• Published 21st Apr 2012
  • 23,682 Views, 1,190 Comments

Just Another Average Tuesday - Flamesinger599



A 16-year old boy is transported to Equestria and given the form of a dragon.

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The Home of The Dragons

A/N: Hello everyone! Sorry for the long-ass update, and once again I have no excuse other than being too damn distracted by other people's stories. In return, I made this chapter a bit longer than usual. Enjoy, and please remember to R&R!

Darkclaw1 to Bigcat5, do you read me, over?

“Quit with the mind speak Flame. I'm less than five feet away from you.”

Target sighted, requesting permission to breach, over.

“Flame.”

Bigcat5, do you read me?

“Flame.”

I repeat: Bigcat5, do you read me? Respond!

“FLAMESINGER!!!”

Alpha2, we have been compromised! Bigcat5 is down! Requesting back-

My mental transmission was interrupted by the feeling of a huge claw around my neck and the sight of a very angry manticore two inches from my face.

“Flame?”

“Sir?”

“Shut up and climb the goddamn mountain.”

“Yes sir.”

The mountain in question was actually our destination. We were at the very edge of the Everfree, staring up at what could only be the home of the dragons. It helped that there were dragons flying all around it.

The so-called 'mind speak' that I had been using was actually discovered on accident. I'd been trying to mind-control a bunny out of sheer boredom, like Tienn had done to me, and I might have accidentally targeted Manty's mind instead of the bunny's. After a furious mental fight (which pretty much consisted of Manty sending attack after attack until he realized it was me) and a good deal of apologizing and experimenting, we had found a semi-practical way of communicating over long distances. That, and annoying the crap out of Manty.

Manty gazed up at the mountain.“You sure you want to do this?”

“No. Let's do it before I change my mind.”

“Let's? That implies that there will be more than one of us. I'll wait for you out here, but there is no way I'm going near that place.”

“Why not? You're a manticore, what are you afraid of?”

“50 fire-breathing dragons that like to gang up on manticores for fun, that's what.”

“And I'm about to head straight into their home? Fan-fricking-tastic.”

“They might try to do the same to you. Ganging-up is a hobby for dragons.”

“Thanks for the huge vote of confidence. I feel much more terrified now.”

“This was YOUR idea.”

“That it was.”

I sat staring at the mountain for another minute or so. Then with a heavy sigh, and the feeling that this wasn't going to end well, I spread my wings and took off for the top of the mountain.

wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Long story short, I shouldn't have worried.

Dragons apparently don't really care about members of their own species, so I was able to fly around and observe in peace. What I found wasn't entirely disappointing either. The grown dragons, which were about one and a half times my size, where exactly what I had hoped for: majestic, big, wise-looking, and only interested in you if you annoyed them. I said hello to a few of them, just a simple greeting, and while they usually looked surprised at being addressed in a friendly matter by a complete stranger they would greet me as well. Just like your average-day human, except...not.

The teenagers though, leaved a lot to be desired.

They all seemed to be part of a gang, which was lead by a red and orange dragon who seemed to be sneering almost 90% of the time. They were gathered next to several huge piles of gems and were currently having a wrestling competition. The classic one-on-one-in-the-middle-while-everyone-yells-at-you kind of thing. I almost joined them, as they were the only teenage dragons I could see, but I had no intention of becoming part of a street gang. Even if it was the norm for dragons.

So I just sat there, observing, watching the leader beat dragon after dragon. If you looked closely, you could tell that the other dragons weren’t trying very hard. Apparently the boss had a fearsome reputation.

As much as I enjoyed watching the gang leader assert his position as head honcho, it become boring after one or two rounds. I wished something would happen, or, more importantly, that I would find the strength to get off my lazy ass and find some better form of entertainment.

As usual, I thought the wrong things at the wrong times.

About fifty feet away from me I spotted a small dragon. A really small dragon, as in kid-sized. This caught my attention because I hadn’t seen any little kid dragons anywhere since I had arrived, something I had thought was weird but didn’t question. So I took my chance now to examine what a baby dragon looked like.

