Wow, this has gotten off to a roaring start! There's just one thing it needs, and that's some actual comments on the content! Seriously, folks, I've been enjoying the back-and-forth in replies, but how about some commentary on the story itself?
AJA has left longpost after longpost on my works over the years, giving running feedback on my chapters, and they're some of my favorite comments just for how involved and funny they can be. In some small way, I'll return the favor here.
Ebon, Sorry for leaving you in the dark (literally).
That's okay, Umbreon. You're already a dark-type anyway!
I’m hoping someone’s discovered a new continent or something so we can have a change of scenery for once.
Sadly, all recently discovered portals only go to places like Narnia or Middle Earth. And those are too boring for words.
So why not just quit? I admit the thought has occurred to me more than once. But then I think about how much Glassie would hate not having violence to dish out and how awkward it would be to tell Sike we’re retiring just after recruiting her. And that’s not even considering how hard you’d take it. Oh, just listen to me ranting onto the paper. I’m sorry to dump my frustrations like that onto you, love.
No you're not, Leafy.
To get back on topic, we’re also hanging with the old guildies to try to get Sike to come out of her shell.
The espeons I’ve met have all tended to be deep and introverted like her, particularly the ones raised by non-espeons. I guess that’s the cost of being as highly specialized as we eevees are — we’re also highly confusing, even to our own family. I’d probably feel awkward around others too, honestly.
For as much as I love Umbreon, I think it's the Espeon I most relate to. Given her ability to power up from sunlight, I wonder if she and Celly would get along?
Wherever you decide to send us, please don’t forget to grab an escape orb at the bank in case things go to heck!
Or Equestria. Whichever.
Ebon just thought she was impossibly cute with her forked tail and amazing flanks. If she weren’t so shy and he wasn’t her boss, he might forgo taking Sike to mystery dungeons and just train her in bed.
So name her the team's chief morale officer!
Glassie the glaceon had come from humble beginnings, serving as an artificial snow maker for a ski-resort in Kanto — a fate that she’d confided had been such torment for her, she had recurring nightmares of somehow ending up being forced to do it again if for some reason she couldn’t go exploring anymore.
I'm sure Luna will find the dreams of Pokemon interesting, if she hasn't already. "Princess Cadance! By our starry mane, why dost thou insist on contacting these strange creatures? Their dreams are filled with nothing but food, fighting, and rutting each other senseless!"
"And this is different from the average pegasus, how...?"
The village also had a completely justified reputation for being tolerant of inbreeding and incestuous pairings.
Ebon? Edelweiss? I invite you to visit the realm of Thestralslovakia...
If these outsider pokémon knew Ebon had been ‘slipping his sister the bone’ and ‘tying her in knots’ from time to time, he could expect to find his own face on a wanted poster.
WANTED: Bred and alive.
If his teammates were normally some of the most beautiful pokémon to ever live, they looked even better with wet fur.
What about you, big boi?
Next on Ebon’s to-do list was the overflowing trash can next to the ice stone-powered freezer he put Edelweiss’s letter into. No use leaving evidence of their less-than-platonic relationship for the others.
That's an easy fix. But when her love juices drip to the ground and cause plants to sprout, that's a little harder to hide.
Glassie had apparently finished off the last of her Hoggin’ Pawz half-gallon carton of ice cream
Nice! That definitely wasn't there when I first preread the story.
“Arceus, darn it, Glassie!”
Never use His Name in vain, or he might descent and smite you. Or at least cause something embarrassing to happen, like being discovered having sex with your sister.
“I really need to get laid. I really, really, really need to get laid.” Ebon whimpered to himself
You and me both, Umbie. You and me both.
“Weird. The post doesn’t even run today.” A strange excitement gripped him as he pondered the implications. “Could it be… Wonder Mail? No way…”
Well, since I'm pretty sure the Gryphon Express Courier Service doesn't yet run out that way...
House rules stated that everyone washes their dishes immediately after using one and as leader of Team Allure, he had to live by example.
That's my rule too, but since I live alone, motivation is lacking to do it. I let my dishes pile up way too often.
“This is incredible! I thought the secret rank thing was a joke!” He gave a whooping cheer and he leapt into the air on all fours.
I would too, given it came with a plastic decoder ring that looked like it came out of a crackerjack box.
His team had once rescued a scizor from a lovestruck froslass, and it’d granted him and his team the ‘secret rank’ which would allow for missions to be sent for his eyes only
His eyes scanned over the letter. It was an invitation to explore a mystery dungeon he’d never heard of called ‘Ponyta Passage’
Oh, come on, Umbie--I'm sure you've I've wanted to explore a Ponyta's passage yourself over the years.
“The bag's a little heavier than when I picked it up at the hideout. Kek the Kecleon’s Shop had a great deal on reviver seeds today so I bought them all!”
You'd better have! All his stuff is Top Kek.
silently cursing his luck and backing away as Glassie strutted up to the two of them like the mayor of Treasure Town.
*boss music plays*
“No, I’m not okay!” Sike sat down huffily, slashing her tail angrily behind her. “Glassie tried talking some bidoof into asking me out and he did!”
Ebon knew this particular bidoof, a rodent-like pokémon with large buck teeth. A nice guy if rather unsophisticated in his mannerisms.
“Glassie, I know you mean well, but you need to consult with your teammate before trying to pass her off like an unwanted hold item you pulled out of a nicket’s hoard,” Ebon said sarcastically. “I mean, do you even know if she likes guys?”
A dimension away, Roseluck didn't understand why she felt suddenly mortified and a terrible urge to faint.
Arceus, I am a stupid idiot. Ebon thought to himself. He didn’t know what he hated himself for more at that moment — that he was an unwitting participant in Glassie’s bullying or that he still hoped deep down he’d have a chance to rut the beautiful espeon senseless someday, especially given she was genuinely curious about her sexuality.
You know perfectly well that all she needs is a big, powerful, well-endowed Umbreon to sweep her off her paws, Ebon.
He blinked and shook his head at the thought. Check that — a stupid, horny idiot who still needs to get laid, badly.
That's me two weeks after getting fresh testosterone pellets implanted.
“Yeah, I’m sorry… I guess.” Glassie grated practically through her teeth. “But speaking of scoring some action, where are we going today, boss? Hopefully somewhere with a lot of grass and ground types for those sweet, sweet type-advantage criticals. I wanna wreck some faces!”
Is this our lovely Glassie or my version of Limestone Pie?
Ebon imagined an entire brood of Glassie’s brown-and-tan striped eggs surrounding them in a candle-lit circle, each resting in their own nest of straw. The glaceon begging for just one more eevee as his erection sank deep inside her again and again — the whole room soon overflowing with eggs. He knew he’d have to stop eventually but his hardness never faltered as he seed instantly replenished with each climax.
“EBON!”
"Yes, scream my name, Glassie..."
"WHAT?"
"Huh? Oh, Nothing..."
“But enough of that. Actually, I have some fantastic news to deliver to you all. Give me your maps. I need to update them.”
“Update them? What do you mean, Ebon?” Edelweiss asked, before she pawed over the map she’d stowed in her leafy green chest fluff.
Just wait until Pinkpie starts pulling stuff out there Edelweiss doesn't even remember being put in!
I'm greatly enjoying all the added detail so far, and all the sexual tension in this group. I foresee absolutely no indulgences taking place on this most platonic of Eevee teams. Nope, nothing at all...
AJA has left longpost after longpost on my works over the years, giving running feedback on my chapters, and they're some of my favorite comments just for how involved and funny they can be. In some small way, I'll return the favor here.
It was my pleasure!
Sadly, all recently discovered portals only go to places like Narnia or Middle Earth. And those are too boring for words.
Cadance noped the fuck out once she was obligated to deal with Tom Bombadil's bullshit.
There's going to be something snapping on her, though!
For as much as I love Umbreon, I think it's the Espeon I most relate to. Given her ability to power up from sunlight, I wonder if she and Celly would get along?
I imagine that if Sike were a shiny form Espeon, she really would be a green new deal.
Or Equestria. Whichever.
Po-tay-to, po-taw-to. Horse pussy, canid knots. Variety is the spice of life.
I'm sure Luna will find the dreams of Pokemon interesting, if she hasn't already. "Princess Cadance! By our starry mane, why dost thou insist on contacting these strange creatures? Their dreams are filled with nothing but food, fighting, and rutting each other senseless!"
"And this is different from the average pegasus, how...?"
I can totally hear this conversation!
Ebon? Edelweiss? I invite you to visit the realm of Thestralslovakia...
We've been spending most our lives, livin' in an incest paradise...
WANTED: Bred and alive.
Eyyyyy!
That's an easy fix. But when her love juices drip to the ground and cause plants to sprout, that's a little harder to hide.
I'm getting FRI flashbacks. Maybe I should add that later...
Glassie had apparently finished off the last of her Hoggin’ Pawz half-gallon carton of ice cream
Nice! That definitely wasn't there when I first preread the story.
Come get some, ladies. There's enough of me to go around! Mrrrooowr.
Is this our lovely Glassie or my version of Limestone Pie?
Yes.
Yes, scream my name, Glassie..."
"WHAT?"
"Huh? Oh, Nothing..."
It would be funny if that scene kept going!
I'm greatly enjoying all the added detail so far, and all the sexual tension in this group. I foresee absolutely no indulgences taking place on this most platonic of Eevee teams. Nope, nothing at all...
It's just four young, fit, eeveelutions with ungodly massive ears going on adventures in an AJ Aficionado story...
“‘Ponyta Passage’?” Sike replied slowly, repeating back the words as if they were spoken in some foreign language. “It’s filled with ponyta, I presume?”
Or it gets filled by other Eevees, Sike.
“Completely understandable, bruh… I mean boss,” Edelweiss quickly added as Ebon cringed slightly.
Can a girl have a bruh moment? I say yes.
“Just my luck they’d have a type-advantage over me. Not that it’ll save them from my blizzard!” A breeze wicked past them, sending a plume of powdery snow from off of Glassie’s back and into the air.
Rainbow Dash would like this girl. I could see her challenging Glassie to a weather control contest.
“I don’t know what lives there, Sike. The message didn’t say and it sorta… caught fire and burned up after my map updated,” Ebon replied delicately.
"It's my fault, though. I'm just too hot an Umbreon."
<gets promptly frozen by an eyerolling Glassie>
“I find the only real item you can truly rely on to save your hide in all situations is the escape orb,” Sike opined. “Retreat is sometimes the best strategy.”
Glassie turned to look at Ebon, clearly upset that she’d had to swap out ‘hail’ for ‘water spout’.
“Stupid, water-type move…” Glassie grumbled, walking away from the Electrivire Link shop. “I feel like such a sell-out…”
Glassie's a class-traitor! And you know what that means!
They wouldn’t have to worry about food and shelter during the six-month-long journey it’d take to get there, but he knew he and his party were going to be really sore before it was all over.
If you know what I mean...
Six and a half months later, their destination came within sight of Team Allure’s caravan.
They were two weeks late because Ebon and Edelweiss kept sleeping in each morning for reasons they weren't at liberty to disclose.
Previous experience had taught Ebon and his team that once you got a glimpse of the kangaskhan statue — a magical access portal to the bank account back in Treasure Town — you’d found the entrance to your mystery dungeon. This particular statue was set in front of a wide-open cave mouth that let up into the mountain; not for the first time he wondered how statues had been transported out there in the first place.
Enslaved house elves from Harry Potter.
“Oh, what is it now, Glassie?” Sike said irritably. “What is your counterpoint to this? Do you think he should be sleeping with all of us? Maybe we can all be evaluated on how well we can suck his…his…”
“His what?” Glassie replied with all the false sweetness of a smiling mawile.
Perfect image.
“Sike, I know you don’t like reading other pokémon’s minds because you prefer not to know what they’re thinking so I’m going to spell it out for you: You’re breathtakingly gorgeous and Ebon has noticed.”
Thank God girls can't read guys' minds. If they could and were in charge, we'd all be locked up for life.
Glassie continued speaking as if she’d heard nothing. “He’s noticed all of us are beautiful, sexual creatures and in his mind, he’s imagined having sex with all three of us. Am I wrong? Tell me, Ebon. Just answer me this one question. Am I wrong?”
Yes. I want to have sex with all three of you at once! he just caught himself from saying out loud, only to remember that Sike could read minds. He looked up to see her cheeks go pale, then bright red as she took several involuntary steps back from him...
I jest. Ebon's trying so hard to be honorable here, but it only makes him all the more desirable.
As she spoke, Glassie’s voice became higher and higher pitched as if she were genuinely in fear. “And to top it all off, their ribbons are all swaying at once! Like they could just jam every one of them inside of you at any moment and no one will even hear you scream!”
Glassie’s head whipped around and looked outside at the growing darkness behind them as if half-expecting an assault of amorous sylveons at any moment.
So Glassie has a weakness other than fire types! Well, you don't have to worry, Glassie. They'd go right past your shaking form and make a beeline for Ebon as an Umbreon anyway, ravaging him with tongue and tendril mercilessly.
Admittedly, the idea of being cornered by a sex-crazed sylveon and taken advantage of did give the weaker-typed umbreon a bit of a thrill which he quickly squelched. That was just a silly obsession and no one else had to know about it.
That and being photographed while it's happening with his helplessness displayed for all to see.
“That was… a most unusual turn of events, I must say,” Edelweiss said in surprise understatement as Ebon could only stare. “But not entirely unwelcome!”
“I take it that you’re thanking me, then,” Glassie replied, frowning back at her.
Edelweiss sighed. “Yes, I suppose I am. Just be gentle with her, okay? This is progress for her, but it can all be ruined in an instant if you push her too far.”
Ebon nodded his agreement, finally finding his voice again. “You’re also going to tell her that this… encounter of yours is a one-time thing so she doesn’t expect wedding bells to come out of all of this.”
Glassie winced. “Yeah, I know how this looks. Just have a little faith in me, okay? You two are the ones who need to go slow and take it easy.”
Thanks for including this sequence. It defines the characters and grounds the story in at least a little more realism to start.
"Ebon looks thick enough to breed a zoroark!"
Or maybe an Alicorn Princess several times his size...
“Brother?”
“Yes, Edelweiss?”
“My tent, now!” she lashed a pair of tendrils around his belly and began dragging him towards her own tent.
“Y-yes, dear!” he said as he made only a half-hearted show of resisting, letting his toeclaws dig into the ground as if he was being dragged there against his will. Which was anything but the case, but they did enjoy a little roleplay now and again.
And Glassie thought sylveons could be assertive! That was the last thought he had before he disappeared inside the tent.
Sexy even without showing anything directly. Enough detail that I could visualize that scene easily.
Excellent opening chapter! It's the attention to detail that really sells this along with taking pains to establish the characters and their personalities as something more than total horndogs. Not that there's anything wrong with that, of course...
Really looking forward to more! I'll hit the second chapter tonight.
Comment posted by AJ Aficionado deleted Mar 27th, 2022
11265657 That's exactly it. It wasn't supposed to be crossed over with anything. What ended up happening was it ended up being crossed over later on with Warcraft.
Hey, folks. While AJ_Aficionado goes under the knife to (hopefully) finally get a severe acid reflux issue fixed, I promised him something nice to come home when he starts his long recuperation. That something being a series of narrated longposts on existing chapters of Equestria Mystery Dungeon.
It was a tradition he started himself on my stories, when he wasn't writing much. His main creative outlet during that time was doing running commentaries on my released chapters, often using borrowed characters from his stories or the show. He gave me plenyt of meaty and witty comments, so I'm returning the favor here for the second time, and hopefully give him something to enjoy when he finally logs into fimfiction again.
I did a longpost on this once before, but this time, I'm doing it with a twist. So for those who wonder why there are enormous comments here full of color, I'm writing an AJ_Aficionado-style long post with my own peanut gallery, just as he's done on so many of my own stories in the past. But whereas he uses his favorite mares—the flower trio, Linky and Twinkleshine—to comment on my stories, I’ve decided to go with Humane 7 from Equestria Girls—or more correctly, the ascended-into-goddesses versions from my very M-rated Harmonic Resonance story, which I won't link here. If you're interested in it, you can find it on my story page.
Feel free to check it out, but be advised it is very adult. But for those unfamiliar with it, the Humane 7 basically ascend into Daydream form through sex and possess powers over and above their geodes and even the usual alicorn magic. You can tell who’s talking by the color of the text, and their powers are noted in the parentheses.
Sunset Shimmer -> Daydream (mind reading, total control of the four elements) Rainbow Dash -> Hyperdash (can traverse spacetime at superluminal speed and travel through black holes to reach other realities) Applejack -> Fertile Fields (total control of plants, able to grow or alter them at will) Fluttershy -> Fluttershine (able to commune with and control animals, including animal spirits) Rarity -> Crystal Queen (total mastery of crystals and their myriad powers, which she can use to boost her own) Pinkie Pie -> Sugar High (chaos magic!) Sci-Twi -> Midnight Maven; the personality fusion of Twilight and Midnight Sparkle (able to interface with, control, and build/manipulate technology. Can surf the web and control computers with her mind).
I reiterate that this longpost was personally requested by the author, AJ_Aficionado. The choice of characters for use in the longpost is mine, however. As the story the seven girls was ascended in very M-rated, you'll see references to it and some of their new *proclivities* here. Needless to say, they're a lot more open about sex than they were as humans and don't have many hangups remaining.
Hyperdash: ... And, here we are! Sorry about the turbulence passing through the Galaxy’s central black hole, there. Even my spacetime powers have trouble compensating for it, sometimes.
Fertile Fields: Tell me about it. That ride was rougher than the driving my brother's truck through the farm backroads when the suspension's out!
Sugar High: Are you kidding? That was Awesome! An even better ride than the best roller coasters at the Elements of Amusement Theme Park!
Midnight Maven: Ugh... speak for yourself, Sugar High. That ergosphere passage was awful this time. Did you have to take us through Sagittarius A right after it ate a star, Hyperdash? Especially after we'd just eaten lunch!
Hyperdash: Complaints, complaints. What are you griping about, M&M? You got to see a full-strength accretion disk like you always wanted and got a massive power-up from all the electromagnetic radiation!
Midnight Maven: True. The gamma ray emissions were incredible and they charged me up like you wouldn't believe. Right now I'm packing so much power I could probably take control of every electronic device on earth!
Fertile Fields: ... It's times like this I'm really glad you ain't Midnight Sparkle anymore, Sugarcube.
Midnight Maven: Me too. Might also explain why I almost feel like I have indigestion right now... ow...
Crystal Queen: Either that, or the plate of jalepeno poppers you downed with extra hot sauce, darling.
Daydream: You look none the worse for wear, Crystal Queen. Okay, so where are we? This doesn't look like a human or pony realm.
Hyperdash: It isn't! I promised Fluttershy we'd visit a reality that she'd enjoy next, right? She wanted a world where animals talk? Well, that's where we are!
Fluttershine: Okay. But um... I don't see any animals around. Don't sense any, either. Even the spirits of this place seem... odd. They're a bit surprised to see us, too. And I almost think it's because we're... human?
Crystal Queen: You mean they don't know of humans? That's unusual among the worlds we've visited.
Fluttershine: I'm not sure. I think they recognize us as humans but think we're not supposed to be here. I'm telling them that we're friends, but they're a little skittish. And um, why are you smiling like that, Hyperdash?
Hyperdash: Because there's good reason for that, Flutters! Just wait until you see where we are! So if everyone will grab hold of my wings, there's a certain place I'd like to whisk us...
Crystal Queen: Fine, but please try to go easy on the loop-de-loops this time, darling? It makes my breasts bounce hard.
Daydream: I don't see the problem, myself...
The pleasant white noise of rushing water greeted the umbreon’s ears as his eyes stirred open.
The cavernous room was nearly pitch black, save for the soft, golden luminescence of the many rings covering his mostly black, furry body. He looked around at the three other beds, made of rough straw similar to his, noting their emptiness.
Midnight Maven: Wait... that's a black dog with red eyes and glowing yellow rings? He's...
Sugar High: An Umbreon! Oh wow! Not just a pokemon, but an eevee! Are we really in a reality where they're real?
Hyperdash: Sure are! What do you think, Fluttershine?
Fluttershine: A pokemon? But I hate that game and all the shows! They capture those poor things and use them for sport! I don't want to see an entire world full of that!
Fertile Fields: Yeah, reckon I'm with Flutters on this one, gang. Don't seem right to me that humans capture creatures that can fry them with a glance.
