“No man can be ideally successful until he has found his place. Like a locomotive he is strong on the track, but weak anywhere else.”
-Orison Swett Marden
Shining, Vinyl, and Glory all three let out the largest sighs of their collectives lives as they finally sat down on the train. The trio all seemed to sink into the plush seats of their personal compartment and deflate into a slightly more relaxed state.
“The hard part is over, thank Celestia.” Shining said as he took off his helmet and sat it on the seat beside him. Scratch and Glory were sitting side by side in the seat across from the guard, both looking uncomfortable that they were so close together. “Now the easy part: going to Ponyville and meeting Lily.”
“‘Easy part’ Sure.” Vinyl put her hooves up in air quotes around the first part of her sentence. Sarcasm was a good sign in Shining’s eyes, it meant she cared enough not to completely lock up.
“Easier than running around Canterlot calling in favors.” Shining amended his statement. “So, physically easier. Not so much emotionally.” He knew that there would be some, if not a lot, of tears being shed in the coming days. That wasn’t his part to deal with, though. Shining had gotten them both on the right track, now Sky and Scratch had to do their part.
“I still want to say thank you, Shining Armor.” Glory sat up straight, smoothing a few of her feathers with a hoof. “I don’t think any of this would be possible without you.” While Glory smiled, Vinyl looked relatively displeased.
“We never really tried…” The stark white mare added. “I mean, it’s not like either of us ever bothered to look for her or anything.” That impacted Glory’s smile, turning it into a desolate sadness. Shining only furrowed his brow in response.
E-either way…” Glory stammered out, trying to force back whatever negative emotions plagued her. “Thank you, Shining. We both appreciate it more than you could ever know.” The pegasus’ shaky smile returned.
“Just doing my job, Sky.” Shining responded with a smile. He was going to stay out of any possible altercations that Scratch might start with Sky. The last thing he wanted to do was to start in with Scratch and have to use the failsafe on her. That would leave them all in a rotten mood. If the situation arose, he would be the one to bring it all to a halt.
“Mighty fine job it is, Twinkle.” Shining didn’t know if there was any sarcasm in Scratch’s voice. He didn’t detect any hint of it, but he didn’t feel that Scratch’s words were genuine. It was the first time in quite awhile where he felt that Scratch wasn’t being outwardly honest with him.
“Vinyl, be nice. Shining Armor is doing us a favor as a family.” Glory reprimanded her sister with a slight tap on the shoulder. “The least you could do is stop with the sarcasm.” While Shining appreciated Sky’s words, he wasn’t sure it was the best idea to scold Vinyl. While he could get away with it, he wasn’t so sure that Scratch would let Sky slide so easily.
“You’re going to lecture me on family? That’s rich.” It was barely more than a mumble, but Shining heard it. He closed his eyes and sent up a prayer to whoever would listen that this would go no further.
Something happened, something tremendously unexpected. Instead of turning away and taking the insult like he thought she would, Sky furrowed her eyebrows and hardened her gaze. Shining’s prayer went unanswered and Glory opened her mouth.
“I am sick and tired of your mouth, Vinyl Scratch.” Full name did not bode well, and neither did the very cold tone that Sky adopted. “I have been nothing but understanding for so long. I-I have let you get mad at me and berate me and I’ve stayed quiet. I’ve been your whipping mare for too long!” Even Vinyl was shocked, as the unicorn’s eyes were widened and jaw slack. “If you would’ve just talked to me sooner, if you would’ve just forgiven me we could’ve moved on from this!”
Shining had to hold his breath, he was too afraid that even the slightest inhale of the dense tenseness in the atmosphere might suffocate him. It was terrifying to see the wheels in Vinyl’s head begin to turn, like the great flames of hate were being stoked and the machine that was Vinyl’s temper was starting to come to life.
“You think it’s just that easy?” Vinyl’s words started calmly, signalling that the storm had not even begun. “You think I can just forgive you? That I can just put what you did aside and say it’s okay? No.” Vinyl shook her head, her magenta eyes igniting with an intense inferno. “No, you don’t get to pin this on me!”
“It’s been six years, Vinyl! Six! Years!” Glory shot back at her sister. “You weren’t in my shoes, you didn’t know what I was going through!” Shining was looking on, monitoring the situation for any signs of escalation. He would let a shouting match slide, it had to be cathartic for both of them.
