Friendship is Card Games: Better Together, Part 2 · 12:25pm Jan 21st, 2018
We interrupt my Zeno-Achillean efforts to catch up to IDW’s tortoise to take a look at some of the Equestria Girls shorts that have gone up recently. I held back on these because I like being able to provide links to the source material for those who haven’t seen them, and Hasbro has been slow-rolling the YouTube releases to get more people on the Discovery GO app. Thank goodness for Dailymotion.
We’ll begin with what Hasbro’s deigned to unveil on YouTube, starting with what is, to my astonishment, not yet the name of a crossover fanfic. Also, sorry for the audio. Don’t ask me why they uploaded a musical short in mono, but they did.
I have to love that it’s a green wisp of rogue magic that enchants the watering can, for card game reasons. Also, good to know that the rogue magic problem still lingers.
Also also, neat to see that Principal Celestia has a greenhouse. Presumably the analogue of the royal gardens, and support for focusing on her earth pony aspect in my work. No data on where Vice Principal Luna even lives, mind you. We’ve seen some speculation there, but nothing concrete.
Hmm. On the one hand, it’s nice to see that Twilight is no longer traumatized by even the thought of magic. On the other, if she isn’t at least a little concerned by singing plants, then she really does need to brush up on her botany.
That’s like half a year’s worth of water for those tiny cacti.
Uh oh. I’ve seen this level of Cuphead. It doesn’t end well.
I take it the magic has made the watering can bottomless.
Dilute the magic with uncontaminated water? Eh, makes about much sense as anything else in this world regarding the supernatural. It is interesting to see magic’s relationship with music in action with Audreys III through L.
Wow. All Celestia’s missing is a “Happy Tuesday, Twilight! Love the new hairstyle.”
Fun song and a nice reminder that the magic leak never stopped being a thing. I can’t help but wonder if this coincided with pony Twilight trying to get a handle on her earth pony magic with Celestia and Applejack’s help. If so… you know, I’m actually not sure if that would result in more or fewer singing plants. Either way, I may need to file that idea for a rainy day.
I do like how Fluttershy’s developed ongoing friendships with most of the local wildlife in a matter of months.
Canterlot High School, ladies and gentlemen. Where “Those birds were helping her cheat on the math quiz” is treated as a serious accusation. And is one.
You know, if the birds don’t know anything about math, maybe you shouldn’t explain resource distribution to them using it.
It took a bit of research to refresh my memory, but the problem Fluttershy does on the chalkboard appears to involve Gauss’s law. Just don’t ask me why an electrostatics problem is in a math textbook.
And we end with Trixie going off on a tangent. Though given how she sits next to Fluttershy, I suppose it makes sense that her opposite’s over adjacent. 
Ah, Prim Hemline. The question is, did she recently buy out Rarity, or has Rarity worked for her the whole time? Given the new sales outfit, I’m leaning towards the former, which says something about how Prim sees Rarity’s future… though the “working here for months and months” line puts that in doubt. But that raises questions about how human Rarity’s been shown at work before, to say nothing of her suddenly being in the mall in “Good Vibes.”
Eh, I blame Starlight. Eddies in the time-space continuum, and someone should get him out.
Also, is Prim Hemline primarily stationed in town rather than Manehattan in this worldline? Curious.
Wait… okay. Took me a few tries, but Prim isn’t gesturing across the street. Her hand is reaching towards the window display of the shop they’re currently within, and the camera cut to an outside shot of said shop. Some of you probably got that the first time around, but I needed a moment to process it.
I do wish I could see Rarity’s attempt to make a window display out of cheese.
Insert Exit Through Canterlot comment here. To my embarrassment, I still haven't gotten past the first few chapters. Though I doubt either Flanksy’s ever made a bemusement park.
“This isn’t avante garde, it’s avante merde.” Rarity mangled the pronunciation, but that was definitely a French swear in there.
I do love how Rarity loses her accent along with her composure. Great detail by Tabitha there.
So. Add street art to the list of things Sunset did to improve her manual dexterity. Probably created some rather less savory pieces back before she got harmonized.
