The light shine across my face as the morning light shines.
I smile and got up, only to grimly frown when I see the same white void I always see when I looked outside.
Yesterday was real. The words Celestia said still echoed in my head.
“I am sorry Jumper, there’s nothing we can do.”
I wanted to yelled at her, I wanted it to be a lie, a joke, I wanted to be angry at her.
But I can't blame her.
“Its ok Celestia... you tried.” I weakly said. a pain came across my chest as I clutch it with my hand.
Damn it, it hurts more than I anticipated.
I didn't bother to brush my teeth as I change into my usual clothes. I went down stairs, seeing the portraits on the walls as I went to the kitchen.
I wasn't in the mood to cook anything today so I just eat instant noodles for breakfast.
I decided to check the garage so I entered the garage. I see my car just parked there, normally when I feel down I drive around the city with it. However the garage door, just like the windows, were jammed and unbreakable.
I rummage through the junk I stored in the garage, after a few minutes of searching I found it. My first photo album.
I went through each pages, each filled with precious memories from back home with my parents, celebrating my friends birthday parties, and a vacation to the beach.
I couldn't hold back as a tear dropped on the page.
I am sorry.
Angel Bunny [POV]
Angel Bunny was worried, not as much as when he thinks about Fluttershy's safely but worried none the less.
Staring infront of the massive door, he thought about what happened the other day.
Jumper, a friend of his. He came back inside her cottage, he entered his hone without looking or saying a word to us.
That look of his when I saw him.
I remember what Fluttershy told me yesterday about Jumper. Don’t worry Angel, he just needs some space.
He needs more than that. That look on his face, is a face of loss, grief.
The same look that I once had before when I look at my reflection from the river.
Honestly, if I didn't meet Fluttershy, I doubt I would've made it this far.
I really don't know what to do, how can I help him?
*Sighed* I just hope he doesn't go down the path I once took.
Lyra Heartstrings [POV]
I sat on the same bench, where I have first talked with Jumper.
Its been about a three days since Nightmare Moon's defeat. Jumper hasn't shown up in our usual meeting spot. I remember back at the celebration, Jumper was talking with Princess Celestia. I hadn't heard much from what they said but whatever it was, it left him heartbroken.
Thinking back to our conversations we had. everytime we talked, a reoccurring topic always pops up.
Family.
His face shows more expression when he talks about them. His mood shine gold like a lyre.
My best guess is that it has something to do with family.
From what I could see back at the celebration, its like he loss something very important to him.
If that's the case, I know how you feel Jumper.
Viola... sister where are you?
Button Mash [POV]
I sat in the middle of town, playing with my GameColt as always. I turn to look around, Mr Monkey Man hasn't shown up yet.
Its been a week, I wondered where he is?
Speaking of Mr Monkey Man, I don't understand why ponies don't like him. I heard them call him a monster who can mind... control? Whatever that means, and a bunch of other nasty stuff.
Mr Monkey Man isn't a bad pony, he is just like anypony else, hay he even plays video games, there's no such thing as a monster who plays video games.
We talked about strategies, cheat codes, a bunch of video game stuff really. The hoofheld device he has, he said that it was a gift from his dad.
I haven't met my dad yet so I don't know how it feels. He really loves his dad and really misses him, it makes me wonder how would I feel for my dad if I ever got to meet him.
When I told mommy about dad, she said that he is never coming back, mommy seems so sad, I don't know why.
Why is he never coming back?
Fluttershy [POV]
Everyday I get more concerned for Jumper, its been a week and he hasn't come out of his house.
It must've been really devastated for him to learned that.
I tried knocking on his door but he wouldn't answer, I can't get in because he locked it.
I was tending to my animals when Angel tapped on my hoof, I looked down to see him pointing at a window.
Confused, I looked outside to see Jumper. He was walking away from my cottage. I turn to Angel who gives me a look in his eyes, I understand what he wants me to do.
I exited my cottage and follow him, eventually he stopped at a hill as he sits down to look at Ponyville.
I sit next to him, he turns and jumps in surprised. “Oh... its just you Fluttershy.” He said.
“Jumper...” I said. “I am worried about you, Lyra is worried about you to. You haven’t come out of your home for a week now,” I turn to look at him with a determined look. “If you have something, I will listen.”
