Wayward Hearts

by SilverTopHat

Chapter 9 How Can You Measure What You Can't Hold?

Chapter 9
How Can You Measure What You Can't Hold?

“This isn't the void I know.” I remarked as I wandered through catacomb after catacomb with large glittery fireflies that lacked wings but threw pale yellow light off their butts. Instead they seemed content to line themselves along the walls and act like torches slowly licking the dew off the stone walls. The air was stale and spent as if the wind hadn't visited this realm for a long time. Upon closer inspection the “fireflies” looked more like bloated slugs with stubby legs.

“Blech! Where am I?” I thought sticking my tongue out in disgust. The floor was smooth and clean unlike the walls that surrounded me. I kept walking through the dimly lit tunnels when I heard a faint buzzing tickling my ears. I followed the buzzing to a archway in the maze-like tunnels and poked my head in. I saw a tiny changeling looking around in panic buzzing its wings in distress as a tan pony just as small as it was lay unmoving at its hooves.

“Why did he stop moving mom! Why won't he get up!” The small changeling cried to a changeling standing off to the side with a smile on her lips.

“Don't worry, dear, he's just sleepy. You did very well on your first try. Momma's so proud of you.” The mother walked over and nuzzled the crying changeling. Something struck me as the small changeling looked up pain in her eyes at her mother.

It was Glitterlamp.

But how I came to know this tiny fact was a mystery, just like how they hadn't seen me yet. I'm not exactly hiding or anything but I stepped into the room anyway and I was painfully aware of my hand death-gripping the handle of my sword as the crystal eye twitched around the room curiously.

“But mom,” Glitterlamp sobbed. “He just fell over! You said it wouldn't hurt him!” She then pushed herself away from her mothers embrace. “So why won't he wake up! We were supposed to play hide `n seek next!” Her mother just shook her head and looked at the prone pony with the same look I'd give to an insect.

“He's just sleepy,” she insisted gently. “Look, he's still breathing but I'm afraid it's his bedtime. I'll take him home, K?” Glitterlamp's mother scooped up the small pony with her magic, planting a kiss of Glitterlamp's worried head and walked out of the room. I walked over to Glitterlamp and she still couldn't see me. Her head shot up suddenly and ran from the room calling after her mother.

“Wait up! I wanna walk him home too!”

I was left alone in the messy toy room trying to understand what just happened. First off I must have time traveled because Glitterlamp is a kid again. Second, who was that little guy? And is he hurt? I didn't get to see if he was really breathing or not! With purpose fueling my steps I followed after them through the archway. When I stepped only halfway through I felt twisted and stretched like a piece of taffy being pulled, I was expanding outward as well as being crushed into a small ball. The sensations stopped when I was standing in an open field where Glitterlamp was a bit older eating a picnic with a tan pony with short choppy black mane. Whether this was the same pony as before or a different one I had no idea.

“This is the best day of my life!” Glitterlamp's voice cheered gleefully in my mind.

“Ah! What!” I cried out looking around for the source of the foreign voice. It sounded close like within my own head. “What is going on!” Despite my loud outburst the duo didn't hear me. The tan pony handed Glitterlamp a heart shaped letter with white lace at the sides and I knew that he must have worked hard on that little card.

“Would you be my special somepony for Hearts `n Hooves day?” he asked bashfully.

“Omygosh! He's asking me! Me!” Glitterlamp's voice squealed in my head bursting with happiness. “Yes! Yes, I will!” She answered joyfully and tackled him into the wild flowers in a fierce hug. I walked the short distance swiftly to get a better look. The tan pony was snuggling a chestnut mare with a wavy blond mane and yet I knew it was Glitterlamp. I reached out to touch them and Glitterlamp jumped up and ran right through me, like I was a ghost! I stumbled back shocked and slipped over my own feet falling on my butt. My chest tingled like it had charge of electricity go through me with Glitterlamp.

“I need to go get ready then! See you tomorrow Fritter!” Glitterlamp called over her shoulder as she kicked off the ground and unfurled her feathery wings to catch the wind.

The feelings of such joy and happiness! I felt like crying in joy!

“Wait! Are these HER feelings!?” I thought suddenly. Fritter just sat with a smile on his face and did a silent victory pump. And yet beneath all the cheer and happiness, I felt an intense sadness and fear. Sad that she couldn't tell him who she really was and fear of what he'd do, even though he's been nothing but kindness incarnate, if he did find out. Fritter stood up with a dreamy look on his face and started to pick up the picnic. A shadow passed over me and I fell downward into darkness.

