Chapter 14: Two Twins and a Handsome Fellow named Jack
Swords, Sorcery, and Shenanigans- Two Twins and a Handsome fellow named Jack
Originally, Anson liked the form of being an earth pony since Discord told him it was temporary. Unfortunately, the Chaos Spirit never really explained how long the “temporary” state was going to last. He found out this the hard way was when he woke up to having Nicko snap a photo of him in his ponified form five minutes before returning into his human form. Not one of his best moments if he would say so himself. But nevertheless, he didn’t really care about it once he had control of his arms and legs again.
“Good lord, that was some crazy trip.” He said as he tried to straighten his hair.
“Where did you even end up? Another Equestria?” Nicko asked him as he extended a hand and helped his twin brother up.
“Yeah, and you were right about your guess earlier. This snowflake is a token of another Displaced.” Anson replied. “His name is Jack Frost and he was quite a nice guy. We even played a prank on the Cutie Mark Crusaders.”
“Jack Frost?” Nicko repeated, having Anson nod his head. The Infinity Sword explained his encounters with the Snowboy and his time with them. Discord himself was also telling them how everything went and the times they had with the young boy. Meanwhile though, Eris noticed something while they were talking. An odd door appeared in the back of the room. One that wasn’t there before.
“Something seems off about what we just went through though.”
“What do you mean by off brother?”
“Well, throughout our time inside this creepy castle, we had been given test after test and both of us got Displaced on different accounts. What if me meeting Jack and you meeting Ryu was not just by chance, but also a test?”
“What would that have to prove though?”
The Infinity Sword shrugged as he looked at his brother. “Maybe to show how strong we are individually and we interact with one another. You had the training with Ryu and meeting the griffons while I had to fight the Cannon Cavalier and ran into Jack. That just can’t be a coincidence now, can it?”
Now that Nicko was thinking of it, Anson brought up some major points. Eric wouldn’t have wanted his research to be disrupted in any possible way, so he must’ve figured a way to bring up some tests for them. If they passed each of the tests that they were given, they would be allowed to enter the room he was in and faced them. But this also brought up another question. What other test could possibly be left? What other trials awaited them-?”
“Uhh guys, you might want to have a look at this.”
The voice came from Eris as she was pointing towards the door that she found earlier. This caught everypony’s attention immediately and had them rush on over to her current location. Opening the door, all four of them were greeted by a huge library that had shelves that were almost fifty feet high. Books were scattered everywhere and other objects were placed around the room that convinced the two twins that this was possibly some kind of personal study or research wing.
In the middle of it all laid a glowing purple cracked ingot crystal. On it’s pedestal, it felt warm when Nicko and Anson had their hands over it. Strangely, it reminded the two of them of some of the crystals they had seen Eric use before.
“You guys think this is some kind of trap?” Nicko asked them. “Eric’s Dynamo’s feast off of these kind of crystals for energy and power.”
“I’m not sure. I don’t feel the same magic signature like those usually give off. Normally, it’s the same feeling as the user.” Eris said, hiding herself inside Nicko’s body.
“I think it should be a safe bet if we destroy it. That way, we don’t have any future consequences.” Anson told Nicko. He nodded with him in agreement.
“Okay, while you do that, I’ll be out here… outside of the blast zone.” Discord joked a little as he left the room in an old western outfit, carrying a fake box of TNT for comical effect. Looking at each other, the twins smiled and snickered a little at Discords Joke.
“Okay, so how should we do this?”
“I think maybe one of my Runes can do the trick.” Nicko told his brother as he charged a small to medium sized rune inside his hand. Positioning his hands in front of him and putting his sword on his back, he used his two thumbs and index fingers like a sight and blasted the rune. It’s impact with the Crystal though unleashed a Violent flash of light that would give somepony a seizure. The light felt like it was burning their skin as the two brothers were consumed by the Multi-colored flash.
Seconds later, Discord opened the door rapidly to find the room empty and broken crystal shards scattered all over the floor. The Chaos spirit now had a real bad feeling and worried for the safety of not just the twins, but also his daughter.
Meanwhile…
The Crystal Empire - Crystal Palace - Evening
*Handsome Jack Perspective, First Person*
Handsome Jack… CEO of the Hyperion Corporation, at least since the first second being to this universe… The name was music to my ears still, if egotistical, also compensating since that day... Despite the numerous titles I had acquired over the years, the sound of my own name was one thing that I have always liked. On some days, its the reason why I ever actually get up in the morning, with besides what things can be done for those whom rely on me. But as it turns out for me, today was not going to be like any other ‘normal’ day, yet AGAIN for me. Especially for what was to happen on today’s busy agenda.
Today did NOT get off to a good start, minus possible glitch in the moon shot’s aim and dealing with a ‘Displaced’, my nerves were still recovering from that vault hunter attack, even though Asphyxious said they weren’t. The complex and often bloody process of ‘fixing’ a legitimate heir back onto the Crystal Throne, with me being the rightful ruler Princess Glitterstone’s champion. Had me personally gunning down three challengers to her claim before the others knew I wasn’t going to hold back, also my actions assured my reinstatement of ‘Duke’. The whole time after was reintroducing myself to the crystal citizens, which happily happened today instead of later tomorrow.
