Iron Hearts: Book 2 - Ferrous Dominus

by SFaccountant

Business Sense

Iron Hearts: Book 2

Chapter 6

Business Sense

****

Ferrous Dominus - gates

"I cannot tell you enough how glad I am to be getting back to pony civilization. I have been away from my work - and my kitchen - for far too long," Rarity said as she approached the line of idling Rhinos.

Twilight and her friends were gathering in front of the gates as the servitors lugged Rarity's luggage pile to the lots. Only Applejack was absent.

"Oh, come on Rarity. How many ponies can say they've been through what we have while were here?" Rainbow Dash asked, hovering above the group. "Think of all the awesome things we got to see!"

Rarity looked annoyed. "True. I suppose I'll carry the memories of skulking through a smoldering fortress being shot at by robots and space men forever. Unfortunately."

"I think you're carrying more than just memories out of here," Twilight mumbled, her eyes fixed on Rarity's luggage. Among the suitcases and duffle bags was a single munitions case colored gunmetal and banded with warning stripes.

"So which vehicle are we going in?" Fluttershy asked, staring pensively at the Rhinos and Chimeras lined up in front of them. Iron Warriors and security men were milling about in front of them, occasionally giving the group of ponies and baggage lingering glances. They had been around long enough that much of the Company had at least heard that there was a collection of ponies who had been allowed into Ferrous Dominus, but they were still enough of an oddity to warrant attention wherever they went.

"I'm not sure yet," Twilight admitted, "Gaela's supposed to meet us here. She'll know."

"The Acolyte is running late," barked a voice heavily distorted by a vox grille behind them, "I'll lead you to our transport."

The ponies turned to regard the Iron Warrior speaking to them, and Pinkie immediately lit up.

"Desty! It's you!" the pink earth pony cheered, galloping up to the rhino driver in a flash.

Dest raised an arm almost lazily as Pinkie erupted into the air, and intercepted the leaping pony to prevent her from clinging to his helmet. Pinkie didn't seem troubled by this defense, and simply grabbed onto his arm instead as she grinned.

"Oh, uh, hello... Dest?" Twilight said uncertainly.

She really had no idea how Pinkie had identified the Iron Warrior so quickly. Unlike Serith and Tellis, Dest's voice and armor seemed almost exactly like that of the other Chaos Space Marines that had the same job; she would have found it almost impossible to pick out the driver among a group of the other vehicle pilots grouped at the edge of the lot.

"Hello, xenos. It seems I drew the short straw again," muttered the Iron Warrior as Pinkie clambered up onto his shoulder.

"Hooray! I thought we wouldn't get to see you again!" the party pony said.

"I'm not unsatisfied with the arrangement," Dest allowed in what was easily the closest he'd ever come to a statement of affection. "Follow me. My other Rhino was destroyed during the xeno assault, but I've been assigned a new one."

"So this is your third vehicle?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"On this world, yes," Dest mumbled as he started walking toward the lots, "my luck at surviving wrecks is matched only by the misfortune of the transports I pilot, it would seem."

The Chaos Space Marine pointed to one of the transports parked in the lots. "There it is. Have the servitors begin loading your things."

"Thank you, Mister Dest," Rarity said as she trotted past him and happily began directing and assisting the cybernetic servants.

"You said Gaela is running late?" Twilight asked as the servitors lumbered past.

"Yes. I am not privy to the details, but I can only assume there was some conflict with her previously assigned duties and her unexpected reassignment to Master Delgan's team," the Iron Warrior surmised, "right now the Dark Mechanicus units are very valuable. Several officers have been bartering with them to have certain repairs done faster, so I'm sure the Dark Magi were reluctant to let her go."

Twilight nodded in understanding. "Well, that's fine. Applejack's running behind too, so we're not just waiting on her."

"Oh? Do you need someone to fetch your companion?" Dest asked.

"No, she'll be along. She just wanted to say goodbye."

****

Ferrous Dominus - sector 6 barracks unit delta

"There he is. Lower bunk on the fifth row, by the window."

Applejack nodded as she spotted the familiar head of hair. "Ah see him. Thank ya kindly, sugarcube."

After dismissing the mercenary that had led her up to this area, Applejack trotted over to Daniels' bunk.

"Rise 'n shine cowboy. Ah got a thing'r two to say to ya," the farmpony said, knocking a hoof against the leg of the bed.

Daniels didn't respond at all, and was still facing away from her as he slumbered.

Applejack's expression became annoyed. "Yo! Git up already! Ah know ya can hear me!"

Daniels shifted slightly in response, rolling onto his back as one arm slowly reached out toward the orange pony.

Applejack wasn't sure what he was doing at first as his hand reached for her head, and she was none too impressed when he grabbed the rim of her hat and pulled it down over her eyes.

"Sleeping now. Late watch shift," mumbled the man as his arm went slack.

Applejack pushed her hat back into place, and then stood up next to the bunk, placing her forelegs on top of the resting man. "Look, either you get up now and talk fer a minute, or Ah give yer boys here an example on how the Apple family harvests trees and wakes up lazy farmhands."

The other soldiers seemed quite interested in this, but ultimately they were disappointed as Daniels groaned and turned over some more so that he was at least facing the pony as his head rested on the pillow.

"What're you here for, AJ?" Daniels murmured, his eyes squinting against the dim lights of the barracks. "We've been running long and heavy guard shifts due to the attack. I'm not getting much sleep today."

"It'll just take a minute," the orange pony insisted, "sit up, would ya? Ah don't want ya nodding off 'fore Ah'm done."

It took way too long for Daniels to do so, but eventually the mercenary was sitting on his bunk in his shorts and tank top, scrubbing his hair with his hand.

"Thanks. Ah just wanted to say goodbye to ya," Applejack said, smiling a bit somberly, "me and the others're headin' back home today."

Daniels blinked rapidly. "Oh? Where are they?"

Applejack shrugged. "They're already at the gates. Even though somepony fixed up yer train, they didn't wanna take another trip out when Ah told 'em where Ah was goin'. They all said that we'd run into ya again later anyway."

Daniels nodded. "Seems likely. If we run any more units through Ponyville they'll probably put me in one of them. And you might be back, I suppose."

"Yeah, well, just in case Ah wanted to see ya before Ah left. Ah might be awful busy when Ah get back, and so might you." Then she wet her lips and leaned in her head to speak to him at a much lower volume. "Also, they don't exactly take good care of ya over here. If... Ah mean, if ya..."

She trailed off nervously, and Daniels chuckled lightly.

"If I kick the bucket after you leave, you at least wanted to say goodbye first. Thanks," he smirked and placed a hand on Applejack's hat, shifting it back and forth in an awkward attempt to pet her, "you're a good kid, AJ. It's kind of a shame you had to make friends with creeps like us."

"Oh, don't you patronize me!" Applejack snapped, though she didn't really seem angry. Nor did she make any attempt to stop him from rubbing her head. "Somepony's gotta look out fer ya. You'd already be fertilizer if Ah weren't around."

"True enough. Goodbye, AJ. It's been fun," Daniels said somberly, letting his hand drop.

"G'bye Daniels. Keep yer head down," Applejack said sadly as she turned back around, trotting toward the exit.

Daniels sighed as the doors shut behind the blonde earth pony, rubbing his face with his hands.

"Sooooo..." began the man laying on the bunk above, leaning his head over the edge of the mattress. "... Was she, like, your girlfriend, or...?"

"Oh, you can go straight to Hell," Daniels snapped, dropping back to his bunk and closing his eyes again.

He heard the door to the hall slide open again, and the mercenary craned his head to see if Applejack had come back to say something else.

When he saw a Dark Techpriest enter instead, he closed his eyes again. During waking hours he would very much like to know why a Techpriest would be wandering about in the barracks for human foot soldiers, but he was currently too tired to indulge his curiosity.

"Rifleman Wyatt Daniels. Your attention, please."

A hefty groan came from Daniels as he cracked his eyes open again. "Blast, I'm popular all of a sudden. I don't suppose there's a beautiful HUMAN woman among everyone lined up to keep me from sleeping?"

The Dark Techpriest tilted its head to the side. "I am female, as a matter of fact, but I am unsure as to the relevance of this."

Daniels slowly pulled himself upright, turning his gaze toward the Techpriest. He honestly couldn't tell by looking if it (presumably she) was telling the truth.

"Well, I suppose it's best that you didn't wait for me to fall asleep again. What can I do for you, Techpriest?" Daniels asked.

"I require your attention for only a few moments, Wyatt Daniels," the Techpriest said, not bothering to introduce herself, "I have an item for you from Dark Magos Kaelith."

Daniels promptly became far more alert. "Say what, now?"

She had a long, thin rifle case hanging from her back-mounted servo arm, and the Dark Techpriest swung it around to present the item to the mercenary. "I have an item for you from Dark Magos Kaelith," she repeated, unable to understand the man's confusion from such a simple statement.

Daniels hesitantly reached out to take the case, and then laid it over his lap.

"What is it?" he asked, staring at the gene-lock built into the side.

"It is a Tau rail rifle and pulse pistol," the Techpriest said simply, revealing a smaller attaché case being held by her bionic tri-clawed arm, "this is an extra ammunition supply. Although we have significant stocks of Tau munitions available to us in the fleet, be advised that these stores are not readily available in Company armories, nor will you be able to scavenge such ammunition from fallen allies. It is advised that you practice discretion when using your new weapons to conserve ammunition in the field."

Daniels stared down at the case, then up at the Dark Techpriest. "Okay, let's back up a tad. Why is the Dark Magos giving me presents?"

"These are not gifts," the Techpriest replied coldly, sounding slightly offended by the notion, "I was informed that I may have to explain the disbursement of these items at length, so I have prepared an explanation."

"I'm all ears," Daniels said, utterly overwhelmed.

"The Dark Mechanicus deals in many forms of currency, Wyatt Daniels. Materials and data are common, but even more so, the Mechanicus deals in favors."

"I'm following you," Daniels mumbled.

"You performed a favor of considerable value to the Dark Magos: you protected one of the fusion cores from damage by the xeno intruder," the cyborg cultist explained, "in order to repay this debt, Dark Magos Kaelith modified the intruder's weapons such that anyone can fire them without issue. He has now given them back to you, and considers his obligation negated."

Daniels felt fairly numb as he passed a hand over the gene-lock. A light promptly lit green, and the case split open along a horizontal seam.

Inside was the Fireblade's rail rifle and sidearm, exactly as the Techpriest had said, along with several ammunition packs for both. The casings had been replaced such that it was shielded with durasteel over an adamantium frame, and the rifle included a bayonet attachment that one would never find on a Tau weapon. They also bore the Legion colors of gunmetal with gold trim rather than their old heraldry of blue and black.

"I guess my main question is why I'm being rewarded so well for just doing my job," he asked, "I mean, I was just hoping for a nice bonus to this month's pay at BEST."

"The Dark Magos considered your actions to go beyond the usual demands of your function and determined that he stood indebted to you," the Techpriest said, although she was starting to sound slightly tired of the conversation, "and he thought it fitting to repay your efforts with the weapons that you yourself secured. Is this unsatisfactory?"

