Chapter 7: Breaking the Cocoon
Apple Bloom came to in a bright room, surrounded by familiar faces. Applejack, Cheerilee and a doctor on her left, Lyra and Bon Bon on the right. Blue-ish green walls beyond them, an open door leading to a hallway where nurses carted books and equipment around, it didn’t take her long to realise where she was. She moved to rub her belly, and found her hoof touching gauze that was wrapped around her tightly. No IV’s, no icepacks, and none of the adults looked especially relieved to see her.
Which begged the question: had she not been in real danger, or did nopony really care if she had? At this point, neither answer would have surprised her.
“I’ll leave you to talk,” the doctor announced, “she should be fine.”
“Applejack?” Apple Bloom asked as the doctor went out. “What happened? Are Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle here? Where’s Bastion?”
“We sent your friends home, we didn’t want them to see you like this. As for our son, he is in the room next door, recovering from the beating you gave him,” Bon Bon replied coldly. “And I’m sorely tempted a mind to return the favour, little missy.”
Lyra put a comforting hoof on her mate’s shoulder.
“Easy, Bonsy, why don’t we let her explain what happened. I’m sure there’s a reason.”
“Bastion came to me in the clubhouse. He said he was in charge of Chrysalis’ armies and then he turned into me. I thought he was there to replace me, to get to my sister or something. So I stopped him. And he got me just as bad as I got him.” Apple Bloom rubbed the now bandaged cut on her belly.
“He didn’t cut you that bad, Apple Bloom,” Applejack assured. “It didn’t go too deep. You passed out from the shock of seeing your blood and gettin’ so hyped up over nothing.”
“I’m surprised at you, Apple Bloom,” Cheerilee started. “It’s not like you to lash out a classmate like that.”
“Yeah, well… he had it comin’.”
“How?” Bon Bon asked. “What’s he done to deserve that?”
Apple Bloom snorted, looking at the four grownups ganging up on her.
“I don’t know. He just makes me angry, is all. It’s not my fault.”
Cheerilee wasn’t having any of it.
“Yes, it is, Apple Bloom. Bastion needs friends, he’s having a very hard time. Why can’t you be nice, like I asked you? Like your sister asked you? Don’t you think you should be nice to someone who’s lost his parents?”
Apple Bloom bit her lip and clenched her eyes shut as tears of rage started welling up.
“Why should I? My parents aren’t around either and nopony ever treated me special for that!”
Silence fell. Apple Bloom gasped when she realised what she’d just said.
“Wait, that’s what’s gotten you so upset? Ponies being nice to him because he’s…” Applejack asked. “Oh, Apple Bloom, why didn’t you tell anyone?”
“I shouldn’t have to tell you. I didn’t… I wanted to be nice to Bastion when he came around, I really did. But then just before he started going to school Miss Cheerilee had this big speech in class. She kept telling us how we were supposed to be extra nice and then you went and told me I had to make friends with him. I didn’t even know him, sis, you can’t ask that. It’s not fair to him or to me.”
“So this whole time, you were upset because of what we did?” Lyra asked, incredulous.
“Not you, or Bon Bon. But everypony else. You just showed him around town, introduced him, I know that. But Applejack, Cheerilee, Rarity, everypony else keeps treating him special, and I keep hearing how sad it is he’s lost everything, but he’s not sad. He looked happy whenever I saw him, and that didn’t add up with everything I heard. You made him look like a cheat because of what you did. Bastion never made a big deal about losing his family, he’s fine the way he is. You’re right: I shouldn’t be angry at him, I should be angry at you.” She shot Applejack and Cheerilee an angry look.
“Now hold on there,” Applejack interjected. “We were just trying to help make him feel better.”
“No, you weren’t. You just assumed he was miserable and you never thought to ask if maybe he wasn’t. Aside from Lyra and Bon Bon, I’m the only pony who cared about how he was feeling instead of how ponies told me he was feeling. You were all acting the way you were and saying those things when he was happy, but what are you gonna do when he does start crying? You don’t mourn on a schedule, you don’t get to decide when he has to feel happy or sad, and it’s not fair that you give him fake comfort when you should be making him feel like a normal pony.”
Apple Bloom panted and caught her breath. She idly wondered if that truth serum had subsided by now or not. Maybe Scootaloo had slipped her an overdose. Still, that pang in her chest started feeling better, so she kept on going.
“All you ever did was remind him of the bad stuff. Bastion has a family, they’re standing right there.” She pointed to Lyra and Bon Bon. “You keep treating him like he has to be sad, but he doesn’t. He should enjoy being happy while he can, and you're doing everything to stop him. And when it does finally hit him, he'll know that you don't care about how he feels, because you're gonna be doing the exact same thing you did when he was happy, and that's horrible. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle just did what you told them to, but that doesn’t help him make friends at all. It just makes him more alone. It’s not fair.”
Apple Bloom sighed, looking down.
“He’s happy now, and you shouldn’t act like he’s not.”
“This isn’t just about how Bastion feels, is it?” Lyra asked, wincing in sympathy.
“No, it’s not. I did want to be friends with him once I got to know him a little. He looked just like those old pictures of my family when he had his bees on him, and he looked really dedicated, I liked that. There aren’t any other foals around who are into farming or stuff like that, it was a relief. And I liked playing that game with him, at least he tried to keep it fair. He’s nice, and he’s smart. But every time I saw someone treat him special or talk about how I couldn’t say anything about him, I just got so mad inside. Every time I tried to get to know him, there was always something to make him look bad, there was always something that hurt me, and because I couldn’t say anything I never told him about it until it was too late. I thought it was him, but it wasn’t. It was because of you.”
“But what do you mean? What have ponies been doing to you, then?” Cheerilee asked.
“When that whole ‘Gabby Gums’ thing happened, everypony turned on me. No one went easy on me because of my parents. When Diamond Tiara calls me names, no one ever stops her, not even when you’re standing right where you can hear it. No one cares about my parents not being around, and I was fine with that until you started doing it for him. It’s not fair that you care about that for him and not me. And it hurts, it hurts so much.”
Awkward silence fell when the grownups realised what was going on. Apple Bloom tried to dry her tears as she got her frustrations off her chest.
“I got over it a long time ago. I was happy until he came around. But he’s in the same situation I am. His birth parents aren’t around, mine aren’t around either. But I’m happy, just like he is, and if you act like he should be sad, then that means I should be sad, too. You don’t know how much that hurts, to have ponies act like you haven’t dealt with things. It makes everything feel hollow and pointless, and it makes you feel alone when you do start feeling sad. And I guess… I just didn’t want to admit it was the ponies around me who were hurting me, so I pushed it down instead of admitting to myself what it was. I wound up taking it out on him.”
“That’s no excuse to beat the boy up, Apple Bloom, or poison him like you did,” Cheerilee protested. “For someone who says she wants to be friends, you certainly don’t act like it.”
“Yes, she does,” a voice came behind them.
Bastion was standing in the doorway, sobbing. His head had a bandage on it, with what looked like a cold compress pressed against a bump a little on the right side of his horn. Apple Bloom had stopped crying, but she had to rub her eyes to check if she wasn’t seeing things. Bastion hadn’t cried when she’d forced him to talk, so she’d just assumed – as had most of their class – that changelings weren’t capable of crying.
But hearing all this made him cry?
“Apple Bloom did like me. She’s not lying, she did want to be friends with me. And you made her hate me.” He looked accusingly at Applejack and Cheerilee.
“Sweetie, I know you want to be nice, but I think your brain might be a teensy bit concussed,” Lyra remarked.
“The one in my head, maybe. It’s not like I don’t have any spares,” the boy replied casually.
“Bastion, Apple Bloom was mean to you. That’s a sure sign she’s lying about wanting to make friends,” Cheerilee explained.
The filly's eyes went wide as the pieces of the puzzle fell into place.