Which means I will have to prepare for the Equestrian royal ‘come f*ck me over’ committee would arrive, but it’s moments righting a wrong that I missed out on so long ago started to mend inside of me seeing a smiling mother. Princess or not with her foal wrapped safely in her embrace on the throne that brings me warmth, it was funny how I am well previously ‘unofficial’ uncle to her only for her to write a actual decree as her first action besides naming me, of all living beings, her foal’s godfather. ‘Damnit why can’t I cry like I use to at sappy moments? Maybe it was the scarring from that day since then I couldn’t cry, I started to hear f*cking whispers in my head. Top it all off some inky twisted f*cker up in the sky, when I do hear whispering it is never anything coherent, like it’s lost in translation but I get the feeling behind it.’
Taking my eyes away from the sight before me to the angel bots I had specifically put in the room, to protect what’s left of the royal family from harm. Even the badass I had along with me earlier will be stationed as their personal guard over the unit. “Hey F.A.U.S.T., how is the progress on the reorganization of nobility and documentation for royal presentation going? Because once things start rolling, I do not want poor Glitter here to be washed away by the overwhelming transition by everything, so maybe some assistants would keep things orderly. Also did you get those foalsitting directories set up for Princess Pandora yet?” I said pointedly so that my Possibly fully Sentient AI will be using the ‘training wheels’ on her.
F.A.U.S.T. (Foresight, Automation, Utilities, System, and Tactics) or more accurately one of her robotic units, was waiting for me to finish with that weird smile that tickles the back of my neck like a caress. “Everything is on task at this time, though the Facility itself is undergoing an intense screening, to be sure of no negative influences present from surface structures to below ground structures. As for the last task, ashamedly we will have to use reference guides and advice to ‘modernize’ our current directory on the subject. But for now though Jack thou should take rest to comfort thou mind.”
The Crystal Empire - Hyperion Crystal Branch
*Doppelganger Jack’s View/Perceptions*
The building and grounds were intact as the shield barrier held out for the most part that kept anyone else, off the property but the issue was it seemed is that the workers who were inside when the empire got took over had to get out eventually. So right now we are just doing a top to bottom check over of the place to see if anything was tampered with, even full inventories of the place is going to take time since most of it is underground and connects up at some points to the crystal mines.
The actual employees were luckily all accounted for and are on paid leave, so they can relax at their homes or even take it at a hospital, even though the Real Jack had to force a few of them to go and rest. Loyalty is in it’s spades here in the empire as well as tradition even though Hyperion is paving the way to a cleaner, brighter, orderly future and fixing mistakes. from when the empire suffered a hostile take over, to returning and being subjugated again under a foreign power this time was quite hard on them.
The Expression on the doppelganger ‘Jack’s’ tired face was what viewed and responded cycling through different either active, or inactive feeds to be fixed giving answers the repair robots question as he uncomfortably sat in his chair. He was going to ask about what was on the “To-do” list besides this, but the sounds of an unusual beeping filled the security room. The response to a active magic sensor array having been set up as an early alert system against magic users or events. A familiar holographic view of F.A.U.S.T. immediately began to try and see what was the cause of this unknown commotion. “Metal Will, thou may want to investigate this. If it is a indeed threat, thou are to shoot. Jack requires time to rest.”
Before I could say anything, the screen showed a recent scan of the region and a recent reaction shown on the screen that could only come from the explosive reaction that occurred when magic made contact with the Created ultra rare magical crystal mineral named Eridium. The last time that this happened over a thousand years ago when Celestia let loose a powerful blast of magic on a Hyperion facility in the town of Filliglade.
“These two are radiating high traces of magic mixed with the energy that is found inside a standard chunk of Eridium. The readings were picking up from them resemble the strength of one of the princesses. Their current location is a few miles away from the Crystal Empire.”
A gruff chuckle comes over the line as Metal Will responded. “Well I will be sure to hunt the two targets to confirm, if nothing else I will finally get a excellent fight. I’ll be sure to bring along support to not make any mistakes.” He finished with a dry chuckle with the sound of mags being cluttered into a bag and grenades.
Crystal Empire- Terrain
*Back to the Twins*
When Nicko opened his eyes again, he was greeted to the sight of snowy mountains and his brother with his face buried in the snow. He had no idea where they were, but something made him feel like it was the beginning of Borderlands 2. Where you’re crawling in the snow and you hear ClapTrap tell you that “Learning how to crawl will be the first step in Handsome Jack’s downfall!” Oh the memories of what he actually liked back home at the orphanage.
When Anson pulled himself out of the snow, some of it still remained on his face and made it look like he got a beard like Santa Claus. He wiped the snow off of his chin and then turned to his brother, who offered him a hand to help get him on his feet. “Thanks.”
“No problem, brother.” Nicko commented. “Do you have any idea on where we possibly are though?”
“Not quite. But something tells me we both got Displaced… Again.”
“Thats like… How many times now?”
“Twice.”
“Yeah and this sh*t is getting pretty old… Fast.” The Rune Slayer groaned. “Well, it’s not like these things come with a warning.”
“You got that right… Hey, Where’s Eris?” The Infinity Sword asked. Seconds after asking though, the Chaos Spirit reappeared next to the two brothers and held something in her eagle talon.
“Right here. Though, you two might want to have a look at this.”
The Draconequus handed the piece of paper that she was holding to Nicko. Upon looking at it, his eyes widened and he mentally cursed inside his head. He thought that what he thought earlier involving the intro to Borderlands 2 basically jinxed them.