"Nope. Most satisfactory," Daniels said as he shut the case, "I'll need to put in some extra target range practice to get used to new weapons, but I'm right pleased, Techpriest."

"Excellent. Then our business is concluded," she said, turning away from the man and heading back toward the doors.

Daniels stared down at the case briefly, then looked up again. "Actually, Techpriest?"

She halted.

"You have a cutting torch handy?"

She turned and nodded wordlessly.

"In that case, I was wondering if you could make a TINY modification for me..."

****

Ferrous Dominus - gates

Applejack hummed to herself as she approached the gates, her saddlebags clinking noisily from the bottles stuffed within.

She spotted her friends quickly, finding it as easy as anyone else to spot the cavalcade of brightly colored ponies among the industrial grays of the fortress.

"Ah, finally. At least we only have to wait on Miss Gaela now," Rarity said as Applejack trotted up to them. She was laying by the side of the rhino, which was almost smothered by her luggage.

Twilight beckoned over to the side of the lots. "Give your badge to that man in white before we leave."

"Roger!" Applejack said brightly, trotting off in that direction.

"Well, she seems chipper," Rarity noted.

"I'm sure she's happy to head home again after it was wrecked," Fluttershy said with a pleased smile.

"Not to mention that this whole mission to save Equestria from the evil human army ended pretty well for all of us," Rainbow Dash pointed out, "the humans leave on their own, Equestria's saved, and we even get to hang out with them until they go."

"True. That... That could have gone much worse," Twilight admitted, chewing her lip.

Applejack returned from the security station, taking off her saddlebags. "Yo, where can Ah stash this?"

"Anywhere inside," Twilight said, beckoning to the open rear access ramp of the transport.

When Applejack carried them in, however, she heard the distinctive sound of glass containers bouncing against each other.

"Wait, Applejack, what do you have in there?" Twilight asked in alarm. Rarity and Rainbow Dash also looked quite intrigued.

"They call it amasec," Applejack said, wedging the saddlebags next to a tool box and hoping the vehicle wouldn't shake too much.

After she was satisfied that it was secure, she walked back out. "Ah brought some cider with me when Ah came here and plenty o' bits. After tryin' some of the human moonshine fer mahself I figured Ah'd bring some back and see how it'd sell. So Ah traded fer it."

"Can I try some?" Rainbow Dash asked excitedly.

"Sure. Fer forty bits a bottle," Applejack said flatly, smirking as Rainbow blinked in shock.

"FORTY? There are magic potions that sell for less than that!" Rainbow Dash complained.

"Supply and demand, sugarcube. Ah only got four of 'em," the farmpony said smugly, leaning against the Rhino, "that was my 'dear friend discount' price, too. This'd run sixty bits fer most ponies."

"I see the magic of friendship is trading at a premium of twenty bits nowadays," Rarity said with an amused smirk, "ever the businessmare."

A slow and deliberate clapping sound came from behind the ponies, eventually distracting them from their conversation.

"Well played, Miss. It gladdens me to see the soul of a merchant exists within your people."

Only one of the ponies knew the man who was approaching them, and Twilight had only met him briefly. The mustachioed human bowed.

"I have not met most of you, I believe. I am Norris Delgan, Trademaster of the 38th Company. I will be accompanying you and Acolyte Gaela to your settlement."

He wasn't wearing his rebreather at the moment, and was also dressed in a fine officer's uniform with the medals and ribbons normally pinned to the breast replaced by a single golden Chaos star that somehow managed to seem refined in the ensemble. Even his facial reconstruction was smooth and carefully resembled the shape of the flesh it replaced, in stark contrast to the bulky and mechanically optimized augments of the Mechanicus and Iron Warriors. He was the first human any of them had met that wasn't dressed like he was prepared for a firefight, and Rarity found herself instantly interested, if not still cautious.

Rainbow Dash and Applejack introduced themselves, receiving polite nods from the man. Fluttershy had already retreated into the Rhino to hide from him and Twilight had already met him, so soon Rarity found the Trademaster's calculating gaze on her.

"I am Rarity, Mister Delgan. May I ask why you're coming with us?" the white unicorn mused, an eyebrow raised. "I'd heard that the 38th Company was planning to negotiate with Equestria, but given its military nature I would have expected a general or professional diplomat, not a merchant."

Delgan stood silently for a few seconds, and then chuckled happily in response to the question. "Miss Sparkle, you never mentioned that one of your friends possessed such extraordinary wit and political acumen." He straightened before he answered the unicorn's question. "I am acting as liaison to your people because it occurred to me alone that such an arrangement might be beneficial. Sadly, my Astartes masters could hardly care less. It was quite generous of them even to spare the Dark Acolyte Gaela for my purposes, considering the current need for repairs about Ferrous Dominus."

"And what kind of benefit do you hope to find in Equestria, Mister Delgan?" Rarity pressed, plenty suspicious of the human's motives.

Delgan continued smiling as he circled the unicorn, observing her with an intensity that had Spike clenching his teeth angrily. "Commercial benefits, Miss Rarity. The Iron Warriors, with a few exceptions, see other life forms as either assets to be expended or targets to be destroyed. The Dark Mechanicus dismissed your entire civilization as worthless at a glance based on your technology level and your dependence on psykers."

He stepped past the ponies, and then he looked up at Rarity's luggage as he rubbed at his chin. "Those segments of the 38th Company, while indispensable and extremely capable in their own right, suffer from... let's call it 'limited vision'. They see the entire galaxy as a series of objectives or build orders to be completed. Their work is their life, so they have little concept of matters like comfort, diversion, or culture. But these things DO matter. As much as the Iron Warriors would insist otherwise, you cannot run a settlement, or even a reasonably large base such as this, on nothing but metal, bullets, and nutrient paste. I can see the value in the more abstract products of a species. Art. Food. Language. Influence."

Twilight saw that Rainbow Dash and Applejack weren't even paying attention to the man anymore as he spoke, and seemed to be involved in a quiet argument about Applejack's amasec.

Rarity, on the other hand, looked like she was trying to hold back tears of joy.

"Thank you, Mister Delgan! I had very nearly given up on your species entirely!" Rarity said, pressing a hoof against her chest. "Ever since I arrived I've seen nothing but gun-toting brutes wearing rags and metal tromping about in this industrial blight and chugging filth that could strip the paint off walls!" Her expression turned somewhat bitter. "Half the time I attempt to talk to them, it's 'be silent, xeno,' and the other half it's 'away with you, witch'! You cannot even imagine what a relief it is to finally meet a human with a sense of tact and class!"

Delgan grimaced. "It must have been unbearable, truly. To say nothing of the GROSS inconvenience of the Tau assault."

Twilight quirked an eyebrow. "'Gross inconvenience'? Didn't a lot of people die?"

"Ugh, I don't even want to think about the Tau," Rarity said irritably, dismissing Twilight's question. "Just LOOK at what those pests did to my tail!"

Delgan tilted his head as he focused attention on the short length of shining purple that curved down behind the unicorn's rear and then curled upward at the tip.

"It looks immaculate," he said simply, "whatever did they do to it?"

"It was immaculate with twice again the length before those thugs burned it off!" Rarity scowled.

"Scoundrels," Delgan spat, shaking his head. Then he spotted a patch of black moving among the transport maintenance crews. "Ah, you'll have to excuse me. It seems our Acolyte has arrived, and I require a word with her."

He bowed and then turned away, leaving the ponies on their own once more.

"My, what an utter snake of a man," Rarity said with a chuckle as soon as Delgan was out of earshot.

Twilight and Spike looked startled.

"What? You seemed like you were really getting along with him," Twilight said.

"Well, of course I was. I wasn't lying when I said I was happy to meet a human with style and etiquette. But Mister Delgan was trying far too hard to ingratiate himself. And really, pretending like he cared about my tail when he probably had friends and associates who were killed in the attack was just transparent. Who would do something like that?"

Twilight's mind boggled. "So you dislike him?"

Rarity couldn't suppress a laugh. "Are you joking? Twilight, darling, after coming here and being faced with armored giants, indifferent soldiers, deadly Sorcerers, and gigantic metal monstrosities, getting to deal with a smarmy, manipulative stuffed shirt is an absolute treat. I barely restrained myself from hugging him."

"Come on, AJ! Twenty bits! If it's good I'll pay the other twenty, okay?" Rainbow Dash complained loudly enough to draw the two horned ponies away from their previous topic.

"What kinda business ya think Ah'm runnin' Dash? Moonshine don't come with a performance guarantee!" Applejack snapped, standing in front of her saddlebags like a guard.

Rarity snickered. "You know, as TRADEMASTER, I'm sure Mister Delgan has plenty of whatever swill you're trying to get your hooves on, darling."

Rainbow Dash brightened immediately, although Applejack looked annoyed by the prospect.

"Gaela's coming!" Twilight said excitedly as she spotted the black-robed figure walking toward them with Delgan.

The Dark Acolyte didn't offer any greetings as she got within earshot, and immediately started disbursing whatever information she felt was immediately relevant.

"We're going to be taking a medicae transport with us, and we'll be stopping at the Apples' farm," she declared, "this will extend the travel time somewhat."

Applejack blinked. "What? Aw, that's okay. You can let everypony off in Ponyville instead if it would be faster."

"No, we cannot," Gaela responded flatly, "immediately previous to the Tau attack the Mechanicus transports that were assigned to set up your agri-facility were shot down near your farm. There were a few surviving Scavurel that require support."

Applejack gasped. "The Tau got 'em before they could build mah house?"

"No, they were shot down on the way back. Your facilities were completed on schedule immediately prior to enemy contact."

The farmpony blinked as she worked out when they had finished. "Oh. Wow, y'all work fast, doncha?"

"We do," Gaela agreed as her helmet broke open and shifted into its disengaged position, "so we'll set up there first."

Delgan bowed. "I will be taking a different transport directly to your village, so we must part for a short while."

"Hold on!" Rainbow Dash commanded, causing the man to pause. "Do you have any... what was it called? Amasec?"

Delgan's demeanor changed instantly, and he stood up straighter as he placed his palms together. "I have a great deal, as a matter of fact. Someone has to keep real liquor around to compete with that filth brewed by the soldiery."

The blue pegasus smiled hopefully. "Can I have some?"

"If I can have fifty of your 'bits'." Delgan replied with a smirk.

As Applejack snickered, Rainbow staggered and dropped onto the ground, as if the price had struck her from the air. "But that's even more than what Applejack wanted!"

"Actually, from what I hear I'm under-cutting her price by one-sixth," the trader said as he inspected his fingernails, "but you won't be getting any discounts from me, lass."

Rainbow Dash moped as the Trademaster walked off toward his own convoy.

"Whether in service to the Imperium, the darker powers, or any of the factions that count themselves as 'free', capitalism is always the same," Gaela noted absently.

Then she glanced about, frowning. "We seem to be missing Pie. Will she be along, or shall I engage in that asinine running gag to summon her?"

"Oh, she's here," Twilight insisted, pointing toward the rhino, "she's with Mister Dest."

****

Rhino cab

"This button controls the smoke launchers. It deploys an obscuring screen to foil incoming attacks, although the protection is marginal at best."

Pinkie grinned as she stood with her front legs on the control board of the Rhino and her rear legs on the bench that served as the crew seat.

