Season of Spooky: There Is Nothing More Terrifying than Metafiction · 6:05pm Aug 2nd, 2016
You know, I am so glad I decided to write at least two non-pony horror entries for this series, because I'm afraid that I'm probably going out on a low note here. This is not a bad story, but in terms of actual horror potential I think it's weaker than both of the two stories I've talked about before. It was too interesting, however, not to write about, and since I only found it through the recommendations I got from my first blog, I felt it was only right to share it here. Plus, my other options were not anything I wanted to write a whole essay about. Several of the other stories recommended were great, but they were all sort of self-evidently great. For a sampling of stories from this dive I really enjoyed though, I thought "413 Mulberry Lane" was fantastic and basically a great Twilight Zone episode; "No One Goes There" is a great campfire story; "babytails" is one of those body horror meets growing-up horror meets conspiracy stories that I just love; and "Let Me Tell You About the Hole in My Face" is a long, detailed metaphor that somehow works as a stand-alone story. These are all great and you should check them out, and they are just a sampling of what I read, there is so much more I have to cover, thank you guys, wow.
Except for some reason instead of writing about any of the above, I feel like talking about Synchronicity. The title track from the album of the same name by British punk-rock turned whatever-they-were-at-the-end-of-their-career band The Police, "Synchronicity" is a song exploring the interconnections present between all things and also yes, not the same thing as the story I am writing about.
So the first thing I need to do is apologize because I am about to show one of my massive reading biases here. I love metafiction that uses the very specific framework of characters in a story talking about and referencing other stories of the same genre*. Not in a ham-fisted way, mind you, and not in a way that doesn't enhance the story, but it's still one of my weaknesses. As for why I have this bias, Scarlet the nuanced and discerning reader would argue that since I've consumed so many gosh-darn pulp stories across multiple genres, I naturally gravitate towards stories that reward me for my knowledge and interest. Scarlet the more honest deranged fangirl blames everything on seagulls.
At least two of my followers are going to understand that one.
The point is that Synchronicity was destined to make my nice list right from the very first chapter. You could have ended the entire story on that chapter, and I would have still classified it as one of the best stories I've read on FimFiction. The story opens on Twilight and the girls having a slumber party while waiting out a storm. And, like most slumber parties that do not involve video games, drinking, or bacchanalian orgies**, eventually the topic has moved to the telling of spooky stories. After a lackluster performance of an old standard by Applejack, Rarity steps up to take the stage and tell her own spooky story.
Now so far this is a very standard spooky-story opening in its own right. Somebody tells a scary story, someone investigates, the story turns out to be real is a very standard formula in horror. Where "Synchronicity" piqued my interest is in just how this story is told. Rarity doesn't make it five lines through before everyone else at the party- with the exception of Twilight, who has never actually heard this one before - begins interrupting and sharing their own opinions on 'how the story goes'. It turns out that there are at least three distinct versions of the story, and while the basic framework is the same they all differ wildly in precise details. Twilight proposes visiting the mansion in the story- it's a real place apparently, roll with it - and this is where things get fun.
What I love about the opening chapter of "Synchronicity" is that the storytelling split serves a double purpose. The first is that the dialogue is fairly believable. Old spooky stories are, well, old, and tend to have enormous variations depending on when you first heard them and who told them to you. I have also started telling stories only to be interrupted by people who think I'm telling them 'wrong'. The contrasting versions not only build interest and mystery, but also give the scene a more genuine feel.
The following chapters include some spicy details in their own right. Twilight and Rainbow Dash begin talking through the versions of the story, and Twilight mentions that each variation carries morals that tie back to particular quirks in the fears of each major pony type. This was a clever enough twist that I actually suspended my usual reflexive facepalm that accompanies "the three tribes have a long history of racial tension" worldbuilding.*** The story then drops a journal - potentially something with real accounts of the events that inspired all three stories - right into Twilight's hooves. After taking it home, however, she and Rainbow Dash begin having rather disconcerting nightmares. And....
...and I'm not going to lie, this is about the point where I think Synchronicity starts to break down a little bit.
See previous to this point, the story has been equal parts horror, mystery, and light romance as Twilight and Rainbow Dash spend time together and exhibit some great understated chemistry. The problem is that the mystery element - Twilight's investigation of the journal and the story - has to eventually lead somewhere. Like most great mysteries, the specific reveal isn't as important as the interactions of the characters on the way there, but you still ideally have to pull off a reveal that makes the audience go 'ooh' on the first time through. This is doubly true in a horror story. Twilight and Rainbow Dash talking about regional variations on horror stories, Rainbow's love of horror comics, and how pegasus ponies have a "thing about plants" all seems like it's leading to a conclusion where that insight into horror will play some kind of role in the actual story. The constant nightmares Rainbow Dash has about Twilight, bad investigations, and black roses in the mansion all seem to be leading somewhere as well, on a convergent path.