He was only about half as tall as a teenage dragon, with green and purple scales. He had no wings and carried a classic handkerchief-tied-to-a-stick carrying bag slung over his shoulder. He had just climbed over the rim of the mountain and was panting, his eyes surveying the rocky valley. As soon as he saw the group of teenage dragons, his face brightened and he made straight for them, sliding down the side of the short cliff.

Now what does he think he’s doing?

I watched him reach the bottom of the hill, walk over to the group of teenagers, and start talking to them like nobody’s business.

I couldn’t hear what was being said, but the kid seemed to be introducing himself, while the teenagers all just stared at him.

A little kid trying to join a street gang? That...makes no sense whatsoever.

The teenagers must have been thinking along the same lines, except they handled it in a completely different manner. Instead of informing the kid of his mistake and telling him to back home to his own personal happy utopia known as childhood, they started making fun of him. Soon the kid found himself the center of jeers, name-calling, and pretty much anything that a five-year old would consider soul-crushing insults.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You guys just crossed a line. Making fun of kids ain’t nice.

I was about to head down there and give the group of knuckleheads a piece of my mind, but I was distracted when I noticed something watching the kid and the teenagers from a short distance away.

I use the term ‘something’ because it was most definitely not a living dragon. It fact, as I got closer, it appeared to be a very badly made costume of a dragon. It had all of it attention focused on the group of teenagers, so it didn’t notice me walking up behind it.

I was right on both parts. Yes, it was a costume, and yes, it was very bad. For one, it had eight pairs of legs, four white and four cyan, which were poking out of cut holes in the 'skin' of the costume. Sewn thread was clearly visible on the eyes and the body, and someone had seen fit to put gemstones all over it. Plus, it had tiny wings, though these seemed to be part of the cyan creature in the front part of the body.

Hmm...four legs four legs four legs four legs.... AHA! PONIES!

Wait, ponies? Why are they here?

What confused me more was how they weren't attracting any attention. Despite all the obvious evidence to the contrary, none of the other dragons seemed to notice anything different about the oddly shaped mass of fabric and thread that vaguely resembled a lizard with wings.

Hey Manty! I need your help here.

Ugh, what is it?! You've barely been gone ten minutes!

Are the dragons on friendly terms with the ponies?

Take a wild guess.

Well, there are two or three of them hiding in a dragon costume right in the middle of everything. A horrible costume, I might add. They might as well be wearing a t-shirt that says 'I'm not a dragon' in big red letters.

Then they ether have a death wish or are bored out of their skulls. What do you need my help for?

What should I do?

Do? I don't see the need to 'do' anything. Whatever you want, I guess.

You're grumpy, I can tell. Have you been sleeping the whole entire time I've been gone?

I've been trying to, but even I can't fall asleep in ten minutes. I'm going to attempt it again, so don't contact me unless someone I may or may not care about is dying.

Talking with you always cheers me up.

Goodnight Flame.

Well that got me nowhere. On the one hand, this was a group of ponies that wasn't supposed to be here and certainly didn't want to be discovered (I think). On the other hand, they seemed intensely interested in the kid-dragon that I had been about to protect, which was ether a good or a not-so-good thing.

Time for another one of my brilliant ideas.

I walked up to the costume and said “Hi there!” rather loudly.

All the ponies inhabiting the costume (there were three of them, I think) jumped at least five feet into the air and let out a very eloquent “AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!”, forgetting they were in a confined area. The result was a very good impersonation of a dragon doing the wave with its entire body while screaming.

Which, of course, ended with a crazy heap of fabric and limbs as they hit the ground. Yep, best idea ever.

It took about ten minutes, a hushed argument, and lots of tripping and falling before they were able to get themselves balanced again. They then turned on me, using a very deep voice that was obviously fake and yet succeeded in disguising the gender of the speaker.

“Hey! What do you think you doing?!”

I took this opportunity to take a look at the head. It's mouth had been left open, leaving a viewing port, and I could make out a shape inside. Again, I couldn't pinpoint the gender, but I could tell that one, it was a pony, and two, it had a horn on its forehead. Unicorn than.