"This is the navigator. It draws on local scans and recon data to generate a picture of the region and locate objectives and obstacles. How useful it is varies widely from mission to mission."

Pinkie pointed to a large button in-between the two tread control levers that were Dest's primary interface to drive the transport. "Is that the horn? Can I honk the horn?!"

"You may NOT honk the horn," Dest said sharply, "the horn is for my use only."

Pinkie's happy expression turned to a simpering pout instantly, and she stared pitifully at the Chaos Space Marine.

"Your attempt to influence my decisions with sudden and dramatic emotional shifts will fail," Dest stated flatly, his crimson visor glimmering in the dim light.

Pinkie's lip started quivering.

"... You may not honk the horn. But you MAY man the combi-bolter," Dest allowed.

"Woo-hoo!" Pinkie cheered. She promptly climbed up the ladder rails behind her toward the top hatch.

"Lord Dest?" called Gaela from within the transport hold. "We are ready to depart."

Dest watched the indicator lights for the rear access ramp turn off as the locks engaged. "Heading out, then. Pie, don't fire the gun while we're still in the base."

"Not even at the servitors?" the earth pony asked, already seated behind the combi-bolter and swiveling about for targets.

"Not even at the servitors. You can shoot at whatever you want once we leave the security cordon."

"Hooray!"

****

Ponyville

"Hey, Bloom!" "Wait up!"

Apple Bloom glanced behind her as Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle raced from the schoolhouse to catch up.

"Oh, hey. Y'all comin' over today too?" Apple Bloom asked happily, trotting across the schoolyard.

"Of course we're coming over! Everything exciting has been happening at your farm nowadays!" Scootaloo said brightly.

"Oh, I don't know about that. There are still bunkers next to Fluttershy's cottage, even after the humans left," Sweetie Belle pointed out.

"Hey blank flanks!" shouted a voice from behind them, immediately banishing their good mood as two other fillies trotted up behind them.

"Where are you three off to in such a hurry? Back to your nutty space shack?"

Apple Bloom glared behind her at Diamond Tiara as the pale pink filly trotted up to them. Silver Spoon followed behind, as usual, and held the same haughty expression as the pair of fillies giggled.

"My mother actually stopped by there yesterday," Silver Spoon said suddenly, raising a hoof to her mouth as if to stifle giggles, "she said the whole place looks more like an amusement park than a farm! If you showed off the humans with metal limbs, you'd have a full circus, complete with freak show!"

As Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon laughed, Apple Bloom rolled her eyes.

"Look here, now. Normally Ah'd stick around and take yer sass, but Ah don't have time fer that today. Mah brother needs me to come home and help out since Applejack is still away."

"Didn't Lenna say she would help out, though?" Scootaloo asked.

"Sure, but what's she gonna do? She don't have any legs!" Apple Bloom countered.

The amused expression on Diamond Tiara's face wilted slightly as the three markless fillies began talking amongst themselves again. "Even without legs, she has to be more help than YOU," the pink filly surmised, pointing to Apple Bloom.

The red-headed pony turned her head away. "Fer yer information, Diamond, Ah get plenty done with Crabapple's help."

"Who's Crabapple? Did your family have to start hiring part-timers because you were too useless?" Diamond Tiara asked.

"That's her, over there!" Apple Bloom said, breaking into a gallop and sprinting down the road.

Crabapple wasn't exactly hidden by the shade of the tree that the automata was standing under, but the two unfamiliar fillies didn't really notice the painted-up machine until Apple Bloom raced toward it, and then they stopped short in surprise.

+Command unit Apple Bloom has been secured. Perimeter has been scanned. Commencing retrieval mission.+

Diamond and Silver glanced at each other.

"It looks like a trash can on legs," the latter noted.

"Yeah, she kinda does, but she's nice," Apple Bloom said happily, nuzzling one of Crabapple's armor plates. Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo started climbing up the main body so that they could ride the probe home.

"What IS that thing?" Diamond Tiara asked, taking a cautious step back.

"It's an intelligent machine the humans made," Sweetie Belle said smugly, quite pleased to be able to talk down to the pair of privileged ponies, "one of the Scavurel said they're dropped onto planets from space so that they can scout the surface for the human space ships!"

The two marked fillies shared another glance, feeling increasingly out of their element.

"And why do YOU have one?" Silver Spoon demanded of Apple Bloom.

The young farmer snorted. "It's a long story, and like Ah told ya, Ah don't have a lotta time. But in a nutshell, the Warp did it." She started walking down the road, and Crabapple moved into step behind her, matching its commander's pace.

Apple Bloom's explanation was utterly unhelpful to the two confused ponies, although Diamond Tiara was quick to shake off her surprise and curiosity.

"Yeah, real impressive, taking some human garbage that they probably dumped in your yard by accident."

Apple Bloom remained silent. Partly because she really did want to get home as soon as possible, and in part because that guess was basically what had actually happened.

"Whatever. I could get one of those walking tin heaps if I wanted one," Diamond Tiara said, running a hoof back to brush through her hair.

She was quite annoyed when the three unmarked fillies promptly burst into laughter.

"Pft! Yeah, good luck with that," Scootaloo snorted.

"I think you'll have to get along a little better with the 'freaks' before that'll happen," Sweetie Belle pointed out with a smirk.

Apple Bloom didn't bother rebuking the two fillies, and started galloping faster. "C'mon Crabapple, giddyup! Big Brother's waitin'!"

Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon watched them go with matching glares of annoyance. Neither filly had a good response though, so they simply waited until their classmates were out of earshot.

Then Diamond turned toward Silver. "Your mother went to Sweet Apple Acres again this week? Isn't that the third time?"

Silver Spoon winced. "She's there a lot. Even though we still have plenty of apples. I think she might have a crush on Apple Bloom's brother." Her ears fell flat against her head. "Things have been a little uncomfortable at home."

Diamond grimaced. "Well, come stay at my place tonight. You can help me bug my daddy to buy me a space robot!"

"Okay!" Silver Spoon said, perking up instantly.

****

Sweet Apple Acres

A loud thumping noise came from the orchard as one of the apple trees shook violently, its branches trembling before the apples broke free and tumble to the ground.

Big Macintosh turned around as the apples bounced around his hooves, reaching his head down to grab those that hadn't landed in his buckets already.

"That has to be the most absurd method of fruit harvest ever contemplated."

Positioned under a different tree was a large harvest wagon, and sitting inside it was Lenna, the Dark Mechanicus pilot.

Long, prehensile metal tendrils slithered up out of her shoulders, and these curious extremities darted into the trees before cutting away at apple stems or wrapping around branches to free the fruit strung out along them. The apples would then be dropped directly into the bucket Lenna was carrying in her more ordinary arms.

"I'm serious. The damage to the flora from such a crude method of harvest draws energy away from the process of generating fruit in order to repair the tissue damage. The amount of force you're using to dislodge the foodstuffs is immense, and all these trees display obvious signs of accumulated abuse on their exterior layers."

"Eeyup," Big Mac agreed, putting the last apple in his bucket and then carrying the full buckets over to the wagon.

Lenna's tendrils filled up a bucket of her own, and she placed it at the far corner where her own apple piles lay.

"In addition," the pilot continued as the red stallion brought his buckets over and put them in one by one, "your method sometimes leaves a few apples remaining on the branches. Putting aside the accumulated wastage, those abandoned apples may end up sprouting new trees for your grove if left alone, and pass along the genetic variations that lead to stronger stems. Ultimately, this will select for those traits that will make your job more difficult."

Big Mac paused and glanced up at the boughs of the apple tree, spotting one of the deep red morsels almost hidden behind the leaves.

"Eeyup," he agreed, and then placed his last loaded bucket into the wagon.

"So you concede that your method of harvest is ineffective?" Lenna asked, planting her hands on her recently fixed life-support pod.

"Eenope."

Lenna leaned over forward, the blank gunmetal visor that was grafted over her eyes almost touching Big Mac's snout. "Why not?"

"'Cuz Ah've finished three trees fer every one o' yours," Big Mac said simply before he started walking to the next tree.

Lenna straightened out and said nothing for several seconds as she studied her apple pile as compared to Mac's.

"It's more like two-point-eight-three trees for every one of mine," the pilot corrected grudgingly.

"Ah'm in no hurry," Mac said in explanation as he arranged the next set of buckets.

Before he could kick the next tree, Lenna felt a sensor ping and checked her instruments.

"We have vehicles incoming. Point seven kilometers from present position," she said grimly, swiveling about in her pod to face the intercept.

Big Macintosh snapped his head up, staring in the same direction she was.

"IFF signatures detected... they're friendlies," Lenna said, her voice curiously unchanged.

Big Mac relaxed. Slightly.

"I'll need to get closer to establish a vox link," Lenna advised, glancing over to the stallion, "shall we?"

"Eeyup," Macintosh said as he tossed the emptied apple buckets into the wagon.

After their tools had been loaded up, Big Macintosh hitched himself to the front of the wagon and then started moving them through the orchard.

Lenna placed her hands to her temples as she worked out the data scraps she could pick out of the distant units. As a pilot, she was used to doing such things with the considerably more powerful instruments of a Mechanicus vehicle, but even ripped from her cockpit she still had the tools to assemble a wide-scale picture of a potential battlefield.

"There are several units. Too large a group to be a scout mission. Not enough to be a strike force. And if it were an infiltration task force I wouldn't have picked it up."

Big Mac glanced backward as he carried the cybernetic woman along, his eyes looking mildly concerned.

"I believe that this is our transport group to take us home," Lenna reassured him, "but that can't be all. There are too many vehicles."

Big Macintosh could hear them now, the deep rumble of the transport engines reaching out into the orchard.

"Almost... there! Got a link!" The network antennae attached to her back quivered as it shifted upward.

"This is unit 90017-871 requesting identification of incoming convoy."

"This is dispatch alpha seven responding to your useless string of numbers," crackled a voice from her vox unit, "good to hear you tin men are alive and vigilant. No, Pie, pull down the top lever before you attach the new clip. Yes, like that."

Big Mac stopped to listen in to the new voice, and Lenna shrugged.

"Anyway, we have a ride to take you back to civilization. Try not to get this one blown up along the way."

"Confirmed, alpha seven. Make your way to the agri-complex. I will inform my squad Core that you have arrived."

Big Macintosh started moving again, heading for the farmstead.

Lenna cut the vox link, and then crossed her arms over her chest. "Well, it's about time. Ferrous Dominus should have received our distress beacon days ago. A little longer and we'll be out of your hands. Ah, I mean, hooves."

"Eeyup." Big Macintosh carried the wagon along for almost another full minute, listening to the rumble of heavy vehicle engines get closer. Then he turned his head to the side.

"Thanks fer helpin' out. Ya didn't need to do this."

The Mechanicus pilot tilted her head to the side, perplexed. "Helping out? You saved our lives. Aid to the Dark Mechanicus is not so easily forgotten."

She reached down and picked up an apple. She didn't like the look of it one bit - it was far inferior to nutrient paste - but it was clearly the primary foodstuff of this agri-facility, and the livelihood of its owners.

"Helping you harvest these 'apples' is simply a productive way to pass the time. I do not even consider it repayment for your assistance."

