Guardian of the Everfree
Chapter 10
“What? You’re not being serious. Who the fuck are you!” I demanded of the white horse, apparently named “Faust”, in front of me. The horse looked at me with the same regal look as before.
“Dante, I promise you, I’m telling the truth.” She spoke. Bullshit.
“Alright, tell me something; why would you fucking bring me here? A better question would be, how? I’m apparently resistant to whatever force you fucking unicorns use!” I was curious, but angry at the same time.
My curiosity being my apparent resistance to their mysterious forces; my anger being that if she was telling the truth, the fact that if she did bring me here, that means that this bitch fucking pulled me from my family and friends.
She seemed to realize this. So she attempted to curb both of these at the same time.
“I brought you here, Dante, that is true. You have a right to be angry and I shall attempt to explain why and how.” She stated with confidence, yet somehow retaining her tone. She continued.
“First let me tell you who I am. I am Faust, Creator of Anima and it’s people, regent of the planet.” She stated, quite humbly I might add. She continued.
“I brought you here, Dante, because I need you. There is an evil coming, a dark evil. You are the only on Anima that can destroy it, Even I am rendered helpless against it.”
“So you brought me here to defeat an ancient evil? Sounds like the beginning of ever of shitty story ever.” I snarked. Faust retorted.
“You, Dante, do not wield this power alone. You’re entire species has the ability to destroy it. It consumes magical planets, and Earth is the only planet where magic is void. Thousands of other planets have been consumed by it, but Earth is the only planet that is safe from it. It does not dare go to your planet, in fear of being destroyed by your people.”
“So why me? Why not a spec ops agent? Why just a grunt?” I questioned.
“Aaron, Dante, was my fault. He was the first human I brought, not knowing what would happen. Travelling through the wormhole killed him. I later figured out that this wormhole caused brain trauma to higher brain functions. Sapient life is killed, unless they somehow have a lower brain fuctions at the time. Dante, you were hit by the mortar, your body went into shock and you proceeded to fall into a coma. But your body is not your body.” She stated.
What? Not my body, Aaron’s death was her fault, I’m in a fucking coma!
“What the fuck do you mean! Not my body! What do you fucking mean!” I yelled, than continued. “What do you fucking mean; you’re being too fucking vague!”
“Your real body, Dante, is currently at the Baptist Healthcare Hospital in Louisville, Kentucky. You are on life support in a Persistent Vegetative State. Your sister, due to you giving her POA, is refusing attempts to take you off life support. It currently seems as though you will not recover from the state. I had to craft you a new body, and pulled your soul from your body and placed it in the new body. As your soul is the only part I could effect. I made your new body immune to all magic except mine. Had your normal body come, you would still be immune to all magic.” She stated.
My face paled. I had to ask. “Will I- will I recover? When I leave this world?” She looked at me. A portal formed about twenty feet in front of me. She spoke.
“I will not keep you here, Dante, the choice is yours. But remember, if you leave you will damn an entire planet to death.”
“Can’t you just pull another human over?” I asked.
“I am currently on the fringes of my energy, Dante, if I send you back now I will not recover enough energy to pull someone over to Anima. It will arrive before I regain this energy.”
“You don’t have have limitless energy? Aren’t you supposed to be a God?” This doesn’t make sense.
“I am a sub-set, Dante, your world is ancient. The Creator made your planet as the first intelligent planet. I had to beg The Creator to allow me to bring you over.”
“Wait, The Creator? Who is that?”
“The Creator, Dante, is.” She stated simply.
“God, Allah, who?” I asked.
“The Creator, Dante, is all.”
“So he is God. Alright than.”
“What is your choice, Dante, go back to your family and damn an entire planet? Or save a planet?”
I began to walk to the portal, Faust looked downtrodden. I stopped at about fifteen feet and thought about it again. This is an entire planet, I’m acting like a coward. I’m a fucking Devil dog! I don’t run away from the sound of danger, I run towards it and make it my bitch! I turned around.
“I’ll help you, if you can guarantee me something.” I said. Faust’s ears perked up.
“Anything, Dante, anything to save my minotaurs and my gryphons and my ponies and my zebras and my dragons! Anything to save my children!” She pleaded.
Wow, what a 360. She dropped the regalia, but kept that quirk of saying my name in the first sentence.
“After I do what I need to do, you send me back.”
“Yes, Dante, yes, yes,yes,yes!”
My right eyebrow raised. How did she go from wise ruler to little child? Doesn’t matter.
Faust quickly calmed herself and looked at me with a happy face.
“You will wake up, Dante, now. And to make the ponies warm up to you, you will help a group. I will be able to assist you by acting as a guide, and you will have the needed gear.” She stated.
Wait a minute, needed gear. I quickly managed to put two and two together and everything seemed to fit. “Were you the TARDIS box?”
I managed to speak as my vision began to narrow, and light started filtering in. Right before I passed out, she said something.