“I was right there by your side the entire time, Sky!” Vinyl put her front hooves to her temples and applied pressure, like she was trying to suppress a terrible headache. “I was there for you at night when you cried about Rusty not being there, I was there for every mood swing and every craving! Every bucking contraction and push, I was there by your side!” Vinyl stood up, slamming her hooves against the floor of the carriage. “Then what do you do? You leave a defenseless foal out in the middle of nowhere, not caring what happened to her! What if she had died, Sky? Huh? What if she had died instead of being adopted?” Vinyl’s voice dropped to a low growl. “Because I’ve been thinking about that every day for the last six years…”
“You weren’t there when I needed you most! When I was alone in the hospital with a newborn foal, you were out cavorting with your hooligan boyfriend!” Tears started to flow from Glory’s eyes. “I didn’t know if I could love her the way she needed to be loved, Vinyl. I didn’t think I could do it. I’d never known how to love something, not like that.”
“You never loved me?” The question cut through the somber tone like a hot knife. Glory’s breath hitched and quiet tears of fury rolled down Vinyl’s cheeks. “You never loved mom? Dad? They meant absolutely nothing to you?”
“Vinyl, that love is different from the love of a mother.” Sky replied weakly, her wings drooping to her sides and the fight leaving the pegasus.
“How would you know? It’s not like you ever loved the foal in the first place.” Sky opened her mouth but Vinyl cut her off. “Don’t give me the spiel about the orphanage, either. That’s just some sick stab at punishment that you’ve done to yourself, Sky. I know everypony else sees you as some champion of the orphans, as a good pony.” The next words came out as a meer snarl, slithering their way through Vinyl’s lips and across the cabin. “You’re just a fraud looking for repentance.”
“Alright Scratch, that’s enough.” Shining stood up. That’s as far as he was going to let this go. He could let her get away with calling her out on legitimate things, but devaluing Glory’s charity work was another thing entirely. It was uncalled for and rude. “Take a walk.”
“Twinkle.” Vinyl growled and lowered her stance.
“You’ve seen the way this ends, Scratch.” Shining lowered his harshest glare and the mare. “Take. A. Walk.” there was a stalemate of stares for a few moments until Vinyl finally backed down and trotted out of their compartment, slamming the door behind her. Shining let loose a sigh of relief and sat back down. He trusted that Vinyl wouldn't act out against anypony else on the train, she would just silently until he went and talked to her.
“That felt good…” Glory stated, her ears laid flat against her head. “Celestia, that felt so good…” Shining reached out and put a hoof on her shoulder. The pegasus raised her head, tears still falling across her daisy cheeks.
“Are you okay?” It was a question that Shining had gotten almost too used to asking ponies lately. It was starting to lose a little meaning to him, not that what it meant to him really mattered. It was the pony that being asked that needed to find meaning in the question.
“I don’t know.” Glory replied, her eyes searching his own for some sort of assurance. It wasn’t something that Shining could exactly give out. “I-can you go talk to Vinyl? I don’t want her to be alone...” Shining had to admire that even after all of the yelling and accusations she was still worried about Vinyl. That was true family, and he admired that. If it wasn’t his job to make sure that Vinyl was alright, he would go just for Glory’s sake.
In the end, it was his job. Either way he was destined to go find Vinyl and make sure she didn’t do something rash. The guard stood and nodded to Glory and exited the compartment. He looked each direction and saw a slightly ajar door at the end of the car leading to the next one. That was the only lead he had, so he took it.
Lo and behold, standing on just outside of the door and leaning on a very thin metal railing was Vinyl Scratch. She was watching the railroad ties pass underneath the train and watching the hitch between the cars jiggle and jangle as the locomotive made its way across the Equestrian landscape.
“Scratch!” Shining had to yell over the sound of the train’s rhythmic rolling on the tracks. He could barely hear himself think, let alone even hope to have a decent conversation with Vinyl out here. That was proven when Vinyl responded to him, but he couldn’t hear a single word she said. He assumed, with startling accuracy, that it amounted to ‘go away, Twinkle.’
Shining fired up his horn and a bright pink bubble materialized around the pair of ponies. It was a modified protection spell infused with a soundproofing spell that he had picked up while he was a teen for...various reasons. It was enough to block out all of the raucous that the train was causing and replacing it with an intense silence that was only marred by the shaking platform they stood on.
