UK PonyCon 2023 Report – Part 1: Hasbro claims it’s the 40th Anniversary. They lied, they lied. · 5:00pm Oct 11th, 2023
I'm gonna need a smaller lanyard…
No lengthy preamble needed this year – as it had only been a year since my last UK PonyCon as opposed to the agonisingly long three between my initial and sophomore outings, while I was still hugely pumped, going felt more natural and par for the course, to the point I booked accommodation a whole four months ahead (and it was still more expensive than last year, but more on that later). And while I doubted it would hit the personal heights last year did for me, largely for the emotional release then (though also for the voice actor guests – hard to top Andrea Libman!), I was looking very forward to the event, to seeing my friends, and just to get away from it all. With the con’s social media posting many times in the lead-up about most ticket types selling out – even the single Sunday ones did point-blank, not just the premium types – it was clear no real attendance shrinkage was in effect yet either.
Most of all, even if this wouldn’t compete emotionally, that I would be fully healthy as opposed to combating a loss-of-appetite bug would make this pure pleasure without maintenance caveats (beyond the commuting and early rise, of course). Nothing to do now but go for it! Wednesday rolled around, I clocked out of work until the following Wednesday, and was all set.
Friday: Irony Is A Dish Best Served With Bile
Applejack and I had quite a poignant goodbye from our herd for four days. She sensibly decided Meta Knight was the best to manage things while we were gone. He has enough commanding presence that it doesn't matter those like Pinkie are twice his size.
I should have copped something was amiss when a late dinner on Thursday took an age for me to struggle through (normally the quickest meal of the day for me), yet it didn’t become readily apparent until a few mouthfuls of cereal the following morning left me awfully queasy: I had the same bug as last year. 
I need hardly elaborate on how gutted I was at this, not least for it hitting this close meaning I was more liable to have its peak dominate more of the con. But there was nothing for it but to soldier on, and at least after last year, I was prepared enough. I already had the sweets I would be sustaining myself on during the con, so other than packing some backup painkillers (not that they do much, this is something where, properly hydrated, you feel fine except for being not hungry and hungry simultaneously), and switching to buttered toast, my packing and morning didn’t change. Unlike before, my flight was late enough (15:10) to not require an early rise, so I set off just after noon, with some Ponyfics downloaded as usual for the three major commute phases (bus, flight, & train).
Buckle in for some drama, folks, as it didn’t take long for a hiccup with knock-on effects. 
Possibly because it had been ages since I’d gone to the airport via normal public transport on a Friday (as opposed to an overpriced express coach), I drastically underestimated the commute time, figuring I wouldn’t get peak levels of traffic going through the city centre. Alas, it took almost exactly two hours to get there, leaving me just under 50 minutes before takeoff. I got lucky and blitzed through security (including being advised by the guard there to not rush getting my things out as that would make mistakes more likely, causing a delay via a more thorough examination), enough that I could slow to hydrate and check the plumbing. However, it didn’t get me nearly enough time back for the lunch meal I’d planned, so straight to the gate it was.
The flight itself and the further commute to Nottingham were largely uneventful, all on-time and well organised (though I swear train travel from Birmingham International to Nottingham didn’t set me back £30 last year…). The lack of a lunch meal (which wouldn’t have been full-sized anyway) meant I dove into that day’s snacks much sooner than anticipated. By this point in the day the potential of bile is gone, it’s just being behind on your food intake and unable to fully catch it up. Ponyfic passed the time fine, though in retrospect, I possibly should have gone with the Adventure fic over the Drama one, to keep my still-generally-high moods even further from dipping.
Not pictured: AJ being awfully affronted after this photo when I asked, inspired by Izzy and Spitfire, if I could hitch a ride on her. As you might expect, she refused point-blank. Still, I wasn't worried, what with a con primed to wear down her stubborn defences…
I purposefully didn’t completely finish off that day’s sweets so that, when I arrived in Nottingham round seven and began the uphill trek to the Roebuck Inn for the regular pre-con meet with the Worcester group of Bronies I’ve grown awfully attached to, I’d have no trouble powering through a good meal. It worked well enough: I was still slow enough that I didn’t chance ordering seconds, which might have helped in hindsight, but it was at a normal enough pace, and I could focus on my friends. Not Fimfic folk beyond Loganberry and hawthornbunny, but a great crowd that’s as charmingly awkward as myself and not too intense. My late arrival relative to most meant little happened beyond chats about the con and other My Little Pony things (and seeing some new folks in the group I’d not yet met in spirit), but a good time was had by all. And prone to my usual observations about the peculiar adjustment I make every year to British coins (I use just cash on these trips, avoiding extortionist debit card currency conversions).
