"Have I been somehow drugged or something?" Rarity asked. "You had me kiddnapped and have then told me that my entire life so far has been a fake and my parents...my parents are undercover changeling agents, and I should be screaming in panic. Yet I feel strangely calm. Why?"
Queen Primary replied "Part of that is your Changeling hormones kicking in. Changelings feel calm when with members of their own hive. It's not magical or drug-related, it's a biological part of our own bodies that makes us less likely to argue and fight against each other within the Hive. Contrary to common Pony and Griffin belief about us, Changelings are not mere puppets in the hooves of their Queen. We are as individual as you ponies are. Nor do we survive solely upon love, unless we have no access whatsoever to other food sources because of war or disaster. And I think part of it is because a part of you has allways wanted to be royal or at least part of the nobility. You are more then nobility, you are Changeling royalty. And when I pass away you will be the new ruler of this Hive. Now, let me show you around it."
Rarity nodded and followed the Queen into the Hive, which was lit by glowing green stuff plastered on the walls that Rarity decided not to ask about, suspecting that it was something disgusting. "This was orginally a cave system, until we moved in and took it over, and expanded it with a lot of hard work. All Hives tend to be at least slightly different. Some from the outside look like towering mounds and make no attempt to hide themselves, they are deep in the Badlands where few or no ponies or griffins ever go. Others get set up in forests and wood plays a large part in their construction. Still others are so well hidden that they are almost impossible to find. Even when at war, no Changeling will inform on the location of a hidden Hive to those not of the Changeling race." Rarity marveled at the individal homes for each Changeling carved out of the rock, each one surprisingly large. Then they reached the centre of the Hive.
There was a deep well that glowed with a soft warm pink glow, so unlike the light of the rest of the Hive. It was guarded by two Changelings who held large haliberds with the magic from their horns. "That well is the most important part of the Hive; the Hive's love store. Our agents go out and gather love. peacefully if possible, they ten consome some of it and bring the rest back here and channel it through glands in their hooves, and we Hive Dwellers survive on it, along with fungus that we grow in the Hive, and on special occasions, meat as well. Without love, the Changeling eggs will not hatch; without love, the young Changelings will not grow healthy with strong carapaces. Until they are old enough to eat solid food, they depend on love alone. At the age of three we start teaching them basic skills...how to change shape and hold that shape, and how to gather love and what is expected of them.Without the guards, the love would be all be used up within weeks by greedy Changelings and the young ones would starve. Let me show you the egg chamber."
Rarity entered a room with about thirty or so head sized green eggs on the floor, but what she saw next horrified her. A pony and a griffin, both of them hanging in lightly glowing cocoons. "That's horrible! Please, cut them down and let them go now!"
"If we do that, the eggs will not hatch. And it's not as nasty for those two as it seems. The cocoon protects them from bedsores, numbness and the other problems of immobility. Other then cramp, but that would wear off within a short time.
As for suffering in the mind, they're not suffering at all. Instead, they think they are with their familes and have the jobs of their dreams. When we found them, the pony was homeless and living in misery, and the griffin had been mauled by a manticore deep within the Everfree Forest and it's wings had been torn off. The griffin was near death from blood loss. If we set them free, the griffin will most likely die within the hour,and the pony will be even more unhappy then before.Under normal circumstances we only kidnap other races to protect ourselves or to enable the eggs to hatch and feed the larvae. Many Queens will also have one or two coccooned ponies to feed on in their throne room, but it depends on the individual Queen."
"Oh, well in that case I'll leave them there for now," Rarity said. "But when the eggs are hatched I want the pony to be set free, unless he prefers being cocooned once he has had time to stretch his cramped muscles properly and get rid of the cramp. I hate it when ponies get kiddnapped."
"And now...the Royal Throne Room." She was shown into a well lit room with a beautiful throne of carved ebony. "This is where you will do our governing from when I have...passed away."
