A confession and a request · 10:35pm Sep 29th, 2014
If you have not read the recent chapter of Piercing the Heavens, please do so before reading this.
Sigh... this is hard for me to bring up because i don't want anyone to suddenly be scared to talk to me. I pride myself in having open communication with all of my readers, i'm not above anyone else, nor do i wish to be... but it has backfired on me as of the past weeks.
Chapter 43 of Piercing the Heavens was NOT supposed to be how it is. In fact... the SoarinDash moment in this chapter was not supposed to happen for at least another 10-12 chapters... I have a major outline that i've written up that has the exact order in which i wish for events in the story to happen, but i forced this scene forward. It has had quite an enormous impact on my outline... and requires me to completely redo my outline for the rest of part 2... part 3 and 4 are not changed, but my original plan for part 2 is now completely broken.
I'm going to say this before anything else. THIS. IS. MY. FAULT. i did not make this blog post to put blame on anyone or point the figure for my mistakes.
The number 1 rule of being a writer is to write from your heart... not from what's trending and not from what you hear is popular or what have you. You MUST write from what you feel in your heart, doing it any other way will is killing your own potential.
But... I caved to my readers...
i've been receiving comment after comment and pm after pm asking me when Soarin and Dash are getting back together... not so much in the comments... but some of the PM's the readers have expressed annoyance.
In general i have never felt as much pressure to write at a high level consistently and constantly like i have with Piercing the heavens... its partly my own fault for having such a quick update time, creating quite a high expectation for myself to please my readers on close to a daily basis. I was afraid i was going to lose readers if i didn't rush along or change something...
so i did... and now i have to change a lot of stuff, because i'm NOT changing what i just spent all weekend working on.
Not only did this throw off my outline... but i also felt the need to force the lask 5K words into the chapter to get the SoarinDash scene out... by doing so i COMPLETELY drew focus away from two VERY important scenes that i was very excited to get to in the story... those being when Storm receives the letter from his father, and when Silver has the heart to heart with Dash before beginning her training. I felt like those two scenes completely disappeared because there was next to no comment on those scenes... it was all about the fluff. Which i wanted to do... but at the cost of blanking out two very important moments.
So... as i have said... not any of this is anyone's fault but my own... and i apologize if my next few updates are a little slow because of the great amount of rethinking i have to do for part 2... but i have just a very small request.
I wish to keep being as friendly and talkative with the readers as i have been throughout this whole amazing process... but i would request that you all limit asking me direct questions about when things are going to happen in the story. This is a story i have planned from start to finish. All the events are to happen in a very specific order. i felt so pressured to write the SoarinDash scene that I forced it out and put a snag in my original plan. It's never going to be how i originally intended it now (at least for part 2) but i'm sure i can remold it to work.
Again... nobody is at fault here but me, i simply ask to ease up a little on when anticipated moments will happen so i don't worry or feel pressured to rush.
I don't want anyone to think i'm angry either... i'm just disappointed in myself for forgetting rule number 1.
Thank you so much for all your support thus far, i hope i can continue to entertain... but i hope i don't bend under pressure again... not delivering my original idea feels like i've messed up royally, not just for me... but for all of you too.
Sorry...
Sorry you're beating yourself up over this man.
Just....I guess.....take it as a learning experience? It was still a bomb-ass chapter either way though.
Oh, it's okay Calm. Sorry you got so much pressure on you that this happened, I'm sure you'll be able to get this smoothed out in no time. You are the amazing Calm Wind after all
please take your time, and have fun. That's the most important thing, having fun. 
wish you best luck! 
Well give me a few moments to go and read it, I've been really behind on reading. Then I can be outraged. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Wow I had no idea... Sorry. Maybe we shouldn't been more sensitive. I don't write much, but if I did, I'd probably feel the same way. And with your creativity and writing skills, i'm sure the rest of the story is gonna be amazing!
Calm, It happens to the best of us. I spent what must have been 16 hours completely reworking a drawing because one of my friends saw it and commented on it in my studio before it was finished. In the end I had to scrap the piece because I wasn't satisfied with the end result and if I'm not satisfied with my work then whats the point?