“Not to him, it isn’t. You don’t just feel love or friendship, you feed off it, don’t you, Bastion? You don’t need to guess about friendship or love. You know when someone really likes you, it doesn’t matter how they act around you.”
The boy kept on glaring.
“You made her hate me. What did you say to her?”
“I just told her she should try to make friends with you after you came by my stand. I thought it might help if you made a friend your first day of school,” Applejack replied.
“I told everyone in class to be nice to you, to make you feel welcome,” Cheerilee replied. “It was just to help you make some friends.”
Bastion’s eyes went wide in outrage.
“T-That’s horrible! What did I ever do to you?”
Bon Bon slowly walked over to her upset son.
“Honey, calm down.”
“No, mom, I can’t. I was doing fine and they ruined it. Now Apple Bloom hates me and there’s nothing I can do about it. You’re just as bad as Chrysalis, both of you!” he shouted, before running off with Bon Bon in hot pursuit.
“What just happened?” Cheerilee asked.
Lyra rubbed her temples with her hooves.
“You forgot he can tell when someone’s faking friendship or love. We all forgot.”
Applejack and Cheerilee shot each other a quizzical look.
“He doesn’t feel when someone really likes him, he feeds off it. He either gets stronger or he doesn’t, he can’t read minds. But he knows the difference between someone acting nice and someone who wants to be friends. And you just said to his face you don’t think he can make friends on his own. He thinks you told ponies how to feel around him, not just how to act. And considering where he came from, that’s pretty harsh.”
“What? I didn’t mean that,” Applejack started. “And what does this have to do with Apple Bloom?”
“He was confused,” Apple Bloom concluded. “He knew I liked him, he must have picked up on it when he showed me his bees. He never felt me get angry at him, he just saw me acting angry. He didn’t know what was bothering me, he was scared to ask. And I was so frustrated I didn’t even know what for. I even started thinking he was using a spell or something. But it wasn’t his fault. It was never his fault.”
Apple Bloom gritted her teeth as she steeled her resolve. With a determined grunt, she got out of the bed and hopped to the floor.
“Where do you think you’re going?” Cheerilee asked.
“To make things right.”
“Let her go,” Applejack insisted. “This is between the two of them.”
“Bon Bon? Could I talk to him for a bit, alone?” Apple Bloom asked when she found them outside, locked in a warm embrace. “I promise I won’t hurt him.”
He nodded up to the mare.
“It’s okay, mom.”
Reluctantly, Bon Bon let go of the hug and walked back towards the hospital, where the other mares were waiting out of earshot.
“I’m sorry, Bastion. For everything. Including that nasty bump on your head.”
He shrugged.
“It’ll fade, and it doesn’t hurt that much. I’m sorry for cutting you. It’s just these things I’ve got.” He turned his forelegs to show the spurs that, despite his best efforts, looked rather sharp. “I’m so sorry, I just panicked. It was a reflex. I didn’t want to fight you, not for real. I didn’t lose it, I swear, I knew what I was doing. It was just an accident: the other times I did that move, it was with someone who had plates there. I would have hit you in the head, but then I noticed your bow and I didn’t want to cut it. And I really didn’t want to make you angry.”
“I know. You were tryin’ to cheer me up the whole time, weren’t you? You turned into me because you noticed ponies liked it when you changed shape.”
“Uh huh. I thought it might make you smile if I tried a shapeshifting trick, like it did for the rest of our class. I thought you wouldn’t hate me if I made you smile. And maybe if you knew my secret, we could be friends, because that’s what friends do. I should’ve known you’d get upset, but I didn’t know what else to do. It was the only thing I could think of that really came from me." He groaned, embarrassed. "I should have just given you a honey waffle.”
“You tried, and don’t worry: I mess up like that too. All the time, really. It’s my fault it all got out of control. I thought maybe you were just lying and manipulating ponies to like you, that you were faking the whole thing. Seein’ how they acted around you, just because of what happened to you, it made me angrier than I thought I could be. The way they talked about you, it just didn’t add up with how you really acted. Then when I saw what you were doing, I guess deep down I just wanted you to be bad, and the things I saw and heard just got warped. I don’t know if that makes any sense, but–”
“It does. It’s hard to accept that someone close to you can betray you like that. And it’s a lot easier to put the blame on someone you don’t know. It feels a lot better, pretending someone else is to blame. And it’s even better if you pretend so hard you forget why you’re angry.”
Apple Bloom winced.
“You too, huh?”
The changeling nodded solemnly.
“It took me a long time to accept that it wasn’t griffons who took my mom. But… deep down, I knew it wasn’t fair to griffons. I didn’t want my birth mom to be sad, or her other sons. It was just easier to pretend it was the griffons' fault and not the Queen’s. Chrysalis was supposed to watch out for me, for all the changelings of our hive, but she didn’t. Thinking she did and that it was griffons who hurt me just came natural. Made it hurt less. It just took time for me realise that, too.”
“That still doesn’t make what I did fair to you. I said so many nasty things about you, like it was okay.”
“Not to my face, you didn’t. Before today, I didn’t even know you had a real problem with me. I didn’t feel anything but friendship coming from you, even if you didn’t act like it. I understand. I’m sorry, I really am. This is all my fault.”
“No, it’s not. You didn’t know I was angry,” the filly protested.
“Yes, I did. I felt something when you saw me with my bees, something I hadn’t felt with any other pony in Ponyville yet. It felt like you thought I was one of you, like you were happy I was there. But then you never tried talking to me about it. You felt happy for just a moment, but you never acted happy after that. I didn’t know what to make of it, but I didn’t want you to think I was invading your privacy.”
“That still doesn’t make it your fault. There was nothing you could have done. I wouldn’t have listened.”
“I could have told your friends. You’d have listened to them. I could have asked a grownup to talk to you, I would have helped. I know how it feels to get angry like you did, I could have helped if I hadn’t been so scared of upsetting you. And they shouldn’t have scared you about upsetting me like they did. Sapphire said we changelings would deal with our problems like ponies do, and ponies solve this by talking, not by scaring each other. We could have worked this out sooner if I’d just talked with your friends about it.”
“Maybe. And…” she took a deep breath, “I want you to know that I don’t hate you, not now that I know. But at least a part of me was scared of what you might do.”
“So what? Lots of ponies can do scary things. If you’re scared of what I can do, you should be able to tell me. We can both cause some serious damage to each other, that doesn't mean we can't talk about that. I should have just said something about how ponies were acting. It didn’t feel normal, but I didn’t know what to do about it.”
Apple Bloom tilted her head at him. If she kept arguing over the blame like this, they’d be at it all night. Besides which, the boy would have one whopper of a headache at the end of it, if he didn't already. And right now, she had a more pressing question. One she assumed he would feel a lot better explaining.
“What exactly did you get from me, then? And when?”
“You didn’t think anything of me when I came to class first. You treated me like I was just another classmate, and you didn’t mean to hurt me then, I know that. You felt the same way your big sister felt about me at first, like a stranger. Then when you saw my bees, I don’t know. It was different from anything I’d gotten from any other pony, or anyone in my hive. I think I reminded you of something really old, or something. Like I was really an Earth pony, just like you. I wanted that to be real, to be how other ponies saw me, as well. Only… it didn’t work.”
“Why would you want to be an Earth pony? You can fly, and you’ve got magic,” Apple Bloom said.
“I don’t really need to fly anywhere. I’ve got nowhere to be in a hurry, I like going slow around here to see all the sights. And there’s nothing I use magic for that I can’t do without it, even working with my bees. But Earth ponies work the land, right?”
Apple Bloom nodded.
“Some of them do.”
“So that means they help get food for other ponies. That means other ponies don’t have to worry about getting food because of Earth ponies. If it wasn’t for ponies like you and your family, then your builders would have to be farmers, your artists would have to be farmers, even your soldiers would have to be farmers. If it wasn’t for ponies like you, towns like Ponyville would be just like my hive. You’re special because you let other ponies be special.”