…Hey, some higher-value coins are smaller than the next one down, that’s not normal! 
Still, starting with Logan leaving at nine for his easier-on-the-wallet stay in Darby, folks began leaving for one reason or another, and around ten, the last of us did too. My hotel this year was right nearby, a Premier Inn again, but not the same one just down the road from the college where the event is run: possibly because of the con being a week earlier in the year and coinciding with a popular local event called Goose Fair, but likely just from a general worldwide trend, that would have cost me an extra £100 over 2022, even with booking over two months earlier. Setting my sights on a different Premier Inn by the town square only brought that down by about £50, so I’d proposed sharing a room, and Hawthorn was more than game. Lad didn’t even mind having to wait for me to check in – I’d send the info so he could do it, but he stuck at the pub upon settling there. What a chap.
Now, we went there, checked in, and had some pretty uneventful settling in and preparation enlivened enough by punchy dialogue. The room and bathroom were rather small, and I’d chalked this up to the smaller hotel size, though it might also have been related to my getting a leftover accessibility room last year. After getting something of a sneak preview of Hawthorn’s sophomore cosplay, as his Pony OC, we turned in for the usual early rise.
Leaving Pinkie was a tough choice, but what clinched it was how early a riser Applejack is, to the point even a poignant moment with me overlooking the city this late only held her attention for a few seconds. Can't beat that kind of supportive knock-on effect!
Saturday: Hasbro claims it’s the 40th Anniversary. They lied, they lied.
No mid-night awakenings, but as usual, anticipation got me up earlier than my alarm, round when Hawthorn rose and was finishing getting decked out as Hyacinth (best described as a floral hippie pony). He was already planning to be flexible with where he had breakfast, so I’d anticipated doing it solo downstairs already, but he ended up having to detour back to the prior night’s pub for a misplaced bag which included some valuable head adornments for the look, among other things. As documented in his own report, not the first thing he’d forget that weekend either. So I went down alone. As it was barely eight, I chanced my mitt with cereal again, but that didn’t take, so back to bread and water it was: I was determined to not push my luck with it this year and later deposit the food in the bog.
Definitely my slowest morning, nibbling away as I listened in on the handful of con goers here (notably less than the one right by the venue). I didn’t chime in as I needed the personal quiet there and then. Hawthorn poked in just as I was finishing, having been successful in his bag recovery, albeit with some lost items (thankfully the only time that happened). As he still needed to finish, I recovered my gear, hydrated up and headed for the venue. Despite cold weather the prior two weeks in the British Isles, it was warm at almost 20 degrees, so minimal extra attire was needed, something that would stay true through the weekend.
For all you Yanks unfamiliar with Her Majesty, meet Brittania. The life and soul of the con, an absolute pleasure. Connoisseur of British cuisine, and host of her own takes on Taskmaster and the Great British Bake-Off. Could give Pinkie a run for her baking bits!
Despite getting there at not even 9:20, the queue was already substantial enough. I was only 14 or so spots behind Logan, but between a hefty priority queue and 2 of the 4 code scanners inside getting knackered and slowing registration, it still took a half-hour and change after opening at ten to get in the door. And as I’d anticipated it being quicker, I was rather bursting for much of it, sitting on the ground. Eventually, I was in, and ten-odd minutes later, through bag checks and reg with a lanyard. Not just any lanyard either: they had not only upgraded from the paper sheet inside plastic covers to plastic cards with different arts for the different ticket types, but they even printed your custom name if you gave one! This contributed to the queue, as it meant a specific card had to be picked out for each person, but for a unique identifier like this, it was worth it tenfold.