Hyperdash: But 'they' don't exist here, Fluttershine! Humans, I mean! These guys live free and clear! And they're real!
Fluttershine: Really? Oh, my! That changes everything. And he's so handsome...
“That’s some uncharacteristic initiative from my team,” he muttered sleepily as his muzzle gaped open into a yawn. He hopped out of his nest-like bed of straw, shaking himself off in a doglike fashion, and began gathering seeds and berries from barrels lining the cool walls of his cave home, mixing them together in a bowl which he then filled with water from another barrel.
Fluttershine: And he talks!
Hyperdash: Yep! Just like you wanted!
Daydream: Well, guess that's better than just hearing them say their own name over and over...
He sat and munched on his meal, tail swishing behind him contentedly as he read the note left for him at the table.
Ebon, Sorry for leaving you in the dark (literally). Me and the gals are in Treasure Town shopping and scouting out missions for the day. We brought the Explorer’s Bag with us in case you’re wondering where it ran off to.
Sugar High: Treasure Town? Explorers bag? This is the right out of the games! I love it!
Midnight Maven: I just checked my cached websites for information on all the various games, and you're right. It's uncanny. I haven't played those games, but Spike does. It does raise some interesting questions, though. I mean, do the things our imaginations come up with reflect alternate realities, or are those realities somehow created by our own imagination via quantum effects that automatically generate a new reality? You know, maybe that should be the subject of my next science seminar.
Sugar High: Aw, how boring! Hey, why don't you invite us on instead? We'd liven it up!
Daydream: Sure. I can just see it now—the seven of us having divine roundtable discussions about everything from our favorite burgers to alternate realities we've explored and even demigoddess sex. It would be the ultimate podcast.
Sugar High: I love it! Oh! OH! I know! We'll put it on BoobTube and call it the 'Godcast!'
Hyperdash: She was joking, Sugar High! Though come to think of it, that's actually a perfect name...
“That’s some uncharacteristic initiative from my team,” he muttered sleepily as his muzzle gaped open into a yawn. He hopped out of his nest-like bed of straw, shaking himself off in a doglike fashion, and began gathering seeds and berries from barrels lining the cool walls of his cave home, mixing them together in a bowl which he then filled with water from another barrel.
Daydream: Wow. They even eat the foods of the games.
Hyperdash: Wait—you've played them?
Daydream: No, but I've watched the two Spikes play through them often enough.
Midnight Maven: I'd rather have them playing that than Mortal Street Combat Fighter! Come to think of it, Princess Twilight is starting to get concerned that her Spike is getting addicted to human video games, too...
Regardless, I look forward to exploring with you, as usual, handsome.
- Edelweiss
“That’s my Edelweiss, my leafeon psychiatrist, quartermaster and second-guesser.” Ebon the umbreon muttered before continuing to eat breakfast. He’d have a chat with her later about what the team was saying in his absence about getting burned out. Did they share Edelweiss’s sentiments? Was he the only one who still enjoyed their work?
Sugar High: Oh! Did you read that letter? So he knows a Glaceon, an Espeon, and a Leafeon! It's an all-Eevee team!
Fluttershine: Oh, I hope I get to see them all. Will I, though? It sounds like they're thinking about breaking up.
Hyperdash: You better believe it! Wouldn't have brought you here otherwise! And they won't be idle for long—you won't believe what they're going to be called upon to do!
Ebon thought about his team, imagining them together at the old guild hangout chatting with its wigglytuff guildmaster and the rest of his former colleagues. Sike was a recent acquisition to the team — a peaceful civilian hiding away from the world who had the misfortune of being robbed by a gang that holed up in a nasty place called Shimmer Hill with a bunch of other criminal scum. After she’d seen them capture the leader and recover most of the stolen goods, Sike asked to join Team Allure.
Fluttershine: Oh, dear. That poor girl.
Daydream: Sike's an Espeon right? From what I remember of watching the Spikes play one of the mystery dungeon games, they're psychic-types and can really mess with your head if they want. Guess she was too scared or untrained to fight back.
Crystal Queen: I'll take your word for it, darling. All I noticed was that they were just cute pink cats with a simply stunning gem on their foreheads. I should think about giving Opalescence one!
Fertile Fields: Figures that you'd notice *that*, filly...
Her reasons seemed sound enough. She’d said she wanted to learn how to fight so she could stand up for herself as well as pay the team back for their kindness, given she had no reward to offer them upfront. Even if she was inexperienced, it was an offer he was only too willing to accept. Espeons were typically valuable assets to an exploration team for their ability to read minds and send telepathic messages if they were properly trained. When things went wrong and seconds counted, instant communication was priceless.
Daydream: Yep, psychic types. I think every adventure team should have one regardless of franchise.
Sugar High: Well, then our adventure team is all set, because *you’re* a psychic type, Daydream!
Fertile Fields: Uh, so does this mean we’re a franchise?
Midnight Maven: Considering some of the realities we've seen where we're just a children's TV show whose brand is owned by a big corporation, maybe we are!
Hyperdash: Ugh! Those are my *least* favorite places to visit! I'm not a cartoon character! And worse, the fanbases there keep shipping me with everyone under the sun!
But in Sike's case, Ebon just thought she was impossibly cute with her forked tail and amazing flanks and simply looking at her was reward enough. If she weren’t so shy and he wasn’t her boss, he might forgo taking Sike to mystery dungeons and just train her in bed.
Crystal Queen: How ungentlemanly! He should at least wine and dine her first!
Fertile Fields: That so, Miss I-Fulfill-Student-Sexual-Fantasies-In-Their-Sleep-For-Compliments?
Crystal Queen: Flattery is foreplay, darling!
Glassie the glaceon had come from humble beginnings, serving as an artificial snow maker for a ski-resort in Sinnoh — a fate that she’d confided had been such torment for her, she had recurring nightmares of somehow ending up being forced to do it again if for some reason she couldn’t go exploring anymore.
Unable to endure the indignity of putting her magical abilities to such mundane use as making snow for other pokémon to slide around on, she’d struck out on her own, fighting in arena combat. She’d done that until her body could no longer handle the constant abuse, ultimately deciding that joining an exploration team would be a good way to ‘settle down’.
Hyperdash: I like her already! I wouldn't want to be nothing more than a weather maker, either! Pit fighting like me and double-F do as civies is far more fun!
Fertile Fields: Little unfair for us to be doing that now, though...
Hyperdash: They don't have to know that! We still gotta keep up our civilian image, after all!
She also had an unstoppable libido if the rumors were true, which made a lot of pokémon happy. Everybody except him, who had a prime glaceon rump right in front of him and couldn’t take it as her leader and boss.
“The sacrifices I make…” Ebon grumbled, before taking another bite of his meal and washing it down with a small vial of elixir.
Daydream: There you go. A true professional.
Sugar High: Oh! We should totally grab one of those elixirs! Even a whole barrel of it! I could add them to my Sugar Cube Corner confections and use them to start a whole new line of energy drinks!
Midnight Maven: Call me crazy, but something tells that adding magical cocktails from other dimensions to human drinks *might* have some potentially severe side effects...
Sugar High: Spoilsport! What's the worst that could happen?
Fertile Fields: Uh, maybe they cause people to turn into pokemon or gain Eevee-like powers?
Sugar High: I said the worst, not the best!
Edelweiss the leafeon was Ebon’s first partner, both in the explorer and sexual sense. She was also his sister, but he carefully kept that information to himself. They’d departed from a place called Eevee Village, which was home to the namesake pokémon and all of its variants, in search of treasure and fame. The village also had a completely justified reputation for being tolerant of inbreeding and incestuous pairings. It was unquestionably a paradise for those such as he, and Ebon found himself regretting leaving it at times, given how different the outsiders and their culture were.
If these outsider pokémon knew Ebon had been ‘slipping his sister the bone’ and ‘tying her in knots’ from time to time, he could expect to find his own face on a wanted poster.
Both he and Edelweiss knew they’d never be a ‘proper’ married couple, but he still looked forward to quality time with his sis when the two of them were alone and had nothing else going on.
Fertile Fields: Well, now! Looks like our boy Ebon Umbreon drills his own sister! Might be a bit taboo even here, but that makes him an Eevee after my own goddess heart!
Midnight Maven: Given we've all been with siblings and sometimes parents by now, I think that pretty much goes for all of us! Except Fluttershine, that is.
Fluttershine: Um, no. I'm not going to be with my brother, thanks. I'm glad all of you have fun with your families, but mine...?
Crystal Queen: For as immature, irresponsible and obnoxious as Zephyr is, I don't think anyone here blames you, darling.
Next on Ebon’s to-do list was the overflowing trash can next to the ice stone-powered freezer he put Edelweiss’s letter into. No use leaving evidence of their less-than-platonic relationship for the others.
Glassie had apparently finished off the last of her Hoggin’ Pawz half-gallon carton of ice cream and left it snarkily turned upside down on top of the already-compacted garbage of used grimy food, used technical machines — single-use ability kits to train new abilities — milk jars and junk food wrappers.
Sugar High: I want Hoggin' Pawz! I WANT HOGGIN' PAWZ! We could make a mint selling Eevee ice cream at Sugar Cube Corner!
Daydream: Okay, I admit it might be interesting to try. But Oran Berry flavor like that carton says...?
“Arceus, darn it, Glassie!” Ebon growled through his teeth as he dragged the overfilled bag, still partially wedged inside the can, and dragged it outside through the door and placed it inside the can for the scavenging nicket pokémon to steal. He knew he would have to yell at her later for such a flagrant disregard for the rules and that after looking into her beautiful blue eyes, he’d lose his nerve quickly. Maybe she’d consent to being relentlessly bred as a form of punishment instead. It was no more than she deserved.
Daydream: Uh... who's Arceus and why is Ebon taking his name in vain?
Midnight Maven: As the name's usage suggests, he's basically the Pokemon creator. Their God—or at least, that's what some of the games imply from G4 onward.
Crystal Queen: I would be upset at him for swearing and for threatening her with sex, except for how flattering he is to her! So what does this Glassie look like? She almost sounds like a lady after my own crystal-loving heart!
Hyperdash: You'll know soon enough, filly!
“I really need to get laid. I really, really, really need to get laid.” Ebon whimpered to himself, taking a leak into an open pit dug for just such a purpose outside his cave. He was even now still erect having shaken himself off, images of his teammates in compromising positions flashing in rapid succession through his mind.
Sugar High: Aw... poor Ebon! All these cute Eevees around and he's not allowed any of them!
Fluttershine: The poor dear. He could always have me.
Fertile Fields: Really, filly?
Fluttershine: Really. I've been with plenty of animals by now, and Eevees are intelligent. He looks like a fox and is even equipped like one.
Daydream: Nicely endowed, too. Snout's a bit short, but otherwise? Yeah, he could be an exotic fox. I'd do him as a mare or woman.
By the time he was done cold-showering himself off in the waterfall —and gaining some welcome limpness in the process — the sun had finally come up, shining through the many open windows. Looking out from the one in the kitchen, he could make out his eevee-shaped mailbox near the dirt road leading into town; one of its ears was pointing up, indicating a new delivery.
Fluttershine: Oh! Look at the mailbox. I want an animal-shaped one for my house. Maybe I'll make one later.
Hyperdash: Oh, yeah? Of what animal?
Fluttershine: Angel Bunny, of course!
Everybody: Of course...
“Weird. The post doesn’t even run today.” A strange excitement gripped him as he pondered the implications. “Could it be… Wonder Mail? No way…” He finished eating and washed his dish before putting it back in the cupboard.
House rules stated that everyone washes their dishes immediately after using one and as leader of Team Allure, he had to live by example.
Fertile Fields: Well, at least he tries to be a good boss. That's more than I can say for mine at the Smoothie Shop! Sometimes I'm surprised I haven't used the wood of his desk and door frame to seal him in his own office yet...
After quickly tying his old Wigglytuff’s Guild scarf around his neck and tucking his map into his fluffy chest fur, he raced outside through the door.
Crystal Queen: My, such a darling little fashion accessory! It accents the red of eyes so well!
Fertile Fields: Trust you to notice that instead of his thick red cock, Crystal Queen.
Crystal Queen: Hmph! Appearances matter to me. And as far as otherworldly creatures go, my body is only available to dragons! I will never understand why my pony counterpart is so averse to them!
“And now, the moment of truth!” Having reached the mailbox, he opened it to find a sealed envelope without any sort of address or identifying information on it whatsoever. His earlier excitement grew as he beheld the runed seal holding the letter closed. He didn’t dare try to force open a magically-sealed item in a world that contained creatures that would blow their messages (or even themselves!) up rather than face capture, and so he looked for alternate means of entry.
It was at that moment he noticed the seal perfectly matched the rune on his scarf.
Smiling, he then knew exactly what to do, pressing his scarf rune into the seal. Glowing bright for a moment before it faded into nothingness, it released its magical hold on the paper, leaving Ebon able to open the letter easily with one quick swipe from a single claw.
“This is incredible! I thought the secret rank thing was a joke!” He gave a whooping cheer and he leapt into the air on all fours.
Fertile Fields: Reckon he makes it sound ilke a secret decoder ring out of an old box of Cracker Jacks...
His team had once rescued a scizor from a lovestruck froslass, and it’d granted him and his team the ‘secret rank’ which would allow for missions to be sent for his eyes only. Other explorers he’d spoken to had never heard of such a thing. To his great annoyance, they treated him like a ‘special needs’ umbreon whenever the subject of the strange rune pinned to his scarf came up. Over time, he’d trained himself to never even think about it at long last, after years of nothing, was this very secretive-looking letter being held in his paws.
His eyes scanned over the letter. It was an invitation to explore a mystery dungeon he’d never heard of called ‘Ponyta Passage’ — named after a horse-like pokémon native to the Kanto and Galar regions. Comparing his own map with the one sent, he was not surprised to learn that his map had no knowledge of the location. That soon changed as it absorbed the new information; Ebon watched with the eagerness of a young eevee cub as his map updated itself magically with the new coordinates.
Daydream: Okay, I know that the game map automatically updating is a thing, but Ponyta Passage? I don't remember seeing that when the two Spikes were playing. Is that a real place in the games?
Midnight Maven: Actually, no. At least, not to my knowledge, which includes all the information available on the internet.
Fertile Fields: I'd say that's pretty authoritative, Sugarcube.
And then he yelped in surprise when the letter burst into flames atop the mailbox where he’d set it, singing the base of one of the mailbox’s flag-ears before Ebon could bat it away.
“Jeez. Well, I guess that’s one way to keep it a secret. Just wait until the team hears about this!” He set off towards Treasure Town at a full sprint. The ladies could wait on whatever missions they discovered. They were off for a real adventure.
Ebon didn’t stop running until he reached town. As promised, Edelweiss was there with the bag. The other two were nowhere to be seen.
“The bag's a little heavier than when I picked it up at the hideout. Kek the Kecleon’s Shop had a great deal on reviver seeds today so I bought them all!” The corners of Edelweiss’s toffee-colored eyes crinkled up. “Hopefully, they’ll make us all a bit smarter.”
“I was kind of hoping for something to make me a bit less horny.” Ebon kissed her freckled cheek and licked the single strand of grass gracing her forehead before tracing his tongue wetly up the length of one of her long, leaflike ears as his sister cooed with delight. “But lacking it, I guess I’ll just have to relieve my urges on you,” he cooed.
Crystal Queen: My! He is direct, isn't he? I must say, I rather like that. He comes across as confident without crossing over into corny bravado.
Fertile Fields: Me too, C-Q! I like guys who use the honest approach instead of playing games.
Hyperdash: Oh, yeah? And has Big Macintosh ever said he'll just have to 'relieve his urges on you?'
Fertile Fields: Seriously, girlfriend? Big Mac's a man of action, not words! When he wants sex, he just says "wanna screw, sis?"
Hyperdash: Ha! Sounds about right. Does he say that to you or to Apple Bloom?
Fertile Fields: Yes!
She gave a pleasured sound of her own. “What happened to your principles, brother? You’re in authority over me! How dare you take advantage of me in front of the townsfolk?” Edelweiss teased as she leaned her ear into the contact.
“Not if they don’t look our way!” Ebon whispered to her before slipping his slurping tongue into her inner ear in an act of intimacy he knew she loved as much as him — her ears were just too big and tempting not to touch and explore!
“Ebon! You should at least drag me into the bush first before you have your way with me!” she only half-protested. The umbreon considered his sister’s words, unsheathing his canine member which slowly filled until it extended nearly half the length of his body before silently cursing his luck and backing away as Glassie strutted up to the two of them like the mayor of Treasure Town. Sike was with her, a few feet back and with her tail hovering low to the ground as if she were under threat.
Sugar High: Aw... I really wanted to see them screw! But yay! An actual Glaceon and Espeon! Just like you wanted, Fluttershine!
Fluttershine: I really did. And I like them a lot. Just like Ebon, they look so small but also so strong and sensual.
Instinctively, he put his sister between himself and the rest of the team to block his erection from view. “Hey, Glassie.” Ebon couldn’t quite hide the disappointment from his voice. “What’s with Sike, is she okay?”
“No, I’m not okay!” Sike sat down huffily, slashing her tail angrily behind her. “Glassie tried talking some bidoof into asking me out and he did!”
Ebon knew this particular bidoof, a rodent-like pokémon with large buck teeth. A nice guy if rather unsophisticated in his mannerisms.
Crystal Queen: Oh, dear. That sounds just like Hayseed Turnip Truck. An eager and earnest young colt, if a little... unaware of himself. Nice enough, and his heart is in the right place, but not a creature I would encourage to date a shy young thing like Sike there.
Daydream: Well, his parents finally put him in braces, at least.
Fertile Fields: Now don't be talking smack about him! I admit he ain't the sharpest tool in the shed, but he's still my kin and is turning out to be a pretty good handyman. As for his overbite, the whole clan pitched in to pay for fixing it. We Apples always take care of our own!
Midnight Maven: You could just use your magic to fix his jaw, couldn't you?
Fertile Fields: I could, but I was in braces for three years, so I ain't gonna spare him the experience!
“Glassie!” Edelweiss growled, pawing at the dirt road.
“Um… you’re welcome!” Glassie shouted back at Sike, indignantly.
“Glassie, I know you mean well, but you need to consult with your teammate before trying to pass her off like an unwanted hold item you pulled out of a nicket’s hoard,” Ebon said sarcastically. “I mean, do you even know if she likes guys?”
Everyone: Ebon!
Glassie looked back at Ebon looking as if she were holding back laughter. Sike’s face turned deep red and Edelweiss did an about-face, looking up at him with exasperated anger. “Ebon!”
Crystal Queen: Bad show, darling. There are certain questions you do not ask in polite company!
Hyperdash: You're right. Even I know never ask a lady their age, weight, or whether they're into eating muff!
Ebon felt his face become hot and tugged at his scarf, nervously. “Not… that it’s any of my business. I’m sorry, Sike.”
Arceus, I am a stupid idiot. Ebon thought to himself. He didn’t know what he hated himself for more at that moment — that he was an unwitting participant in Glassie’s bullying or that he still hoped deep down he’d have a chance to rut the beautiful espeon senseless someday, especially given the fact she was genuinely curious about her sexuality.
He blinked and shook his head at the thought. Check that — a stupid, horny idiot who still needs to get laid, badly.
Fertile Fields: Well, guess I can forgive him, then. I swear, Big Mac gets not right in the head either if he goes without sex for so much as a day.
Midnight Maven: It's the same with Shining Armor. If I don't relieve him every so often, he takes it out in other ways.
Daydream: Uh... what other ways?
Midnight Maven: Let's just say that when he gets horny enough, he isn't that picky which of my parents is around.
“Apology accepted, Ebon.” Sike looked awkwardly at the road beneath her, running her paw daintily over its dusty surface. “I’m just not comfortable talking about scary stuff like sex yet… or seeing any other pokémon.”
“And there’s no rush, sweetie.” Edelweiss coiled a vine around Sike’s back and stroked her silky soft fur. Sike responded with throaty purrs that filled the umbreon with contentment.
Fertile Fields: Edelweiss is a 'Leafeon', right? I not only like her appearance but her personality. Also helps that her powers aren't that different than mine!
Crystal Queen: She's not bad, but my heart goes out to Sike. Such a pretty kitty with that gem in her forehead! Why can't the other Eevees treat her well?
“Yeah, I’m sorry… I guess.” Glassie grated practically through her teeth. “But speaking of scoring some action, where are we going today, boss? Hopefully somewhere with a lot of grass and ground types for those sweet, sweet type-advantage criticals. I wanna wreck some faces!”
