• Member Since 1st Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen Jun 12th, 2012

Neo-00


E

In Michael's world he wasn't really a person that would get out there and try new things, our hero embarks on a new journey in Equestria to find his true love and live a long successful life

What will happen when Michael arrives in Ponyville?

Will he finally find the excitement and the experience hes been yearning for?

Or will there be a shocking twist at the end?

Questions, questions, questions.

What will the answer be?

Chapters (9)
Comments ( 16 )

I for one thought this was good. :moustache:

452659
Maybe it's just my extremely cynical and biased view towards each and every self-inert HiE in which EVERYONE acts the same more or less. Not because they are OOC on their own part, it's just that we are all the nice, shy, and willing people that we depict in every fic. No one wants to be a complete douche unless that's literally how they expect their own encounter with MLP would accumulate too.

So, apologies to Mr. Author here, my views run high and my expectations even higher.

Distrance you expect too much then
Not every story is a 5 million wordmmaster piece we unfortunately are not all 'the best authors going'

I thought it was a great introduction and can't wait for the rest of the story

Last paragraph
"I think some'pony' fancys you " :derpytongue2:

Good! Good! I truely do like this revision a whole lot more. There's not much more I can reiterate on other than just be careful with pacing, it's important to help visualize alot of scenes before moving on.

aaaww.. Michael and Fluttershy are such a cut couple! :heart:

haha yeah and I'm thinking of creating more stories now

I'll be waiting for the next chapter. This one looks good.

Luna's got a crush!~ Luna's got a crush's LOL:rainbowwild:

I want more of this


Sincerely the Doctor

In my opinion, you need to do some proofreading. I also think the format could be improved.

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