Ok.
What. Just. Happened.
I stood there, right past the closed door of the bathroom, feeling like I could simultaneously have an anxiety attack and pass out from overexertion at the same time.
“How… how did I let myself get so vulnerable?! Why did I let that happen? I. Only. Just. Met her!!” I could still feel my heart racing from the pure awkwardness of that interaction.
I loudly groaned as I sat down and placed my head in my— hooves. “And when will this stop being weird…”
It was still surreal, looking down at my body and not seeing the same build I was used to seeing for my entire life. “I guess it makes sense though… I’ve only been a horse… pony… for what, like 7-ish waking hours? And for most of it I was so dead set on getting out of that forest that I only really acknowledged my body a handful of times.”
Still, it was weird. Maybe eventually I’d get used to it, but for now the only thing I felt towards my body was confusion.
I inspected the fur on my foreleg, brushing against it with a hoof. It was soft, surprisingly so, and almost seemed to spring back to a brushed state without much effort. Throughout my interaction with Redheart, I hadn’t even acknowledged the fact that neither of us were wearing any clothes (besides her hat, which didn’t really count), but what I strangely realized is that I didn’t feel naked. Whether that was because of the fur that now blanketed my body or something about my physiology changing, I really had no idea.
I shook my head clear, realizing I got distracted. “Right, I was… freaking out about that awkward as hell conversation. At least that tangent calmed me down a bit…”
I took a deep breath to calm down my still somewhat racing heart and refocused my attention on my surroundings. Looking around, I saw what I expected to see from a hospital bathroom, with a small sink, a toilet, a wide shower, and a number of handrails— hoofrails?— along most of the walls. The toilet seemed sized for someone twice my height, but at least there was a small stool in front of the sink that I could stand on to reach it. I sighed, once again being reminded of my currently short stature.
“How’d I even end up as a kid anyways?” I mentally pouted. “Not that I can really ask about it, though.”
I still knew that revealing how I actually ended up here would be a terrible idea— right now, at least. I’d just have to deal with my current situation as it is, until… when? A part of me assumed forever. “Now hold on, I’ll be able to trust someone at some point, right? I’ll just wait to tell whoever they happen to be, and then they can convince everyone else for me.”
That part of me still wasn’t convinced. I ignored it.
There was another aspect of being stuck as a kid that I started to think about, but I pushed it aside in exchange for actually doing what I was in here to do.
I tested putting weight on my injured foreleg and winced at the searing pain. It seemed like I still needed some time before I’d be able to walk on it properly. “I’m probably stuck here for at least a couple more days. Ugh…” So far, being quadrupedal was quite a downgrade.
Hobbling over to the sink, I sized up the stool sitting in front of it. It was only about half my height, but I still didn’t want to end up knocking it over in my attempt to climb on top of it. I took slow steps up onto the stool, being careful not to put too much weight on my injury, before looking up and seeing—
Oh.
Wow.
My brain stopped working again. All I could do was stare at myself in the mirror with a shocked expression on my face.
It took a moment before coherent thoughts could begin to form.
My initial reaction was: “Wh-wha— is that… what I look like?” Which was probably the dumbest question I could come up with, considering this was, in fact, a mirror, and I wasn’t actively going insane. Hopefully.
I looked away for a moment, took a deep breath, then looked back at the mirror. The same face I saw before awaited me when I did.
My reflection looked…
“...Do I really need to acknowledge it?”
…
“Ugh, fine.”
“…I look cute.”
Indeed I did. And like, really cute too. Like “could make a really great plushie” levels of cute.
I… did not know how to feel about this. It was a level of shock I was unable to process.
It took another few moments before I could acknowledge any details about my reflection. Before me stared a pony with wide, bright blue eyes, a small, rounded snout, and large, pointed ears. It had a mess of sky blue hair with a stripe of green running front to back, along with a small, dull horn peeking out through the front of it. Sand colored fur covered the pony’s face.
And that pony… was me.
“Is this… really how I look like now? Wow…”
I experimented with expressions for a moment, twisting my face every which way. I watched as my reflection matched every goofy expression I could come up with perfectly. It was almost surreal seeing such human levels of emotion on a face that was quite far from being human.
