A/N: Sorry for the wait. I've been really busy being lazy, and school hasn't really been kind to me.
Also! The new OC in this chapter belongs to The Red blade from FanFiction.net. Thanks man! :)
I don't own MLP, Hasbro does. :( Enjoy! Please Read + Review!
As soon as we hit the woods, things got complicated.
First of all, these woods were dark. I mean unnaturally dark. It was broad daylight outside of the forest, but as soon as we stepped inside it became dusk.
Also, we weren't following a trail. In fact, there wasn't any trails that I could see. Just forest. This didn't seem like a problem for the first five minutes of walking, as Manty just demolished everything in front of us, but after those five minutes I heard an ominous creaking and shuffling sound behind us.
I immediately turned around, searching for the source of the noise. I didn't see any movement that would suggest a creature, but what I did see scared the crap outta me.
About nine feet away from us, the huge trail that Manty had blazed simply ended. The trees and bushes that he had destroyed not five minutes ago had all grown back, with absolutely no sign that they had recently been crushed. I couldn't even see through them to the outside, which shouldn't have been more then 15 feet away.
Yeah, that's not creepy or anything...
I jogged back up to Manty, who was still furiously blazing a trail as though his life depended on it.
Great choice of words Flame.
"Hey Manty!"
"Yeah?"
"Have you looked behind us recently?"
"No, why?"
"Maybe you should now."
He glanced behind us and gave the closest thing to a smile that a manticore can give.
"Don't worry, the forest always does that. Just one of its many little challenges."
"That doesn't exactly reassure me."
"Have you ever been to the Everfree before?"
"Can't say I have."
"Right, well then you should know that the Everfree Forest is probably the most abnormal forest you can find. It's usually dangerous for newcomers, as they are unfamiliar with the challenges they will face, but since you have me your lucky. I've been through this forest a thousand times, so I know how to navigate it."
"You talk about it as though it were alive."
"In a way, it is. The forest itself isn't alive of course, but the entire area is controlled by a kind of spirit that lives in the Everfree itself."
"A spirit you say?"
"I know you don't believe me, but its true. I've met her a few times. She's rather protective of her forest, hence the challenges I mentioned. If you pass them, you have earned the right to travel through her forest. If you don't, you're basicly screwed. The ignorant ponies don't know this of course. They think this place is just haunted, and few of them tread through it. She never reveals herself to the ones who do."
"Do you think she will reveal herself to us?"
"Possibly. She mainly shows herself to wild animals like me, but she has been known to contact dragons before. If we do meet her, you MUST be polite. Most dragons treat her forest with scorn, so she probably won't act friendly towards you."
"Greeeeeaaaaat..."
"Look on the bright side! Your with me, and we should only be in this forest for a couple of days."
I decided to take his word for it. I wasn't about to contradict a manticore, let alone the only intelligent being I'd seen so far. Plus, I was still comprehending everything he'd said. If I presumed he was telling the truth, that meant one of two things. Either manticores had a crazy religion, or this place was less like home then I thought.
We walked for several more hours, during which I became rather tired.I hated hikes back on Earth and apparently my new body hated them just as much. I was about to suggest we stop when Manty did just that, making me bump into him.
"What's happening?"
"Nothing, just getting my bearings."
"Bearings? Just how big is this forest?"
"It's big, but I'm just figuring out where we are. No big deal."\
Five minutes passed.
"Are we lost?"
"No, I just don't recognize this place."
"Yeah, we're lost."
"Well if you want to look at it that way, fine. All we have to do is keep going. I'll recognize something sooner or later."
We continued walking and kept at it for about an hour, during which I became increasingly nervous. The trail Manty was blazing continued to close up behind us, making retracing our steps impossible. Instead of thining out, the forest became denser and more oppressive the more we continued. More then once I thought we were being watched, but when I reported this to Manty he told me it was just the creatures of the forest.
"They will not bother us. They know not to mess with a manticore."
When the hour was up, I was positive that coming into the forest had been a bad idea.
"Recognize anything yet?"
"Nope. You were right, we are lost."
"Crap."
"However, I think I know why."
He turned around and I saw that for the first time, Manty looked genuinely worried.
"I think its the tree spirit. She's messing with the forest."
"...which means...?"
"Only one reason: she doesn't want us to leave."
"Is that good or bad?"
"I'm guessing bad. If she just wanted to talk to us she could have simply appeared..."
"So now we have the almighty spirit of the trees mad at us for an unknown reason."
"Pretty much."
"And this is all assuming that I believe in the existence of said tree spirit."
He glared at me for a moment, then smiled, revealing very large fangs.