"Well, Ah do," Big Macintosh said simply as the farmhouse/bunker complex came into view.

Whatever Lenna was about to say in response was interrupted by the bark of a combi-bolter firing, and Lenna immediately threw herself to the side, tilting her pod over far enough that she fell sidelong into the bed of apples behind her.

Big Mac flinched and ducked his head as small explosions started ripping through an apple tree several meters away, but there wasn't much else he could do while hitched to the cart.

"Dispatch alpha seven!" Lenna barked as she re-established the vox link. "Why have you opened fire? I'm reading zero enemy contacts!"

Rather than hearing the vox-garbled reply of the Rhino driver, she instead heard an angry shout in the background.

"Pinkie, quite shootin' up mah farm! They just got it fixed up, daggone it!"

"But Desty said I could shoot whatever I wanted!"

"I did say that. Pie, you may fire at will. Try not to hit our mission objectives, though."

"Okie-dokie-lokie!"

"HEY! Ah said QUIT IT!"

Lenna terminated the connection again, and then hauled herself upright. "So it seems your relative has returned."

"Eeyup," Big Mac started moving again, his nerves settled already. He was quite happy to hear that his sister was finally back; as crazy as things had been in Sweet Apple Acres with the new facilities and the Scavurel, he could only imagine what she had gone through in the heart of the Iron Warrior fortress.

But he had to disapprove of letting Pinkie Pie man a gun turret.

"Whoo! I'm a space pirate!" Pinkie shouted in glee as the stream of bolters finally ate all the way through the trunk and the apple tree teetered over. The Rhino pulled in ahead of them next to the farmhouse, and Big Mac could easily spot the excitable and brightly colored earth pony shuddering in time with the bursts from the combi-bolter turret. There was another Rhino behind it, and several other transports of different design were heading down the road and past the farm, leaving them behind.

"Mah trees! What did mah poor trees ever do to ya?!" came a shout from within the Rhino followed by a loud banging noise.

"Applejack, calm down!"

"Yeah, you almost hit the human booze!"

Lenna ignored the shouting as Big Macintosh carried her past the front of the Rhinos and toward the farmstead. "I've contacted the Scavurel and informed them of the situation. Additionally, I have a notice from Crabapple that your youngest sibling has likewise arrived."

The rear ramp of the Rhino dropped open, and Applejack promptly charged out, her lasso at the ready. "Ya daggone crazy pink piece of..."

She almost stumbled over her own hooves as she finally got a look at Sweet Apple Acres again for the first time since it was rebuilt.

"What in tarnation?" she gaped as she stared at the bunker complex, and then her gaze snapped from one new building to the next.

"Whoa! This is awesome!" Rainbow Dash said as she took off out of the transport, hovering above the farmer. "Your house looks like a bunch of bunkers stacked on top of each other!"

Applejack grimaced. "It ain't exactly homey, is it?"

"Well, look at it this way: with all that armor plating it has now, you may be able to go a full month without having to repair the barn," Rarity pointed out as she stepped out of the transport.

Twilight exited with Gaela, and the former gaped as she beheld the wonders that had become of the Apple family land.

"Ah, I see everything was completed according to specification," Gaela said, her voice sounding much less annoyed than usual as she studied the complex. Then she saw Big Mac, who was unhitching himself from the wagon.

"Macintosh, have you had time to inspect the facilities since completion?"

The red stallion stepped free of the wagon before nodding to the armored woman. "Eeyup."

"I made several modifications to standard pattern systems to make them more accessible to ungulates. Mostly replacing levers at waist and chest level with lever plates on the floor. Did you have any difficulty using them?"

"Nnope."

"I didn't recall the measurements of your barn footprint at the time of choosing a pattern for the central bestiary, but I selected a design based on the approximate needs of a small-scale facility. Is the volume sufficient?"

"Eeyup."

"Excellent." Gaela paused briefly. "On an unrelated note. I find your laconic speech patterns quite agreeable. If only all ponies were so pleasantly terse."

"Hey!" Twilight exclaimed, guessing that she had been used as a point of comparison.

"Ah don't get it. What're all these other doohickeys?" Applejack asked as she finally moved her attention past the farmstead. There were a few new structures besides her house and barn, and they didn't even look like anything she had seen in Ferrous Dominus.

"These are all necessary facilities for the practice of agriculture at any reasonable scale," Gaela explained, "plus a light generator to provide the necessary energy, since your power infrastructure can charitably be described as 'primordial'."

Twilight raised her foreleg into the air. "I would like to see the power core, please." She hadn't been allowed into the fusion reactor back in the fortress, and Applejack's description of the core had been limited to "a hot room with a lot of pipes and floatin' thingamajiggers."

"In a minute. Pilot, report," Gaela said, turning to Lenna.

The withered woman straightened, ignoring Rainbow Dash as the pegasus hovered over to her curiously. "I've contacted the Scavurel and they're preparing for departure. One of the Dregs has a fresh amputation, but otherwise damage has-"

"SWEET BABY LUNA!" Rainbow Dash suddenly screamed as she stared into the wagon. "Your legs are gone!"

The ponies (save Big Mac) and dragon recoiled in shock. Lenna was still in the wagon, so her lower torso was hidden from the grounded ponies.

"That's awful!" Twilight said, wincing. "That crash must've been terrible!"

"Ah'm so sorry," Applejack agreed, taking her hat off and holding it sadly against her chest, "if Ah hadn't wanted y'all to get mah farm rebuilt so soon-"

"I wasn't injured in the crash," Lenna interrupted irritably.

A stunned silence briefly dominated the gathering.

"Then... what happened to..." Rarity trailed off uncomfortably.

"They were in the way. So I got rid of them. Over a decade ago, in fact. In the Mechanicus extraneous limbs are replaced with more useful ones," Lenna explained, "can we drop the subject? I'm really quite tired of having to explain this to every equine I meet."

Most of the ponies didn't seem entirely comfortable simply leaving the topic at that, but none of them were willing to insist that she elaborate.

"So is that what happened to your eyes, too?" Rainbow Dash asked, poking at the blank visor.

"Oh, no. A daemonic harpy clawed them out. Hateful beasts, really; I'm glad the Iron Warriors don't employ them." Then she glanced down at Applejack. "So you needn't feel responsible for any injury on my part. You can feel bad about the Scavurel and Dark Acolytes who perished in the crash, though."

"Do you?" Rainbow Dash asked the pilot.

"Not really. They were all fundamentally awful people."

Rarity sighed. "Not to interrupt the constant outpour of gallows humor, but is there any chance I can get a helping hoof with my bags? Mister Dest isn't taking us into Ponyville proper."

"Eeyup." Big Macintosh started unloading the wagon to free up the space; he would need all of it to accommodate the luggage.

"Applejack, I'm going to go show the power station to Sparkle and explain its mechanisms. You can accompany us or inspect the facilities on your own," Gaela said as she walked away. Twilight followed while trying not to skip in joy. Spike remained behind, naturally, to help with Rarity's luggage.

After retrieving her saddlebags from the transport and walking into the complex, Applejack was somewhat discouraged to find it exactly as sterile and military-looking on the inside.

She supposed she couldn't complain, since an ugly free house was still leaps and bounds better than no free house, but it wouldn't be easy to furnish this place. Some of the interior from their old farmhouse had been salvaged, but even if they'd managed to save all their furniture, they now had more than double the floor space.

"Hey Granny, hey Bloom," Applejack said, greeting her family as she poked her head into the kitchen, "Ah'm back!"

"Big Sis!" Apple Bloom promptly jumped up from the table and galloped over to Applejack, almost leaping up onto her.

"Welcome back, dearie. I was just baking some apple pie for the young'ins," Granny Smith said as she placed a raw pie into a large metal receptacle.

As soon as the elderly mare withdrew her hooves, the door to the receptacle slid shut.

"Analyzing substrate material... adjusting core temperature..." crackled an electronic voice from the oven. A second later the door panel locked and the viewing glass glowed red.

Granny Smith raised an eyebrow. "Ah didn't even know it did that. Crazy newfangled contraptions."

"This place is gonna take some gettin' used to," Applejack mumbled as Apple Bloom pawed at her leg.

"Sis! Tell us about yer trip to the human fort!" the youngest Apple sibling begged. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle were seated in front of a low table in front of Granny Smith, but looked extremely interested as well.

Applejack sighed. "Oh, ya know, it went about as expected. Some evil space wizard messed with mah head, the Tau showed up to make a mess o' things, and Ah had to stare down a giant Iron Warrior with huge robot spider legs. Then Ah trampled some alien floozy and got plastered fer most of the rest of the trip."

The fillies seemed appropriately impressed by the extremely abridged tale of heroics, and Sweetie Belle piped up next.

"What about my sister?"

"Rarity mostly complained a lot. In her defense, most of it was legit," Applejack said with a shrug, causing Sweetie to wilt in disappointment. "She did pick up an unhealthy interest in them human weapons while we were there, though. Ah hope she stows that thing somewhere safe."

"Did you go to space?!" Scootaloo asked, her tiny wings twitching in excitement.

"Ah did not. Ah was too busy beatin' up grayskins and samplin' the local beverages," Applejack said curtly, walking past the fillies, "Ah did bring y'all some souvenirs, though."

She reached into her saddlebags and pulled out several objects as the young ponies squealed in excitement below.

"Ah got this star amulet from some sketchy guy wearin' incense burners with books tied to his back and stuff. This thing is called an 'auspex'. Ah picked it up off the street durin' the attack. And then we have a banner with the Iron Skull on it. Not really the nicest decoration, but it IS from space."

She laid out the items on the counter, and the fillies stood over them, their eyes gleaming.

Sweetie's excitement faded somewhat as she looked at the Chaos amulet. "That thing kind of makes my horn hurt."

Applejack shrugged. "Then ya should probably take somethin' else."

Sweetie Belle quickly nabbed the auspex as Scootaloo took the amulet she had duly rejected. Apple Bloom looked giddy as she spread out the banner, which was a jet black standard with the Iron Skull superimposed over a golden Chaos Star.

"Thanks, Sis! You're the best!" Apple Bloom said brightly.

"Thank you, Miss Applejack!"

"No sweat, girls. Now Ah'll see ya'll later. Ah gotta see about turnin' one of the cells in this fancy bunkhouse into a proper bedroom." Applejack walked off as the young ponies prodded their new belongings.

Sweetie Belle stared down at the auspex, the gears in her head turning.

"You know, Apple Bloom... I just thought of something."

"What's that, Sweetie Belle?" Apple Bloom said as she folded up her new banner.

"Well, between Crabapple, the Scavurel, and your sister actually touring the human fortress, your family knows more about the aliens than anypony else in Equestria."

Scootaloo blinked. "Hey, yeah! And we've gotten to know them a lot better too just from talking to Geth and the others! And now we even have some alien stuff!"

"We already had plenty of alien stuff," Apple Bloom pointed out, "Big Mac was haulin' wreckage into the new barn all yesterday."

"Okay, fine, alien stuff that wasn't recently on fire," Scootaloo corrected, putting the amulet on over her head.

"Never mind that! What if studying aliens is our special talent?" Sweetie Belle asked brightly.