A face which, to my surprise, looked strikingly feminine.
At that realization, all I could do was stare.
…
That was until I heard a knock at the door. The sudden sound pulled me out of my trance in a bolt of surprised motion that almost sent me sprawling on the floor.
“Terra, dear,” I heard Redheart’s muffled voice call through the door. “Are you almost finished up in there?”
“Fuck, right, the nurse. I was supposed to be washing my hands in here. Er… hooves.”
“Um, almost, just a second!” I shouted back.
I quickly leaned forward and braced my forelegs on the edge of the sink, before turning on the water (oh, right, I can still grip things) and clumsily scrubbing my hooves with the provided soap. “Hold on, what’s even the point of this? I’m just gonna put 'em back down on the floor, anyway.” Maybe this is magic soap, and it keeps my hooves clean even when I walk around on them.
I chuckled a bit at my own silly idea. “Hah, magic…”
I finished up at the sink, dried my hooves, then scampered back to the door. Upon opening it, I saw Nurse Redheart standing right outside, unsurprisingly.
I looked back at the bed, before I suddenly found myself airborne once again as Redheart picked me up and placed me down on the plush sheets. It was less shocking than the first time, but still quite humiliating.
Redheart began speaking, “Alright, I wasn’t sure what you wanted to eat, but I hope this is to your liking.” She then pulled a tray from her back that I didn’t notice there before, containing a small salad, an apple, and another glass of water.
“Now,” she began sternly, “I don’t want you breaking another glass, so be careful with this one, okay?” At my short nod, she continued, “Are you having any trouble with your hoof grip?”
“Hoof grip?” I mentally questioned. “Oh, yeah, holding things. Still have no idea how that works.”
I shook my head, and Redheart smiled. “Good, we wouldn’t want your magic to be damaged.”
…
My brain froze again.
“Wh— magic??? Like, actual, real magic? That I have? I… really was joking before.”
I really needed to stop being hit with information bombshells every five minutes. I wasn’t sure how much more of this I could take.
I glanced up at the horn atop my head, suddenly remembering its existence. “Maybe this thing is more than just for show…” The idea that I might actually be able to use real magic, like a… wizard, or something, was astronomically cool yet equally terrifying.
I looked over at Redheart again and finally took notice of the fact that she did not have a horn herself. “I guess there’s different pony variants? Why did I get a horn, then?”
Upon remembering I was still actively in a conversation with someone, I commanded myself to stop freaking out and get on with it. “Not in front of someone else! Just… forget about it for now.”
“Uhh… yeah,” I mumbled, as Redheart placed the tray she was holding down onto the bed in front of me.
Now, I wasn’t the biggest fan of salads. I’d only ever eat them if there were literally no other options available, and even then I’d rarely add anything to them, since I didn’t like most of the foods that went into a typical salad. They were never really worth the effort to make, and I certainly didn’t wanna waste money on premade ones when there were usually other, much better options available.
Even still, seeing the salad in front of me, my stomach growled again in acknowledgement of my gnawing hunger. I hadn’t eaten in a while, and I didn’t want to ask for something else when Redheart was nice enough to get this for me. So, despite my reluctance, and due to the lack of silverware, I bent down and took a bite of the salad.
…
Wow. This salad was good.
I didn’t know if food just tasted different here, if my taste buds changed, or if I was just glad to be eating something, but in that moment, I didn’t care. This was genuinely the best salad I had ever eaten. The lettuce was crisp and fresh, the cucumber crunchy and juicy, the tomatoes ripe and flavorful. My singular goal became finishing the thing as fast as possible.
“Slow down!” Redheart cautioned with amusement in her tone. I ignored her.
A short while later, I was eating up the last few leaves of lettuce after luckily managing to not choke on my food. Redheart looked on, seemingly quite entertained, although I might’ve caught a hint of concern in her expression.
Upon realizing what I had just done, my face went red. “Um… I uh… I was hungry…”
Redheart snickered a little bit. “I could tell,” she said with a mirthful expression. “Now, once you’re finished with your meal, I have some more questions for you if you don’t mind.”