"If you don't believe me, go ahead. Challenge the tree spirit! It would be rather entertaining to watch you try."
Now if there is one thing I know about myself, its that I am a hardcore atheist. I did not believe in any kind of higher power, and though I did believe in an afterlife, it was mostly for the reason that I couldn't stand the thought that we simply ended when we died. I most certainly did not believe in any kind of tree spirit, and I was itching to prove Manty wrong about this.
I walked a few feet away from Manty, put on my fierce face that I only used for special occasions, and began the art of dissing the great spirit of the trees.
"Hey! You there! My friend here thinks you exist, but you know what? I DON'T! This is just another creepy old forest to me. You wanna prove me wrong? The reveal yourself! Show me your so-called power, or are you too proud to prove that you exist?"
As I suspected, absolutely nothing happened.
Manty laughed. "She will not show herself if all you do is ask rather un-politely. You will have to get her attention for her to even talk to you."
The phrase 'get her attention' triggered an idea in my mind. A really, REALLY stupid idea, but an idea nonetheless.
I turned back to Manty and as I turned I called over my shoulder.
"Well if there is no great tree spirit, then I guess no one will mind if I test my flames out on one of these trees!"
The effect was instantaneous.
A branch-a very heavy branch I might add- near me sprang to life and bent sharply, catching me full in the face. The impact lifted me off my feet and I hit the ground hard, rolling over and over until I came to a stop right in front of Manty.
I looked up at him groggily. He was looking at me with amusement, a huge grin on his face.
"Well," I managed to crook."you were right about one thing. She's pissed at us."
"Yes." His face turned serious again. "And what you almost did probably made her TWICE as pissed."
-Was closing up your path not enough proof, creature of chaos?-
The voice sounded in my head. I didn't pay it much attention though, as my face was still hurting. Instead, I focused on slowly getting to my feet, using Manty as support. As soon as I got my basic senses back, I looked at the branch that had punched me. It was frozen in mid-blow, still and stiff as all the other trees around it.
-I can make it attack you again you know.-
"Please don't." Then I realized who I was talking to. "Hey! What the hell? Get outta my head!"
-You are in no position to make demands of me chaos-user. You are lucky I don't kill you where you stand.-
"She's right you know."
I glared at Manty, who had just spoken.
"Excuse me?"
"Well you DID just threaten to burn down part of her forest..."
"I was trying to get her attention! I didn't MEAN it! And also, it worked."I grinned slightly. "She's talking to us now."
Apparently the tree spirit didn't like being manipulated because she had another tree branch attack my face again. I dropped to the ground again and groaned, clutching my face.
That's gonna leave a mark...
-I'm not looking for a fight chaos-user.-
"Yeah." I growled. "Yeah, it really seems like it."
-Leave peacefully, and I might consider sparing your life.-
"YOU might CONSIDER SPARING my LIFE!?! How about I CONSIDER not burning the shit out of your precious trees?! I'm the one getting the crap beaten outta me for no reason!!! Screw you and you goddamn forest!!! I'm getting the hell outta here and I WILL burn and destroy ANY tree that tries to touch me!!!"
I got up and strode towards the edge of Manty's path. I got maybe five feet before a small branch whipped out and stopped me.
-Wait.-
Smoke blew out of my nostrils and my vision got a red tint to it. "WHAT DID I JUST SA-"
My raging was interrupted by a sharp pain in my skull that made me fall (again) and clutch my aching head, screaming in pain.
It felt as though my skull was being pried apart. A vast presence entered my mind and started searching, going through all my memories, feelings, thoughts, and emotions. I knew it was the tree spirit, but I couldn't do crap to stop her as the pain was taking all my immediate attention. Even if I hadn't been in pain I doubt I could've done anything to prevent her from invading my head. She probably would've crushed any kind of mental attack I threw at her.
After about five minutes of screaming my head off and having my mind invaded by a crazy tree spirit, my head finally stopped hurting and the presence of the tree spirit withdrew.
I lay there, panting, taking in gulps of air before staggering to my feet. I limped over to Manty and leaned on him, panting some more and trying to get my head to stop smarting.
-I...apologize. I was too quick to judge.-
My head nearly exploded again.
"You APOLOGIZE!!??!! You beat the living shit outta me and then set my head on fire!!!
-Yes, I...suppose I could've been friendlier...-
"You bet your ass you could've!"
She made a small growling noise. -You are simply ASKING for another branch to the face.-
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, cut the crap. Where are you anyway?"
