Patreon issue: sponsors, please check your email for receipts (and assorted car, bugs, submarine, and calendar State Of The Estee blog entries) · 8:27pm Jan 10th, 2023
There's a lot to cover in this blog, especially given the date. January 10th. The last month has been filled with dark anniversaries, and I can feel the calendar trying to club me across the back of the skull. In a way, I'm mostly writing this just to get my mind off a few matters -- or at least, to get them out of my head and onto the screen.
This doesn't actually work, but it's supposedly some kind of entertaining to try.
Shall we?
So let's start with the Patreon problem. Back in December, when we were talking about the loss of the car, I said that at the time I went into the repair shop, six pledges were missing. And not to worry, because they usually all came in before the end of the month.
They didn't. Four of those December pledges outright vanished. They were never collected, and both names and numbers were removed from the site's rolls. This means I have no way to tell who those people are at a glance, because Patreon took the entries off until something was collected. I also can't contact them, because A. I don't know who they are and B. Patreon's code automatically deletes their contact information (until collection) as well. And this has all taken place without a corresponding number on my Notifications bell, which would tell me if someone had actively decided to pull their pledge.
For January, those four people are still missing, and two others have joined them. Still no Notification lights.
So what happened? I can only guess -- but the most likely possibility is that a payment method expired. If Patreon is linked to your credit/debit card and that ran out at the end of last year, then the pledge collection bounced. And the reason I didn't say anything before now? Because I've had bank-stalled pledges come in two days before the end of the month. I wanted to let the system run its natural course.
Because those sponsors would no longer see anything on Patreon itself, I need to try and contact them here.
And how do we figure out who's having problems? That much is easy. Whenever Patreon collects, a sponsor receives an email receipt. So if you're sponsoring me through that site... please search your inbox.
If you're a sponsor and you have no Patreon receipt for December? Then you're one of the four. No receipt for January and you're possibly one of this month's additional pair. If that's the case, just check to see what your current payment method is. Something may need updating.
Should you update before the end of the month, your January pledge should be collected in time. The December ones, for those four people, are effectively lost. If you want to, that amount can be sent to my Ko-Fi instead -- but that's at your discretion.
And that's about it for the direct fiscal portion of our program. However, one more time, because I've been on this site for a while and some people still don't know I have either page:
Patreon (per one-shot story/longform novel update sponsorships)
Ko-Fi (tips and 'something exploded')
Hopefully this reaches at least one of the people I was hoping to contact. It would help the month immensely.
It's already been a long month.
So let's wrap up the car. Dispose of the corpse, as it t'were.
Disposal was most of the problem.
In a previous blog, I said that I'd given up on using it as an emergencies-only vehicle until the insurance ran out. And the reason for that? Because I had no suspension left and was relying entirely on the front brakes. It's never just about you on the road: it's about everyone around you. If one more part failed, I would have been the emergency for any number of drivers and pedestrians. Imagine if it turned out to be a fatal one.
So I gave up. I pulled the insurance, then went online and started hunting for a scrapyard which picked up because I didn't trust the car to reach that either. Turns out there are several sites which make contact with such operations for you. Fill out a questionnaire online, be utterly honest about the state of your car, and they'll quote you a scrap price. Someone will be by to pick up your car, possibly before the end of the day.
I went with The Clunker Junker for the most basic reason: they had the highest offer. And I'm only linking them because they're just an intermediary and the rest of it wasn't their fault.
The website said contact would be made within a day -- but typically, three hours or less. That put me in freeze mode because I would need to be on-site with the car in case anyone could come by quickly. So I stayed home. In fact, I stayed home for the next twenty-seven hours, and no one called me. Reaching out to the website's staff got me the name of the actual scrapyard: calling them produced either endless time on hold or the six ring all-lines-are-busy hangup. By the time I got through, I'd lost the extra day and the weekend -- because they couldn't come to pick anything up until Monday.
And then the scrapyard forgot about Monday.
Then there was a makeup appointment.
Then they were four hours late...
The tow truck driver was utterly courteous. He inspected the car, made sure I'd been telling the truth about its condition, and then paid in cash on the spot. The Cobalt moved onto the flatbed under its own power, and that was after I'd warned him about everything. Several times. And then it was gone. It is, in fact, being scraped. Some parts may serve as organ donor material: gawds know the alternator and most of the exhaust system are pretty new. But it won't be sold to anyone else.