He just looks at me and sighs. “Its hard Fluttershy, being stranded in this world forever is hard. Away from my family, my friends, the life I had before I suddenly lost them.” He turns towards Ponyville. ”I don’t know how or why I am sent here, I have devices that I can use to contact my family, yet I can't, I feel like it was mocking me.” He rubs his eye. “I already accepted that I may possibly stay here permanently the moment I stepped in Equestria. It just hurts alot when it actually happened.” I lean against him. As we take a few moments to look over Ponyville.
“Do you feel better now that you let it all out?” I asked. He smiles abit.
“It does feel a bit lighter. I can’t be like this forever, the pain may never go away, but at least I have you.” He stands up and so do I.
We then went back to my cottage and we have dinner together before he goes to bed.
I do hope he should try to change a few things that's reaally stupid. Like idk, introduce Zecora to Twilight or the other ponies early and call them out for being racists.
11672338
This very thing has caused me to rewrite my version of this part. I literally have to skip over this part, thus pushing forward the narrative with my characters. I mean, I do not want any sort of Plagiarism in my fics!
11672844
That's what I'm talking about, if a plot similar to the one in the show needs to happen for yours to advance, at least you have to do everything possible so that it doesn't feel the same, adding new dialogues, different facts or that the OC on duty does something relevant, instead of standing there doing nothing, while the mane 6 do everything the same as has already been seen on the show. Not making a cheeky transcription like the one my friend who daydreams did.
I don't know why some writers think it's a good idea to do that, it's not even something the "author" wrote, it was written by someone from Hasbro.
Mother of Celestia, the worst thing is that no one says anything and they continue to praise this story, is it as if no one had seen the first episode of the series of which all of us here are fans?
Don't you all want the guy to grow as a writer? Because if you all continue like this, the dude will remain on the path of mediocrity
11672994
The point of any fanfic is to tell another version of the canon, regardless if you are using an OC, or the story characters. It must be original to you.
I do like this author's idea. They merely need to edit it, so it reads as original, not a copy. That is one reason why a dissertation is hard to write, especially if one is using another person's writings as a source for your idea. It's even worse for a Mathematics dissertation...
11673050
That's a good option, the author would have to edit almost everything he "wrote", or delete the parts where the dude plagiarize something, which would be equivalent to 200 words of the 8000 that there are.
Simply embarrassing. I hope the author didn't do the same with the 200 episodes still had to transcribe.
I guess that would explain why some people hate the stories of humans in Equestria, for stories like this.
And about the OCs, I have no problem with them being added, the grace is that their presence makes many changes in the story that we all already know, but if you see the first chapter of FIM and read this, it feels the same, for that the character that is supposed to be the main one, Jumper, remains in the background, for trying to copy everything.
11673085
Dear Celestia, I hope this fic won't last 200 chapters...
11673226
I hope that doesn't happen too, he would be falling very low, worse than what he is already doing now. It depends on the kid if he wants to continue plagiarizing or not, if continues like this, probably this story gonna be taken down, I'm completely sure the dude already read our comments.
i.pinimg.com/564x/12/7d/70/127d708dc96dffa7b8118be4de201fc2.jpg
11672994
I'd like to correct you on this. Just because someone STARTs off a fic by doing absolutely nothing doesn't inherently make it bad or plagiarism. It's like saying all reaction videos are. However, the addition of creative commentary (in this case his jokes and shiz, I guess?) makes it not in the category of plagiarism. To Andy hunter, what you can do is have him REFLECT on what he has see so far and determine what he should do. While a guy could keep watching plot events unfold, he won't do it forever, as human being are curious animals, and animals who want to partake in something the more they see it(as evidence, your fanfiction). Due to this reason, character development is a must. Watching something and offering commentary, while not plagiarism, its still bland in the end, like a youtube reaction video. Remember, while he has knowledge of the plot, there is still stuff going on behind the show, so you could add in plot along side and just use the episodes as a landmark of some sort. Moreover, another problem here is the cultural and altitude difference, ponies will inherently find our cynicism weird, and that's a fact. Here's an ongoing RWBY SI that you could use as some sort of a example:
https://forums.spacebattles.com/threads/a-southern-yankee-in-the-valean-court-rwby-si.1110054/
PS:run your stuff through grammarly, could fix a few errors.
Wait… couldn’t you have somepony teleport that out? It might work, and you’d be the only being in Equus to have a car!
good chapter