I suddenly felt nervous. “Oh god, she’s gonna ask about where I came from. What should I even say? I can’t say what really happened, I already decided on that. But what do I say instead? It’s not like I can just say nothing!”
…
“I could just say nothing.”
As awkward as it might be to remain completely silent when facing questions I didn’t want to answer, lying could get me into an even bigger mess and the truth could lead to… I didn’t even want to guess.
Anxiously, I picked up the apple and began eating it. It was wonderfully crisp, and rivaled some of the best apples I had eaten back home, which helped to calm down my thoughts. “Ok, so the plan is, if I’m asked about where I came from or how I got to the forest, I’ll just stay silent. Or… maybe I could just be really vague?”
As I thought, I finished up the apple with sips of water to wash it down. It seems I had already gotten a pretty good grasp at holding things with hooves. The thought process to hold and manipulate objects was surprisingly similar to doing the same with hands, and took almost no additional mental effort. It was still rather strange though, having a flat surface with no dexterity at the end of my limbs.
I looked down at a hoof. “So… this works through magic, huh?” I carefully watched the end of my hoof as I… activated my grip?... and noticed a very faint shimmer of something right on the surface of it. “Wow, if ponies use magic this casually, it's no wonder they’re the dominant species here. Makes me a little worried about what else is out there, though…”
My thoughts were interrupted. “Alright, are you all done now?” Redheart said in a gentle tone.
I nodded, and she continued, “Good! Now, I have a few questions for you if you don’t mind.” My anxiety grew, before she followed up with, “Feel free not to answer if you’re anxious, but I’d be really happy if you do answer.”
It felt demeaning to be talked to like a child, but I suppose it was still a nice sentiment.
I gave a brief ‘ok’ before Redheart asked, “Ok, how old are you?”
Oh.
I… hadn’t even considered that.
I really had no way of knowing how old I actually was here. With how I felt in the body I was in, I’d say I was somewhere in the 8-12 years old range, but even then it’d just be a guess.
This question had me trapped. With how obvious it should’ve been, not answering would be incredibly strange. I ultimately decided to just follow up the question with another one.
“Um… h-how old do I look to you?” I asked nervously.
Redheart seemed confused and I immediately felt bad. There was nothing I could do to help it, though.
“Well… hm…” Redheart pondered for a moment. “I’d say somewhere around your early twenties.”
…
What.
It… seemed like ponies just age slower and I was making a big deal out of this for no reason. Cool. I mentally chastised myself for not even considering the possibility.
“Oh, well, um… I’m 22.”
“Ugh, this is so weird. Does that mean I won’t be considered an adult until my late thirties or something? Blegh…”
Redheart smiled, and said in a warm tone, “Alright, thank you for answering. Now, if you don’t mind telling me, do you have any place you call home at the moment?”
A wave of emotion threatened to overwhelm me again. I forced it back down and simply shook my head.
Redheart’s expression softened with sympathy. “Oh, you poor dear…”
She then reached down and gave me a gentle hug, stroking my back with a hoof like she did before. I was a bit startled at the sudden physical contact but it was still strangely soothing.
“Don’t you worry one bit, we’re going to find a home for you,” Redheart assured, continuing to embrace me.
I was… oddly ok with this?
I hesitated. “Hold on, what am I doing!?”
I took a moment to self reflect. Since getting here I’d been doing nothing but making a complete fool of myself and being completely helpless. And now I was accepting help even when I was perfectly capable of handling my emotions on my own. “Cmon, I gotta assert myself more! Just because I look like a kid doesn’t mean I have to act like it. I’m an adult for christ sake!”
I gently pulled away from Redheart, but said nothing. I knew that on some level I’d still have to blend into the role of a child, but that didn’t mean I’d have to accept everything about my situation.
Redheart smiled sadly at me. “Alright, I have just one more question. Would you mind if Applejack came to visit? She’s the pony that saved you.”
I was a bit wary at the idea of having visitors. If I could help it, I’d want to keep the number of ponies that see me stuck here, helpless, to a bare minimum.
