• Published 7th Mar 2012
  • 1,827 Views, 64 Comments

Pirates of Equestria - Lastingimage24



A battle between holy evil and blind truths takes place in the once utopian society that is Equestria. Six elements, two captains, and four Immortals struggle to clear the now blurred line between right and wrong.

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Familiar Faces

"Shit happens; things change."

Chapter 10

“Uh,” was all Rarity could utter at the shock of seeing her two friends simply standing in the middle of her home. Her mouth hung open for a few seconds before imagining what it looked like to the others. In fact, she must look absolutely dreadful to them at the moment. Though she’d never let herself go, she had gotten rather careless with her appearance in terms of grooming and style. She remembered that Spike said that he actually liked the natural look better. Usually she'd take that with a grain of salt, as most men just say that so they wouldn't hurt their partner's feelings, but she was dealing with a dragon here and he sounded very serious. She remembered that night, he couldn't keep his claws off her...

Ah, who cares what I look like! Rarity thought, throwing caution to the wind. "Oh my god, Spike, look! Fluttershy! Pinkie Pie!"

"Vex." the griffin chimed in, getting strange looks from everyone. Rarity paid no mind.

"What on earth are you two doing here?" she asked, raising a hoof to her chest and rearing her head. Glancing at the new griffin, she nervously corrected herself. “Er... three.”

"Nice to see you too, Rare," Fluttershy said smugly, flashing a smile full of indignant amusement. The gesture seemed out of character for her to Rarity. However, she paid it no mind as she waved her hoof frantically.

"I-I meant no insult, believe me! I just... I'm soo happy you're still breathing!" Rarity ran at a rather unladylike speed and style. She threw herself on Fluttershy, nuzzling her neck furiously. "I can't believe it! You came, you're actually here!"

Fluttershy wore the same awkward-yet-smug smile she had when Pinkie had done the same hug in Port Corral. She of course returned the sentiment, wrapping her foreleg around Rarity. That's when she noticed something... odd. Aside from her ungroomed fur and mane, Rarity's once smooth hugs were somehow... edgier. Her grip was tight and her legs were just that bit larger. As the hug drew out, Fluttershy found Rarity's entire body was curved differently, and the texture of her flawless skin was now rigid and coarse . It was all very strange for Fluttershy. Nevertheless, she continued her embrace with impunity.

After they finally let go, Fluttershy saw Rarity had started to cry much like Pinkie had. Quiet tears, absent of sobs, with a soft smile stretched along her face.

"Hugs?" Pinkie asked, stretching out her forehooves with a nervous smile and pleading eyes. Rarity laughed in spite of her tears.

"Of course Pinkie dear, I wouldn't have it any other way." Rarity squeezed Pinkie Pie tighter than she had Fluttershy, assuming she could handle it better than the delicate Fluttershy.

"Bleghh!" Pinkie exclaimed, having the wind squeezed out of her. Rarity retracted herself and apologized.

Rarity finally turned to the griffin. "And... Vex, was it? ...I suppose you want a hug as well?"

Vex immediately flushed at the thought, backing up and face becoming red. She waved her talons to keep the very good looking (in spite of disheveled appearances) white unicorn away. "N-naw, I don't need any, cave woman."

Rarity frowned at the name obviously meant to insult her, but Fluttershy spoke before she could backlash. "Rarity, what the hell spat you out? You look like you tried to fuck a boulder."

Vex repressed the urge to look at Spike and inform her that she may not be too far off.

Pinkie thought of Tom and blushed.

Spike... just stood there with an annoyed disposition.

Rarity was taken aback, utterly astonished at the vulgarity of the statement. "Fluttershy, why I'd never...! The profane nature of that statement... from you!"

Fluttershy, at first confused, lowered her ears and looked at Pinkie with an expression that just screamed 'whoops.' "Uh, sorry, Rare."