The girl chuckled at him.
“You know, that might be the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”
Bastion blushed.
“I really wanted to be like you, that’s why I tried so hard to get that silly drink sold. I thought if I could make something that ponies liked to eat or drink, then I’d fit in. And keeping bees is something both changelings and ponies do, so I thought maybe I could use that to start my new life here. And I hoped if you’d like me, then that’d make it official. If you could get other ponies to treat me like I was just another Earth pony, then I’d really count as an Earth pony. That’s why I didn’t ask you for the assignment; I wanted to prove that I could do it on my own, and not just copy you. I was just hoping part of me would turn out to be close enough to an Earth pony, and if I could show you that, it’d be real and not just a fake.”
“You really like that little hive you’ve got, huh?”
The changeling nodded.
“It’s something I can take care of. I check the larvae every day to make sure they’re healthy, no mites feeding off them. I can show them where to find the tasty flowers to make the honey taste just the way it needs to, I don’t even need to use magic for it. It’s sort of like talking with your skin, little electric flashes. It’s fun, and it’s fair. I take care of them, I show them where to find food, they give me honey. Like Earth ponies take care of plants or chickens. It’s something I’m good at, and I like what I get out of it. And the bees help plants spread, so I’m even kind of helping the land.”
“Yup,” Apple Bloom agreed, “just like an Earth pony would, in your own way.”
“Thanks. I’ve never really had a choice, but being here in Ponyville made me realise that if I ever could be a pony, I’d want to be an Earth pony. But I’m not, and I can’t change that. And it was wrong to try and force it like that, I know that now. I should have stopped when I noticed my drink was upsetting you, but you never stopped liking me until today. I thought it was something else, that you’d feel better if I didn’t bother you for a few days and treat me like an Earth pony again.”
“That didn’t work out either.”
“No. I don’t think it would have ever helped. Even if you did treat me like an Earth pony, it wouldn’t really count. I really want this, but I know I can’t force it, it’s so frustrating. I just want it to feel real, and not pretend. Maybe if I just change shape once for keeps, drop my wings and horn, look like a real Earth pony?”
Apple Bloom’s ears perked at that.
“You shouldn’t talk like that. There’s nothing wrong with you, not really. You don’t need a magic fix if you’re not sick. Trust me, I’ve tried. Even if it worked, after a while you’d be unhappy. You wouldn’t have earned it.”
“I know how that feels. I started feeling so bad just for using the care package they sent me. Ramp wanted me to have something that reminded me of home, so he sent a couple of barrels of cherry juice and some other fruits, along with some honey. I had to do some of the work on my own, get the taste just right, but it still felt fake. I don’t want to just be here, I want to belong here. And I guess that means I have to earn it the hard way and not just try and get approval from you.” The boy sighed. “I really wish I’d figured that out sooner.”
Apple Bloom smiled warmly.
“It’s not as hard as you might think, and I think it’s mighty big of you to figure it out as quick as you did. It took me a while, too. But you have to understand that what you do and the way you were born aren’t the same thing for us. You don’t have to be an Earth pony to make food.”
“I know, my moms told me. There’s Pinkie Pie, who makes parties and cakes, Rarity, who makes dresses and can find gems… you’ve got so much choice here. Even a blank flank like you can do what she really feels like. You can go looking for what makes you happy. That is what a pony talent really is, right? What makes you happy?”
The filly nodded.
“Pretty much. When a pony finds it, things are supposed to just run smoothly, and they practise their talent to get better at it. But because they’re happy doing it, they already have a knack for it. Doesn’t stop them from doing anything else, though. Shouldn’t stop you.”
Bastion shook his head at the thought, no doubt seeing memories of single-purposed drones flash before his eyes.
“It doesn’t. I just want to try some simple stuff first. It’s my first time for everything, so I’d like to see what I’m good at and what I’m not. And I’m still getting used to keeping bees, actually, I really didn’t do that much of it back home. I just want to get this start right before I try something else. Something to fall back on if I fail, you know?”
Apple Bloom smiled at him.
“That’s a good attitude. But,” the filly started, “if you don’t mind my asking, what exactly were you before you came to Ponyville? You said you were a general? You’re not older than you look, are you?”
The changeling bit his lip.
“No. It’s a little more complicated than that.”
Bastion sighed as he went through the waxen corridors. Entering a great hall, he found his Queen wrapping up her instructions to what he assumed was a raiding party.
“Ah, just the boy I was looking for. Come here, Bastion,” Chrysalis commanded.
Slowly, he walked up to the imposing creature. As if her long legs weren’t bad enough, her gnarled horn made her tower over him even more. Still, he never showed any fear or awe. None of the other changelings ever did.
“Now, perhaps you can solve this conundrum for me. One of our foes has developed a new weapon: a shield that reflects our attacks and rejects our adhesives. They form tightly knit phalanxes that can even withstand a physical assault, and thermal attacks do not seem to cause them any damage. How would you propose we bypass this?”
Bastion thought it over for a moment.
“Well, what does my uncle say?”
“I’m not asking your uncle, Bastion, I am asking you.” Chrysalis glared at him.
“Oh. Indirect attack, then,” the boy offered quickly.
“Indirect attack? What do you mean? Speak plainly, boy, tell me exactly how you would approach this problem.”
“You said the shields reflect everything aimed directly at them, my Queen. That doesn’t mean they reflect anything at all. Throw an explosive ball of light above the phalanx, or two at the sides, have it make a lot of noise, and it’ll shake them up. Since the shields don’t block sound, you can deafen the enemy for a moment and create an opening like that. The mages can’t concentrate, the warriors try to block their ears and drop their guard. If the next wave tries to counter it with earplugs, you just change the attack formation. Their defence then can’t adapt, since the commander can’t issue orders to deaf troops,” Bastion explained matter-of-factly.
Chrysalis closed her eyes in contemplation before grinning to herself.
“Drones, you heard the boy. Good hunting.”
With that, the dozen or so raiders set off.
“Now then,” Chrysalis started, turning towards Bastion again, “I hadn’t sent for you yet, you’ve had your mites cleaned off already, so you must have a question. What is it?”
Looking right up at her, unabashed, Bastion shrugged.
“I’d like to know why my uncle is in prison.”
Chrysalis chuckled.
“Oh, that. It seems my dear War Engineer decided to free some rather valuable captives during our raid on Canterlot. And aside from that, he’s been questioning my rule.”
“So, the plans have changed then? Everything’s changed?”
Chrysalis sighed.
“Oh, Bastion, so much you need to learn. Nothing has changed. His position remains the same.”
“And the… you know…” he started, only now really becoming a little intimidated.
“No change in plans, my boy. Nothing to cause you concern. While we haven’t made it official yet, we are still betrothed. He is still the one I have chosen as my mate, and he is still the War Engineer to this hive. He just needs to learn his lesson first, that’s all. I trust Faux Pas and his judgement, and I’m sure he’ll see reason.”
“So why punish him like this?”
“Bastion, you understand that when your uncle and I are wed, that will make you a prince, yes?”
“Yes, I do.”
“And do you still know all the lessons changeling royalty must know? Do you know what they mean?”
“I think I do.”
“Alright, then, let’s test that. Of a thousand ponies, there are two hundred and fifty farmers, two hundred and fifty artists and two hundred and fifty builders. How many soldiers do they have, at the maximum?” Chrysalis asked, circling around him as she painted the mental picture.
“Two hundred and fifty, my Queen,” he replied without needing to think of it.
“Correct. And on a thousand changelings, how many soldiers?” Chrysalis asked with a grin. The look of mindless obedience in his eyes never ceased to give her a little sliver of pure joy.
“If the Queen makes it so, one thousand,” Bastion droned.