Still though, I wanted to thank her for getting me out of that situation. And regardless, Applejack must’ve already seen the worst of it when I collapsed in her campsite. I didn’t even wanna think about where I could’ve ended up had she not helped me when she did, as uncomfortable as I was with having screwed up so badly that I had to be saved.
Having decided, I simply said, “No, I don’t mind. I’d like to thank her at the very least.”
Redheart’s smile took on a happy tone as she said, “Great! I’ll send out a letter to Applejack letting her know. I’ll get you some more water too, you go ahead and get some rest.”
Redheart then picked up the tray and set it on her back, then began walking back to the door. At that moment, I realized something.
“Oh! Um, if you don’t mind, I have a quick question too…”
Redheart stopped in her tracks and looked back at me, before saying in that same serene tone, “Of course, anything.”
“Well, uh… for my stay here… um… do I owe anything? I wouldn’t be able to pay for it if I do…”
This was a genuine concern of mine. Considering my past experiences with hospitals, I always came to expect the astronomical bill for even the most basic of things. Insurance helped with that, but it’s not like I had that here. I didn’t know this world’s policy for lost children, but for all I knew they could really expect me to be able to pay for this stay.
“Oh no, don’t worry about that at all,” Redheart replied earnestly. “A filly your age shouldn’t have to worry about the bits you owe to anypony.”
Uh.
‘Filly’? ‘Bits’? ‘Anypony’??
“Ugh, pony words. I’ll just assume that the filly is me, whatever that means, bits are money, and anypony is… just silly.” We didn’t say ‘anyhuman’ back home, so what’s the point of that? “Whatever, maybe I should just assume that everything is weird here and get on with it.”
Despite the weirdness, her response did help to assuage my fears. I gave a brief thanks as Redheart resumed her journey out of the room. Soon I was left alone, letting my mind swirl with thoughts of my past, present, and future.
Nurse Redheart slumped to her desk with a weary expression. Terra’s situation kept being revealed to be even more dire than she thought. Redheart hoped Terra was lying, but didn’t really think she was.
A lost foal was one thing, an orphaned foal was even rarer, but one without a home? It was almost unprecedented. The Ministry of Foal Welfare was a well oiled machine, efficient at dealing with missing and displaced foals. Terra’s parents' passing should have been properly acknowledged, and Terra should have been relocated to a new family. The implications of the contrary happening were concerning at the very least.
Terra’s mannerisms added to that concern. Her overbearing shyness, the speed at which she ate her food, her anxiety at the idea of having to answer questions, her shying away from physical contact, and her apparent financial concerns worried Redheart further. Some of these could just be explained by the situation at hand, but some hinted at something far worse.
What could have really happened? Emotional abuse? Foalnapping? Redheart’s head swirled with the possibilities, but as much as it worried her, she knew that asking Terra for what happened directly wouldn’t have been a good idea. She simply needed more time to recover.
Redheart pulled out a blank piece of paper and began writing a letter to Applejack, informing her that Terra had awoken and she would be allowed to visit. Redheart chose not to share her concerns with Applejack though. That would be something to bring to the attention of the Ministry while sorting out finding Terra a new home.
She then took a moment to do just that, finishing up the letter to Applejack and composing a new one to the Ministry, being sure to include every detail and concern that she had about Terra. She then took both letters and dropped them off in the hospital mailbox, before returning to her duties, her mind still on the mysterious unicorn filly.
And thus the assumptions begin. Wonder what the odds are that someone is going to incorrectly assume sexual abuse.
Her body betrays the wanderer's real age. Advanced knowledge and wisdom lie behind those eyes. Don't be fooled by this one's looks. She has already seen a lifetime.
(I just came from playing Darkest Dungeon 1 I wonder if you can tell)
Loving this one
11870765
thank u! :3
11870763
I woke up half an hour ago and upon seeing Darkest Dungeon, immediately said Drunkest Dungeon out loud.
11870777
Well there was that one NPC that'd throw a chalice of tainted booze on ya, I think. That could lead to such an experience.
I have to wonder if it'll be a similar situation to another story I read for what little the MC does say about their past, the universe does it's best to make a liar of them.
"My parents are gone" and there's actually a distressed couple looking for their foal.