If you're wondering what happened to the money... I got a prorated partial refund on my insurance. (I paid six months at a time: there's some savings on the total as compared to monthly.) I added some of the scrap value to that, then froze one complete six-month payment. This way, if I do find a car, I can insure it immediately. The majority of the remaining scrap payment was also frozen: it's a deposit towards my potential jury duty travel expenses. Leftovers turned into some groceries and the trip to the bank required for depositing it all.
The car is officially gone. Grocery shopping is now a full-day, multi-mile trudging ordeal. It's hard enough when I'm healthy, and January makes that worse.
So naturally, I got sick.
It's the flu, I think. (The covid test was negative.) Mild to moderate case, and the worst part has actually been the sore throat: this has come close to the point where I can't swallow at all, and my voice was compromised. (I sneeze-coughed while writing this: hot awl down the windpipe.) There's been a few days of that. I even know exactly who to blame, because he was merrily coughing his way through the supermarket parking lot just before I came up ill.
Having the sore throat as the harshest aspect has been weird. But it's also complicated matters, because my area seems to be going through a major respiratory illness surge. How can I tell? Many of the relevant OTC medicine sections are empty. I had to try and find something which would relax my throat enough to swallow liquids (and it's pain, not weakness -- yes, I did think about myasthenia, in fear). Which meant that this morning, while sick and moving on a bad foot, I went through several walking miles to come up with -- lozenges. And I did that after the first box wasn't strong enough to help. All I found was a spray where you're supposed to spit out the liquid after fifteen seconds. Given that the pain is all the way down, I'm not sure how I'm supposed to manage that.
I think walking around in cold air for several hours did more to ease the pain than anything else.
(Yes, I kept a mask on in all stores. I'm trying very hard not to kill anyone.)
But it's been a reminder of how hard it can be to operate in this area without a car. And when it comes to finding a replacement...
In a previous blog, I mentioned that used car prices in my area have gone insane. 148,000 miles? That's $10,500. I've seen used SUVs (probably coming off lease) in the $30k range. It's reached the point where I saw a car in my own neighborhood with a For Sale sign in the window, where the only other information displayed was 123k, and my first thought was That's a little high for a Kia.
New cars can be cheaper than used. (I'm serious. New Hyundai hybrids start at $25,000 before taxes and fees.) But my bank isn't giving me a loan any time ever, the interest rate on a local car loan is 7% anyway...
No, I'm still not insane enough to try and Ko-Fi or GoFundMe for a new car. (My current Ko-Fi goal is a general winter travel fund, in case I do have to get somewhere in a hurry.) But I have been keeping an eye out for anything which might be usable, because the winter is already demonstrating how harsh the local wheel-free life can be. And that brought me to the Honda.
I saw it in one of the local used car lots, just a couple of weeks ago. It had a sign hanging from the window, and I looked at it from the sidewalk which bordered the lot.
2004 Honda Accord
54,000 miles
$2400
Runs Good
This is not the sort of sign which fills a prospective buyer with confidence.
First off, let's look at that model year. It's twelve months older than the Cobalt, and it turns out that the Chevy was quite literally rotting out from under me. And now I'm supposed to take on a vehicle which has more age?
That mileage. Really? It's nineteen years old and was driven for less than three thousand miles per year? Tell me another one. And then there's 'Runs Good'. I should demand fifty dollars off the price for 'Runs Good' alone.
But -- let's face it. That's my price range. (With a lot of help, but still.)
It's just that the Little Old Lady From Pasadena Sea Isle City, who only drove her car to church on Sundays and occasionally spun out in the sand for fun, is kind of a myth. In a local used car market which typically has a ground floor in the $6k neighborhood, this was a $2400 car. Something had to be wrong.
So I walked on by.
The first time.
The second visit was at night. I had insomnia: night walks don't help, but they at least give the insomnia a few places to be. And the lot has no gates or fencing. Come in and look at any time.
Of course, it was dark.