-You think I will reveal myself to you simply because you asked? Has 'Manty' as you call him taught you nothing?-
"You invaded my head and apparently know everything there is to know about me now. All I'm asking is to be able to actually SEE you. Is that to much to ask?"
-Well...I suppose not...-
I heard a rustle in the bushes next to me and turned to see one of the weirdest creatures I had ever seen since coming here stepping out.
My first thought was a horse?, but I immediately dismissed that idea. The creature was too slim, too short to be a horse. The correct term sprang to mind. A pony. However it was unlike any kind of pony I had seen before.First of all were the colors. Its coat was a lightish blue, running all the way from its feet to its head. Its mane was long and flowing, acting more like hair then a mane, and was the color of butter. Oddly enough, on both of its flanks was a small, detailed picture of a willow tree.More odd then that though was the horn poking through its mane and the wings folded across its back, both the same color as its coat. The pony looked at me, and in that movement I realized she was also slightly transparent. I could see the trees through her.
Upon seeing her, Manty immediately sank into a bow, muttering "Spirit of the trees". I, however, did not. I had no intention of bowing to a spirit that had just assaulted me three different times in the space of 20 minutes, plus I was still absorbing her appearance.
-Not exactly what you expected, is it?- she asked, smiling slightly. Her mouth didn't move when she spoke, her voice still sounding in my head.
"No. No, definitely not."
-As you said before, I know you're memories. I know how different your world is from this one. I'm surpised your dealing with it so well, actually.-
I let out a faint laugh. "Yeah, well, I haven't really given myself time to dwell on it. I've been focused on...other things"
-Indeed.-
Manty had been looking back and forth between us, and he finally focused on me, a confused look on his face.
"What? Don't they have alicorns where your from?"
I laughed again, a full laugh this time.
"No. In fact, where I'm from doesn't have talking ponies at all. Or manticores, for that matter."
His eyes widened. "Really?"
"Yeah...its kinda hard to explain..."
-I believe, Strongjaw,- interrupted the tree spirit. -that it would be easier to SHOW you.-
Manty kept the confused face for a moment, then seemed to realize what she meant.
"Oh. Well I suppose that would be alright..."
The tree spirit's horn glowed a faint blue color, which made me step back, more then a little nervous. She, however, directed the horn at Manty. A thin tendril of the blue light extended from the tip of it and connected with Manty's forehead.
Manty's eyes immediately glazed over and he sat on his haunches, staring into space.
I got closer and waved a hand in front of his face. No reaction.
"What did you do to him?"
-I am simply showing him your memories of your world.-
"Oh, oka- wait, ALL my memories?!"
-No.- she giggled. -No, not ALL.-
I glared at her. "Was it really necessary to read my whole entire mind?"
-No.- she admitted. -But I have been bored these past few years. Hardly anything has happened, and your memories should provide some useful entertainment.-
I stared at her. "You're going to watch my memories for fun."
-Yes. Is there something wrong with that?-
"Where should I begin?"
Our conversation was cut short when the blue light vanished and Manty woke up.
"WHOA!!!" He sprang up, focused on me, stared at me wild-eyed for about 30 seconds, then seemed to calm down and said in a normal voice. "You said where you came from was different, but I didn't think it was...THAT different."
"You okay?"
"Yeah, yeah, I'm just...dealing with it..."
"You don't look okay."
"I'll be fine."
"If you say so. I hope you'll still accompany me to the dragon's mountain."
"Oh yes, I will. You still saved my life, and that is a debt that cannot be repaid easily. Its just that...well, holy crap man! Your world is WEIRD!"
"Yes. Yes, I suppose it is."
-Wait a minute, you plan to travel to the home of the dragons?-
"Yes."
-I'm not sure that's a good idea.-
"Why not? I woke up in this world as a dragon. Shouldn't I familiarize myself with my new species?"
-Yes, but most dragons are not like you. As a rule, dragons in this world are decidedly...violent.-
"...which means...?"
-Do not tell me you haven't felt it, because I know you have. When you woke up in this world, you did not panic when you realized you were in an unknown location and and you were only mildly surprised when you discovered you were a dragon. You were quick to travel into unknown territory and did not flee from Strongjaw when you saw him. When you understood his words you immediately tried to communicate. You are only mildly shocked at my appearance and you were quick to get angry when I attacked you. All of these mindsets, no fear, taking chances, and fighting back are all the instincts of a dragon. If you had been in your human form you would've felt intense fear and confusion, taken no chances, and probably never even entered my forest in the first place. These dragon instincts may have only changed you slightly, but normal dragons have them since the day they are born, so they basically shape their lives. When ponies raise a baby dragon as their own, which is not uncommon, They use a spell to erase those instincts and replace them with the instincts of a pony, or in your world, a human. Unaltered however, normal dragons are powerful and unpredictable, always fighting amongst themselves. That is why I think it would be a bad idea for you to go to them.-
As I absorbed what she said I realized she was right. I had changed. There was no way I would've acted the way I did back on Earth. One thing she had said though still bothered me.
