Read It Now Reviews #115 – Free to Study, Making Up is Hard to Do, In Everything but Name, Memorial, One Last Snap · 3:01am Oct 16th, 2019
I was going to write a blog post about the finale, but having gotten about halfway through it, I’m not really sure what it was going to add to the discussion – to a great extent, it felt like a rehash of the episode, rather than adding anything of value.
But I do have things I want to say about it, so I will have to reformulate my thoughts.
In the meanwhile, I actually started reading stories again. And, well, as long as I was reminiscing… what about another review set?
Today’s stories:
Free to Study by Wanderer D
Making Up is Hard to Do by Lofty Withers
In Everything but Name by Monochromatic
Memorial by NinjaDeadBeard
One Last Snap by Somber
Free to Study
by Wanderer D
Romance, Comedy
3,504 wordsNow that she's no longer the Principal of the School of Friendship, Gallus has nothing to stop him from asking Twilight out on a date except his own nervousness. Will she accept? Probably not. But how can Gallus move on if he never acknowledges his feelings?
Why I added it: I blame Present Perfect. Also, Wanderer D is a good writer.
Review
With Twilight moving on from being the principal of the School of Friendship to the ruler of all Equestria, now is clearly the perfect time for Gallus to act on his crush and ask her out.
I mean, she’s definitely going to say no, right?
She wouldn’t say yes, right?
Well, this is going to be awkward.
This story is one of those sort of cutesy shipfics where a character asks another out and they have an awkward date. Of course, this being Gallus and Twilight, them having an awkward date is 100% believable, though Twilight dating one of her former students is… a little weird. Okay, a lot weird.
Seriously guys, aren’t there laws against this?
Well, whatever.
The relationship here is pretty shallow, but deliberately so – Twilight’s attraction to Gallus in particular seems to be heavily grounded in his handsome, though there’s a bit of appreciation for their personalities as well. As a result, most of the humor is fairly surface-level, rather than based on anything deeper, though that’s not necessarily a bad thing for a comedy.
There’s definitely a market for stories like this, and I laughed a few times, but this isn’t really the sort of shipfic that I tend to prefer, and while the jokes were okay, the fact that Twilight is dating one of her former students feels a bit weird, and I guess in the end, the jokes (which were funny) and trolling Present Perfect weren’t quite enough to make me enthusiastic about it.
Recommendation: Not Recommended.
Making Up is Hard to Do
by Lofty Withers
Sex, Comedy
1,487 wordsFluttershy asks for an apology, but it’s not really what she wants.
Why I added it: Lofty Withers is a good writer.
Review
While this is the first story by Lofty Withers I’ve formally reviewed, I actually started following them because of the Feghoot contest – [url= https://www.fimfiction.net/story/441323/mummy-issues]Mummy Issues amused me, and I should write a proper review of it at some point. They have a sense of humor which is good at surprising me in all the right ways, as well as a proper appreciation of terrible puns.
Rarity and Twilight are fighting, and poor Fluttershy is caught in between them. She is serving as a messenger of sorts, in one of those “Tell Twilight” or “Tell Rarity” sort of ways, except they’re in the same room.
You know, a very awkward situation between friends. Or lovers, as the case may be.
While this is a basic setup, the story has several jokes that made me giggle, and then as you head towards the end, you realize that there’s a whole additional layer to this piece that makes it even funnier. These sorts of hidden information jokes can be quite powerful, and the punchline to this story made me laugh out loud. Not every joke landed for me, but the story was short enough, and the punchline good enough, that I can’t help but give it a thumbs up.
Note that is a story which uses a fair bit of saucy humor, so if that isn’t your thing, this isn’t really likely to be up your alley, but if saucy humor amuses me, this is pretty great.
Recommendation: Worth Reading if innuendo amuses you.
In Everything But Name
by Monochromatic
Romance, Slice of Life
10,554 wordsA relationship is not always so easy to define, especially when the ponies involved are drawn in different directions. Yet it turns out that sometimes the answer to your problems really do lie in books. Even if you have to write them yourself.
Faced with the implications and changes brought about by Twilight's coronation, Rarity must contend with what it might mean for their relationship. A relationship, you see, that lives and dies by the dozens of books quietly stashed away in the back of her closet.
One day, she hopes, she'll be able to give them back.
Why I added it: I knew Monochromatic had to write this after the finale didn’t make Rarity and Twilight kiss.
Review
Rarity and Twilight have a secret relationship. But they don’t want to say that out loud. They don’t have time for a relationship. They’re not friends with benefits. They love each other. But they don’t have the time to date. Or at least, that’s their excuse. No, they’re simply “Us”.
Until, of course, Twilight takes over Equestria, and “Us” becomes much more long distance, and what had previously seemed like a perfectly sensible romantic relationship is now making them feel lonely indeed.