“Scaring you. I should think that would be obvious.”

“Huh? Why?”

“Well, I can think of no other reason why I would suddenly-”

“Not that. Why were you trying to scare me?”

“Ummmmmmmm...for fun?”

“Well stop it! Or I'll...uh...I'll knock you halfway across the valley!”

“Might want to get outta that costume first. You can barely stand as it is.”

This completely threw the unicorn off track.

“C-costume? I d-don't know what you're t-talking about.”

I mentally smiled. Bulls-eye.

“You don't? Then let me tell you a new joke I just heard. You are in the home of the dragons dressed in a dragon costume along with two of your friends. A random dragon comes up and starts talking to you, and he knows who you really are. What do you do?”

“T-two of my what? I don't know what you mean...”

“Okay, think of it this way: since when do dragons have eight legs? Each ending with a hoof?” I put emphasize on the word 'hoof''.

The unicorn stuttered for a few seconds, trying to come up with a response, before eventually realizing that it was hopeless. When it spoke next, the fake voice was gone, replaced by a unmistakably female one that was trying to sound confident and utterly failing at it.

“Okay, dragon. You've caught us. But I feel it necessary to warn you that I am the prized student of Princess Celestia. If any harm were to befall me or my friends, the princess will be notified and I doubt she will be very happy.”

Ohhh, playing the 'big brother' card, are we? Well you're not the only one that can play mind games.

“You may inform the dear princess, in the most polite way possible, that I could really care less. Now here's something for you to think about. This valley is full of dragons unaware of your being here, a fact that I can change whenever I feel like it. However, I'd rather not, so why don't you just answer my questions and save yourself the trouble of outrunning 50 or so dragons? You seem to be making quite a big deal out of a friendly interrogation.”

Before the unicorn could answer, a much different yet still female voice spoke up from the group of cyan legs that made up the front half of the body.

“Hey bub! If you know whats good for you, back off! I ain't afraid to get tough with a dragon.”

I glanced downward and saw, very much to my surprise, a pair of violet eyes glaring back at me.

Wait, are those...?

I deadpanned. “Please tell me those aren't eye-holes.”

“Well, yeah.” The unicorn sounded a bit more sheepish now. “She was kind of adamant about being able to see where she was going...”

“And you actually thought this would work!? I can't even began to understand the reasoning behind that!”

“To be fair, it was working pretty well until you came along.”

“Yeah, and that has me rather worried. Are dragons here usually this unobservant?”

“I wouldn't know. This is...well...our first visit. Why, are you not from here?”

“You could say that. Which brings me to my first question: why are you guys here? You don't seem like the type to just wander into enemy territory. Except maybe your blue friend with the eye-holes.”

“I CAN hear you y'know!”

“Clearly. So what is it? Business? Pleasure? Tactical insertion?”

“I don't know what that last one is, but we are here to...help a friend, let us say.”

“A friend? You mean the kid over there?” I pointed to the little dragon I had been distracted from, who had managed to convince the teenagers to at least give him a chance and was now engaged in a belching contest. Which basically consisted of each dragon blowing huge fireballs into the air.

Hmm, he doesn't know when to quit does he? I'm gonna have to do something about that soon.

“Yes.” replied the unicorn. “How did you know?”

“You guys aren't exactly subtle when you spy on someone.”

“Oh...”

“What kind of 'help' are we talking about here?”

“We're keeping on eye on him, making sure things don't get out of hand.”

I resisted the urge to guffaw. “And what do you ponies think you're gonna do if things do indeed 'get out of hand'? Do I have to remind you yet again where you are?”

The cyan pony decided to speak up again. “We know our plan, and it ain't any of YOUR business! So I'm telling you again, BACK OFF! Unless you think you can take on the fastest mare in Equestria!”

“So you're just gonna wing it? Okay, I can respect that. Out of curiosity though, why this kid?”

“What?” It was back to the unicorn.

“Why would you go to the trouble to protect this particular kid, who isn't even the same species as you? And why do you refer to him as a 'friend'?”

