Friendship is Card Games: The Cutie Mark Mix-Up

Ah, Dia de los Muertos. When better to remember bygone plotlines, or ponder questions of the soul? (Of course, this would’ve gone up earlier, but I spent much of Monday flying back home from Magic 30. I was too busy with card games for my card blog. )

I do love the giant ceremonial scissors. Given pony forelegs, it’s really more a question of how anything smaller might work. (Though this does seem like something the mayor should be doing, not the sheriff…)

Sunny, I know this is as much an earth pony testbed as it is a community garden, but you can’t just slap “of Magic” on everything.

Ah, a reminder of the surreal mutations the local wildlife has experienced since the days of Twilight Sparkle. “Assume a spherical rabbit” should not apply in real life.

I feel like the town shouldn’t need a special place to grow food. Well, it should, but I’d expect it to already have some that are much larger. I don’t expect every kids’ show to have a firm grip on logistics, but the G4 supply chain was a lot more clearly put-together.

So, is that Hitch’s special ceremonial sheriff hat that he only wears for special occasions, or a recent acquisition he’s trying out as a possible full-time addition to his uniform?

I’m lukewarm on “flora magic.” Make sure it doesn’t apply elsewhere—e.g. do Hitch’s communication abilities indicate a fauna branch?—before assigning what could be a misleadingly restrictive label. See also “float magic” for unicorn spellcasting. Goodness knows that has plenty of further applications beyond telekinesis.

“I call best spot!”
Ah yes, the one issue all community enrichment projects face: The community itself.

At least the squirrels are more normally shaped, if unusually colored.

Huh. Why was the smoothie cart that close to the garden anyway?

So… it’s been well established that earth ponies know how to use their magic, and in some cases, how to garden. Why are they just stomping mindlessly? Especially Posey? (Granted, she may just be doing it for the sake of catharsis.)

… Okay, Hitch getting them to stop and Sunny getting them to fix the damage only underscores that question. Is this just a limit of the animation budget? I feel like the original intent might have been a bit less… inane.

Izzy is wise. Neologisms are always cromulent; if no one knows how to use it, it must be correct!

“Get out of the way, us!”
It takes a unique mind to include yourself in a shouted command.

Huh. The episode title summary made it clear that this will have elements of “Magical Mystery Cure,” but we’re also getting a bunny stampede straight out of “Applebuck Season,” complete with inexplicably panicking ponies. Also, Izzy can autolevitate, and can even maintain the spell through a sneeze… if not her thrust vector.

Hitch raises a valid point. A panicking crowd isn’t likely to heed a single call for reason and order, regardless of species.

Ah, the flying rats of Zephyr Heights still exist. How horrifying.

Cloudpuff acting as an intelligence agent does seem in line with that one comic detailing his rich social life.

Ah. There are limits to Opaline’s power, which she cannot tolerate. Or, for now, circumvent. That was clear enough given al her scheming, but it’s good to know for certain.

I do appreciate Misty’s enthusiastic willingness to try accidents as a route to power. Very Cave Johnson attitude. She’s going to throw magic at the wall and see what sticks.

“Don’t get attached, Misty. It’s a sign of weakness.”
Because it’s not like there’s empirical proof that social bonds are a route to magical power the next town over or anything. Opaline truly believes in her ideology with the same zealous faith Twilight had in friendship, hence why she insists on espionage to determine what’s patently obvious. I have to wonder why and how she got such conviction.

Oh, of course the smoothie cart’s here. The grand opening of just about anything will generate a lot of hoof traffic. Sunny may be an idealist and an activist, but she still has a business to run.

“I shouldn’t be encouraging chaos and smoothies.”
Ah. It seems that even Sunny’s business isn’t as legitimate as I thought. Fighting the Man with blenders and bananas, apparently.
… Huh. Apparently I have similar sentiments as the Maretime Bay media.

Ah. We’re going for the standard Freaky Friday “No, I have it tougher” argument.