The next thing I knew it was raining and it cold not just on my skin but also in my heart. I was in a town I didn't recognize but there was a parade going through the streets, no wait. Everypony was frowning and being miserable by what I could see. The only things that had color was a disc of bronze in the shape of a rising dawn being carried by two ponies in front on poles. Everypony was crying and a long rectangle was being carried with flowers on top.

“No,” I thought realization dawning on me. “I'm at a funeral procession.” I found Glitterlamp, a little bit older than before, following the casket and I couldn't tell if she was crying or it was the rain sliding across her face but her expression was as blank as stone. And yet I felt intense sorrow from her enough to make even the stone weep but felt like the sky was crying enough for both of them. I followed in hushed silence next to her since this was her memory and not mine but a piece of me was still curious on how this plays out.

An old stallion stood next to the grave with a sombre expression on his face as the casket was lowered down into the open grave.

“Dearly beloved,” he began his voice wizened by age with eyes nothing short of grandfatherly. “We have been gathered here today in remembrance of Fritter Stacks. Loved son, brother, and a friend to all.” He looked at each of the family members assembled there. I scanned the faces surrounding me and in a split moment I saw my family in their place! I shook my head to banish the thought but it persisted just hanging over my head waiting to strike.

“Wait did he say Stacks? Whoa, Short Stacks has more wounds than I thought.” I mused in wonder. Then in the front row I saw them, the Stacks family but the two that stood out the most was Sapphire Hoof and who I think is Short Stacks! “There is nopony to blame for the runaway wagon that struck the fatal blow against our young friend.” Sorrow gave way to anger as a picture of somepony I didn't recognize flashed through my mind, probably the owner of the cart. The old stallion began saying the burial rites but Glitterlamp slunk away from the crowd feeling worse than usual.

Hurt, pain, sorrow and hate poured off of her while I followed her through town and a lone figure underneath an umbrella stood in the middle of the road and greeted her coldly.

“Hello, dear,” her voice pierced the dull roar of rain easily. “I told you not to get attached.” The disguise was of an elegant unicorn and the voice did not match the face. “It only brings pain, I warned you.” Her voice sounded sincere but it was the eyes that betrayed her real feelings. The eyes lacked the dull sorrow nor did tears stain her cheeks but held quite the opposite and rage boiled up within Glitterlamp.

“Don't talk to me.” She growled too tired and depressed to really argue. “I don't want to see anypony for a while.” Glitterlamp's mother walked forward to embrace her daughter with a detached look.

“It's just as well, he knew too much anyway.” She said coldly shattering the tender quite moment and flung it into abstract color and shapes but the emotions were sharper than ever. My eyes felt like someone rubbed glass dust into them and when everything came back into focus they stood facing each other with magic blasting from both sides with Glitterlamp screaming in rage.

“You did it!” She screamed between magic blasts ripping apart stone and wood alike. “You killed him didn't you!”

“Did you wear that face long enough to forget what you really look like!” Her mother hissed back sending another ball of magic burning through the rain. “I was doing what was right for you!”

“I was HAPPY! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!” Glitterlamp broke down, sending a wall of magic spears hurtling towards her mother and I fell into darkness again.

I was walking through the dimly lit tunnels again and found many doors. Some were flimsy and weak with holes large enough I could see memories from the cracks while others were solid and well crafted.

“Ah, this must be the seat of her memories.” I observed passing by several doors without much interest. A door stood out from the rest a large door made of metal and guarded with a large iron lock. I peeked through the keyhole to see Fritter galloping through a rain of red paper hearts. I stepped back and regarded the door.

“This must be her memory of the Hearts `n Hooves Day date. I'll not invade this one.” I thought feeling a little filthy because I was lurking around someones head and memories like a thief. “I wish I can wake up from this. To at least hold privacy sacred.” I thought guiltily. I walked around avoiding any doors or archways at this point not wanting to intrude any further. I passed open archways and doors trying to resist the temptation to violate her memories any further. I heard faint crying from down within an archway and I took care to poke only my head in and not my whole body. The floor only continued only for a short distance and then stopped at a wall of dull obsidian. Or was it even a wall?

I lifted my hand to the wall and the wall bowed out like metal to a magnet to touch me. I stepped into the darkness and all feeling drained from my body and the deafening silence was quieted as I stepped forward into my void. It didn't feel as friendly ever since my last dream but I saw Glitterlamp, just as I remember her now, frantically stomping around opening her mouth to yell but nothing came out. The image of her mother stood over her scolding her for something with little Fritter at her feet unconscious. I was floating above her and I could feel that she wasn't pleased to see her mother. I raised an accusing finger and her image shattered into a million piece. I waved my hand over the small form and it ceased to exist. Glitterlamp looked around nervously, magic at the ready and began to walk around.