"Oh dear, I wasn't offended," Rarity assured, putting a tentative hoof on her shoulder. "I just didn't expect that from... you."

"I've changed," she warned, her expression changing back to that aggressive squint she constantly wore, sincere and humorless.

"Yeah," Pinkie confirmed, beaming. "Fluttershy's sexy now!"

Vex burst out with a loud chuckle, despite not knowing Fluttershy before her piracy. Rarity had a look of concern and uncertainty. The remark had also actually perturbed Spike, breaking his serous glare with a look of bemused shock. "She's kinda bad ass, I'll give her that," Vex added between immature giggles.

What brought Rarity's concern even further, was that Fluttershy shrank back with a bashful look of minute pride, like she was happy to be 'sexy' and 'bad ass', like she wasn't bothered by those words. She... liked the attention and compliments, Rarity noted with disgust. "Ladies!" she scolded.

Vex laughed even harder. "No ladies here. We got a cave woman, a drunk, a pirate, me, and Puff the Magic fucking Dragon." Vex stole a glance at the dragon, who became irritated at her, but not enough to act. All he did was bare his teeth and growl, which almost warrented another chortle from Vex. Weird, she had expected to be more anxious the first time she met a dragon, but here she was, beckoning him with insults. After a couple of seconds of brazen laughter from the pirate trio, they subsided as they saw Rarity gaping at them.

"Did you say... Pirate?" Rarity asked, frowning. Everyone's smile fell into a state of dumbfoundedness. Vex nervously breathed another chuckle as she rubbed the back of the feathers residing on her head.

"I let that slip a little too early," Vex stated, before looking at Fluttershy who now was absolutely pissed. "Didn't I?"

"Ya think?" Fluttershy deadpanned through disappointed indignation.

"Fluttershy?" Rarity asked slowly. "What's going on?" Rarity's judgmental gaze pierced Fluttershy's soul. Fluttershy kept her face straight in spite of this, ready to dismiss any of her friend's opinions of her occupation. Just because she won't approve won't stop her from doing what she loves, and she wouldn't care if she didn't understand the virtuous nature of her actions. In spite of her previous unmovable point of view on the situation, she sighed.

"Rarity... I'm a pirate, in case you haven't guessed." Rarity's accusing stare is what scared Fluttershy the most. "It was entirely my decision and... It isn't what you think, we don't do anything bad- well at least, not to people who don't deserve it."

"But you still rape and pillage." Rarity spoke flatly, disappointment seeping from her voice. She stated it as if it were indisputable fact. Her yellow friend tried to get angry, but all she could manage was stern irritation.

"No, we don't! At least... we don't rape, dear god we don't rape. In fact, rape was one of the reasons I joined the pirates; that horrible experience is what tore the line... I didn't want anyone else to go through what I did."

Pinkie Pie tried to gasp, but her throat was shut; she had no idea that Fluttershy had been.... Vex looked off to the side, away from her yellow friend in sympathy, to spare her the shame of a stare. She had heard the story long ago. Spike's blank expression somehow told his anger for whoever had done an act so horrid to the kind and meek Fluttershy. Rarity stood on her ideal, however.

"All the same, Fluttershy. I'm sorry for what happened, but that doesn't give you the right to take from others."

Spike was actually surprised at Rarity's cold argument. He widened his eyes and looked at her in bewilderment. "Rarity..." he said, his voice laden with sadness. Rarity closed her eyes in a huff and turned away from her dragon.

"No, Spike! It is unfortunate, and I'd rip the head off whoever did it, but it is no excuse to break the law so casually like that! I'm sorry Fluttershy, I love you but... that isn't something I approve of and that's that..."

Fluttershy sighed, more sad than irritated. But she didn't let go of her stand. "You're right, it isn't an excuse... But you don't understand the position I'm in. It was the Princesses' Legion! They're the ones that did that to me! They burned my home, my animals! I may be breaking the law, sure, but it's the price of fighting evil! C'mon, you remember ponyville, the old times, you're no stranger to that. It's the same thing as fighting Nightmare Moon, or Chrysalis, or King Assface, but just on a grander scale!"

