comet's POV.
As I watched the scene play out below me, I realized how close I was to being found out. After regaining my momentum, I ducked down on top of a cloud, laying my body out flat so as not to be easily seen. I couldn't stand or walk on it the way Pegasi could, so I simply levitated in place splayed out like a carpet. I could feel the moisture soaking into my coat like drops of dew.
"Apple Comet!" I heard Applejack holler my name through the hole I'd made in the roof. Oh well, just another chore to be added to the list. "Apple Comet get down here right now!"
"What if he can't hear us?" Apple Bloom asked.
"Oh, he hears us alright, and if he knows what's good for him, he'll come down right now!"
At that moment, however, the best place for me to be was on this cloud. Because unbeknownst to Applejack at that time, Twilight and company were walking up to the barn.
Umm, Applejack?" Apple Bloom tugged at our big sister's leg.
"Not now Apple Bloom," She said before looking back up through the ceiling. "Apple Comet, I'm gonna count to three and if y'all ain't down here, y'all are gonna be peeling apples for the next week. One...two...three...
"Applejack who are you talking to?" Twilight asked walking up to the barn door. Applejack turned and gasped when she saw her friend standing there hauling a wagon full of scientific doodads.
"Gah! Twilight when did you get here?"
"That's what A'h was trying to tell ya, but nopony listens to Apple Bloom," My little sis whispered with a roll of her eyes. Applejack smiled embarrassingly.
"So what brings you all by?" She asked.
"What was that thing that crashed through your roof just now?" Twilight pointed to the hole I'd left. Applejack and Apple Bloom looked up through the gaping hole at the blue sky.
"Uh, thing?" Even from up here, I could see the beads of sweat rising from my big sister's pores. She was stuck between a rock and a hard place and she knew it. Thankfully before Applejack could blow her cover, Pinkie Pie cut in.
"I think I can answer that question. See Gummy was obviously practicing his Gator cannonball trick, he's been practicing these last several weeks. At first, I was like Gummy are you loco in the coco? Firing yourself out of a cannon is dangerous and should only be attempted by trained professionals. But he shrugged and simply said...Mff mffph..."
Having heard enough, Twilight wrapped her magic around Pinkie's snout and muzzled her. Despite this, Pinkie continued with her story. "Alright never mind, forget I asked," she said. For a moment Applejack breathed a sigh of relief. "We were wondering if we could set up a survey site around here."
"What are y'all surveying? if y'all don't mind me asking?" Applejack turned her attention to Tycho. "And who is this?"
"Niels Grasse Tycho," He said offering her his hoof. Applejack shook it with a caution that was uncharacteristic of her.
"Oh, right, y'all are the fancy Astro guy Apple Comet was yakking about. It's nice to meet you," I wondered what he would say about me if he knew I was up here.
"Y'all planning on going stargazing later?" Apple Bloom asked him curiously.
"Not quite, Tycho admitted. "We're researching the Red Comet." Whatever poker face my sisters had up until that moment collapsed like a house of cards.
"My, um...how fascinating," Applejack said anxiously.
"Y-yeah, please tell us more." Apple Bloom with a nervous smile.
"Are you two feeling alright?" Twilight's gaze narrowed as she began to catch on that the two of them were acting rather unusual.
"Are we feeling alright?" Applejack laughed nervously. "What a silly question, of course, we're feeling alright aren't we Apple Bloom?"
"Yep fit as a fiddle," Twilight wasn't buying it.
"You two are hiding something, I can tell."
"What, us? Come on Twilight, we're the Apples the most honest folk in all of Ponyville," Her face was flush with sweat.
"Alright Applejack, fess up. "What do you know about the comet that you aren't telling us?" Applejack's defenses were crumbling right in front of my eyes. It would take a miracle to save them. A miracle that didn't involve me.
Poof! Beep Beep Beep Ba Beep Beep Beep! Out of nowhere, Pinkie Pie's tail flattened out like an inside-out umbrella.
