"Ah, thank you all for coming," Celestia said, waving a hoof at the approaching ponies. Rainbow and Fluttershy kept exchanging worried glances, and occasionally whispering something to one another.
All six of the ponies stood in front of a window, peeking into the room of a unicorn... Twilight Sparkle. She had a nightgown on and was laying in the hospital bed. Several machines flashed behind her, monitoring her breathing and heart beat. Celestia gazed at the unicorn sadly. Rarity nervously straightened her mane, as if Twilight was looking at them. Rainbow Dash poked the glass, receiving a donk! and a glare from the Princess. Pinkie hopped in place, looking across the hospital hallways and into Twilight's room with interest. Fluttershy and Applejack stood near the back of the small crowd, quietly shuffling their hooves and looking at the floor.
"So who exactly IS this mare, Princess?" Rarity asked, breaking the silence.
"Her name, as you can see, is Twilight Sparkle," Celestia said, gesturing to a name card on the door, "And somehow, she KNOWS you all. I have a few guesses about how."
"Um... what is it, then? If you don't mind telling us, um... that is," Fluttershy said, barely making eye contact with anypony.
"Why, of course. You see, Twilight here has extremely strong magic. Definitely strong enough to, say, pass my school's entrance exam. But for some reason... it backfired. It hit her brain, causing severe damage. She's lost all of her memories. However, she still can use magic," Celestia said, glancing at the group, "it seems to me that she's been able to use telepathy to ' see ' what's going on around her. Ponies with her power can listen to the thoughts of others at the maximum of 100 miles away. Since this hospital is very close to where you all live... it just makes sense she could ' hear and see ' what you all are doing."
Fluttershy let out a gasp.
"But why us, Princess?" Applejack asked.
"I'm afraid that I don't know, my friend. It's a very interesting case."
Everypony continued to look at the Princess, awaiting further input. Silence spread across them, and they tried to process all of this information.
Rainbow Dash finally spoke up. "So what you're saying is, like, she can basically hear and feel what we think? And like, she knows who we all are?" She left out the question they were all thinking. She thinks she's our... friend?
"Yes. I couldn't have said it better myself."
"Do any of ya'll high-tech ponies know what exactly she's thinkin'? Just so we can get 'n idea?" Applejack asked.
"Actually, we do. We've got all of her thoughts about you 5, Princess Luna, and I recorded," Celestia turned to look at a nurse, quietly standing nearby, "Would you please get those for me?"
"Y-yes, Princess Celestia," the nurse replied, then hurried off to another room.
Silence over them again, all standing awkwardly in the hallway. Every once in a while they would receive a little wave from a passing doctor or nurse.
"While we're waiting... " Rarity said, startling them all, "How many of us actually know each other? I, of course know Pinkie... and Applejack. But what about you all?"
"I know Fluttershy. We were in flight camp together," Rainbow Dash proclaims, then looks at Pinkie, "I also know Pinkie Pie. I mean, who doesn't know Pinkie though?"
"That's right! I know everypony! And knowing everypony is cool, because that means you have a lot of friends! And having a lot of friends means that everypony likes you! And that means -" Applejack waves her hoof in Pinkie's face, knowing she won't stop unless someone forces her to.
"Ah know Rarity, " Applejack says, "We were at a party. Ah was sellin' apple foods, and she was showin' off in a dress she made. Ah also know Pinkie from the sweet shop. Ah was buyin' frosting."
"Hey! I was not showing off, I was simply letting others admire my fashion skills," Rarity retorted, glaring at Applejack. She fluffed her mane and turned her back to Applejack.
"Showin' off," Applejack muttered, rolling her eyes.
"Oooh! I know Rarity from a party, Rainbow Dash from around town, Fluttershy from the store. Also Applejack from the store," Pinkie interrupts, just as Rarity opens her mouth to reply to Applejack.
"I know Rainbow Dash... from flight camp," Fluttershy says quietly. "And Pinkie... from the store. But we only talked one time."
Celestia nodded to herself. So they're already acquaintances. This makes matters easier, she thought.
Pinkie interrupts once again, talking about cake flavors and icing while Rarity looks at her with disgust, probably imagining all the ways her dresses could be ruined by them.
"Hey! We've never introduced ourselves," Rainbow Dash says loudly, cutting off Pinkie, "I mean, we know who knows each other and stuff, but we don't know anything about each other!"
Applejack nods, than starts to speak. "Makes sense. Then ah'll go first. Ah work at Sweet Apple Acres, with my little sis Apple Bloom, my brother Big Macintosh, and Granny Smith."
I own Carousel Boutique, " says Rarity. " I make dresses and such."
"I work at Sugar Cube Corner! I get to make cakes, and candy, and taffy, and cupcakes, and all sorts of sweet stuff! "Pinkie says next, happily bouncing.