“Uh guys… I don’t think we’re in Equestria anymore.” The Rune Slayer commented as he handed the flyer to his brother. He too, was personally surprised by what kind of situation they were in. Something told him though that they would have company coming real soon as he saw something get launched from the sky and was barreling towards their location at high speeds. Both brothers jumped out of the way and Eris returned to Nicko’s body as Ice and Smoke began to pick up from whatever crash landed right in front of them.
“Why hello there.”
The smoke cleared up to show a few “Loader Bots” a few feet away from them as they saw a new person- Crystal Pony with robotic enhancements speaking to them, both brothers were still confused by what was going on.
“Uh… Hi?”
“You two colts seem… New here. The name’s Metal Will… Hyperion’s GREATEST Cyborg Pony fighter, on this entire planet.”
‘Oh great… An egotistical Jackass.’ Eris said inside Nicko’s head briefly.
“What are your names, colts?” The pony asked the two twins, eagerly waiting for a reply from them. The Rune Slayer and the Infinity Sword were a bit tense. Mostly because of the fact that the Loader Bots that were with him were locked, loaded, and pointed right at them. It felt more like a holdup than an actual conversation.
“We’ll tell you our names if you tell your mechs to lower their weapons.”
“My… Oh my. Let me remind you two that you two are in no position to try and negotiate with me. You are in my territory now. The Crystal Empire Branch of the Hyperion Corporation. Where being a Vault Hunter is punishable offence by death, also verbally speaking in favor of them anywhere here is considered supporting criminal scum……”
‘Well, that just escalated quickly.’ Eris muttered again.
“I’m Nicko and this is my brother, Anson.” The Rune Slayer calmly replied, hoping to ease the current tension between the well prepared Pony ‘Metal Will’ and the two siblings. Eris though, felt that something was off with this stallion. He seemed like he was hiding something. Not to mention a complete and utter psychopath that reminded her of her father back before he was reformed.
“I see. Well, then… What brought you colts to this exact spot?”
“Here?”
His eyes narrowed as he gruffly spoke up again commandingly. “Why yes, what the f*ck else would I be talking about? Because if you are Vault Hunters, I have a very simple solution for the both of you.” His weapon cocked in an armed position as the rifle he held also had a blade on the underside. With a very familiar pistol on his belt, the silence was likely working thoughts that they were not just two ‘colts’ by his view, but Vault Hunters!
Nicko now began to think that this guy was going to kill them. They already were screwed, but this just made the situation worse. Acting in defense, he drew his sword and held it backwards in a Sol Badguy like style. “Anson… get down!”
Without even getting the time to react, Nicko pulled his brother down from the shoulder and places his hand on the ground. Using his teaching from the Elder Dragon Ryu, the Rune Slayer unleashed his Rising Slash skill to where the blades sides formed in front of the brother in a defensive barricade to absorb the bullets that were sprayed at them. Meanwhile, his brother used his own talents to form a few swords from his original blade and throw them directly into the eyes of the Loader Bots the Crystal pony brought along when they were trying to reload their weapons.
This surprised Metal Will for two reasons. One, because of the fact that these boys somehow had powers. Two, because besides magic, Sirens were the only ones known to have powers like this and there were only six sirens in the known universe. Two of them being Vault Hunters. Whatever the case, aggression like this couldn’t go unpunished.
Flying back to clear more distance his muzzle looked to have moved only for signs of six objects were launched from the city heading towards where they were now, with what looks to be eight flying Jet Loaders from the Pink Bubbled Shield in the distance. But the first to make it were the six objects that hit the ground, only to unveil the unnerving Badass Loaders with one of them being an Angel Guard.
From Metal Will’s vantage point, he was taking cover shooting at the twins thinking they were Siren Vault Hunters. He knew the identity of one from the video files of her hurting Jack. A little known fact is that he trained to fight sirens on his terms, to throw one of the prototype grenades hoping to defuse their only advantage.
But to his surprise, the grenade made contact with one of the stones that the Rune Slayer had thrown. The explosion went off, shrapnel and shards spreading everywhere. But in the smoke, Anson was preparing something to turn the tables.
“Nicko, get down!! BLADE RAIN!!”
Within seconds, a huge claymore slammed down into the ground and bursted open. Straight out the gate, a fury of swords swarmed the group of loaders. Despite them firing at the blades, each one of the bots got picked off one by one as Metal Will relied on the Angel Guard for protection.
Growling out at their possible combat symmetry, narrowing his gaze as he ordered the Jet Loaders to stay back out of their reach to fire rockets, while he will distract them from an ordered moderate yield moonshot. Though nearby, another being took notice of this opportunity with a shark like grin, readying a form that will likely get the desired effect to come, taking ‘her’ time for the right moment seeing a moonshot inbound to warp in to rescue these new boys.
Yelling out at the twins, Metal Will howled at them. “I’ll kill every last one of you Vault Hunters! I’ll cut off your heads and mount them on my trophy wall to show it off to Jack!” Firing several more shots this time with a couple slipping through the defenses.
Both Anson’s and Nicko’s defenses were slowly weakening, but what caught both of them off guard was the huge projectile coming straight at them. Being launched from the moon, it was coming at them from terminal velocity and turned into a flaming inferno that was wanting to burn them alive. Before the brothers could do anything though, a bird of fire swooped down from the sky and grabbed both warriors before warping out of the area, disappearing right in front of Metal Will’s eyes before the Moonshot made contact with the ground.