“Heh, you think there's a floor here.” I thought with a smile as I was at least in my mind again. “Even with wings you still think you have to walk.” I drifted slowly down to her my feet touching nothing. Glitterlamp snapped her head to attention and looked at me with wide eyes and she called out to me soundlessly. I glided down to where she was and was surprised when my feet did touch something solid.

“Hmm, would you look at that,” I thought tapping my foot mutely against the stone floor. “There is a floor here, weird.” Glitterlamp started forward as I leaned back as if to sit in a couch and merely floated there, just watching. She was looking straight at me surprised with a look of relief on her face. I looked behind me half expecting to see Fritter come galloping up but all I saw was endless space.

“Wait, you can see me now?” I asked confused without moving my lips. Glitterlamp looked at me then at where used to be mother then back at me.

“Why can't I speak? And where did they go?” she mouthed bringing her hooves to her throat.

“You're in my head. Or at least I think you are. Everything here is dictated by thought and imagination.” Just to prove the point I struck the ground with me heel and a creek poured itself lazily into the distance. “Not just by what you see, so be careful of what you think of.” Suddenly pain jolted through my body as white bandages wrapped around my form just as wounds began to appear on me. I emitted a soul shaking scream as I hit the ground unable to move wreathed in agony.

My eyes snapped open sharply as the pain drove me from sleep. My head felt like it was squeezed through a funnel! Glitterlamp woke up too and scrambled away from me with confused wonder in her eyes.

“How did you do that!” She demanded.

“I don't know!” I growled back gripping my pounding head. “I don't know how or why I can do that!” I remembered the last time it happened, it was when Trixie slept that close to me. “I think you have to be close to me for it to happen.” I talked thinking aloud.

“So whenever I get close to you I'll end up back there!” Glitterlamp yelled. I tried to sit up but the same electric agony shot through my body.

“What did you see!?” I asked pleadingly through clenched teeth.

“Nothing! It was all nothing! I couldn't feel anything! Or hear! Or taste! And I had a nightmare on top of it all!” Then her eyes narrowed at me. “What did you see.” It wasn't a question, a low threatening demand if anything at all.

“Not all that much.” I said calmly nursing my headache. “It was really choppy and random I don't really know. I know Fritter Stacks asked you on a date on a holiday,” Glitterlamp kept a straight cold face and motioned for me to continue. “I think I saw his funeral, I know how much he meant to you and how you felt when he died. I'm sorry.” I still felt guilty that I invaded such private thoughts. A silence fell between us as we sized each other up. She turned her head sharply and trotted across the room. I lifted the blanket to get a better look at myself and saw that my leg that got bitten was in a homemade cast covered in bandages. The rest of me looked just like how I felt, dreadful. I looked over to Glitterlamp to see her looking at the painting that Sapphire drew of me and Trixie lost in thought.

“Does this happen often in your world.” She asked me flatly.

“None that I know of.” I answered still guilt ridden. Glitterlamp trotted over to the piece of paper that held the instructions and read it silently.

“Fried eggs?” She grimaced and looked to me with a 'ya gotta be kidding' expression.

“Unless you know of something better.” I said weakly suddenly just so very sore and tired. I couldn't really move and to top things off my legs started to itch. Hunger was the furthest from my mind. I closed my eyes to clear them of the gummy grime.

“Hey, it says here you're supposed to take these pills twice a day.” Glitterlamp said suddenly close to me.

“How did she?! Wasn't she across the room?” I opened my eyes and saw to brightly colored pills with a cup of water. “No,” I said adamantly. “I don't know if it'll work on me.” I said pushing the glass away with my only good arm.

“How do you know?” Glitterlamp asked annoyed.

“I'd rather not test it. Human biology and your biology may differ greatly.” I answered wearily.

“OK, here's the deal.” She put the pills and water in front of me. “I found where she hid her healing potions. If this doesn't work I'll give you one, K?” It was hard to focus on her words and her words sounded so reasonable. The prospect of drinking a healing potion did appeal to me, I just hope whatever the pill is doesn't kill me before then.

“Fine.” I surrendered and I downed the pills hesitantly.