Rarity avoided everyone's gaze and looked at the ground, cracks in her argument forming, however, she remained steadfast in her altercation. "I doubt the entire military is to blame for the act of only a few ponies... it still isn't right. You take from them. It's selfish."

Fluttershy smiled in the face of her debate this time, happy with her counter argument. Almost cocky, she spoke. "That's just it, they ARE responsible. You know what our crew consists of? People, pony or otherwise that got fucked over in different ways by the Legion. Our Captain's house was burned by them by order of a General he was good friends with. With his wife still inside. Klepto, a griffin, his entire family was murdered by them as collateral because he couldn't pay his taxes. Penny, a unicorn, she was brutally raped by an entire squadren of men in broad daylight and no one did a damned thing..."

Fluttershy continued to rant off the many ways the Legion practically held society by the balls, and how she had made it her mission to stop their ways, however ambitious it was. It fell on attentive and sensitive ears.

"Okay..." Rarity began as her friend finished. "I still... I don't know..."

"Look, Rare, it's not like we're bludgeoning every legionnaire we see and dumping his body in a ditch, we're conservative with anything fatal, and we treat dead with respect despite how much of an asshole they were." Fluttershy gave off another sigh and smiled with pleading eyes. "I may have changed, but my values are very much the same, okay?" It was her turn to put a hoof on the white unicorn's shoulder. "I'm just... stronger."

Rarity had tried her hardest not to smile, to not be moved by her friend's actions, but it snuck up on her, and her face cracked, just barely. She still wasn't certain of the pegasus' new lifestyle, but she trusted Fluttershy.

"What are you doing here?" Rarity asked again, this time as humble inquiry rather than shocked disbelief.

Fluttershy smiled confidently and gave a fierce nod before putting her other hoof on her friend's shoulders. "We need you Rare. Something big's going down and we need the elements to find out what and put a stop to it."

"I'm not going to be like you. I have no desire to be a pirate," she warned as matter of fact. Fluttershy grabbed Pinkie in a headlock, unaffected by the white mare's statement.

"It's okay, neither is Pinkie," she said, rubbing Pinkie's skull with her hoof roughly. "Aren't ya, Pinkie?"

Pinkie began giggling uncontrollably as a result of the proceeding noogie, and a little flustered at the contact of her oblivious friend. "Yes I am!"

Rarity couldn't help but smile at the sight of her two long lost friends get along so well despite their massive differences. Maybe she could be like that too, now that she has the chance again. "What does this help entail?"

"I don't even know," Fluttershy said, honestly, letting go of a now disappointed Pinkie Pie. "What we do know, is very little. We were hoping to figure it out along the way."

"Hmm..." Lost in thought, Rarity turned to Spike who had been remarkably quiet, save for a few dissatisfied looks at Rarity during her and Fluttershy's little debate. Rarity smiled meekly. "Up for a little adventure? We don't have to go if you don't want to."

"Honestly, I'd rather stay." Everyone in the room including Rarity had small looks of incredulous disbelief, but changed as Spike followed up. "But if it's really that important, how could I say no? Besides..." Spike trailed his claw around her mane, getting her hair out of her face, and stared in her eyes. Straight faced, as if it were the most important thing in the world, he finished with, "I'm the one that follows you." Rarity's eyes were half masted as she smiled, obviously wooed by Spike's simple sentiment. Fluttershy and Vex felt a little uncomfortable; they thought the two were about to start spontaneously going at it the way they were looking at each other. Vex cleared her throat anxiously.

Rarity got off the implications gracefully by fully ignoring the transpired events and referring to her guests. "Then it's settled," she said. "We'll come along as long as you tell us everything."

"Well we should get back to the ship before dark; we'll tell you on the way."