The Crystal Pony was now furious. The situation had now taken a toll for the worst. Using his cybernetics, he pulled up a com-line with F.A.U.S.T. and gritted his teeth.
“How is thou investigation coming along, Will?”
“It was going fine until the two boys decided to fight. They took out a few loader bots and a few Badass Loaders. I have video footage of the encounter and I have my suspicions that they are Sirens.”
“Does thou remember that Sirens are specifically Female? The two you encountered were male.”
“I know, but they had powers of their own. I would’ve had them until some firebird swooped in and-.”
“Wait… Did thou say “Firebird”? As in the Firehawk?” F.A.U.S.T. asked in a dangerous tone.
Now Metal Will was starting to realize this as well. “Well F***. Boss is not going to like it when I tell him my report.”
Unknown Location - Inside some Unknown Cave - After the fight
The first sensation and sound was a lone drip that landed on (whichever twin), as a feminine chuckle followed up the reaction by saying this. “You two boys seem to know how to get in a lot of trouble now, don’t you? Because as much as I LOVE seeing more humans besides myself, a couple others as vault hunters or the fake face Handsome Jack. I hope you won’t mind being saved from what looked like a Moon shot leveled at your adorable heads.” She said in a mature tone smiling gently at them.
The first real view the twins got of her was her glowing tattoos and lit up arm providing them light in what looks like a cave lined with crystals. “Perhaps some introductions could be made boys? Because I cannot just call you ‘drooling one and drooling two.” Giving them a wink as she began to lean against the nearest wall, while her outfit definitely showed her toned figure it also meant she wasn’t dressed for the cold out there. “I’ll let you both lay there in a heap to get your strength back.” Though her posturing showed that she was winded and trying to recover from that warp.
Giving them a chuckle before saying this after a bit to the possibly silent duo. “Are the two of you hormone driven boys going to lay in a heap or should I get some help since I am feeling fine here.” Seeming to verbally poke at them as she seemed a bit paler but not openly as exhausted as before just keeping the light going.
Nicko though was the first to speak. “Sorry about that, I just needed a moment to catch my breath. I’m Nicko and this my brother; Anson. Who are you?”
“Call me Lilith.” The Siren replied. “Gotta hand it to both of you, you two seriously got yourself into some deep sh*t with messing with Metal Will back there. If it weren’t for me warping you out of there, you two would’ve been killed by the moonshot that was fired at you.”
“Wait…” Anson said. “You were the firebird we just saw?”
“Firehawk, but to each their own. You know… Tomato, Tomato.” She said in response, giving out a soft sigh. “I was really hoping to have saved that warp to get inside that Hyperion branch to steal some Eridium and the Vault Key. Though if we sit around, Zer0 and Gaige should be back soon from checking to see if this cave links up to that place. You wouldn’t believe how much of a upperhand Jack has as for firepower. I wouldn’t be even surprised if he isn’t building a space station.”
“Wait, you mean as in this guy?” Nicko asked, showing the poster that Eris handed to him earlier when they first woke up.
“Yep, that’s the Son of a b*tch alright.” Nodding once to them with a gentle smile. “Though if you want to know something, I did that to his face.” She looked rather proud of that fact it seemed.
Nicko nodded his head, acting as if he was surprised (even though he wasn’t since both he and his brother played a lot of Borderlands back home). Surprisingly, thinking it was a safe place to come out, Eris emerged from Nicko’s body; stretching out her arms like she had been in hibernation. “Dear Chaos, that felt like forever.”
“What the F-?!”
“Don’t worry, she’s with us!” Nicko cut off Lilith before she could say anything. He was trying to assure to the Siren that the Draconequus wasn’t a threat.
Sighing in response she gave a weak chuckle saying this. “Well that’s good because I don’t think I could pull off another fight without a good dose of Eridium, that stuff is rare, unless you steal it from Hyperion.” Giving a stretching pop of her tattooed arm to loosen up a joint with sounds of another female and a mostly quiet male are coming closer.
Around now, Nicko began to feel something from within his pocket. Putting his hand inside, he pulled out what appeared to be a small bit of the crystal that exploded when he hit it with his rune. However, in the Sirens eyes, it was a small piece of Eridium that she was looking for to serve as a battery for Sirens.
“Nicko was it? Can I have that shard of Eridium from you?” She asked from her still seated position until a fulled suited Zer0 in a white winter color pattern with a bouncy mechromancer following behind him with a pout on her face. “Oh hey guys, I brought some houseguests!” Lilith attempted to be showy about it, but that earned a frown from Gaige.
“Please tell me, big sister, that you didn’t try to bring a bullymong back again.” Almost sounding exasperated... Until she saw the twins and perk an eyebrow. “I hope I’m not hallucinating again.”
“Nope, we’re real.” Anson said as Nicko handed the small shard to Lilith. “However, how we got here is another story.”
A question mark formed on top of Zer0’s head and Gaige just looked even more confused. Lilith herself was even a little puzzled by Anson’s sentence. This is where the explanation began. Where Nicko, Anson and Eris had to explain about how they ended up here, about being a “Displaced” and about what the two of them were capable of. At first, the three vault hunters weren’t exactly believing these so called “Tall tales”. But they soon were surprised dramatically when Nicko demonstrated his skills by conjuring a rune inside the palm of his hand.
