Part 3: Chapter 1 The Hair Puller

Continuing on my series about how I’ve been writing Equestria’s Changeling Princesses and the Kinsbane, here is what happened with Chapter 1.

Previous posts here:
Background
Prologue

I hate writing beginnings. The only beginning that really worked out for me was Princess Celestia: The Changeling Queen and Equestria’s Changeling Queen and the Abyssal Empress. All other beginnings I write in original fiction or otherwise are hair pulling nightmares.

Equestria’s Changeling Princesses had a beginning that was no exception to the rule. I had several rewrites of it because there was so much to do.

First off, I wanted to get the girls off to the past, and so the portal had to happen.

But I also had to update the audience on what happened to our favorite characters…what happened with Tethys, what happened between those years.

Which meant… Chrysalis, Simulacris, Belladonna and of course Alternia and her husband Harlequin all needed screen time. And I wanted to jam in Lamia, Blueblood and—-

You get the point, I had my work cut out for me, which led to a fairly packed first chapter with a lot of things happening.

But that wasn’t even the hardest part. I had to rewrite the malfunction to the portal several times, not for spoilery reasons, but for “okay but why did it just yank the two sisters in” reasons. One scene had everybody being sucked in but managing to hold on… which didn’t make sense because then...why wasn’t a baby changeling sucked in? Or why didn’t they just evacuate the room—basic logic stuff like that.

Then there was Mirage’s PTSD, which I hope is being well-portrayed… The fact of the matter was, I didn’t want to give her PTSD. I wanted to show that she was burning out, that she needed to let herself have a damn break and essentially realize she was working herself to death trying to fulfil expectations that were never truly placed on her.

Of course, pre-reader extraordinaire, excellent author, and former military man Wanderer D went and just told me,” she has PTSD man (not a direct quote).

Aaand so that made me have to rewrite it and introduce the fact she had PTSD and what variety and — you get the point. 

I did enjoy Chapter 1 a lot though, it got me to introduce a grown up Kyria and Mirage. That scene where the two sisters were talking in the airship cruiser was the first I wrote and while it’s not my favorite, I do like how I introduced them.

Sincerely,
vren55

Comments

[Wanderer D]

"Military". If you really want to have a veteran Jake is probably a better choice to give that respect to. XD

[vren55]

5194991
True, but he wasn't pre-reading for me lol!