“Because he is also not from here, and because he is.”

“...

I don't pretend to completely understand that, but it satisfies my curiosity anyway. Now, one last question before I depart to my earlier business: Where did you get that costume? To be quite frank, it sucks.”

The group of white legs that represented the back didn't really approve of this comment, and responded in an extremely posh voice that was, yet again, female.

“Why you ignorant ruffian! I'll have you know that this costume is entirely hoofmade, and could pass for a real dragon any-day! It certainly looks better than your ugly mug!”

“Ouch. That hurts.”

“GOOD!”

“Well, if your finished insulting my looks, then I must be off. There are a few dragons whose behavior I must...remedy. Feel free to enjoy the show. I'm sure it will be most entertaining to watch.”

“Wait, what are you...”

I didn't hear the rest of what she said, as I was by then halfway to the group of teenagers.

Now, you may think that I was being stupid, going all solo tough guy like that, but the truth was I actually had some idea of what I was doing. I had run into guys like this before, whether at school or at the orphanage, and the same thing always happened. I would mind my own business until A.) they tried to pick on me, or B.) they tried to pick on someone who couldn't fight back. Then I would go in no holds baring. It didn't always work (the last time I had challenged a group, I came away with a broken nose and a minor concussion, not enough to cause permanent damage but enough to spend the next week in the orphanage nurse's office), but this time I had a secret weapon.

Chaos magic, if you fail me now, I swear...

I must not have taken that long talking, because the teens were still doing their belching contest, blowing fireball after fireball into the air. A big fat brown dude had just placed the record, blowing a huge torrent of flame that engulfed the entire group of onlookers. When the flame ceased, the dragons were left without as much as a burn.

So dragons are immune to fire? Probably should've guessed that.

“Think you can beat that, peewee?” The leader growled at the kid.

The kid gulped audibly, and stood in front of the group. He looked like he was going to throw up for a few seconds, but then he burped and let out a tiny green fireball, which twisted and formed into a sealed scroll before floating to the ground.

The kid knows transportation fire-breath. Whoda thunk?

The leader immediately snatched up the letter and opened it. He read the first few lines, muttering to himself, before his eyes widened and he started laughing.

“Ha! Get this guys! Spike's pen pals with the namby pamby pony princess!” This was followed by torrents of laughter.

Namby pamby pony princess!? Oh, you have got to be shitting me.

I decided my time had come to interrupt the term of events and change them into my favor. And so, I made myself known.

“Namby pamby pony princess? Dude, if you're going to insult someone, at least make them good insults!”

He spun around, and his eyes fell on me, leaning against the rock wall and smirking at him.

“Hey! Watch it pal! Don't you know who you're talking to?”

I raised an eyebrow. “Dude, I've only been here four days. I don't know anybody.”

“Ah, a new guy huh? Well I guess I can let you off the hook this time. But here's some advice: I'm head honcho around here. Whatever I say goes, goes, got it?”

I pretended to consider. “And if I don't feel like it?”

He grinned. “Than you become our new punching bag.”

Not exactly subtle, is he?

“Oh, so its like that now, is it?”

“Yeah, pretty much. So, what do ya say?”

“ I say go to hell.”

All the other dragons gasped, and the leader became a little uncertain. I guess challenges to the leader were rarer than I thought.

The uncertainty vanished from the leader's face, and was replaced by his trademark sneer. “Well, I guess we'll have to remedy that, won't we?”

By now he was right in front of me, and he started off with a classic right hook to the face. I reached one arm up and blocked it, using the other fist to punch him in the jaw. As he was dazed, I grabbed his arm and in one fluid motion put him in an arm-lock. I banged his head against the rock wall a couple of times than threw him to the ground and resumed my earlier position, all the while with a bored expression on my face.

He slowly got up and shook his head, glaring at me. “How did you...?”

“What can I say? You suck at fighting dude.”

He growled and came at me again.