I went around the car's perimeter. Some minor scratch and dent damage. No major external parts missing. There was a dark lump on the back seat: either something had tilted forward or the dead body was slumping oddly. But it was too dark to see the odometer, much less get a true survey of the interior. All I could really do was push down on the hood and trunk, trying to feel how much resistance I got -- and then see how quickly the car sprang back to a level plane.
Not very. Possible suspension problems, then. And I'd just learned how expensive those were to repair.
Still... $2400 base...
I made one more trip: in daylight, well before the lot would have opened. And I brought my tablet along, because I have a dumbphone and its photo capacity is limited to Yeah, Right. The intent was to get a picture of the VIN, then waste some money on Carfax and look up the car's history. It would probably just put me down by twenty dollars or so, but -- at least I'd know what I was up against.
Presuming I could find the VIN...
In daylight... the scratch and dent damage wasn't that bad. The dark shape on the back seat turned out to be a spare tire. (So possible mounting damage in the normal storage area.) The interior didn't look horrible. And the VIN...
I got lucky. VIN locations aren't exactly standardized, and not all of them are readily visible from the exterior. As it turns out, the VIN on a 2004 Honda Accord is at the lower base of the windshield on the driver's side. There's a clear rectangle embedded within the tinted area. It makes the VIN easy to see.
Which also meant that I got a clear look at where the VIN had been removed.
No ID number. Just a strip of blank adhesive.
I looked at it for a few seconds. Moved around the lot. Every other car for which I could find the VIN display area had a VIN on display. It was only the Accord.
And there are legitimate reasons for a car not to have a VIN -- well, reason: singular. If the car is so old that it predates the ID system? Possibly no extant VIN. It'll be issued one when you register your new purchase with the state.
This VIN had been removed. And to me, the most likely rationale for doing so seemed to be 'because the current owner really doesn't want the next one looking up its repair & accident history'. Or true ownership, because there is a crime called 'receiving stolen property' and I probably would have found out about it when I tried to register the vehicle. Incidentally, when said stolen property is confiscated? No refunds.
As the chat server pointed out, the only stronger Stay Away sign would have been if the car had actually been on fire.
I left the lot.
As of this morning, the Accord is still there. (I passed it while searching for medication.) But there's been a change.
The For Sale sign is no longer posted.
The cabin fever started early. I can only reach what I can walk to (and that bad right heel is not improving) or access via mass transit. The inability to travel makes me want to travel, because that's how the human mind is rigged.
Also, when I was out of the apartment, I wasn't being eaten alive.
Let's talk about the bugs.
That was most of December, and went into the earliest part of January. There's a tiny chance that I've got it solved (although I'm not sounding All Clear until I get through a full month without fresh wounds), and I still couldn't tell you what I was up against because I never got the things identified. I don't know what they are -- were? -- or how they got in, although I have suspicions on that last. Best guess is that my last mega-hike to try and find shoes either went through the wrong plants, or dealt with an unsanitized shoebox.
I never matched the bite marks to anything online, and I only saw the bugs twice -- which at least tells me what they weren't. They were not bedbugs. (I tried all of the anti-bedbug tricks, and none of them worked.) What I had was a thin black line with a land speed more appropriate to a cheetah. And they found a place to hide in my bedroom, and then they started biting. Me. At night, over and over. I was taking a dozen or more injuries per attempt at rest, and the results were like oversized mosquito bites: double the area, but standardize the itch.
I tried sleeping in my mother's bed. Starve them out. After three nights, they found me.
We had that extended deep freeze. I vented the entire apartment. Hello, 9F overnight lows. Go ahead and survive that. And I nearly won, because I had about a week without bites and then -- well, I guess the eggs from Generation One hatched.
The herbal repellent worked wonders. To wit, they started biting me on whatever portion of skin hadn't been sprayed.
This went on for weeks.
And y'may be wondering why I didn't just go and fogger-bomb the place, or hire an exterminator. Well... first off, I don't deal well with chemicals. I'm that person who can nearly asphyxiate from using standard bathroom cleaners. Bombing the apartment would mean potentially facing several days of illness.
Second? Apartment building. If I'm going to detonate a toxin, I have to tell every other unit and arrange a good time for everyone, because we all have to be clear of the area for at least two hours.
