A Sniper in Equestria

by xXxJXTxXx

Chapter 8

-when the guards smack me towards the wall I let a pained yell. I pulled out the first weapon I could grab in my backpack, pulled it out and fired it, but when firing it I felt pain in front of me guessing it was an explosive that I pulled out. All the guards got off of me for only for me to see more guards coming through the hallway towards me. By instincts I push the top of the grenade launcher then started reloading it by pulling ammo out of my pockets-

"COME AT ME YOU WANKAS!!!!"

-they charged while I fired hitting them making them knocked out which is lucky enough for me because of their armor tore open by the explosion but luckily not hurting too much of the pony targeted. I fired and reloaded until I reloaded my last pipe bomb-

Crap, I need to get more ammo or maybe...

-I pull out the charge n' charge and the genuine ham shank then charged into a crowd of guards that started to panic at my sudden charge. I slammed the ham on their head to knock them out while pulling out my specialized ham to deal double the ponies at once. I look to see one pony remaining but with armor that looks fancier than the other guards-

"Surrender now monster!!" Yelled the pony.

"Wow first word that comes out of you is a monster, how typical. Oh look a strange creature that looks really threatening! Lets call it a monster because we don't know what it is!"

-I ranted while the pony listened then I saw the princesses watching the scene hidden but not hidden enough-

"Well then the names Silver, what's yours snow cone."

I mean his coat is not a marshmallow like the Rarity but also is like someone made a pony and just poured the raspberry juice on the hair and the tail.

"Well my name is Shining Armor and I have orders to bring you to the princesses!" Shining Armor said.

-I walk towards the walls then started slamming my head into it-

WHY. IS. THERE. NO. NORMAL. NAMES. BUT. NAMES. THAT. WAS. MADE. BY. SOME. 5 years old..

-I stop my slamming then walked towards shines who took a step back when I approached-

"Jeez, if you wanted to bring me to the princesses you could've asked because I was going their right now, until ten guards smacked me."

Guards used giga impact, it damaged Silver. Silver used grenade spam, it was super effective.

-Shining twitched his eye then got his composure back-

"I will take you to them, also you must be really dangerous if you could take down all the guards." Shining said.

"Really? In my world I had to face over 500 with only 5 people helping me."

-Shining then looked at me if I was crazy to see a look saying 'I'm telling the truth' he sighed while pulling out the grenade launcher which I fired purposely towards the direction of the princesses-

"Oops, accidentally pressed the trigger, but move forward because I heard the menu was cream spaghettis and I will eat it and I will enjoy it."

-we started walking towards the kitchen while the pipe bomb starts rolling around the corner to the two peaking princesses-

"What is this, it's flashing quicker by the sec-"

-the pipe bomb explodes causing the hair to stick out funny and their front coats black by the bomb. Upon hearing the explosion I started laughing while Shining looked at me curiously then just ignored me. Getting bored I tried to make a conversation-

"How ya doin."

"Good." Shining replied.

"Have any siblings?"

"Only one." Shining said.

"What's her fur color?"

"Lavender, why and how did you know she was a mare?" Shining asks.

"Well you would reply that your sister would be a brother if I said it wrong."

"That is true." Shining said.

-upon arriving at the doors of the cafeteria I said to shining-

"Oh I know who's your sister!"

"Oh really!?" Shining said.

"Eeyup, I'll even bet on it. I bet that if I guess your sister's name you have to do a solid for me and if I don't get it right I'll give a anything you want."

-I take out my hand while he thinks about it-

"Deal." Shining said taking my hand shaking it.

-I pull out my ham then I start speaking to it-

"Oh magical ham of greatness, the pony's name is Twilight Sparkle."

-upon hearing his sister's name his ears drop-

"How did you know?" Shining asks.

"You should always ask the person or should I say pony where they came first, as I came from ponyville first. So my favor is to wear this mask for the rest of the day until somehow some pony manages to rip it off, but you can't tell them you are Shining Armor."

-I give him the red sniper mask while he takes it and wears it-

"Fine I'll wear the mask, it's not like it will hurt me."

"Well goodbye and have a nice afternoon."

-I enter the dining room, while Shining stood outside-

"Well I don't know why he asked me to wear this mask but at least I'm able to see through it." Shining said to himself.

-he then hears flapping of wings before getting slammed by the unknown force knocking him out and his mask to fall out-

"Tia, we have been tricked once again." Luna said.