Hitch, Sunny knows exactly how hard you have it. Not only is she your primary sympathetic ear, she’s also the one you’ve had the most cause to arrest for years.

… So. I was expecting the Unity Crystals to be involved somehow, but apparently Sparky can sneeze out Star Swirl’s unfinished spell. Or possibly Starlight’s variant thereof.

Great job keeping the critters out of the Brighthouse, guys.

Oh goodness, they really are the pillars of law and chaos in this community. (Chaos in the sense of individuality and self-actualization, anyway.) And going by the personality changes (and Sunny apparently not being able to understand animals,) this is closer to the Bearded One’s Big Blunder.

Hmm. On the one hand, Hitch’s altered mark is right in front of Zipp. On the other, change blindness is a thing, and that’s the last thing she’d ever expect to change.

Ah. There we go… though it took a few moments more for the penny to drop than I’d expect. (I know, I know, it’s part of the joke, but still.)

Okay, I do like the snicker. There’s a five-year-old in all of us, and Zipp’s leaked out a bit as she spotted the “bottom” pun.

“I think I know what’s going on here. Bye!”
Wow, Zipp. Wow. An explanation might be appreciated. Yes, your hypothesis is unconfirmed, but it’s a lot better than the current uncertainty.

… Any particular reason these two feel the need to switch roles? Sunny was doing just fine. (Yes, Hitch didn’t have the right mindset to enforce public order, but I’d like to think he’d stand up for what’s right when it truly mattered.)

Welcome to Hell, Hitch. Also known as food service.

Oh, those aren’t squirrels, they’re raccoons. Aren’t they supposed to have horns?

Ah yes, Crab Rave 2: Carcinic Boogaloo
And once again, I have to feel that the animation is limiting the story’s ability to communicate the unfolding havoc. There didn’t seem to be the time or resources available to render torn cushions, shattered plates, and other destroyed materials in 3D.

Or maybe they are squirrels? I can’t tell at this point.

I do appreciate an overly specific product description. And I’m not even surprised that Cloudpuff would have his own line of pet treats. He’s the royal pet of Zephyr Heights; of course he has merchandizing deals.

Lead your shots, Sparky. Don’t pounce where it is, pounce where it’s going to be.

I honestly like Misty’s delivery of her part of the exposition. She’s clearly reciting something Opaline’s said dozens if not hundreds of times.
That said, Opaline knew about the Unity Crystals in the very last episode. I’m not sure what else she thinks might be generating that massive beacon of magic. It’s also bizarre how she seems to think that she can’t rule without her full power after seeing how ready ponies are to accept the divine right of alicorns. But that may tie back to her conviction in the individual will to power. She can’t bear to let an opposing philosophy stand as an obvious counterargument to her beliefs.

“I’ll do anything.”
That sentence has consigned entire worlds to the pyre, Misty. (Though it does beg the question of how cutie marks work anymore, both their acquisition and symbolic meaning.)

Oh hey, Spike plushie by Pipp’s bed. Delightful! And question provoking in its own right.

Nice to see Pipp and Izzy have an appropriate reaction to a soul transplant.

Interesting to see Hitch’s usual hidebound tendencies peeking through.

So… does the smoothie stand have a dedicated chunkifier, or is this mare just asking Hitch to reverse entropy?

Hmm. On the one hand, this is a deeply unreasonable customer base if they expect the new guy to behave exactly like the previous proprietor. On the other hand, it’s not like Sunny’s having any better luck with her crowd. (Also, interesting to see how Sunny maintained what little social standing she had before the return of magic.)

“My adopted son wouldn’t stop releasing gouts of uncontrolled transformative power during the argument, but I have no idea how I could have gotten Sunny’s mark.”
It’s honestly a miracle that these ponies remember to breathe throughout the whole day sometimes.

Once again, it’s unclear exactly where the menace lies with this critter stampede.
… Okay, the rat flying full-force into Zipp’s cheek with a punch sound effect provides some of the answer.