I don't remember falling asleep but I was walking again through a hazy mist which drew the soreness away from me. A light lit my path but when I followed the source I found the sword within my hand. The sword. . . perhaps it's the reason I can delve into minds? The eye shown out like a flashlight dispelling the crushing darkness and filling the void with stars.

“I should name you,” I regarded the sword twisting it in my hands staring into the eye. “You've slain fear and have defended me more than once. But what to name you?” I walked around absorbed at my task. “You deserve a name perhaps shado- no.” I sighed inwardly. “You are a Bane, but a Bane to what?” I racked my mind for a name but nothing came to mind.

I jammed my toe into something sending white hot pain lashing up my leg. I looked down at the object that caused me pain. It was my dresser. I looked around suddenly and saw that I was in my room!

“I must be dreaming if I'm home.” I thought grimly looking around my room. The walls were bare save for a few lonesome nails that art used to hang on. Dirty clothes piled up in corners but never more than a sock or two. Boxes contained most of my belongings and it's been almost a year since we moved here but I never really got around to unpacking my things. Everything was as I left it but something was off. I walked into the living room expecting to see my big brother's T.V. playing some movie that was from his childhood but it wasn't. The room was devoid of the usual shabby furniture and shelves that would be lined from wall to wall with videos. All that sat there was a small round folding table with a small picture turned away from me with a couple of purple lilacs at the base of it.

“No, please let, let it be something else.” I felt compelled to turn the picture around and see it but I already knew who's face was on it. I must not have heard it before, I thought it was the creaking of the floor boards as I walked across the room but I can hear it plainly now. It was Fear-me's hoarse laughter faintly from the basement, or living room two we came to call it.

“My family,” and just as I thought of them, there they stood staring miserably at the photo. My Dad comforted my Mom, my big bro tried not to show it but he felt pain, my big sister cried openly into a tissue and my little bro couldn't even bare to look at my photo. The littlest of us all couldn't understand why everyone was crying.

“NO! Anything but this!” I fiercely thought of anything else. But the more I tried to ignore them the louder their crying became. I lunged at them trying to hug them screaming. “I'm here! I'm not dead! Just lost!” But I phased through them like a ghost rending my heart in twain. The laughing only intensified at my attempts at contacting my family. I ran out of the house and continued to run down the street but I couldn't get anywhere. I stopped tired and miserable and saw that every house on the block was my house. Pain boiled up within me tearing my crumbling body down to the ground because I could still hear them crying for me.

Then Glitterlamp stood over me and I was back within Sapphire's cottage. I was sweating heavily and I felt like I was going to catch on fire any second. The room shook violently and focusing on Glitterlamp was almost out of the question.

“Wh-what? Did, did something ha-happen?” I didn't even recognize the shaking raspy voice as my own at first.

“You were making a lot of noises in here and I come to check on you and you thrashing around begging somepony to stop crying.” Glitterlamp explained concern in her eyes. Glitterlamp towered over me and it wasn't until she was helping me off the floor did I realize that I fell off the couch. Everything ached! Pain was evenly distributed across my body and despite Glitterlamp levitating me back to the couch I still felt like an iron maiden was closing around me.

“How did you even end up on the floor?” she looked me over and then jammed a thermometer into my mouth when I was about to answer. I looked over the window but the curtains were drawn.

“What time is it?” I asked trying to regain my bearings.

“Still breakfast time. It should be done in a minute.” She gave me a once over to see if I did anything to mess with the stitching and casts and returned to the kitchen area. Had time even passed?

“Best avoid sleep if I'm going to have dreams like that.” I thought grimly. “At least for a while.”

My stomach felt like it had turned into clay, heavy and uncomfortable. All the curtains had been drawn to a close turning the usual cheerful clutter to a sad dark collection of forgotten projects. What little light that did sneak through the curtains stung my eyes and made them water. Time began to lose meaning to me as well as logic and order. Exhaustion gnawed on my eyes coaxing them to close if only for a moment. All my thoughts and the events of the last couple of days began to blur together to make a fruit smoothie of events and emotions. Textures never remained consistent not even the blanket that covered me felt like a sheet of rock from time to time, I thought I could hear my mom calling for me from somewhere in the house. Even the light tasted gritty only to sound smooth again the moment I noticed it. My tears turned into slimy syrup threatening to glue my eyes shut.

A plate was deposited on my chest snapping me back into focus.

“Here they are, hope I cooked them right.” Glitterlamp took the thermometer out of my mouth and looked at it skeptically. “Well, it says hundred-seventeen degrees on this. You'll be fine so eat up,” She assured me. “If you need me I'll be reading books over here.”