"Pinkie?" Twilight asked slowly stepping back from the party planner. "Why is your tail beeping?"
"I dunno, this is a new one to me," Pinkie said as her tail began sweeping around like a radar dish. Suddenly it stopped and pointed due south. "Wait, hold on, I'm getting something. The comet is going to appear...at Froggy Bottom Bog!"
Twilight's brow furrowed, while Applejack and Apple Bloom just looked up through the hole in the ceiling.
"Let me guess, your pinkie senses are tingling?" The librarian asked unimpressed.
"Right medium but wrong publisher," Pinkie answered.
"And where was this twitch all the other times the comet appeared huh?" Twilight continued. A question I wanted to know the answer to myself. Pinkie offered up her own theory.
"Well, I don't know all the details yet, but given the comet is a relatively recent phenomenon in Ponyville, it's possible my Pinkie Sense hadn't yet calibrated to accurately predict its appearance."
"And was it planning to do this before the Ursa Major or after the Dragon?" While Twilight continued to give Pinkie the skeptic's argument, I decided the timing was as good as ever to make my escape.
Carefully levitating my body off of the cloud, I floated quietly over to the back of the farmhouse. After checking to make sure the coast was clear, I quietly settled gently down. My coat was wet and dewy from being in contact with that cloud. On the bright side, most of my dirt spots were gone so that was a plus.
"So Pinkie Sense says the comet is gonna appear at Froggy Bottom Bog." While I pondered the possibility of how Pinkie knew that even before I did, She continued to argue with Twilight. It didn't look like things were going to calm down anytime soon.
"You know what? Just forget it! If you'll excuse me, Tycho and I have real scientific phenomena to study." With a snort, Twilight backed the cart out of the barn and trotted away. Unfortunately, she was so frustrated that didn't see the open cellar door in front of her.
"Ear flop, eye flutter, knee twitch!"
"Give it up, Pinkie, I'm not falling for that ag-ah!
"Hey, Twilight what are you doing?" I asked from the bottom of the staircase. Thank you super-speed.
"Apple Comet, you startled me." She wiped her forehead with relief.
"You should really watch where you're going, you almost walked into our new root cellar." She smiled at me.
"I guess this makes us even for earlier huh?" Boy if she only knew.
"What've you got in the cart?" I asked.
"Oh, this? Just some scientific instruments. Niels Grasse Tycho and I gonna be gonna surveying the orchard to see if the comet left any clues behind."
"That's cool, anyway I just remembered there's something important I need to do, so I'll leave you to it." I walked up the stairs and closed the cellar doors. As I walked back to the house, Twilight said something that made my inner nerd squee.
"Hey Apple Comet, I'm sure if you ask nicely Niels Grasse Tycho would gladly autograph your copy of his book." With renewed vigor, I raced upstairs to my bedroom and grabbed my copy of Astrophysics for Ponies in a Hurry, and one other thing.
The humid swamp air clung to my coat like moss to the side of a tree. The sound of buzzing wings and chirping crickets meant I was getting close. I'd left Astrophysics for Ponies in a Hurry on the kitchen table and a note on the front door saying I was going for a short walk and would be back later. I didn't say that I'd be bringing my saddlebags and my clothing matrix though. But then I didn't want anypony to know where I was going until I got back. A cut across the orchard and a superspeed dash through the Everfree Forest later, I was close to Froggy Bottom Bog. My hooves were spattered with mud and my coat was covered with leaves and burs, but I didn't care. As I reached the end of the tree line, I came to a stagnant slough. The shore was lined with rows of vine-covered cypress trees. Cattail reeds and tall flat mushrooms grew in the pea soup green still waters. It was everything an amphibian could ask for. Speaking of which...
"Ribbit, ribbit, ribbit."