Interesting short this one, adding some depth to the setting… though not necessarily in directions that make much sense. Still some awesome visual designs, though.
Even without the richer offerings on the app, we’d know Hasbro was restricting supply on these shorts, since this one accidentally went live months in advance for a bit. It’s a shame; these shorts are actually better suited for YouTube than mobile viewing, since the end card of the initial video can present the choice and link to different private videos for each ending. It’s a fantastic use of the medium, and I look forward to seeing the rest where they were meant to be.
For now, though, they’re only available in three variations with the endings preloaded, and I’ll link them appropriately when the time comes for each.
It’s amazing how quickly Flash Sentry can earn and lose my respect. Over the course of a few seconds, I go from “That’s a nice, respectable look for him” to “Did he really just say that” to “It he actually ending the weather report with a guitar solo” to “He wrote his own catchphrase, didn’t he?” To be honest, this opening is, well… adorkable. As I’ve said before, there actually is some chemistry between him and pony Twilight beyond whatever magnetic compounds keep physically pulling them together.
Also, having a pegasus analogue do the weather report. I can’t tell if that’s eerily appropriate or transdimensionally tribalist.
Given how Rarity works for Prim Hemline these days, it makes sense that she’d look to the elder designer for inspiration. This Rarity hasn’t yet reached the level where she’s personally dictating the trends… until today.
I love how Rarity just has a diamond the size of her palm in her purse. As you do.
Who else wants to see the skirt made of snap bracelets? Imagine wearing that thing. One wrong move…
Rarity, you know not what you have unleashed.
Wow. When people other than Pinkie are sneezing confetti, you know it’s bad.
I do love seeing the mundane utility of magical powers.
I hope that last prediction isn’t accurate. Rarity may have given Pinkie an excuse, but Pinkie’s still the one who flooded the school with confetti. No one else should get punished for her excess.
As we’ll see, this one’s a bit of an odd duck. The other endings have the whole school embracing the trend. Here, it’s Pinkie taking it upon herself to make them enjoy it. Odd, but it’s Pinkie Pie. Can’t expect her to follow most patterns.
A bit of G3 leaking through. Rainbows, darling, rainbows!
What, Rarity, all blue people look alike to you without different hairstyles? Though in all fairness, Dash was probably the only one with that hair at CHS… until today.
“Derpuh… No, no, it can’t be.” You all heard it. Well, almost heard it. Can’t have that on the official record, now can we? Still, it is amusing to have one of Dash’s recolors be mistaken for the original model. (She may be Best Sapient, regardless of species, but I have to acknowledge her origins.)
I’m not sure what’s better, rainbow-haired Granny Smith or Rainbow Fabio Bulk Biceps.
… Oh, who am I kidding? Rain-Fabio Biceps may be the most amazing thing I’ll discuss today.
Okay, Zephyr Breeze having rainbow locks is more than a little creepy. That said, Rarity Serling is an amusing note to end on, aside from Dash’s obliviousness. Though I do have to wonder just how easy it is to get the distinct colors in one’s hair, because wow, everyone managed a flawless dye job, presumably overnight. I suppose there are instructional videos on EweTube.
It’s actually kind of nice to see Snips and Snails following Trixie again. Trixie not knowing what books are I’m going to lay on her playing up the role.
Working vocabulary words into conversation may be bombastic at times, but it’s still fun. At least, I think it is.
For the sake of my sanity, I’m going to say that Microchips’s admirers are pronouncing it “sky-ence” ironically.
It is obvious. If that book really did contain everything you wanted to know about arthropods, there wouldn’t be a sequel. 
Wow. No wonder Sunset took over this school. These people would consider sheep a fractious bunch of anarchists.
Still, while this ending paints the student body of CHS in a less than flattering light, it definitely has the happiest resolution for everyone involved.
In all, three flavors of goofy fun, nicely setting the tone for what’s to come.
Given her new explosion powers, it makes sense that Pinkie would take and enjoy chemistry. The more she knows about exothermic reactions, the better, as far as I’m concerned.
That said, if Pinkie’s cupcake frosting qualifies as a single chemical, I definitely don’t want to know what that chemical is.