I liked this story. The way that Rarity keeps hurting herself, and at times, Twilight, the way that Twilight unintentionally wounds Rarity with her distance and station – this sort of agony makes for delicious romantic drama. Which of course is sweetened by their odd show of affection for each other, with Twilight trying to “educate” Rarity with books, books that mean so much more than their contents, books whose continued acceptance signifies that Rarity is okay with waiting and will be back for another the next time they curl up together.
The mixture of love and pain, the way that their relationship waxes and wanes, and with it, the emotional state of the characters, combined with Rarity’s attempts at coping and Twilight’s kind (but slightly snarky) nature and attempt at being understanding even when it hurts all works really well together. The mixture of emotions makes the audience want them to break it off, because it hurts so bad, but at the same time, makes the audience want them to overcome their problems and actually be more than “us”, and actually have a proper relationship.
Recommendation: Worth Reading
Memorial
by NinjaDeadBeard
Dark, Drama, Sad
4,544 wordsIn time, all of Twilight Sparkle's friends have had to say their last goodbyes. And as the last of the original Cutie Mark Crusaders passes on, the Princess decides to send her off in grand fashion.
But after the party, the tears, and her newer friends have moved on, and Twilight is all alone once again, somecreature she once thought of as a friend decides to visit her for tea.
Memorial, or Desecration? Twilight might just have to decide tonight, on the loneliest night of her life...
Why I added it: It was featured.
Review
Ninjadeadbeard is a name I’d never seen before. In fact, their first story was published just this August. So I had no idea what I was signing up for when I went to read this story, but the long description intrigued me.
Apple Bloom is dead, and the ponies who knew her have all gathered to pay their respects. Even some ponies who didn’t know her as well are there… most likely more for Twilight than anyone, as with Apple Bloom’s passing, the last pony who she met when she first moved to Ponyville is dead and gone. And while Twilight has other friends – connections with other ponies – as well as her immortal friends, and her eternal companion, Spike, there’s still a certain feeling of loss after the deaths of so many ponies she once knew. But as we go through the list, it seems like something is missing…
This is a story that is hard to talk about because it is so full of twists and turns, and part of the fun of the story is being along for that ride. I got the voices of the characters in my head at several points, which is always a good thing – and doubly so given that they are used for disquieting effect at times, as we come to understand the titular memorial and what it means to the ponies involved.
At the start of this story, it seemed only passable; the first scene was very much about setting the stage for the rest of the story, but consequently, while it has a lot to say in terms of setting, it is almost entirely worldbuilding. However, once you get past that point, you start to get into the emotional meat of the story and you start getting a real payoff. The story also had a few typos here and there, but the odd bit of rough writing can be overlooked for the story’s central piece.
I don’t really approve of the characters’ actions, but at the same time, they’re intriguing, and the story was an interesting read.
Overall, I felt like the core idea here carried it well through its twists and turns, and it was a lot happier than might be expected from the tags, with a line or two that made me smile, but there’s a little bit of disquiet lurking underneath, as we’re left with the question of what exactly we just witnessed.
Recommendation: Worth Reading.
One Last Snap
by Somber
Sad
3,178 wordsDiscord says goodbye.
Why I added it: Somber is a good writer.
Review
Fluttershy is old and going senile. Her eyesight is fading. She is having trouble remembering things.
And Discord? Discord is the same as he ever was. Better, really. He loves Fluttershy, he has grown into a better person…
And yet, Fluttershy is dying. Aging is stupid. If only he could solve it all with a snap.
But he can’t.
But if he can’t help Fluttershy, what can he do in her waning days? And how will he deal with it when she’s gone, if he can’t even deal with it now?
I’m of two minds about this story.
One mind says that I like it. The story has a natural shape to it – Discord is upset that he can’t solve Fluttershy’s problem, that Fluttershy is getting old and going to die, and so the story flows from there, with Discord’s emotional state resulting in him getting, if not what he wants, then the best he can get when he accepts that he can’t get what he really wants.
Another part of me, however, suggests that rather than being romantic (in the sense of “of, characterized by, or suggestive of an idealized view of reality.”), the actual resolution to this story is horrifying and tragic, and rather than grow as a person and get over it, his stubborn refusal to move on is actually pretty awful, and the fact that other people enable and approve of it is… just really (morally) wrong, and I don’t know if I believe that Spike or Twilight would be willing to go along with it so readily.
Recommendation: Worth Reading
Summary
Free to Study by Wanderer D
Not Recommended
Making Up is Hard to Do by Lofty Withers
Worth Reading
In Everything but Name by Monochromatic
Worth Reading
Memorial by NinjaDeadBeard
Worth Reading
One Last Snap by Somber
Worth Reading
Yes, I realize that Wanderer D’s story would properly be in a read it later set. Shhhhh.
