• Published 24th Nov 2012
  • 1,778 Views, 73 Comments

Could this be paradise? - Timemaster

I stand before a fire, chilling my bones, but a light suddenly gives me a choice...

  • ...

I do not know.

The sound was odd, for unlike the coconut siren in my old village, this one seemed to be much livelier, emanating panic throughout the land.

Walking, on my hind legs, up the stairs, I see a small window. A window embezzled with gold and other fancy materials, shining from the direct light.

'What time is it?' I think, moving upwards towards the window, wanting to see many things, but I mainly wanted to check the time.

Straining my legs to move up my entire body, I start to see a glimpse out the window from a few steps below it. The time was, indeed, night, but something was off about it. The moon, unlike normal days, seemed a little sad for some reason. The reason was probably the fact that a hero had to KILL a criminal, but all evil must be stopped!

Continuing to walk, a small pain in my flank, I begin to look at the walls of this stairway, seeing paintings of the bandits.

Some were painted in a battlefield against the griffens, for what reason is unknown, while another depicts the bandits... earning a medal?


This makes no sense, for why would bandits get medals? Were they hired mercenaries in some war or something? If not, then something is very amiss.

I grunt, looking downwards at the amount of stairs I have climbed.Counting each of them with my mind, the answer baffled me. Fifty. I have only climbed fifty stairs in a few hours, meaning I am very poor at walking on my hind legs.

"Dang." I say with an odder voice than ever before,"What the-!?" I exclaim, wanting to know why my voice sounded like some gorilla-book villain. I cannot remember the name, but it was somewhere along the lines of Night-man.

But, I did not care much, for I had some bigger problems coming from upstairs.

"Hey!" A loud, booming, male voice says, hoofsteps with increasing intensity coming nearer,"What are you doing he-" he stops, looking at me.

"Oh, a newbie, eh?" I nod without thinking, "Well, it seems you have a good sense of your surroundings, for you are already in melee battle stance!" He says, a small grin on his face.

Observing him, he seems to have a damaged eye, for one had a scar through it, and he was entirely white, ESPECIALLY his mane.

I really dislike his mane.

I look at him, trying my best not to quiver in fear,"W-where do I go, sir?" to which, he replies with a thinking pose.

Unlike the other bandit, he wore no armor, so he may be important.

"Well, the armory is downstairs, but you don't need that yet, the kitchen is upstairs, and the royal guard center is upstairs..." he continued to ramble, but I paid no heed, for something just exploded my mind.

"Royal... guard?" I mutter under my breath, looking at the... royal guard standing in front of me.

"...My chambers is right by the pub, so tell all of your fillyfriends..." he still ranted, seeming to ignore me.

Using this to myself, I let my mind wander down to the depressing thoughts.

'The one thing I did not want to do, cause harm, is what I did and more. I am now in someone else's hooves AFTER killing them, taking their place and life... I feel dirty.'

"Are you listening?" the stallion barked.

"Yes, sir!" I said, trying not to blow my cover with the tears I am about to shed,"But I have somewhere I remembered to go, so excuse me ,Sir!" He nods.

I run on my hindhooves all the way down the stairs, my muscles burning with pain that chilled me all the way, and escape out the main door.

'What have I done!' My mind blares, destroying any other thought I had.

'I did not just kill an innocent, I killed a protector, a pony who made their life for good...' I tilt my head to the left slightly,'But...'

I sit on my flank near the main door,'It felt odd.'

I memorize the intense emotions of killing that stallion and how GOOD they were, I mean, they felt as if I was being pulled inside some deep, dark, yet happy, goo. I was being covered in emotion, but I barely recognized it...

'What sort of monster kills for FUN?!' I yell into my mind, my face cringing.

I sit there, thinking...

'The guard did try to take some bits from me

I stand up on my hind hooves, feeling wetness on my face. I had been crying.

... it's all justified...

I wipe that cringe off my face, beginning to smirk at my reasoning.

nothing is wrong...'

I clean off my tears, taking off the armor and tag, and placed them in front of me.

'I just have to get rid of the evidence.'

I concentrate my magic, performing a spell I used to help build huts around our city. The pressure in my horn, while painless, made me feel like I was being crushed. The pressure kept on building up, crushing my thoughts and dimming my perception of my surroundings. The area around me, including the door, began to distort, mainly due to the hallucinations this spell creates for me to keep me focused.

I grunt, my throat feeling sore and inoperable, feeling the pressure release from my horn, heating up the area in front of me. The pain of the release was minimum, but the pleasure was absolute, filling my entire being with the joy of a spell gone right.

The outcome of this spell was 50/50 for me: The metal of the armor and tag were melted to an indistinguishable,molten pool, but my mind began to play tricks on me.

General Guerrilla Gorilla always tole me about hallucinations, for he always has them of the days of war between tribes, but they soon made peace afterwards. He always said,'Hallucinations are things you must ignore, for if you accept them, you will go mad!', or at least I think he said that, for most Generals of the Gorilla army can speak Equestrian, but not like me.

So, in regards to General Guerrilla, I just ignored all of the hallucinations, especially the speaking ones. I waited, for about a minute or two, for the hallucinations to dissipate from my sight.

Blinking, I go from the insane hallucination world to the normal one, my eyes feeling bloodshot.

'I should go to the immigration office, for Lion Gorilla told me I would be an immigrant to my own kind a loong time ago.'

