Cloud 9

by Lion Heart

Demolished

Cloud 9

"Equestria is not the only continent in this world" - Pvt. Lemon

As I am walking with barely any supplies left I decided to leave my wing the way it was, and fix my paw to save the other med-kit. Ill need it for later. As i am walking through the forest i realized something.
"DEAR GOD WHAT IS THAT SMELL?" I screamed at myself. the floor was sticky and uncomfortable. I felt sick to my stomach I felt like vomiting. Not because of the smell,
but because of the pure concentrated fear i feel inside of me. Beacuse there where eggs filled with those things. Where they dead? I just dont know. I was getting more cold by the second for some reason. There was a path with hoof prints, that's probably where they
went. I decided to keep my balls and just go in the cold, dark, horrific path. "Dammit its pitch black i cant even see the way i started" I felt life an idiot. I had a flare
all along. I only had one though, but i used it anyway. Then i see light on the way forward. It was a flashlight. I heard some moaning. "HELLO" I cried helpless. And in need for support.
"IS ANYONE THERE" I yelled again. Then I heard a respond. "LIONHEART IS THAT YOU" said the unknown teammate. I ran towards the stallion. It was Pvt. Lemon.
"HOLY MOTHER OF GOD HIMSELF, IT IS YOU." Lemon said. "I asked "What happening to the rest of our team" "something took them some thing inhumane" He said.

I said "I'm gonna patch you up, you aint look so hot" "Dont fell hot either" Lemon said. We chuckled. as I patched the wounded soldier, We heard some creature howling.
Something... inhumane. "We better hurry, I'm starting to feel insane right now" Said Lemon. I responded "Same." so we decided to postpone the healing for now
until we go into the sunlight. We were quiet for a long time. Thank goodness he has a good amount of supplies. When we heard rustling everywhere, he handed me a
knife and said "I'm trusting you, Dont get to much blood on sahsa." I couldn't kill it. I Dont even know what it is. but if i Dont, it will kill us instead. So i must hunt
or be hunted. Right as it pounced out of the bushes, I yelled with rage and stabbed it in the chest. "Blood isn't red" Lemon said. I started to shake uncontrollably
while feeling pain in my arm. "I feel like something impaled me in my back" I said in a gargling voice. "I know that feel bro" He said in a upset voice. "Why are you so sad for some reason" I said. Pvt. Lemon had no expression in his face. just like i did
"We better set up camp here before we freeze to death" I said. "Good idea" Just as everything is going great, we hear scary noises. "Oh god why" I said "Shut up and go to sleep, we will need it" said Lemon

END OF PART 2

Comments

[Ahuitzotl]

Sounds cool Lion Heart.

[Lion Heart]

1597335 ok thank you i am editing it now

[Marozia]

Try not to take this personally, but your story would benefit greatly from an editor or two, as I have noticed several major flaws in your writing. One, your spelling, grammar, and punctuation are all rather atrocious (again, don't take it personally) and you switched between present and past tenses on multiple occasions.

In addition, the story itself is very confusing, and combined with the aforementioned flaws, it makes your writing almost incomprehensible. Forgive me if I have offended you in any way, but if you want to become a better writer, I would suggest finding an editor to lend assistance.