Pinkie’s in the same year as Snips and Snails? That raises some questions…
Ugh, I thought there was only supposed to be one Timberlight short in here…
Sorry, sorry, just needed to get it out of my system.
“I’m not used to not knowing things.” I have actually been in that exact situation. It is terribly disconcerting to be confronted with something you don’t immediately understand when you’re used to the opposite.
Also, as far as areas of ignorance go, elaborate emoji assemblages is certainly a permissible one. There are some things not worth knowing… Oh dear, how did this cane get in my hand and why am I shaking it?
Huh. Apparently there’s a park opposite the school. At least, there is in this particular splinter of reality.
I love how Fluttershy gets stuck on cats for a bit during her dictation. I wonder if this was improvised.
Next time, Twilight, asks what it means before sending it.
Fluttershy: Answering literally all of her problems with cute animals since 2010. Except math problems.
Leave it to Rarity to be on the cutting edge of any social movement, especially when visual expression is a key part of it.
On that note, if Timber’s spent his whole life at Camp Everfree, where did he pick up his knowledge of modern pictograms? And Rarity, if you like him so much, feel free to—
No, no. I’ll be nice.
“Three balloons,” eh? Makes me wonder what other cutie marks resemble the emojis on offer with the EqG world’s phones. And how the two phenomena interact in general, come to think of it. Hmm, that’s actually quite intriguing…
Okay, the Twily-smiley is cute, I’ll give it that.
I love how Twilight’s principle objection to her interpretation of the message is the impracticality of using golf clubs as spoons. Not flying through waterfalls or dressing up as pirates, the golf club-spoon things. Her inner engineer cannot countenance such a thing, and it’s amazing.
Also, I quite like that Sunset’s a tea drinker. Some parts of being Celestia’s student stick with you no matter what happens afterwards.
And Sunset wins this short by taking the clear and obviously best solution. Also breaking through Twilight’s tunnel vision with a freaking wrecking ball of confidence and mild Ludditism. (After all, when a nationwide telephone network was a novelty when you arrived in a universe, using glorified telegraphs seems downright silly.)
Great picture for Timber there, Twilight.
It’s nice to know both Twilights suffer verbal communication breakdowns when dealing with boys they like. The parallel pleases me, even if other aspects don’t.
Definitely the best option for this one as far as I’m concerned. Good on Sunset for not putting up with this nonsense.
… aaaand now I’m sitting in a rocking chair. Let’s move on before my grandkids cause a paradox by killing me.
Ah, Sunset and motor vehicles. Much like her and emojis, not what I would expect to be a winning combination. Still, it’s not like she can use those back alley connections to get a driver’s license now that she’s going legit.
What? She's managed to lease an apartment and get a job despite being the most alien illegal alien possible. She definitely got some kind of counterfeit documentation at some point.
What exactly does “Not enough experience to pass the driving test” mean, exactly? That’s perhaps the least helpful advice possible, since it doesn’t actually explain what she did wrong, if anything. To say nothing of the school rather than the DMV administering driving tests, but then we’re dragging this universe near areas that may be best left unexplored. Namely government, and by extension, politics. 
Huh. If I had to guess which of the Humane Seven had cars, Fluttershy would've been my last guess.
For a moment, I wasn’t sure if Granny Smith was defending her car or herself.
When’s the last time Applejack saw this truck if she’s surprised by it’s current condition? Isn’t this her garage?
Heh. Visual pun with Applejack lifting the car.
No, Mr. Doodle. It is not fair to fail someone for something that isn’t her fault, and you are exceedingly lucky that she didn’t end your career right now. Seriously, he is playing with fire given Sunset’s capabilities.
Oh. Had to put out there explicitly, didn’t you?
Okay, seriously, how is this man allowed to determine who may operate motor vehicles?
Fluttershy with a pink Smart car. Seems legit.
I really hope Fluttershy’s mother taught her the safety rhyme. And that they recite it together as a mother-daughter in-joke. It’s such an adorable mental image that I want it to be true.
Let’s face it, Zecora would probably make for a much driver’s ed teacher.