Hyperdash: You go, girlfriend! I really like Glassie! Good look and cool powers—quite literally!
Daydream: Well if nobody's taking Ebon's side here, I will. I'm already getting the impression he has his hands full with this crew.
Fluttershine: Me, too. I can tell he means well, even if he's sometimes a bit clumsy about it. Hayseed Turnip Truck is the same way.
Glassie did a backflip on the spot, landing squarely on all four paws; bent forward low to the ground with her ribbon-like tail quivering behind her like skorupi’s sting as she bore her teeth in a display of predatory pride.
Despite her aggressive stance, the intimidation factor was completely undone for Ebon who immediately imagined himself mounting the eeveelution from behind. He vividly imagined filling her icy love tunnel with a sticky avalanche of hot umbreon seed while she begged for more, not content to stop until there was a brand new eevee growing in her belly…
Hyperdash: Damn, dude! He's a typical guy, then. He's got a one-track mind and thinks with his second head more than his first.
Daydream: He's young, he's virile, and he's surrounded by three beautiful girls. I'd be more worried if he wasn't this way!
Hyperdash: Maybe, but fine—judgement reserved until I see him in action. I really want to see these four fight!
Stopping there to keep this at least somewhat bite-sized. Hope you enjoy, AJA! More is definitely coming, though they may take me a while to get through given the length of this thing! Hope your surgery went well and recovery goes smoothly!
Beginning part 2 of the chapter longpost comment promised to AJA for his post-surgery recovery period. See the previous one if you want a rundown on just who these characters are and what this is all about.
“Ebon! Hellooo! Ebon!” Glassie scowled up at him. “Dude, what the heck is wrong with you this morning? You’re all spaced out!”
Ebon imagined an entire brood of Glassie’s brown-and-tan striped eggs surrounding them in a candle-lit circle, each resting in their own nest of straw. The glaceon begging for just one more eevee as his erection sank deep inside her again and again — the whole room soon overflowing with eggs. He knew he’d have to stop eventually but his hardness never faltered as he seed instantly replenished with each climax.
Fertile Fields: Uh, yeah. Reckon, this boy's got it bad. So he not only wants to screw them, he wants to knock them all up!
Crystal Queen: The breeding instinct of boys is not to be denied, darling. And despite what some say, it is not a bad thing.
Fluttershine: Um, I really won't complain if he wants to make more adorable eevees.
Midnight Maven: Odd that they lay eggs when they otherwise have mammalian anatomy. What are they, platypuses?
Sugar High: Nope! Pokemon, silly!
Midnight Maven:
Hyperdash: BWAAHAHAHAHA!
Daydream: I think you walked right into that one, filly...
“EBON!”
“Huh?” Realizing he was daydreaming again, Ebon shook his head and silently cursed himself again. “Uh, sorry. I didn’t sleep all that well.” He wished he hadn’t been too tired the last few nights to masturbate before bed, given how pent-up he felt now. Living in the same room with three other pokémon was a major drawback in more ways than one, given it didn’t always allow the privacy he needed to take care of his more personal needs.
“But enough of that. Actually, I have some fantastic news to deliver to you all. Give me your maps. I need to update them.”
“Update them? What do you mean, Ebon?” Edelweiss asked, before she pawed over the map she’d stowed in her leafy green chest fluff.
The other two did likewise and Ebon, not answering Edelweiss, instead collected their maps and stacked his on top. The stack illuminated briefly as each map updated to match his.
Midnight Maven: Wow. Like synching smartphones. I wonder if I could use my technomagic powers to interface with those things?
Daydream: Well, it's using an odd magic instead of tech, but I don't see why not. You were already able to interface with the Friendship Map in Equestria, after all!
“Wha- How did you do that without taking a mission from the guild?” Edelweiss asked, the other two party members adding their own confused expressions.
“That Wonder Mail system actually works! I got a mission to go to someplace called ‘Ponyta Passage’. Completely unexplored territory!” Ebon pawed the updated maps back to his team.
Sugar High: Aw! He's never explored the passage of a Ponyta before? No wonder he's so hard up!
Fertile Fields: Trust you to make that joke, Sugarcube...
Sugar High: What joke?
“‘Ponyta Passage’?” Sike replied slowly, repeating back the words as if they were spoken in some foreign language. “It’s filled with ponyta, I presume?”
“Just my luck they’d have a type-advantage over me. Not that it’ll save them from my blizzard!” A breeze wicked past them, sending a plume of powdery snow from off of Glassie’s back and into the air.
“I don’t know what lives there, Sike. The message didn’t say and it sorta… caught fire and burned up after my map updated,” Ebon replied delicately. “I guess I screwed up. I didn’t really read the message closely. I saw the name of the dungeon and the map and was too excited to catch the rest. I just couldn’t believe the Wonder Mail actually worked!”
“Completely understandable, bruh… I mean boss,” Edelweiss quickly added as Ebon cringed slightly. “What matters is we have someplace new and interesting to go to for a change!”
Hyperdash: She ain't wrong, Umbrie. That's a bruh moment if I've ever heard one.
Daydream: You said it. Ebon seems good at committing them. I count two so far. Does Big Mac ever have any Bruh moments, Double-F?
Fertile Fields: Him? Nah. Reckon it's kinda hard to have one when you don't talk much and ain't that interested in impressing people.
Midnight Maven: Shining Armor, on the other hand...
“Yeah!” Glassie made another backflip, giving Ebon a brief but tantalizing view of her backside before striking her trademark pose.
“Yeah…” Sike’s ears drooped.
“Aw, don’t worry Sike. I’ll keep you safe. Whatever they are, they won’t come anywhere near you.” Glassie breathed ice onto a nearby rock, freezing it solid instantly. “And if they target the whole room… well… at least you know how to dig a hole to avoid it.”
Sugar High: Aw... Sike's a scaredy cat!
Midnight Maven: She reminds me of myself before ascension—at least the Twilight half of me. Very smart but shy and not knowing how to deal with bullies. Guess at this point she's not a lover, or a fighter.
Crystal Queen: Such an elegant and graceful creature should not have to be a fighter! She should simply be turning the heads of every Eevee she meets!
Hyperdash: That isn't really how Pokemon society works, C-Q. Hey, at least she's got a big sister who'll stand up for her!
Daydream: I think Ebon will too, though I'm a bit concerned about his libido overriding his good sense with her.
“Glassie’s right, Sike. We’ll treat this like the final dungeon we’ll ever have to run and bring plenty of reviver seeds.” Ebon said, nodding. “Unfortunately, Glassie, I don’t think we’ll be able to let you just blizzard bomb the entire site.”
“Aww, why not, Ebon?”
“It’s a strong strategy but its strength is brittle. There are too many things that can go wrong in a dungeon you don’t know with strategies that rely on a single trick. Sure you can control the weather but other pokémon can too,” Ebon explained.
“Point taken, Boss.” Glassie chuckled. “You know, others say I think too much like I’m fighting in the arena. They might have a point, huh?”
Fertile Fields: That IS a good point! Even before we ascended, Rainbow and I tended to mop the floor with fighters who thought they were hot stuff because they were good in high school wrestling ring or their local karate dojo. A real pit fight's a totally different beast!
Hyperdash: Yep. Gilda, too. Their problem without fail was that they relied on one skill or form and couldn't deal with a freewheeling fight. Gilds especially likes battling bruisers, because they thought more muscle made them invincible. She loves putting them down hard.
Crystal Queen: I still can't believe you three engage in such barbarity, especially after ascending! Aren't back-alley pit fights just a *tad* beneath you, now?
Fertile Fields: Oh, get off yer high horse, filly. We don't injure anything but their egos. And besides, you could say that going to school or any other aspect of our teenage lives are beneath us all now. But me? I don't wanna be a goddess all the time! Sometimes I really do prefer just being Applejack, Senior student at CHS!
Daydream: I agree. And I’d also say that you can't condemn H-D and Double-F without condemning these Eevees, too, since they pretty much fight for a living! Both in the games and in real life, it seems...
Fluttershine: Oh. I really wish they wouldn’t. Fighting is so wrong.
Daydream: It isn’t always, you know. Just like with the griffons back in my Equestria, fighting is a big part of their lives. You can’t take that away from them without taking away a big part of who and what they are.
Hyperdash: Same with me and Gilda! And besides, Flutters, weren’t two of your favorite verses to visit the ones where you became a kick-ass commando?
Crystal Queen: You can stop with the smug look, Hyperdash. But oh, my. Look at Fluttershine blush!
“I find the only real item you can truly rely on to save your hide in all situations is the escape orb,” Sike opined. “Retreat is sometimes the best option.”
“I agree you should never forget to bring one escape orb,” Edelweiss nudged her brother with her tail. “Eh, Ebon?”
“Yeah, yeah! I’ll remember it this time, Mom!” Ebon gave a barklike laugh. The other three laughed as well. “So we’re all okay with heading into the unknown for a change?”
“Yeah!” Team Allure chorused back at him.
Sugar High: Hey, we head into the unknown every time we explore a new reality!
Hyperdash: Or crack open a book in class... I can traverse all spacetime, yet still don't know how I'm going to pass my next physics exam.
Midnight Maven: I'll help you. And speak for yourself, guys. I'm rewriting the physics books after all our black hole passages and explorations of the multiverse! And when I present my new grand unification theory of quantum gravity and special relativity to Dean Sombra at Everfree University, I just know I'll get named a full Professor and receive instant tenure!
Daydream: Now a goddess, yet in some ways still the same old Twilight...
Midnight Maven: And proud of it!
Ebon tied the Explorer’s bag to his back and started walking to the bank. “Smiles go for miles. Sort out your abilities with Alec, say goodbye to all your friends and be back here in fifteen minutes. We’ve got a long journey ahead of us.”
His team nodded and split off towards a large, yellow electric-type anthropomorphic pokémon standing behind a counter.
Ebon stood at the bank, thinking as Temujina the motherly kangaskhan waited patiently for him to sort out his inventory while the rest of the team were at the Electrivire Link Shop modifying their abilities.
Surely valuable treasures awaited in a location no one had picked over already, so he couldn’t just cram his bag with sixty reviver seeds as if he were facing down a guardian or something. As they needed plenty of room to lug their likely loot, they would travel light — no greater than twenty-five items. He also couldn’t waste time trying to cover all of his bases with helpful seeds and orbs when the dungeon itself could be counted on to provide them plenty of oran berries for healing. So he deposited all of his berries except three and withdrew ten reviver seeds in their place.
There was also the imperative need for food once they got there. How many floors did this location have? How many rooms were on each floor? He assumed the worst and grabbed five huge apples.
Fertile Fields: Whoa! Check out them apples! I'm actually jealous now. How'd they grow those? They're each as big as a melon!
Midnight Maven: I'm just trying to figure out how they're storing them. Is there a pocket dimension in their 'explorer bags'?
Daydream: Well, back in Equestria, we had something called storage gems that could magically hold a lot of loot. They were expensive, though, and exhausted their magic after only a couple uses.
Sugar High: Eh. Why bother? The entire multiverse is my storage gem!<reaches behind bush to pull out a plate of cupcakes and pass them around>
Daydream: Why bother indeed...
There was Sike being isolated from the group to worry about as well. She wasn’t as useless as your typical glory-seeking escort stepping into dungeons well beyond their ability to handle, but until she was more seasoned, she was still the weak link in the chain. If a warp trap isolated her from the group, Ebon would have to corral her quickly. So he withdrew three rollcall orbs next.
Bad luck with traps draining their abilities was always a problem so three max elixirs went into the bag as well to restore their powers.
That left space for a single escape orb if everything went completely to the houndooms. It hadn’t happened yet to his group given how powerful they were and how well they worked together, but there was still a first time for everything.
Fertile Fields: Okay, I now admit Ebon's able to think with his head and not just his cock. I don't know much about mystery dungeon game strategy, but it sure sounds like he knows his stuff.
Daydream: And a lot of what he's doing is centered on protecting Sike. He might be interested in her, but I'll also admit he cares for her.
Fluttershine: He really does. I can tell. In fact, they all seem to care for each other. They form a good team, just like us.
Hyperdash: Huh. Hadn't really thought of it like that, but you're right. Especially in light of what'll happen later...
Midnight Maven: No spoilers, please! I'm actually getting really curious where this is going...
He didn’t bother with held items. Far too situational and one sticky trap away from being utterly useless dead weight.
“Perfect! Now that that’s settled, Temujina, I want to deposit all of this again.” Ebon plopped the bag back on the counter. “I’ll take all this stuff out later once I’m on the road from one of your statues. For now, just give me 10 oran berries and apples for me and my team to eat.”
“But you’ve been sorting this out for the last ten minutes! Isn't this all a bit anticlimatic?” she asked.
“Sorry, lovely. I’m not much of an abstract thinker. I’ve got to have the stuff right in front of me to think properly,” Ebon replied, scratching his head.
Fertile Fields: He's reminding me a lot of Big Mac again. Big Bro ain't much for abstract thought, but put something like a broken tractor in front of him, and he figures out what's wrong and how to fix it straightaway.
Sugar High: That makes sense! I heard he the one thing he excelled at in school was shop class!
Fertile Fields: It's true. He didn't do that well in math, chemistry, or English. But dang if he ain't real good with tools, motors and engines. To say nothing of that new horsecock of his!
Crystal Queen: Gah! TMI!
Sugar High: OoooOooOoOooo... Tell me more!
“Hmph! Boys…” Temujina waved him off.
Hyperdash: You said it, sister! Can't live with them...
Sugar High: Can't have sex without them! Okay, we can, but it's not quite as fun...
Hyperdash: On behalf of me and Gilda, speak for yourself!
Glassie turned to look at Ebon, clearly upset that she’d had to swap out ‘hail’ for ‘water spout’.
“Stupid, water-type move…” Glassie grumbled, walking away from the Electrivire Link shop. “I feel like such a sell-out…”
“You’ll thank me when the whole dungeon turns out to be fire and ground-type. Now let’s move out!” Ebon exclaimed, circling his tail to signal his party for final assembly at the road out of town.
The townsfolk cheered them on, wishing them the best of luck. Temujina even hugged them all around the neck. “Return safely, Team Allure. We await news of your glorious triumph!” She called out to them.
“We’ll bring you back a gold ribbon, Temujina!” Ebon called back before the four waved to their fans and departed. The cheering grew quieter and quieter until soon they were on their own. The umbreon adjusted the strap carrying one of the four tents in addition to the Explorer Bag on his back. They wouldn’t have to worry about food and shelter during the six-month-long journey it’d take to get there, but he knew he and his party were going to be really sore before it was all over.
Fertile Fields: Six months? We can't stay here that long, Hyperdash!
Sugar High: Yeah! We've got a band competition this weekend and there's a jam session with the metalworking club this Wednesday! We're forging Viking battle axes and I really don't want to miss that!
Hyperdash: I know, I know! Jeez, folks, after all the different verses and eras we've visited, you guys never seem to remember that I can time travel, too!
Midnight Maven: I didn't forget, H-D. But I also didn't forget that the further in time you go and the more of us you take, the more draining it is for you, potentially marooning us there for a bit. By my calculations, traveling six months into the future from my arbitrary point with all six of us in tow would take you on average 5.236 hours to recharge enough to do it again, with the number rising exponentially with greater time distance traveled.
Daydream: And Arceus only knows what would happen if we were trapped away from Earth if some magical megathreat like the Sirens appeared. What? We're in a pokemon world, so I'm going to invoke a Pokemon God.
Fertile Fields: I guess this place is really going to our heads, then. Well, that's fine with me. So let's call it a day for now and head back next week, when we've got some free time and Dashie's at full power again.
Fluttershine: Aw. I really don't want to go, but I guess we have to. I wouldn't want to be away from my animals at the sanctuary for more than a few hours, either.
Crystal Queen: Or my boutique! And I did promise my sister I'd take her and the rest of the Destiny Seeking Teenagers bowling. It's their latest attempt to find a future profession!
Hyperdash: Okay, okay. We'll head back now. It was a good start, anyway. All aboard for the Galactic Central Black Hole Multiversal Express!
Midnight Maven: Ugh... just hope that ergosphere has settled down a bit...
Beginning part 3 of the chapter longpost comment promised to AJA for his post-surgery recovery period. See Part 1 if you want a rundown on just who these characters are and what this is all about:
Fertile Fields: Whew! And here we are again. Nice to see the passage through that 'ringularity' or whatever was a little less bumpy this time, too!
Hyperdash: You're welcome! I made sure to take it slow and easy this time for you wimps. Didn't want to upset Middie's sensitive stomach again!
Midnight Maven: Do you want me to post your reaction to meeting our world's Volare from right after we ascended to your channel on BoobTube, H-D? Because I swear I will!
Daydream: Ha! That was classic. You were so surprised you spilled a platter of drinks all over him!
Hyperdash: Okay, okay! Jeez, a goddess can't even make a joke anymore...
Sugar High: Aw... but I wanted it to be bumpy again! Seeing us get stretched and distorted like a funhouse mirror was AWESOME!
Midnight Maven: So nice to know you enjoy gravitational spaghettification, Sugar High.
Sugar High: Well, DUH! I LOVE spaghetti! Especially with meatballs and extra parmesean!
Midnight Maven: ... Why do I even bother?
Crystal Queen: I don't know, darling, but it can wait. So where's our favorite team of Eevees now?
Fluttershine: Yes, where?
Hyperdash: I checked ahead, and they should be right about... here!
Six and a half months later, their destination came within sight of Team Allure’s caravan. Bad weather and the occasional raid from criminal bands and even feral pokémon — the latter living in caves and holes in the ground — had certainly made things lively and dangerous. Especially as they ventured further out; the settlements they passed grew smaller and smaller until civilized pokémon had disappeared from sight entirely, replaced by bad roads and pristine wilderness. It was like they’d fallen off the map into an entirely new world.
Daydream: Or they're at the edge of the Apple Family Farm. That wilderness on the western edge is like stepping from a cornfiend into the most isolated area of Alaska.
Fertile Fields: Now don't be throwing shade on our land, Daydream! We deliberately didn't develop all of it! Guess we wanted at least one part of it to remain untouched and pristine. And besides, it ain't all wilderness in there. I've got my own little cozy hidey-hole for communing with plants deep in the woods!
Sugar High: Aw... and you've never showed us?
Fertile Fields: Well, it's kinda my private little goddess sanctuary there. And no offense, but think I'd rather keep it that way, too.
Crystal Queen: I sympathize, darling. I feel the same way about my inspiration room, which is now as much about communing with my crystals as fashion design!
Midnight Maven: Or me with my lab.
Sugar High: Or my metalworking shop! I cook up all sorts of chaos down there!
Daydream: When you say 'chaos'...
Sugar High: Sorry, no spoilers!
Fertile Fields: I really don't like it when your hair falls flat and you smile like that, Sugarcube...
Upon arrival at the location marked on their map, they set up base camp in a dark wood, bisected by a river near the shadow of a tall mountain that had no name.
Previous experience had taught Ebon and his team that once you got a glimpse of the kangaskhan statue — a magical access portal to the bank account back in Treasure Town — you’d found the entrance to your mystery dungeon. This particular statue was set in front of a wide-open cave mouth that let up into the mountain; not for the first time he wondered how the statues had been transported out there in the first place.
Midnight Maven: That's what I'm wondering. How do you set up remote magical statues? Do you know of a way, Daydream?
Daydream: Actually, yes—at least on Equestria. There are remote teleport spells unicorns can perform if you're powerful enough. And if you make them ride a ley line—which is in itself a trick—you could conceivably transport them a long way.
Crystal Queen: Oh? You sound like you have some experience with it, darling.
Daydream: Daydream: I do, but, uh... since it involved the some rather sinister machinations of my bad-girl self, I'd rather not say more.
Regardless of the answer, their objective reached, they immediately went to work pitching tents, digging wells, camouflaging the perimeter of their camp, and otherwise building their new home for the foreseeable future.
Fire was normally difficult to generate or manage among the four inappropriate elemental types so they brought a fire stone to manage the task. Refrigeration was covered, thanks to Glassie, who found a small cave near their camp which she was able to freeze over, using her blizzard ability and then seal off with a boulder to keep their provisions cold. In short order, they had a fridge stocked with meat courtesy of the area’s feral pokémon population, obligingly provided by Ebon himself who went off into the wilderness at night to hunt.
Fluttershine: They hunt? I thought they just ate seeds and berries! But it turns out they eat... each other?