As reader's It is our job to comment on and follow the path that you've set, not to dictate when and where the path takes us.
- Aoki
Oh.... I'm sorry Calm.
I'll try not to next time.
You haven't messed up in my book!
Hey, itll be alright. You may not know it yet, but it could end up a blessing in disguise!
Remember, were here for ya man. When and if you get on tonight, we'll be eager to let ya vent and try to help where we can.
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Thank you all for understanding me...
I'm not angry at anyone in fact i would rather punch myself in the face than cut back on how much i interact with you guys... i just can't believe i let myself cave like that. Goes to show you that i'm far from perfect. i've been writing for 15 years and i made a basic mistake. If anything this can show you guys even more that i'm just another fimfic user when it comes down to it and i want to be in touch with everyone.
So you compromised your personal desires of writing for satisfying us crowds, huh? It's a writing sin, but you did it with the best of intentions, I think you need to make sure you write it exactly how you want to from now on. I thought those scenes were great, and I'm sorry about how it turned out. Just know we all believe in you, and we'll still read even if you don't answer our questions.
You're still human and you make mistakes, I'll stick by you regardless. Keep on moving on, I'll be behind you the whole way, big bro. This story is the best SoarinDash fic on here, and a hiccup in the planning won't change that fact. Even if you don't want to go back to the original outline and fix how the chapters are now, you'll find a way out of this.
You've got my support, keep on keeping on
2494368 Hey, we're only human dude. We all make mistakes. It's what you learn from them that's important.
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m.youtube.com/watch?v=d-diB65scQU
I'm doing this on an iPod so I'm not sure if that'll work.
Wow wow wow... Back it up... Berating yourself never helped anyone... Trust me, I've done it enough in my life
...
... And you don't need to listen to us when it comes down to it. I'm sure most of us at least would have enjoyed this story even if there were 40 more chapters before they got back together 
The chapter was great, and would be with or without the reuniting of Soarin and Dash... Those other two scenes did make their own marks... On me in any case...
People will remember them... The hype has just made the final scene attract more thought and comment space... Not to mention was at the end and at the top of your head... But I see where your coming from with that
As for it all happening too soon, I don't blame you... I did see a lot of comments asking about it... And if you say the pm's were worse... Then holy cow... But it's not your fault... Honestly, if your getting annoyed at someone for something they aren't getting paid to do that benefits you... It's just not right...
I'm sorry if anything I ever said added to the pressure you felt
So write on... Follow the plan... And we shall read
Well, Calm, you could probably detail what one of Applejack's primary feathers looks like and I'd still read it, and (due to lack of nearby Larson) Applejack doesn't even have wings.
The pressure and expectations is probably a tough thing to keep up with all the time, and I don't blame you for cracking. If it'd been me, I probably would have ages ago. Rest assured, though, all of us will remain with you. The story you weave is a wonderful one, and we're quite willing to ride it out with you. Never feel the need to change vision just because we get impatient/antsy/pushy. What you put out is always worth the wait.
...Also, sorry about you having to reconfigure how Part 2 is gonna play out.
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no, you're right and no pressure has been added, i just wished to share this info because i stand by the fact that my readers are as much a part of the story's creation as i am. I just let that go a little overboard
the pm's weren't that bad, some a tad pushy, i just smiled assured them it would be eventually and went on my way... i did recieve one or two that were quite... troubling, but i'll leave it at that.
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it's not quite as bad as i may have made it sound... i already have most of it reworked, outlining isn't hard if you have all your ideas together. it's just gonna play out a little differently than ariginally intended. No true harm was done, i just felt stupid for caving to the pressure.
Sorry to hear you were felt as if you were being pressured. Good luck with the next few chapters. You'll do great.
Let the readers push all the want, your not obligated to them other than producing a media for them to consume. A tad harsh, probably, but if you have a story that you want to tell then you should allow yourself to tell. Specially if the pay off is going to be that much greater when done right. I've enjoyed your stories and your a good writer. Don't let the fans push in a direction your not ready to go.