"Okay, I just thought of two questions I need to ask you. First of all, why the hell did you attack us when you found us here?"
She bowed her head.
-I sensed an...unnatural...power within you, one that I haven't felt since Discord escaped his prison. Chaos. It is the same power that allowed you both to free Strongjaw and to talk to him. Despite what you think, manticores cannot speak your language. It is chaos magic that allows you to understand him. I assumed the worst, and for that I am sorry. Your power is your own, and I should not judge you because of it. I'm not certain, but if you wish to know more about it I would suggest reading more of that book you have. It should provide some answers.-
"Thank you, and now second question: Manty's real name is Strongjaw?"
She blinked. -Yes...-
I looked over at Manty. He was glaring at me, as if daring me to make fun of his name.
"I'll still call you Manty."
"Thank you."
I turned back to the tree spirit only to see her walking back into the trees.
-I will allow you passage through my forest Flamesinger, but be on your guard. If others know you're power, especially the ponies, they will most likely assume the worst as I did.-
"Hey wait!" I said. "You never told us your name!"
She stopped and looked back at us, her transparent eyes boring into mine for a moment.
A looooonnnnnng moment.
-My name...is Tienn- she finally said. -And something else before I leave you.-
A ball of blue light collected on the tip of her horn and then broke off, drifting through the air before landing in my out-stretched hand, where it was absorbed into my skin.
-The knowledge of flight, Flamesinger. Use it well.-
-End of Chapter 3-
Tracking. But needs more ponies.
awesome
The only thing about this chapter that nags at me is the whole overriding dragon instincts with magic thing. Spike is the very definition of a dragon raised by ponies, and he's dealt with draconic instincts rather frequently.
>Turned into a dragon
Dream come true
>No ponies yet
It's okay as long as there's mlp stuff and they meet ponies eventually
>Turned into a dragon
Dream come true
>No ponies yet
It's okay as long as there's mlp stuff and they meet ponies eventually
479434 Yeah, glad you noticed that.
479474 Yeah, but compared with normal dragons? Haven't you seen the Dragon Quest episode?
480181 I don't see that sort of behavior as instinctual, I see it is cultural. Compare it to the difference between a teenager that's been raised properly by their parents and one that's been "raised" by being plonked in front of a tv or outside and subsequently ignored.
I HAVE AN IDEA!
WRITE WHILE YOU POOP!
I'm being completely serious...
Oh sweet! Now he can fly?! =D
Reminds me a good rpg game scenario.
If Tienn read all of his memories, couldn't he have asked her what his name was.
Or was his name not in the memories she saw?
Hm...
Premise... Plausible. Can be done well..
Unfamiliarity with flight. Good.
Manticore.
Not asking why the ponies would net a manticore...
First 3 chapters... Show don't tell.
Magical tree alicorn ponies don't know about...
Cheap copout on the whole flight thing.
I'll give it two more chapters and see what I see.
913148
I mostly agree about not wondering why the manitcore was netted. But I think the forest alicorn is quite interesting, and raises some questions that could have interesting answers. Surely Celestia and Luna knows about her? Why does she hide from the other ponies? Presumably she's cool with Zecora, does she know about Tienn, but doesn't tell the others (why)? Properly set up, these are the kind of world building markers that make a reader want to continue.
Kind of a cop out on the 'leaning to fly' thing. Perhaps Tienn could have assured him that he could physically fly but would need to learn and train. I imagine the teenage dragons wouldn't be all that helpful, but a certain cyan pony would be interested in a dragon she could (for now) best in the flying department.
This story needs more your/you're editing, to be honest.
Use your when you speak of something owned: Your leg, your hand, your luck. "Your luck has run out!"
Use you're when you speak of the contraction 'you are'. You're going, you're leaving, you're pretty. "You're the ugliest thing I've seen so far!"
"Use it well"
...
*Fucks around in the air for an hour straight*
Like a boss
images4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20100522031544/dragonball/images/thumb/3/3e/TienGokusSpecialTechnique.png/180px-TienGokusSpecialTechnique.png
Forest Spirit, in her true form.
wat
1148525
Exactly my though process.
FanFiction.net to Fimfiction.
It's like Earth to Equestria.
HMMMM.