Fertile Fields: Well, if you're really gonna have a pokemon only-world, there really ain't another option to get protein, Sugarcube.
Daydream: I wouldn't be so surprised, Fluttershine. I mean, look at them—a fox, a feline, and... well, I don't know what Glassie is, but they're definitely configured as predators. Even Leafeon likes meat.
Midnight Maven: I'm kinda surprised it's Ebon doing the hunting, though. You'd think those glowing rings of his would be a dead giveaway to whatever prey he's stalking at night.
Crystal Queen: Hmmm... does an Umbreon have an Umbreoff mode they can use on the hunt?
Sugar High: Oooo... I like that turn of phrase!
Midnight Maven: Interesting idea, but I can't find any reference to being able to turn off his biolights in my cached web pages. Only a slightly humorous fan picture or two.
Crystal Queen: I was joking, darling. I'd suspect he uses his form's combat abilities to hunt.
Midnight Maven: Good point. Yeah, some of his abilities would certainly be useful.
Ebon, Glassie, and Sike were sitting near a small fire on top of conveniently-placed boulders, pointedly refusing to sit on the rough wooden bench ebon had built atop which their dinner of seasoned wild scorbunny chops and tumblers of water sat on dinner plates. Not that he could blame them given the surface of said bench resembled a jolteon’s backside and would do just as much damage if sat on.
Midnight Maven: Now that I just looked up what a Jolteon was... yeah. Ouch!
Edelweiss showed up unannounced and sat at one of the vacant boulders around the fire.
“No intelligent pokémon around for miles but they definitely once lived here. Or something did…” Edelweiss tossed Ebon a stone, inscribed with runes he could not translate but recognized as an older version of the language he spoke. “Another artifact I found while I was scouting the area. I’m betting it’s connected to our ‘Ponyta Passage’.”
Hyperdash: ... and we have bruh moment number three.
Fertile Fields: For as much as he keeps slipping, I'm starting to think our boy Ebon really wants it all out in the open, consequences be damned.
Crystal Queen: Darling! Language!
"You must be starving. Help yourself to some dinner! We’ve just about got this place whipped up into a proper camp and I was thinking we can start our first excursion into Ponyta Passage tomorrow.”
“Are we going to talk about how often you two get each other’s names wrong?” Sike asked, eying the pair of them with apparent suspicion.
“No, we’re not,” Edelweiss stated plainly, forking over a plateful of scorbunny for herself to eat. “And thanks for the offer. This scorbunny looks delicious!”
Fluttershine: Fluttershine: That poor bunny...
Fertile Fields: They're living off the land, filly. If you'll notice, there ain't exactly much in the way of seeds or fruit trees around.
Midnight Maven: Since there aren't any stores or fruit trees around, they have to hunt, Fluttershine. The predator/prey dynamic is something not even we can ever change.
Fluttershine: Oh, I know, but... I guess seeing a bunny killed and eaten hits a little too close to home for me.
Crystal Queen: Because of Angel Bunny?
Fluttershine: Yes. I don't know what I'd do if something like that happened to him.
Fertile Fields: Given every animal on the planet now knows you, I doubt any of them would dare hurt him, Sugarcube.
Daydream: I'd be more worried of him taking advantage of that fact, myself.
Glassie swallowed her mouthful of food and belched loudly before patting her stomach. “I love expeditions. City living is so soft. Out here, in the middle of nowhere, we have fulfilled our destiny as eevees — to adapt and overcome all obstacles and live as free ‘mons!”
“Hear, hear!” Ebon toasted his frosty friend with a mug of crystal clear river water.
Hyperdash: Just water? Somebody pour this Ebon boi a nice tall brewski!
Fertile Fields: And if they don't know what that is, I oughta stick around just to brew some up and show them!
“Closer than brother and sister, we are. No secrets among family.” Glassie stopped speaking to look into the faces of her teammates. Ebon inwardly froze, shooting his sister a look which she shared back with him. A look that said ‘I don’t like where this is going’.
“What I mean to say, Team Allure, is if there’s something going on between Ebon and Edelweiss, then there will be no protest from me. We should not be ashamed of being desirable to other pokémon just as we shouldn’t be ashamed of who we share our bodies with. That is all I have to say.” Glassie set the knife and fork down on her empty plate and began grooming her paws.
Hyperdash: Whoa. Could she be any less subtle about all this?
Fertile Fields: Ya'll, I think I like Glassie. She's as brutally honest as Sugarcoat without being so cold and uncaring about it. She at least tries to cushion it but doesn't lie to do it.
Crystal Queen: I like her too. She's right, we really shouldn't be.
Hyperdash: Uh, since when have we ever?
Daydream: Never, since ascension. And given how we got together, guess I'm hoping these four do to.
Fluttershine: Me too. They seem almost as close to each other as we are and are genuinely good friends, not just teammates.
A spot of pink appeared on Ebon’s cheek as he caught Glassie’s attention. She was clearly giving him an out but it was obvious to him he had to say something in response. “I… appreciate the sentiment, Glassie but I feel it’s inappropriate for me to ‘share my body’ as you say with any of you. As your leader, it’s my job to ensure you’re all treated equally and seeing any one of you puts my impartiality into question.”
“Quite a progressive way of viewing things, I’d say,” Sike nodded her approval at Ebon.
Daydream: Well, he knows what he's supposed to say, anyway...
Fertile Fields: But it sure as hay ain't what he wants to say!
Glassie grunted and rolled her eyes.
“Oh, what is it now, Glassie?” Sike said irritably. “What is your counterpoint to this? Do you think he should be sleeping with all of us? Maybe we can all be evaluated on how well we can suck his…his…”
Sugar High: Oh! Oh! Let's bring Triton and Chest Candy with us next time! They're connoiseurs of oral and should be able to evaluate the skill of these three properly!
Fertile Fields: I think that might be a mite much to ask Sike right now, Sugarcube.
“His what?” Glassie replied with all the false sweetness of a smiling mawile.
Midnight Maven: Okay, I just checked my database as to what that looks like and... yeah.
“Glassie, I’m warning you!” Edelweiss threatened.
“Sike, I know you don’t like reading other pokémon’s minds because you prefer not to know what they’re thinking so I’m going to spell it out for you: You’re breathtakingly gorgeous and Ebon has noticed.”
Hyperdash: Wow. What a wingman! Or wingwoman... Or Wingglaceon?
Crystal Queen: She's just illuminating the obvious like one of my crystal spotlights, darling. Sike IS beautiful! But she needs to see it for herself.
The room went silent from Glassie’s proclamation before Ebon cut in. “Glassie, this is not cool…”
Sugar High: But she's a Glaceon! Everything's cool with her!
Glassie continued speaking as if she’d heard nothing. “He’s noticed all of us are beautiful, sexual creatures and in his mind, he’s imagined having sex with all three of us. Am I wrong? Tell me, Ebon. Just answer me this one question. Am I wrong?”
Fertile Fields: Whoa. That's really putting him on the spot!
Daydream: Yeah, that might be pushing a bit too hard. Starting to think Glassie wants them all to get together as much as Ebon!
Midnight Maven: Yeah, except she's a lot more open about it. I think I'm with Fertile Fields on this one. I rather like her.
No, you aren't wrong but I’ll never admit to that! Ebon refused to say, maintaining a stony gaze with his subordinate.
An awkward silence filled the room again. Ebon noticed Sike’s ears had perked up and her face began to flush crimson.
Daydream: Have to say, when we last visited, I thought that Ebon was a bit sexually impulsive. But it turns out he's not even close to the worst of the bunch!
Sugar High: Worst? Glassie's the BESTEST! She's SO right and she knows it! I can't wait to see these four become like a pony herd!
Daydream: Uh, herd or just friends with benefits?
Midnight Maven: Well, if Ebon really is planning to knock them all up...?
Fluttershine: Oh, my. I really hope he does. I'd love to see lots of little Eevees running around. I'd even raise a few back home.
Crystal Queen: I don't know about that, darling. Angel might be jealous.
Midnight Maven: And that's to say nothing of the potential effects on having actual pokemon added to Earth's ecosystem!
Daydream: Yeah. Talk about invasive species...
Fertile Fields: Uh, isn't that what we are, here?
“No worries, Ebon. You don't even have to say it,” Glassie said with a look of pure unfiltered smugness.
“I’ve never been told…” Sike spoke in a barely audible whisper.
Crystal Queen: Never been told? <swoons into a summoned couch> Darling, you ARE beautiful! And I hope your friends help you see it!
Hyperdash: Have to say, C-Q, I'm impressed that you summoned your chaise lounge from all the way across the multiverse!
“Told that pokémon find each other attractive?” Glassie asked in apparently genuine concern so far as Ebon could tell.
“I’ve never been told I was very pretty before…” Sike’s content seemed to radiate out from her with the warmth of the fire in the center of their tent.
“I’m pretty sure I have!” Edelweiss replied crossly.
Crystal Queen: And now me as well! I must say, I'm tempted to appear to them right now and set her straight!
Fertile Fields: We can't interfere in other realms, Sugarcube. You know that.
Hyperdash: Yeah. No matter how tempting...
Fertile Fields: Oh, yeah? And when were you tempted?
Hyperdash: Whenever I see a world where me and Gilda are estranged! Far as I'm concerned, we're meant to be together in every world across the multiverse!
“Glassie, what do you think is pretty about me? I have to know!” Sike’s forked tail twitch and spasmed as if dodging Zeraora’s electric wrath.
“Your exquisitely soft lavender fur, your soulful matching eyes, your spectacularly large ears just demanding to be worshiped with tooth and tongue…” Glassie’s hooded eyes, like an arbok, bore into the espeon now. Ebon suspected that having finished her dinner, Sike was going to end up being dessert to a still-hungry glaceon.
And he decided he was okay with that. More than okay. Especially if he got to watch.
Fertile Fields: Well, guess our Ebon's a perfectly normal guy after all!
Crystal Queen: Indeed. But for as brusque as Glassie can be, she can also be quite the charmer!
“But sylveon’s ears are bigger!” Sike slapped both forepaws to the side of her head.
“Sylveon’s ears are longer but not as broad.” Glassie countered, but then her expression changed from aroused to apprehensive. “Also, sylveons are kind of terrifying to me, especially under low-light.”
Daydream: Okay, what's a Sylveon?
Fertile Fields: Another type of Eevee. And to judge by a lot of the artwork and articles I'm seeeing, they're apparently an Umbreon's greatest bane...
Sugar High: Oh! They're the bestest Eevee! They even have tentacles! And better yet, Sylvie gets shipped with Umbrie all the time!
Fertile Fields: Oh, Really? Then this gang definitely needs one!
Midnight Maven: Yeah, but they're usually depicted as Umbreon being captured and taken by her unwillingly. And I don't mean in terms of roleplay.
Fertile Fields: Oh. Well, I don't know 'bout that...
Crystal Queen: Nor I. And nor, does it seem, do they.
“Terrifying?” Ebon and Sike echoed while the latter gave Glassie a highly dubious expression.
She hesitated for a moment, but answered. “I’m not proud of admitting it but yeah. There’s just too much action going on up there, you know? Those fluffy ears are swaying, the tail is wagging, those two eyes popping out at you… and the fangs — those throat tearing fangs are constantly showing because they are almost always smiling for whatever reason!”
As she spoke, Glassie’s voice became higher and higher pitched as if she were genuinely in fear. “And to top it all off, their ribbons are all swaying at once! Like they could just jam every one of them inside of you at any moment and no one will even hear you scream!”
Hyperdash: I don't know, gang. They're almost starting to sound like something out of a horror film.
Daydream: Yeah. Five Nights at Freddys style...
Midnight Maven: They're not *that* bad. In fact, I think they look quite pretty. But their powers and stats are basically anti-Umbreon, if that makes any sense. From what I've read, Umbreon were originally too OP, so they basically came up with Sylveon in later generations to counter him.
Daydream: Interesting.
Hyperdash: Too OP, huh? Just like us!
Glassie’s head whipped around and looked outside at the growing darkness behind them as if half-expecting an assault of amorous sylveons at any moment.
It was everything Ebon could do to keep from laughing, jamming both of his forepaws into his muzzle to suppress it. To think of the team’s most notorious sex fiend being terrified of any sexual engagement was too incredible for words.
Admittedly, the idea of being cornered by a sex-crazed sylveon and taken advantage of did give the weaker-typed umbreon a bit of a thrill which he quickly squelched. That was just a silly obsession and no one else had to know about it.
Crystal Queen: My oh my. I guess life really does imitate art!
Midnight Maven: Or our art imitates multiversal life... once again, the question should be asked: do these worlds reflect our imaginations and are somehow generated by them? Or do our imaginations simply reflect what already exists elsewhere in the infinite multiverse, where all things are not only possible, but real?
Fertile Fields: Well, I ain't no scientist, but seems to me that's a distinction without a difference, Sugarcube...
Midnight Maven: ... true. And even for all my massive processing power, my mind goes into logic lock just thinking about it...
Sike’s ears drooped so low, they nearly touched the ground. “Great, now you’ve given me more things to have nightmares about, Glassie!”
“Look, Sike. My point is that you’re beautiful.” Glassie got up from her seat at the table and sat next to Sike, lifting her lilting ears up and bringing her muzzle to within mere inches of Glassie’s own. “And no sylveon can ever have that over you. You deserve better than to be alone.”
Her cheeks flushed a deeper hue. “You really mean that?” she asked, to which she received a sharp nod and a steady gaze back.
“Wow, Glassie… I never knew…” Sike whispered before their lips made contact.
Fertile Fields: Well, will you look at that. So Glassie gets her first!
Hyperdash: Mostly because I think she was the only one willing to try!
Daydream: Gotta say, that girl really knows her body language.
Crystal Queen: Confidence is contagious, darling. And sexy. She's truly a girl after my own heart!
“Wow…” Ebon whispered, receiving a poke to the ribs from one of Edelweiss’s leafy tendrils in return.
Sugar High: Ha! Eat your heart out, Ebon!
Fluttershine: Oh, my. To see that look on his face. I think he'd much rather eat something else out...
Hyperdash: Flutters!
Fluttershine: Well, it's true. And I bet he could do it as well as Big Mac with that tongue.
Fertile Fields: Say WHAT now? And just when has that boy been doing that?
Fluttershine: Every week when he comes over to help out at my sanctuary. Its his favorite thing to do with me now. He's gotten really good at it, and I really enjoy it. Even some of my animals are jealous of him.
Fertile Fields: Huh... had no idea. Soon as I get back, we're gonna have a long talk!
Daydream: Somehow, I don't think there's going to be much talking involved...
“Sorry,” Ebon mouthed silently back to Edelweiss who shook her head in disbelief. It didn’t stop his eeveehood from evolving beneath him, however, rapidly expanding at the sight of his two female teammates making out for the first time.
And it kept happening. To his surprise and delight, Sike wasn’t recoiling with fear and retreating as she had so many times before from affection, even allowing Glassie’s blue tongue to enter her mouth through the gap formed at the side of Sike’s muzzle.
The popping of spit as the two kissed was soon joined by a low, sensual purr from Sike’s throat.
Crystal Queen: Such a throaty purr! I never knew that sound could be used so sensually!
Hyperdash: Yeah? Planning to add it to your own repertoire?
Crystal Queen: Along with adding a gem to my forehead? I just might!
Ebon felt her sister’s paw clutch his, turning to steal a quick kiss from his sister as their teammates were distracted.
“Later, brother. I think tonight is our best chance!” Edelweiss mouthed silently and winked before the pair turned their attentions back onto Sike and Glassie who by then had broken from their spell.
“Sike… Do you want to continue this before we go to sleep, tonight? Somewhere a bit more private?” Glassie asked, gently running her paws over the espeon’s ample flanks. “I have many more reasoned arguments to share about why you’re beautiful. Want to hear them?”
Crystal Queen: I most certainly do!
Daydream: Like C-Q said before, flattery is foreplay! Even with Eevees, it seems...
“I’d like that, Glassie.” Sike’s tail was reared now, twitching ever so slightly as if of its own accord. Ebon could recognize Sike was using her psychic abilities to the fullest, predicting Glassie’s next move. “Meet you at my tent?”
“I’ll be right there. Just let me hang back for a quick second, okay?” Sike nodded back in response to Glassie’s question and bowed low at Ebon and Edelweiss before running back to her tent.
“That was… a most unusual turn of events, I must say,” Edelweiss said in surprise understatement as Ebon could only stare. “But not entirely unwelcome!”
“I take it that you’re thanking me, then,” Glassie replied, frowning back at her.
Edelweiss sighed. “Yes, I suppose I am. Just be gentle with her, okay? This is progress for her, but it can all be ruined in an instant if you push her too far.”
Fertile Fields: My thoughts exactly. You'd best tread very carefully, Glassie. A bad first time with anyone can set you back a long way.
Crystal Queen: It sounds like you're speaking from experience, darling.
Fertile Fields: ... I am, and we'll leave it at that.
Ebon nodded his agreement, finally finding his voice again. “You’re also going to tell her that this… encounter of yours is a one-time thing so she doesn’t expect wedding bells to come out of all of this.”
Daydream: I'm calling it now, girls: Fat chance, even without our intervention.
Fertile Fields: You said it, Sugarcube. So I'm calling it now, too: All four of these colts and fillies'll form a herd before this 'mission' of theirs is done.
Sugar High: YAY! And I can't wait to watch it happen!
Hyperdash: Yeah, yeah. Look, sex is fun, but I'd really like to see some fighting, too. Thankfully, having looked ahead, I already know some is coming!
Midnight Maven: No spoilers, please!
Fluttershine: Oh, dear. Just so long as they're not fighting with each other...
Glassie winced. “Yeah, I know how this looks. Just have a little faith in me, okay? You two are the ones who need to go slow and take it easy. Ebon looks thick enough to breed a zoroark!”
Midnight Maven: ... he is. Looking them up, I'm not sure why he'd want to breed one, though.
Glassie sauntered off, flicking her ribbon tail up and giving Ebon a good look at her hollowed icy cave as if to remind him of what he was missing out on. “Can’t wait to go exploring with you two tomorrow.”
Fertile Fields: Icy cave, eh? Big Mac sure ain't shy about sex, but I also ain't sure he'd want to stick his dick in one.
Midnight Maven: Shining Armor has—in a manner of speaking. I swished my mouth with Peppermint Schnapps a couple of times before going down on him. And you were right, Sugar High. It took his breath away...
Sugar High: Sugar High: Ha! I TOLD you it would work!
Midnight Maven: Midnight Maven: ... And nearly his erection. Took some healing magic and a few technomagical tweaks of his nerves for him to really enjoy it. After that near-debacle, I haven't quite convinced him to try the other extreme with cinnamon whiskey.
Daydream: Want to try them out on each other next date night, filly? There'd be no such issues with us!
Midnight Maven: You're on! Might want to try some Eevee roleplay, too...
Daydream: Fine, but just don't let the two Spikes catch us at it again! I think they're still traumatized by our last if-Midnight-Sparkle-won roleplay!
Hyperdash: Oh, REALLY? We all might want to get in on that one. Even Gilda!
Midnight Maven: Don't tempt me! Or Midnight Sparkle herself! Or else I'll do everything we saw of her in that OTHER reality!
Hyperdash: Promises, promises!
“We’re going to make history! Don’t stay up too late,” Ebon called back to her as she followed Sike into the tent, leaving the pair alone for the first time all day.
Edelweiss extinguished the fire with a bucket of water, stirring it up carefully and dousing it again until they were satisfied it wouldn’t start back up.
Sugar High: Sugar High: Aw... I was hoping that Glassie would use her powers to extinquish it!
Daydream: If she doesn't like creating snow for ski slopes, I imagine she considers putting out a campfire beneath her.
Crystal Queen: I can certainly respect that. I don't like using my powers for trivial matters either!
Hyperdash: Oh, yeah? And what do you call creating custom crystal statues to hold your all your outfits instead of just hanging them up in the closet like a normal person?
Crystal Queen: Crystal Queen: A good start!
“Brother?”
“Yes, Edelweiss?”
“My tent, now!” she lashed a pair of tendrils around his belly and began dragging him towards her own tent.
Fertile Fields: Ha! That's exactly what I've said to Big Mac a couple times. And I've dragged him into my tent on camping trips by the same method!
Midnight Maven: And me with Shining Armor, though I'm using techno-tendrils instead. I really like her assertiveness. The Midnight Sparkle part of me approves!
Fluttershine: You know, you get scary when your teeth get pointed and eyes go slitted like that, Midnight...