I didn't want to prolong this any longer than necessary, so I dodged his first blow and responded by punching him in the gut. This caused him to immediately bend over, winded, and I took the opportunity to fly up a few feet and kick him in the head. He stumbled back and I finished by grabbing his face and kneeing it. He fell to the ground and didn't get back up.

However, that is not to say he was unconscious. Far from it. He was down for the count, but that didn't stop him from looking at his cronies and yelling “Well? What are you waiting for? GET HIM!”

Which of course prompted all the other teens to surround me and close in.

“Well...fuck.” I muttered as the first guy got to me.


You see, I am pro at one-on-one fist fights. Having only one person to focus on makes it easy to predict the other guy's moves, not to mention the fact that the leader had been careless and hadn't really treated me with caution like he should have. However, ten-on-one fights are completely different. If you focus all your attention on one guy, your leaving yourself open for attack from any other direction. The trick is to broaden your focus to include everyone around you.

Suffice to say, I suck at that.

The first guy swung at me and I dodged it, sticking out one foot and tripping him. I swept my foot forward and kicked the next guy, who happened to be the fat brown dude. My foot met his stomach and he wheezed, stumbling backward into several other dragons. I forgot to watch my back though, and some blonde purple dude (yes, it was a guy) took advantage of this lack of defense to deliver a kick to my spine.

From then on, things went rather badly.

I spun around and thanked the blonde dude by punching him in the face, and in that brief moment some asshole decided to try and tackle me. Problem was, it worked, and I went down. I took care of the guy who had done it, a white guy with light red spines, but when I tried to get back up the leader (who had somehow regained his footing) kicked me in the chest, winding me. As I tried to regain my breath, I was beset upon be kicks from all sides.

Have you ever wondered how it feels to be the center of a bunch of gang-stomping? Let me tell you, it is not fun.

By the time they stopped, I had several large bruises forming and was coughing up small amounts of blood. The leader walked up and knelt down next to me.

“Not so cocky now, huh loser?”

“Actually, I'm remembering the expression you had on when I introduced your face to a rock wall.”

He responded by delivering a vicious kick to my chest, which made me cough up even more blood.

“So, have we learned a lesson today?”

“Yes.” My voice was barely audible.

“What was that again?”

“Yes!” I clenched my fist.

“I can't heeeeear you!”

“YES!” I bet everyone in the valley heard it.

“And what, pray tell, was that?” He was smiling this whole time.

I slowly raised my head and met his eyes, the very picture of defeat. All of the onlookers, including the kid, the disguised ponies, and several dragons had all gone silent.

Than I grinned and opened my fist, revealing the dark cloud that had been charging there, waiting to be released. “Chaos magic is awesome.”

“Wait, wha-”

I slammed my hand, palm downward, into the ground. A shockwave of dark energy blew outward from me, picking up all the teenagers and hurling them back about twenty feet. The leader, who was closest, got the brunt of it full in the face. It must have reignited my earlier punishments, because when he landed he clenched his head in both hands and started moaning.

I slowly got up, wincing whenever I disturbed one of my bruises, and made my way toward the moaning leader. One of the teens, the blonde dude, had gotten back up and attempted to charge me again. I flicked my hand, and another wave of darkness sent him flying all the way back to the rock wall, where he stayed for a few minutes before slowly sliding down. This discouraged any other would-be fighters.

When I finally came to the spot where the leader lay, he was still moaning. I used my magic to lift him up and slam him against the cliff face, where he stayed suspended.

“Alright, I'm not the kind of guy that holds grudges, so I'll just lay down a few ground rules. One, don't pick on kids. Two, learn some good insults. And three, don't. Ever. Fucking. Touch me. Again. Got it?”

He moaned in response.

“Yeah, I thought so.”

I released my magic and he slide down to rest on the floor, where he resumed holding his head.

I heard clapping, and turned to find the entire audience of dragons (about 15 of them had wandered over to watch the fight) applauding me. The kid and the disguised ponies, though, were staring at the group of teens, most of which were still on their backs or stomachs. They appeared utterly shocked at what they had just witnessed.