Heh. Nailed it without meaning to with my “pillars of law and chaos” bit.

“Maybe we both are good at what we do because of who we are.”
It’s a weird chicken-and-egg feedback loop. Personality shapes competence shapes personality. Especially when cutie marks get involved.

I do like the sheriff hat lying on the floor with its ear cutouts clearly visible.

Hmm. The resolution is more like “A Royal Problem.” Unsurprising, given how both follow the same general formula. Still, interesting to see the channels soul magic tends to flow in.
Also, I guess there needed to be three more ponies involved for Zipp to earn her horn.

Ah. I hadn’t considered the smaller prisbeam in Argyle’s lantern. What a convenient item.

“It’s about this tree that grows special crystals called ‘Elements’!”
It’s good to know the writers haven’t forgotten the setting’s roots. And I do wonder if this foreshadowing something. (Yes, the Tree of Harmony allegedly showed up in the movie. I’m not sure if I buy that.)

And the plot thickens… though it was pretty runny to begin with. Nice to see things gear up in the back half of the season, though it feels like the visual storytelling is running up against some technical limitations. In any case, let’s see what I can do with these concepts. Please bear in mind that new mechanics from The Brothers’ War (all one of them) are on the table:

Haven’s Informant 2W
Creature — Dog Rogue
Flying
When Haven’s Informant enters the battlefield, draw a card. If you don’t control a Noble, each other player draws a card.
It’s hard for any service to be secret given Haven’s ongoing love affair with the pegarazzi.
2/2

Riot Deputy 3W
Creature — Unicorn Soldier
Flash
Riot Deputy can block any number of creatures.
When Riot Deputy enters the battlefield, it gets +1/+0 until end of turn for each attacking creature.
“Okay, everypony, time to calm down.”
1/4

Above it All 1U
Instant
Target creature you control gains flying and hexproof until end of turn. If it already had either ability, return Above it All to its owner’s hand.
Even a few inches of altitude can make problems seem a lot smaller.

Spectral Squeaker 1U
Creature — Mouse Spirit
Spectral Squeaker can’t be blocked.
Disturb 4U (You may cast this spell from your graveyard transformed for its disturb cost.)
Magic’s return brought new life to old stories.
1/1
Squeaking Through
(U) Enchantment — Aura
Enchanted creature gets +1/+0 and can’t be blocked.
If Squeaking Through be put into a graveyard from anywhere, exile it instead.
The tales want to be retold, by themselves or through others.

Soul Swap 1UU
Instant
Exchange the text boxes of two target creatures until end of turn.
“Iteration 86: Subjects remain convinced new marks are their own. Clover refuses to help me further. Clever indeed.”
—Star Swirl, research notes

Left Speechless 1B
Instant
Destroy target creature or planeswalker with an even mana value.
Pipp’s jaw dropped, her mind blank. Even so, her phone stayed focused on the unfolding havoc.

Worsening Infestation 1BB
Sorcery
Create two 1/1 black Rat creature tokens with flying.
At the beginning of each end step, if an opponent lost 3 or more life this turn, you may put Worsening Infestation from your graveyard on top of your library. (Damage causes loss of life.)

Happy Accident 3R
Sorcery
Choose two at random —
• Discard a card, then draw two cards.
• Creatures you control get +1/+0 and gain first strike until end of turn.
• Happy Accident deals 2 damage to each creature and planeswalker your opponents control.
• Create a tapped Powerstone token. (It’s an artifact with “T: Add C. This mana can’t be spent to cast a nonartifact spell.”)

Exuberant Gardeners 4R
Creature — Pony Citizen
Trample
When Exuberant Gardeners enters the battlefield, each player sacrifices a land.
Maretime Bay approached the community garden with far more enthusiasm than skill.
5/4

Memory of Harmony G
Instant
You may mill two cards. Target creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each color among cards in your graveyard.
“Legends and fables can tell us much about our history. The trick is finding which bits are true.”
—Argyle, journal entry

Rain of Produce 1G
Sorcery
Rain of Produce deals 2 damage to each creature with flying. Create a Food token. (It’s an artifact with “2, T, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.”)
Sometimes the bounty does the hunting.