“How many farmers?”
“If the Queen makes it so, one thousand,” Bastion repeated in his monotone.
“How many builders?”
“If the Queen makes it so, one thousand,” the boy replied again, never once breaking posture or eye contact, or even changing the tone of his voice.
Chrysalis smiled, then waved a paw in front of his eyes. To her delight, he didn’t blink. He just smiled in return, glad for the approval.
“Exactly. That is our strength: that we can be whatever we need to be at any time. And who decides what we are?”
“You do, Queen Chrysalis.”
She flashed a toothy grin at the boy.
“And what if our hive needs something it does not possess? What do we do then?”
“We take it from a nation that does. We're not a civilisation, we are the thing that devours civilisation. We infest, we adapt, we take. We only put up a disguise, we never become the things we feed on. We're better than them, and we can take whatever we want."
“But suppose no nation has what we need? How many thinkers do we need for every problem?” The queen smirked as she gave the boy the same lesson she'd given him for the past few months. She never could stop herself from enjoying a changeling agreeing with everything she said without the need for rewriting their minds.
“Just one,” Bastion replied, “if they’re smart enough. And a spare if they’re important enough.”
Chrysalis circled around him, examining his posture. His breath was even, his back was straight, all good signs his conditioning hadn’t been tampered with.
“Precisely. Now, my little thinker, consider this: many soldiers would a thousand changelings make if I could not make them so?”
“None.”
“None indeed. If I cannot make my hivelings into what they need to be, then our proud race falls. And your uncle needs to see that for himself. That is why I chose to put him on trial: to let him make amends to me, and to show him that my strength is the strength of our hive. He needs to see all the changelings I command present, all my good little children staring down at him, to show him that my way is the right way for our kind. It’s just a reminder, nothing more.”
“So he’ll be okay?”
The queen of the changelings backed away and scowled.
“Compassion for your uncle. I suppose that can’t be weeded out without dulling your observation skills. Yes, he’ll be fine. I’m sure Faux Pas will see things my way, little Bastion. You won’t have to take his place for a long time. Unless, of course, you feel you are up to the task already.”
“With all due respect, I don’t think I’m as good as he is yet. I mean, he taught me nearly everything I know.” The little changeling fidgeted at the notion.
“Indeed. But he hasn’t taught you everything he knows yet, has he?” Chrysalis noted, turning away and starting to head off on some business or another.
“I wouldn’t know.”
Chrysalis chuckled, stopping for a moment.
“No, I suppose you wouldn’t. But I know Faux Pas, he doesn’t make mistakes. I trust he’s prepared you just fine for his position.”
Bastion fell silent. Apple Bloom found herself staring just a bit.
“It’s not as bad as it sounds, really.”
“But… you were supposed to take your uncle’s place? As a War Engineer? A-And you were going to be prince?” Apple Bloom asked in disbelief.
“Uhuh. It’s not that rare: changeling advisors are always close to their liege, and they’re the only ones who think for themselves, who can choose at all. It's not like drones, where you can make them do whatever you want. If a changeling king or queen doesn't want a mindless drone to wed, they have to take an advisor. So an advisor's family, if they aren’t drones, can become royal by marriage. That’s how it was going to be for me. My uncle, Faux Pas, was the War Engineer to our hive. He was her favourite, so she was going to marry him.”
He fell silent again for a moment and rubbed his head, possibly a pang of dizziness surfacing, or his conditioning.
“And you?”
Bastion shrugged and stared at the ground, ashamed.
"I’m his successor. That’s why they taught me the way they did. To changelings, it’s the thought that counts, and aside from some basic rites there’s no real marriage ceremony aside from the Queen making it official. So if the Queen says she’s marrying you, you’re kind of already married. And by our rules, that would make me a prince. So Chrysalis groomed me for that, too, a little,” Bastion explained.
“Wow. But I never heard anything about a War Engineer. What happened to him?”
Bastion sighed and gulped.
“Oh. I’m sorry,” she offered.
“It’s alright. I can talk about it now. I-it doesn’t hurt me anymore,” he replied with a meek smile.
Apple Bloom smiled back and slid a little closer for comfort..
Bastion walked into the dungeon with Sapphire Gaze by his side. Down in the lower levels of their hive -- Chrysalis hated the word ‘palace’ even though that’s what it’s was, really – the wax had been reinforced by magical means. Walking over to the only occupied cell, Bastion noticed the odd gleam to the bars. Crystalline protein embedded in a wax mesh reinforced with whispersilk, even his uncle would have a hard time getting past that.
Although there was that one incident with the zebras that no one had ever really figured out. Faux Pas had a knack for getting out of tight situations, and it was impossible to tell when he was faking capture and when he was genuinely in trouble. He certainly didn’t look it now.
“All hail the changeling prince,” Faux Pas greeted, “and the loyal Archmage. Come to pay a royal visit to the dungeons?”
Sapphire scowled.
“Stop fooling around, Faux, you’re not king yet. Guards, leave us.”
Wordlessly, the drones on guard moved out and flew out of earshot. They still obeyed the Archmage’s commands to the letter, at least.
“Easy, Sapphire. Can’t I have a little fun? I’ve been cooped up here for days now with nothing but drones to talk to. And I suspect Chrysalis made them all boring just to spite me,” the War Engineer joked.
Bastion stepped in front of the Archmage, cutting her off.
“Uncle Faux? Are you really going to be alright? I think Chrysalis might be angry at you.”
“Oh, nothing to worry about, Bastion,” he said, rubbing the little ‘ling’s mane through the bars. “Our queen is a little antsy, that’s all. She just wants to show her dominance by coming up with some silly excuse to throw me behind bars and put up a spectacle of a trial. It’s practically a changeling tradition: the same thing happened with her parents as well as her grandparents.”
“But why did you do it? Why did you free those prisoners?”
“Just as an observation. I wanted to see which way they’d run, I didn't think they were important. You know you should always observe your opponent carefully, no?”
“Yes,” Bastion conceded, his eyes going wide again. “Always watch your enemy. Watch what he appears to be doing, watch what he wants you to think he’s doing, and watch he really is doing.”
“Good boy. And what’s the most important lesson I taught you?” Faux Pas continued.
“Avoid conflict, always,” he droned. “Move to a position where the other side cannot interact with you.”
Faux Pas looked over the boy, noting his posture and his unnaturally steady breathing.
“No, not that. The other lesson.”
“Never underestimate the opposition, always double check and always have a backup plan,” the boy replied quickly.
“The other lesson, Bastion,” Faux insisted, grabbing his nephew in a hug, before stopping short of pressing him against the bars. “Don’t pretend you don’t know what I want to hear.”
Bastion blinked to snap out of his daze, and his breath returned to normal.
“We’re better than this."
“Exactly. No matter what Chrysalis says, we are more than what she says we are. We don’t have to keep stealing from others and pretending the rules don’t apply to us.”
Sapphire sighed, but didn’t speak up. Faux Pas slowly released his favourite nephew from his grasp, smiling proudly.
“But… what if Chrysalis is mad at you for saying that? Even if you are right?” Bastion remarked.
“Hey, this is me you’re talking about, remember? Chrysalis adores me, even now. And she’ll listen to reason, I’m sure. She’s putting up a little show for me, sure, but we’re still just going to talk things out, one rational being to another. She won’t harm me, I’m her favourite. Don’t worry: you’ll get to where you belong.”
“So she’s not mad at you?”
“No, don’t be silly. After all the things I’ve done for our hive? After all the battles I got us through, all the new weapons and spells I supplied her? She’d never lay a finger on me. She’d certainly not grow one to lay it on me. She might be a little cross with Sapphire here, though: she’s been giving me the eyes.”
Sapphire Gaze grumbled.
“Oh, don’t flatter yourself. You’re at least ten years my senior.”
