Fine Crime has been chosen by Celestia personally to undertake a job he has never wanted. Yet obvious curses can be hidden blessings, for Fine realizes his job is more than just to serve Celestia. He must find a way... to end her.
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Out of every story I've read with an "evil Celestia", this is by far the best and most dastardly. Keep it up!
I need to go hug a puppy now, lol. xD
I knew this was coming. I wonder if your going to write this story all the way till Fine Crime meets his end. I would love to read his inner thoughts during the entire Trixe V.S. Equestria event. There are 3 scenes I really would be curious to know what he was thinking.
>>
Do my best!
6114498
Might wanna keep that puppy on hand for the rest of the story. Just saying.
6114716
Check the diary entry of Chapter 1. Foreshadowing much.
I'm guessing you're thinking of... A) Of Amethyst and Twilight, B) right after the second fight with Nightmare Moon, and C) his fight with Trixie.
6114842
Actually I'm more curious in the events when he begins to see Trixie as possibility to safe Equestria. Especially the scenes where he gives her the note of the guard schedule and reveals his crime to Amethyst to her and I always wondered when he saw the dead body of Princess Twilight what went through his mind.
Dang, it was awful even just reading about poor innocent Sunset Shimmer. Then everything that came after that was just worse. I hope you've got your own happy thing to pick you up after writing these; it's hard enough to read them. (Not to disrespect the story, of course)
6115038
Truth be told – and knowing my soul is consigned to Hell for this – I need no extra happy stuff to make this easier. The story itself makes me happy, because the story is finally being told. The events may be horrid, but the fact that the truth is coming out pleases me.
I've been waiting a long time to tell this story.
Sorry for the delay I posting this comment. I got so bored halfway through that I had to stop.
It's nice in a way, not being apart of the artistic process. I just get to enjoy the chapters as they come.
I always thought that Amerhyst’s hatred towards Celestia and the archons was more personal. So the fact that this all happened when she was but a foal surprises me.
But I am looking forward to seeing what Fine Crime’s “other” duties will be.
6115175
Better to get it out there, I agree. And I can definitely appreciate it on a craftsmanship level. The /content/ on the other hand, can take some time to settle in.
6115495
Oh, it's still personal, and a later character's background will prove it. I did have an intense internal debate about how old she would be, but decided that certain future events would benefit from this approach.
We've got one more major character's history to reveal in this 'book,' then it's all Fine Crime for another three chapters.
I presume the BE is supposed to be placed there? I'm not sure how that slipped through, I must be slacking too much...
Either way, the chapter is amazingly done, no outstanding problems that I can see save for error posted above. Now to wait till Chapter 4 is written.
6115956
What the heck makes you think that's an error? There's absolutely nothing wrong with it. When Sunset gets to the day she faces Celestia's test, it would probably be the worst day of her life.
6115956
Also, chapter 4's already on GDocs. Did you miss the announcement five/six days ago on Skype?
The be is missin in the actual paragraph. I guess I didn't make that clear enough, sorry about that
6117190
Ooooooooooh. Okay then. Shall fix.
Love reading backstories of minor characters. I've seen Star's past and now, I'm hoping to see what happens to her after the events of TvE.
Eugh. Shivers down me spine.
Roll credits