On that note, 22 being little filly age seems so strange to me. I guess growth is very slow, though it makes 1000 years seem like not a long time in comparison. I would think with the longevity, forgetting things like Nightmare Moon would be a lot harder.
Still, I won't let it bother me. Honestly I'd love to be a small pony foal for an extended period, really just enjoy the experience, not having to grow up quickly and just BE a child. Something I didn't really get to do growing up.
11870836
You don't happen to have a link to that story, do you?
11870856
I can't remember the name, tho the story was unfinished last time I read it.
Might have been a Boopy Doopy story tho? They do a lot of sad ones.
YES new chapter.
Terra is ridiculously cute! I'm loving your depiction of equestria so far as well, It feels very warm and fresh.
I am so used to reading old stories, it felt weird seeing the image actually working for once.
11870886
thank u very much!!
11870889
lmao felt that
11870836
The age thing is something I've seen other human to pony fics do before, and it's not entirely unfounded- Granny Smith predates the founding of ponyville, and apparently still has quite a few years left in her.
That said, it's also a narrative construct and I wouldn't think too hard about it. FiM has always had soft, story-driven worldbuilding, rather than hard-and-fast facts and rules, and this lines up with that just fine.
And yeah. It would definitely be nice to have more time to enjoy growing up :) I think humans are a little too quick about it. I certainly wish I'd had a few more years with it.
EDIT:
I'm imagining the scale is somewhere around 3:1, which places the healthy pony lifespan around 250, and terra at just over 7 in human years.
11870896
this exactly! couldn't have said it better myself :3
also lol i gotta note down somewhere what the age ratio should be, thanks for the reminder heheh
What if Redheart was testing her with this? Like, there’s no way a foal would be in their twenties but suggests it anyway to see how Terra would respond.
Redheart didn’t seem too worried about a filly concerned with financial debts. This would raise another red flag to me as it would indicate a history of some sort of servitude.
11870970
hehe who said ages work the same way as on earth? :3
Oops pretend i remembered to include that one
The founder's cutie mark was the 'surprised Pikachu face' on a non-descript pony's face. No, it doesn't make any sense. No, I don't know where it came from.
My face when mfw
Ooo, the age thing was one of my favourite parts of Trust Once Lost! It's cool to see you took inspiration from that aspect of the worldbuilding.
awesome story so far
11871183
lol dw too much about errors in my author notes, they're meant to be casual
11871263
thank u!
Great chapter!
Oh, does their calendar work differently? Or is it 1:1 earth years? Maybe day and night count as two units, idk
Thanks for the chapter!
I don't want to tell you how your story goes, please don't take it as such
Ihope this has redheart through most if not all of the way through i love the character
Neat, poor little lady keeps making her situation worst.
On, dear, it's one of those universes. Ugh, I'm already getting flashbacks to that fic about fanatically religious human-turned-filly and how the writer insisted on portraying ponies as absolute and utter idiots.
11873601
You mean Beyond Me? dw lol, I don't plan on going the same route they did in terms of plot. The age thing will have prevalence later, once I get further into Terra's character arc.
11873633
Yes. Like... goodness. Oh how I despised that whiny, holier-than-thou, my-way-or-highway filly. And good lord, the portrayal and implications that ponies are idiots. And sure, let's throw a fill who knows nothing about The Great Game into the political circuis against ponies who have centuries of experience. What can possibly go wrong?
And it also felt like the writer had a personal grudge against Celestia.
I still have a bit of a problem with the ages of ponies artificially enlarged, I admit. After, it's just a detail, but it's still a point that tickles my suspension of disbelief. Of course, I respect the author's choice, even if I don't agree with it at all, and it won't stop me from continuing to read the story, which, apart from this point, I like on the whole.
But I'm sorry, without wishing to be unkind, but this thing about ages is just fantasy of fans with a bad sense of observation. There's nothing in the series to indicate that ponies live longer than humans. There really isn't.
The fact that Grany Smith knows Filthy Rich's great-grandfather? What about that? On average, a human generation is considered to last between 22 and 32 years, i.e. between 3 and 4 generations per century. Ponies being the equivalent of humans on Equus (because otherwise, they wouldn't live long if they had the same lifespan as real ones). Which just means that Grany Smith is between 80 and 120 years old, and Ponyville a little less.