Standing along the shore, Fluttershy watched eagerly as her froggy friends hopped from her cart to their new home. She was smiling warmly the way a mother does when she watches her foal take their first steps. It's a scene that made me wish I'd brought a camera. Suddenly the stillness of the water was broken by an enormous breach. A massive brown head rose from the water, its neck rising to seemingly blot out the setting sun. Then another head broke the surface followed by two more. Four pairs of green-slitted eyes stared down at the yellow pegasus, eyeing what must have looked like a tasty meal. Fluttershy stood frozen mouth agape, she couldn't scream, she couldn't run, She could only watch as the hydra's heads lunged toward her. Their leathery lips salivating at their soon-to-be morsel.
"Fluttershy!"
As the initial shock wore off, I grabbed my costume matrix from my saddlebag and charged. In a flash of red and blue, my hooves left the ground as I scooped up Fluttershy and carried her away seconds before the hydra's jaws could snap shut around her. The four heads let out a collective roar of disappointment as we ascended above the treeline out of its reach. Looking down and realizing what just happened, Fluttershy finally found the voice to scream.
"EEEEEYYYYAAAAAAAAHHHH!
Third Pony Pov.
"Did you hear that?" Twilight Sparkle looked up from the map she had been graphing. Her eyes darted back and forth looking for the source of the disturbance.
"Hear what?" Spike asked looking confused.
"I could've sworn I heard something just now. Did you hear anything Tycho?" The astronomer looked up from the total station he'd been calibrating.
"No, should I have heard something?" He answered.
"Forget it, it was probably just the wind or something." Twilight shrugged her shoulders and went back to what she was doing.
Comet's Pov.
After dropping Fluttershy off at her house, I flew back over the Everfree Forest to hide my tracks. I took the opportunity to burn the mud off my hooves with my heat vision. The less evidence that I was at that bog the better. As I passed over, I again saw the hydra still fuming over its lost meal. With four heads to remember me by, I doubted it would forget about me any time soon.
I touched down at the edge of the forest and changed out of my costume. After checking to make sure the coast was clear, I slipped through the fence and walked the trail back to the orchard. If anypony asked I'd gone out for a short walk. When I arrived at Sweet Apple Acres, Twilight, Spike, and Tycho were still there. Since they seemed busy, I decided to head inside and grab my copy of Astrophysics for Ponies in a Hurry. When I looked through the kitchen wall, however, it was gone. A quick examination of the kitchen revealed a trail of familiar yellow hoofprints leading outside to a table at the worksite.
"Hey, Twilight, how's it coming along out here?" I asked walking up casually.
"Hey, Apple Comet, did you take care of that important thing you were supposed to do?" She asked me.
I smiled confidently and said, "Yeah, I did,"
"Your little sister stopped by earlier," Tycho said. "Seems you left your copy of my book on the kitchen table."
"Oh, was that where it was?" I said turning my head towards the table. "I was wondering where I left it,"
"You should probably thank her next time you see her." He added.
"Oh, I will," I assured him. I opened the book and was surprised to find something on the inside of the front cover.
To Apple Comet, always keep reaching for the stars and stay clear of rising pianos.
Your friend and fellow astronomer, Niels Grasse Tycho.
I didn't know a koltonian could faint until now.
Third Pony POV.
The Next Day.
The front door swung open as Twilight Sparkle stepped into Sugarcube Corner. Right away she noticed Pinkie Pie was chatting with Fluttershy about something.
"Good morning Twilight," Pinkie Pie greeted her from behind the counter.
"Good morning Pinkie Pie, Good morning, Fluttershy." She replied.
"Come sit up at the counter, Pinkie Pie and I were just talking."
"Really?" The unicorn's curiosity was piqued as she sat on the stool next to the pegasus. "What about?"
"Well, you know how my Pinkie Sense told me the Comet was going to appear at Froggy Bottom Bog and you didn't believe it?"
"You mean where specifically explained how improbable it was?" Twilight said warily. She was hoping not to have a repeat of yesterday.