“Thank you, thank you! It's nice to know my work is appreciated!” I called out, before slowly making my way to the kid. He had managed to drag his eyes away from the fallen
teens and was watching me with a new sense of respect, though he was still quite nervous.

“Hey kid!” I said as I got close to him. “What's your name? I don't think I caught it before.”

“S-Spike.” He stuttered. He glanced back to the fallen dragons. “H-how did you do that?”

“Oh, that? Its just a cool little trick I've learned. It comes in handy quite often, actually. Are you new here? I don't think I've seen you before.”

“Y-yeah. I actually just got here today.”

“I was wondering why you were carrying a traveler's bag. Exactly what were you trying to accomplish by talking to these guys?” I gestured to the group, most of whom were still laying there.

He blushed. “I-I was trying to find out what it means to be a dragon.”

I snorted. “From these assholes? That's gotta be the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life. Of all the dragons in this valley, why did you have to pick the group of bullies?”

“They were the youngest ones I could find!” He said defensively. “All the other ones were too big and scary!”

I glanced over at the nearest dragon. He was much taller than me, had huge wings, large teeth, and was entertaining himself by melting down rocks with his breath. It took him about ten seconds per rock.

“Okay, point taken. Why though?”

“Why what?”

“Why would you be trying to find out what it means to be a dragon when you already are one?”

“Well...I recently found out I'm not like most dragons.”

“How so?”

“I'm not fierce enough! All my friends call me cute and adorable! Dragons aren't cute or adorable! Dragons are fierce, dragons are powerful, dragons are cool, dragons are majestic. Like...like...” He paused. “Well, like you actually.”

I chuckled. “Majestic is hardly a word I would use to describe me.”

“But you're fierce! You're powerful! You're cool! I'm...I'm not any of those.”

“Hey, I think you're pretty cool. And about the fierce and powerful thing, you're a kid dude. Nobody expects you to be those things. I would understand if you were my age and still drinking milk out of a bottle, but you're not. You're a kid. And one of the advantages of being a kid is that you don't have to worry about stuff like that.”

He brightened. “You think so?”

“Absolutely. I assume these 'friends' you speak of are a helluva lot nicer than these guys, right?”

“Oh, yeah.”

“Good, than go back to them and don't worry about being fierce until you hit puberty.”

I stretched. “Well, I must be going. I have places to go and things to do. I'll see ya around Spike!”

As I walked away, He called out to me. “Wait!”

I looked back at him.”Yeah?”

He hesitated for a moment. “Can I come with you?”

“Why?”

“I know you said I don't really need to worry about those things, but I haven't really accomplished what I set out to do. I wanna see how a real dragon behaves. That, and you're the only dragon here who's not a big meanie, so...”

I thought about it for a minute.

“Okay sure, if you want. I gotta warn you though, I'm not staying here. I'll probably set off through the Everfree, cause I don't really have a destination in mind. Plus, I have a rather unusual traveling companion. And I don't mean you.”

“Wait, you don't have anywhere to go?”

“Not really. I just got here a few days ago and I'm mostly been trying to learn the landscape. Get my bearings and all that.”

“Well, I might have a place in mind, but you may not like it.”

“I'm always open for suggestions.”

“It's the place where I grew up. It's my home, the guys who live there are friendly, and its a nice place to go if you want to relax. There's only one thing.” And at this he paused.

“The place is called Ponyville. I think you can figure out the rest.”

“Ah, ponies. I have nothing against ponies, but are your sure they'll like me? I thought they weren't on very good terms with dragons.”

“I'm guessing some of them will be afraid of you, but if you're with me than I should be able to convince them to give you a chance.”

I thought about it. It was a good idea, but it would take some work for Spike to convince a group of ponies to let me stay in their town. And even if he did, they would all be nervous around me cause I was a teenage dragon, not a cute little dragon like Spike. My attitude was fine, but my looks just killed it.

Unless, of course, I didn't look like a dragon.

I grinned. “Maybe, Spike. Maybe. But I think I have a better idea...”

-End of Chapter 5-

A/N: For those of you who care, yes, that was the 'Dragon Quest' episode.