Apple Bloom's eyes widened. "Isn't that really dangerous, though?"

Sweetie gave her a look. "... So what?"

"Ya gotta point there," the yellow filly admitted.

"This is going to be so awesome! Maybe we'll get to visit the Iron Warriors fortress too!" Scootaloo cheered.

"Cutie Mark Crusader..." the three young ponies began.

"ALIEN HUNTERS!" crowed Apple Bloom and Scootaloo.

Sweetie Belle frowned. "I was thinking 'xenobiologists,' actually."

"Pft. That isn't even a word," Scootaloo scoffed.

"It is so a word!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Foodstuff has reached optimal grain consistency. Deactivating heat source. Door locks disengaged," interrupted the oven.

"Pie's done already? My, that was quick," Granny Smith mumbled.

"Additionally, the correct term is xenologis," crackled the grating, electronic voice.

"See? Even the oven knows better!"

"Oh, shut up Scoots."

****

Ponyville - Twilight's library

Twilight yawned as she stepped inside her treehouse, already a bit tired despite it barely being past noon.

She mostly blamed Rarity for that, since they had spent quite some time helping her bring her luggage into her boutique. How the unicorn had even packed that much on her own was a mystery.

"It feels good to be back home again," the alicorn mused.

"I wouldn't know," Gaela said blandly as she entered behind the purple pony.

Spike came in behind her. "I'm kind of surprised you decided to stay with us instead of that merchant guy."

"I could, if you wish, but I'd prefer not to," Gaela offered simply, "I dislike Master Delgan considerably. His affection for opulence and luxury disagrees with me, and his influence among my masters grates at my nerves."

Twilight giggled. "It's fine, you can stay here. Spike, you can take off that pack now."

"FINALLY," the young dragon grumbled, sliding off the boxy leather backpack he had been constantly wearing since they left, "I've been practically attached to this stupid thing the entire time. You even made me clutch it in my sleep."

Gaela quirked her eyebrow. "What is inside?"

"Oh, uh... jewelry," Twilight answered tepidly, "very important jewelry."

Spike unbuttoned the pack and slid out the wooden box inside. "Yeah. Jewelry nopony even wore."

"Well, we should be thankful for that," Twilight murmured as she started unpacking her own bags.

Spike cracked the box open.

"... Hey, Twi? Uh... are we TOTALLY sure that Princess Celestia left us the Elements of Harmony?"

Twilight's ear twitched, and she froze.

"Spike," she said calmly, still facing away from the dragon, "why would you ask that?"

"Well, Princess Celestia does make mistakes," Spike said, his voice sounding increasingly desperate as droplets of sweat beaded on his forehead, "or... or it could have been a test! To see if you could resolve the problem without them! In which case, you totally passed!"

"Spiiiiiiiike..." Twilight said dangerously as she turned around, her horn flickering. "What's in the box that Princess Celestia gave us?"

Spike just made an incoherent noise in the back of his throat, so Gaela reached down and snapped up the case.

Looking inside, her one remaining eyebrow arched again.

"I take it this isn't what you were expecting?" Gaela asked flatly as she turned the case around to show the alicorn.

Twilight's pupils shrunk to pinpricks as she stared at the contents. Bundled in the cavity where the six Elements had been stacked was a single large, heavy amulet. The general shape was a Chaos Star made of ebony, although in the middle of it was a closed eye made of gold. Attached to the back of the accessory was an iron circuit wafer of some sort threaded with wires, and the amulet hung from a loop of heavy, tarnished chains.

There was a folded sheet of parchment below the amulet, but Twilight was so stunned and enraged by the sight of the Chaos artifact that she didn't notice it until Gaela plucked it from the box.

The Dark Acolyte unfolded the parchment and then placed it in the grip of her servo arm so that it hung in front of her eyes.

"Dearest Princess," Gaela began as she read the letter, "I'm sure you've noticed by now that I have confiscated the sorcerous artifacts that you thought to smuggle into Ferrous Dominus. Please understand that this seizure of your property is simply the enforcement of our security measures, and not in any way an act of specific harassment or retribution."

Twilight's teeth clenched and her eye started to twitch. She already recognized the general tone of the letter, and she could only think of one individual among the 38th Company who would recognize her "sorcerous artifacts" for what they were.

"I realize that this may severely disadvantage you," Gaela continued, "so I have opted to gift you with a personally sanctioned substitute that you may use at will within the confines of our fortress. I realize that it may be inadequate, especially as I had only one amulet to offer despite confiscating several artifacts, but I'm sure you understand the limits of my position." Gaela paused to snort at that. "You may keep the amulet, as I will not be returning your artifacts. Sincerely-"

"SEEEEEEEEERRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTH!!!"

****

Ferrous Dominus - Serith's quarters

"My, what temper," Serith said to himself as he stared up at the ceiling, feeling the reverberations through the Warp.

Such hatred, when given a name and focused by a powerful psyker directed to another, could cross entire sectors. Being within the same nation meant that he heard it almost as if Twilight was in the next room.

"Really, it's about time. I expected her to find out long before she left," the Sorcerer mumbled as he made some adjustments to the servo-skull hovering above his workbench.

Behind him, within a contraption of spinning gearwork and wild bundles of sparking wires, the Element of Loyalty was strung up into a sophisticated conduit strung with sensors and amplifiers.

"Servo skull, activation command: begin recording in file 773-A. Title: Elements of Harmony, Analysis."

Serith backed away from the servo skull and then placed a hand on the bizarre contraption behind him before he spoke again.

"I am now beginning intense analysis of the so-called 'Elements of Harmony,' confiscated from Twilight Sparkle during the Tau incursion earlier this week. Preliminary study leads me to believe that these objects are psionic weapons of some sort; there was talk of them being used against us, and much discussion of their likely efficacy against the Iron Warriors' military might."

He pointed to the Element of Loyalty. "This necklace with the lightning bolt is to be my first test case. I have determined that the Elements emit a sort of 'seeking signal'. A psionic wavelength that acts as a sort of key to safeguard the artifact. This sort of effect is... rare, but not unheard of. What is extremely unusual is the sheer complexity of the wavelength key that would match the signal. Often, such mechanisms use fairly simple emotional concept such as rage, or joy, perhaps coupled with a psychic image to act as a reaction test. In the case of the Elements, however, the wavelengths are deeply layered and extremely complicated, to the point that I cannot make any meaningful effort to disentangle them. I believe a direct test of psycant resonance may yield better results."

Serith paused. "It should be noted that some of these items react... strangely when handled. The one with the fruit-shaped jewel actually burned my gauntlet, and they don't move easily with telekinesis."

The Sorcerer shrugged. "On the other hand, these artifacts belonged to the ponies, a species which cannot be described as very hostile or security-conscious. Even their capability with psychic power, while advanced in its uses, are based on several complete misunderstandings as to its nature. They still call it 'magic', for one. I am confident that whatever feeble secrets these amusing little creatures keep, I can unravel."

He turned to the device and powered it on with a thought; gears started turning while black strings of power sparked along the cable attached to the Element of Loyalty.

"Beginning resonance."

****

Ferrous Dominus - Trixie's quarters

"So that's why I want to find a cook book and have a real kitchen installed. It would be better for both of us if you could prepare meals here rather than having to eat that slop in the cafeteria or those gross nutrient rations," Trixie said as she read a dataslate while laying across Suuna's lap.

"Of course, Mistress. That would give me more to do during the day, as well," Suuna agreed as she brushed Trixie's mane.

Suddenly the floor shook underneath them, and Trixie found herself being hugged tightly by her assistant as the roar of a furious explosion reverberated through the hallway outside.

After a few seconds the shaking stopped, and they both listened fearfully for alarm klaxons.

"I'M OKAY!" shouted Serith from down the hall.

****

Ponyville - Twilight's library

"That rotten, lying, cheating, evil, awful, no-good, revolting, reviled, malicious, terrible, filthy, vile, evil-"

"You said evil already," Gaela interrupted absently as she studied the Chaos amulet with her optics.

"Rrrrrrrrrrrrgh!" Twilight's horn pulsed with fury as if she were trying to destroy the subject of her ire then and there, from across the country. Which she might have been, for all Gaela knew.

"SPIKE!" Twilight barked, causing the young dragon to flinch. "You had ONE JOB!"

Spike stumbled backward fearfully. "I don't know what happened! I didn't let the backpack out of my sight once, I swear! I literally hugged it to me while I slept!"

"Then how did this happen?" the alicorn demanded angrily, advancing on the dragon dangerously.

"I don't know! I really don't!" Spike protested.

"While I don't mean to make excuses for the weakness of your servant," Gaela began, closing the box, "what, exactly, do you suppose he could have done to protect your artifacts from Lord Serith?"

Twilight turned her angry gaze toward Gaela. "He could have... he... I mean..."

She trailed off as the gears in her head turned. Serith had the Elements, apparently, but Spike said he'd never left the backpack. She had seen firsthand that Serith could casually change the way that people's minds worked to erase his presence or even cause them to shoot an ally in the back. It was hardly any great presumption to think he could manipulate memories too, or put a target to sleep on a whim. What COULD Spike do against that?

Twilight was confident that she herself would prove more resistant, but where had SHE been when the Elements were taken? She didn't know. She hadn't really bothered to keep track of Spike while in Ferrous Dominus. There were plenty of times she had been separated from him without even thinking about it.

Spike blinked as Twilight's expression gradually shifted from furious to annoyed to crestfallen.

"This... This is MY fault," Twilight admitted sadly, hanging her head, "I was responsible for the Elements, not you, Spike. I pushed that responsibility onto you and then just ignored you while we were in the fortress."

Her tone became more bitter. "I mean, we don't even know when Serith took the Elements because I never even thought to check on them! If it weren't for you checking on them just now I would've handed the box right back to the Princess and not known what was wrong until she told me!" Twilight looked horrified at the thought.

"Do you think she'd like the Chaos amulet?" Gaela asked as she placed the box down.

"No, she's not really a fan," Spike assured her.

Twilight pulled her head up, giving her assistant a miserable, pleading look. "I'm sorry for getting mad at you, Spike."

Spike scratched the back of his head. "Are you also sorry for leaving the Elements with me and making me the target of an evil space wizard in the first place?"

"Don't push it, Spike."

"Okay."

Gaela started perusing the book shelves, only distantly interested in Twilight's current problem. "So what do you intend to do to get these weapons back? Or are you going to abandon them to Lord Serith?"

Twilight frowned, gazing down at the floor. "We'll have to go back and take them back from him."

"That's an effort doomed to fail. Challenging the Sorcerer will be perilous enough. Challenging him on his territory, where he has already effectively and easily bested you, is a fool's errand."

Twilight gave Gaela an annoyed look. "I'm not necessarily talking about fighting him."

"Neither am I," the Acolyte assured her, plucking a book from the shelf, "if you try to fight him you're going to lose, without question. Trying to outsmart him offers at least a slim possibility of success, but you'll need a better plan than that."

Twilight fumed silently for several seconds, and then her expression darkened. "I... I really don't know what to do. I've faced villains before, but I've always known where they stand. What they wanted."