"Tell her Fluttershy," Pinkie said.
"Well, I'd taken some frogs over to Froggy Bottom Bog, because the pond had gotten so populated. I was letting out of my cart and was watching them hop to their new home when suddenly this enormous hydra rose out of the water."
"A hydra!" Twilight's face went white with shock. She had no idea one of her best friends had had a close brush with one of the most dangerous creatures in all of Equestria. She threw her hooves around Fluttershy and hugged her tight. "Thank Celestia, you're okay. If something had happened to you, I don't know what I would do. How did you escape?"
"Well," Fluttershy continued. "I almost didn't." Twilight was on the edge of her seat. "I was so scared I couldn't move. I couldn't look up as the Hydra lunged for me. I heard somepony call my name and then suddenly the comet appeared out of nowhere and carried me to safety."
Twilight's relief turned to disbelief. "What! When did this happen?"
"Yesterday afternoon around 2:30. It all happened so fast, one moment I was being carried through the sky. The next it set me down outside my cottage and flew off again."
Twilight's eyes began twitching. Her hooves shook violently with rage.
"Rrrgh...
"Um, Twilight are you okay?" Fluttershy asked scooching back on her seat.
"RrrARRRRRGGH!" In an instant, the unicorn's mane and tail burst into flames. Her coat turned white and her eyes glowed red as she realized the opportunity she'd let slip through her hooves. Thinking fast, Pinkie Pie grabbed a fire extinguisher from under the counter and doused her friend before the fire could spread to the rest of the bakery.
"BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP!" As the smoke alarm sounded off a defeated and extinguished Twilight fell from her scorched stool.
"Ugh, I give up."
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I am very torn on my opinion on Mr. Tyson. He has done some good work but how he handled the whole Pluto fiasco just rubbed me the wrong way.
Some the other great question of the universe. Why are people born? Why do they die? Why do they spend so much of the intervening time wearing digital watches?
Excellent work on this latest chapter. The exchanges, characterizations, humor, action and future chapter set-up are all wonderfully done in all the right places. I particularly liked Comet's fancolt geek outs, Comet saving Tycho (as well as Twilight THINKING she was saving Comet, but unknowingly saving the secret of his invulnerability), the Spider-Man Shout Out, the reason there was no "Pinkie Sense" reaction to "the red Comet's actions" before, the efforts Comet went to in order to keep Tycho and Twilight from outing him and Comet saving Fluttershy.
All in all, this chapter was definitely well worth the wait and I will definitely be looking forward to more of this.
Up in the sky! Look!
This is actually more satisfying than it sounds, because it means that as far as anyone is concerned, Diamond Tiara never had a Cutecenera. In other words, Spoiled Rich has all that money (her husband's money), and yet she wasn't willing to give her own daughter a Cutecenera party? What next? Is she gonna cancel her daughter's birthday party as well just to have extra money to go to the spa with? Maybe when Diamond is older and has a job of her own, Spoiled will start taking that income saying that it's rightfully hers... I think I watch too much Reddit.
You know, that comment about Reddit was supposed to be a joke.
No matter how obvious it may be, as long as she doesn't name names, she still legally has plausible deniability.
Just hope that Granny Smith doesn't think to invest in a Koltronite paddle. Also, what did Granny Smith expect would happen after everything she's experienced so far with Comet? That paddle was clearly gonna break before Comet would. I'm more surprised that Granny was strong enough to break the paddle in one swing.
I like how this was able to keep the spirit of the original episode intact, but was able to make it different as well. Aside from the inclusion of Neils Grasse Tycho, I liked how despite the frustration over the Pinkie Sense, Twilight's focus was on the Red Comet of Ponyville and solving that mystery. And at the end where Twilight has that moment, I like that it's not just that the Pinkie Sense was right, but also that she missed her chance to see the Red Comet. And after reading the beginning of the next chapter, I like how seamless the transition feels.