“A disembodied head?” Rarity recoiled in utter disgust, sticking her tongue out and wincing.

“I know, right?” Fluttershy replied, sharing a similar look.

The past half hour had been spent strolling down the mountain and getting Spike and Rarity up to speed. Pinkie had spent those thirty minutes just staring at Rarity, admiring her obvious physical improvements. Her shoulders were massive and the cuts of her muscles flexed with every step. It was strangely alluring and somehow made Rarity look even better than she used to. Stranger still, was that her messy mane actually complimented her muscles and made her look like a goddess. Pinkie had to refrain from drooling.

The group had discussed the strange parchment and its explosive tendencies with glowing lettering and promises of apocalypses, they introduced Vex who had been incredibly rude and insensitive the entire way down (Rarity quickly grew to despise her company), and talked about their Captain and how awesome he is. Pinkie Pie and even Vex talked up to him, so Rarity slowly became eager to meet his acquaintance. As their conversation finished, Fluttershy sought to strike up a new topic.

“So how about you two? Living in cave doesn’t exactly sound appealing to the prim and proper Rarity.”

Instantly, the two’s disposition changed to anxious reluctance, as they tried to dodge the question physically by turning their heads and staring blankly into the sky. Needless to say, it was futile, they felt the puzzled stares of their friends... and Vex.

“Uhh,” Rarity started awkwardly. “Stuff... happened.”

Vex scoffed as she pointed out, “That was about as vague as Pinkie’s sexuality.”

Pinkie made some noise that involved some sort of choking whinnie. She nervously shifted her eyes as she noted that everyone luckily ignored her.

“Well... I... We just needed some time alone, you know? People aren’t exactly approving of a dragon-pony relationship.”

“Relationship?” Pinkie asked, puzzled. “You mean you two are...?”

Rarity raised a brow. “You mean you seriously didn’t notice? I was wondering why you hadn’t commented.”

“So,” Pinkie continued, her voice and tone of shock escalating with each word. “You two... you know... did stuff?!”

Fluttershy answered for her friend this time, equally bewildered by Pinkie’s obliviousness. “Pinkie, they were living in a cave when we met them, what do you think they did all that time, play bridge?” Rarity’s blush started to burn through her white coat, and she even became light headed. It’s true, there never was never much to do other than... Spike. But it’s not like they just constantly had intercourse, they would occasionally go for walks in the forest along a lake Spike now called his, they would work on the aesthetics of the cave and go gem hunting, they would build their...

“Dungeon!” Rarity blurted out suddenly, causing everyone to stop and stare at her. As her heart race slowed, she flushed even harder. “Spike and I would build a dungeon, you know, mazes in the cave, booby traps, all that good stuff. For uh... for... fun.” Great. This might do more harm than good, Rarity noted as Spike gave her a look that plead for death. Everyone’s gaze grew even more puzzled.

“A... Dungeon?”

“Just... for kicks?”

“Yeah,” Rarity tried to finish, her voice wavering and unsure. “I mean... Spike’s a dragon... I’m a pony... I’m ‘his’... he protects what’s his... he has treasure... it seemed... cliche... and funny... and uh... ironic, I guess.”

“Uh...” Pinkie’s voice rose up after an awkward silence. “Congratulations?”

Spike almost knocked himself out with a facepalm of that magnitude. Even he started to blush, his blood piercing his purple scales. “Look, can we talk about something else,” he offered, rubbing the spines on the back of his head.

“Hey,” Pinkie sang instantly, jumping on the chance to ask. “Where did you get the wings, you look great!”

Spike was now a red dragon. It didn’t look good on him. “U...e...Ueh... ah... I... don’t...?”