That forest spirit is a reeeaaaal jerk.
Mind reading and memory sharing is a very weak plot device. You also have no idea when to use "your" and when to use "you're". There are at least three times where you used the incorrect form, and that was before I went down to here to point them out. That was when the tree spirit shared Flameheart's memories.
I am seriously dissapointed.
Honestly, after she did that, I would have destroyed the entire Everfree Forest and, when she revealed herself, I would have slowly eaten her.
Then you know what humans do when we get pissed or see something as a threat or just feel particularly violent. I suggest you grovel, bitch.
Oh WOW are you wrong! It's almost funny how badly you got it! Everything you said about the dragons before the above quote applies to humans, too. Humans always take chances, constantly! While he would feel fear and confusion, he would quickly focus on what to do to survive and go through with tenacity. As a human, he would probably have simply gotten a long stick and shoved it through the sleeping manticore's eye to its brain, not woken it up. Don't talk about what you don't have even the faintest hint of comprehension, fool. Underestimate humans at your own peril. Every species on Earth has learned that the hard way, you will, too, if you keep up your thinking.
Are you seriously saying that the instincts of a prey species that is close to the bottom of the "big animals" food chain has the same instincts as the apex predator? Really? Ponies let their fear control them, humans get violent when frightened or angry and destroy whatever scares them with brutal efficiency. Geez, you have his memories yet you know nothing of humans at all. Probably because his memories are unlikely to show what humans are truly capable of. All you have to go on is seeing his life in a domestic, non-threatening environment. You, spirit, are a fool to apply that to a unknown, hostile environment. He does not have dragon instincts, he has human instincts. You confused the two because they are so similar, though there are differences. For example, a dragon would not have helped the manticore, or even opened dialogue in the first place.
Those evil bastards!
Gee, what species do we all know that sounds like?
3496817 but then the amazing story wouldn't progress... Oh dear what would we do then?! XD
Da da da daaaaaaaaaa!
You've received "the knowledge of flight" you can now fly...
Basically
Knowledge of Flight... this reminds me of a certain goddess.
5554841 palutena from kid icarus?
vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/kidicarus/images/5/50/Charaimg_02p.png/revision/latest?cb=20120413135101
5068756 Fallout equestria anyone? *gunshots in the distance* Oh Merde, THE FUCKING RAIDERS ARE AT IT AGAIN! CALAMITY!!! GRAB YER SADDLE! *picks up scoped hunting rifle and runs out of the room*
3496817 I'm going to take a wild guess and say, humans? Also, you have trees forest witch, wwe have nukes. Think on that for a second.
5754262
fuck fallout equestria to hell
This place makes me think of an RPG on Rampant mode.
NPC's that figure you out and give you a beginner's bonus while telling you what to avoid in the world.
If a tree spirit could beat the shit outta him just like this from a first assumption, I can't imagine what our dear old Sunbutt is gonna react with.
3496817
Replace 'Dragon' with 'Human' and the puzzle piece fits.
That's nice
8596589
I like grimdark shit, but Fallout: Equestria is stupid.
This story so far feels contrived.
I agree with FOXTrot that this feels like the setup for an RPG, but that's not a good thing imo.
The MC feels like a placeholder, which is good for video games where the player's decisions influence the story, but terrible when put into writing.
Also, regarding worldbuilding, I don't think it's been handled very well so far. This random tree alicorn's only purpose so far seems to be an exposition dump to establish the fundamentals of how the world works. She is basically a tutorial and I'm not a fan of that kind of storytelling.
I'll read on a bit more before deciding if I want to drop this or not. I'm running out of good human transformed stories and am starting to get desperate.
EDIT: This was written back in 2012? I'll give it some slack seeing as all this was rather new back then and there were a lot of things left in the dark regarding world building.
Not gonna lie I would've torched the forest for the whole mind invasion thing.
And miss Tree Spirit acting like reading someone's life like that-- and in such an uncomfortable manner-- being nothing important wouldn't really help issues.
MC brushing it off in the same manner didn't exactly fill me with confidence.
While the story is interesting enough, the constant misuse of “your” and “you’re” is kinda immersion breaking. “Your” is the possessive version of “you”, like how “mine” is the possessive version of “me”. “You’re” is the shortening of “you” and “are”. An easy way to remember can be to remember how to pronounce them: “your” (j-oh-r), “you’re” (y-uh-r-eh).
I don't like the fact that the bitch just looked into the head without permission .....
10150957
If he still had his human instincts, and how the sanctity that is his last bastion of privacy, a.k.a his brain, has been breached, he would've went full on Manifest Destiny on the Everfree.