Stick with the plan, man.
2494368 You're one of the first popular I've heard of people who interacts with their fans this much! It's really amazing that you can do it all and still get these chapters out! Try not to beat yourself up. Learn from mistakes and move on! Like you said earlier (;
I don't think I've ever read a story whose writer interacts with the readers on a daily basis. I doubt that you've messed up bad. So your plans get derailed. Okay, it can be a big deal, but it might as well be a blessing in disguise... or a double edge. (I prefer the former.)
Don't beat yourself up. Things happen.
INNOCENT HERE!
I actually loved the build up on the suspense, but it was nice to see them together again.
I've caved in before by doing rewrites, but didn't cave too much.
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it's a lesson i learned long ago, alas i slipped up here... thankfully it was at a point in the story where it was not of much consequence.
still, thank you for the kind words
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i dont know why more people don't do it
you guys make the whole experience so much fun
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it's fun to interact with my readers
It's made the whole experience so much more fun 
2494542 Hey, you write what your thinking... In a nice and "calm" (
) manner... That isn't overboard, it's completely fair and valid...
... Couldn't think of a better author to do it 
Still, I hope you can at least enjoy writing the rest of this part at least...
From what you said about 10 to 12 more chapters... I'm getting the idea that part 2 will end up longer than part 1 was... If it stays that way...
Your really heading for the longest story out there aren't you
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longest story on the site is currently 1,701,514 words...
doubt ill get that far... i'm guessing 800K will be where this ends.
Ah, hmm!
Well, I guess this is a by product of this instant-messaging, microwaveable, instant-gratification mess of a world in which we live now. Don't worry about your decision to reshuffle, just stick to your narrative guns from now on and develop the story in your own sweet time.
I think that most of us are mature enough that we won't mind waiting. 
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yeah i was originally gonna let it go much longer, but i forgot my experience all but briefly and it caused this... im reworking the outline, but the damage far from killed the story, just had to move some things around.
it's all still gonna continue smoothly, i just feel a little embarrassed that this happened after 15 years of writing
even the most experienced of us make mistakes, we are only human.
Dude, you don't have to feel bad. I do.
I'm so sorry if I added to the pressure(which I most likely did, considering I was one of those commenters
). I'm ready to take partial blame(I only say partial bc I know I'm not the only one).
I never wanted you to do this out of pressure. Now I feel horrible, because all of the thought that you put into part 2, you're rethinking. I promise to ease up on adding to the pressure from now on, and will stick to that promise as much as humanly possible.
I helped contribute to making an author feel stupid... I'm the stupid one, Calm. Not you. You only were worried about fans losing interest in you.
Words cannot express how guilty I feel right now knowing what I've participated in doing to you. Again, I'm so sorry.
2494820 Oh
... Well... Umm... Dedication??? Much?... Yep... I'ma... Gonna... Geeeez....
Close enough...
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noooooononono don't feel guilty... in fact everything is a ok, it's a good thing it happened here, because it only effected part 2.
Don't feel bad, this wasn't meant to make you guys feel bad, i'm the one that caved... it was weird that it got to me now, i had handled it all fine for so long, i guess mixed with how much i do at work now my defenses weakened a bit due to stress.
I dont want anyone to lessen how much they talk to me, just politely requesting the "when is this happening" talk be reigned in a little
2494368 Hey, it's okay. You're right, no one is perfect. Don't go beating yourself up over it though, you still did an amazing job. And wow 15 years? Now that's dedication.
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thank you
and yeah, haha i've been at it for a while 
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Aww.... Don't bring yourself down!
I would have totally caved in too.....
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i sure have lurnded my lesions and lurnd from my mistakes 
oh man i understand you complete if anyone knows bening under pressure it's me but you seem like you have it a lot worse than me but i have bent under pressure many times but not on fimfion in the real world i was sure as hell bending under pressure when the whole me lieing insedent happened and i understand and im sorry if i pressure you
but yeah it is hard to not cave under pressure espesally when you wright a good story like PTH evryone will want to know who it ends but with me i am lurning more and more pasents over the years and i have lurned to not question others actions you are not thought of any less calm winds just because this happened doens't mean we hate you and you shouldn't hate your self for making this mistake every one makes mistaks and we lurn by them don't we
Hey, do what you think is best, your story after all.