I make sure my vest has everything first, hugging Mr.Bubblepants before I finished, and began to walk, on my hind legs, to the center of the city/town/capital.


I have barely walked 10 feet, slowly as to not cause suspicion, and I already see how populated this city is.

There are many ponies, dressed in shiny attire in this heat, and they all have their heads pointed up... with their eyes closed.

Looking more closely, I see some thu- I mean guards- hidden among the citizens, but their pure gold armor makes them noticeable to the most blind of ponies.

Amused and baffled at how the dressed up ponies can see where they are going, I chuckle a little, earning some attention to a guard next to me.

"Somepony died today, but you are laughing," he said sadly,"Why?"

I look towards the sad pony and see everything he was wearing.

He has the normal attire of the guards, but he also had all these medals streamed across his neck and torso.

I smile, turning to the guard,"I will giv you an answer, but you must know it will be long." I said, wanting to speak with somepony... even if I only talk.

He nods.

"I smile not because I am happy, but because, out of all odds, I am alive. I, a pony with no parents, have lived with only gorillas as parents, but yet I live. I have gone through many raids, deaths, and tragedies inside my clan, but I still remain." I grin,"If happiness cannot win, all is lost, but as of right now, happiness is here. If I die, it would continue on, crushing time and space itself, so," I heightened my voice,"happiness will continue on after all is gone, but sadness shall always be there too. We must never allow sadness to win, but we must embrace it at times... but now is not the time." Iclose my eyes, taking a pose,"It is time to repent for all our evils, find joy in sorrow, and bring happiness to the dead."

I silently pose there, waiting for a reply, but I got something else instead.


I open my eyes, seeing not just that one guard beside me, but also seeing a large group of ponies with tears in their eyes and smiles on their faces.

I look to the guard, seeing him smile, but still crying a it,"Son,"he started off,"Who are you?"

I grin, always wanting to say this,"I am Sour Lemon, raised by gorillas, and I wish to be a citizen of this fine country!"

I hear more applause, but I hear quiet hoofsteps approaching me.

Turning to the sound, I see a pure white pony with no mane, smiling at me.

"I am Emma Great, the immigrant office executive, and I would like you to come to my office for your test." she said, smiling.

I smile back, knowing I have just taken the first step of my journey.

Applejack and Braeburn are in a small shop in Canterlot, taking a small break from the Lemon family search, when they hear something odd.

"I am Sour Lemon, raised by gorillas, and I wish to be a citizen of this fine country!"

Applejack spits out the small cracker she had been eating, hitting Braeburn in the process.

Braeburn, while disgusted, doesn't care as he rising from the table quicker than Applejack.

Applejack rises, slowly because she just ate and look out the window.

Sure enough, there was a crowd, but there was nopony in the center of the crowd, baffling Braeburn and Applejack.

"What in tarnation happened?" Applejack said, exiting the shop.

An energetic blue pony, tears in her eyes, but smiling, says,"A pony named Sour Lemon just made an amazing speech about happiness!" she said, tears of joy(?) waterfalling off her face, hitting the ground in front of Applejack.

"Where did he go?" Applejack and Braeburn said in unison.

The energetic pony pointed to the gates,"I thi-" Applejack and Braeburn did not listen, running out the city in a flash, causing the pony to slam her flank on the ground,"nk he went to the immigration office, but let me go grab my stuff at the gate....." she said, rambling on.


Applejack and Braeburn run for miles, searching every stone for Sour Lemon, but came up with nothing.

"Gosh darn it!" Applejack yells into the sky, angry about the missed chance.

Braeburn looks towards Applejack with the same agitated face she had,"I am going to stay in Canterlot to make sure he isn't there, you go search the roads!"

Applejack nods, determined to find Sour Lemon.

They both ran, examining their surroundings to make sure Sour wasn't there.

I sit in a plain white office, reeking of limes for some reason, as a mare walks in, handing me a document.

"Are you ready for your test?" she said, happy.

I gulp, thinking of all the fighting tests the General Gorillas put me through, but sighed of relief once the document hit my hooves.

"Yes, ma'am." I said, confidently,"but... I cannot write without some help." I confess.

The mare smiles and takes the document from me,"Alright, lets do the oral test."

I nod, knowing its meaning from Madam Le Gorilla, my teacher.

"Who is the leader of Equestria?"

"Princess Celestia is the main ruler of Equestria." I say. She nods.

"What is the name of Celestia's sister?"

"Luna." She nods.

... it went on like this for an hour, but the questions got slightly harder.

"What is the square root of pi?"

"1.77245385091" I say, grinning. She nods.

"Well then! You got 100/125 questions right!" She gets up from her desk and reaches out her hoof,"Welcome to Equestria Sour Lemon."

'On my first day here, I killed somepony. This is such an odd welcoming... Welcome to me indeed.'

"Mrs. Emma, thank you for your time." I say, like a gentlecolt (it was a question I got wrong) should. I shake her hoof.

"Oh, I am not married, so call me Emma." she said, blushing a bit after I grasped her hoof.

After a good shake, I let go of her hoof and begin to walk towards the door.

"Um.." Emma said, causing me to stop for a moment,"Would you like to get some coffee sometime? For a celebration that is!" she said, covering herself.

"Sure!" I say.

Exiting the room, I hoof-pump with sheer joy and glory.

'Finally! A friend!'