“Then I probably have a fever if it's that high.” I answered weakly. The eggs looked right but it tasted very bland. She found a group of books that interested her and wandered into the kitchen area. I only took a few bites of the tasteless food and set the rest on the floor. I Tried to get up to spite my groggy condition. I was ready for the pain now and it wasn't nearly as intense as it was before when I sat up. My legs weren't broken, or at least I don't think they are, it was the simple cast that restricted movement. Sitting up took more effort and energy than I thought but I felt a small amount of triumph for being able to sit up. I fell unceremoniously back into the pillow and promised myself to let my eyes rest for just a minute.

It was a mistake! All of it was a mistake! There was not a single thing here that didn't make me want to to crawl into a hole and hide! Despite the cheery fairyland appeal that this land held it has offered me nothing but pain and grief! Every life I've saved only adds to my suffering!! Every choice was wrong! All of them! I have not done a single thing right! All I've managed to do was land into a hospital and acquire scars aplenty! Not even in the most screwed up camping fiasco I never left with anything more than bruises! Images of my failures swam before my eyes taking their cheap shot against me as the Timbers and the Fear beasts loomed in the distance. Why did I have to leave my house at all! Everything could have been avoided if I just minded my own business!

“WHY!” I snarled at them. “Why does this happen to me! What have I done to deserve this!” My voice starting to gain volume and intensity with each word. “TELL ME!!” I roared when none of them answered. Rage and confusion pulsed through my veins as I drew the Bane out of nothingness and began to hack them all to pieces, my feet chewing the ground beneath me. The shadows persisted, twisting and writhing around me cackling at my vain attempts. I looked down at the blood slicked sword and realized I only gave it half a name.

“A bane . . .” I thought distantly. “A bane of FEAR!!” I roared thrusting it into the air and the blade came alive with energy. “I name you Fearbane! Slayer of shadows and evil forest sprites!” I proclaimed for all to hear. The sword seemed to acknowledge the name and the sword began to inscribe the name in silver lettering along the length of the blade. The golden tendrils emerged from my shoulders again and lashed all around getting brighter and brighter cloaking me inside its blinding light. Even though the light blinded me I still sneered at my foes lashing out in all directions.

I woke with something hard in my mouth and the taste of cherries in my mouth. I opened my eyes and saw a empty vial being raised away from me and a funnel removed itself from my mouth. A concerned Fear beast stood over me. Adrenaline still pumped through my veins, my skin itched uncontrollably and I tried to reach out to strangle the life out of it. It took a nimble step back to avoid my clumsy attempts.

“Just calm down! Let the potion do its work, just don't move.” Glitterlamp's voice escaped its lips. I welcomed the pain as I stood up staggering around like a drunk and searched for Fearbane amongst the cluttered chaos in the room.

Wait, what potion? I suddenly felt better as all my aches faded into numbness. Fear bane was next to the fire place glowing faintly. I pushed the Fear beast away and tripped over the cast that was still on my foot. The ground imparted a harsh slap to my face, already I could taste copper. The Beast jumped on my back pinning my arms to my sides.

“No! Stop! You'll just hurt yourself!” It pleaded with me. Even now I could feel the healing properties washing my pains and aches away with my returning strength. Instincts started to kick in as I struggled against my captor. My tension was at its breaking point making things seem so simple: get the Fearbane, kill the Fear beast. That's all there was in my eyes as I snapped my head back connecting with something solid making the beast recoil. I wriggled out of its grasp struggling to stand up, I slipped ramming my head into the side of the fire place hard enough to see stars. Something coiled around me like a snake and began to squeeze me.

“I will not end like this.” I cried out hysterically as the image of an over-sized python swallowing me alive crowded my vision. I thrashed around freeing an arm but I could feel the potions side effects kicking in after the rush of the potion wore off sapping my energy away from me. Or was it the python squeezing the life from me? I opened my mouth and bit the snake as hard as I could but only found a mouthful of cotton. Darkness crept around my eyes only to make my terror grow.

“If I sleep now, I die.” A cold fragment of logic informed me. The snake must have swallowed my head because the lights went out suddenly. I now thrashed around out of spite rather than survival I heard all sorts of things break and snap around me. Despair grew within me as I realized I was losing strength with every second as if a cup of sand was added to my body for every movement. I rocked my head forward to see if I could make this thing throw me up but hit bone as the world slipped away from my grasp.