No pressure.
Sorry if i was one of those that pressured you but don't beat your self up dude your one of the most humble authors on here that i feel i can type a comment on your stories without being scrutinized. Not to mention I think your one of best writers who support soarinxrainbowdash and you definitely deserve a spot up there with all the great soardash writers like crown prince, thatbronyoverthere and a few others i forgot to mention.
2494368 From one writer to another, you'll get through this and we all know you will still blow us out of the water with whatever you come up with. I do hope Silver and Rainbow's heart-to-heart scene comes back though. That's what really took it for me.
So yea, don't beat yourself over this. With one turn of the story, another amazing turn will shine through the darkness. You got this.
Just who the hell do you think you are?! The manliest, badass writer of this amazing story.
Oh.. i know im one of those people who kept on asking when soarindash is gonna happen, but i didnt really think about forcing, i was juat wondering when it will be out
sorry. But that's alright if you need to rethink, i can take a little off time from reading too. And i'll have more time to do other things. Don' t worry about people hating you for this, it's only going to be a.. hard probably, thinking, for part 2, so i don't think anyone will judge you. Unless they're too stupid to understand your situation. 
Good luck thinking out the new part 2!!!!!
i put those emoticons as cheers... not as yays... 
Don't let that get to you sorry about it thou I didn't mean to but your a amazing writer you come up with something before I can get a boyfriend :) ............wait
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Thanks guys, i'm alright, and to be honest i've already mostly figured out what i'm going to do. The original plan for part 2 wasn't scrapped per se, mostly just damaged. i had to reorder some things, but it will still flow.
in fact i added a whole new segment when i reworded the outline last night so i think it will work out just fine
i don't any of you to feel bad, and i take eagerness as a compliment... it just got to me after a while with a mix of real world stress and trying to remain constant with updates. I really didn't want to disappoint anyone, and i got a little ahead of myself.
i wrecked the original part 2 plan in the process, but i think the new one will be even better
2496141 thats great to hear!
So you just, probably went a liiiitle overboard in the explanation? Because you said here, the whole part 2, you need to rethink about. 
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i have had to rethink part 2 entirely... but the events i had in place are still present. i didnt have to come up with something new all together, i just had to reorder things and come up with some new things. it's all good now, and im already writing again, next chapter should be out tomorrow
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Ohh, so basically, you just, like, put the existing events and reorganized when they will happen, then added a few events here and there to fill up some holes? If thats the case... you're a really fast thinker, having thought all of the future events by now!
2497736 more or less... a few things are now impossible... but i've already thought through the possibilities going forward with what i've got here and now. So it sucks that i had to scrap my original plan, but i have a new... better one already in place
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Okie dokie then! Great to hear, good luck writing the next
fewchapters!2497751
Okie dokie then! Great to hear, good luck writing the next
fewchapters!2496141
That's good!
Good luck with the rest too, I'm looking forward to it.
So... no more skydiving through roofs?
And, honestly, I was going to comment about something in the Dash and Silver scene, something about him being replaced and I had a really good remark... but then I forgot it.
Also, the Storm Front... I was never going to comment on that. Not in a million years, not if it was the only scene in the chapter. I'm very sorry, but I just can't.
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oh no, the skydiving can remain
i don't mind the eagerness for chapters to be released soon.
there were some who were... really diving down my throat for SoarinDash... not really in the comments. Those were fine, but i was getting some PM's mostly from people who never comment directly on the story, that were quite... demanding. it was really all of it put together.
so keep diving, i dont have a problem with chapter anticipation, this was a story event people were demanding before i was ready for it
and... sorry if i stirred any memories or something related to the Storm scene
2498760 YAY!! THE DIVING HAS BEEN CONTINUED!!
And, no... not memories. I like memories, and I like sharing memories, and I like being reminded of memories (which happens a lot), even if they're sad or they make me sad. Memories are nice.