“Love is blind, as they say. Good thing, too; makes it easier to catch and eat,” Faux Pas replied with a grin.
Sapphire groaned.
“Ugh. Bastion, do you have anything else to say to your uncle?”
“No, Sapphire. I just wanted to be sure he’s alright.”
“Then I think it’s best for you to leave now. I get the impression your uncle’s about to say some things not fit for children’s ears.”
“See you after the trial, uncle Faux,” Bastion started.
Faux Pas smiled at his nephew, and for the briefest moment his face betrayed a hint of regret. The boy didn't notice.
“Goodbye, Bastion.”
“I don’t understand. Chrysalis was gonna marry your uncle, but she put him on trial?”
“She didn’t love him, not really. We can tell, remember? I doubt she even cared about it during the trial. But I wouldn’t know, I wasn’t there. I just went up for fresh air to steady my nerves before the trial started, none of the other advisors were allowed to be there. Sapphire came up after me, and I guess she knocked me out with a spell. I don’t really remember it that much, she’s good at that sort of thing. When I woke up, we were on the border of our territory, and my uncle wasn’t with us.”
Bastion caught his breath a little, and closed his eyes as the memories played back in his head.
“We, uh, we had this beetle with us, that my uncle made. It was a part of him, something Sapphire could use to communicate. We teleported to the desert, gave him the signal we were safe, and then the beetle went ‘poof’. And that was it. We knew he was dead then. I never even realised what was going to happen. I never said my farewells. But Sapphire said she was going to take care of me. My uncle had made her promise.”
“So why aren’t you with her, then? If she promised to take care of you, she must care about you.”
“She does. But succession triggers on death for us, that’s the rule. So when my uncle died, technically I took his title. And I took it before they signed the contract. So I count as one of Chrysalis’ advisors now.”
“So what? No one knows about that, you never did anything. Why should you have to throw a good life away over something as silly as that? You could have ended up a lot worse,” Apple Bloom protested.
“Because ponies aren’t the only ones we’ve attacked. There are others, countries that don’t see things the way you do, and the only thing stopping them from… they can’t hurt us because they have to follow rules. But that only goes if we follow the rules, too. According to international law, our rules are as valid as anyone else’s, so they count. Even if I didn’t do anything, the law says I count as an advisor, and every other nation in the world will accept that as true, that’s how it is."
Apple Bloom suddenly realised something.
“Wait a second. If you count as an advisor, doesn’t that mean you had to sign the contract for the rest of them, too? You had to sign away the chance to live with her?”
Bastion nodded.
“I know it might not matter, but it’s not worth the risk. I know there are nations that hate us, and I think you know that, too.”
Reluctantly, Apple Bloom nodded.
“I suppose there would be.”
“If they find any excuse, anything at all, then they can say we still broke the rules. And-“ He clenched his teeth and shivered, going into a panic response, almost. “I’ve only heard stories. I don’t wanna find out if they’re true or not. I just follow the rules and do things fairly, so the rules keep me and everyone else safe.”
“So that’s how you ended up here. Your uncle thought you deserved better,” Apple Bloom patted his back to calm him down.
Bastion shuffled a little closer.
“What about you? Your parents, I mean.”
“They’re not around. And… that’s all there is to it. I made my peace with it a long time ago. The family I’ve got now is what matters, and I know my parents would want what’s best for me. Same way your uncle wanted what was best for you.”
“I guess you’re right. My uncle rather died than to be a king for a race of parasites. And I think like being a beekeeper with ponies better than being a changeling prince. The food’s tastier, and the company’s better.”
Apple Bloom smiled at that.
“You could do that, you know. Being a beekeeper, I mean. Handling bees is a fine pony talent, and we make plenty of food with honey.”
“I know: honey waffles, honey mustard, honey mead –“
Apple Bloom chuckled.
“What?” he asked.
“You sound just like my sister when she’s talking about apples.”
“Is that a good thing?”
“Very good. Trust me, when you come around by the farm sometime, Granny Smith will want to have some words with you. She’ll like you a lot, I’m sure. You’re a lot like my great-grandfather, now that I think about it. Maybe that was what you picked up on: you reminding me of the stories she told about him. He was a pilgrim who settled here, and he had to find out what stuff he could use from his old life, just like you. He’d learned to find, collect and grow the right seeds before he settled here, like you learned to handle bees in your old life. He also had to learn how to settle down and make a home while stayin’ his old self, just like you. And he wound up being the start of Ponyville.”
Bastion nodded at her.
“I think that is what I picked up on. It’s nice to know I’ve got something in common with a pony like that.”
“You do, and you don’t have to worry about having to leave your past behind you. It made you what you are, including what you’re good at now. You can have a bit of the old to help with the new. And the bad things in your old life, well, I haven’t seen them drag you down yet. If you hadn’t told me, I wouldn’t have known anything was off about you. You look happy to me, even with everything that’s happened.”
He shrugged.
“It doesn’t matter anymore, even if it does hurt a little. I’ve got two new moms. I’m happy with them, they’re happy with me. What I left behind is, well, behind me. Ponyville’s going to be my home now. I just need to try and fit in like a pony. Which is a lot harder than you make it look.”
“I wouldn’t mind helping you with that, you know. There’s one thing that’d be sure to help you belong.”
Bastion looked at her intently.
“We have this tradition in Ponyville. My granny started it, actually. Our orchard’s got these trees with fruit called zap apples, and they bloom once a year. They’re magical, so we have to do all these weird things to process them, and when we’re done we make a jam out of it. Granny Smith showed me how to do it last year, and this year she’s going to let me make a batch all on my own.”
“I don’t get it.”
“Zap apple jam is made with honey, and you’re the only beekeeper I really know personally. I know it’s just a hobby for now, but… if you really want to make food, you’re already pretty good with your bees. Like I said, my granny knows some of it, too. I think you might be as good as her, and she took a long time to get that good. If you really like doing it that much–“
“I do. A lot.”
“Then you should keep at it, and there’s no reason for me not to want to use your honey for zap apple jammin’, this year or any other year. But I should warn you: zap apple jam is only made with extra sweet honey. You need to be really nice to the bees that make it. But if you can do that, you’d be helping with a tradition that’s as old as Ponyville. It was the first food that was made here, part of the reason the town exists in the first place. You know stuff about making honey because of where you come from, and like I said, just because you live here now doesn’t mean you have to throw everything from your old life away. You can hold on to a part of your past and just mix it up with our past.”
“You’d do that? You’d let me do that? E-every year? But you can use any honey you want, it’s my bees who make it, not me,” Bastion argued.
“Doesn’t make a difference to me. It’s something you put effort into, just like picking apples or tending to trees. And I want you to feel like it’s worth something, because it is. Making zap apple jam is a Ponyville tradition. I’m part of that tradition because of how I was born. You weren’t born into it, but you could be a part of that tradition, too, if you wanna be. And if you think you’re up to it.”
“I’m not sure. But I’d really like to try,” he decided, rubbing away the last of his tears, one the filly assumed was one of joy. “Thanks.”
“I look forward to tastin’ some of your honey, then. Friends?"
“Friends.”
She hugged him close, and carefully put his forelegs around her so the spurs didn’t bite into her fur.
For the briefest moment, a sob escaped her lips and she clenched him tight.
"And if things ever do catch up to you and you need to talk to someone who understands, you just have to ask."
She couldn't see it, but she felt Bastion's head bobbing up and down in agreement.
"Thank you. I'll help you explain what happened, too."
"Thanks. I think I've got my work cut out for that."
Slowly, they broke the hug and smiled at each other. Silence fell between them.
“So what happens now?” he asked.
“I can think of a little something we could do.”
Celestia sighed as she finished the progress report on Alveola.
“What is wrong, sister?” princess Luna asked.