Habitat Disruption 2G
Instant
Create X 1/1 green Rabbit creature tokens, where X is one plus the number of spells your opponents cast this turn.
In planning a new space for ponies, Sunny forgot to consider who else might already be using it.

Tough Customers 4G
Creature — Pony Citizen
Whenever an opponent casts a spell during your turn, you gain 2 life.
Whenever you gain life, put a +1/+1 counter on Tough Customers.
Ponies are creatures of habit. Disrupting their routine rarely ends well.
3/4

Ceremonial Scissors 2
Artifact — Equipment
Equipped creature gets +2/+0 and has “Whenever this creature attacks, untap target land.”
Equip 2
With them in hoof, everything looks like a ribbon.

Prisbeam Channeler 5
Artifact Creature — Golem
Prototype 1G — 1/1 (You may cast this spell with a different mana cost, color, and size. It keeps its abilities and types.)
T: Add X mana of any one color, where X is Prisbeam Channeler’s power.
”Any power source can be exploited.”
—Opaline, the last alicorn
3/3

Disruptive Servant UB
Creature — Unicorn Minion
T: Target player mills two cards.
Whenever you surveil, untap Disruptive Servant.
All efforts to find more information on Opaline came up blank.
1/1

Opaline’s Infiltrator UB
Creature — Mouse Illusion
Skulk (This creature can’t be blocked by creatures with greater power.)
Whenever Opaline’s Infiltrator deals combat damage to a player, that player reveals their hand. You may sacrifice Opaline’s Infiltrator. If you do, choose a nonland card from that hand and exile it. As long as it remains exiled, you may cast it and may spend mana as though it were mana of any color to cast that spell.
1/1

Critter Corner GW
Artifact
If one or more creature tokens would be created under your control, those tokens plus a 1/1 green Rabbit creature token are created instead.
5, T: Create a 1/1 white Bird creature token with flying.

Opaline, the Constrained BGU
Legendary Creature — Noble Warlock
Alicorn (This card is also a Pony Pegasus Unicorn.)
Flying
Opaline, the Constrained’s power and toughness are each equal to the number of cards in your hand.
Each player’s maximum hand size is reduced by three.
*/*

Kitchen Crabs 1UB
Creature — Crab
When Kitchen Crabs enters the battlefield, each player mills a card. You gain life equal to the number of card types among cards milled this way.
Persist (When this creature dies, if it had no -1/-1 counters on it, return it to the battlefield under its owner’s control with a -1/-1 counter on it.)
2/3

Command the Wilds 4RG
Sorcery
Create a 3/3 red and green Beast creature token. Until end of turn, it gains hexproof, indestructible, and “Creatures you control get +2/+2 and have haste and trample.”
Miracle RG (You may cast this spell for its miracle cost when you draw it if it’s the first card you drew this turn.)

Comments

[Nitro Indigo]

Do we even see a mayor of Maretime Bay?

[Herald of Opera]

“Assume a spherical rabbit” should not apply in real life.

I disagree, and logic is on my side:

• Kirby is shaped like a friend.
• Kirby is spherical.
• Therefore spherical animals are friend-shaped and should definitely exist in MLP universes. QED.

It takes a unique mind to include yourself in a shouted command.

Not as unique as the one who said the quiet part out loud.

In any case, let’s see what I can do with these concepts.

Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Copies of spells will resolve before the original. Notably, this means that copying Above It All and not changing the target is all but guaranteed to return it to your hand (they can kill the target in response and the spell will fail).

Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Yes, the hand size reduction works on you and makes Opaline weaker. Considering she keeps being thwarted without the heroes even realizing she exists, a certain level of self-destructiveness is presumed.