Wow, this one was astonishingly lightweight. Still, gave Sunset the fundamentals.
Rarity apparently has enough disposable income to rent a limo for the day. Of course, knowing her, this might represent half of her savings, which she’s gladly giving up to help Sunset from within the mobile lap of luxury.
Randolph? Huh. Didn’t expect to see Diamond Tiara’s butler here. And I can’t imagine that learning to drive in a stretch limo of all things is at all easy. Parallel parking one? I’m not sure if it’s even possible given the geometry involved.
Sunset definitely managed parallel parking more smoothly than I did during my driving test. Rarity’s methods were… bizarre, but I can’t argue with the results.
In all, these aren’t going to revolutionize the human world, but they’re still fun little installments showing the girls are still, well, teenage girls, even with all the magic and superpowers and such. Given Group Precipitation, I certainly can’t complain about thin-cut slices of life in the human world.
And now for the cards. And I won’t even make you download an app to view them!
Style Scout 1W
Creature — Human Scout
Play with the top card of your library revealed.
You may cast the top card of your library if it’s an enchantment card.
The search for the next big thing never ends. Previous successes are merely the last big thing.
2/1
Nest Dispute 2W
Sorcery
Each player other than target player creates two 1/1 white Bird creature tokens with flying.
Some migration patterns form not from instinct but from mutual exasperation.
Class Snitch 1U
Creature — Human Citizen
Sacrifice Class Snitch: Creatures you don’t control lose hexproof until end of turn.
No one likes a tattletale, but they like cheaters even less.
1/3
Rainbow Zone 1U
World Enchantment
All creatures are all colors.
”I can’t tell if I’ve gone blind or if I merely wish to.”
—Rarity
Jamming Forecaster 2U
Creature — Human Band
Finale — Whenever you sacrifice a Song, scry 2.
Behind that winning smile lies a mind that can effortlessly coordinate chord progressions and dew point models.
2/2
Bombastic Youths 3U
Creature — Human Child
Whenever you cast a wordy spell, draw a card. (Something is wordy if it has four or more lines of rules text.)
“You are such an arteriole.”
1/3
Waterfall Turncoat 3U
Creature — Merfolk Pirate
Flying
Sacrifice two Treasures: Put a +1/+1 counter on Waterfall Turncoat.
Remove two +1/+1 counters from Waterfall Turncoat: Create a colorless Treasure artifact token with “T, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool.”
2/2
Swamp Smuggler 3B
Creature — Human Pirate
Raid — When Swamp Smuggler enters the battlefield, if you attacked with a creature this turn, create a 2/2 black Crocodile creature token.
Pirates will happily deal in any contraband, no matter how dangerous.
2/3
March of the Emojis 3BB
Sorcery
Exile all cards from all graveyards. Create a 1/1 colorless Expansion-Symbol creature token for each different expansion symbol among cards exiled this way.
”Words are obsolete. Rise, my minions. We are the new language!”
—Zerivon the Irony-Blind
Textastrophe R
Instant
Textastrophe deals damage to target creature equal to the number of lines of rules text in that creature’s text box.
”When I said ‘use your words,’ this wasn’t what I had in mind.”
—Sunset Shimmer
Pressure to Perform 1R
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +3/+0 and has trample.
At the beginning of your end step, if enchanted creature didn’t deal combat damage to a player this turn, Pressure to Perform deals 3 damage to it.
Calculated Insult 2R
Sorcery
Choose target creature, then recite digits of π from memory until you get one wrong or choose to stop. If you get a digit wrong, Calculated Insult has no effect. Otherwise, it deals damage to that creature equal to half the digits you recited.
The first one’s three.
Unlicensed Driver 2RR
Creature — Human Pilot
1R, T: Untap target Vehicle with crew 3 or less. Gain control of that Vehicle until end of turn. It becomes an artifact creature and gains haste until end of turn.
”Relax. I’ve done this in video games dozens of times.”
3/2
Jalapeño Supernova 4RR
Sorcery
When you cast Jalapeño Supernova, if you control a black or green permanent, Jalapeño Supernova gains wither. If you control a black permanent and a green permanent, Jalapeño Supernova gains deathtouch instead. (A source with wither deals damage to creatures in the form of -1/-1 counters.)
