• Published 30th Apr 2015
  • 2,617 Views, 92 Comments

Equestria Discord - Epicdiscord214



You know about the story of a human Twilight Sparkle. How about a human Discord?

  • ...
2
 92
 2,617

Discord vs the Dazzlings

The Dazzlings stood by the lockers slouching in disappointment. Sonata Dusk approached her sisters with a bag of tacos in her hand and offered it to them.

"Tacos?" she asked.

"You went to get tacos in a time like this?!" Adagio Dazzle asked violently.

"I went as quickly as I could." Sonata replied. "This is called fast food for a reason."

"Idiot." Aria rolled her eyes.

"Look, we're all riled up after the Battle of the Bands." Adagio said. "Thanks to the Rainbooms, we're no longer magic and we can't even sing in the right key."

"We should do something." Sonata said.

"Oh, you think," Aria asked sarcastically, "Because I was going to suggest we take dancing lessons instead."

"Quit your complaining." Adagio growled. "Oh, if only we had our jewel pieces with us. We could repair them with the little magic we have left. However, the Rainbooms have them on them 24/7."

"Not now." Sonata said. That got her sisters' attention. "They gave the shards to that new, strange Discord guy."

"What?" Adagio gasped. "How do you know that?"

"I heard it through a grapevine." Sonata said. "And by grapevine, I mean wall. I was in the room next to them. I overheard."

"Of course!" Adagio cheered. "Girls... I've just had a sudden realization. A growing solution. An epiphany."

"A puffy what?" Sonata asked.

"This is the opportunity we need." Adagio said. "We couldn't take the shards from the Rainbooms because we were outnumbered. Now, it'll be three against one. We're getting our shards back."

Discord knocked on the computer lab door. A boy about his age opened it and observed him.

"Hey, how are you doing?" Discord greeted. "Name's Discord."

"I know who you are." the boy said. "Trust me, after the cafeteria, you're not that easy to forget. Name's Ricky."

"Ah, the president of the Computer Club." Discord greeted. "Yeah, I need the lab to administer my name for my campaign. If you don't mind..."

Ricky sighed and opened the door for him. Discord stepped in and saw four other kids working on the computers.

"Meet the Computer Club." Ricky said. "That guy there is Terry. Whenever a computer breaks down, he's the guy to make the repairs."

"You let that creep in?" Terry gasped. "Oh, this is going to end really bad for us. Forget Ricky; your name should be Risky."

"Very clever, Terry." Ricky said sarcastically. "The next guy is Marty, our power expert. He knows about wiring, power savings, and whether or not a light is broken or not indicating the computer's on. Dusk here is our website expert. He'll know what each site has games, info, and most of all, viruses."

"I found one!" Dusk shouted pointing at Discord.

"Ha, ha." Discord said. He saw a busy guy with his eyes fixed on the screen. "What about that guy? What's he do?"

"Joe?" Ricky asked. "He works on game design."

"That's right." Joe said. "I'm currently working on a game of Pong that you can play in 3D. I just have one problem."

"What's that?" Discord asked.

"I don't know the first thing about Pong." Joe said.

"Hold on." Discord said. "If Joe's the game-guy, Terry's a computer doctor, Marty's the wire-nerd, and Aaron's the web-designer, who are you supposed to be?"

"As president, I have a very important job." Ricky said holding up a computer drive.

"That's it?" Discord chuckled. "A flash drive?" He swiped it out of Ricky's hand and threw it up and down leaving Ricky panicking. "Hate to break it to you, but they've already been invented. Watch this." The drive began to emit a great amount of light. "Look! It's glowing!"

"GIVE THAT BACK!" Ricky shouted taking the drive back. "This drive holds Devastator, the next stage in virus-protection. It's meant to detect viruses and exterminate them."

"Uh, uh, uh." Masque said. "You mean, devastate. That's why we call it Devastator."

"Still, it's taken me all year to get this far." Ricky said. "I just hope you didn't contaminate it."

"That's all great and all, but I still need my online sign-in for being student body president." Discord said.

Ricky rolled his eyes and showed Discord the screen. He then ran him through completing the registration.

Snips and Snails stood at the vending machine placing their money in the slots and pushing the buttons. But before they could reach in and get their snacks, Starlight Glimmer cleared her thought loudly getting their attention.

"What are you boys doing?"

"Getting a snack." Snails said.

"What was the job I gave you?" Starlight Glimmer asked softly.

"Uh... find a way to get Discord kicked out?" Snips asked.

"That's right." Starlight replied sweetly. "Now, I have to ask..." Suddenly, Starlight shoved her arm to the two of them and pinned them to the vending machine, causing most of the snacks to fall off their shelves. "WHY AREN'T YOU TAILING DISCORD RIGHT NOW?!"

"We thought we had plenty of time!" Snails panicked.