“So you two are able to control Magic of your own?” Lilith asked. Both Twins nodded. This got the siren to think that it was somehow different from the powers she and Maya were capable of controlling.
A smile growing on her face as she added on the ‘puppy dog’ eyes treatment as the twins saw she seemed a bit better from that shard but not enough it seems as she asked this ‘tiny’ request from them. “Could you cuties help my friend Zer0 here break into the Hyperion base for us? Pretty Please with sugar on top?” The added ‘flutter’ of the eye lashes while a low groan from Gaige was heard nearby, with a deadpan -..- mark floating in front of Zer0’s visor.
Gaige broke the look by saying this. “What my big sister’s saying is that we need help busting pass the sub level wall me and Zer0 found, which she is trying to keep me out of it because well ‘it’s too dangerous for you!’ or ‘Your Deathtrap broke last time and that wasted more warping power to save you, don’t scare me like that!’. Seriously, I can take care of myself.” Gaige huff’s before soon after getting her hair scuffed good naturedly by Lilith.
Though the silence was broken by a swish carving fashion showing a rough guess of the wall to this location. Even going so far as to offering both twins what look to be Echo's and a Shield. With Zer0’s mask does a smiley face while pointing to himself than the twins pointing towards said wall.
“What kind of approach were you going for?” Anson asked. “I would assume that since Zer0 is a ninja that you would want to do the stealth approach?”
“If Salvador were here, he would rush in guns blazing with Krieg yelling “I’M THE CONDUCTOR OF THE POOP TRAIN!!” like he usually would.” They heard Gaige on the other end of the Echo. “Zer0 relies a lot on Deception. Finding a way to distract the guards so he could take them out silently.”
Hearing this, both Nicko and Anson looked at each other. “And let me guess… We’re the distraction?”
An emoticon of a smiley face showed up on Zer0, having the twins look at each other. “I’m starting to regret asking that question.”
Crystal Empire - Trade District, Hyperion Branch HQ - past midnight
There is activity going on so far tonight but nothing loud enough to cause a disturbance for anyone sleeping, some form or futuristic lighting is being set up at street corners as what looked to be ponies are busy away working and testing the installations. All the while there is a buzzing of activity around the Hyperion Branch HQ, tight nit patrols and small groups apparently doing scans or tests of some kind looking the place over with a figurative fine combed brush. Several human individuals whom looked like Jack on the poster were toiling away, directing activities to some while diagnosing on the other.
But through all this a far end Mare hole cover opened revealing one of the twins taking a look outside, with Zer0 having vanished staying below making his way somewhere. With a mission and action in mind, the twins begin hushed talking in how they would go about distracting Hyperion’s forces.
“How many of them are there?” Trying to get a proper ‘head count’ from the view seems to show around twenty, and most of them seem to be ponies from this distance fixing things as no details were certain but some welding torches showed they were likely engineers or repair crews. While there were heavier Loader Bots that didn’t seem like the push overs from outside the city.
“About Twenty.”
“Crap. Any ideas on how to distract them?”
Anson wondered the same thing. However, he did notice one thing that could possibly help them. In the back of the facility was a series of barrels that Hyperion used to store explosives. They were painted red and from Anson remembered as a kid when playing video games, “Red means Dead”. Summoning a spare sword, he sent it flying towards the set of barrels and the explosion that went off was massive. It caught the attention of all the guards just as Anson and Nicko began to charge in and slammed a few of the Doppelgangers into the cold ground and have them disperse into pixels.
“Now the fun begins.” The Infinity Sword chuckled as he unsheathed both of his blades and began to cut down the Handsome Jack doppelgangers. Nicko himself focused on using his magic to take down all the mechanical loader bots that were trying to pin down his brother with suppressing fire as he used his “Rising Wave” skill to summon long blades from underneath the mechanical feet of these machines.
They were doing great with making a distraction for Zer0 so he could infiltrate the compound. However, what the twins did not know is that their grand entrance also caught someone else’s attention.
Crystal Empire - Royal Bed Chambers - Moment of Explosion
*Handsome Jack perspective*
Blaring awake from instinct hearing a CLEAR explosion of some type while poor Glitterstone was still asleep cuddled into me, petting her head affectionately as it took someone familiar for her to even calm down enough to get some well needed rest. Though also in the room acting rather well creeper than normal was F.A.U.S.T. and Nightmare Moon, though the later looked jealous of the princess as I gave a grunt slowly unwinding from her clutches only (for weirdly enough the fore more) to replace me with a doll of me. The 'plush edition’ on the tag with washing instructions.
Giving them both a look as I motion us to leave the room quietly but quickly as possible, with ‘night’ to pick me up for that swift smokey action that sends shivers through me like I was being literally felt up. “Your sh*t is getting old one of these days. If the timing wasn’t bad, I’d likely compliment you on ‘how to grab a human under their clothes’. But don’t you give me sh*t that there hasn’t been an explosion. I FELT it from f*cking here, you only feel that if there is a siege which I don’t feel more of that size so it’s not Celestia bashing down the gates with alicorn hit crew.” Pointing to F.A.U.S.T. to have her give the details as she seems to lead the path, you forget plan details after so many years.
With a natural if exaggerated sway of the hips as she walks with tail flicks from either agitation or arousal, can never figure out which it can be so I will presume either or both, which some days it just HAS to be both. “Thou art correct, our Jack. It would seem the two youths from earlier are attacking the branch facility and cameras within are down. But recovered images shown a Vault Hunter using them as a distraction.” At the mention of ‘vault hunter’ nightmare knew I was reacting badly to that case, still doesn’t give her room to f*cking lick me.