The same goes for the age of the princesses! Far-fetched figures of 3, 4 or 10,000 years... The series has given several keys to guess the age. And Celestia's age would be between 1120 and 1140 years, which is already a good age, indicating that she and Luna only reigned together for a century.
Because if not, 250-year-old ponies (an age that comes out of a magic hat), that's far too few generations of ponies for Luna to be forgotten (or else, ponies have a memory like goldfish!), it just doesn't make sense!
For Celestia, season 8 gives the number of sunrise years she's make (1111 years), and season 7 indicates that her mentor, Starswirl, disappeared when she and her sister were teenagers. Just make the correlation.
And Ponyville? It's only about a century old! That's more than enough time! On Earth, there are what are known as mushroom towns, which in just one or two generations will grow from a few thousand or tens of thousands of inhabitants to over a million, or even more! Just look at China!
So, I'm sorry to come and play the big bad pragmatic guy, but I wanted to bring another point of view to the subject.
As far as the story is concerned, I'm very interested in the psychological point of view of the protagonist and his (her?) entourage, and the futur evolution of all this.
PS: The drawing is very cute.
11873825
To be fair Luna wasn't forgotten, she became Nightmare Moon and the thing about memories is they can get foggy with time I'm only 24 and I have problems remembering things that happened 5 years ago I can't imagine what 120+ years of memories would be like. We also don't get to spend a lot of time with the older residents of Equestria so it's a real possibility that the very oldest ponies DO remember Princess Luna. So I don't personally dislike or think the slow aging is to crazy.
11873825
Heh tbh the age thing is mostly cause I just needed Terra to be young to be able to tell the story I wanted to tell. While looking into it I found that the age of ponies was ultimately too vague to have any basis to go off of, so I took the liberty to make something up. Notice the AU tag, btw. I'll mostly be sticking to established canon for the sake of cohesion, but I won't be putting 100% of my effort into matching the canon at every possible venture if I find more narrative potential in an alternative.
And yay glad you're interested in that! That's mostly what I plan to cover over the course of the story anyway.
I'll pass along your compliments to the artist :3
11873825
...oh.
Well, the writer bucked through space-time continuum then. Bucked straight through.
11874228
Don't worry. I got the same sort of complaints on my story whenever my 16 year old protag was considered to still be a young foal in Equestria.
I didn't think it was a big deal either, because it's fantasy, y'know? I never really understood the complaints so I didn't let It bother me. Eventually people get over it and move on.
You've got a nice story beginning here, and I'm interested to see where it goes. Terra is fricking adorable.
P.S - If you ever want some more simple character art for one of your chapters I'd take a crack at it since Terra is so cute I need to practice anyway.
11875536
I think you're confusing, I never said it made the story lame or anything like that, I just gave my point of view!
Even if I don't like an element of a story, I can accept it when it's part of the author's canon, as long as it's a "decorative" element, secondary and not the main one! I'm not a sado masochism to impose me something I don't like! Because, apart from that, I like this story!
I should also have specified that it was more when this kind of thing is announced as canonically official by people (and not by the original creators/authors), when it's not, and that very often, it comes out of nowhere or with so-called "proofs" so vague or convoluted, that it makes the thing ridiculous, that it irritates me! (Especially when you politely ask to prove it, and are aggressively told off in return for daring to contradict the person!)
PS: I also read your story with Flurry, I didn't complain about it! I also like this story, by the way, and I'm looking forward to the sequel! :)
11875536
hehe I’ll definitely keep that in mind :3
And eeee thank u so much!!! Means a lot coming from you :D
Thank u for the offer too!! I’ll definitely let u know when I think a chapter could use some art >:3
P.S. love your fics btw!! Honestly wild seeing you in my comments omg
Finally got around to reading the latest chapter.
Terra's 'What do I look like?' and her surprised pikachu when asked how old she was both caused me to laugh.
I like how she's unintentionally making poor Redheart assume the worst happened to her. And that she hasn't realized that having a child body means dealing with child emotions.
So no one is gonna talk about the age???
11870757
More juice partner = }