“Yes, Dante, yes.”
(-)
I woke up, violently. Quickly pushing myself up, I noticed a few things. My AK was gone, and there were three small equines staring at me. All of them had scared looks on their face. They were atleast fifty feet away in a V formation. Getting a longer look at them, I noticed that they were fillies, that or the equine version of midgets. I’m betting they’re fillies. Wait, are they females? Despite having an equine body structure, these equines were strangely humanoid. Humanoid in the sense that they have human features. Such as the shocked look. Or, atleast, I think it’s a shocked look. Oh god, I hope its not the equine version of bedroom eyes. Some voice popped up in my head.
“Stop thinking like that, Dante, they’re just fillies.” What the fuck? Oh, wait, its just Faust.
The three fillies were still frozen to the spot. They seemed like an odd trio. One was an orange Pegasus with a purple mane and tail. Along with purple eyes, with no stifle mark. The other was a white unicorn with bicolored mane and tail. One side was a medium pink, and the other was medium purple. Surprisingly doesn’t hurt my eyes. Her eyes were an emerald green, yet again missing a stifle mark. Odd, but could just be a coincidence.
The last one was an Earth Familiar equine. She was a… butterscotch yellow? Along with a red mane an tail, Her eyes being a… gold? This one is difficult. She to, had no stifle mark. So it wasn’t a coincidence. And the major thing was that they look so fucking adorable!
Wait a minute. Why am I worrying about three fillies? I need to find my fucking AK. I rose to my feet. Hearing a shriek I turned to the trio of fillies. They were still in a V formation but the butterscotch Earth familiar, who had been leading the trio, was now cowering with her hoof covering her eyes, with the the other two fillies doing the same. How were they bending their legs like that? Fuck, I can’t leave them out in this forest. If the incident with the government head a couple of days ago was any indication, these equines were afraid of this forest.
Remembering how I dealt with scared dogs back in Kentucky, I knelt and held my hand out. I tchked a few times to draw her attention. She looked over at me, and saw my hand. She took a minute to think, while still cowering, she eventually started moving though. Her friends tried to hold her back, but she pushed on. She kept her head down, while her friends were yelling in their strange equine language that sounded like it consisted of snorts, grunts, and whinnies. She slowly closed the distance. Hopefully they were like dogs and would calm down when they had your scent. She was about to nuzzle my hand, but the worst possible thing happened. An oversized grey paw shot from the ground and wrapped itself around her left hind leg.
She looked up at me with a shocked and scared look. I noticed her friends were also grabber from underneath.
Fuck.
A paw from underneath that grabs ponies?
That is obviously a frost giant.
3934056
No, it is obviously a giant radioactive mole.
3934061 I actually think it was one of those goats.
3934076
Goats?
3934083 Iron Will and his goats. They stole the fillies!
3934093
Haha! We must go save them, HS.
An update? What a pleasant surprise to start the day :D
3934061 'twas a diamond dog heat hung reveng on the one called Dante for their fallen alpha- fuck I can't talk like this, it was a diamond dog whatn'd it?
3934465
Mebbeh.
3934470 lel hmmm....... twas something else then?
Probably a turtle grabbed sweetie nom by mistake.
This fic is starting to slip into the slippery slope that is Gary Stu/chosen one rather quickly. Best not let this become a generic story, author, or I will be very disappointed. Dialog is starting to slip up too. No amount of cookies will make up for letting this story go to st.
Please don't fack this up, I'll even offer to help if you want.
Just being honest. Not trying to be mean but, if it keeps you on the right path, I'll be the meanest person ever! I'll even mix up yo socks!
But in al seriousness, I don't like where this is headed. (or at least how we're getting there)
3934817 How the fuck is being asked for help Gary stu? Not everyone loves getting buttfucked by ponies. Just because this guy has realistic attributes instead of being dominated by magical powers doesn't mean he is OP.
3934929 it's not the op factor, it's just the "only you" factor. Most of that rant was a joke btw, I just don't want this to have a boring storyline and think the dialog needs some work. I'm actually looking forward to the asskickings about to be delivered, I just don't want conversations to go so smoothly. They shouldn't breeze through it, there should be slight disagreements and both should try to prove a point or get something. For example, Dante should have tried to strike a deal. An "I save the world and you keep me alive" scenario. It might have not worked because of magic immunity but still, it would have given him a better motive than an "I'll do it because I'm a good guy". Faust could have also used a better strategy than "please help us, we need you" guilt trip. She should have tried to give him an prize or reason to help. Conversations are an exchange of ideas, opinions, thoughts, and other stuff, they're suppose to make the other to change their mind or help you get your way.
The way you wrote it made it feel kinda bland.
I'd try to explain to give you a better explenation but phones were not meant for writing long posts.
Basically, the way they talk bothers me, it doesn't seem realistic, granted, neighter does a talking horse, but talking is one of the most important parts in stories. Know what I mean?