“Things aren’t going as well for the changelings as I’d hoped. They are growing their crops and tending to their orchards, as we expected. It’s taking time, though, I’m beginning to worry if they can stand on their own four feet in time.”
“They are a resourceful breed, you know that,” Luna remarked.
“Indeed.”
A little bout of green flame erupted in front of the Princess of the Sun, coalescing into a scroll.
“Word from Ponyville?” Luna asked.
Celestia chuckled as she read the letter.
Dear princess Celestia,
This is Apple Bloom, Applejack’s sister. I’m writing to you about some things that happened the past few days.
I learned that sometimes things make you angry, and it’s hard to see why. Things can get under your skin so badly you don’t even realise they’re there. All you can do is lash out. And when you lash out at your friends, it’s hard for them to help you.
I hurt Bastion Pristin the past few days, I lashed out. But it wasn’t because he was a changeling. It wasn’t because he did anything. It was just a lot of anger bottled up and mixed with misunderstandings. It wasn’t because of him, it was because of ponies of around him, and neither of us realised what was going on until it was too late. We both ended up in the hospital because of that. (I only have a paper cut, he’s got a concussion, so I won.)
“Oh dear,” Celestia started.
As sorry as I am for what happened, there’s a bright side to it. I learned a very important lesson today. I learned that it’s not always easy to make new friends, especially when they remind you of something painful. If you happen to meet a new friend in a hard time, that alone can make you enemies. And when other ponies make you feel bad about being friends, even if they don’t mean to, it just makes things hard. But when you both want to be friends, things will work out in the end. All it takes is a little kindness and understanding.
It’s important to share what you’re feeling so others can help, and to keep going to get to the bottom of the real issue. Sometimes you don’t even know what the problem is until you talk about it to someone who understands you. And when you do have a problem with someone, it’s between you and them. Even if they’re trying to help, getting others involved in it doesn’t always work out.
I made friends with a changeling today, and while we both got off to a very rocky start, we’re both happy to be friends. We worked it out, on our own. And we know how to avoid misunderstandings like the ones we had in the future.
In short: I learned that it’s not always easy to make new friends, but it is worth it to try. A true friendship can form even out of shaky starts.
Your faithful Student,
Apple Bloom
Celestia smiled at the letter.
“Another friendship report for the archives, sister?” Luna inquired.
“Yes, I think we will hold on to this one. It’s Apple Bloom, Applejack’s little sister. It seems she’s learned the meaning of understanding and made friends with little Bastion. After quite a tumultuous start, I gather.”
Another flame appeared between the princesses, another scroll delivered. Celestia took it in her magical grasp and immediately read it.
“Ah, and this one is from Bastion.”
Dear princess Celestia,
This is Bastion Pristin, writing to you from Ponyville, my new home. Apple Bloom said her sister was meant to write letters to you about any important lessons she learned. She said I should write about what I learned, that you’d be pleased to hear of my progress.
The princess chuckled at the boy’s sentiment.
Well, today I learned a very important lesson.
“I wonder what he’s learned. Something equally important, I should hope,” Luna started.
Celestia’s expression turned grave at the next line.
Never get close to an angry Earth pony, they can kick your head in very hard. Even if it’s a girl.
Especially if it’s a girl.
Your faithful Student,
Bastion Pristin
Celestia looked up from the letter and shrugged at her sister.
“Well… close enough.”
The End.
2636146
Considering this isn't the first time she's slipped someone drugs or did some potion abuse, I'd think the understanding route is more helpful. And as AJ points out, this isn't like her. Apple Bloom is very clearly upset about something, and while she should be punished for bad behaviour, she's not going to stop until this issue is resolved.
Applejack doesn't spank her because she knows better. And as she rightly points out: "She's had enough yelling for one day." Apple Bloom isn't normally this malicious, and keep in mind this response didn't work out too well when Twilight turned malicious on fake Cadence . Everyone abandoned her then, instead of stopping to ask what was really bothering her. Of all the Mane Six, Applejack is the sort most likely to keep this in mind for the future.
But yeah, if you wanna spank a kid who's already crying and has been abandoned by everyone who normally cares about her -- regardless of whether she deserves it, that hurts -- that's your call. I don't hate you for it.
2634072
You keep assuming that things stated from a character's perspective are objective truths. They're not: every character can right or wrong in their assessment of the situation, and the narrative perspective shifts, so the narration doesn't give objective truths all the time either. You don't know why Bastion can't be alone, you know what others think is the reason he can't be alone. You keep following the thoughts of whichever character you agree with and assume it's totally accurate, without giving some critical thought where it might prove useful.
Ah Cracker, reading your stories are like bringing a camera into focus, you start out being able to see a blurry image, a few details come into focus as you adjust and then suddenly everything becomes clear. Well done it's been a fun ride.
2636755
Glad you enjoyed the ride, sir. A lot of thought and effort went into this.
Here's hoping Chrysalis doesn't come back to ruin everything, huh ?
After the beginning, I had to force myself to read the rest of the chapter. It only got worse.
-Apple Bloom's explanation for her anger makes absolutely no sense. She wanted to be friends with Bastion but all of sudden she doesn't want to be friends with him since everyone is telling her to be friends with him?... Wha-...? No. No. No. That doesn't work. Not even when Changelings get involved! This is just-. I don't even know where to begin with actually explaining why this is wrong because it requires a method of thinking only Discord would be capable of!
-The explanation of the transformation and "general" stuff is more of the same. If Apple Bloom would have been impressed with Bastion's shape changing power, she would have been impressed with it the first time! Your description of her first encounter with his shape changing is a vague "restraining herself from saying something", but Sweetie Belle's reaction should be enough to say Apple Bloom didn't think much of this power. On the second point... oi... Why would Bastion say he commands Chrysalis's army when he has no intention of returning to her?!!!!! Instead of transforming into Apple Bloom, why not answer her questions or, better yet, clarify what he meant as he does here?!!! As a being with supposed emotion-sensing abilities, he should have felt her fear spike upon telling the truth, and even if this isn't true (because you don't really go into the limits of Changeling emotion-sensing, I'm still pretty sure it would be true), would any Changeling really think that transforming into a pony that is afraid of/hateful towards you would calm their nerves?!!! No. It bares repeating: No.
-The whole point of the adviser successorship and contract is ridiculous. So he might have inherited the title just before the contract was made... so what? He never served as an adviser, but even then, surely his leaving the hive would null that tradition! Right?! It doesn't make sense to pass on the role of War Engineer to someone who has left the hive, presumably permanently because he is now making contracts of peace with your sworn enemy! I'm sure Chrysalis has long by now appointed a new Archmage and everything else, even though the "current" Archmage is still alive. In addition, a Changeling of Bastion's age is really expected to be able to command armies, even if he was being trained (and likely still in training)?! I say again (even though I was wrong about why last time, but no more twists now), I'm surprised Changelings aren't extinct from their stupidity. This makes the plot of the entire story completely contrived. Fair?! Yeah, right. It's "fair" that he was treated like the other advisers because of who his father was and that he died before the contract could be signed? I don't think so. It's heavily implied all non-drone Changelings are still conditioned; there's no need to treat Bastion different.
2636743
-Okay, I get the whole seeing everything from various points of view now, and my assumptions, but it was not "following [only] the thoughts of whichever character [I(text to prevent italics)] agree with", nor thinking of them as objective truths. I was taking things--all things--as they come and applying it. Besides, with a story written in such a way, what else can I do? I suppose I could try striking down certain combinations of characters' thoughts as untrue, but how could I possibly know which ones to exclude, especially since many, if not all, combination of truths-untruths could lead to a reasonable progression of the story? You give no hints as to which perspectives should be discarded. If you expect the readers to do this, then you need to provide such, otherwise it's like a crossword where you not only have to find the right words, but also have to "discover" the word boundaries! (-somehow...)