“Neat trick.” Vinyl commented, not taking her eyes from some point in the distance. Shining sidled up beside her, resting his head on the constantly jittering railing. He wasn’t really feeling like fighting her or her attitude today. He just wanted to go to Ponyville and get the reunion going, that would be the thing that could get some good feelings going. That’s all he wanted, a bit of positive emotions in the air.
“It’d be useful if you knew a few tricks, like getting along with Glory.” He wasn’t going to prod her or ask her how she was feeling and try to get at her the long way, he was just going to go for it. He was too exasperated to continue the runaround with Scratch.
“This is what we’re going to do? We’re going to fight?” Scratch rested her head beside his own and closed her eyes. “I know you don’t get it, but sometimes you just have to let me be angry, alright?” Shining looked over at her, trying to catch a glimpse at whatever Vinyl was really feeling. “Alright?” Vinyl asked again, a bit more insistence in her tone than before.
“No.” Shining responded with a sigh. “It’s not alright. I can’t have you just going around being angry all the time.” How in Equestria could he communicate his own frustrations to Vinyl without also making her upset? “I know I don’t understand everything you’re feeling, it’s impossible for me to even come close to knowing how any of this feels.” Admitting his ignorance might be his only way through, if she knew he was wrong it might make her less volatile. “So explain it to me, please.”
There was a tense moment of silence, one punctuated only by slow breaths and chins rattling against a metal bar. He was hoping that whatever bond he had formed with Vinyl was enough to make her see that he only wanted to help.
“You ever have bad dreams, Twinkle?” A simple question, one that hid true intentions and deeper meaning. He would go along with it, for now.
“Of course I have, Scratch.” Off the top of his head he could think of a recurring nightmare, one of dancing shadows and emerald flames. It had been something he had tried so hard to get past, but it was out of his control.
“That’s been my life for the past six years...a bad dream.” Vinyl lifted her head from the railing and opened her eyes. “It’s like I went to sleep and I just haven’t been able to wake up. First my parents died, then Glory’s foal...then I just kept sleeping.” It was one of the realest and most genuine moments that Shining had ever heard come from Vinyl. It was even a little profound. “I slept through six years, numbed by a bunch of drinks and a lot of hate.” Vinyl sighed again and closed her eyes once more. “I-I tried a few times to make things better. I went on dates and tried to talk to Sky. I tried to live...but each time it just made me more and more tired. Each time I just failed and wanted to sleep.”
“Why Glory, though?” That was the focus of the problem right now. That’s the problem he wanted to get to the heart of. “She’s admitted to her wrongdoings, she’s tried to make up for it.” He was hoping that Vinyl would not snap and yell, just that she would explain. That’s all he needed, an explanation.
“Yeah.” Vinyl chuckled, a sinister undertone permeating the action. “How did she make up for it? Helping orphans? Like I said back there-” She pointed a hoof accusingly towards the car where Glory was sitting. “-that’s her trying to seek her own forgiveness. She’s not doing it to actually help, she’s just trying to make herself feel better about what she did.” The fire was back in Vinyl’s eyes, the one that he hated with all of his being. It meant nothing but trouble. ”Why didn’t she ever try to find her daughter, huh? Why did she drop off a defenseless foal in the middle of nowhere? Because she’s a good pony? Because she was scared? Good ponies don’t just do bad things like that.”
“You’ve done some things good ponies wouldn’t do.” Shining kept his voice soft and caring. He didn’t want to be condescending, he wasn’t even trying to be. He just wanted to show VInyl that she and Glory were no different.
“I’m not a good pony, Twinkle. I never claimed to be.” Vinyl retorted sourly.
“I think you are.” Shining replied, standing up and facing his friend. “Like Glory, you’re just a good pony who did bad things for complicated reasons.” Shining knew a thing or two about morality and the difference between good and evil. Comic books had taught him, sure. But that didn’t make the lessons any less valuable.
“Some ponies don’t get a pass, Twinkle! They don’t get to get off that easily!” Now Vinyl was mad, and Shining was in a tough spot. “You and everypony else seems to think that what she did is no big deal, that she did it because she was sad or whatever. She put an innocent life in danger, Shining!” Vinyl stepped closer, pleading with Shining at this point. “Wh-what if there was a storm planned that night? What if the pegasi pushed a cold front through? What if some wild animal was near? What if Lily died that night, Shining?” Tears were welling up in Vinyl’s eyes and her knees were knocking together. He wanted to pull her into a hug for some reason, to let her know that it was all okay. “That’s been my nightmare for six years, Shining! Now I feel like I’m finally about to wake up, and Sky can’t even admit what she did was wrong! I don’t want to fail again.” Her voice dropped to a near whisper. “I don’t want to feel tired anymore.”