Daydream: As far as I'm concerned, she gets more sexy!
“Y-yes, dear!” he said as he made only a half-hearted show of resisting, letting his toeclaws dig into the ground as if he was being dragged there against his will. Which was anything but the case, but they did enjoy a little roleplay now and again.
Fertile Fields: Heh. B-M's the exact same way. I think he pretends to resist only 'cause he knows it turns me on.
Hyperdash: Oh, yeah? What about Apple Bloom?
Fertile Fields: Since she loves being tentacled, she ain't as much fun to drag off and doesn't quite get roleplay. But that's okay. I can still get her to do her homework by threatening to withhold it!
Crystal Queen: It's the same way with Sweetie Belle. I fear we may have addicted our sisters to tentacle sex.
Hyperdash: Eh, Scoots isn't quite that bad. I think she gets more off on just being with me and my parents.
And Glassie thought sylveons could be assertive! That was the last thought he had before he disappeared inside the tent.
Hyperdash: And there you go, girls! So what did you think, Fluttershine?
Fluttershine: Fluttershine: I think I really like this world. And if it's okay, I'd like to stay longer to see this adventure they're setting out on.
Hyperdash: Oh, don't worry, filly—I brought you and everyone else here for that very reason! There's plenty more to come, so let's give these two some privacy and jump forward in time a bit. As long as that's okay, Middie?
Midnight Maven: The power you use to jump us ahead six hours is miniscule compared to six months, Rainbow. So by all means!
Hyperdash: Right! So, hold on, everyone! Let's go... fast forward!
Hey, folks. While AJ_Aficionado goes under the knife to (hopefully) finally get a severe acid reflex issue fixed, I promised him something nice to come home when he starts his long recuperation. That something being a series of narrated longposts on existing chapters of Equestria Mystery Dungeon.
Like most people post-op, I have some mild reflux after surgery, but thankfully mild. I'm not on any medication however and there's no need for concern unless it persists for over 3 months. I'm cautiously optimistic I'll be able to eat like a normal person in a month or so.
Before I could go on, I'd like to thank you for leaving all these comments! Celebrating the beauty of Eeveelutions and ponies is a passion we clearly both share.
Fertile Fields: Tell me about it. That ride was rougher than the driving my brother's truck through the farm backroads when the suspension's out!
Thankfully. Applejack's body is not, in fact, like that of a backroad.
Midnight Maven: Ugh... speak for yourself, Sugar High. That ergosphere passage was awful this time. Did you have to take us through Sagittarius A right after it ate a star, Hyperdash? Especially after we'd just eaten lunch!
Putting the erg in ergosphere!
Daydream: You look none the worse for wear, Crystal Queen. Okay, so where are we? This doesn't look like a human or pony realm.
It is the best possible realm -- one of mythical sexy creatures called Eevees! And there's other Pokémon too!
Fluttershine: Okay. But um... I don't see any animals around. Don't sense any, either. Even the spirits of this place seem... odd. They're a bit surprised to see us, too. And I almost think it's because we're... human?
Goddamit, the human transformer didn't work! Get your head in the game, Arceus!
Sugar High: An Umbreon! Oh wow! Not just a pokemon, but an eevee! Are we really in a reality where they're real?
Fluttershine: A pokemon? But I hate that game and all the shows! They capture those poor things and use them for sport! I don't want to see an entire world full of that!
I'm glad Fluttershy addressed this point quickly as it's a valid, if misguided, misconception about Pokémon that it promotes animal violence. While the franchise is old, and trends and perspectives in writing have come and gone, death has always been treated as some horrible, especially of a Pokémon. Indeed, victory or defeat in contests is a distant priority to the themes of friendship and conservation of natural spaces that make up the bulk of Pokémon's stories. It's quite a natural fandom for one such as I to take refuge in now that MLP has largely rid itself of its own fandom — for better or (mostly) worse.
Hyperdash: But 'they' don't exist here, Fluttershine! Humans, I mean! These guys live free and clear! And they're real!
Fluttershine: Really? Oh, my! That changes everything. And he's so handsome...
I'm much softer on the mainline universe these days, having watched a lot of the anime movies and played some Pokémon Colosseum. But the Mystery Dungeon universe will always be my one true love for very similar reasons to why I love MLP; seeing these non-human creatures develop culturally and flourish in a pristine and unspoiled land free from humanity's limitations.
Fluttershine: And he talks!
Hyperdash: Yep! Just like you wanted!
Daydream: Well, guess that's better than just hearing them say their own name over and over...
One of the most annoying things about the anime. In the games, mostly, they make their own unique "cries".
Gen II Umbreon:
Sugar High: Treasure Town? Explorers bag? This is the right out of the games! I love it!
I'm a little proud of what I accomplished early on with this story. It's got all the cuddly cuteness of the games and... well it's straight-up porn rammed into all that for good measure. What more could a guy ask for!?
I just checked my cached websites for information on all the various games, and you're right. It's uncanny. I haven't played those games, but Spike does. It does raise some interesting questions, though. I mean, do the things our imaginations come up with reflect alternate realities, or are those realities somehow created by our own imagination via quantum effects that automatically generate a new reality? You know, maybe that should be the subject of my next science seminar.
Humanity is the only creature to ever demonstrate creativity. It's not ego to suggest it possesses an innate quality of divinity or is itself divine. It's not a coincidence that gods and goddesses of the world's religions reflect our own qualities as well as faults. The real terrifying question is where do all these universes go when no humans are around to create them? A disturbing question to ponder but I like to think we become folded into them once we die and the ideas these worlds create persist and the lessons they represent persist as indestructible information waiting to be learned again by those who come after.
Sugar High: I love it! Oh! OH! I know! We'll put it on BoobTube and call it the 'Godcast!'
"The Godcast" eh? That name has an interesting history on the internet! But I'll say no more. I'm barely into this comment and I'm smiling so wide. So much to comment on!
Daydream: Wow. They even eat the foods of the games.
Hyperdash: Wait—you've played them?
Daydream: No, but I've watched the two Spikes play through them often enough.
Midnight Maven: I'd rather have them playing that than Mortal Street Combat Fighter! Come to think of it, Princess Twilight is starting to get concerned that her Spike is getting addicted to human video games, too...
Hell yeah! Pokémon is wholesome as fuck and this is why ponies and eevees must have sex for our enjoyment!
Sugar High: Oh! Did you read that letter? So he knows a Glaceon, an Espeon, and a Leafeon! It's an all-Eevee team!
Singlehandedly keeping Q-tips in business! Bless them!
Crystal Queen: I'll take your word for it, darling. All I noticed was that they were just cute pink cats with a simply stunning gem on their foreheads. I should think about giving Opalescence one!
Espeon is such a powerful obsession of mine. While I've pegged myself as the "Glaceon Guy" the Espeon was the first Pokémon to catch my eye.
And it's not difficult to see why. It's like if my large-eared ponies actually existed but with paws instead of hooves! And the color palette of Espeon is pretty similar to the flash-animated G4 ponies as well.
Daydream: Yep, psychic types. I think every adventure team should have one regardless of franchise.
Sugar High: Well, then our adventure team is all set, because *you’re* a psychic type, Daydream!
Fertile Fields: Uh, so does this mean we’re a franchise?
Midnight Maven: Considering some of the realities we've seen where we're just a children's TV show whose brand is owned by a big corporation, maybe we are!
Hyperdash: Ugh! Those are my *least* favorite places to visit! I'm not a cartoon character! And worse, the fanbases there keep shipping me with everyone under the sun!
And you thought Amazon could deliver!
Hyperdash: I like her already! I wouldn't want to be nothing more than a weather maker, either! Pit fighting like me and double-F do as civies is far more fun!
Fertile Fields: Little unfair for us to be doing that now, though...
Hyperdash: They don't have to know that! We still gotta keep up our civilian image, after all!
You just made me realize something. I have a Rainbow Dash character in me after all!
Sugar High: Oh! We should totally grab one of those elixirs! Even a whole barrel of it! I could add them to my Sugar Cube Corner confections and use them to start a whole new line of energy drinks!
Funny bit of inside baseball: There are no elixirs in PMD: Darkness. The term used here is anachronistic, properly belonging to older games in the Pokémon franchise. I started this project a bit earlier than I really should have, like all my other longform fics.
Midnight Maven: Call me crazy, but something tells that adding magical cocktails from other dimensions to human drinks *might* have some potentially severe side effects...
Sugar High: Spoilsport! What's the worst that could happen?
Fertile Fields: Uh, maybe they cause people to turn into pokemon or gain Eevee-like powers?
Sugar High: I said the worst, not the best!
If I could just gain the boofy foxlike tail, that'd be good enough! I wouldn't say no to being able to learn "mimic" though!
Fertile Fields: Well, now! Looks like our boy Ebon Umbreon drills his own sister! Might be a bit taboo even here, but that makes him an Eevee after my own goddess heart!
Midnight Maven: Given we've all been with siblings and brothers by now, I think that pretty much goes for all of us! Except Fluttershine, that is.
Fluttershine: Um, no. I'm not going to be with my brother, thanks. I'm glad all of you have fun with your families, but mine...?
Crystal Queen: For as immature, irresponsible and obnoxious as Zephyr is, I don't think anyone here blames you, darling.
In no universe is sex with Zephyr okay!
Sugar High: I want Hoggin' Pawz! I WANT HOGGIN' PAWZ! We could make a mint selling Eevee ice cream at Sugar Cube Corner!
Daydream: Okay, I admit it might be interesting to try. But Oran Berry flavor like that carton says...?
I imagine oran berries tasting like something between a blueberry and a strawberry. I'd eat the hell out of that!
Daydream: Uh... who's Arceus and why is Ebon taking his name in vain?
Midnight Maven: As the name's usage suggests, he's basically the Pokemon creator. Their God—or at least, that's what some of the games imply from G4 onward.
I like to think Arceus is like if daddy came home from the liquor store after being gone for ten years! As an aside, this story had an alternate unpublished first chapter I foolishly deleted and... it's fucking hilarious! We get a conversation between Arceus and Discord and it's lost to the internet forever. I could cry.
Crystal Queen: I would be upset at him for swearing and for threatening her with sex, except for how flatterying he is to her! So what does this Glassie look like? She almost sounds like a lady after my own crystal-loving heart!
I did have some ideas in mind for future chapters with these two...
Sugar High: Aw... poor Ebon! All these cute Eevees around and he's not allowed any of them!
Fluttershine: The poor dear. He could always have me.
And me!
Fluttershine: Really. I've been with plenty of animals by now, and Eevees are intelligent. He looks like a fox and is even equipped like one.
Daydream: Nicely endowed, too. Snout's a bit short, but otherwise? Yeah, he could be an exotic fox. I'd do him as a mare or woman.
Fluttershine: Oh! Look at the mailbox. I want an animal-shaped one for my house. Maybe I'll make one later.
Hyperdash: Oh, yeah? Of what animal?
Fluttershine: Angel Bunny, of course!
Everybody: Of course...
I laughed out loud at that!
Fertile Fields: Reckon he makes it sound ilke a secret decoder ring out of an old box of Cracker Jacks...
Applejack ain't wrong! This is one of those really kiddy elements of PMD that probably should have never seen the light of day in this fic but I played straight just because I find it so fucking adorable.
Hyperdash: Ha! Sounds about right. Does he say that to you or to Apple Bloom?
Crystal Queen: Oh, dear. That sounds just like Hayseed Turnip Truck. An eager and earnest young colt, if a little... unaware of himself. Nice enough, and his heart is in the right place, but not a creature I would encourage to date a shy young thing like Sike there.
I never made the connection before but yeah... Bidoof is a lot like that!
“Glassie!” Edelweiss growled, pawing at the dirt road.
“Um… you’re welcome!” Glassie shouted back at Sike, indignantly.
“Glassie, I know you mean well, but you need to consult with your teammate before trying to pass her off like an unwanted hold item you pulled out of a nicket’s hoard,” Ebon said sarcastically. “I mean, do you even know if she likes guys?”
Everyone: Ebon!
I can't believe I wrote that! LMFAO Also, Nickits are another anachronism in PMD 2 - They don't show up until Gen 8 [Brilliant Diamond and Shining Pearl]. Also, I fucking misspelled Nickit, goddammit!
Crystal Queen: Bad show, darling. There are certain questions you do not ask in polite company!
Hyperdash: You're right. Even I know never ask a lady their age, weight, or whether they're into eating muff!
Hear! Hear!
Fertile Fields: Edelweiss is a 'Leafeon', right? I not only like her appearance but her personality. Also helps that her powers aren't that different than mine!
Crystal Queen: She's not bad, but
my heart goes out to Sike. Such a pretty kitty with that gem in her forehead! Why can't the other Eevees treat her well?I love Sike, enough to write her twice as she's mostly borrowed from my version of Lily Valley.
Hyperdash: You go, girlfriend! I really like Glassie! Good look and cool powers—quite literally!
Daydream: Well if nobody's taking Ebon's side here, I will. I'm already getting the impression he has his hands full with this crew.
Fluttershine: Me, too. I can tell he means well, even if he's sometimes a bit clumsy about it. Hayseed Turnip Truck is the same way.
If there is one thing I'm proud of with this story it's that people sincerely and unanimously enjoyed Glassie. The inside baseball is that Glassie is based on my character Linky (Twinkleshine) from my third story The Siege of Castle Harmony. But this version utilizes, at the time, eight years of learned experience as a writer. So in a way she's reflective of how far I've come as a hobbyist fanfiction fur freak author and I couldn't be happier to see her loved and accepted to this degree.
Hyperdash: Damn, dude! He's a typical guy, then. He's got a one-track mind and thinks with his second head more than his first.
Daydream: He's young, he's virile, and he's surrounded by three beautiful girls. I'd be more worried if he wasn't this way!
Hyperdash: Maybe, but fine—judgement reserved until I see him in action. I really want to see these four fight!
You will, friend. You will. I'll reply to the rest of your comments in time.
A bit of background music for the occasion. Let's go!
Fertile Fields: Uh, yeah. Reckon, this boy's got it bad. So he not only wants to screw them, he wants to knock them all up!
Crystal Queen: The breeding instinct of boys is not to be denied, darling. And despite what some say, it is not a bad thing.
Fluttershine: Um, I really won't complain if he wants to make more adorable eevees.
Midnight Maven: Odd that they lay eggs when they otherwise have mammalian anatomy. What are they, platypuses?
Sugar High: Nope! Pokemon, silly!
Midnight Maven:
Hyperdash: BWAAHAHAHAHA!
Daydream: I think you walked right into that one, filly...
The biological imperative of those who are hot is to breed more hotness. This is the essence of my writing.
In this story's case, it's also trying to make Pokémon make sense within the collectible monsters meta of the IP itself. It's not always easy.
Midnight Maven: Wow. Like synching smartphones. I wonder if I could use my technomagic powers to interface with those things?
Daydream: Well, it's using an odd magic instead of tech, but I don't see why not. You were already able to interface with the Friendship Map in Equestria, after all!
At the time, I was wondering if including this detail was a bit of overkill, like I was trying to overexplain game mechanics for the sake of a story. Then I realized, "yeah duh. This is something I wrote. It's always like that!"
Sugar High: Aw! He's never explored the passage of a Ponyta before? No wonder he's so hard up!
Fertile Fields: Trust you to make that joke, Sugarcube...
Sugar High: What joke?
One must wake up very early in the morning indeed to get invited to the Equestrian Fuck Fest.
Hyperdash: She ain't wrong, Umbrie. That's a bruh moment if I've ever heard one.
Daydream: You said it. Ebon seems good at committing them. I count two so far. Does Big Mac ever have any Bruh moments, Double-F?
Fertile Fields: Him? Nah. Reckon it's kinda hard to have one when you don't talk much and ain't that interested in impressing people.
Midnight Maven: Shining Armor, on the other hand...
All my prereaders made bruh jokes here! The real bruh moment is on Edelweiss almost admitting that Ebon is her brother!
“Aw, don’t worry Sike. I’ll keep you safe. Whatever they are, they won’t come anywhere near you.” Glassie breathed ice onto a nearby rock, freezing it solid instantly. “And if they target the whole room… well… at least you know how to dig a hole to avoid it.”
Sugar High: Aw... Sike's a scaredy cat!
Real talk: Dig is the best move an Eevee can get in PMD2. It covers enemies that typically have resistance to normal attacks -- Eevee is a normal type and dig is a rock-type move -- it reduces the damage you take by providing turn 1 immunity and has excellent burst damage when it triggers on turn 2. That said, Espeons are basically wizard cannons and wouldn't normally take the lead in any circumstances. This is all a long way of saying that Equestria Mystery Dungeon is not a good way to learn how to play the game.
So how do you play Pokémon Mystery Dungeon? Step 1: Get the Sky version of PMD. Step 2: Farm Revive Seeds from the Marawak Dojo. Step 3: Push through the main story on easy mode. The story is interesting enough to hold your interest on its own without having to be a massive chore to get though.
Midnight Maven: She reminds me of myself before ascension—at least the Twilight half of me. Very smart but shy and not knowing how to deal with bullies. Guess at this point she's not a lover, or a fighter.
Crystal Queen: Such an elegant and graceful creature should not have to be a fighter! She should simply be turning the heads of every Eevee she meets!
I'm starting to question how to go about handling the Mane Six interacting with Team Allure now. You're pointing out that Rarity would be every bit as taken in by Sike as by Glassie and it's hard to disagree.
Hyperdash: That isn't really how Pokemon society works, C-Q. Hey, at least she's got a big sister who'll stand up for her!
Daydream: I think Ebon will too, though I'm a bit concerned about his libido overriding his good sense with her.
So am I! (gulp)
“Glassie’s right, Sike. We’ll treat this like the final dungeon we’ll ever have to run and bring plenty of reviver seeds.” Ebon said, nodding. “Unfortunately, Glassie, I don’t think we’ll be able to let you just blizzard bomb the entire site.”
“Aww, why not, Ebon?”
“It’s a strong strategy but its strength is brittle. There are too many things that can go wrong in a dungeon you don’t know with strategies that rely on a single trick. Sure you can control the weather but other pokémon can too,” Ebon explained.
“Point taken, Boss.” Glassie chuckled. “You know, others say I think too much like I’m fighting in the arena. They might have a point, huh?”
For anyone curious about how Glaceon performs in the meta of arena battles, I'll post this video. Spoilers: She makes a strong case for being one of the worst Pokémon and the single worst Eeveelutions of all time. Yes, even worse than Flareon!
Fertile Fields: That IS a good point! Even before we ascended, Rainbow and I tended to mop the floor with fighters who thought they were hot stuff because they were good in high school wrestling ring or their local karate dojo. A real pit fight's a totally different beast!
My point exactly here! Glassie will have to learn this lesson a bit more painfully later on though.
Fertile Fields: Oh, get off yer high horse, filly. We don't injure anything but their egos. And besides, you could say that going to school or any other aspect of our teenage lives are beneath us all now. But me? I don't wanna be a goddess all the time! Sometimes I really do prefer just being Applejack, Senior student at CHS!
Fight Club had a point, even if that point is considered cliché in popular media now.
Daydream: I agree. And I’d also say that you can't condemn H-D and Double-F without condemning these Eevees, too, since they pretty much fight for a living! Both in the games and in real life, it seems...
Well said, Sunny. While they may be hot doggos living in the magical world of Pokémon, they are essentially mercs and any qualms they have about taking a particular job only serves to obscure this fact. Don't hate the player, hate the game as they say.
Daydream: It isn’t always, you know. Just like with the griffons back in my Equestria, fighting is a big part of their lives. You can’t take that away from them without taking away a big part of who and what they are
.
Fighting isn't just a necessity to Pokémon, it's their entire reason for existing. A mere glimpse at the evolution chains in any given generation shows one hero's journey after another. But they're no mere killing machines; Pokémon also develop through their interactions with others. Several evolutions only occur when their relationship with their partner reaches a requisite level of trust (Sylveon, Espeon and Umbreon) or only with certain other Pokémon in their party (Basculegion). The moral is that anyone can make it, even those who fail initially with support from their friends. It's a really sweet message and one that draws many parallels with MLP.
Hyperdash: Same with me and Gilda! And besides, Flutters, weren’t two of your favorite verses to visit the ones where you became a kick-ass commando?
Crystal Queen: You can stop with the smug look, Hyperdash. But oh, my. Look at Fluttershine blush!
I can't wait to see Rainbow Dash fight! She's going to humble some egos when all is said and done.
