It’s Present Perfect’s Fault · 5:13pm Jul 28th, 2016
For the foreseeable future, I’m going to point to Cleave as my smartest, most intellectually stimulating (and possibly most underrated) story (which definitely has the best hook). Now I’d like to introduce you to a contender for the most random:
A massage is just a massage, isn’t it? Apparently not when Spike is involved. Somehow finding a book on pony massage specifically for handed creatures like himself is fated to end the way that most of his adventures do: with the untimely destruction of Ponyville.
Unless Rarity can help, of course.
There’s a certain type of story, the kind that invariably ends with the main character accidentally ruining some aspect of civilization (ie burning down Ponyville). I’ve never been a big fan of those. And yet here I am posting what could be considered a deconstruction of the trope. Or maybe it’s just a reverse of Inspiration Manifestation. All I can say for sure is:
It’s weird.
It’s random.
It’s mildly suggestive.
I’m not sorry, but Present Perfect probably will be for releasing the prompt "Soft Hands" upon the world. Sigh.
EDIT: And we've achieved feature-box status! Thanks, all 
It has Spike and Rarity. No need to say sorry for that.
Oh, I already am, don't worry :V (I'm glad entries are finally coming in though!)
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This was a shot from the
flankhip, too. I didn't set out with the express purpose of giving you an ulcer, but the only other story I have in the works that could fit the prompt is definitely not going to be finished in time. Plus with all the stupefyingly bad and/or disturbing-sounding stuff you read and review, you probably have a loyalty punch card from your local hospital anyway. I'm not deliberately messing with you, I'm just helping you on your way to that free CAT scan