"Where is he, my patience is running low and I feel cranky." Celestia said rubbing her temples with her hooves.

"I bet a piece of cake will calm your nerves Tia." Luna said rubbing her sister's back.

"You're right, TO THE KITCHEN!!"

-after they dispatched paramedics to help the knocked out guards they open the door to the kitchens to see a specific human stuffing his face with spaghetti-

This is delicious, so delicious, why don't you stay in my mouth forever!

-I eat more while not noticing the looks from the princesses of amusement-

"Aunties! What happened to your manes and your coat also this human named Silver already ate 5 bowls of spaghetti without taking a break which is pretty surprising due to the amount of cake you eat in a short period of time." The pink pony said.

*10 minutes ago*

-I enter the kitchen to smell the scent of spaghetti cooking when I saw another pink alicorn looking at me curiously-

"Oh, uh, hello. My name is Silver and yours?"

"My name is Princess Mi Amore Cadenza but you can call me Cadance. Also what are you if I may ask." Cadance said.

"First I'm a human, second when is the spaghetti coming out, and third what kind of alicorn are you?"

"Well the spaghetti will come out in the next 3 minutes or so and I'm the princess of love." Cadence said.

I swear, if she marries the guy Shining Armor I will smack Celestia, invisible of course when she's not expecting it.

"Nice, well I think it's coming."

-the waiter give us plates looking at me nervously and bowing at Cadance the gave us the pasta, as soon as the waiter left I dug into the food with the fork beside me eating everything leaving none behind. Cadance looks at me in awe as I eat the food as fast as possible and looks at my surprisingly when I ordered seconds-

"What does the clock do when it's still hungry?"

"Umm I don't know, it gets more food?" Cadance answers.

"It goes back for seconds"

Oh my God that was the most horrible joke I've ever said. I hope I don't saw more stupid jokes when I'm still in this planet.

-she starts laughing at my joke while I heard some laughter inside the kitchen where more pasta being made-

Wow...the crowd today seems to be easy for me today.

-the pasta arrives again but the waiter to be friendlier than last time as I dug down into the food-

*present time*

-I finish the seventh bowl while I sat down at the chair looking at the ceiling until I noticed the presence of 2 other princesses in the room-

"Oh hey there guys, and I just love the way you did with your hair."

-I said these words as innocently as possible but to receive a glare from Celestia-

Do I want to escape or stay?

>Stay< Escape

-I stayed but to see Celestia take a deep breath then starts her long ass speech as I see Luna and Cadance escape from the torrent of words that crashed into me-

"You know how worried we were, we were trying to look everywhere for you. We tried our hardest to find you and this is how you repay us, you have got to be the most aggregating human that could be sent in here whil-" Celestia kept continuing her speech while I sat in the room being like a kid being scold by his mother.

-the lecture lasted for an hour while I managed to get the waiter a piece of cake while Celestia wasn't looking. When the waiter disappears back into the kitchen she turns towards me again continuing her lecture. Right when she looks away the waiter comes back with the cake which was a cheese cake and returned to the kitchen. As I was about to take my first bite Celestia notices the cake I'm about to eat-

"STOP!! Don't eat that cake, that's my cake!" Celestia yelled.

-I stopped my motion of eating the cake until I started to take the bigger piece and started to eat it-

"PLEASE NO, NOT MY CAKE!! ILL DO ANYTHING!" She yelled almost in verge of tears.

Why is she about to cry and how much does she love cake?

"Ok then, my deal is to let me go and I'll give you the cake."

"Deal, now gimme cake!" She screamed using her magic to take the cake away from me taking the whole piece with a single bite.

Loco

-I quietly go towards the door then upon reaching my destination I started banging loudly on the door to hear 2 ponies falling. I open the door to see Cadance and Luna on the floor holding onto their ears. I started walking back to my room luckily asking some maids that didn't run away from me the directions, upon arrival I see the cub asleep and an eaten fish. I slowly went in the bed and fell asleep quickly with a full belly-

Author's Note:

This chaper I had a brain fart so tell me if I made any mistakes or if a part of it made no sense at all.

Comments

[megamanzero]

the cub is so cute!!

[Faffs]

"This is delicious, so delicious, why don't you stay in my mouth forever!"
this line is unforgivable... you know what you've done. other than that, i enjoyed the chapter