And third? Two of those units are occupied by my landlord's relatives. I notify them, and it gets back to her. There's a non-zero chance of Consequences. Same for hiring an exterminator -- and y'all can look up the cost for that on your own.
I didn't even know what I was trying to kill, and foggers can be species-specific. If I got the wrong product, the bites would just keep coming.
But after nearly a month of the war, I caved. I picked up the Bloodsucker Combo Pack: targeted multiple species which fed off humans. Told the entire building, and I'm still waiting for Consequences to land. Bombed, got out of the area, came back after two hours, opened the windows, got out for two more hours, got constantly rained on, and then had a long gastric crisis because I don't deal well with chemicals and hello, toilet. For the fourth time today. And I did so much laundry that the washer leaked once -- and then didn't do so again. So that panic attack is on hold.
But there's been no fresh bites for several days. The old ones are finally healing. I'm starting to sleep a little better, because trying to get through the night when you're waiting for the attack isn't easy. But I'm not in the clear yet. Still waiting.
And then I caught the flu.
Cabin fever.
We had that one extended cold spell in the area. There was also a single day in the low 60s, and I went to the beach.
I can do that, if I get the right combination of trains. Hit the shore towns, walk next to the Atlantic for a while. But I wasn't going in the water. I went to go see a whale.
It's at the state militia museum, which is one room: the Whale takes up most of it. It is two tons of iron, and the weight is immediately apparent upon touch. (You can touch it.) I kept waiting for it to collapse its supports. It's meant for going under the water and I could readily see how it would do that without issue: it's just really hard to picture how it's meant to come up again.
The museum opened up part of the bottom. You can peer inside. The first thing you see within a solid iron interior is a two-man hand crank, because this thing was built in 1866 and it had to move somehow. Your operating options are Turn or, if Turning has worn you out, Die.
Rumors claim the inventor liked to take his family on riverbottom tours in this thing. All abroad the USS Darwin Award.
The Whale is one of the first subs. I wanted to see it because there's been some curiosity regarding a line I dropped in DELWMG: that Mazein had reached the initial stage of mechanical underwater exploration, and it was mostly a matter of finding those insane enough to go. I wanted to see what the minotaurs might have been working with.
The Whale is terrifying.
It's a rather subtle sort of horror. It exists as two tons of black iron NO. One look at it tells the viewer that this thing is not supposed to be under the water. Anywhere near water. It might make for a rather fine anchor -- once. Or an even better coffin.
They were brave in those days. Or slightly insane. As with heroism, the two are often confused.
A month of dark anniversaries.
Last time at home.
Last trip to a rehab center.
Last day with words I spoke directly to her, when she still might have heard.
Last hours before intubation, and the oxygen didn't reach her in time.
Two years ago today.
I've... commented about it. How so much is in the chat server, in the #medical channel. That it's -- useful for me, in a way. I don't expect the lawsuit to do anything, and haven't for some time -- but hey, any time I want to review events, refresh my memory before potential testimony -- there's the archives. Backup recollections. On January 10th, it becomes hour by hour. Then minute by minute. And here's where I was when the neurologist finally called with the scan results. The ones which proved brain death. And now I'm on the way to the hospital for the last time. In a couple of hours, I'll be signing the comfort care paperwork. Then I'm outside her room, followed by going within to speak when there's nothing left to hear me, and...
...at 7:04 p.m, she dies.
I can review that any time I like. On bad days, in a month filled with dark anniversaries, I reread all of it. No aspect ever changes, and it always ends the same way.
Two years.
A week ago, I saw a woman who shared her rough nose shape. And because this is the dark month, I cried for three minutes.
Two days from now was the funeral.
I've looked at the interstate buses. The local ones in that area. I can't get any closer to her grave than twelve miles.
I can't go see her.
...I just want to get through this month.
I want all of us to reach spring.
*hugs*
I can feel for you. It's been five years now for me, and I still look across the street in the mornings, wishing she were still there.
🌼
Voice Of Experience
The days your parents die are a milestone on your path to Officially Old. It is NOT a Happy Time.
My condolences.
Sea Isle City! Are you a fellow person originating from the shore?
We are still here.