Rarity, also now becoming a red pony, tried to save him. “Spike... doesn’t like... telling that... story?” If that excuse sounded sincere, her friends may have let the interrogation go. However, she phrased it as a question, and the integrity of her justification shattered like a wine glass. “Look,” she plead, sounding a lot like her mate. “How about this, either of you tell me or Spike part of your story, and he’ll tell you how he got his wings in excruciating detail.” Spike gave Rarity a look that begged her to think of something else, but she just responded in a wink. That’ll teach them. Spike knew what Rarity was planning and he did not like it. Not a bit. Still... it would be funny.

The carnivorous beasts that were Rarity’s friends seemed satisfied with the trade, quickly trying to think of a story of their pasts that would satisfy the two. Rarity quickly added, “And it has to be meaningful! If I don’t cry or am severely disappointed in you Spike won’t say how he got his wings. Alright?”

Everyone murmured in reluctant agreement before sifting through the memories for an ample parable. Rarity and her dragon sighed.

As the distance between them and their beloved home town closed, the tension increased. Fluttershy had found it a bit weird that going back to the town hadn't yielded any particularly strong emotions other than nostalgia when they had first entered Ponyville, but now with Rarity and Spike walking along beside them, it felt different. Almost... wrong, somehow. Furthermore, Rarity's boutique was in Ponyville, just adding to memories of a time that would never again be the same. If Fluttershy had to see her cottage again... she doesn't think she'd be able to handle it. No doubt she'd throw up or go into fits of rage and depression. She would be put on the edge, and most likely get thrown off. And Spike? The library? I have no idea how the older, mature Spike would react. God I feel sorry for the guy.

Spike, sensing the feelings of foreboding anxiety, moved closer to Rarity and climbed on her back, wrapping his arm around her neck and allowing the other to hang in front of her. He positioned his head to be right next to her muzzle, a perfect place to listen to her soft breathing. He was just the right size to rest his hind paws on her haunches as his tail hung off her flank and dragged across the ground. His wings, even folded, was double the width of his partner. There he was, Rarity's guardian. It seemed to be his way of saying, 'although I live serve her, she's mine, and you won't touch her'. Fluttershy had turned to check up on the two, and couldn't believe her eyes. Rarity seemed completely unbothered, and even seemed more at ease with him there. She thought Pinkie was strong for being able to carry Vex fairly easily, Rarity wasn't even phased; she walked with the same saunter and acted as if absolutely nothing was on her back. Still gawking, Fluttershy asked, "Do you guys regularly do that?"

At first, Rarity and her partner looked questioningly at the yellow mare, both cocking their heads in unison. Rarity then bore a smile as she realized what her friend was referring to. "Oh, heh. Sorry, it's usually how we walk around I had forgotten it might be a tinge odd of a sight. Yes, we do. Don't worry, I can handle it."

"I can see that," she responded, giving another grin in return.

Pinkie snorted uncontrollably a couple of times, hitting the Pegasus in the shoulder. "Hehe, he's riding her." Fluttershy scoffed in irritation as she rolled her eyes, stopping when they hit the sky. She noticed for the first time that the sun had begun to set, dusk settling in place of the prior daylight. Now Fluttershy wanted to get through Ponyville even faster. Traveling by rivers and canals at night was very uncomfortable for the Pegasus. Especially now since they had that Legion ship trailing them. The more time they spent in ponyville, the more the young captain caught up. They were lucky they had confronted the legion in the large lake next to Canterlot, and next time they might not be so lucky.


The exhale that escaped Spike's nostrils rung across the barely lit streets, giving his friends a shudder on the outside, but warming their lungs on the inside. The same feeling one gets when they have a fever and are wrapped in a blanket, a feeling of dread and content, nostalgia and unease. No one could tell what the dragon was thinking, but the wistful sigh was more than enough a hint. The library sat before them, somehow being more menacing a sight than Celestia herself. Spike had been staring for the past twelve minutes, and everyone had remained silent out of respect for the purple dragon, and even more so to the purple unicorn that had disappeared so suddenly all those years ago. As the time elapsed became noticeable, Fluttershy craned her neck to look at Spike still on Rarity's back. "You know," she said. "We know where she is..."