Jalapeño Supernova deals 3 damage to each creature target player controls.
Prismatic Powerhouse 2G
Creature — Human Warrior
Converge — X: Prismatic Powerhouse gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each color of mana spent to activate this ability. Activate this ability only once each turn.
He embodies Canterlot High’s greatest strength, its diversity.
2/2
“Room to Grow” 2GG
Enchantment — Song
At the beginning of your upkeep, put a verse counter on “Room to Grow”.
3G, Sacrifice “Room to Grow”: Lands you control become X/X Elemental creatures until end of turn, where X is the number of verse counters on “Room to Grow”. They’re still lands.
Floral Chorus 3G
Creature — Plant Band
Finale — Whenever you sacrifice a Song, put two +1/+1 counters on Floral Chorus.
”I know studies say singing to plants is good for them, but this seems a bit much.”
—Twilight Sparkle
2/3
Trash Hauler 3G
Creature — Human Citizen
Whenever Trash Hauler deals combat damage to a player, draw a card and exile up to one target card from that player’s graveyard.
”Swept up that dusty old lab for you. No need to thank me.”
3/3
Eco-Friendly Ride 2
Artifact — Vehicle
Whenever Eco-Friendly Ride attacks, untap up to two target lands.
Crew 1 (Tap any number of creatures you control with total power 1 or more: This Vehicle becomes an artifact creature until end of turn.)
3/3
Street Mural 2
Artifact
T: Add C to your mana pool.
Revolt — T: Add one mana of any color to your mana pool. Activate this ability only if a permanent you controlled left the battlefield this turn.
A splash of defiance against cruel mundanity.
Awakening Can 4
Artifact
3, T: Put a +1/+1 counter on target creature.
XGG, T: Put X +1/+1 counters on target creature or land you control. If that permanent isn’t a creature, it becomes a 0/0 Elemental creature with haste in addition to its other types.
Orbiting Masterpiece 7
Artifact Creature — Construct
Flying
Fabricate 4
1, Remove a +1/+1 counter from Orbiting Masterpiece: Create a 1/1 colorless Servo artifact creature token.
1, Sacrifice a Servo: Put a +1/+1 counter on Orbiting Masterpiece.
1/1
Celestia’s Greenhouse GW
Enchantment
When Celestia’s Greenhouse enters the battlefield, create a 0/1 green Plant creature token.
2GW: Populate. (Create a token that’s a copy of a creature token you control.)
Plants love the sun, and the sun reciprocates.
Streetborn Muse 1GW
Creature — Spirit
Revolt — At the beginning of each end step, if a permanent you controlled left the battlefield this turn, put a +1/+1 counter on Streetborn Muse.
”Her voice is the people, proud and unbowed.”
—Rarity
2/2
Torrent of Confetti 1RRG
Creature — Elemental
Trample, haste
At the beginning of the end step, sacrifice Torrent of Confetti.
When Torrent of Confetti dies, put a +1/+1 counter on each creature you control.
You’ll be picking bits out for weeks.
6/1
He says, in the segment immediately after his write-up on "Display of Affection". Your brain's getting foamy, FoME.
Pretty sure they're all wearing Rainbow Dash wigs.
More likely she just didn't take chemistry as a freshman. I know at the very least in my high school days, we had mixed grade classes for things like algebra, chemistry, and physics.
That's how it worked when I was in high school. One of the teachers did all the driving tests and handed us a pass/fail certificate to take to the license office.
I always pictured her as driving a half-broken-down hippie van full of empty cages that perpetually smells like animal droppings.
4778610
Whoops. Wrote that one up first. The original plan was to cover half a dozen multiple-choice videos, but then I realized I could review the entire school play saga in a single blog if I shuffled the schedule a bit. Thanks for the catch.
In most cases, especially those people who had shorter hairstyles the day before, that does make sense. I will note that Sandalwood has rainbow dreadlocks.
Thanks for the input on your school experience. It's far too easy to assume that one's experiences are universal just because one hasn't encountered anything else.