[sigh…] No, Applejack, not for you…! 'Applejack' does not begin with a 'G' in English. Who's a silly pony indeed…
Oh yes, you might recall I was fit to bursting. Following a trip to the bog and much drinking, I did a quick stall scan and caught the end of the opening ceremonies. Being honest, I missed most of it, including the intros for this year’s guests, Kelly Sheridan (finally here after initially being scheduled for the postponed-the-cancelled 2020 edition!) and Elley-Ray Hennessy, but I wasn’t worried, as I had their later panels for that. I hadn’t instantly committed to my first panel, but off most of my group opting for a light opener with Catchphrase, the first of many spoofs on UK game shows this weekend, and it being run by Ember who had made Total Chaos last year such goofy fun (the hosts do make the game shows, don’t’cha know), I elected to follow suit.
Hosted in the university’s big cinema lecture theatre, it did get off to a bumpy start with an inability to get the wi-fi working meaning they had to use a saved offline version of the game that lacked full interactivity. Naturally, though, Ember rose to the occasion, and soon volunteers in two teams of four were buzzing a rubber chicken or donut, answering the trivia questions (mostly G4 ones) and, if answered correctly, dispelling one of twelve cutie marks covering the image and earning a guess of the pony pun-ified phrase! It’s fun being an audience member and trying to work it out as you go along, even if that can be frustrating when they don’t crack what everyone else has. The best phrase, accompanying Brittania holding a bee with Rarity reflected in her eye, “Beauty is in the eye of the bee holder”, for instance, was fully revealed and still not guessed correctly, until it was opened to the audience and my friend Dodj nabbed it, earning himself a small prize. That was a nice thing!
Yeah, I'm not even gonna pretend AJ or I remember what this one was. Something involving a Wonderbolt crashing on the academy plains, I don't know. With Brittania involved, of course, because they all had her.
My memory for the next stretch is a little muddled here – I know I browsed the stalls a bit, but I didn’t get anything – and that’s largely because, as I was still mentally adjusting to the level of self-maintenance a bug like this needs, I neglected to sufficiently hydrate. Thus, during the next panel, I had one of the thankfully few bad episodes of temperature regulation (fever type symptoms, you know), and had to dash to the toilet so I could thus re-hydrate (as opposed to because I was bursting). Physically, this panel and the surrounding timeframe was definitely my lowest point of the weekend, and the stretch where my enjoyment of the con was notably diluted by this. The only stretch, I can at least say.
The panel, by the way, was a G3.5 one by one of the main con runners, Jez. Something I probably would have passed on were many of my friends not there and were I feeling better, and not in need of something rather mindless. It basically amounted to Jez running through the plot of the 44-minute G3.5 DVD movie Twinkle Wish Adventure (the last pre-FiM material in the franchise, this came out on October 13th 2009 – the FiM opener was already in production by then, dear lord), in a rather dour style. Not an unenthusiastic one, necessarily, you could tell he was genuine in unironically enjoying it. And he conceded a lot of points, not least the weird animation. Though this being better than the G4 movie, yeah, no.
That said, whenever it came to remark on the kinds of passive-aggressive character decisions/dialogue that do stillpop up in such sanded-off babysitter fare (as this involved G3 Scootaloo breaking protocol and revealing the wishing star early, her and G3 Sweetie Belle lying over and over to the amusingly snobby Mayor to stall, and the other five heading to recover the star from a dragon that stole it, which is cute and cuddly even as she’s hoarding the wishes, there was a bit of that!), it was entertaining enough. He was helped by playing the music videos for the special’s songs, and thanks to the subtitles, we were singing along to them. The songs weren’t abysmal either, least in that context; generic feel-good friendship pap, goes without saying, but the tunes were upbeat enough and some minor care had been lavished on them.
He did massively mistime his presentation (a joke “no questions now” panel probably didn’t help) and ended up just putting the special on proper for the back half (this was when I had to leave briefly), and while I’d never watch it normally (everything I’ve seen of G3/3.5, I had to do so via reactors, not raw), it was tolerable for this context. It got cut off at the last third due to panel time, and at this point, after the usual 15-minute interval around the stalls and with the bog break, I split from the rest for a panel I had a rather unusual reason for checking out: MLP Fever’s “Which Pony Are YOU?” I’m a moderate fan of her channel, though more for the discussion videos than the toy videos that she started out with and which she’s returned to more recently. So even though these kinds of personality quizzes are rarely my thing, I figured I’d give it a go.
