• Published 4th Jan 2024
  • 3,618 Views, 249 Comments

Me, Myself and I - Cynical Page



Having a handful of humans stranded in Equestria is bad enough. Being the odd one out of the group for no reason... is even worse. How will Joey Belfort respond to this unfavorable circumstance?

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8 - The Final Straw

A couple days had passed, and the slight euphoria that had been caused from the princess' visit had worn off. Now Joey felt extremely uncertain about what to believe. Celestia had indeed fulfilled her promise to write, as he had received a letter every morning since. He hadn't taken the time to reply, which made him feel slightly guilty, but his mind was more focused on avoiding everyone if possible.

They hadn't come knocking, ironically enough. If Clara really had went and told the whole group about Katy's death, the fact that the princesses had been the only ones to intentionally seek him out was a bit depressing. More than anything, good his attitude had finally been exhausted by the way things had been.

Unfortunately, the chances of an encounter with any of them was high today as Joey paid another visit to the town to shop. He was quite frugal, since he needed to save as much money as he could before moving away. Yes, he had made the decision to eventually leave - to Las Pegasus, of course. He hadn't decided on when, however. Despite having enough money to make the move, he wouldn't last long unless he had enough savings.

Currently he had just finished perusing the shelves of a small crafts store. Grabbing a large sketchbook with plenty of paper, he made the purchase and left. He was no artist by any means, but he had big dreams - and sometimes concept sketching was a brilliant idea to put them on paper to stay.

"Thank you for your business!" said the store owner cheerily as he left. He returned her smile before stepping out onto the street. He had collected for himself some very basic creative supplies, but now he kind of felt like having a coffee. After all, why not treat himself?

He rounded a corner on his way to Sugarcube Corner and ran into a large group. As his poor luck would have it, this group consisted of (nearly) every single person and pony he was trying to avoid. Ginger and Fluttershy were absent, but the rest of Twilight and company were there with the other three humans.

"Joey!" Bill cried out with a cheer before Joey could react. The others turned their heads towards him.

"Er... sorry, I'm busy." Joey said hurriedly and tried to move past the group without incident. Unfortunately, Bill caught him at the arm.

"Hey man... don't be like that." Bill pleaded. "You just disappeared after the Gala."

"Don't be like that?" Joey repeated, raising his eyebrows.

"It's so good to see you out and about!" Twilight intervened, clearly trying to cut through the awkward tensions. "Are you doing alright?"

"Does it make any difference?" Joey asked curtly.

Twilight recoiled a bit, looking slightly confused and hurt. "I - you - yes? It does?"

Joey regarded her expressionlessly. "Huh. Okay."

"Why are you being a jerk? What did we do?" Bill asked heatedly.

"I've got things to do." Joey replied tiredly. His tone didn't go unnoticed.

"Darling, you look positively exhausted!" Rarity piped up, trotting over to him. "We were worried about you, you left without telling anyone!"

"I needed time to myself." he replied, shoving off Bill's grasp on him. "It wasn't anything personal."

"It was reeeaaaallly sad when we found out you left!" Pinkie squeaked. "Clara told us about your sister, which made it even worse..."

"Just forget it, okay??" Joey replied sharply, shooting a nasty glare in Clara's direction. Her expression was also unreadable. "I already know she disregards privacy for people she doesn't like."

"Excuse me?" Clara snapped, scowling. "The princesses practically forced me."

"I honestly don't care." Joey said with a very stony look. "You don't treat the fact she died with any respect anymore. You've been using the fact that Katy used to bully you as a reason to make sure I'm miserable. At this point, I don't even care if you were bullied. I don't feel bad for you in the slightest after everything."

"Joey!" Twilight said in a scolding tone, astonished. Rarity and Pinkie stood there with their mouths open while Applejack looked super uncomfortable.

"No." Joey growled, taking a step back. He was feeling furious after her reaction. "I've done my best to ignore you and to put up with your immature, shitty attitude, Clara. My sister's death is clearly a joke to you. Clearly no one is going to hold your bitch-ass responsible for your awful behavior, but I'm not stupid. This is no longer MY problem. This is a YOU problem. So just try fucking off and leave me alone so we don't have to keep yelling at each other like this!"