"Yeah!" Snips panicked as well. "After all, the election isn't until next Monday after school! I hear they're gonna finish a giant TV screen and hang it on the gym wall."

"Well, guess what." Starlight said. "You don't have plenty of time! I'm giving you until Friday to find something against him or I'll hang you on the wall!" She let the two go and trotted away.

"All right." Snips said. "You heard her, Snails. We need some way to get rid of him."

"You're quite right, Snips." Snails agreed. "And if we don't, Starlight's going to have our hides."

Meanwhile, in the computer lab, Discord just finished his online registration.

"Congratulations." Joe said. "You're officially running for class president."

"You know, I'm surprised Principle Celestia even gave you permission to run." Ricky said. "After what we saw in the cafeteria, that should be her last choice."

"What can I say?" Discord asked. "I have that magnetic charm."

"I know." a girl's voice called. They turned and the leader of the Dazzlings was standing there big as life. The sight of her frightened the whole club.

"ADAGIO!" Ricky gasped.

"DAZZLE!" Terry gasped.

"DAZZLING!" Aaron gasped.

"SIREN!" Marty gasped.

"BIG HAIR!" Joe gasped. Everyone looked at him. "Sorry. I thought we were doing a thing."

"You have something of mine, Discord." Adagio said. "Hand it over."

"What?" Discord asked. "Could you say that again?"

"I said, let me have it!" Adagio shouted.

Suddenly, Discord pulled out a giant ball and threw it at Adagio. She got pushed to the wall by it. Discord turned to the club.

"Thanks for the help." Discord said quickly. "I appreciate what you did for me. See ya', friends." He turned and ran.

"Did he just call us friends?" Marty asked.

Discord ran out of the door, but Adagio removed the ball off of her and got back up in front of him.

"I'm gonna have to see your hall pass." she joked.

Discord smiled nervously. Suddenly, he zipped out so fast, he left a cloud the shape of him. The cloud yelped and ran following his creator.

"You can run, but you can't hide!" Adagio called out.

Discord ran from one hallway to another. Suddenly, in front of the music room door, Sonata Dusk was waiting.

"Gotcha." Sonata said. "What do you have to say now?"

"I'm over there." Discord answered pointing behind her.

Sonata was actually dumb enough to look. She was still looking even though there was only a bunch of lockers there. While she was scratching her scalp, Discord snuck in the music room and closed the door behind him. He grabbed a broom and stuck it through the door handles. He heard Aria Blaze approaching the door and trying to open it, but the broom prevented her from getting any further. However, Discord knew the broom couldn't hold for long.

"Can I help you?" a male voice said.

Discord looked and saw a blue-haired guitarist standing at the patio. It was Flash Sentry. Discord then saw the electric guitar Flash was holding. He followed the plug to a large stereo. A lit light-bulb materialized above Discord's head and he smiled.

"Actually, you can." he answered.

A few minutes later, the broom broke and Aria broke through the door. She was shocked to see Flash Sentry in front of a large set of stereo. There were more of them than usual. Discord snapped his fingers and all the levers and knobs have been set to their highest level.

"NOW!" Discord shouted.

Flash Sentry raised his hand and strummed his strings strongly. The sound escaped the stereo and it was extremely loud. The noise blew and pushed Aria back. Eventually, she was thrown off the ground and hit the wall violently. It was then that the sound ended. Discord removed a set of fluffy earmuffs and turned to Flash.

"Thank you for your help." Discord said. He pulled out a 10-dollar bill and placed it in his hand. "Here. Stick this in your piggy-bank."

Discord quickly ran out and turned left. After a few turns, he made it to the kitchen. He saw Granny Smith carry a large barrel full of apples and leave it there. Discord opened it up and stuffed himself in it. His feet phased through the barrel floor and sneaked toward the door. Then, the top opened up and Adagio was above her grinning.

"Any last words?" she asked.

Discord looked at the apples around him and had an idea. He turned back up to the Dazzling.

"Applecore."

Confused, Adagio still played along. "Baltimore."

"Who's your friend?" Discord asked.

"ME!" Adagio shouted.

Suddenly, without warning, all the apples shot out of the barrel and hit Adagio to the wall. Discord surfed the apples until he jumped to the wall. He curtseyed his enemy and walked away.

"Ha, ha, ha!" Discord laughed. "She actually fell for it. And the best part, the red shards are still..." He patted his pocket, but felt something was wrong. He reached into his pocket and pulled it inside out. There was nothing in there but a moth that flew out. He gulped. "Uh, oh."

Back at the kitchen, Adagio Dazzle got back up and growled.

"When I get my hands on him I'll..." She stopped when she saw a red sparkle. She picked up a handful of broken, red jems and smiled. "Well, well, well. Looks like the shoe is on the other foot."

Author's Note:

This does not look good.

I've been meaning to give the Computer Club a song, but I couldn't find anything to template it on. If anyone has any ideas, I'm open for suggestions.