Here’s where I extol the virtues of a car-free lifestyle: how freeing it is to hop on your trusty bicycle to buy groceries, wander through the river valley, or see the sights downtown! I’m aware that’s location dependent however; Jersey seems to be mostly a car dependent suburban hellscape. That can be deceptive sometimes, nobody would imagine a gritty industrial city in the Frozen Wastes of Northern Alberta would have awesome year round bike infrastructure but I’m living it in central Edmonton. Maybe parts of Jersey are the same way?
Not sure how you should run your life from here but owning another automobile seems like it would end up owning you right back. Hoofing it everywhere doesn’t seem practical long term either. What else are ya gonna do, roller-skate?!
5708179
Voice Of Experience
I grew up outside a REALLY small town in western Pennsylvania. There were no sidewalks never mind bikepaths. Trying to ride a bike in the clear dirt beside a road without getting hit by a car. Going up a hill like that is worse.
Here in the USA, you ain't got a car the Powers That Be hate you & will do nothing to help you.
I think I updated my payment method in Patreon, but I'll double-check.
5708200
I’ve experienced that experience too, don’t worry! I have a bit of fitness (not an athlete or anything, just a normal dude), I can turn a wrench, and I live in a city where “Mayor Bike Lane” found the political will to take away my street parking (which I and MANY others miss) and build a big expensive bike lane instead. Not every place or every person is like that.
But the question needs answering: how to get around? Should Estee buy a big five person cage she totally cannot afford one way or another? Walk? Scooter? Unicycle? (while inevitably learning to juggle too, can’t do one without the other) Real world practicality of bicycle must be considered in context. Moving to a place where it’s just easier to move around might be another option, I don’t know how attached she is to her current home.
And checked my Patreon too, I seem to be good.
5708250
Well, when I moved to Phoenix (in 1987) I had a mountain bike. Buy the extra tough tires, go tubeless &,have them dump a can of Slime inside. (Here in Phoenix, cactus thorns are a problem.) You can fit 3 or 4 bike baskets on it.
Also got a damn good bike lock. Third time someone cut the rail it was locked to ( which voids the antitheft warranty) I gave up having a bike.
Here in the USA you mostly need a guaranteed income 3x your rent + good credit rating. You can get a place with no credit check. Count on paying a LOT more.
5708250
Theoretically, a motorized scooter, like an Aventura-X, a Honda Metropolitan, a Buddy 125, or a Vespa LX150, would be a decent solution; there's a lot fewer things that can break or go wrong with them, if nothing else, and small engines are (usually) cheaper and easier to repair if they do go wrong. Plus, I believe they typically get around 60-70 miles/gallon, so overall the cost of ownership ought to be significantly lower than a car.
In practice, though, you're still looking at around $2000-and-up for a decent secondhand one, and around $4500-ish for a brand-new one... and securing it could be a problem, especially if you live in an apartment where there's no controlled access to the premises or garages which can be closed up and locked at night. I'm not sure where Estee lives or what the crime rates are like in her area, but personally, I'd be worried about it getting stolen if it can't be locked up in a controlled space. And, alas, it doesn't alleviate the "need to get around in winter / bad weather" problem.
5708314
One of my friends from HS had a motorcycle. He said their are 2 groups of riders.
1) Them that have Hit The Road Jack
2) Those that ain't been down YET.
He also said that most accidents happen under adverse conditions. It's dark, raining or snowing, or, worst of all, they're on their cycle.
5708351
True, but a Vespa-style scooter is considerably less powerful than a full-size motorcycle. It's mostly meant for commuting around city streets at low-to-moderate speeds (30-40MPH, though some can get up to 55MPH), and the acceleration is fairly moderate as well; you're not going to be rocketing off the line from zero-to-60 in two-point-five seconds on one of those things, or taking them out on major highways or interstates with 70MPH+ speed limits. (Or at least, you shouldn't, though some people are undoubtedly crazy enough to try.) They also have a lower center of gravity due to the smaller wheels. So, all things considered, they're not nearly as dangerous to drive as a motorcycle.
5708468
True, but a major cause of in city accidents is "other driver didn't see you. " & smaller bikes just make it worse. But a motorized bicycle would help & it's worth considering. If it's small enough
Still, a Smalltoe is small enough to keep in your apartment. So are some of the other mopeds, although IDK how useful they'd be. Still, they're small enough you can put them on a bus' bike rack although weight could be an issue.