"Joey! Language!!" Twilight said sternly. Clara looked at the ground, seeming unable to argue with Joey.

He paused, staring at her blankly. Was she actually being serious? After a long tense moment, he just sighed. "The fact that I just said all these things and you're upset about the fact that I swore? You made your priorities clear."

Twilight's angry look melted into shock and concern. "I - Joey, I didn't mean it like that -"

"You all keep defending her, too." Joey spat. "I'm done being the villain. Just leave me the fuck alone."

"You have no idea how bad she was bullied!" Bill argued, looking very angry himself.

"Maybe I don't, but if you want to try and use that logic to deny everything else that's happened to me then go right ahead." Joey growled in reply. "They told us to all stick together. Quit it with the friendly shit. You guys are so fake I wanna barf."

He turned around and marched away, ignoring their calls for him to come back. There might as well have been steam coming out of his ears. Being ignored and forgotten was at least better than this. What the fuck was Twilight thinking? All of them were so stupid, it pissed him off SO much. He tried so hard to be strong and patient with it, but this was too much.

After all, if he didn't say anything it wouldn't have stopped.

Stepping into his home, he growled as he slammed the door shut behind him. Now that he was starting to calm down, a feeling of hollowness began to seep in. They pretended to care a lot, didn't they? That was the only logical conclusion he could come to. He got admonished for simply swearing, while all she got for using his sister's death as emotional leverage was a slap on the wrists.

His eyes fell on the book lying on the bedside table. The Equestrian Encyclopedia of Entertainment. Before he could formulate another thought, green flames erupted out of the fireplace. A scroll flew out of the flames untouched and settled into his hand. It was from Celestia - but at this time of day?

He opened it up and began to read.

Dear Joey,

I hope you are well. Twilight has sent me a letter detailing an argument that
has just taken place. I understand you are hurt, but I implore you to try to get
along with your fellow human friends. Especially Clara.

~ Best wishes, Celestia.

He stared at the letter, processing the words on the parchment. Suddenly he tore it to pieces and threw them in the empty fireplace. Any feeling of being understood had vanished. Celestia was wise, but he was sick of this situation. How could Celestia be okay with this? All logic seemed to suggest that everyone was siding with Clara. It was an irrational thought, but at this point he was too upset to care.

That was the final straw. He was going to leave as soon as he could.


"The midnight train? Are you sure?" the stallion in the ticket booth asked, looking mildly surprised.

"Positive." Joey confirmed. He had hardly spent any time at home, as soon as he looked at the book he had made up his mind to just buy a ticket. Never mind funds, he would figure that out in Las Pegasus. There surely had to be some sort of job he could work in. Even if it isn't something related to what he wanted to do, he had to at least try.

"Well... it's a five hour trip. If you're sure, then let me get it for you." the stallion replied. "Can I get a name?"

Joey raised an eyebrow. "For a train ticket?"

"Well... yes."

"Am I required to?" Joey pressed.

"Er - no, but -"

"Then just give me the damn ticket." Joey huffed, slamming the appropriate amount of bits on the counter. The stallion hurriedly got him his ticket and bid him farewell. Slipping it into his pocket, Joey began walking home.

"Train leaves at midnight... it's currently four in the afternoon..." Joey muttered to himself as he walked. He would hardly have any time to pack, but then again he didn't have much with him. Leaving at midnight would allow him to be discreet. If possible he wanted to leave this town completely unnoticed, that way no one could follow him and bother him in another location.

"Joey...?"

He had been so lost in thought he hadn't even noticed the orange farm pony trying to get his attention.

"Joey!"

He nearly jumped out of his skin to find Applejack standing there. She wasn't smiling, nor did she look concerned. Just... sad. For some reason the simplicity of it made it more believable. She just stared at him for a couple moments before saying something.

"Ah've been thinking about things for a while now. Namely how Ah've sided with Clara." she began nervously.

"So you did side with her." Joey deadpanned.