Seeing F.A.U.S.T.’s eyes flash for a moment before they twitched in aggravation which I KNEW what that meant and it’s likely something I would be livid about. Bracing myself, I sigh and ignore Nightmare’s now successful attempts of intimate nuzzling and licks this was heard. “We are sorry to report that among the inventory, there is a small stock of Eridium and a Vault Key.” I must have stopped completely when I believed I misheard that bit, so asking her again only resulted the same god damn answer, three times.
Stomping forward at a breakneck pace yelling this out. “Get Saturn’s little ‘cousin’ launched down here so that we can F*CKING OBLITERATE THEM BEFORE THEY GET A FOOT OUTSIDE WITH THAT KEY!” Those three could keep up with my sprint though it was more like a calm half sprint being from the two alicorn types while Metal’s working those cybernetic legs I installed inside him. “WE GOT TO KEEP THEM AWAY FROM CIVILIANS! Don’t want a higher pony head count more than it is now!” Receiving a cough in response from F.A.U.S.T. got Jack’s attention.
Speaking in a matter-of-fact tone once more. “Well, Claptrap reports state that they have been avoiding attacking them. Perhaps it is either blind luck, but the only destroyed so far are the loader units on site or coming there. But in positive news, they are being forced back to a more ‘contained’ spot for custody. A specialized cell to drain magic users, for it will give us time after they are contained.” There was a glint possibly for getting to use something new again, or it could be that she wishes to show off.
But that all ended when hopping into a ready and waiting space worthy gunship, that the boys here had shown off earlier. They were so excited even when I was forcing them out to get some medical leave, they can be rather excitable like me most often. “Fine they are ONLY just damaging MY property. Nighty, if you could help us deal with the Vault Hunter problem, I might just think about ‘some’ of your highly ‘suggested’ actions you have been laying out for me…” At this point, I was not entirely sure if I do give a crap about rejecting what she wants.
It might even be fun, though that smoke stuff is still creepy as anything, though never as bad as the idea of vault hunters gunning me down. ‘I sure hope I don’t die from Lilith like in the games…’ Taking a breath to tell my current company present will likely, alter their actions in the future but so long as it doesn’t happen I will be okay.
Back at the Facility…
*Twins perspective*
Everything had been going smoothly so far. Nicko and Anson had provided a big enough distraction to allow Zer0 to infiltrate the Hyperion Facility undetected while they dealt with wave after wave of incoming Loader Bots. It was easy at first, but something didn’t seem right to the Rune Slayer as his brother struck down another doppelganger with his two blades.
“Lilith, you there?”
“Yes, Nicko. I hear you loud and clear.” The Siren over the Echo device said as a few more loader bots began to attack. But this time, with different tactics and weapons that were trying to push them backwards.
“Something’s off with the Loader Bots. They’re not the same like they were before.”
“Not the same? What the hell are you talking about?”
“They got some more heavier firepower, but they’re not trying to hit us. It’s like they’re trying to push us into a corner.”
At those words, the Siren’s heart skipped a beat. “Are there a series of cages behind you two?”
Turning around, Nicko and Anson saw what Lilith was asking about. “Yes, they’re open like they want us to walk into them.”
“Blow the living Sh*t out of them!!!” Lilith yelled to them. “Those things will drain you for every ounce of magic you two have! Dammit, Jack must’ve been preparing for something like this-.”
Before Nicko could respond back, a shot from a Loader Bot’s machine gun destroyed the twin’s echo device. The Rune Slayer cursed his bad luck and launched a few explosive runes to destroy the cells they would’ve been imprisoned in.
“Anson, push forward!!”
“Got it!”
That was… Until two cages from directly above them landed on top of them, locking them in and sealing them inside.
“Ooooh. You should’ve looked up now, kiddos.”
The two brothers looked up, only to look at a familiar face they had seen only once already today.
Handsome Jack.
(Handsome Jack’s point of view)
Repelling down with a tired stagger with the two attractive alicorns present, though Nightmare Moon is giving the brats the glowing white eyes and snarling fanged treatment until I finger flicked her ear. Though F.A.U.S.T. definitely knows how to work the disappointed mother angle down to a tee besides the alluring sway she has now looks agitated. “Before anything kiddos, try anything and F.A.U.S.T. will show you why Chaos spawn of any generation or above should fear her.”
Pointing to said robotic Alicorn in a more than form fitting yellow Hyperion business suit that never looks wrinkled. “Now, did you two KNOW that I was a Displaced or not? If not it’s understandable, also Metal Will-” pointing a thumb back to the grumbling pony in question shaking a fist and entering the facility. “- has been reprimanded for shooting first without seeking confirmation of identity.” Though at this point, Nightmare moon stepped closer saying this in a slight archaic tone. “Thou should know dangers of putting our coltfriend at risk to future harm!” Only to see behind her with me shaking my head face palming.
“Pfft. I got a few things for you buddy…” A new voice came into play as an oddly familiar, yet colored mist floats from the boy with the two hairbangs and takes form outside the cage. To my surprise, a Draconequus came to life as she looked at us with an intimidating grin. “First off-” She started, pointing at F.A.U.S.T. with an eagle talon. “Don’t even think about using Chaos’ name in vain like that. Two, your Metal Lunatic didn’t give us an opportunity to talk with his anger management problem and a gun pointed at my friends face. Three, and this is more of a personal thought, why is Nightmare Moon here acting like a mare trying to protect her Prized Possession?”