The alicorn sat down on her haunches. "Serith is... different. I can't figure him out. He acts like a friend but isn't sincere enough about it to fool anypony. If he wanted to hurt me or somepony else, he had plenty of opportunities, but he helped us instead. And when I stood up to him to save Daniels, he didn't even try to get his way... even though I'm pretty sure he accomplished what he wanted. Then I only find out what he's done long after I left. What is he after?"

Gaela started flipping through the book, skimming its contents. "I can't imagine. I doubt anybody can, even his fellow witches. Lord Serith is positively ancient, mercurial, and regarded as bizarre even by his brother Iron Warriors. The only one who can claim to know him well is the Warsmith himself."

Spike scratched his chin. "Do you think Solon would help us? He was actually pretty friendly the first time we met him."

Gaela glared at Spike over the top edge of the book. "The Warsmith was RATIONAL, not friendly. And he'll be equally rational when being informed that Lord Serith took a set of sorcerous weapons from you with which you probably intended to attack him."

Twilight winced badly, her ears pinned to the side of her head. It was a quite a wrinkle in the situation that Serith's excuse for taking the Elements, while certainly disingenuous, was still perfectly legitimate.

"Do you have any advice, Gaela?" the alicorn asked hopefully.

Gaela went back to the book she had picked out. "Yes. Learn to use the Chaos amulet, because you'll never see your artifacts again. Also, you may wish to take greater care not to cross Lord Serith in the future."

"We can't abandon the Elements of Harmony!" Twilight insisted.

"Without a deeper explanation of why this is so, I can hardly advise you to challenge an Iron Warrior for the sake of some trinket," Gaela explained, closing the book and sliding it back into place, "in any case, with Master Delgan preparing to set up shop in your nation and introduce himself to your leaders, you'll have ample opportunity to gripe about the Company's actions."

Twilight sighed and chewed her lip. She was in trouble, but perhaps not as much as she had first thought. Certainly there had to be advantages to having an enemy that didn't treat you like an enemy.

"I think I have an idea," Twilight mumbled as she made her way upstairs, "Spike, could you open the library for me, please? I'll be in my room."

"Sooo... no letter to Princess Celestia?" Spike said with a quirked eyebrow.

Twilight almost miss-stepped, but caught herself. "Not yet, no. I need to prepare some things first."

****

???

"And now, for Trixie's next trick, Trixie will summon a monster from the very air!"

Trixie raised her hooves in the air as a cluster of spotlights centered on her, feeling her cape flap in a warm breeze.

Stretched out before her as far as the eye could see was her audience. Her public. Her devoted admirers. Humans, ponies, dragon, minotaurs, and even Space Marines were packed together among the seats and walls to watch, and enormous viewing screens were mounted further afield to project her glorious image even further.

Trixie's horn flared with magic, though it was hidden beneath her wizard hat.

Within moments, a pink mist seeped upward from the floor, followed by a flash of light.

When the light abated, Serith stood next to Trixie, looking back and forth as if he didn't know where he was.

"Serith! Whatever are you doing here?" Trixie asked with mock surprise. "Trixie was trying to summon a monster!"

As the audience laughed, Trixie sighed into the vox headset. "Well, Trixie supposes there's no helping it. Take off your helmet and say hello to the audience."

The Iron Warrior wordlessly reached up to take his helmet by the horns, and then lifted it up.

The audience gasped as they beheld a horrific daemon with a half-dozen eyes and a rictus mouth underneath the helmet, its Warp-flesh squirming and glistening under the intense light.

"There's Trixie's monster!" the blue unicorn said, knocking a hoof against her head. "Where did you get Serith's armor? You so silly!"

The daemon roared as the armor containing its body split apart, spilling its numerous bladed limbs onto the stage while murderous eyes tried to choose a target.

"Yeah, okay, Trixie's done with you now," the unicorn said nonchalantly as magic energy surged around her and formed a magic circle.

A lance of magical lightning slammed into the creature from above, and the hoots and cheers coming from the humans and post-humans in the audience doubled in volume as the Warp beast was reduced to a black stain on the stage.

"TRIX-IE! TRIX-IE! TRIX-IE!" chanted the crowd loud enough to make the ground shake. Humans clapped, ponies pounded the ground, and minotaurs beat their chests. The adulation was almost suffocating, but Trixie drank it all in and took a bow.

"Marvelous! Simply marvelous!" exclaimed a group of ponies that walked up onto the stage. They were very well-dressed and had immaculately styled manes, along with numerous shiny accessories that marked them out as members of the upper class to anypony who cared.

Trixie wasn't one of those ponies, but she accepted praise from anyone, whether the most meager vagrant or self-absorbed noble.

"A stunning performance!"

"You simply MUST perform at my events from now on!"

"I cried tears of joy and laughter!"

"Where art We now?"

It took a few moments for Trixie to realize that one of her fawning public was a bit... different than the others. It was strange, but her mildly annoyed voice sounded much clearer and her features seemed much more distinct than that of the clamoring ponies around her. Trixie could barely see much of her head amongst the crowd though, so she couldn't establish much other than the pony having a dark blue coat and an unusually long and pointed horn.

Then, as if in response to her attention, the other ponies shifted aside and Trixie got a good look at the figure.

"Ah! You must be Princess Luna! It's an honor to have you at my show!" Trixie said brightly. She had never met Luna before, or even seen a good picture of her, but there weren't so many alicorns around that one could easily lose track of who was who.

Luna glanced over at Trixie, and then she looked up at the banners hung over the stage.

"So thy name is 'Trixie', then?"

Trixie's smile faded somewhat. "Ah... is there a reason you're at Trixie's show when you don't know who Trixie is?"

Luna nodded, looking somewhat exasperated. "We were unable to find Twilight Sparkle, despite the absence of the strange barrier we encountered last time."

"Twilight Sparkle? Never heard of her!" said one of the nearby audience ponies in a needlessly loud voice.

"That's kind of a silly name, isn't it?" asked another mare, giggling to herself.

Luna looked annoyed, and then her horn started to glow. "This is quite annoying. It shalt be easier to speak without such noise."

Trixie didn't get the chance to ask what she was talking about before a flare of light burst from Luna's horn, briefly obscuring Trixie's vision before she could even blink.

When she did finish blinking, the unicorn saw that she was now facing the Princess alone; every other human, pony, and other sort of creature had completely vanished without leaving even the scorch mark that had remained from the daemon's departure.

"Wh-What did you do? What happened to Trixie's audience?" Trixie asked, backing up fearfully as she whipped her head around.

"We hast banished the dream-constructs that hath populated thy fantasy," Luna explained, stepping up fully onto the stage so that she could stare down at Trixie properly, "now we may speak without interruption or diversion."

The gears in Trixie's mind started grinding away as she put several new facts together.

Luna had apparently banished a crowd of dream-constructs.

That meant she was asleep and dreaming.

This also suggested that Luna was not a product of her dream.

That meant Luna, Princess of the night, had seen fit to interrupt her dreams in order to speak to her.

Trixie's ears fell flat against her head. "Is Trixie in trouble?" she asked nervously.

"That depends on thine answers," Luna said as she stared down at the showpony with a bemused expression, "if thee cooperates, then there is little cause for concern."

Trixie gulped.

"We came here for Twilight Sparkle, yet cannot sense her within this cage of death and smoke. What hast befallen her?" the dark alicorn demanded.

"Uh... Trixie is pretty sure she just went home."

Luna gave her an incredulous look.

"Well, that's all Trixie knows about it," the unicorn insisted quickly, "something might have happened to her since then, Trixie supposes, but Sparkle bade Trixie goodbye this morning. Did you check in Ponyville?"

Luna lowered her head as her eyes narrowed. "Nay, we did not." Then she stepped closer to Trixie, looking suspicious. "And how is it that thou lingers here after Twilight Sparkle's departure? Hast thou cast in thy lot with the invaders?"

"Trixie just works here," Trixie insisted, becoming increasingly annoyed. Even after Twilight's mission was a complete success and she had moved on, somehow the purple brat was STILL causing her problems.

This seemed to surprise the Princess. "What dost thou do for an army of aliens from beyond the stars?"

"This," Trixie said flatly, gesturing all around with her hoof.

Luna glanced about, taking in the sight of the posters with Trixie's grinning face and huge hanging banners bearing her cutie mark.

"Thou must enjoy thy work a great deal, to dream of it while at rest," Luna remarked.

"You know, this all seems like a completely unnecessary invasion of Trixie's privacy. Couldn't you have bothered one of the humans instead?" Trixie grumbled. "Serith warned Trixie that Trixie's dreams might be troubled after he accidentally broke the psycho-whatever shield, but Trixie wasn't expecting the trouble to come from other ponies."

Luna considered this, frowning. "We suppose thou hast ample reason for complaint. We were quite curious to find thee still present when We sensed no other ponies, and hast no particular reason to interrogate thee."

"So does that mean that Trixie can go back to her previously scheduled fantasy now?" the unicorn asked hopefully.

"Aye, this is acceptable," Luna agreed, "unless thou wishes to accompany us as we accost Warsmith Solon."

Trixie's eyebrow rose.

****

???, but a different ??? than before

Solon rolled the Tau disruptor drone about in his hands as he studied its power transmitters, noting the way that the surface armor seemed to react unusually with light even in the absence of a proper power source. As his eyes traced the surface of the device, parts of it seemed to fade away, only to reappear with the slightest movement of his pupils.

It was a magnificent device, more devoted to invisibility than even the Tau stealth suits; the stealth armor served primarily to spoil the aim of anything targeting it rather than remain totally undetected, but this drone, not having to worry about erratic energy discharges or rapid movement, was designed to be totally missed by patrolling soldiers who could have wandered within arm's reach. Even most Space Marine visor systems wouldn't have picked it up.

Solon's workbench was located on the observation deck of a massive warship, and aside from the flooring and door one could see the void all around them.

Currently that void was filled by a huge armada of spacecraft. Battle barges, cruisers, and thousands of fighters danced through space among raking volleys of deadly light as two Space Marine Legions tore each other apart. Every few seconds another ship would buckle and fall apart in the distance, leaking fire and debris, but Solon didn't let the distant havoc distract him.

The door opening behind him, however, had his attention immediately.

"Is this going to be a regular thing now?" Solon asked, glancing behind him. "I usually wouldn't bother to take another rest cycle just a day after the last one, but I had to cut it short thanks to you."

Luna snorted as she walked into the observatorium, clearly unsympathetic. "We shalt invade thy dreams as We deem necessary, Warsmith. Do not think that thou art free of our influence."

Solon released an annoyed sigh. "Why is Miss Trixie with you?"

Luna glanced behind her as Trixie stepped into the room cautiously, totally overwhelmed by the inner workings of the space ship. "We happened to enter her own dream earlier, and thought she might wish to accompany us. Thy dreams hath quite a... grand and realistic quality to them."

"That's because they're digitally recorded memories," Solon said flatly as he went back to his work, "calling them 'dreams' is a bit like referring to a pict-capture as a 'drawing'."

Trixie slowly stepped up to the wall of the observatorium with awe, staring up at the ships burning above them.

"What... What IS this? What is Trixie looking at?"

"This is the battle of Phall," Solon explained absently, "see those ships painted yellow? Those belong to the Seventh Legion, the Imperial Fists. The Sons of Horus trapped them here, and then we entered the system to kill them all."