[Daedalus Aegle]

Stellar Flare once said, "In the future all ponies will drink their fruit." In the distant time of G5 this grim prophecy has come to pass.

[Ghost Mike]

This was one of the better (or "better", as it were) episodes of this content drop, mostly owning to a higher number of pleasurable grace notes than most episodes. And the main conflict, while made out as an absolute hash as per usual, is at least just poorly written, rushed and imbalanced in the pacing, and not actively infuriating. Plus, the villains make progress, instead of just mooching about and kicking their heels.

Still, it makes A Royal Problem, an episode I don't like much at all (I recognise this is a minority opinion) look like alloyed gold. You also make a good point about the animals and chaos; having seen a few TYT shorts by now with critter chaos, where they're able to have much more visual momentum and tangible affect, even on their shoestring budget, it just shows how much this show is struggling to animate and present the bare minimum, in its chosen art style and aesthetic. Oh well, that's no one's fault, except Hasbro's for insisting on the series being CG. As we all know.

[Dustcan]

I’m lukewarm on “flora magic.” Make sure it doesn’t apply elsewhere—e.g. do Hitch’s communication abilities indicate a fauna branch?—before assigning what could be a misleadingly restrictive label. See also “float magic” for unicorn spellcasting. Goodness knows that has plenty of further applications beyond telekinesis.

It does give nice alliteration with flora, flight and float magic.

[Uz Naimat]

Hey, FoME, quick question. What’s the status on the Ancestral Tribute contest judging?

[iisaw]

I feel like the town shouldn’t need a special place to grow food.

Food comes from cans, every citiot knows that.

Ah, the flying rats of Zephyr Heights still exist. How horrifying.

Wait until you see the tarantulas.

It’s also bizarre how she seems to think...

Seems like the majority of people desperately seeking power are deeply and profoundly stupid, so I'm okay with Opaline being an idiot. Now if only all the other ponies weren't...

It’s honestly a miracle that these ponies remember to breathe throughout the whole day sometimes.

...yeh.

It’s good to know the writers haven’t forgotten the setting’s roots.

They just ignore them when inconvenient.

...the animation is limiting the story’s ability to communicate the unfolding havoc.

Yeah, it's easy to model and texture a nice cushion, but much harder to make a torn and dirty one. It's a shame, because even when there aren't scenes of disorder and destruction, it makes the world feel a little sterile.

[Pineta]

So… does the smoothie stand have a dedicated chunkifier, or is this mare just asking Hitch to reverse entropy?

Not such an unreasonable request, since it is clear the laws of thermodynamics don't apply to Equestria, but the concept is intriguing.

[_Undefined_]

I just now noticed that near the end of the opening, Izzy is effectively doing the Pinkie Pie pronk to the beat of the theme song.

"Dibs on this plot!" one of the background characters announces as he begins to scratch at the dirt. Thank goodness the show cut away before we could see how he intended to mark it.

Okay, I do like the snicker. There’s a five-year-old in all of us, and Zipp’s leaked out a bit as she spotted the “bottom” pun.

Is Zipp the first character to actually make a canonical butt joke about cutie marks? (I'm going to say that this technically doesn't count, as Pinkie doesn't seem to be aware of the joke.)

I honestly like Misty’s delivery of her part of the exposition. She’s clearly reciting something Opaline’s said dozens if not hundreds of times.

If I close my eyes and don't look at Misty's smiling face, I like to imagine that the voice actress is irritated at having to recite that blatantly expository line.

Thanks for turning to camera during the cutie mark re-reversal so the audience can confirm it's working, Sunny.

How are the animals supposed to get to the critter corner if the main characters are off doing something else at the time? Or is Sunny just going to leave the door wide open from here on out? Misty is going to have no trouble whatsoever sneaking in.

[Polychromatic]

"I can't believe Starlight fucked a dragon" was my initial reaction to the switch, from which logically followed "I can't believe they made StarSpike (Strike?) a canon ship".