Scratching the back of my head giving a sigh, only to move that same hand to rub my tired eyes. “Well, when you use chaos to bring an alicorn back from the dead, I’d like to see your claim than. Second Metal Will has some issues still because of first Sombra, than Equestrians taking over the Crystal Empire and trying to legally hunt down and kill the remaining royal family that Sombra didn’t get. As for that last part, I have no idea. She’s just into me!” Earning a chuckle from the Nightmare in question as she slithered back up against me from behind saying this just loud enough, while licking my ear. “You just need to realize your potential, as your body OOZES virility.”
The Draconequus herself just facepalms herself with her lion paw as she looks at me and Nightmare Moon. “Dear mother of Chaos. She’s trying to seduce you. And just when I thought that seeing my Father roleplay with my mother was disturbing enough.” I raised an eyebrow as I saw the two boys giving similar expressions of being disturbed by Nightmare’s actions.
Sighing after this, I gave them a look before responding. “When you three get old enough to do adult activities, please be more reasonable than this mare.” Pointing at Nightmare’s direction only for her to nibble on the finger giving a convulsing shiver. “STOP THAT WILL YOU?!?” Only to grunt in visible pain motioning for the needle as F.A.U.S.T. moves in to inject the pain sedative, while the two alicorns looked worried.
“You know you're talking to two teenagers around eighteen years old and the three of us are trying to get back to our home before a Psychotic Esper tears it apart before trying to possibly tear open a rift. So I think we got some higher priorities than having you teach health class.” The Draconequus shot back.
“Okay, just who are you exactly?” I asked this possibly important question to the Draconequus.
“Names Eris. Daughter of Discord and Princess Celestia… Well, where I’m from at least.”
Now this just went from interesting to downright surprising; faster than Ms. 20% cooler in ten seconds flat. Rubbing my face synthetic face slowly as the magic based chemicals of the pain reducer go into effect, gazing at said ‘Eris’ to say this. “Well young mare... As comical as the thought is of you being my buddy’s daughter and my two former friends either ‘daughter or niece’, I have to say if I was hearing this in a better state of mind I would be laughing my ass off not at you but at the very THOUGHT.” Soon enough, I raise my ‘f*ck off’ finger to the sky angled just behind me at quite possibly desensitized horror from the great beyond who f*cks with my life likely not giving the same amount to be offended.
Turning towards me, Eris snarled a little. “I honestly think you’re seeing things.”
“Uhh, Eris? I don’t know if it’s me, but we’re seeing it too.” The one with the two swords says to her. All the Draconequus did was cross her arms.
“Maybe it’s because of those stupid cages. Here, let me fix that.”
“Highly doubt that you can, Missy and highly suggest for health reasons against that.” I said. “You are a ‘spirit of chaos’. Otherwise a purely magical being right?” Waiting for her response as I moved closer to lightly tap the cage, moving to unlock them as I whistle for a couple of Loader Bots fly in to lift the cages off from the locked position freeing the twins. “Pure magical beings like Discord in something like this is a death sentence while Tartarus is just a dampener.”
“And you’re letting us out for what reason exactly?” One of the boys asked as he began to drink what looked like a PowerAde bottle with a recycling symbol on it.
Giving them a deadpan look saying this. “For starters you kids were brought into this mess by my very angry top of the bar fighter Metal Will, and secondly I am not too sure if the info from another Displaced on the ‘Vault hunters’ after me are real or not. Though them being around after a thousand years and not bones? I’ll go with not human and definitely no changeling. Besides it isn’t your fault that others use you for bigger games, but there is one tiny issue that F.A.U.S.T. is likely never to move on.” I point towards the extensive damage they had done by being the distraction.
“Lets say you guys have a HIGH running bill for cost of repairs and Hyperion collects, so you’ll take one of my tokens, collect the amount on that receipt.” Taking a moment to point at F.A.U.S.T.; whom is now holding a piece of paper with the cost going into the thousands… “And either pay back in full or in installments/helping out.”
“Actually…” The Boy in the half shirt interrupts as he turned towards his bag. “there might not be a need to do delivery service. How much is the exact amount on the receipt?”
F.A.U.S.T. casually reads over the tallied numbers aloud as if it was the weather being spoken about. “It would amount to almost exactly 140,034.57 Bits, in value at this time due to market projections.” Gazing up at the boys and young draconequus now, as her gaze gave the feeling of utter disappointment in the three.
But not the one who spoke before. “Actually. I’ll give you this.”
Before I could even speak, The teen drops a leather bag down on the ground and it landed with a loud metallic CLANK!! Opening it up, I was shocked to find the bag filled with Bits.
“I was recently given a Thank you statement after helping a Stallion named Filthy Rich with a few tasks and the rewards were worth it. I still have some money of my own to help me right now, but I think giving you ten million bits should be enough.”
Giving the kids a raised eyebrow before having F.A.U.S.T. extract the amount required before hearing their response that got me chuckling.
“Shouldn’t be much since your company would probably consider this amount as ‘Chump change’ if you know what I mean.”