Luna and Trixie walked a slow circuit around the observatorium, staring up at the flaring lights and glimmering hulks of metal. Luna's expression was serene and approving, like she was quietly enjoying a nice art gallery. Trixie's was more akin to childlike awe. Even after meeting actual aliens and personally seeing honest-to-Celestia vessels capable of flying through space, she hadn't been anywhere close to prepared to witness something like this.

Solon was content to let the ponies stare, glad that Luna was distracted. He had assumed that if she had slipped into his dreams again that she'd try to assault him, and he had taken appropriate countermeasures. He was glad to see that she didn't seem interested in fighting, or was at least being subtle about her intention to assassinate him this time.

Trixie finally peeled her gaze away from the space battle to stare at Solon instead.

"So... is this what you look like without your armor?" Trixie asked. The Chaos Lord was wearing nothing but a black bodysuit that clung to his form and sealed the nerve sockets and circulatory inserts in his skin. It was a completely different image than the horrifying, clanking monstrosity of his armored chassis, and Trixie wouldn't have thought the two could be the same if Luna hadn't told her ahead of time who they were visiting.

"This is what I looked like once, yes," Solon mumbled, cracking open the disruptor drone's gravitational regulator, "the flesh you see here is long gone in my physical body."

Luna's ears twitched in interest, as she hadn't yet seen Solon's physical form.

"Do you ever... miss it? I mean, the parts below the waist, at least?" Trixie asked, trying her hardest to be diplomatic about the question.

"What, my legs? No. I have six of them now, and much higher carrying and power generation capacity than before." He turned the gravitational regulator over, checking for any irregularities in its design. "Aside from the brain, everything in the human body can be easily replaced, and inevitably improved upon. I'm far more capable now than in the past."

"Then why do you dream of yourself like this?" Trixie asked, beckoning to his body.

"For hollow nostalgia, mostly. I didn't lose my first limb until the siege of Terra," Solon grunted, detaching the regulator and studying the circuit threading on an armor panel, "so when I view a given period, I also take the form I possessed during that period."

"Fascinating. May we visit thy siege next?" Luna asked, still staring at the space battle.

"No. My mind is not a galactic tour bus," Solon grumbled, "I'm trying to work, here."

As Luna pouted, a pair of torpedoes blasted through space past the observatorium, coming close enough that they could see the rivet work on the shell casing.

Trixie yelped in surprise at seeing the huge weapons speed by. "Mister Solon? Is this place safe?"

Solon paused to consider the question. "As a matter of fact, it's not. In fifty-eight seconds the frigate you see coming up behind that battlecruiser wreck is going to release a volley that takes down this ship's void shields and punctures the observatorium. The memory coils survived, though, and the recorders can work fine in hard vacuum, so it still captured the rest of the battle from this viewpoint."

Trixie's eyes widened. "Then Trixie has to get out of here!"

"Why? You're a mental projection. You can't die, never mind die of something as passive and mundane as void exposure," Solon insisted.

"Trixie isn't so sure about that! Trixie is new to this sort of thing!" the blue unicorn protested in a panic.

Luna squinted at one particular vessel in the distance and beckoned to it. "Is that the one thou speaks of?"

"Yes. What was it... Valiant Death, I believe it's called."

"A fitting name! Have at thee, villain!" Luna shouted, her eyes flaring a solid white as her horn lit up.

Trixie and even Solon looked startled as a half-dozen identical copies of the torpedoes from before flickered into existence in a ring around the frigate.

The torpedoes finished materializing and then thundered forward, smashing into the enemy ship before its crew could even figured out was what happening, never mind react. The void shields fell instantly, and in seconds the ship was swallowed by explosions as the massive weapons tore the vessel apart from the inside.

"Ha ha! That shalt teach thee to oppose us!" Luna cheered triumphantly at the cloud of burning debris that used to be a spacecraft.

"What are you doing?" Solon asked irritably, standing up from his workbench.

"We art defending us from thine enemy," Luna answered blithely, as if the question was absurd.

"I told you, this is a memory, not a procedurally generated fantasy," Solon growled, "you can't just change a major part of the battle like that! The cogitator doesn't know what to do!"

"We do not understand thy umbrage," Luna said, "what difference doth this make?"

It was about then that the floor flickered. It shifted, quivered, and then reasserted itself beneath them without shifting any of them at all.

"That was weird," Trixie observed needlessly.

Above them, the space battle had frozen. Not stopped, in the sense that the ships had ceased firing, but literally frozen, with ordnance and lances suspended in the void on their way to their targets.

"We art confused," Luna admitted, "doth this mean We hast won?"

Then the entire world around them turned a solid blue, accompanied by a constant buzzing sound.

"Oh, this is just perfect," Solon snapped, noting that the disruptor drone was gone along with everything else but himself and the two ponies. "The model is gone and now I have to go reboot the entire cogitator bank. I do hope you're proud of yourself, Princess."

"We hast inflicted upon the foe such a mighty blow that it hath crippled reality itself and thus banished the entirety of the enemy force," Luna said with a satisfied nod, "aye, We art quite proud."

"Lovely," the Warsmith grumbled as his body started to shimmer away. Within moments, he was gone.

Trixie frowned as she glanced around her, seeing nothing but blue and the occasional scrap of white text that seemed to convey nothing but gibberish.

"Mister Solon seemed pretty agitated. Trixie wonders if it's a good idea to annoy him."

Luna snorted. "Speaking plainly, it is our goal to oust him from our planet and banish his armies to the cold, merciless void from whence they came. We care nothing for his peace."

Trixie grimaced. "Is it too late to go back to Trixie's dream?"

A new string of text, significantly less cryptic than the rest, appeared between the two ponies.

Reboot cycle activated. Terminating program in 3... 2...

"Aye," Luna confirmed, "We believe it is."

And then the world collapsed around them.

****

Ponyville - the following day

Rarity hummed to herself happily as she strolled through town, enjoying the crisp morning air and its stark contrast to the smoky filth that polluted the exterior of Ferrous Dominus. She supposed it was a frequent advantage of being called upon to travel to awful places that it made it much easier to appreciate the clean, simple pleasures of living in Ponyville.

Spotting Delgan's trailer at the end of a row of buildings, she headed straight for it. Despite being smaller than the surrounding houses, it was quite easy to find; not only was the trailer extremely gaudy with golden gargoyles and tall crimson banners hoisted into the air, but it was located behind a fortified barricade and next to a group of Chimera transports parked in a tight square.

Rarity paid the defenses no heed as she trotted up to the trailer. The quad guns turned to track her as a target as she walked up to the perimeter, and she could feel the curious gazes of the human guards manning the barricade as she walked past them. But she ignored them and they eventually did the same to her.

The exception was a burly figure in heavy carapace armor that stood in front of the trailer entrance and carried a flamer against his chest. He very deliberately stood up straighter as the white unicorn approached, and spoke up well before she got within arm's reach.

"That's close enough. State your name and your business here, xeno."

Rarity halted. "My name is Rarity. I'm here to see Norris."

The guard was wearing a full face mask complete with optic array and respirator, but Rarity could STILL see the man's hesitation when she used Delgan's first name.

"Do you have an appointment... Miss Rarity?" the guard sounded like he had almost choked trying to say her name with a measure of respect, suddenly afraid that she was somepony important. It was almost cute, really.

"Oh, no, I just thought I'd drop in and welcome him to town. You know, see if he had gotten settled yet."

The guard nodded slowly, and then reluctantly reached for his vox unit.

He hesitated, however. "Why are you armed?"

Rarity had the boltgun that she had scavenged in Ferrous Dominus in her right saddlebag, although it was barely recognizable by now. It had been painted a dull purple so as not to overpower her cutie mark, which had been stuck under the casing ejection slot in decal. The entire thing had a new glossy coating, and it was slung in a dark purple holster that Rarity had made to match her mane color and then made into a full saddlebag.

Rarity sighed over-dramatically. "These are dangerous times in Equestria. Aliens can come pouring into town at any moment and evil creatures prowl the wild. Were that I could defend myself with my wits alone I would be well-suited to go without such awful weapons, but as things stand I resort to your human tools." She smirked. "I'm sure Norris understands. Looking at you, he's clearly a man who knows the value of security."

The guard nodded absently, placing a hand to the side of his head. "Master Delgan?" He paused. "Yes, Sir. There's a xeno here to see you, Sir. She calls herself Rarity?" Another pause. "Yes, Sir, that's her. Yes, Sir."

The guard took the hand from the side of his head and then stepped to the side, swiping his hand over a scanning panel.

"You're clear. Please leave your weapon at the door inside, Miss Rarity."

"Of course," she said absently, barely even listening to the soldier as she entered.

Once inside the trailer, Rarity paused briefly to marvel at the interior. There wasn't so much as a sliver of gunmetal on display, with the walls and ceiling wallpapered in ivory and fine silks hanging in large bolts from pins on the ceiling. Paintings were hanging from the walls, mainly of Iron Warriors with unusually elaborate armor, and numerous polished weapons hung at the back of the living space above a plush-looking bed.

"Miss Rarity! I cannot express enough my gratitude to see you again," Delgan said as he entered the "living room" from another room that took up the front-most section of the trailer. He was wearing the same type of outfit as the previous day, although Rarity's tailoring-honed eyes could spot several minute details that proved it was a different uniform.

"This is simply wonderful to behold," she admitted as she stepped forward, looking up at one of the paintings, "the psyker dorms were practically opulent compared to those of the menials, and according to Rainbow Dash the Astartes live no better. It warms my heart to see this and know there's at least ONE among you humans that appreciates real civilization."

Delgan's demeanor turned solemn. "You shouldn't hold it against my fellow humans. Many would doubtless appreciate such fine living, but they lack the means. And the permissions."

Rarity's eyes glanced toward him briefly. "Permissions?"

"The Iron Warriors have a special distaste for luxury," Delgan said sourly, standing next to the unicorn as he stared intently at his own paintings, "they see decadence and hedonism not only as a weakness, but a corruption. Any hint of excess in their combat troopers is stamped out ruthlessly to prevent the spread of potential Slaaneshi worship."

"Slaaneshi? I'm not familiar with that term," Rarity admitted, turning fully toward the man.

"The less you know about it, the better," Delgan admitted, "their grudge against the Prince of Excess is quite old, and the history complicated. To say nothing of the theology. But suffice to say, my men and I are only allowed such fine living because it goes hand-in-hand with our duties and because we are not military men. And even then I am watched very carefully for any signs of... deviancy."

He shook his head. "But enough. You come to welcome me and I trouble you with the politics of dark gods and Space Marines! Put down your weapon and make yourself comfortable!"

Rarity gladly took him up on his offer, levitating her saddlebags onto a brass coat rack next to the door. Then she stepped over to a small plush chair on the opposite side of the room and sat down.

"I trust you had no trouble setting up? I was slightly worried that you wouldn't be able to simply move into Ponyville without me or one of my friends to vouch for you," Rarity asked. Not that any of her friends were likely to do such a thing; given the personalities that they'd had to deal with so far from the 38th Company, every one of the soldiers and agents were distrusted by default.