Spike was quiet once more, at first showing no sign of acknowledgement. However, he then spoke, quietly and hoarsely. "Then we'll find her."

"Spike... she might be-"

"We'll find her." His voice final, and driven, Fluttershy shut up and turned back towards the library.

Maybe we will.

"Hey!"

Wait, woah, who's ruining our moment? Fluttershy thought in aggravation, facing the offender behind them. Spike had a look of absolute rage and disdain, taking the interruption as a personal insult. Rarity whispered some calming words to him, preventing a growl and softening his expression a small bit. before them stood six ponies: three earth ponies two unicorns and a pegasus, varying in color and size. There was only one woman there, and she had the most malicious scowl of all. All six wore red legion coats, the front earth pony sporting a couple of medals and a badge indicating his rank, some variation of a Sergeant. The leading pony bore a smile, an unsettling one.

"Well, well, well, wan't Ai right. Thrasher owes meh faive bits; y'are that yeller pirate wanted by all the Legion. Yah earned quite a name for yourself, pissed off the princess, ye did." His accent was as hard to understand as it was annoying for the pirates and friends. It was indiscernible, some bastardisation of an irish dialect. Fluttershy came to the conclusion it was forced, some odd attempt to feign whimsy and wisdom. Idiot. Out of nowhere, Rarity stepped forward, dragon in tow.

"I'm sure this is just a misunderstanding, sir. If you would allow, I'd like to discuss our situation here." Rarity was trying the diplomatic method, much to Fluttershy's chagrin.

"Heh, 'discuss.'" He scoffed at the notion. "Ai dun think a 'discussion ' is in order. As Ai see it 'ere, ye got another two pirates in ye party along with the big yeller one being the meat of the bounty."

"Big?" Fluttershy asked in irritated horror.

"Y'see in the Legion, tain't no pay difference 'tween dead'r'alive. And a body bag is just so easy t'store." He laughed, with the others backing it up with small chuckles.

Rarity, appalled, began to berate the Legionaries in her mind, but attempted to maintain a cool exterior. “Surely you can’t be serious. If only-”

“Look, lady,” he interrupted, losing his patience. “Ai know ye be trying to be all polite’n’stuff, going the diplo-macee route, but these guys already got the death sentence and Ai get to carry it out. Don’t be thinkin’ we gon’ stop just because ye got a wee pet dragon on ye back tryin’ t’intimidate us, makin’ all those faces.”

Rarity turned to see Spike’s face constricting in wrath and anger, obviously trying to keep it to himself. She noticed his claws were digging as hard as they could into her chest without bringing injury. Done with her little check up she looked at the six ponies again, this time with incredulous apathy on her face.

“Also, bein’ an accessory to a fugitive of this magnitude is automatic death. But that don’t mean we can’t have a little fun first, eh?” The lead pony’s smile became absolutely wicked, reaching easily from ear to ear. Rarity noted with complete disgust that even the mare of the group lit up at the opportunity, naughty ideas already forming in her head. Atrocious.

“Well,” Rarity said, flabbergasted. A yellow hoof was put up to Rarity’s chest, attempting to prevent any involuntary action from the mare, and maybe even trying to protect her in the process. While stepping forward, Fluttershy frowned.

“Don’t worry Rare, we got these fuckwads,” she assured, drawing her sword. A fierce Vex got on her hind legs and positioned one of her talons near her face and the other near her stomach and formed fists with them, this being her preferred fighting stance, Although strange, it usually proved to be quite effective. Pinkie cowered behind Fluttershy, but still wore a determined and rather pissed expression.