Finally, overall this is just an unsatisfying ending. You write the story up into a crescendo, then throw us off a cliff into Lake Conflictless... or, well, at least thrown into the resolution of a conflict completely unrelated to the cliffhanger, which is instead brushed aside almost like an afterthought ("Oh yeah! The last chapter ended with Bastion admitting to being Chrysalis's general! I'll just slip in a few paragraphs of dialogue explaining that..."). I enjoyed everything up to this point, but this is one of the biggest no-nos (or one of the cousins of the biggest no-nos, whichever) in the art of storytelling, and by itself warrants a downvote. I really did love everything before this chapter, and I want to do otherwise, but this...! I'm sorry. I know you can write a good story, but this one is a dud (which kind'a only makes it worse that it's your most popular. Sorry again if that sounds horrible.).
(A final tiny bit of advice: If you make a comment reply on a chapter different from the original comment you're replying to, it doesn't send a reply message to whomever you are making the reply to--your reply has to be on the same chapter for the alert to go through. Odd, and almost surely a bug, I know, but that's how it's worked for as long as I remember...)
2636930
Hoo boy, it's exactly for this sort of response that I wrote the blog. Let's just address the major points here:
-Apple Bloom didn't want to be friends with a perfect stranger at first just because ponies told her to. She would have made friends if things had been left alone and if she'd gotten to know him. What she resented at first was the notion that she had to make friends with someone she didn't know. In other words: ponies were telling her how to feel before she even met him. When she says she didn't want to be nice because of who he was, she is stating a general outlook on things: it's wrong to treat someone special just because of how they were born. Sound familiar? Add to that the fact that she has a past with similar experiences and they don't treat her that way, either.
-Bastion tells her he's the general because she asked, and he thinks explaining himself is a friendly thing to say. When he transforms, it's because this is the only thing he's seen that cheers up other ponies. Apple Bloom wasn't impressed by it at first, she was annoyed ponies were making him do tricks like a circus freak. But Bastion thought "Oh, this makes them smile, might come in handy sometime." Plus, he was confused and he didn't know what else to do. He wanted to make friends with her, on his own, and that includes trying to patch up things even if he has no experience dealing with ponies. She jumped him before he could explain properly. When Bastion talks of 'impressing' her, he's referring to the drink he was selling, which he thought was backfiring because it competed with hers.
-Bastion does not sense emotion, it's even spelled out as such. He feeds on love and liking aimed at him. When Apple Bloom does finally genuinely hates him, he doesn't get any spikes of fear or anything coming off her, because he never had this ability. He knew she was angry for a while because of how she acted, not because he was 'sensing' anger. If she'd really hated him from the start, he'd have known because he wouldn't have felt stronger around her.
-Bastion counts as a War Engineer because he was designated by his uncle as such and because the changeling rules say the successor can immediately take command if the previous one dies. The reason this matters isn't because Bastion served as anything, but because the rules say he is. In the prologue, it's made clear that there are other nations besides Equestria that need to be taken into account. When Apple Bloom rationalises Bastion's presence in Ponyville, she rightly points out Celestia can't deviate from international rules by even a letter. It doesn't matter if Celestia, Chrysalis or even Bastion himself considered him a War Engineer, other nations can consider him as one and cause trouble. Also, it's stated that every changeling that can think for themselves left. Chrysalis doesn't have any potential advisors left.
-As for the cliffhanger, if the 'general' thing is the only question that matters, rather than "Is this ever going to be alright between them?" then yeah, I guess it is unrelated. If you don't care about the repeated mentions from Bastion that he wants Apple Bloom to be nice to him, and even the notion that he might have a crush on her, then yes: this cliffhanger has nothing to do with the actual conflict.
Bastions letter... Oh my god that is priceless!
2637347
Yeah, he's fitting in nicely, but err... he doesn't quite grasp the basic concept just yet.
2637352 i see
It's over D:
2637499
Yup. Next story in the series (if any) will focus on how Sapphire and the rest are building their new town. Also a pony named John is involved. Trust me, it makes sense in context.
Wonderful chapter, and a fantastic ending, but man... Being honest here?
That chapter title was looming over me the whole time, and throughout the read I was paranoid somepony was in a changeling cocoon the whole time :/
... Oh well, probably just me :x
It's over. I loved this story. very well written. and it all worked out in the end I hope we meet Bastion again!
15/10 moustaches
2637578
Oh, right. Sorry for that, that wasn't intentional. On one hand, I wanted a chapter title that didn't spoil the ending, so this kind of left it open. It's supposed to represent the treatment both protagonists have been getting: locked in their proverbial coccoon, and only now emerging as better individuals. But yeah, did not mean to imply that.
Huh, on another note, it seems the disappointed ones are in the minority, or less vocal. I was expecting a worse reception, to be honest.
2637592
In all fairness, though I love the content and emotions put in, I *do* feel as though the ending was a little bit anticlimatic, not because of itself, but because of chapter 7; you never really gave us a solid climax.
To elaborate, neither AB or Bastion really knew what was going on last chapter, and by extension, neither did we. You painted a huge picture of a fight in the dark, but we never really had any solid sense of what the stakes were, we were still caught up in questions. Why is he doing that? Is he evil? Is Applebloom paranoid? Are they all cocooned ()?
We never got to feel that sense of accomplishment that most (story!) climaxes give, because the plot seemed to collapse mostly-way through the rising tension - it goes from two friendlies fighting each other, no solid goals being achieved through action, a break of time, then a rough (in a very, very good way, I must say) happy ending with the accomplished goals all being thrown in a more-or-less wall of text.
Do take the above with a grain of salt, I'm not a professional in any regard except in having a childhood of reading fiction (:x), and I'm sure there are equally valid arguments saying the opposite. I'm not sure what exactly could've happened differently to put more of a definite climax in, but hey, you built an entire world around these guys and gave them an awesome story; I most definetly can't complain
EDIT: Also, WOAH, I thought you were referencing another guy's work when you brought up Faux Pas, but it's actually your other story! I must look deeper into your stuff O_o
Never get close to an angry Earth pony, they can kick your head in very hard. Even if it’s a girl.
Especially if it’s a girl.
ok ill say this i think it ended to soon, like what happened after they got out of the hospital? what about the class? ect.
BUT i still loved it!
great story i really REALLY hope the adventures of Bastion and Applebloom continue! X3
maybe Bastion and the CMC! :D
eather way i am sad its done now but i still loved it and will got back sometime to read it again! X3
and talk about a twist when Bastion talked about his uncle! O_O
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So what manner of climax should have been added, then? This is pretty much the same kind of resolution I used for my Flight Camp fic. The only difference is that on that one, the story didn't peak right before the long conversation. It was more of a slow process, with the main character coming to terms with a condition no one knew or even understood.
The stakes were simple: is everything ever going to okay between these two, who really should be friens, considering how much they have in common? Apple Bloom's insistence that she does like him and Bastion's supposed crush are what's at stake at this point. If I added something more concrete, then the message of understanding -- and the empathy with the characters' confusion -- would have been diluted. As for concrete goals, there were never any in the story. The only thing that comes to mind is the assignment, and there's already some text-based resolution in the form of a letter.
You're right, I could probably have added something more concrete in between the fight and the waking up. But then it would have been a different story entirely. The whole point of the fight is to show the final escalation of their conflict and create tension over what happens and why. If the reader doesn't sympathise with one of them, the suggestion of grievous injury helps mend that.
Thing is, throughout the story there's been moments where they could have talked it out if they'd just had some time alone and some patience, and this is (supposed to be) evident from the ending. The fight, like a lot of things on the show, isn't supposed to serve as a climax to the story but as something that -- while painful -- makes sense in hindsight and is the logical conclusion to what's been happening.