"A little bit, actually," Delgan admitted as he sat down opposite the snow-colored pony, "after entering the village perimeter I went looking for a local authority to inquire about the proper permits and local ordinances in order to park everything. I was eventually directed to your mayor, but she seemed quite agitated at the prospect of humans leasing land in Ponyville."

Rarity placed a hoof against her chest, looking deeply concerned. "Oh, dear. I hope you were able to resolve the matter peacefully."

"But of course," Delgan assured her with a smile, "I deal chiefly in trade, not murder. I was able to offer her a security detail in return for allowing me the use of this space. There was simply no way she could refuse!"

****

Ponyville - City Hall

Mayor Mare stared pensively at the two men in carapace armor standing on either side of the entrance to her office.

"So... how long are you going to be 'guarding me,' exactly?"

"Until our shift is over and our replacements arrive," rasped one of the men from behind a black visor and respirator.

"No, I meant how long is this whole... agreement going to last?" Mare asked, trying not choke on the word "agreement".

"Until Master Delgan says so. Until then, your safety is assured," the guard explained.

"Until Master Delgan says so," the other guard repeated.

The pony's ears flattened against her head. "Is there any chance you could do your bodyguarding out in the hall, at least?"

The two men considered that for a moment, their visors turning toward each other.

"Oh, well, we would..."

"But that would make it harder to get to you in case of an emergency."

"I mean, a xeno battlesuit could fly right up to that window and put a pulse shot through you, and if we were in the hall we wouldn't know until we heard you screaming."

"Yes. Much safer to stay in here, where we can see you and what you're doing at all times."

Mayor Mare sighed, a single tear crawling down her cheek.

****

Ponyville - Delgan's trailer

"In any case, that's all sorted out, now. I have the permissions I need to stay on a temporary basis, and I've even called in for a shipment so I can open up a little flea market here," Delgan said with a grin, "I doubt your people are much in need of nutrient paste or autoguns, but I'm sure we humans have cobbled together something you might like.

"Oh, indeed. After seeing Applejack's farm, there's no doubt at all that you have things we could use," Rarity agreed, "the door mechanism in particular was very clever."

"Yes, well..." Delgan trailed off, glancing at Rarity's boltgun, "despite what I said earlier, I do have weapons available if you'd like them. An Astartes boltgun must be quite... unwieldy for something your size."

"It's heavy, of course, but levitation does much to help with that," Rarity agreed, "but if you'd like to accompany me to one of the restaurants in town for brunch, I would be happy to hear more about your inventory, and you can sample some of our fine pony cuisine!"

"That sounds delightful," Delgan said, inwardly wondering what a grass-eating species would consider "fine cuisine". "Just allow me to prepare a guard detail, and we can be on our way."

****

Ponyville - Horseshoe Café

"I do hope you'll find something that suits your taste. Obviously you won't find any meat on the menu, but humans eat fruits and vegetables too, correct?"

Delgan nodded absently as he scanned the menu, occasionally glancing around him at the café itself. They were seated outside, and his bodyguards had formed a loose perimeter of four men around the dining area while the townsfolk gawked at them.

Delgan was acutely aware that he looked ridiculous seated awkwardly on the small hay pile that the café used for seats, but he tolerated the indignity. He was already out on something resembling a date with a magical marshmallow-colored horse, after all.

The waitress pony was very slow in approaching their table. Not because she didn't want to attend the table, but rather because the moment she approached every one of the gunmen turned to stare at her.

"H-Hello. Can I take your order?" she asked. The question sounded curiously genuine, as if she really wasn't sure what to do.

"I'll have the daffodil salad with vinaigrette, please," Rarity said, levitating her menu shut.

"Of course. And you... Sir?" the waitress asked uncomfortably, turning toward the human.

"Fruit salad with a side of fried eggs," said Delgan, "and some hot tea. Jasmine. No sugar."

"And of course, I'll be taking the tab," Rarity added. The waitress murmured her thanks and gathered their menus, eager to be away from the attention of the bodyguards.

"Most generous of you, Miss Rarity," Delgan said with a smile.

"It is nothing. Classic Ponyville hospitality," the unicorn insisted with a grin, "besides, how would you pay? I can assure you that the café doesn't accept credits."

"I do hope I'm not burdening you, though. You never did mention what you do for a living," said the Trademaster, shifting the subject.

"Oh, I'm a fashion designer!" Rarity said brightly.

That gave the rogue merchant pause. "Is there much demand for that? Our waitress is the first pony I've seen wearing clothing, and it was nothing but a uniform vest."

"Most ponies don't wear clothes every day. They're expensive, and somewhat difficult to move in," Rarity explained, "you humans seem to find them very popular, though."

"Right. But I can't imagine that profession is very lucrative," Delgan mumbled. Considering Rarity's cutie mark and her mannerisms, he had guessed she was an heiress or jeweler. Dressmaker wasn't exactly a low-class profession, but he had no idea where it stood in a society that favored nudity.

"You'd be surprised," Rarity retorted as the waitress tepidly placed their tea on the table and then scurried away, "My customers usually order customized designs, and some even insist on having a new outfit to each special event they have planned. Such commissions can cost a pretty bit."

"I see. I suppose if clothes were classified as a rare luxury item in general, you could indeed make a fine living from them," Delgan mused as he poured him and Rarity some tea.

Rarity sighed wearily before levitating her tea cup next to her cheek and feeling the steam against her face. "Having to occasionally put my orders on hold to protect Equestria is awful for business, however. Completely necessary, obviously, but still difficult. I have quite a backlog from the past few days I spent exploring Ferrous Dominus."

"Oh? I hope I'm not exacerbating the problem," Delgan said before sipping gingerly from his teacup.

"Not at all," the unicorn assured him, "I'll have plenty of time to meet my deadlines. Assuming Twilight doesn't show up with some new mission to save the world."

They both chuckled at that.

Then they flinched as a flash of violet light flared next to their table.

Twilight noticed immediately as she teleported in that several humans were turning to brandish weapons at her, but she ignored them as she spotted Rarity.

"Rarity, I need your help! Serith stole the Elements of Harmony!"

Delgan winced as Rarity immediately slammed her face flat onto the table. The teacup dropped down next to her a moment later, bouncing to the side and spilling much of its contents onto the ground.

"I've little care for heroism. It has no respect at all for schedule," he muttered before he took a long sip of tea. Then he raised a hand. "Check, please."

Author's Note:

For anyone wondering why the Element of Honesty seemed to shortchange Rarity's murder spree during the Tau invasion: Applejack wasn't there, and Rarity wasn't especially eager to brag about it. I couldn't find a good way to shoehorn that exposition into the conversation, so I'm shoehorning it in now at the end.

I like the word "asinine".

Comments

[Coranth]

"Not at all," the unicorn assured him, "I'll have plenty of time to meet my deadlines. Assuming Twilight doesn't show up with some new mission to save the world."

"Rarity, I need your help! Serith stole the Elements of Harmony!"

Delgan winced as Rarity immediately slammed her face flat onto the table.

[Bast]

Poor rarity xD , time for more backlog orders lol

[gwojo]

why did mayor mare cry a little me no likey crying pony

[SFaccountant]

3940707
Mayor Mare is just a little too attached to her privacy.
Also, I suppose having her authority blatantly usurped by armed alien thugs also caused some emotional distress.
But she's a tough pony, she'll overcome!

[Shady Steps]

I ship Gaela and Twilight so hard.

[Dustino]

I think I may have to check out this whole Warhammer thing after I finish all of this.

Congratulations as well, impressive commitment to your story.
It's also destroyed my sleep schedule, good work!

[Mitch H]

Just as a note, you use "cascade" to describe a gaggle of colorful ponies in Ferrous Dominus. "Cavalcade" probably would work better in context, assuming you're not shy of horse-related terminology.

[SFaccountant]

6409048
I'm not sure what I was going for with "cascade", but your word works better. Thanks!

[Ragegamer243]

"You may keep the amulet, as I will not be returning your artifacts. Sincerely-"
"SEEEEEEEEERRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTH!!!"

Twilight vs. Serith

[Chillean]

Soooo, can we add SWEET BABY LUNA to canon list of pony swears? Puleeeeeeeez?

[DOOMRIDER]

Suddenly the floor shook underneath them, and Trixie found herself being hugged tightly by her assistant as the roar of a furious explosion reverberated through the hallway outside.
After a few seconds the shaking stopped, and they both listened fearfully for alarm klaxons.
"I'M OKAY!" shouted Serith from down the hall.

So I was over at my mom's house waiting for dinner to be made well reading this on my phone. I laughed so hard my grandmother became concerned and my mother thought I was dying... choking on something that I ate or Drank wrong.

[SFaccountant]

7379008
Do be careful. The Medicae General has issued warnings that exposure to Iron Hearts can cause shortness of breath and concern by those in the immediate surroundings.

[boronium]

"I'm sure you've noticed by now that I have confiscated the sorcerous artifacts that you thought to smuggle into Ferrous Dominus. Please understand that this seizure of your property is simply the enforcement of our security measures, and not in any way an act of specific harassment or retribution."

Huh... That must've taken some tactical geniu....CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED

[the other sans]

Ah got this star amulet from some sketchy guy wearin' incense burners with books ties to his back and stuff

1. Tied.

[the other sans]

7485458 Still here.

[RDDash]

First Celestia sends Sparkle on the fools errand.
Then Sparkle completely screws up even further by losing the artefact's.
Now Luna starts to annoy the person who doesn't even want to be on their planet

[Redwolf777sg]

"I realize that this may severely disadvantage you," Gaela continued, "so I have opted to gift you with a personally sanctioned substitute that you may use at will within the confines of our fortress. I realize that it may be inadequate, especially as I had only one amulet to offer despite confiscating several artifacts, but I'm sure you understand the limits of my position." Gaela paused to snort at that. "You may keep the amulet, as I will not be returning your artifacts. Sincerely-"

"SEEEEEEEEERRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTH!!!"

Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha! Serith is my favorite character because he knows how to get under Twilight's skin and I'm loving every minute of it.

[A Wild Magikarp]

"Sooooo..." began the man laying on the bunk above, leaning his head over the edge of the mattress. "... Was she, like, your girlfriend, or...?"

Yes. Yes she was. You cannot convince me otherwise. All the time spent together, the drinks, and the fretting over each other? I ship it like fedex.

"I'M OKAY!" shouted Serith from down the hall.

Only what you deserve.

[Animatorsnake]

Who doesn't like the word asinine?

Also, I know Luna is my fav princess but this chapter that Luna was in... she sounded like a complete idiot... though that has its charm to it I suppose

[Icy Creation]

"Yes. Much safer to stay in here, where we can see you and what you're doing at all times."

I hate him already.
Ian does too, he disaproves of the method degan has taken to ensure cooperation. Degan could just as easily made it clear what they were there for.

[FridayPie]

Is that resonance thing a HalfLife reference?

[Akira Dragonborne]

7269966

Epic Rap Battles of Equestria!

[N4rwh41]

"There's Trixie's monster!" the blue unicorn said, knocking a hoof against her head. "Where did you get Serith's armor? You so silly!"

Minor spoilers for later in.the series:

Hahahahahahahaha hahahahahah....... Even the dream sequences have foreshadowing XD