Sugar High: Hey, we head into the unknown every time we explore a new reality!
Which is why fiction will always be popular and why modern storytelling will always suck ass. What's the point of going into a story where you already know everything that's going to happen?
Fertile Fields: Whoa! Check out them apples! I'm actually jealous now. How'd they grow those? They're each as big as a melon!
Midnight Maven: I'm just trying to figure out how they're storing them. Is there a pocket dimension in their 'explorer bags'?
Indeed! Though, it's no bag of infinite holding. I find the restrictions placed upon Explorer bags tough enough that I'm constantly deliberating over what and what not I should pack. If you fill your bags, you can't loot but if you don't bring enough resources, you'll get KO'd and lose everything.
Fertile Fields: Okay, I now admit Ebon's able to think with his head and not just his cock. I don't know much about mystery dungeon game strategy, but it sure sounds like he knows his stuff.
Daydream: And a lot of what he's doing is centered on protecting Sike. He might be interested in her, but I'll also admit he cares for her.
Fluttershine: He really does. I can tell. In fact, they all seem to care for each other. They form a good team, just like us.
Hyperdash: Huh. Hadn't really thought of it like that, but you're right. Especially in light of what'll happen later...
Midnight Maven: No spoilers, please! I'm actually getting really curious where this is going...
Aww shucks! I'm glad the ladies see Ebon as more than just a sexy stud. He does care about his team and feels bad that they've been left behind after the success of their cohorts from Wigglytuff's Guild.
Fertile Fields: He's reminding me a lot of Big Mac again. Big Bro ain't much for abstract thought, but put something like a broken tractor in front of him, and he figures out what's wrong and how to fix it straightaway.
There's a lot of Big Mac in Ebon. Thankfully he's got more to say than "Eeyup" though.
Midnight Maven: I didn't forget, H-D. But I also didn't forget that the further in time you go and the more of us you take, the more draining it is for you, potentially marooning us there for a bit. By my calculations, traveling six months into the future from my arbitrary point with all six of us in tow would take you on average 5.236 hours to recharge enough to do it again, with the number rising exponentially with greater time distance traveled.
And not a charging station in sight! Curse you, Lithium Ion!
Daydream: And Arceus only knows what would happen if we were trapped away from Earth if some magical megathreat like the Sirens appeared. What? We're in a pokemon world, so I'm going to invoke a Pokemon God.
Palkia could probably help you go back where you're from under his own steam. But then you'd have quite a different problem!
ystal Queen: Or my boutique! And I did promise my sister I'd take her and the rest of the Destiny Seeking Teenagers bowling. It's their latest attempt to find a future profession!
Hyperdash: Okay, okay. We'll head back now. It was a good start, anyway. All aboard for the Galactic Central Black Hole Multiversal Express!
Midnight Maven: Ugh... just hope that ergosphere has settled down a bit...
I hope for their sake, the girls are only joking about a Galactic Central Black Hole Multidimensional Express. Once you start involving public transportation, the whole exploration angle to dimension-hopping goes straight out the window and you're left smelling homeless buttcrack until you reach the soul-sucking tedium of your wagey-cage. See you on the flip side, mon ami!
Part three response. Don't forget to read part 2 below!
Sugar High: Aw... but I wanted it to be bumpy again! Seeing us get stretched and distorted like a funhouse mirror was AWESOME!
Midnight Maven: So nice to know you enjoy gravitational spaghettification, Sugar High.
Mama mia! Pinkie's amused by a nightmare form of death for many people.
Sugar High: Well, DUH! I LOVE spaghetti! Especially with meatballs and extra parmesean!
Now I'm stah'vin! Of course, that's a granted when dealing with post-op diets...
Fluttershine: Yes, where?
Hyperdash: I checked ahead, and they should be right about... here!
You know what Pokémon Mystery Dungeon is missing? A bitchin' load screen. Like right here, this needs a bitchin' good load screen. This should do the trick! This one's from Pokémon Unite -- AKA the game where Glaceon is an overpowered monster who stomps your face.
Daydream: Or they're at the edge of the Apple Family Farm. That wilderness on the western edge is like stepping from a cornfiend into the most isolated area of Alaska.
Fertile Fields: Now don't be throwing shade on our land, Daydream! We deliberately didn't develop all of it! Guess we wanted at least one part of it to remain untouched and pristine. And besides, it ain't all wilderness in there. I've got my own little cozy hidey-hole for communing with plants deep in the woods!
Applemancer AJ! This is a concept I can get behind.
Sugar High: Or my metalworking shop! I cook up all sorts of chaos down there!
Daydream: When you say 'chaos'...
Midnight Maven: That's what I'm wondering. How do you set up remote magical statues? Do you know of a way, Daydream?
Daydream: Actually, yes—at least on Equestria. There are remote teleport spells unicorns can perform if you're powerful enough. And if you make them ride a ley line—which is in itself a trick—you could conceivably transport them a long way.
Crystal Queen: Oh? You sound like you have some experience with it, darling.
Daydream: Daydream: I do, but, uh... since it involved the some rather sinister machinations of my bad-girl self, I'd rather not say more.
Involving our homebrew Equestrian headcanon in this story becomes a lot easier once the action switches to Equestria itself. I'll keep this in mind for later.
Fluttershine: They hunt? I thought they just ate seeds and berries! But it turns out they eat... each other?
I think about this part a lot. Did I go too far? I think the worst part is that we're not given more time to examine the implication of mons eating mons, even though the story focuses on Eevees as cute talking animals. It's a microcosm of the issues of this story's beginnings as a whole, being forced to skim over the Pokémon World to reach Equestria.
Fertile Fields: Well, if you're really gonna have a pokemon only-world, there really ain't another option to get protein, Sugarcube.
Yes and no. The seeds and berries can do the job just fine but they don't exist everywhere due to... well, let's just say this will all get explained later.
Daydream: I wouldn't be so surprised, Fluttershine. I mean, look at them—a fox, a feline, and... well, I don't know what Glassie is, but they're definitely configured as predators. Even Leafeon likes meat.
Glaceon is most often associated with dogs in fan art. As has been commented on in chapter 3 -- I think... -- Eeveelutions are more likely to associate with cats, dogs, or foxes based on their personality and appearance. It's a way to create variations within kinds and make them more interesting than the cookie-cutter designs from the games. So you can have smaller more catlike Glaceons running around like Yumi from Blackravebow's laudible Youtube series, Pokémon Mystery Dungeon Rescue RPG who are the size of an Eevee.
Glassie is unremarkable in appearance. She's the size of a medium-sized dog and similar in appearance to the game model.
Ebon purrs like a cat but looks like your typical foxlike Umbreon. He also has your typical canid knot.
Espeon is the quintessential small, timid kitty with ears as large in proportion as you'd expect from an AJ Aficionado fic. She's the only female of the group with feline anatomy.
Edelweiss is built like a brick shithouse, just like her dear brother. She has a canine spade like Glassie.
None of them are shiny forms.
Sidenote: Edelweiss loves meat, especially her brothers! But I figure like any good venus flytrap, a meaty meal goes a long way.
Midnight Maven: I'm kinda surprised it's Ebon doing the hunting, though. You'd think those glowing rings of his would be a dead giveaway to whatever prey he's stalking at night.
Crystal Queen: Hmmm... does an Umbreon have an Umbreoff mode they can use on the hunt?
The Pokédex suggests Umbreon uses its rings to lure unsuspecting prey in before ambushing it. Since the beasts Ebon is hunting are "wild", one could suppose this would work just fine. If you choose to ignore the Pokédex — and no one will blame you if you do, it looks like it was written by an excitable eight-year-old — fan theories abound that there is indeed an "Umbreoff" setting that allows for stealthy night stalking.
Midnight Maven: Interesting idea, but I can't find any reference to being able to turn off his biolights in my cached web pages. Only a slightly humorous fan picture or two.
Crystal Queen: I was joking, darling. I'd suspect he uses his form's combat abilities to hunt.
To step into game nerd shit for a moment, Umbreon's attack stats are pretty weak. He's slow and has poor attack and special attack instead relying on endurance to overcome an opponent, slowly tearing an opponent down with toxic and bite while it futilely tries to land a defensive blow against Umbreon's thick hide that offers good protection against physical damage and superb defense against special damage. In the universe of Equestria Mystery Dungeon, far more animalistic rules will apply to the act of killing and Ebon will seek to ambush prey the old-fashioned way and deal a mortal injury early on before his prey can run or counter with something really nasty.
Midnight Maven: Now that I just looked up what a Jolteon was... yeah. Ouch!
More perverted-minded Pokéficionados (I just coined that, tyvm) headcanon a much less lethal tip to the spiky hairs around Jolteon's ass for the purposes of lovemaking but I dunno; that still looks like an unpleasant time to me.
Hyperdash: ... and we have bruh moment number three.
Fertile Fields: For as much as he keeps slipping, I'm starting to think our boy Ebon really wants it all out in the open, consequences be damned.
He'll get his chance, if only because I never really liked having him play coy about fucking his sister anyway or how I handled it in this story.
Fluttershine: Fluttershine: That poor bunny...
Introduced in generation 8. Yet another anachronism in this story. Honestly, would anyone care if I just ditched the pretense of this Mystery Dungeon story being confined to PMD Darkness?
Hyperdash: Just water? Somebody pour this Ebon boi a nice tall brewski!
Fertile Fields: And if they don't know what that is, I oughta stick around just to brew some up and show them!
In the spirit of your Turnabout Storm Novelization, Sensei, I think there should be a post-story chapter dedicated to Ebon getting drunk off his ass!
Hyperdash: Whoa. Could she be any less subtle about all this?
Glassie likes to save time.
Daydream: Well, he knows what he's supposed to say, anyway...
Fertile Fields: But it sure as hay ain't what he wants to say!
He's just trying not to lose his job! HR is a bitch when it comes to this sort of thing! Joke starts at 19:56.
Midnight Maven: Okay, I just checked my database as to what that looks like and... yeah.
Now you know why they say Ebon has a big heart!
Hyperdash: Wow. What a wingman! Or wingwoman... Or Wingglaceon?
Wingglaceon! I dig it!
I want to give this MASSIVE comment of yours the justice it deserves so I'm going to split my part 3 reply into two parts. Man... you really went all out for me!
Crystal Queen: She's just illuminating the obvious like one of my crystal spotlights, darling. Sike IS beautiful! But she needs to see it for herself.
I could say the same thing about Glassie. I wish I could go more into her character but she needs to evolve naturally over the course of the story. I want to point out that the Glassie in this story is basically the one in Snow Cave and that gal has a lot of issues. I like to think Sike needs to be more like Glassie and Glassie needs to be more like Sike.
Sugar High: But she's a Glaceon! Everything's cool with her!
Daydream: Have to say, when we last visited, I thought that Ebon was a bit sexually impulsive. But it turns out he's not even close to the worst of the bunch!
The line from Denim_Blue about the baseline of mine and your characters having two settings -- horny and half-horny -- comes to mind.
Sugar High: Worst? Glassie's the BESTEST! She's SO right and she knows it! I can't wait to see these four become like a pony herd!
Has everybody heard about the herd? Well everyone knows it's about the herd.
I want a herd, herd. Herd herd's the word. I wanna...
Midnight Maven: Well, if Ebon really is planning to knock them all up...?
Consider it done!
Fluttershine: Oh, my. I really hope he does. I'd love to see lots of little Eevees running around. I'd even raise a few back home.
Angel Bunny won't be pleased when they all learn 'tackle'.
Crystal Queen: I don't know about that, darling. Angel might be jealous.
The little monster might finally have some competition! And I don't just mean in ear length.
Midnight Maven: And that's to say nothing of the potential effects on having actual pokemon added to Earth's ecosystem!
Introducing them to the woods to help manage the deer population would be beneficial. Seeing one dead on the side of the road after being hit by a car, not so much.
Daydream: Yeah. Talk about invasive species...
Fertile Fields: Uh, isn't that what we are, here?
It's okay as long as you obey the Prime Directive.
Crystal Queen: Never been told? <swoons into a summoned couch> Darling, you ARE beautiful! And I hope your friends help you see it!
Hyperdash: Have to say, C-Q, I'm impressed that you summoned your chaise lounge from all the way across the multiverse!
Never leave the universe without it!
Hyperdash: Whenever I see a world where me and Gilda are estranged! Far as I'm concerned, we're meant to be together in every world across the multiverse!
Aww! The bad girl has a soft side!
“Glassie, what do you think is pretty about me? I have to know!” Sike’s forked tail twitch and spasmed as if dodging Zeraora’s electric wrath.
Yet another anachronistic Pokémon. At least I spelled Zeraora correctly. Generation 7: Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon.
Fertile Fields: Well, guess our Ebon's a perfectly normal guy after all!
Crystal Queen: Indeed. But for as brusque as Glassie can be, she can also be quite the charmer!
Ebon is a perfectly normal guy and I will insist this is true for as long as I live. And Glassie is probably the best character I've ever written. Really proud of her.
“But sylveon’s ears are bigger!” Sike slapped both forepaws to the side of her head.
“Sylveon’s ears are longer but not as broad.” Glassie countered, but then her expression changed from aroused to apprehensive. “Also, sylveons are kind of terrifying to me, especially under low-light.”
This is such an obvious case of the author speaking through his characters, that I have to laugh. Sylveon is cute (and also anachronistic in this story being a Gen 6 Pokémon) but there's something kind of alarming about its presence, you know? It's like looking at Pinkie Pie with her hair flat except Pinkamena also has fangs that can tear your throat out.
Daydream: Okay, what's a Sylveon?
Fertile Fields: Another type of Eevee. And to judge by a lot of the artwork and articles I'm seeeing, they're apparently an Umbreon's greatest bane...
This is not technically true but a cute nod to the fact that Fairy typing acts as a counter to Dark typing, which was considered to be overpowered in its day. Sylveon is a special-attack user and Umbreon's special defense offers it excellent protection to all such attacks -- even those that deal super effective damage. You want to know who Umbreon's true nemesis is? Fucking Heracross. One of the fastest Pokémon of all time where Umbreon is famously slow and deals powerful, super effective physical blows with STAB-boosted bug and fighting moves. Chances are Umbreon will get pulverized before you even think about recalling it from the battlefield.
That said, Sylveon does indeed have a very strong advantage over Umbreon and can even dismantle Umbreon's greatest nemesis -- fighter types -- with ease.
Sugar High: Oh! They're the bestest Eevee! They even have tentacles! And better yet, Sylvie gets shipped with Umbrie all the time!
Sylveon's ribbons are charming as hell, no? Pinkie would love Sylveon most of all. Both of them are super cute and also potentially dangerous.
Midnight Maven: Yeah, but they're usually depicted as Umbreon being captured and taken by her unwillingly. And I don't mean in terms of roleplay.
Sylveon and consent are like oil and water, sadly.
Hyperdash: I don't know, gang. They're almost starting to sound like something out of a horror film.
Daydream: Yeah. Five Nights at Freddys style...
Five Nights at Sylvies and on all five nights I took ribbons up the bum.
Midnight Maven: They're not *that* bad. In fact, I think they look quite pretty. But their powers and stats are basically anti-Umbreon, if that makes any sense. From what I've read, Umbreon were originally too OP, so they basically came up with Sylveon in later generations to counter him.
Depends on the meta. They are absolutely OP in Arceus: Legends where they can slap on Calm Mind and trivialize their anemic attack stats. But their meta on the battlefield is a bit more... mixed. Admittedly, he's done well for himself, overall and never became outright bad in any tier.
Crystal Queen: My oh my. I guess life really does imitate art!
Freud would have a field day!
Fertile Fields: Well, will you look at that. So Glassie gets her first!
Hyperdash: Mostly because I think she was the only one willing to try!
Daydream: Gotta say, that girl really knows her body language.
Crystal Queen: Confidence is contagious, darling. And sexy. She's truly a girl after my own heart!
Arceus helps those who help themselves! And Glassie loves to help herself.
Sugar High: Ha! Eat your heart out, Ebon!
Eat your sister out while you're at it.
Fluttershine: Oh, my. To see that look on his face. I think he'd much rather eat something else out...
Hyperdash: Flutters!
DB'd in the commentverse. Eyyyy!
Crystal Queen: Such a throaty purr! I never knew that sound could be used so sensually!
Hyperdash: Yeah? Planning to add it to your own repertoire?
Crystal Queen: Along with adding a gem to my forehead? I just might!
I want to see Rarity with a forehead gem now!
Midnight Maven: Shining Armor has—in a manner of speaking. I swished my mouth with Peppermint Schnapps a couple of times before going down on him. And you were right, Sugar High. It took his breath away...
Dayyyyyyyum girl!
Midnight Maven: You're on! Might want to try some Eevee roleplay, too...
God, that would be hot as fuck.
Fertile Fields: Since she loves being tentacled, she ain't as much fun to drag off and doesn't quite get roleplay. But that's okay. I can still get her to do her homework by threatening to withhold it!
Man, the Girls are really getting off on their own fantasies here! I'm learning as much about them here as I am reading Unleash the Magic!
Hyperdash: And there you go, girls! So what did you think, Fluttershine?
Fluttershine: Fluttershine: I think I really like this world. And if it's okay, I'd like to stay longer to see this adventure they're setting out on.
Stay as long as you'd like, girls! It's been a blast watching your explore your sexual peculiarities... and mine!
Hyperdash: Oh, don't worry, filly—I brought you and everyone else here for that very reason! There's plenty more to come, so let's give these two some privacy and jump forward in time a bit. As long as that's okay, Middie?
Midnight Maven: The power you use to jump us ahead six hours is miniscule compared to six months, Rainbow. So by all means!
Hyperdash: Right! So, hold on, everyone! Let's go... fast forward!
Amazing stuff, Sensei! Thank you. And I hope my replies recompense you in some way for your monumental effort. Thank you!
You're supposed to capitalize the Pokemon species names.
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I did not for reasons explained in the chapter 1 author's notes.
Wow, this has gotten off to a roaring start! There's just one thing it needs, and that's some actual comments on the content! Seriously, folks, I've been enjoying the back-and-forth in replies, but how about some commentary on the story itself?
AJA has left longpost after longpost on my works over the years, giving running feedback on my chapters, and they're some of my favorite comments just for how involved and funny they can be. In some small way, I'll return the favor here.
That's okay, Umbreon. You're already a dark-type anyway!
Sadly, all recently discovered portals only go to places like Narnia or Middle Earth. And those are too boring for words.
No you're not, Leafy.
And she's not even a turtle-type Pokemon!
For as much as I love Umbreon, I think it's the Espeon I most relate to. Given her ability to power up from sunlight, I wonder if she and Celly would get along?
Or Equestria. Whichever.
So name her the team's chief morale officer!
I'm sure Luna will find the dreams of Pokemon interesting, if she hasn't already. "Princess Cadance! By our starry mane, why dost thou insist on contacting these strange creatures? Their dreams are filled with nothing but food, fighting, and rutting each other senseless!"
"And this is different from the average pegasus, how...?"
Ebon? Edelweiss? I invite you to visit the realm of Thestralslovakia...
WANTED: Bred and alive.
What about you, big boi?
That's an easy fix. But when her love juices drip to the ground and cause plants to sprout, that's a little harder to hide.
Nice! That definitely wasn't there when I first preread the story.
Never use His Name in vain, or he might descent and smite you. Or at least cause something embarrassing to happen, like being discovered having sex with your sister.
You and me both, Umbie. You and me both.
Well, since I'm pretty sure the Gryphon Express Courier Service doesn't yet run out that way...
That's my rule too, but since I live alone, motivation is lacking to do it. I let my dishes pile up way too often.
I would too, given it came with a plastic decoder ring that looked like it came out of a crackerjack box.
Oh, come on, Umbie--I'm sure you've I've wanted to explore a Ponyta's passage yourself over the years.
You'd better have! All his stuff is Top Kek.
*boss music plays*
Hey, I wouldn't want to be asked out by some total doof, either. Especially not by the Pokemon version of Hayseed Turnip Truck
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A dimension away, Roseluck didn't understand why she felt suddenly mortified and a terrible urge to faint.
You know perfectly well that all she needs is a big, powerful, well-endowed Umbreon to sweep her off her paws, Ebon.
That's me two weeks after getting fresh testosterone pellets implanted.
Is this our lovely Glassie or my version of Limestone Pie?
"Yes, scream my name, Glassie..."
"WHAT?"
"Huh? Oh, Nothing..."
Just wait until Pinkpie starts pulling stuff out there Edelweiss doesn't even remember being put in!