Number of stories still listed as Read It Sooner: 237
Number of stories still listed as Read It Later: 678
Number of stories listed as Read It Eventually: 2294
If I may, I did have a reason for having Discord do what he did, and the reason is that he specifically didn't want to 'get over it' was precisely that he would get over it. Fluttershy and friendship was a fluke. In centuries, he happened to stumble upon this one person that he could love and who could love him and they were going to die. And unlike Twilight, Discord can snap his fingers to get what he wants. Without Fluttershy in his life, the good Discord would fade away. Oh, not right away, but eventually... inevitably... he would either succumb to grief and fade away to oblivion, or he would revert to being a jerk again.
Twilight was willing to turn Rockhoof to stone simply because he felt out of time and place. I didn't think it was out of place that she'd do it for Discord to spare him grief. Discord wants to become the meglomaniac that snaps his claws and gets what he wants. He denies that part of him though this act.
Now, you're right. This story has a shitty message at the end. If someone you love dies, the solution is not to kill yourself. But sometimes people lose their loved ones, and sometimes they kill themselves. It's harsh, but some times people can't go on. Would that everyone could. The fig leaf is that, theoretically, the stone sleep spell could be lifted some time in the future by Twilight, who can ask if he's changed his mind, but honestly I doubt it ever will.
Thanks for the review, though. I really appreciate it.
Nice to see you back with reviews, TD! I hope you're doing well.
5140487
I got the in-story justification for it - you were quite explicit about it - I just felt like it was, fundamentally, him copping out. He was putting all of his positive progress on a single person, but he had, gradually, grown beyond it *just* being about Fluttershy - Spike and Twilight were genuinely his friends as well by the end. He was (understandably) upset about Fluttershy's passing, but it felt like, rather than trying to help him out, they just let him take the easy way out, which is, while not *quite* suicide, certainly close to it.
He didn't want to get over it, he wanted to get what he wanted. Indeed, Fluttershy's own near-last words seemed to suggest she wanted him to get over her and move on with his life, so what he did, while "romantic", was also quite selfish.
I don't think there's anything wrong with writing stories which conclude in a way that I consider to be morally wrong in a storytelling sense. Indeed, I was much more enthusiastic about it the first time I read it, but when I read it through a second time to write the review the wrongness of it struck me much more strongly than it had the first time through (possibly because I had also just read Memorial, which itself touched on Fluttershy's passing and Discord not getting over it, but in a different and deliberately disquieting way).
I thought it was interesting, and the story had a romantic nature to it, and given the way that the story structured itself, the conclusion made perfect sense with the emotional structure of the piece.
5140489
I'm alright! I got a job with the census the last few months, was super busy. I should probably write a blog post about that, but that was why I was even more scarce than I had been since August.
Hope things are going well with you!
5140496
Ah, okay! That'd be an interesting experience to hear about!
Also, I'm picturing your avatar politely knocking on peoples' doors to ask them a few survey questions. :)
IT’S WHAT THE PEOPLE DESERVE
5140494
Fair enough. I'm glad you thought it was still worth reading, in spite of it.
5140510
It was a good emotional read.
And it isn't really "in spite of"; making the audience feel uncomfortable about how a tragic event played out is not inherently a bad thing. It means you touched the audience.
I'm fairly certain that such a law is one of the things that stopped being in the way when the 'former' kicked in.
Whoa, hey, you're back! :D It's been... 21 weeks, apparently! :B
Also, literally none of this is my fault.
5140623
I am indeed! I should probably make a post at some point about my work for the US Census.
Pretty sure I found the story through your blog :V
5140649
Still not my fault. >:V
I find it amusing how many people are comfortable with Sparity and Twilestia, but had an issue with this one for the same reasons they ignore or defend in those fics.
5140750
Those ships have the same issues, really. Sparity is even more uncomfortable in that regard, seeing as Spike is outright depicted as a child. Twilestia creeps a lot of people out because of the whole student/teacher thing.
I was going to make a wry comment about glass houses and smooching alicorns, but I couldn't come up with anything witty.
TBH I think part of the reason why Gallus x Twilight feels weirder to me is the greater proximity; Twilight being Celestia's student was Twilight's backstory, but in the show, they're separated by more distance (and more time at this point, seeing as Twilight stopped being Celestia's student years ago now). But it is definitely still awkward, and I think even a lot of Twilestia shippers find it creepy if Celestia is pursuing Twilight too actively. A lot of the most popular Twilestia fics involve an initial rejection and pain on Twilight's part before she gets what she wants, and I suspect that's partially to overcome that creepy and "make it okay" in their minds.
This might also be part of why a lot of people ship TwiLuna, as they get the immortal alicorn princess smooches without the awkwardness of that student/teacher relationship.
All that being said, there's nothing wrong with shipping Gallus x Twilight. I mean, they even lived in the same city in the epilogue and worked together, clearly that's a sign of true love! And I suspect there's overlap with the hot for teacher crowd.
5140839 Since Gallus is Twilight's head guard/possibly captain I don't see why not :P although in that situation, some time would've passed.