I drifted within the star speckled space as tears rolled freely from my eyes because even in death I was still just so alone. Not even the breath of another to shatter the silence and every light was too far away to hear my screams. Only Fearbane drifted near me and its eye felt so accusing now with its unblinking, expectant stare. Soft spongy earth materialized underneath my feet as I threw the offending object to the ground and wept at the starry sky.

“I just wanna go home!” My voice pleaded to anything around me even without the aid of my mouth. “Who was wrong!” A stone pillar rose out of the earth just for me to sit on it. Little bits of rubble floated around in its own personal gravity as I gripped at the sides of my head trying to keep it from ripping in two. I crumbled down bringing my knees to my chest as I wept soundlessly into the starry space as all my actions added up to the ultimate failure: a meaningless death. And all I had left was Fearbane and a gaping hole to which my heart used to be. I closed my eyes and accepted my end.

A cool wet rag placed itself on my forehead as my eyes opened up to see Glitterlamp looking down at me with scrutiny.

“I know cornered animals can get pretty unpleasant but you are something else.” She said sternly. “I leave you alone for an hour and you're in here screaming your head off about mistakes and pain, so I have to go get a funnel because you kept snapping at me. And what do you do next?” she said angrily. “You start getting up, even more crazy yelling at me and breaking things. Just what kinda nightmare were you in?” Glitterlamp demanded. I tried to scratch my head but something kept it pinned to my side. I looked down making the rag fall down my face and saw that I had been wrapped inside a blanket, like a burrito. The room was a mess before but now the mess had broken objects and spilled paint cans everywhere in the living room.

“Are you listening to me or are you still going crazy!? I am talking to you!” The changeling thumped me in the chest to get my attention. I saw that her face was bruised and a trail of dried blood still streaked her nose and upper lip.

“I did that?” I thought painfully. I looked away but my heart felt a little heavier. “Nice going, moron.”

“Sorry.” Was all I could manage. What is it with these nightmares! I still felt tired and spent with my head pounding at each of Glitterlamp's words.

“Sorry, that's it?” Glitterlamp asked imperiously. “I had to convince the local ponies here that everything was under control and all you have to say is sorry?”

“I never asked you to stick around and take care of me! Did I!?” I snarled back at her. I sat up and wriggled out of the blanket and felt all the lumps that collected on my head. The casts came off during the struggle but they were no longer needed as my old wounds only came up as white scars. Glitterlamp took a few steps back and an emerald aura wrapped around her horn when I stood up.

“No, you didn't.” She said slowly. “But you helped me when I was hurt so now I'm helping you.” She didn't sound angry but definitely on edge. I felt light headed and fell back down to the couch and stared at the ceiling.

“What time is it?” I asked trying to regain my sense's

“At least I'm not dead but I'm still lost and alone.” I breathed a tired sigh in relief.

“You've been out for a day and it's about noon today.” The irritated changeling informed me.

“Damn, that long? I suppose it doesn't really matter.” I said rubbing my head. “About the other night, I wasn't seeing things clearly.”

“Really?! I had no idea!” Glitterlamp snapped at me sarcastically. The sudden rebuke hurt but it was not surprising. I just clenched my jaw and just sat there staring at where the sword used to be.

“She couldn't have moved it far.” I assured myself after looking around the cluttered room needing the security it offered.

The silence was almost tangible enough to choke on so I stood up and walked around trying to look for my sword while avoiding Glitterlamp. Glitterlamp had other plans as she followed me at a distance. I found Fearbane in the kitchen tucked away behind some umbrellas in a quite corner. I hadn't walked very far but I was breathing heavily like I just ran for a few miles.

“I guess just one potion wasn't enough to completely erase the damage.” I cringed as all my pain of last night only been diluted to a constant ache. I sat down with Fearbane in hand at the kitchen table when my stomach growled violently at me. I was hungry, I mean like it hurt! Despite my hunger I didn't want to talk to Glitterlamp but it wasn't because I was mad at her. Even though she was standing right there in the doorway watching me. Having Fearbane back in my hands made me feel more at ease. I got up and grabbed an apple to stave off the hunger pangs until I could fix something more substantial. The bruise on Glitterlamp's nose made me feel guilty and only reminded me on my constant failures.

“Look I'm sorry about what I did. I didn't mean to hurt you, I thought I was still in my nightmare.” I apologized still feeling awful about the whole ordeal and began to worry about my ability or discerning reality anymore. A chill crawled up my body as a thought crossed my mind. “Is this even real? Is anything truly real?”

Comments

[VinylScratch420]

Is anything real? Who am I? What is life? WHAT IS REALITY?