Strangely, Rarity pretended as if her friend wasn’t there, and pushed her aside like a bookshelf. She took a whopping four steps forward, effectively isolating herself from the rest of the group. Ignoring the baffled expressions her friends’ (and Vex’s) now bore, Rarity assured them that she would handle it. “So,” she said, directing it at the opposing Legion ponies. “You want to have a little fun, huh?” Rarity rolled her shoulders and craned her neck once in both directions, each snapping at its threshold with an audible crack. “I guess I could provide a supply.” She smiled as a finish to her threats, then gave a tout curtsey and reaching a hoof forward having it arc downwards at the wrist. “Would you be a gentleman and offer me this dance?”

These actions didn’t help to break the pirates out of their dumbfounded state. Jaws were hitting the floor. Even more puzzling, Spike wasn’t reacting at all, despite his protective disposition throughout their meeting at the cave.

The Sergeant smiled and decided to humor the white unicorn, and maybe try to humiliate her in the process. “Of course, m’lady,” he spewed sarcastically, his voice oozing sickeningly from the back of his throat. He stepped forward and placed his hoof on Rarity’s. That’s when all hell broke loose.

It didn’t even look like his hoof had made contact with hers before he was jerked forward at incredible speeds, now chest to chest in a split second. His face was now twisted with distilled horror as Rarity’s smiling muzzle closed in on his. Her eye’s were locked into his, her mind obviously filling with thoughts of hatred and pity. It looked like a move in the waltz, with Rarity leading. Both of their forelegs were outstretched in front of him. Like lightning, Rarity wrapped the same foreleg around his, leaving space at the knee, taking her other foreleg and propping it up against it. Her shoulder now rested on his chest, and provided leverage as she suddenly pulled with all her might. The bone gave way with almost no resistance.

As he screamed in distress, Spike hopped off of Rarity and stood his ground as two more earth ponies, running parallel to each other and Spike, charged with their swords in their mouths, the blades in opposite directions. Effortlessly, Spike grabbed both bases of the blades, closest to the hilt where the least amount of kinetic energy and momentum was, and slammed their heads together. Of course not being that damaging of a blow, Spike took advantage of their recovery time and dragged his hind claws from their legs down to their hooves. Their winces of pain caused them to let go of their weapons and forfeit them to Spike. The sudden disappearance of stability from the blades caused Spike to fall gracefully on his back. He then transitioned all his weight there, rearing his legs and coiling his body as much as he could. He flung forward, making his hind legs crash into the chests of the two ponies, the blow breaking some ribs and incapacitating them.

Leaving a sobbing Sergeant behind, Rarity prepared to defend herself from the approaching pegasus sailing on the wind, the mare of the group. Her face laden with confidence and angry determination, she sped like a bullet towards Rarity. At the last second, however, she curved sharply upwards into the sky, right before Rarity’s eyes. She knew instantly what the mare was planning. Keeping her eyes in the sky she waited patiently for the incoming attack.

Spike sped towards the unicorn holding the flintlock, his wings spreading as he glided a few inches above the ground. Not expecting the sudden burst of speed, the gun discharged, the unicorn hoping to hit him in midst flight. Spike simply twirled in the air, unphased as the ball passed his torso, leaving him unscathed. He tackled the unicorn, rolled on the ground with him in his arms, and tossed him like a doll as he gained back his footing.

A dot got larger, more quickly, as the pegasus reached the ground at massive speeds in a vertical plummet towards earth. Rarity remained still as she squinted and concentrated on the mare. Closer, closer, closer. Rarity spotted a shimmer of the blade. Close enough. As if in slow motion, Rarity caught the blade by the blunt side mid-flight and spun it while it still occupied the Legion mare’s mouth. Her eye’s widened in horror as the blade completely missed the locked-on target and embedded itself into the ground. Fliifthgh was the sound it made as the dirt met the hilt of the sword. Luckily for the mare, she wasn’t going fast enough to injure herself from the sudden stop. However, an acrobatic white unicorn spun gracefully on her left foreleg, and roundhouse-bucked the vulnerable pegasus with the weight of her entire body, her hind leg making contact with the back of the pegasus’ head. This made the mare lose consciousness immediately as she was sent flying across the pavement a couple of yards before landing and tumbling across the floor and coming to a complete stop.