I'm a Gen 2 personality type, apparently…? 'Often forgotten but no less special in my own way'? That is… not the description I would have picked, though I suspect enough folks might concur with this.
In retrospect, while it wasn’t a waste of time or anything, had I remembered that she already stated the quiz would be uploaded on her channel later (try it for yourself), I likely wouldn’t have gone to this. Questions bouncing off the toy collecting were tricky to answer, as were enough others that I had to settle for privately splitting the answer even though Cleo (MLP Fever) and OkamiGirl64 said you couldn’t do this. That said, they kept the tone lively and upbeat, kept the pace on track, had funky questions throughout that ranged from pastimes to interest to food to what you would do in certain situations and so on. And the rounds were well calibrated to the questions, from the generation personality to the pony personality (this I got Twilight Sparkle in a landslide) to… well, I’ll let the deliberately weird “Which weird MLP toy are you?” round speak for itself.
This was on a tie, so thank goodness I was able to choose the other one instead. Which was "Silly Face Pinkie Pie", and no less accurate in claiming 'You are that silly but lovable friend! Any mention of food or a party gives you the energy you need to get through the day.’, but at least it wasn’t disturbing…
The panel finished early enough that I joined the end of Ace and Zenfox’s Transport Ponies panel (more friends from our group), which I’d been okay with skipping as it was little changed from prior years. That said, it’s a very useful, informative one, laying much useful groundwork on how to travel effectively (especially for me who remembers little about best use of transport in the UK). Pretty useful life lessons, and not just for the con! I still don’t really understand some running joke about cake in this, but it was at least the fun kind of warped weird. And as they have plans to massively revamp it for its next appearance at Griffish Isles 2024 (with UKPC 2024 to follow thereafter), it was an appropriate sendoff.
Their panel went over due to starting late off technical difficulties, but as the next hour had no panels at all beyond the regular Britannia Buddies (for con newbies who are a bit shy), that was okay, for I’d done enough stall browsing earlier to finally pick out some things I wanted to get. The 2023 con t-shirt being the first lock: it’s quite different from the chalk outline of the 2019 Seaquestria or the graffiti style of last year, but the 80’s colours against grey background, plus other signifiers of that decade in leg warmers, made it one I liked enough. I also gave my first spin at the tombola, and won on my 2nd of five tries, gaining a G1 lunchbox I wasn’t sure what to do with, but held onto for now. I picked up a small gift for someone else, and checked out the charity auction donated lots in preparation for tomorrow, and following some further re-energising (by now I had well dug into that day’s rations of sweets), it was 4:15pm and time for the main event: the Voice Actor Script Reading and Q&A on the main stage!
Sunday was where Elley-Ray really took off as the wild force of nature she’s become known for, but even here, with her multi-layered wild dress and attire, she lit up the stage. Though Kelly was plenty dazzling on her own; she even felt like Starlight, and not just from her own speaking voice being close enough.
It would have been foolish to expect this year’s reading to top last year’s, but truth be told, I don’t think I can say it was more than diverting. Similarly, it was a skit with the characters the two VAs played (Starlight, Mistmane, Grandma Figgy from G5) and Brittania (Laura Kay once again), designed to still have friendship morals but be a bit more bent and kooky about it than the show. And Starlight getting in over her head, because of course. Elley-Ray did enliven it by voicing an onion with a rather meme-tastic origin, but honestly, I can’t remember much more.
That turned out to be surprisingly okay, because the Q&A rocked. For starters, all the growing pains the organisers had last year were smoothed out, between no inappropriate questions, a healthy balance of typical but earnest ones and those that were actually interesting, minimal rambling, and the actors balancing the extra tidbits. I didn’t feel up to going up with a question of my own, not as I was nursing a need to check the plumbing in the last 20 minutes, but the variety of answers were solid. Being able to belch on command is pretty helpful for children’s cartoons, as it happens! Elley-Ray almost got the role of Opaline and had three callbacks, and treated us to her rendition of the character. It was a pretty standard sort of low, silky rasp for a cartoon villain, but I don’t hesitate in preferring it to the Opaline we got (though that’s more on the voice direction than Athena Karkanis’ take).