3935055 Ah I see. My bad for jumping to conclusions then. I didn't write this story btw
I would suggest using a flame thrower for the tunnel part when facing the diamond dogs.
3934817
Really? I thought I avoided that with the circumstances. Dante wasn't chosen by fate, he was chosen by circumstances.
3935941 Being chosen at all is super trope in this site, but whatever; as long as you make it work I'm cool with it.
3935941 I suppose that's true. Just make sure to use more descriptive language, paint a picture with words instead of just telling us. For example, instead of writing "he shot at the pony from the bushes." write something along the lines of
"he pressed the stock of his worn out ak to his shoulder, letting himself feel the smooth, worn wood against his skin. Taking a moment to admire his old companion, Dante took note of all the scratches on the metal finish. "I'll have to get that fixed," he thought to himself "I owe you that much."
He poked his head out of the bush, looking for his target. "Gotcha" he whispered after spotting the purple unicorn. "Nighty night, purple."
*BANG*"
Not only will it sound better, but that pesky word count will without a doubt cease to be a problem. It will take more time though.
whelp this is going to be good especially with the language barrier and it would be hard for a d-dog to get the AK but if thay did then it would not mater but a pony unicorn then you are probably safe till thay can shoot straight. (the new dag will bark if thay tried but the filly's didn't get the bark.)
This story have a interesting plot unique on this website on the topic of human soldier in Equestria.
3935509 That actually would be a bad idea, since the flames would suck all the oxygen from the tunnel air and suffocate everyone/everypony/everything within a good distance underground.
3951600
Well, I imagine the DDs would be smart enough to dig extremely efficient air tunnels.
But, Dante is trying to save the fillies, not barbecue them.
3951600
Oxygen tanks.
3951864 Okay, how heavy are oxygen tanks? Do ponies even have access to oxygen tanks at all for their size (remember, the CMC did not have oxygen tanks when they were snorkeling and trying to get their cutie marks). and possible body type? Even the backlash from the flames would be harmful to them unless one put up a magical shield.
3951905
The TARDIS box. . .
3951919
Aah, the Deus Ex Machina plot device saves the day again.
3951919 Umm...
t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSO-ZeJ13SUlpswnnaX8hwqwtiujw5i0OYfl55bvVh7W0mLC3tP2g
3951934
Ha!
3951948
troll.me/images/scumbag-obama/why-yes-i-am.jpg
Blame Obama
3951951
Eventually, one of these days, Dante is going to pull a hydrogen bomb from that bitch and scream "FUCK IT ALL!"
3951966
KA-BOOM
i1.ytimg.com/vi/P6ho3jU4bzM/maxresdefault.jpg
3952016
He needs to pull an armored truck out of there.
3952053
No, A Mech.
wakpaper.com/large/Triumph_wallpapers_202.jpg
3952072
Problem is, he isn't trained to operate one.
3952132
It's easy, just use the w,a,d,s, keys and mouse.
If Not. . .
THEN FUCK IT! JUST PULL AN ENTIRE BLOODY ARMY OUT!
i1.ytimg.com/vi/P6ho3jU4bzM/maxresdefault.jpg
3952053
Or a Phaser.
Just imagine it.........For those of you who are unfamiliar with Star Trek tech here you go.
Wait a minute, needed gear. I quickly managed to put two and two together and everything seemed to fit. “Were you the TARDIS box?”
I managed to speak as my vision began to narrow, and light started filtering in. Right before I passed out, she said something.
“Yes, Dante, yes.”
"Can I get some Power Armour?"
"No, Dante, no."
3960787
HERESY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3960978 does that mean power armor is in his future?
3960985
No.
I mean think about it. He already has something better than power armour on his side.
He has a god.
3961025 meh argueable. she's been weakened. Power armor is hardened steel and synthetic muscle ready to snap things in half and heft big guns.
Also carrying around an m134 is a bitch. The ammo only adds more bitch onto that bitch to make a big ol lez orgy. But while enjoyable it is still heavy as hell.
either way I like where this is going
3961034
She is still the most powerful creature on the planet.
3961216
Glad to hear you like it. Can I ask your favorite part?
3961328
Well, glad to hear it. New chapter should be uploaded soon. So just stick around please.
fav'ed /// I haven't read it yeah but the story just sounds like amazing concept...
p.s. will tell what I think when done reading ch 1 :)
3982747
Oh, shit. I always thought it meant "on the move."
Good story idea, I like it.
Few things to look out for.
Make your chapters longer. I wince after I finish a chapter, since it was barely enough to keep me entertained.
Read over your chapters very carefully. I have spotted a few mistakes in every chapter. There shouldn't be any mistakes like missing words, misplaced letters, misspelled words, etc.
Other than that, I like this story. Very interesting. I will favourite this to track it.
Went from iPad to laptop, and the errors grew in number. Mostly spelling thankfully.
I am betting its a dead thing reincarnate.