"I take care of animals at my home... " Fluttershy says next," I get to heal little sick creatures. "
"And I'm, " Everypony turns to look at Rainbow Dash, "On the weather crew! I'm also the ONLY pony to ever pull off a Sonic Rainboom."
Everypony gasps.
"Wow, that must've been super amazingly AWESOME!" Pinkie says, cheerfully looking at Rainbow Dash, who was grinning, "I wish I could've seen it!"
Princess Celestia chuckle to herself. They seemed to already know each other very well, even though they had just met. Celestia saw somepony walking over to them out of the corner of her eye. A nurse was walking over, bringing the records.
"Ah, here comes the papers," Celestia says, levitating the papers from the nurse and over to the group of onlooking ponies.
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Okay, so that's the end of chapter one. Um... let me know if you like it. Comments are welcome. Chapter 2 is coming soon.
Also, this is the first thing I've ' published ' on here! WOO!
This is probably gonna hit the feature bar. Called it!
1375615 I hope so
Will read this later.
And yes, weird ideas is hard not to write.
I got a idea for a new fiction in the shower. But I am stuck on how to write the characters.
This can get pretty interesting... Favourited!
Hmm, I find this interesting. You got a fav here.
This has a lot of potential, and very little errors. Good show! I assume the crossover part becomes apparent in the later chapters...
Humm looking good so far and I can't wait for the next chapter
Following for now but no thumbs up until I know where this is going and know I'm going to like it.
Hmmmmmm... Go on... I'm interested.
Is "Twilight wakes up and her whole life's been a dream" becoming a new genre or something 'cause I'm seeing it a lot.
Interesting concept and interesting story. I shall keep an eye on this story.
This has me interested, gonna keep an eye on this :D
Interesting....
Potential, lots of potential. One thing though: Princess Luna. How did she come in this? I mean, as far as I know, she should still be Nightmare Moon or on the Moon. If the Mane 6 have yet to meet, how did Nightmare Moon become Luna again if the Elements of Harmony were never united? Without Twilight Sparkle, the Elements aren't complete. Maybe you should drop Princess Luna for now, unless this is en alternative reality in which Luna never became Nightmare Moon.
Good luck further!
this could lead to something extremely sweet and, as it can to something really sad an , never the less it is an interesting concept.
Very good concept! Executed pretty well, but just work on your grammar. (I had an idea like this once, but I switched it to a different one. you might like it. lol I love this one though!)
Pretty good idea, can't wait to see how it develops
Intriguing. Favorited.
This story is intriguing! I'll be sure to read more!
1375945 Haha, yeah. Been seeing a lot of stuff like this.
It's an interesting idea, and you have a whole lot to work with to make a really entertaining story, but you should fix spacing on quotes and indentations are recommended. Also, you have some syntax and tense issues (switches from past to present about 3/4's of the way through).
My friend, you need an editor.
Hire me.
Hire me now.
Hire Me Now.
HIRE ME NOW.
HIRE ME NOW!
HIRE ME NOW, DAMMIT, NOW!
...sorry, I get that way. Message me for more info.
1375770 Which story is it?
1375945 It's the "Fifty Shades" (probably not called that but it did happen quickly with that series) syndrome all over again. It's when one genre becomes popular and then everyone starts doing it.
1375667 Author has the mistake everywhere.
1376060 The story has the "Alternate Universe" tag so Nightmare Moon probably never happened (but still might .)
Notes to the Author:
I can't favourite yet, Author, (too early) but I will keep an eye on it. You change from past tense to present tense in the middle of the story. In "AppleJack", the "j" isn't capitalised. Also, what's with the spacing before and after quotation marks? I don't mean to sound (well, "read" seems more appropriate) brash but I really can't find a way to make it read nicer.
Very interesting concept there, I will definetly keep track of this :) Oh and by the way: I think you're doing a great job at capturing each individual personality in the dialogue lines.
Didn't expect so many views already!
So... concerns.
The Applejack/AppleJack thing. Fixed it in the first chapter, also fixed the quotation space thing.
The Luna/Nightmare Moon thing. Eheh, I hit the tag button accidentally. It will be explained later in the story.
The dream stories. I only read like, one of those, and it was like, two months ago. I've never even heard of 'Fifty Shades', but I'm seriously not trying to copy anything.
Other stuff.
Wow, thanks for all of the positive feedback, people! It really helps. Hopefully I do make it up to the feature bar.
t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRCoY485X4JspmeubdioY4R4kxb0NFZFTXqUA-2xZPSvy2N1M2HNUxxXmASrA TAKE YOUR CEREAL PONY. TAKE IT.
Anyways, second chapter will come out ASAP!
freaking more
I guess it's pointless to ask this about a cancelled story, but: "Crossover" with what?