Applejack sighed. "It wasn't the right thing to do. Ah knew her better than I knew you, sugarcube. Ah didn't even realize I was doin' it at first, either. Then Ah hit ya... that was wrong too."

"Sounds like you kept that part out when you guys told Celestia the story." Joey said shrewdly.

"Ah did tell her, after our meeting was over." Applejack answered strongly. Joey could tell she was serious. "Listen... Ah'm just trying to say that Ah'm sorry. For hitting ya, for disregarding the whole story, all of it. I don't blame ya if yer mad, sugarcube. Ah just wanted to let ya know that Ah believe you aren't wrong. Ah'd get my mane all in a knot if all that stuff happened too."

"Um... thanks." Joey said slowly. "Also, what do you mean by... 'that stuff'?"

"When ya went and lost yer cool earlier." she replied. "Ah don't blame ya, and I think when ya called Twi out for getting all tuckered over the foul language, it hit me. All my priorities were wrong."

"That's... unexpected." Joey said, blinking. "You were so ready to defend Clara before even hearing me out."

"Ah still believe that there are two wrongs here, sugarcube." Applejack sighed. "Ah definitely think Clara needs to cut it out. Especially about yer sister. If anypony understands losing family like that it ain't her."

Joey turned to her. The orange country mare seemed to be struggling to say something, as if she were trying to convince herself to say whatever it was. He remained silent, feeling half curious and half skeptical of what she might say.

"Ah... Ah know what it's like to lose family." she finally managed.

"You - what?" Joey stammered. That was not what he was expecting to hear.

"Yup. My ma and pa died when I was a lil' filly." she opened up. "It was real hard on my family. Granny Smith cried for weeks. That was when my brother Big Mac stopped talking as much. Applebloom was a little baby."

"I don't know any of those ponies, if I'm being honest..." Joey said apologetically. "I'm really sorry to hear that, though... I know that wasn't easy for you guys."

"That's besides the point, it's done and over. Ma and pa wouldn't want the rest of us to spend every day moping about them. My point was that Ah understand how ya feel. Or close to how ya feel, anyhow. Ah really am sorry for being a rotten bag of apples to ya. Can ya forgive me?"

Joey took a deep breath. "I appreciate you trusting me enough to be that open. I forgive you, but I don't rally trust you. Or your friends. Or anyone, really. I don't know about being friends with any of you right now."

Applejack smiled, rather than protesting. "Ah understand, sugarcube. Take all the time ya need. Lemme know if they start causing trouble for ya again, Ah'll have yer back."

"I - wow. Thanks." Joey stuttered. For some reason that hit home. "I'll keep that in mind. Thanks for talking to me, Applejack."

They exchanged goodbyes, and Joey left back home. He didn't feel as angry anymore, but that didn't deter him. It was too late anyway, he had bought a ticket. The unfortunate truth here was that he had tried building a relationship on multiple different occasions with multiple different ponies, and all of them ended up siding with Clara at one point or another. Even after that talk with Applejack (as much as he appreciated it) he didn't know who to trust.

Even Celestia sided with Clara. She was caring, yes, but that didn't change the fact that once again it felt like he had been pushed aside. It always had to be his fault.

"I hope the ponies in Las Pegasus aren't this bad..."


Joey was very pleased once he realized that for the second time in a row he had an entire train car to himself once again. This time there were no normal seats, but booths and tables. Once he sat down he noticed a food menu. He wouldn't be buying anything, he ate before coming to the station.

The engine whistled in the distance, and the train lurched into motion. As it picked up speed, he watched Ponyville slowly pass out of sight. Once it faded into the night, he pulled a notebook out of his bag and began to jot down ideas. Dreams. Potential goals. Anything he might be interested in, any new concepts and stories he could bring from the human world that they didn't already have in this world. Anything that may help him.

Despite leaving trouble behind, he was still a little scared about the future.

Author's Note:

I've been seeing this story pop up on the featured page every time I release a chapter. I've read so many comments of you all relating to Joey. I'm so glad this little side project of mine is speaking to you guys. Just wanted to make that known :)