See, here's the main thing: some people will take that as an anticlimax. Other people will see it as a tribute to peaceful conflict resolution. While it is a sudden drop in the levels of tension, it's supposed to be. It's supposed to show a situation where anger and misunderstanding brings things to a boiling point, but the final solution is simple talk and finding some common ground. If you want the closest comparison from the show, try "Over a Barrel". Two sides try to work out a conflict, they can't sit down together without others meddling in, there's this big action scene that really doesn't accomplish anything, and the solution is pitifully simple.
So, sure, it comes off as an anticlimax, that's a tradeoff I made. But you have to admit it still made you feel good. That's what I was aiming for.
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I may write an epilogue detailing what he says to his class, but I hadn't planned on it originally. I've had the idea of showing his first birthday in Ponyville and his birth mom showing up, but... my exams start Thursday, and I'm already really behind on my studies.
Glad you both liked it, at least.
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like it thats an undertatement, if im willing to go back and read it agein im putting it on my tablet to read! so yeah its a great story and that sounds like a really feels filled idea and id love to see it! i just hope this is not the last we see of Bastion ^_^
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-Of course she wasn't going to be friends just because she was told to, but after she started to get to know him and want to be friends on her own accord, everything else shouldn't matter. Yes, she may have had a similar experience, but that would have been a long time ago; ponies eventually would have stopped treating Bastion so nicely just because he's an orphan as things "settle". It's not about how he was born (don't know where you got that from), but what had happened to him. It's normal to be extra nice to someone who, key word, recently experienced a tragedy--this applies to Bastion, but not Apple Bloom, thus (to me) it's "fair", whatever that's supposed to mean in this context...
-Even if that was Bastion's thought process, he's been constantly reminded to not change shape and that he shouldn't have to for anypony. If he thinks the drink wouldn't have worked in beginning to repain relations with her, why not give her some honey instead or, if he doesn't have any, promise some with his next harvest? I'm sure there are other things he could have done that I'm not thinking of that would have been better than doing something he's been forbidden from doing.
-Okay... I was pretty sure about the emotion-sensing, but... okay. Too many Changeling headcanons to keep straight all the time! I still stand by the idea that no Changeling would think that transforming into a pony who is angry would calm their nerves, no matter what they're angry toward. In addition, if Bastion does have a crush on AB, then he should have noticed how she didn't seem all that excited or even happy with his shape changing display, even if he can't sense emotions; it was obvious enough to SB.
-If Celestia herself didn't know about that the title of War Engineers (per the ending of "Faux Pas") existed, how would any other nation know about how adviser titles are passed along among Changelings? In fact, I'd say it doesn't even matter if the contract hadn't been signed by the time of the old general's death; Bastion had still already by all accounts left Chrysalis's hive, thus unbinding him from any traditions that hive might have held him to.
-the commander of armies issue is only the crisis: the highest point on the story arc (the arc being the rising conflict between Bastion and AB)--it needs a proper resolution, but instead all you give is a couple lines of dialogue, which is more of a cliff rather than the proper slope of falling action.
2637592
Just wanted to add this: Thank you for calling me "disappointed", rather than something like "a hater".
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-The main reason she wasn't making friends with him when she should have is because the way ponies treated him made him look like a manipulator in her eyes. The supposed tragedy obviously doesn't affect him anymore, it's the fact that he gets treated like he's sad or should be that fuels her paranoia. And a lot of other things just conspired to make it worse: she was acting out on anger and Bastion just wound up getting the brunt of it. She wouldn't have grumbled if he'd actually looked as sad as ponies made him out to be, and she'd have just asked about the drink if ponies hadn't filled her head with the notion that the slightest thing would be hurtful. And all the while, no one seemed to care about how Bastion was actually feeling.
-Bastion's been constantly reminded not to change shape because ponies feel it's beneath him: he doesn't need to remove his spurs or change his apearance to look less threatening, because that'd make him think that ponies are really expecting him to change what he is. That message is just related to "be yourself". Him changing into Apple Bloom is something else entirely: it's the only thing he thinks would cheer her up and is something he can do on his own. The reason he doesn't give her any honey is mentioned earlier in the story: he doesn't feel it's something he made, but his bees did. That's another issue he's trying to work out: what counts as something he accomplished and what doesn't. Also... he openly says he messed up and made a mistake by turning into her. He was confused, what he did made sense to him at the time.
-Celestia does know about the title of War Engineers, it's explained in the prequel. And changelings have attacked other nations, who are -- presumably -- a lot more knowledgeable on their customs (mild spoiler: one nation even has its own changeling agents in a planned sequel). What she wasn't aware of was the fact that succession passes on with death, and that there was a successor to Faux Pas to begin with. None of the other advisors had one, and they were so used to Faux being their military leader it never occurred to them. Besides that, the full function of a War Engineer isn't so much to be a military leader in the heat of combat (which is a tactician, not a strategist) but to be able to come up with new strategies, counters and fighting techniques, something one could deduce from what he says to Cheerilee. Bastion was only trained in the technical side of things, they never got around to his strength or anything else. He had the bare minimum of skills, and was appointed. This also means any changeling drones that show up might still be conditioned to listen to him as a leader figure.
Also, the subject of fairness and rules is one of the main themes for both this and the Faux Pas thing. The reason Chrysalis acts the way she does is because she feels that being parasites to civilisations is better than to be one of their own. She feels the rules that nations abide by shouldn't apply to her, and are more of a bother than anything useful. The prologue has the changelings openly admit that they'd rather settle things by pony rules than to rely on deception. There's this overarching theme that rules are sacred to the 'lings now, because Chrysalis rejects the notion and ponies have lived by them for centuries. This is repeated on a small scale with Bastion's attitude: regardless of whether or not it is fair, he's too scared to deviate from these rules for even a little bit, because he feels that doing so endangers both him and those around him.
-As for the commander of the armies issue, I might just rewrite that bit into a flashback instead of dialogue. Didn't think I'd need to break the flow of the emotional conversation and big reveals (and the people I let preread didn't mind, either), but hey, live and learn. Might add an epilogue for the class talk as well, but exams first. I honestly don't know when I'll get back to this story. I'm getting a little tired of it at this point. Quorum Sensing sequel next, then I'll see.
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It is. It's based loosely on Dominant Species, but with a few elements thrown in. I refer to a similar game in one of my other fics.
i dont normally go for OC pairings but i really like bastion and applebloom. sequel?
extra suffix
Anyway, I can't get over how evolved these kids are. They screw up, but then they talk it out like the most rational of people.
I still need to process what I've been reading.
Also, I saw author note about how you changed the story for the readers, against the point you were trying to convey.
Write for you, not us. Sometimes we will not always agree with the message, but I'd still rather read an author who's true to themselves on where they stand, and what they want to say.
It's like Bastion in the story, he should say what he wants to say, not what everyone else wants to hear.
I don't see what all the hate for Applebloom is for.
I think for all of the information she got, she was being honest and logical in her assumptions.
Huh, well that explained everything. Thanks for giving Apple Bloom a reason to be upset all story long that was understandable and not actually caused by her just simply hating changelings.
I'm mildly curious what the several different endings were, but given how behind the times I am on this story I suspect that's it's a long dead issue.
An author should write for himself. Readers are just a lucky side-effect.
Regarding that end note, assuming that next chapter or whatever is the new ending: having read through this all the way in one binge, I can see why readers would like to see Apple Bloom get more of a comeuppance. There's a divide between what an author thinks of his characters, OC or canon, and what the readers do - the author does all the plotting and the writing, while the readers plow through the chapters between 200-600 words a minute. More importantly, a reader only sees what the author put in the story, not what the author didn't put in, whether it's something you thought about writing but didn't, or thought of as background information that never even came close to getting in.
Speaking from the viewpoint of a reader, Apple Bloom definitely didn't come off very well for the most part, and this chapter suffers a whiplash from the reader perspective, going a bit too close to an 'all is forgiven' without consequences ending.
My two bits.