A few hours of maneuvering this behemoth into the forest for cover against the Delta Team was useless. In only a few minutes after parking, an ominous sound echoed above me. I quickly evacuate the vehicle, but something gets into my vision.
Mr. Bubblepants was right behind the seat, along with some other things, so I snatch a few things, put them into my vest and a bag I got, and ran into the forest.
...
"Come out with your hooves up!" echoed across the forest, seeming to come from my left. I ran right.
I ran right into a tree. My already weakened body begins to feel faint, so I look into the bag of things I took. Moving Mr. Bubblepants from the top of the bag, I saw a few food-items that pleased me. I took a bar with a smeared label that read 'Energe', so it should be an energy source. Perfect.
I tear off the wrapper, slowly walking right, and take a bite...
My head fills with immense pain, as I writhe on the floor for a moment, but my head quickly clears. It REALLY clears.
"Get over here!" yells a pony to my left... And I see him. Well, not him, really, but a vauge outline of him and the surroundings.
I was seeing the area around me so clearly that I observed the pony, most likely a guard and male in the outfit, look feebish and scared from his movements. I smiled when I saw that nopony was right by him, so I looked around me.
They had split up. The fools. I feel excited as I ran towards the guard-pony at a speed I never knew I could even go and saw his shocked face.
He couldn't even speak a word before I smashed his face into the ground. He was alive and breathing, but probably was now concussed with brain damage. He, too, had a silver rectangle on his side, but that wasn't what I was interested in.
I removed his guard clothing and put it on. I casually ran through the forest, going straight south (according to the sun) and smiled.
I looked around me once more and saw a large group of ponies back North, most likely finding their comrade, for they made a lot of noise. Running much faster, I finally see the edge of the forest. but I do not leave the forest.
I see many vehicles outside the edge of the forest. I wait, and listen...
An hour passes, and I see something funny. I saw through the ground with my sound-sight thing, and saw an outline of a sewer of sorts. I follow the pipe deeper into the forest and find a broken lid. I remove the lid and go into the sewer, the guard's armor e not feel disgusting... or it could be the fact that the pipe was empty.
I slowly moved through the pipe for even more hours and finally emerge on the surface from a lidless opening.
I was blinded, for I have been in the sewers for so long, but saw no evidence of ponies around me.
I rub my eyes, blinking, and the fuzzy lights dissipate. I was on top of a cliff, looking down onto a city.
An empty, destroyed city.
This story moves ridiculously fast and is very hard to keep up with.
3209790 Yeah, that is what happens when you are hyper-active like me, I'm sorry if it ruined your experience.
[Drama]I AM SO SORRY[/Drama]
3209938 This story started out good and had lots of potential but it kinda went a bit down hill when he met the first ape by the river bank.
3209965 Well, if you do not like all of this randomness, try a different kind of random. Less apes, I assure you.
Alright I'm just going to give you my feedback on the story, first thing I'm not going to needlessly hate it's your story you can do what you want, I liked the beginning and thought it had potential but It kind of lost my attention as it got to the point where his parents were killed off and then sour lemon was taken in by apes, I just find that at this point it just seems to go by really fast and gets really hard to follow, I also find it jarring how he seems sane and then his sanity just seems to take a drop all of a sudden, I read a few more chapters but I don't think this story is for me, it just moves too fast and all over the place, Anyway that's my 2 cents on the story.