The thing is that well...
Returning to film analogies for a moment. In horror movies, nine times out of ten the monster is scarier before you see it. Most horror films rely on building suspense and anticipation, so what ends up scaring you isn't seeing the monster, but imagining that the monster is there. When it actually shows up, if the effects work or makeup were weaker than the build you end up having a reaction that's less "OH MY GOD, THE MONSTER" and more "oh come on, that's just Ted from the stunt team in a rubber suit!"
In fiction the equivalent of Ted in the Rubber Suit is having a reveal that doesn't connect to or deliver on the buildup. Synchroncity's conclusion is a bit of a letdown. Spoilers: Twilight and Rainbow are both absolutely fine by the end. This is not the problem. The problem is that the story never really delivers on the idea that they're in danger. The big payoff for the introduction of comparative creepy storytelling is that Twilight and Dash end up using common ghost story tropes to try to solve the mystery of the journal, and it works. The thing is that the mystery laid bare is... just not all that compelling. The consistent dreams of black roses that end badly turn out to be a reference to the fact that the mare who owned the mansion and wrote the journal tried to invent the elixir of life and ended up brewing a fatal poison, Which, well, of course she did. I mean she was using black roses as an ingredient. The only way you could get less appropriate for a spell of eternal life would be if you used dead bodies as a catalyst. Even worse than that, Twilight sends the poison off to space, and the story then implies that bad things may happen in the future by ending on the note that the bushes around the manor will "bloom with black roses".
Except that the black roses themselves aren't dangerous, the poison isn't dangerous unless you drink it, and the real moral of the story should be to always test potentially toxic substances on laboratory mice before chugging them.
This is not the most compelling shoe to drop, is what I'm saying. There is nothing overtly horrifying about the ending. There are no consequences for anyone. There's no hint that the cycle is actually doomed to repeat itself, which is a strong component of scary stories since time immemorial. I was personally hoping for a Haunting of Hill House twist where Twilight and Rainbow Dash would end up un-knowingly mirroring the fates of the two characters in the spooky story, which would have not only delivered on the recurring dreams but also on the metafiction builds. As it is, the story goes from being really good to abruptly and suddenly failing to satisfy.
To be clear: I love the hell out of Synchronicity. It is good. It is worth reading. My re-read of the story in preparation for this blog made me feel a bit less kind to it, though. If you are going to try and write a meta-fictional mystery/suspense story, your payoff has to be really gloriously perfect. Oliver's Aporia is a good example of a story that actually does this. I also really liked Heart of an Author by Oroboro, but that's one I'm not sure I can recommend unless you're familiar with the other half of its thematic crossover.
Regardless of whether it can't find the strength to end as well as it began, the build of Synchronicity is strong enough that I wholeheartedly endorse giving some time to it. Just do that only after investing time in stories with stronger conclusions.
And that actually wraps up the pony horror focused portion of "The Season of Spooky". My next two blogs, which will officially wrap the series up until next year, are going to be recommendations and loving theses on two of my favorite horror novels of all time, and why I think they're good starting points for learning how to write the genre.
Join me, won't you?
*Yes, I have seen Scream. Yes, I liked it.
**Just me?
***Before anyone asks: Yes, they sort of did way back before the founding of Equestria, no, I don't think it's relevant to the universe of the show as it currently stands, and yes, what really annoys me is how lazily it's usually implemented. I still facepalm by default for the same reason I do when anyone pitches me a "but what if Spike were badass and all the ladies want to DO him" story.
It surprises me too sometimes, but the vast majority of my readers, many whom adored HoaA, have no idea what an Umineko is and never will. But it worked for them anyway. Even my mom was able to follow what was going on, and she barely knows ponies either.
Guess I did something right. I still always try and recommend Umineko to anyone who will listen though.
I'm stealing that like about Spike. No, I'm literally stealing it for my next blog, it's all set. >.>
4128117 The subgenre where subtlety, characterization, and hope for humanity goes to die!
4128130
And how!
I would love to know what you think of this...
4128147 I heartily approve.
Excellent use of prose trickery.
Another stellar blog as always. n_n
So I just thought I'd mention that you're now a Hugo-nominated blogger. Namely, I just listed you on my Hugo Awards nominations ballot for Best Fan Writer.
This has approximately 0.000% chance of getting you on the shortlist that actually leads to an award, but I make a point to try and include something from my ponyfic reading in my ballot each year, and your ongoing blogging is one of the things I most look forward to here. So thank you!
4460951 i'm adding this to my user page now I can't even. Pffft.