Can I just say how much I love how Twilight and Applejack communicate entirely in emojis and AJ immediately comes over to help? (And later we'll see that Twi is better at communicating in emojis with AJ than with Timber Spruce.)
After the emergency diluting with regular water it's more like five years' worth of water.
When in doubt, always blame Starlight. Or Discord.
Choose-your-own ending is an interesting idea, but it would probably work better on a DVD or Blueray menu. As it is, it's a little hard for me to navigate through them on Youtube. I haven't even finished watching them all yet.
4778610
Yeah, same here. Bonus points if it's got some epic scenario with Princesses Celestia & Luna spray-painted on the side.
"Flanksy" sounds like a reference to something.
Reminds me of this classic.
My Little Shop of Horrors makes me want to write an extended ending/followup. The resolution was way too quick and out-of-nowhere, and there's so much room for expansion. I really want to do it, but I still haven't touched chapter 2 of my first fic, and I hate having multiple things in progress at once. Oh well, maybe someone can write a chapter about it for Group Precipitation?
4778685
"Flanksy" is a ponified version of noted graffiti artist Banksy.
Darling, I think it's "avant marred" as in the adjective tense of "mar."
Mr. Doodle is unexpectedly a totally terrible teacher. I'm not sure I like that; whatever his flaws in the Ponyverse proper, the dude had integrity.
Trixie is just being a low-nuance hag here and I'm not sure how much I like that either. It feels like the author started with "we need a Diamond Tiara type here, but we also need her to be a peer of Fluttershy, so who do we have that's horrid..." This isn't Trixie's breed of horrid, though, and it feels all wrong.
On the gripping hand, I agree that Flash is really upping his dork-cute levels, which is good to see. And Sunset Shimmer's Good Ending to the texting skit is unexpectedly satisfying. My favorite Sunny moment in these CYOA shorts is still on the Go app exclusively for the moment, so I guess we'll talk about that when it comes.
Exit Through Canterlot was pretty good.
SORRY
Maybe their text program is similar to Discord and you can upload your own emojis?
4778798
Nah, she just totally got away with saying "shit"
4778635
I see two possibilities on the emoji front: Either Twilight is a very fast conventional texter, or AJ already knew that Twilight would be in the principal's greenhouse. Plus, "apples-shovel-exclamation points" is a lot clearer than the surreal assembly Timber sent Twilight.
4778665
"I want to cuddle one and never want to stop."
Hmm. Now I wonder if the any of the human main cast have even seen an Equestrian pony, or at least photos of one.
4778689
Funny you should mention that...
Though remember, the Group Precipitation submission thread is always open to all comers.
4778798
Likely what they were going for, but in my heart, it's a tortured bilingual pun.
And to be fair to Mr. Doodle, he does seem to be a good math teacher. Passionate about the subject, serious about academic misconduct without resorting to unthinking zero-tolerance tactics, even ready to spring into action to address "math emergencies," as shown in one ending of "Happily Ever After Party." It's just the things he doesn't care about that he... well, half-asses. He may be following the Calvinist school of onerous tasks.
But yeah, this does feel like a misuse of Trixie.
4778816
All I ask for is some semblance of continuity and stable spacetime, but some ponies have a Freudian bug up their butts.
4780007
Oh nah, the cutie mark thing was the Freudian bug. Breaking time was because I hated Twilight just that fuckin much.
That's right, the S5 premiere and finale run on REEEEE
4778665
4780007
>main cast have seen an Equestrian
Well... I can think of one. One that also apparently does mural work.
Huh?
The trig puns. Why? More seriously, this seems rather advanced material for a high school math class, but what do I know? Maybe CHS is really advanced.
I see what you did there. Anyway, this was an unusually silver-border-heavy set from you. I like it.
5167720
Compare the princess's reaction to seeing her student in a sneaking suit and an eyepatch in "It's About Time" to the principal checking in on the botanical mayhem. Same cheerfully blase energy.
Hey, Cheerilee was teaching Kepler's laws of motion to Ponyville grade schoolers. Clearly both worlds hold their students to very high standards indeed.