Googled it, riders say "...Especially for commuting do NOT buy without a test drive.".
5708485
The "Smalltoe" is not a real product; it's just a one-off by a Swedish inventor who wanted to set a record for "smallest rideable motorcycle." Aside from the novelty value, it's thoroughly useless and impractical (and again, not an actual thing you can just go out and buy), so I can't imagine why you'd even suggest such a thing...
Oh shit! I think I was one of the expired CCs on Patreon (I didn't realize *that* was the card I had linked to). My sincere apologies for the trouble. There should be coffees coming through to make up for it.
I’ve had motorcycles for forty years now, all 70’s Hondas. I have hit the road (Jack) a time or two, been pretty lucky overall. Good leathers pay for themselves if you oil them once in a while... Old bikes are a cheap and practical hobby but ARE a hobby, if you’re not keen on turning wrenches yourself they’re absolutely not for you. Old scooters the same but moreso. Weird one-off micro-scooters the same but so much moreso! New reliable scooter will cost well more than the $2,400 car Estee wisely passed by but might barely be able to afford. Scooters do NOT offer a safety advantage over full-size motorcycles despite the speed limitations, in my opinion, and are obviously very limited vs. longer trips. They’re a nice second bike for around the neighborhood but if you only own one motorcycle you might as well have a versatile and capable one. The legality of operating one without a license should not be considered a feature unless you have a DUI: take the course and get your bike license regardless, don’t be cheaping out on that. Neither are useful in winter; been there done that.
Assuming you’re reasonably fit and can mostly stay off major roads though (assuming!), a bicycle really CAN offer year-round practical transportation. With studded winter tires, fenders, decent lights, and bar mitts my pedal bike does everything I need it to do in my everyday life, my little truck only starts once a week or so. Kitting a bike up like that is sort of a hobby itself, you can’t buy one off the shelf and it’s not exactly cheap, but if your needs are modest and you situation conducive it’s the best transportation deal going.
5708641
Because it's what came up when I Googled "smallest moped".
5708678
(Because it seems like more and more often, it isn't. I don't know if it's because everyone's gaming the results with "search engine optimization" strategies, or if Google's algorithms have just gone too far in their attempts to be helpful with "did you mean to search for X", but it seems like you have to drill down to the 2nd or 3rd page of results to find anything actually relevant to what you really wanted anymore. 
)
And this is why we click on links and read the actual articles, instead of just assuming the first result Google gives you is actually useful or relevant to what you're looking for.
The Smalltoe is the "smallest motorcycle" only by the most technical of technicalities. Yes, it is motorized -- with a 0.3 horsepower, ethanol-fueled engine originally intended for radio-controlled model airplanes -- and yes, you can ride it, sort of, though you'd need to be something of a contortionist with an excellent sense of balance to actually get on the thing and maintain the riding position for more than a few seconds. But it has no steering, and no brakes -- not that it really needs the latter, since its top speed is about 1.3 miles per hour -- and certainly not a scrap of cargo-carrying capacity, aside from the rider themselves. It doesn't say what the range is, but looking at the photos, I can't imagine the fuel tank would even be large enough to carry you the full 1.3 miles even if you felt like spending an hour on the thing to get there.
5708666
Well, "around the neighborhood" was mainly the use I was thinking of; a small-ish moped or scooter would be something inexpensive (or relatively so, anyway) that could get Estee to the grocery store, pharmacy, or other nearby shops and back again. Obviously, it wouldn't be the best option for long trips, and it absolutely wouldn't be the way to go for, say, driving across state lines to get to a brony-con -- but for running quick errands within, say, a 5-mile radius of her apartment, it would be better than nothing, I should think.
A bicycle would certainly serve those short-errand needs as well -- although the last time I looked into it, the ongoing supply-chain screwups had jacked the prices way up for anything decent, if the shops even had one in stock or could get it in anything less than 3 to 6 months
, so there's that to contend with...
With so many people recommending you buy a motorcycle, a motor scooter, or a motorized bicycle, and other people (sometimes the same people) warning you about road safety issues with such vehicles, why hasn't anyone taken the logical next step and suggest you buy a small two-wheeler and mount ARMOR on it?