I'm greatly enjoying all the added detail so far, and all the sexual tension in this group. I foresee absolutely no indulgences taking place on this most platonic of Eevee teams. Nope, nothing at all...
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It was my pleasure!
Cadance noped the fuck out once she was obligated to deal with Tom Bombadil's bullshit.
It's not fair to deny her the cross-eyed bear that you gave to her. You-You-You- oughta know.
There's going to be something snapping on her, though!
I imagine that if Sike were a shiny form Espeon, she really would be a green new deal.
Po-tay-to, po-taw-to. Horse pussy, canid knots. Variety is the spice of life.
cdn-img.fimfiction.net/story/gj0m-1629062033-501263-full
I can totally hear this conversation!
We've been spending most our lives, livin' in an incest paradise...
Eyyyyy!
I'm getting FRI flashbacks. Maybe I should add that later...
I borrowed that reference from Snow Cave.
It must be Hogwart's School of WItchcraft and Wizardry! You're a wizard, Ebon!
You'll shoot your eye out, kid!
Alas, he never has. If he did, he'd find he can take them all the way to the hilt.
Feels good, man!
An obvious choice coming from me, but in my mind, the best boss music anyone could ever have.
Oh god, I remember him! I wonder if there's clopfic of him? No, I'm not looking for it.
I may have had a couple of old characters of mine in my head when I wrote Sike and Glassie...
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Come get some, ladies. There's enough of me to go around! Mrrrooowr.
Yes.
It would be funny if that scene kept going!
It's just four young, fit, eeveelutions with ungodly massive ears going on adventures in an AJ Aficionado story...
What could possibly happen!?
Or it gets filled by other Eevees, Sike.
Can a girl have a bruh moment? I say yes.
Rainbow Dash would like this girl. I could see her challenging Glassie to a weather control contest.
"It's my fault, though. I'm just too hot an Umbreon."
<gets promptly frozen by an eyerolling Glassie>
Glassie's a class-traitor! And you know what that means!
If you know what I mean...
They were two weeks late because Ebon and Edelweiss kept sleeping in each morning for reasons they weren't at liberty to disclose.
Enslaved house elves from Harry Potter.
Perfect image.
Thank God girls can't read guys' minds. If they could and were in charge, we'd all be locked up for life.
Yes. I want to have sex with all three of you at once! he just caught himself from saying out loud, only to remember that Sike could read minds. He looked up to see her cheeks go pale, then bright red as she took several involuntary steps back from him...
I jest. Ebon's trying so hard to be honorable here, but it only makes him all the more desirable.
So Glassie has a weakness other than fire types! Well, you don't have to worry, Glassie. They'd go right past your shaking form and make a beeline for Ebon as an Umbreon anyway, ravaging him with tongue and tendril mercilessly.
That and being photographed while it's happening with his helplessness displayed for all to see.
Thanks for including this sequence. It defines the characters and grounds the story in at least a little more realism to start.
Or maybe an Alicorn Princess several times his size...
Sexy even without showing anything directly. Enough detail that I could visualize that scene easily.
Excellent opening chapter! It's the attention to detail that really sells this along with taking pains to establish the characters and their personalities as something more than total horndogs. Not that there's anything wrong with that, of course...
Really looking forward to more! I'll hit the second chapter tonight.
What was Foolers Rush In supposed to be a crossover with?
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That's exactly it. It wasn't supposed to be crossed over with anything. What ended up happening was it ended up being crossed over later on with Warcraft.
Hey, folks. While AJ_Aficionado goes under the knife to (hopefully) finally get a severe acid reflux issue fixed, I promised him something nice to come home when he starts his long recuperation. That something being a series of narrated longposts on existing chapters of Equestria Mystery Dungeon.
It was a tradition he started himself on my stories, when he wasn't writing much. His main creative outlet during that time was doing running commentaries on my released chapters, often using borrowed characters from his stories or the show. He gave me plenyt of meaty and witty comments, so I'm returning the favor here for the second time, and hopefully give him something to enjoy when he finally logs into fimfiction again.
I did a longpost on this once before, but this time, I'm doing it with a twist. So for those who wonder why there are enormous comments here full of color, I'm writing an AJ_Aficionado-style long post with my own peanut gallery, just as he's done on so many of my own stories in the past. But whereas he uses his favorite mares—the flower trio, Linky and Twinkleshine—to comment on my stories, I’ve decided to go with Humane 7 from Equestria Girls—or more correctly, the ascended-into-goddesses versions from my very M-rated Harmonic Resonance story, which I won't link here. If you're interested in it, you can find it on my story page.
Feel free to check it out, but be advised it is very adult. But for those unfamiliar with it, the Humane 7 basically ascend into Daydream form through sex and possess powers over and above their geodes and even the usual alicorn magic. You can tell who’s talking by the color of the text, and their powers are noted in the parentheses.
I reiterate that this longpost was personally requested by the author, AJ_Aficionado. The choice of characters for use in the longpost is mine, however. As the story the seven girls was ascended in very M-rated, you'll see references to it and some of their new *proclivities* here. Needless to say, they're a lot more open about sex than they were as humans and don't have many hangups remaining.
Hyperdash: ... And, here we are! Sorry about the turbulence passing through the Galaxy’s central black hole, there. Even my spacetime powers have trouble compensating for it, sometimes.
Fertile Fields: Tell me about it. That ride was rougher than the driving my brother's truck through the farm backroads when the suspension's out!
Sugar High: Are you kidding? That was Awesome! An even better ride than the best roller coasters at the Elements of Amusement Theme Park!
Midnight Maven: Ugh... speak for yourself, Sugar High. That ergosphere passage was awful this time. Did you have to take us through Sagittarius A right after it ate a star, Hyperdash? Especially after we'd just eaten lunch!
Hyperdash: Complaints, complaints. What are you griping about, M&M? You got to see a full-strength accretion disk like you always wanted and got a massive power-up from all the electromagnetic radiation!
Midnight Maven: True. The gamma ray emissions were incredible and they charged me up like you wouldn't believe. Right now I'm packing so much power I could probably take control of every electronic device on earth!
Fertile Fields: ... It's times like this I'm really glad you ain't Midnight Sparkle anymore, Sugarcube.
Midnight Maven: Me too. Might also explain why I almost feel like I have indigestion right now... ow...
Crystal Queen: Either that, or the plate of jalepeno poppers you downed with extra hot sauce, darling.
Daydream: You look none the worse for wear, Crystal Queen. Okay, so where are we? This doesn't look like a human or pony realm.
Hyperdash: It isn't! I promised Fluttershy we'd visit a reality that she'd enjoy next, right? She wanted a world where animals talk? Well, that's where we are!
Fluttershine: Okay. But um... I don't see any animals around. Don't sense any, either. Even the spirits of this place seem... odd. They're a bit surprised to see us, too. And I almost think it's because we're... human?
Crystal Queen: You mean they don't know of humans? That's unusual among the worlds we've visited.
Fluttershine: I'm not sure. I think they recognize us as humans but think we're not supposed to be here. I'm telling them that we're friends, but they're a little skittish. And um, why are you smiling like that, Hyperdash?
Hyperdash: Because there's good reason for that, Flutters! Just wait until you see where we are! So if everyone will grab hold of my wings, there's a certain place I'd like to whisk us...
Crystal Queen: Fine, but please try to go easy on the loop-de-loops this time, darling? It makes my breasts bounce hard.
Daydream: I don't see the problem, myself...
Midnight Maven: Wait... that's a black dog with red eyes and glowing yellow rings? He's...
Sugar High: An Umbreon! Oh wow! Not just a pokemon, but an eevee! Are we really in a reality where they're real?
Hyperdash: Sure are! What do you think, Fluttershine?
Fluttershine: A pokemon? But I hate that game and all the shows! They capture those poor things and use them for sport! I don't want to see an entire world full of that!
Fertile Fields: Yeah, reckon I'm with Flutters on this one, gang. Don't seem right to me that humans capture creatures that can fry them with a glance.
Hyperdash: But 'they' don't exist here, Fluttershine! Humans, I mean! These guys live free and clear! And they're real!
Fluttershine: Really? Oh, my! That changes everything. And he's so handsome...
Fluttershine: And he talks!
Hyperdash: Yep! Just like you wanted!
Daydream: Well, guess that's better than just hearing them say their own name over and over...
Sugar High: Treasure Town? Explorers bag? This is the right out of the games! I love it!
Midnight Maven: I just checked my cached websites for information on all the various games, and you're right. It's uncanny. I haven't played those games, but Spike does. It does raise some interesting questions, though. I mean, do the things our imaginations come up with reflect alternate realities, or are those realities somehow created by our own imagination via quantum effects that automatically generate a new reality? You know, maybe that should be the subject of my next science seminar.
Sugar High: Aw, how boring! Hey, why don't you invite us on instead? We'd liven it up!
Daydream: Sure. I can just see it now—the seven of us having divine roundtable discussions about everything from our favorite burgers to alternate realities we've explored and even demigoddess sex. It would be the ultimate podcast.
Sugar High: I love it! Oh! OH! I know! We'll put it on BoobTube and call it the 'Godcast!'
Hyperdash: She was joking, Sugar High! Though come to think of it, that's actually a perfect name...
Daydream: Wow. They even eat the foods of the games.
Hyperdash: Wait—you've played them?
Daydream: No, but I've watched the two Spikes play through them often enough.
Midnight Maven: I'd rather have them playing that than Mortal Street Combat Fighter! Come to think of it, Princess Twilight is starting to get concerned that her Spike is getting addicted to human video games, too...
Sugar High: Oh! Did you read that letter? So he knows a Glaceon, an Espeon, and a Leafeon! It's an all-Eevee team!
Fluttershine: Oh, I hope I get to see them all. Will I, though? It sounds like they're thinking about breaking up.
Hyperdash: You better believe it! Wouldn't have brought you here otherwise! And they won't be idle for long—you won't believe what they're going to be called upon to do!
Fluttershine: Oh, dear. That poor girl.
Daydream: Sike's an Espeon right? From what I remember of watching the Spikes play one of the mystery dungeon games, they're psychic-types and can really mess with your head if they want. Guess she was too scared or untrained to fight back.
Crystal Queen: I'll take your word for it, darling. All I noticed was that they were just cute pink cats with a simply stunning gem on their foreheads. I should think about giving Opalescence one!
Fertile Fields: Figures that you'd notice *that*, filly...
Daydream: Yep, psychic types. I think every adventure team should have one regardless of franchise.
Sugar High: Well, then our adventure team is all set, because *you’re* a psychic type, Daydream!
Fertile Fields: Uh, so does this mean we’re a franchise?
Midnight Maven: Considering some of the realities we've seen where we're just a children's TV show whose brand is owned by a big corporation, maybe we are!
Hyperdash: Ugh! Those are my *least* favorite places to visit! I'm not a cartoon character! And worse, the fanbases there keep shipping me with everyone under the sun!
Crystal Queen: How ungentlemanly! He should at least wine and dine her first!
Fertile Fields: That so, Miss I-Fulfill-Student-Sexual-Fantasies-In-Their-Sleep-For-Compliments?
Crystal Queen: Flattery is foreplay, darling!
Hyperdash: I like her already! I wouldn't want to be nothing more than a weather maker, either! Pit fighting like me and double-F do as civies is far more fun!
Fertile Fields: Little unfair for us to be doing that now, though...
Hyperdash: They don't have to know that! We still gotta keep up our civilian image, after all!
Daydream: There you go. A true professional.
Sugar High: Oh! We should totally grab one of those elixirs! Even a whole barrel of it! I could add them to my Sugar Cube Corner confections and use them to start a whole new line of energy drinks!
Midnight Maven: Call me crazy, but something tells that adding magical cocktails from other dimensions to human drinks *might* have some potentially severe side effects...
Sugar High: Spoilsport! What's the worst that could happen?
Fertile Fields: Uh, maybe they cause people to turn into pokemon or gain Eevee-like powers?
Sugar High: I said the worst, not the best!
Fertile Fields: Well, now! Looks like our boy Ebon Umbreon drills his own sister! Might be a bit taboo even here, but that makes him an Eevee after my own goddess heart!
Midnight Maven: Given we've all been with siblings and sometimes parents by now, I think that pretty much goes for all of us! Except Fluttershine, that is.
Fluttershine: Um, no. I'm not going to be with my brother, thanks. I'm glad all of you have fun with your families, but mine...?
Crystal Queen: For as immature, irresponsible and obnoxious as Zephyr is, I don't think anyone here blames you, darling.
Sugar High: I want Hoggin' Pawz! I WANT HOGGIN' PAWZ! We could make a mint selling Eevee ice cream at Sugar Cube Corner!
Daydream: Okay, I admit it might be interesting to try. But Oran Berry flavor like that carton says...?
Daydream: Uh... who's Arceus and why is Ebon taking his name in vain?
Midnight Maven: As the name's usage suggests, he's basically the Pokemon creator. Their God—or at least, that's what some of the games imply from G4 onward.
Crystal Queen: I would be upset at him for swearing and for threatening her with sex, except for how flattering he is to her! So what does this Glassie look like? She almost sounds like a lady after my own crystal-loving heart!
Hyperdash: You'll know soon enough, filly!
Sugar High: Aw... poor Ebon! All these cute Eevees around and he's not allowed any of them!
Fluttershine: The poor dear. He could always have me.
Fertile Fields: Really, filly?
Fluttershine: Really. I've been with plenty of animals by now, and Eevees are intelligent. He looks like a fox and is even equipped like one.
Daydream: Nicely endowed, too. Snout's a bit short, but otherwise? Yeah, he could be an exotic fox. I'd do him as a mare or woman.
Fluttershine: Oh! Look at the mailbox. I want an animal-shaped one for my house. Maybe I'll make one later.
Hyperdash: Oh, yeah? Of what animal?
Fluttershine: Angel Bunny, of course!
Everybody: Of course...
Fertile Fields: Well, at least he tries to be a good boss. That's more than I can say for mine at the Smoothie Shop! Sometimes I'm surprised I haven't used the wood of his desk and door frame to seal him in his own office yet...
Crystal Queen: My, such a darling little fashion accessory! It accents the red of eyes so well!
Fertile Fields: Trust you to notice that instead of his thick red cock, Crystal Queen.
Crystal Queen: Hmph! Appearances matter to me. And as far as otherworldly creatures go, my body is only available to dragons! I will never understand why my pony counterpart is so averse to them!
Fertile Fields: Reckon he makes it sound ilke a secret decoder ring out of an old box of Cracker Jacks...
Daydream: Okay, I know that the game map automatically updating is a thing, but Ponyta Passage? I don't remember seeing that when the two Spikes were playing. Is that a real place in the games?
Midnight Maven: Actually, no. At least, not to my knowledge, which includes all the information available on the internet.
Fertile Fields: I'd say that's pretty authoritative, Sugarcube.
Crystal Queen: My! He is direct, isn't he? I must say, I rather like that. He comes across as confident without crossing over into corny bravado.
Fertile Fields: Me too, C-Q! I like guys who use the honest approach instead of playing games.
Hyperdash: Oh, yeah? And has Big Macintosh ever said he'll just have to 'relieve his urges on you?'
Fertile Fields: Seriously, girlfriend? Big Mac's a man of action, not words! When he wants sex, he just says "wanna screw, sis?"
Hyperdash: Ha! Sounds about right. Does he say that to you or to Apple Bloom?
Fertile Fields: Yes!
Sugar High: Aw... I really wanted to see them screw! But yay! An actual Glaceon and Espeon! Just like you wanted, Fluttershine!
Fluttershine: I really did. And I like them a lot. Just like Ebon, they look so small but also so strong and sensual.
Crystal Queen: Oh, dear. That sounds just like Hayseed Turnip Truck. An eager and earnest young colt, if a little... unaware of himself. Nice enough, and his heart is in the right place, but not a creature I would encourage to date a shy young thing like Sike there.
Daydream: Well, his parents finally put him in braces, at least.
Fertile Fields: Now don't be talking smack about him! I admit he ain't the sharpest tool in the shed, but he's still my kin and is turning out to be a pretty good handyman. As for his overbite, the whole clan pitched in to pay for fixing it. We Apples always take care of our own!
Midnight Maven: You could just use your magic to fix his jaw, couldn't you?
Fertile Fields: I could, but I was in braces for three years, so I ain't gonna spare him the experience!
Everyone: Ebon!
Crystal Queen: Bad show, darling. There are certain questions you do not ask in polite company!
Hyperdash: You're right. Even I know never ask a lady their age, weight, or whether they're into eating muff!
Fertile Fields: Well, guess I can forgive him, then. I swear, Big Mac gets not right in the head either if he goes without sex for so much as a day.
Midnight Maven: It's the same with Shining Armor. If I don't relieve him every so often, he takes it out in other ways.
Daydream: Uh... what other ways?
Midnight Maven: Let's just say that when he gets horny enough, he isn't that picky which of my parents is around.
Fertile Fields: Edelweiss is a 'Leafeon', right? I not only like her appearance but her personality. Also helps that her powers aren't that different than mine!
Crystal Queen: She's not bad, but my heart goes out to Sike. Such a pretty kitty with that gem in her forehead! Why can't the other Eevees treat her well?
Hyperdash: You go, girlfriend! I really like Glassie! Good look and cool powers—quite literally!
Daydream: Well if nobody's taking Ebon's side here, I will. I'm already getting the impression he has his hands full with this crew.
Fluttershine: Me, too. I can tell he means well, even if he's sometimes a bit clumsy about it. Hayseed Turnip Truck is the same way.
Hyperdash: Damn, dude! He's a typical guy, then. He's got a one-track mind and thinks with his second head more than his first.
Daydream: He's young, he's virile, and he's surrounded by three beautiful girls. I'd be more worried if he wasn't this way!
Hyperdash: Maybe, but fine—judgement reserved until I see him in action. I really want to see these four fight!
Stopping there to keep this at least somewhat bite-sized. Hope you enjoy, AJA! More is definitely coming, though they may take me a while to get through given the length of this thing! Hope your surgery went well and recovery goes smoothly!
Beginning part 2 of the chapter longpost comment promised to AJA for his post-surgery recovery period. See the previous one if you want a rundown on just who these characters are and what this is all about.
Fertile Fields: Uh, yeah. Reckon, this boy's got it bad. So he not only wants to screw them, he wants to knock them all up!
Crystal Queen: The breeding instinct of boys is not to be denied, darling. And despite what some say, it is not a bad thing.
Fluttershine: Um, I really won't complain if he wants to make more adorable eevees.
Midnight Maven: Odd that they lay eggs when they otherwise have mammalian anatomy. What are they, platypuses?
Sugar High: Nope! Pokemon, silly!
Midnight Maven:
Hyperdash: BWAAHAHAHAHA!
Daydream: I think you walked right into that one, filly...
Midnight Maven: Wow. Like synching smartphones. I wonder if I could use my technomagic powers to interface with those things?
Daydream: Well, it's using an odd magic instead of tech, but I don't see why not. You were already able to interface with the Friendship Map in Equestria, after all!
Sugar High: Aw! He's never explored the passage of a Ponyta before? No wonder he's so hard up!
Fertile Fields: Trust you to make that joke, Sugarcube...
Sugar High: What joke?
Hyperdash: She ain't wrong, Umbrie. That's a bruh moment if I've ever heard one.
Daydream: You said it. Ebon seems good at committing them. I count two so far. Does Big Mac ever have any Bruh moments, Double-F?
Fertile Fields: Him? Nah. Reckon it's kinda hard to have one when you don't talk much and ain't that interested in impressing people.
Midnight Maven: Shining Armor, on the other hand...
Sugar High: Aw... Sike's a scaredy cat!
Midnight Maven: She reminds me of myself before ascension—at least the Twilight half of me. Very smart but shy and not knowing how to deal with bullies. Guess at this point she's not a lover, or a fighter.
Crystal Queen: Such an elegant and graceful creature should not have to be a fighter! She should simply be turning the heads of every Eevee she meets!
Hyperdash: That isn't really how Pokemon society works, C-Q. Hey, at least she's got a big sister who'll stand up for her!
Daydream: I think Ebon will too, though I'm a bit concerned about his libido overriding his good sense with her.
Fertile Fields: That IS a good point! Even before we ascended, Rainbow and I tended to mop the floor with fighters who thought they were hot stuff because they were good in high school wrestling ring or their local karate dojo. A real pit fight's a totally different beast!