Oh this kid was good at Borderlands references; definitely good. “Well kiddos, since you’ve squared things off with me as for the bills. Why don’t I give you two my token in case you lot wish to do business in the future or would like some other things, nothing personal though, because it’ll keep things simple and I am still a bit ticked by your second impression.” Giving them a narrowed look as a loader bot handed the Hyperion Acquisition Beacon to Eris. In return, both of the boys handed me their own tokens. The one with the shoulder Tattoo’s handed me a stone with a Rune inscribed on it while the other one handed me a darkened shard of crystal that he called a Dark El Shard or whatever the hell it was. Possibly some anime crap.
Giving them to F.A.U.S.T. for now as she put them somewhere like the Iron lich’s token, been meaning to ask her this. “So how do we send these three home? Because last time you used a token and sent them back, but they didn’t come by token this time so it might not work.” The response F.A.U.S.T. gave looked rather sly looking at Eirs, moving closer to her before saying these words. “Thou shalt know it will hurt for ONLY a moment…” giving her not a moment to respond to the statement before jamming her finely crafted hand into the younger draconequi’s stomach; feeling around for something before making a portal with another hand and tossing the girl through, ass first.
“I’m guessing we just hop on in?” The Half Shirt boy asked. F.A.U.S.T. only replied with a nod and was about a few seconds away from pushing the two of them in there. Surprisingly though, they instead jumped in towards the rift like they were going to jump off a cliff. As they left, I soon realized something.
Thinking on it for a moment before I sighed. “I forgot to ask for their names… Well not like it matters. I hate brats out of any species of Kids, that eris was kind of a b*tch towards us too. Likely didn’t know you have that chaos eater sword from the old kingdoms?” Making a casual comment earning a nod in response as there was a sort of fiery look to her eyes, might be a bit of blood lust? “Right lets just try not to cause another chaos battle… Poor girl likely wouldn’t make it three minutes with how fast you move now, and how fast your intelligence is.” Giving out a shiver from how easy she is at manipulating without much effort.
Castle of the Royal Pony siblings…
Like anyone else in his position, Discord was bored. Worried, but bored. It had only been a few hours since his daughter had disappeared with Anson and Nicko and now he was wondering where they could’ve possibly ended up. This question though answered itself the moment that a galactic vortex was torn open and the sounds of bodies crashed onto the floor. As the smoke cleared up, Discord found a rather unusual sight.
His daughter landing face first on the ground followed by Anson landing right on top of her. The sight made him chuckle a bit as they looked back at the elder Draconequus.
“Well, this is a surprise.”
Both of them soon scrambled to each other’s feet as Eris and Anson looked at each other before looking at Discord. “This isn’t what it looks like.”
Before they could even explain anything, Molly and Amy rushed into the room from a corridor in a nearby hallway. “There you two are! Where the hell is Nicko?”
Looking around, Anson soon realized that his brother was indeed missing. Did something happen with the Portal F.A.U.S.T. made for them to go home? It was uncertain right now. But soon, a holographic image of a familiar foe reappeared.
“Well, look at that. You made it through my little funhouse. Unfortunately, you’re suppose to be dead right now… Well, we can change that.”
With a snap of the Esper’s fingers, something new began to form about the heads of all five individuals in the room. It seemed… demonic in nature and soon, the hologram faded away to reveal what Eric had left behind for them.
Right now, the sheer size of the Beast that the Tracer had left for them was what surprised all of them. Anson though, had the perfect words to describe the situation.
“SON OF A TAINT!!! ”
Elsewhere…
When Nicko opened his eyes again, he found himself alone. Eris wasn’t here and neither was his brother. In fact, he wasn’t even in the Castle of the Royal Pony Siblings anymore.
The Rune Slayer had somehow ended up in Canterlot. Which was strange because he entered roughly around the same time that both his brother and Eris entered the portal to go home. Did some kind of mistake happen? Was he in another Equestria again? Many thoughts bounced through his head as he tried to be aware of his surroundings.
Around then though was when he heard the sound of someone walking behind him. Using his hearing, the boy followed the sound of the footsteps and for a brief moment, she saw something that reminded him of the boy’s mother.
Turning around another corner, the human could now see who this person was.
“Excuse me, ma’am?”
The girl turned around, her eyes briefly looked at him with a bit of shock. “Y-you’re one of Ciela’s boys! Nicko, right?!”
“H-how do you know my mother? Matter of fact, how do you know about me?!” The teen asked, taking it as a possible sign of caution and not knowing if this individual was a threat or not. He gripped his blade just in case.
“I knew her for a long time. In fact, you know my daughters… Amy and Molly.”
End Chapter 14
And now that long chapter is finally done. The Third Displaced Crossover in this story. This time, with Architect of Realities and the story Handsome Jack's Return. Ironically, Borderlands: The Handsome collection came out this week 
And with that, two chapters remain in this story as the final battle approaches. Here we go!
And just for fun. You get Tiny Tina.
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Oh this is gonna be good, can't wait to see the next chapter.
5790639 FIGHT!! Which reminds me...
This chapter was great. I really liked the interaction between Jack and the twins.
5790762 Same here
that was good :)
5790777 Why thank you kind sir
5821764 trust me. There's more than one reason why
I gotta say, I'm not liking Handsome Jack or F.A.U.S.T. whenever I see them. Not that they're badly written or anything, but they're just the kind of people I don't like.
Well that's a twist...
5821929 say what now triple!!!