4186241 I'm not trolling, and if you try to ignore the problems with this story, you're not doing the author a favor. There's nothing wrong with pointing out errors so the author can improve. There's actually several groups dedicated to this practice, and I used to be a very active member in one of the oldest.
4185646 That said, DA here did get one thing right. Don't stop writing! I'm sure the fetish fuel was lovely, based on the upvote:downvote ratio on this story. I just don't know if I'll get to it
You clearly have a story you want to tell, but it's buried beneath, telly narration, bland descriptions, lighting fast pacing, and frankly, lazy writing. Sorry, I won't be able to finish this tonight, if ever.
^^^ What you said about the author putting too much non-story content in his/her chapters was not trolling. Pointing out what you think are flaws without giving suggestions on how to improve them, like above, is trolling in my book. Your intentions might of been to help the author, but to me, you came across as an elitist jerk. The administrators of this website have stated in the past, that simply listing flaws with a story without offering solutions isn't welcome on this site.
4186140 didn't he already kind of state the gem can effect other people's, sorry "pony's" minds? i know he did with pinkie pie as it said in either chapter 1 or 2 that pinkie felt something pushing her to help RD with her monstrous desire, who's to say it cant make her prey calmed or even want to be digested? I would find it strange if not one of these ponies woke up with such stimulus with out something effecting them mentally.
I wonder who Rainbow will eat next? Applejack and Rarity? (no sense keeping them apart from their sisters right), or will somepony find out and Pinkie helps Rainbow trick and eat them? Also, if the other times are any indication, after this feeding Dash is gonna be huge. I do hope this story continues, I don't know if I could handle the loss. This is good, sexy, fun, and dark all at once, I will faithfully wait for this story (though it luckily hasn't been too long). One fun part for me is, the author's note about "the quiet ones" (I love that line), why you ask? I am very quiet, and very twisted (and proud of it). I'd say more of my creepy thoughts related to this story but I don't think anyone really wants to hear 'em. Sorry if I've annoyed anyone, I'm just bored at the moment. To P-Wing Blade (love the name by the way), I love your work, very fun to read, in more ways than one.
Hello again my fellow readers, I was just reading my earlier comment when I realized the perfect character for "somepony finds out but Pinkie somehow helps Rainbow eat them before they can warn anypony", Twilight Sparkle. Like for example, what if Rarity were to visit Fluttershy, gets eaten, then Twilight visits and sees a full Rainbow Dash, knows about the gem enough to guess what happened, teleports to the library, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie go there, and Pinkie tells Twilight fake explanations so Rainbow Dash can sneak up on her and eat her before she can write a letter to the Princess. Then Rainbow Dash eats Spike.
Just an idea, thought it might be fun to share, once again this is a great story!
I wonder if Seb111114 from youtube would be willing to recreate some of the scenes from this....he's into vore of several types, so it's possible. Though getting all-over fat isn't really his style. Oh, and if you don't recognize the name, here is some of his work: Royal Punishment (Princess Twilight eats Trixie) NightmareMoon Vore (NNM eats the CMC)
I...no.
You lost me with Fluttershy.
Unless you add something about willing victims, I'm gone.
Nice chapter!
4186241
I'm not trolling, and if you try to ignore the problems with this story, you're not doing the author a favor. There's nothing wrong with pointing out errors so the author can improve. There's actually several groups dedicated to this practice, and I used to be a very active member in one of the oldest.
4185646
That said, DA here did get one thing right. Don't stop writing!
I'm sure the fetish fuel was lovely, based on the upvote:downvote ratio on this story. I just don't know if I'll get to it
The way you structured to voice remind me of The Darkness...
The story image alone is enough to warrant a downvote.
I read the the story description to give it a fair chance to redeem itself.
...
Now I wish I had the ability to double downvote.
4187106
Wimp. This wasn't even remotely that bad.
4187106 Ya. Be careful, dude. This is pretty mild compared to some the stuff you can find.
media.heavy.com/media/2013/07/bastard.gif
4185614
^^^
What you said about the author putting too much non-story content in his/her chapters was not trolling. Pointing out what you think are flaws without giving suggestions on how to improve them, like above, is trolling in my book. Your intentions might of been to help the author, but to me, you came across as an elitist jerk. The administrators of this website have stated in the past, that simply listing flaws with a story without offering solutions isn't welcome on this site.
4186140
didn't he already kind of state the gem can effect other people's, sorry "pony's" minds?
i know he did with pinkie pie as it said in either chapter 1 or 2 that pinkie felt something pushing her to help RD with her monstrous desire, who's to say it cant make her prey calmed or even want to be digested?
I would find it strange if not one of these ponies woke up with such stimulus with out something effecting them mentally.
did I just over complicate this?
4205264 Probably, but when I said wiling victims, I was implying that they were willing BEFORE the gem affected their minds.
Oh lawd my fetishes! ALL OF THEM
Now I don't know which of your stories I want to update more...
Update?
This is a good story more pleas
... And there goes my pants
So.bras controlling her black crystals and a dark ominous voice its sombra.
Update?
Wonderful story so far, hope we can read more soon!
not to bad...
I can't believe it's been a year since this first popped up.
P-Wing Blade When will the next chapter come out?
I wonder who Rainbow will eat next? Applejack and Rarity? (no sense keeping them apart from their sisters right), or will somepony find out and Pinkie helps Rainbow trick and eat them? Also, if the other times are any indication, after this feeding Dash is gonna be huge. I do hope this story continues, I don't know if I could handle the loss. This is good, sexy, fun, and dark all at once, I will faithfully wait for this story (though it luckily hasn't been too long). One fun part for me is, the author's note about "the quiet ones" (I love that line), why you ask? I am very quiet, and very twisted (and proud of it). I'd say more of my creepy thoughts related to this story but I don't think anyone really wants to hear 'em. Sorry if I've annoyed anyone, I'm just bored at the moment. To P-Wing Blade (love the name by the way), I love your work, very fun to read, in more ways than one.
Hello again my fellow readers, I was just reading my earlier comment when I realized the perfect character for "somepony finds out but Pinkie somehow helps Rainbow eat them before they can warn anypony", Twilight Sparkle. Like for example, what if Rarity were to visit Fluttershy, gets eaten, then Twilight visits and sees a full Rainbow Dash, knows about the gem enough to guess what happened, teleports to the library, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie go there, and Pinkie tells Twilight fake explanations so Rainbow Dash can sneak up on her and eat her before she can write a letter to the Princess. Then Rainbow Dash eats Spike.
Just an idea, thought it might be fun to share, once again this is a great story!
I wonder if Seb111114 from youtube would be willing to recreate some of the scenes from this....he's into vore of several types, so it's possible. Though getting all-over fat isn't really his style.
Oh, and if you don't recognize the name, here is some of his work:
Royal Punishment (Princess Twilight eats Trixie)
NightmareMoon Vore (NNM eats the CMC)