“You don’t have to.” Shining reached out and put a hoof on Vinyl’s shoulder. “I’m here to help you move past all of this. Consider me your wake up call.” He added a little smirk to his statement, trying to inject a bit of their humor into the proceedings. “I just need you to try and put your feelings aside for one day, Scratch. One day of cooperation and we can start you and Glory on a better path.” The look he received from Vinyl let him know that the outcome he proposed was not one she liked all that much. “I’m not saying it will make everything better overnight or heal things completely, but I think it will help.” He gave her his winning smile to let her know he was being genuine. “We just need to stay on track, yeah?”
“Yeah.” Vinyl responded. “Stay on track.”
“C’mon, let’s go back inside. We’re almost to Ponyville, I think.”
Sigh!
Ain't that the truth...
Mmm... I can relate to this chapter man... the dream business, feel like that everyday...
*Hums*
Shadows and Emerald flames? Could it be whats methinks it is?
hehe
I'm still hoping this goes where I'm hoping its going... I so desperately want it to.
Nice job!
Ouch. That's the bitter kind of contempt. She isn't even really getting worked up about it anymore. I don't think this is actually getting fixed at this point. Once people have reached the point where they won't even get angry about the reason they loathe someone, it's the kind of thing that doesn't change again. That's not just upset feelings, that's genuinely thinking about someone that way. Upset feelings you can talk out once they've calmed down, but that kind of judgment? That stays with people.
Good chapter. It seems like we might be making a little progress with Vinyl, getting her to cool her temper long enough to talk about what's bothering her. Hopefully that trend keeps up.
7614641
It's one of the lessons that Shining has to learn in the end. Sometimes you can't just move past it, you can't forgive someone entirely. If someone hurts you bad enough, violates who you are or what you stand for on a deep enough level, they don't deserve a full pardon no matter the relation.
Sometimes hate is healthy in the right dosage.
7614395
7614459
I found that describing depression is very difficult. It's not something you can pin down with a few words, or even with a whole story. Each person experiences it a bit different, and you have to be able to get the core set of feelings down. I've dealt with it long enough that I know how Vinyl feels.
Being tired was the only way that made sense to explain it.
7615141 Being tired is a really common point, if ot almost universal. Both in my experience and in my psychology class.
7615136
"Some things can't be made whole again" is certainly one of the harder lessons in life to learn... even if it is somewhat at odds with the message this show usually goes for.
I feel a connection with Vinyl in this chapter. Whenever i go through one of my depressive episodes, i always think that it'd be better for me to just go to sleep and wake up when every thing is back to normal again. Depression is a beast and is portrayed very well in this story.
7615141
The tired aspect is really one of the main focal points to it, from what I've seen throughout me days.
Really empathizing with Vinyl here. It feels like Glory realized her foal could have met a horrible fate and she didn't want to know, so she just forgot about Lilly and tried to drown her memory with all those other orphans.
Dammit, started reading this when it was updated and now I've finished what's been done.
7622498
Imagine having to wait through the year long hiatus between 'Change of Pace' and 'Concerto'
Yeesh.
7622793 O-oh, a year-long hiatus, huh?
Yeah, y-yeah that sounds pretty bad...
7624519
You got me there!
A little advice? Just keep coming back to it, write little bits of it every once in awhile. Sooner or later it will all come pouring out like a flood. If you ever need any ideas or advice, hit me up and I'll help you hash it out.
Just a quick question, is this following canon with Shining Armor and Cadence?
7633884 Thats a very good question. As of right now, that's still up in the air.
I apologize if that's not the answer you wanted.
7634028 That's perfectly alright, I was just really hoping, and I'm not sure if thus is likely, that Armor and Scratch would end up together.
7634610
That's the outcome I would like, but I'm waiting to see if it fits the story.
7635081 I really hope it does, I didn't feel too much one way or the other, then well, the event occured.
...Steal Hooves?
Man, fuck you, Sky. Jesus Christ.
10835892
Hey like 5 years later and it still has the desired effect! Good to know!