The two had finished their fight, Spike and Rarity. They dusted off their claws and hooves, before facing the final Legion member. A bright green unicorn, face filled with awe and dismay, jaw wide open, and visibly paling. Spike had walked up to Rarity once again, and their stares at the unicorn was apparent and smug. Spike was actually smiling for the first time since meeting his old friends. They quickly glanced at each other, and gave a final look to the unicorn as they both leaned forward.

“Boo,” they spouted in unison.

The unicorn screamed bloody murder as he ran off, crying. After a couple of seconds, the pair began to laugh hysterically as they held each other. “Ahahaha! You see that guy? Classic!” Spike yelled in out of character glee.

“Ho, it’s been awhile since our last fight. Nice to see we still got it!”

The duo laughed for a bit more before noting that their friends’ expressions had remained unchanged. Shock, awe, and their jaws on the ground.

“What?” Rarity asked, raising an eyebrow.

“You...” Vex breathed, raising a talon and pointing towards the scene. “You beat the shit out of them...”

“All six of them.” Fluttershy’s head drooped with her mouth still open. “In like, ten seconds flat.”

There was a slump sound behind the party; the sound of Pinkie Pie fainting and hitting her head on a rock the way down.

“I guess we did, didn’t we?” Spike said bashfully, looking the other way, his usual demeanor returning.

“Just a second, guys.” Rarity walked up to Fluttershy. “I still don’t agree with your proposal that all Legion behave this way,” she said firmly. “But... these guys were huge...” She tried to search for the right word.

“Dicks?” Vex finished, he voice incredulous.

“That’s the word,” Rarity cheerfully agreed. Her expression straightened. She trotted next to the ear of the crying pony with a broken leg on the ground. He wasn't completely pathetic, the tears weren’t from crying necessarily, but were involuntary, being caused by the pain. Rarity grabbed his purple mane and shoved her muzzle next to his ear. She spoke quietly making her self very clear. “We had fun, didn’t we? You finished a bit too early though, and I have to say, I’m a little disappointed.”

The stallions eyes were wide and his pupils were dilated from the adrenaline of the pain. He was absolutely frightened. Rarity gently put a hoof on his broken leg to drive the point home. He winced in pain. “Now you listen here: if you ever do this again, it doesn’t matter where you are or how you do it, I will find out about it, and find you, and rip off what makes you a man. I may be Lil Miss Rarity, but I promise I can be your worst nightmare if you get on my bad side. I won’t stand for people like you. Neither will my friends. So remember this: next time you think about doing something atrocious for your own personal gain, remember me. Because if you don’t, you won’t have any limbs to get broken, understand?”

The stallion choked a bit before letting out a raspy, “Mhmm!”

“Good.” She let go of his mane and faced her friends once again. She chuckled nervously. “I guess I owe you an explanation.”

“Gee, ya think?”


Author's Note:

HOLYSHITWTFBBQ FUKIN' 3 UPDATES IN A MONTH HOLY SHIT WHAT UNIVERSE ARE WE IN DID THE WORLD EXPLODE WHAT STEROIDS AM I TAKING?!?!?!?!?

Yeah, I know.

And 50,000 words, holy shit.

AND CHAPTER 10 OMG! I never thought I'd get this far, at least, not this quickly! When I first planned this story, it was originally meant to be just a silly short random adventure. Pinkie, Fluttershy, and Zecora were going to be the only main characters (This story was inspired by She's A Pony by Glaze btw, but that song no longer applies to the fic :P)! Then I spawned the idea of having this be dramatic and realistic also, with a fluctuating theme of morality, and this baby was produced. Awesome, just awesome. Feel free to ask me anything about the canon in the comments, this chapter just introduced a bunch of stuff, and I won't be spoilery I promise!

P.S. Zecora got demoted to extra lol.