"I...I can't rule a Changling Hive. I have Carousel Boutique to run and my Rarity Orginals to make. And I am one of Princess Celestia's Mane Six and a holder of the Element of Generosity. Princess Celestia would never under stand and neither would my friends; they just won't understand, they'll think I've been kiddnapped or worse,and might even send the guards after me thinking I kiddnapped the real me." Rarity told her.
"You have to and I'll tell you why. My only other child, a son, is such a drone, and far too lazy and spolit to rule. And when the hereditary principal breaks down in our society, then it tends to be an ambitious general who takes the throne. Queen Chrysalis was once one of these generals. It is taboo to attempt a coup whilst a good Queen, a capable Queen, lives, but when she dies and there is no heir or no suitable heir, a general takes over, and such generals are likely to do bad things like large scale kiddnappings or even full scale invasions of other countries to secure the love that they need. As one of the Element Bearers and a Changeling Queen at the same time, you have a good chance of making peace between this Hive at least and Princess Celestia. She knows you so well and trusts you after all."
"All right, I will see what can be done." Rarity said with a sigh. "And I will accept the throne of this Hive, for the sake of all of Equestria."
While this a promising fic, just.............. solw down!
It seems too rushed and she's accepted responsibility as a queen far too quickly!
Just tone it down a bit and it'll be fine!
2172702 I tend to allways rush my fics.
Your spelling is terrible. With nearly all of today's word processors having a spell check feature, there is no excuse for that.
Also, as was mentioned in the previous chapter, the pacing is too rushed. Even with the calming effects of the hive, Rarity shouldn't be so quick to accept. I'm a sucker for "X is a changeling" fics, but so far, this is not shaping up to be one of the better ones. It's not beyond fixing, though, so I think I'll stick around a little longer to see where you go with it.
So… If Rarity and her ‘parents’ where changelings, then what about Sweetie Bell?
2172745 And so, you use that tendency of yours as an argument to continue rushing your fics instead of tring to correct it and become a better author?
I see what you did there.
But yea try to get longer descriptions and somewhat maybe little more about what she fell etc
so far, it's a good, although short, read, and I look forward to more.
Definitely needs to slow down a bit.
As much as happened in this chapter, you'd need another thousand words minimum for it to be good.
2172833 I want to get a fic done, it's so rare that I write anything nowdays. Would you like to help with the fic?
If I can, why not? But you need to know that I'm not that good in English. (It's not my home language, French is.)
But that can be a good practice for us too. (You to become less… "rushy", and me to become better in English.) I just hope you don't mind correcting every idea I give you, (and saying which error I have made were) that's the only way to help me progress.
2176632 Later on I'll PM you ideas for how to develop this and slow it down. At this very moment however real life is in the way.
2177186 No problem!
THREE WORDS!!
FEED OF SPIKE!
FEED OF SPIKE!!
2180630
...do you mean "Feed off Spike"?
218559
Exactly.
This story has only 2500 words, as far as it has progressed I think it should easily have double if not triple that number. We've gone from Rarity being normal to being kidnapped, being told her whole life has been a lie, shown around a changeling hive, accept everything the queen says, no Rarity like freak outs or any sign of her usual behavior through out any of this and than finally accepting responsibility to be queen of a bunch of bugs that just kidnapped her what feels like only 5 minutes ago. I'm going to track this because I'm a sucker for Mane 6 to changeling fics but this needs a lot of work.
2217538 well it makes sence for rarity to not freak out cuz there is something in her mined that when she is with her hive she's calm. But if it didnt say that part I'd be with ya.
bit too fast pace but still okay
3746722
Agreed, the general story is good, but it's progressing way too quickly and Rarity is just accepting things too easily. Almost as if this was written in a hurry.
4369725 remember the calm-ness thing
5108367
While I won't argue with the logic behind the reason for her being so calm, it just still feels to me as if it's being used as a way to progress the story without the conflict. Kinda like how so many HiE stories completely bypass the language barrier with "oh, we speak the same language, that's weird" or some simplified reason that just quickly solves the problem.
5125658 this is a very important point. and What about Sweetie Belle?
i Think in “they ten consome some of it and bring the rest back here” i Think you mean then not ten.
10176381
Yes.