She also stated that Opaline was a white tiger and not a pony at an early stage, which… well, she did say things that were known fabrications later in the panel, but this had none of that tone, so as incompatible as it sounds with the pony-heavy focus of this gen, it would fit for there to be lots of second-guessing behind the scenes… In any case, despite being restricted in direct-show questions off playing such minor, kinda-low-on-personality characters (when she recounted details of Mistmane’s tale from “Campfire Tales”, I didn’t remember half of it), she was energetic enough. She also said great things were coming at the end of G5, that she barely knew herself due to confirming they get little context beyond the scenes they play. Eh, I’m sceptical, but I admire the positivity.
As for Kelly Sheridan, for all that I am often not happy with a lot of the writing decisions as regards Starlight, she totally embodies the character both as a good yet recklessly impulsive supporting player, and as a manipulative villain with an agenda. You can guess how pleased I was to hear her say she preferred, however marginally, that Starlight, off how rare that kind of villain is to play (really, only the original Discord is comparable, everyone else is more given to being openly bad and snarling/laughing a lot). And unusually, when the topic of favourite seasons came up, after the expected dancing around with “I love them all” and a (relevant) side tangent of how all the visual and audio additions make the episodes so different to what they record that she’s able to enjoy them irrespective of judging how well she performed that week, she actually said the early stuff was special for getting the ball rolling and said the first or second season. Heh, not quite my “the writing hadn’t started slipping reasons”, but I’ll take it! We were also treated to her resurrection of her Twilight audition (she’d auditioned for almost every character across the 4 seasons before Starlight), which kinda just sounded like Starlight doing a Twilight impression, but it made me smile.
Now this is more like it! I don't think I'm as much a Twilight type as I used to – my craving knowledge in a manner to her was more of a Teenager Ghost Mike thing – but a lot here is close-ish. Not the kind of MLP fan so affected by Twilight speaking to me as to weep, but I do love her for a reason. And only slightly less as an alicorn too. 
Next time, in Part 2 (of 3): Two laugh riot quality ponifications of classic British game shows, a pair of late-night events testing the power of sleep deprivation, and an animation panel tailor-made for a certain someghost.
when Hasbro lied, ponies died :(
Ironically, if I had taken your advice and had managed to check in, I probably wouldn't have lost my bag, because I wouldn't have had so much luggage in the pub
Was that the part where I said "Yes"
The fact that it was a G3.5 panel was a complete coincidence, I'm sure
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Moral of the story: listen to your guardian ghost, for he knows best. 👻
In any case, considering they asked for your name when we were checking in (they already had mine, obviously) but no ID of any sort, had you g e there early, and it came to that, you could have said you were me and “my friend will be along later” and made up a name if asked, or given yours as mine. Several possibilities present themselves!
Moot stuff in the end, of course. Did you replace the few items you lost from the bag that you didn’t recover?
Every part was, so this doesn’t narrow it down much!
But most probably. I’m sure I said the word there too, if only as part of a sentence rather than the whole thing.
I mean, I did state above that had I been healthy, I likely wouldn’t have stopped by the panel at all. I mentally needed to be with friends then, and not alone. And it was a simple, minimal-brain-cells-engagement thing too, which helped.
…You are free to interpret that as a back-handed compliment. I am neither endorsing not condemning that reading.
Glad you were able to catch a lot of the con despite the health bumps!
In case it helps, my own personal "must not get sick this week" tactics are to increase my fruit and veggie intake the week before (also including cheater half-measures like juice and regular vitamins) and to mask religiously in any kind of public space.
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My food intake at home is pretty healthy as it is, but I'll bear in mind to possibly double down on it next time.
I had employed measures this year after last time, and evidently they mostly worked, given I only got it at the last possible minute. Literally only went out once in the build-up, so I guess I know where this came from…!
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Hope next year goes even better.~
Might be skipping ahead, but any 'con plague' get you the days after?
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Least it’ll be an anniversary that’s honest, leaned into and distinct from this one!
Good news there: no con crud! Just recovering from this, and given I eat my breakfast slowly while working from home for the first hour anyway, my week is very conducive to easing out of such a thing. By Friday, I was fully out of it.
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Always a good thing to dodge.~
Well, given the last MYM episode, this seems all the more plausible.
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I have not yet had a chance to re-elaborate on this point publicly with this new info, but yes, the end of MYM has certainly made this early non-pony iteration of Opaline all the more likely….!