Hyperdash: Yep. Gilda, too. Their problem without fail was that they relied on one skill or form and couldn't deal with a freewheeling fight. Gilds especially likes battling bruisers, because they thought more muscle made them invincible. She loves putting them down hard.
Crystal Queen: I still can't believe you three engage in such barbarity, especially after ascending! Aren't back-alley pit fights just a *tad* beneath you, now?
Fertile Fields: Oh, get off yer high horse, filly. We don't injure anything but their egos. And besides, you could say that going to school or any other aspect of our teenage lives are beneath us all now. But me? I don't wanna be a goddess all the time! Sometimes I really do prefer just being Applejack, Senior student at CHS!
Daydream: I agree. And I’d also say that you can't condemn H-D and Double-F without condemning these Eevees, too, since they pretty much fight for a living! Both in the games and in real life, it seems...
Fluttershine: Oh. I really wish they wouldn’t. Fighting is so wrong.
Daydream: It isn’t always, you know. Just like with the griffons back in my Equestria, fighting is a big part of their lives. You can’t take that away from them without taking away a big part of who and what they are.
Hyperdash: Same with me and Gilda! And besides, Flutters, weren’t two of your favorite verses to visit the ones where you became a kick-ass commando?
Crystal Queen: You can stop with the smug look, Hyperdash. But oh, my. Look at Fluttershine blush!
Sugar High: Hey, we head into the unknown every time we explore a new reality!
Hyperdash: Or crack open a book in class... I can traverse all spacetime, yet still don't know how I'm going to pass my next physics exam.
Midnight Maven: I'll help you. And speak for yourself, guys. I'm rewriting the physics books after all our black hole passages and explorations of the multiverse! And when I present my new grand unification theory of quantum gravity and special relativity to Dean Sombra at Everfree University, I just know I'll get named a full Professor and receive instant tenure!
Daydream: Now a goddess, yet in some ways still the same old Twilight...
Midnight Maven: And proud of it!
Fertile Fields: Whoa! Check out them apples! I'm actually jealous now. How'd they grow those? They're each as big as a melon!
Midnight Maven: I'm just trying to figure out how they're storing them. Is there a pocket dimension in their 'explorer bags'?
Daydream: Well, back in Equestria, we had something called storage gems that could magically hold a lot of loot. They were expensive, though, and exhausted their magic after only a couple uses.
Sugar High: Eh. Why bother? The entire multiverse is my storage gem!<reaches behind bush to pull out a plate of cupcakes and pass them around>
Daydream: Why bother indeed...
Fertile Fields: Okay, I now admit Ebon's able to think with his head and not just his cock. I don't know much about mystery dungeon game strategy, but it sure sounds like he knows his stuff.
Daydream: And a lot of what he's doing is centered on protecting Sike. He might be interested in her, but I'll also admit he cares for her.
Fluttershine: He really does. I can tell. In fact, they all seem to care for each other. They form a good team, just like us.
Hyperdash: Huh. Hadn't really thought of it like that, but you're right. Especially in light of what'll happen later...
Midnight Maven: No spoilers, please! I'm actually getting really curious where this is going...
Fertile Fields: He's reminding me a lot of Big Mac again. Big Bro ain't much for abstract thought, but put something like a broken tractor in front of him, and he figures out what's wrong and how to fix it straightaway.
Sugar High: That makes sense! I heard he the one thing he excelled at in school was shop class!
Fertile Fields: It's true. He didn't do that well in math, chemistry, or English. But dang if he ain't real good with tools, motors and engines. To say nothing of that new horsecock of his!
Crystal Queen: Gah! TMI!
Sugar High: OoooOooOoOooo... Tell me more!
Hyperdash: You said it, sister! Can't live with them...
Sugar High: Can't have sex without them! Okay, we can, but it's not quite as fun...
Hyperdash: On behalf of me and Gilda, speak for yourself!
Fertile Fields: Six months? We can't stay here that long, Hyperdash!
Sugar High: Yeah! We've got a band competition this weekend and there's a jam session with the metalworking club this Wednesday! We're forging Viking battle axes and I really don't want to miss that!
Hyperdash: I know, I know! Jeez, folks, after all the different verses and eras we've visited, you guys never seem to remember that I can time travel, too!
Midnight Maven: I didn't forget, H-D. But I also didn't forget that the further in time you go and the more of us you take, the more draining it is for you, potentially marooning us there for a bit. By my calculations, traveling six months into the future from my arbitrary point with all six of us in tow would take you on average 5.236 hours to recharge enough to do it again, with the number rising exponentially with greater time distance traveled.
Daydream: And Arceus only knows what would happen if we were trapped away from Earth if some magical megathreat like the Sirens appeared. What? We're in a pokemon world, so I'm going to invoke a Pokemon God.
Fertile Fields: I guess this place is really going to our heads, then. Well, that's fine with me. So let's call it a day for now and head back next week, when we've got some free time and Dashie's at full power again.
Fluttershine: Aw. I really don't want to go, but I guess we have to. I wouldn't want to be away from my animals at the sanctuary for more than a few hours, either.
Crystal Queen: Or my boutique! And I did promise my sister I'd take her and the rest of the Destiny Seeking Teenagers bowling. It's their latest attempt to find a future profession!
Hyperdash: Okay, okay. We'll head back now. It was a good start, anyway. All aboard for the Galactic Central Black Hole Multiversal Express!
Midnight Maven: Ugh... just hope that ergosphere has settled down a bit...
Beginning part 3 of the chapter longpost comment promised to AJA for his post-surgery recovery period. See Part 1 if you want a rundown on just who these characters are and what this is all about:
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Fertile Fields: Whew! And here we are again. Nice to see the passage through that 'ringularity' or whatever was a little less bumpy this time, too!
Hyperdash: You're welcome! I made sure to take it slow and easy this time for you wimps. Didn't want to upset Middie's sensitive stomach again!
Midnight Maven: Do you want me to post your reaction to meeting our world's Volare from right after we ascended to your channel on BoobTube, H-D? Because I swear I will!
Daydream: Ha! That was classic. You were so surprised you spilled a platter of drinks all over him!
Hyperdash: Okay, okay! Jeez, a goddess can't even make a joke anymore...
Sugar High: Aw... but I wanted it to be bumpy again! Seeing us get stretched and distorted like a funhouse mirror was AWESOME!
Midnight Maven: So nice to know you enjoy gravitational spaghettification, Sugar High.
Sugar High: Well, DUH! I LOVE spaghetti! Especially with meatballs and extra parmesean!
Midnight Maven: ... Why do I even bother?
Crystal Queen: I don't know, darling, but it can wait. So where's our favorite team of Eevees now?
Fluttershine: Yes, where?
Hyperdash: I checked ahead, and they should be right about... here!
Daydream: Or they're at the edge of the Apple Family Farm. That wilderness on the western edge is like stepping from a cornfiend into the most isolated area of Alaska.
Fertile Fields: Now don't be throwing shade on our land, Daydream! We deliberately didn't develop all of it! Guess we wanted at least one part of it to remain untouched and pristine. And besides, it ain't all wilderness in there. I've got my own little cozy hidey-hole for communing with plants deep in the woods!
Sugar High: Aw... and you've never showed us?
Fertile Fields: Well, it's kinda my private little goddess sanctuary there. And no offense, but think I'd rather keep it that way, too.
Crystal Queen: I sympathize, darling. I feel the same way about my inspiration room, which is now as much about communing with my crystals as fashion design!
Midnight Maven: Or me with my lab.
Sugar High: Or my metalworking shop! I cook up all sorts of chaos down there!
Daydream: When you say 'chaos'...
Sugar High: Sorry, no spoilers!
Fertile Fields: I really don't like it when your hair falls flat and you smile like that, Sugarcube...
Midnight Maven: That's what I'm wondering. How do you set up remote magical statues? Do you know of a way, Daydream?
Daydream: Actually, yes—at least on Equestria. There are remote teleport spells unicorns can perform if you're powerful enough. And if you make them ride a ley line—which is in itself a trick—you could conceivably transport them a long way.
Crystal Queen: Oh? You sound like you have some experience with it, darling.
Daydream: Daydream: I do, but, uh... since it involved the some rather sinister machinations of my bad-girl self, I'd rather not say more.
Fluttershine: They hunt? I thought they just ate seeds and berries! But it turns out they eat... each other?
Fertile Fields: Well, if you're really gonna have a pokemon only-world, there really ain't another option to get protein, Sugarcube.
Daydream: I wouldn't be so surprised, Fluttershine. I mean, look at them—a fox, a feline, and... well, I don't know what Glassie is, but they're definitely configured as predators. Even Leafeon likes meat.
Midnight Maven: I'm kinda surprised it's Ebon doing the hunting, though. You'd think those glowing rings of his would be a dead giveaway to whatever prey he's stalking at night.
Crystal Queen: Hmmm... does an Umbreon have an Umbreoff mode they can use on the hunt?
Sugar High: Oooo... I like that turn of phrase!
Midnight Maven: Interesting idea, but I can't find any reference to being able to turn off his biolights in my cached web pages. Only a slightly humorous fan picture or two.
Crystal Queen: I was joking, darling. I'd suspect he uses his form's combat abilities to hunt.
Midnight Maven: Good point. Yeah, some of his abilities would certainly be useful.
Midnight Maven: Now that I just looked up what a Jolteon was... yeah. Ouch!
Hyperdash: ... and we have bruh moment number three.
Fertile Fields: For as much as he keeps slipping, I'm starting to think our boy Ebon really wants it all out in the open, consequences be damned.
Crystal Queen: Darling! Language!
Fluttershine: Fluttershine: That poor bunny...
Fertile Fields: They're living off the land, filly. If you'll notice, there ain't exactly much in the way of seeds or fruit trees around.
Midnight Maven: Since there aren't any stores or fruit trees around, they have to hunt, Fluttershine. The predator/prey dynamic is something not even we can ever change.
Fluttershine: Oh, I know, but... I guess seeing a bunny killed and eaten hits a little too close to home for me.
Crystal Queen: Because of Angel Bunny?
Fluttershine: Yes. I don't know what I'd do if something like that happened to him.
Fertile Fields: Given every animal on the planet now knows you, I doubt any of them would dare hurt him, Sugarcube.
Daydream: I'd be more worried of him taking advantage of that fact, myself.
Hyperdash: Just water? Somebody pour this Ebon boi a nice tall brewski!
Fertile Fields: And if they don't know what that is, I oughta stick around just to brew some up and show them!
Hyperdash: Whoa. Could she be any less subtle about all this?
Fertile Fields: Ya'll, I think I like Glassie. She's as brutally honest as Sugarcoat without being so cold and uncaring about it. She at least tries to cushion it but doesn't lie to do it.
Crystal Queen: I like her too. She's right, we really shouldn't be.
Hyperdash: Uh, since when have we ever?
Daydream: Never, since ascension. And given how we got together, guess I'm hoping these four do to.
Fluttershine: Me too. They seem almost as close to each other as we are and are genuinely good friends, not just teammates.
Daydream: Well, he knows what he's supposed to say, anyway...
Fertile Fields: But it sure as hay ain't what he wants to say!
Sugar High: Oh! Oh! Let's bring Triton and Chest Candy with us next time! They're connoiseurs of oral and should be able to evaluate the skill of these three properly!
Fertile Fields: I think that might be a mite much to ask Sike right now, Sugarcube.
Midnight Maven: Okay, I just checked my database as to what that looks like and... yeah.
Hyperdash: Wow. What a wingman! Or wingwoman... Or Wingglaceon?
Crystal Queen: She's just illuminating the obvious like one of my crystal spotlights, darling. Sike IS beautiful! But she needs to see it for herself.
Sugar High: But she's a Glaceon! Everything's cool with her!
Fertile Fields: Whoa. That's really putting him on the spot!
Daydream: Yeah, that might be pushing a bit too hard. Starting to think Glassie wants them all to get together as much as Ebon!
Midnight Maven: Yeah, except she's a lot more open about it. I think I'm with Fertile Fields on this one. I rather like her.
Daydream: Have to say, when we last visited, I thought that Ebon was a bit sexually impulsive. But it turns out he's not even close to the worst of the bunch!
Sugar High: Worst? Glassie's the BESTEST! She's SO right and she knows it! I can't wait to see these four become like a pony herd!
Daydream: Uh, herd or just friends with benefits?
Midnight Maven: Well, if Ebon really is planning to knock them all up...?
Fluttershine: Oh, my. I really hope he does. I'd love to see lots of little Eevees running around. I'd even raise a few back home.
Crystal Queen: I don't know about that, darling. Angel might be jealous.
Midnight Maven: And that's to say nothing of the potential effects on having actual pokemon added to Earth's ecosystem!
Daydream: Yeah. Talk about invasive species...
Fertile Fields: Uh, isn't that what we are, here?
Crystal Queen: Never been told? <swoons into a summoned couch> Darling, you ARE beautiful! And I hope your friends help you see it!
Hyperdash: Have to say, C-Q, I'm impressed that you summoned your chaise lounge from all the way across the multiverse!
Crystal Queen: And now me as well! I must say, I'm tempted to appear to them right now and set her straight!
Fertile Fields: We can't interfere in other realms, Sugarcube. You know that.
Hyperdash: Yeah. No matter how tempting...
Fertile Fields: Oh, yeah? And when were you tempted?
Hyperdash: Whenever I see a world where me and Gilda are estranged! Far as I'm concerned, we're meant to be together in every world across the multiverse!
Fertile Fields: Well, guess our Ebon's a perfectly normal guy after all!
Crystal Queen: Indeed. But for as brusque as Glassie can be, she can also be quite the charmer!
Daydream: Okay, what's a Sylveon?
Fertile Fields: Another type of Eevee. And to judge by a lot of the artwork and articles I'm seeeing, they're apparently an Umbreon's greatest bane...
Sugar High: Oh! They're the bestest Eevee! They even have tentacles! And better yet, Sylvie gets shipped with Umbrie all the time!
Fertile Fields: Oh, Really? Then this gang definitely needs one!
Midnight Maven: Yeah, but they're usually depicted as Umbreon being captured and taken by her unwillingly. And I don't mean in terms of roleplay.
Fertile Fields: Oh. Well, I don't know 'bout that...
Crystal Queen: Nor I. And nor, does it seem, do they.
Hyperdash: I don't know, gang. They're almost starting to sound like something out of a horror film.
Daydream: Yeah. Five Nights at Freddys style...
Midnight Maven: They're not *that* bad. In fact, I think they look quite pretty. But their powers and stats are basically anti-Umbreon, if that makes any sense. From what I've read, Umbreon were originally too OP, so they basically came up with Sylveon in later generations to counter him.
Daydream: Interesting.
Hyperdash: Too OP, huh? Just like us!
Crystal Queen: My oh my. I guess life really does imitate art!
Midnight Maven: Or our art imitates multiversal life... once again, the question should be asked: do these worlds reflect our imaginations and are somehow generated by them? Or do our imaginations simply reflect what already exists elsewhere in the infinite multiverse, where all things are not only possible, but real?
Fertile Fields: Well, I ain't no scientist, but seems to me that's a distinction without a difference, Sugarcube...
Midnight Maven: ... true. And even for all my massive processing power, my mind goes into logic lock just thinking about it...
Fertile Fields: Well, will you look at that. So Glassie gets her first!
Hyperdash: Mostly because I think she was the only one willing to try!
Daydream: Gotta say, that girl really knows her body language.
Crystal Queen: Confidence is contagious, darling. And sexy. She's truly a girl after my own heart!
Sugar High: Ha! Eat your heart out, Ebon!
Fluttershine: Oh, my. To see that look on his face. I think he'd much rather eat something else out...
Hyperdash: Flutters!
Fluttershine: Well, it's true. And I bet he could do it as well as Big Mac with that tongue.
Fertile Fields: Say WHAT now? And just when has that boy been doing that?
Fluttershine: Every week when he comes over to help out at my sanctuary. Its his favorite thing to do with me now. He's gotten really good at it, and I really enjoy it. Even some of my animals are jealous of him.
Fertile Fields: Huh... had no idea. Soon as I get back, we're gonna have a long talk!
Daydream: Somehow, I don't think there's going to be much talking involved...
Crystal Queen: Such a throaty purr! I never knew that sound could be used so sensually!
Hyperdash: Yeah? Planning to add it to your own repertoire?
Crystal Queen: Along with adding a gem to my forehead? I just might!
Crystal Queen: I most certainly do!
Daydream: Like C-Q said before, flattery is foreplay! Even with Eevees, it seems...
Fertile Fields: My thoughts exactly. You'd best tread very carefully, Glassie. A bad first time with anyone can set you back a long way.
Crystal Queen: It sounds like you're speaking from experience, darling.
Fertile Fields: ... I am, and we'll leave it at that.
Daydream: I'm calling it now, girls: Fat chance, even without our intervention.
Fertile Fields: You said it, Sugarcube. So I'm calling it now, too: All four of these colts and fillies'll form a herd before this 'mission' of theirs is done.
Sugar High: YAY! And I can't wait to watch it happen!
Hyperdash: Yeah, yeah. Look, sex is fun, but I'd really like to see some fighting, too. Thankfully, having looked ahead, I already know some is coming!
Midnight Maven: No spoilers, please!
Fluttershine: Oh, dear. Just so long as they're not fighting with each other...
Midnight Maven: ... he is. Looking them up, I'm not sure why he'd want to breed one, though.
Fertile Fields: Icy cave, eh? Big Mac sure ain't shy about sex, but I also ain't sure he'd want to stick his dick in one.
Midnight Maven: Shining Armor has—in a manner of speaking. I swished my mouth with Peppermint Schnapps a couple of times before going down on him. And you were right, Sugar High. It took his breath away...
Sugar High: Sugar High: Ha! I TOLD you it would work!
Midnight Maven: Midnight Maven: ... And nearly his erection. Took some healing magic and a few technomagical tweaks of his nerves for him to really enjoy it. After that near-debacle, I haven't quite convinced him to try the other extreme with cinnamon whiskey.
Daydream: Want to try them out on each other next date night, filly? There'd be no such issues with us!
Midnight Maven: You're on! Might want to try some Eevee roleplay, too...
Daydream: Fine, but just don't let the two Spikes catch us at it again! I think they're still traumatized by our last if-Midnight-Sparkle-won roleplay!
Hyperdash: Oh, REALLY? We all might want to get in on that one. Even Gilda!
Midnight Maven: Don't tempt me! Or Midnight Sparkle herself! Or else I'll do everything we saw of her in that OTHER reality!
Hyperdash: Promises, promises!
Sugar High: Sugar High: Aw... I was hoping that Glassie would use her powers to extinquish it!
Daydream: If she doesn't like creating snow for ski slopes, I imagine she considers putting out a campfire beneath her.
Crystal Queen: I can certainly respect that. I don't like using my powers for trivial matters either!
Hyperdash: Oh, yeah? And what do you call creating custom crystal statues to hold your all your outfits instead of just hanging them up in the closet like a normal person?
Crystal Queen: Crystal Queen: A good start!
Fertile Fields: Ha! That's exactly what I've said to Big Mac a couple times. And I've dragged him into my tent on camping trips by the same method!
Midnight Maven: And me with Shining Armor, though I'm using techno-tendrils instead. I really like her assertiveness. The Midnight Sparkle part of me approves!
Fluttershine: You know, you get scary when your teeth get pointed and eyes go slitted like that, Midnight...
Daydream: As far as I'm concerned, she gets more sexy!
Fertile Fields: Heh. B-M's the exact same way. I think he pretends to resist only 'cause he knows it turns me on.
Hyperdash: Oh, yeah? What about Apple Bloom?
Fertile Fields: Since she loves being tentacled, she ain't as much fun to drag off and doesn't quite get roleplay. But that's okay. I can still get her to do her homework by threatening to withhold it!
Crystal Queen: It's the same way with Sweetie Belle. I fear we may have addicted our sisters to tentacle sex.
Hyperdash: Eh, Scoots isn't quite that bad. I think she gets more off on just being with me and my parents.
Hyperdash: And there you go, girls! So what did you think, Fluttershine?
Fluttershine: Fluttershine: I think I really like this world. And if it's okay, I'd like to stay longer to see this adventure they're setting out on.
Hyperdash: Oh, don't worry, filly—I brought you and everyone else here for that very reason! There's plenty more to come, so let's give these two some privacy and jump forward in time a bit. As long as that's okay, Middie?
Midnight Maven: The power you use to jump us ahead six hours is miniscule compared to six months, Rainbow. So by all means!
Hyperdash: Right! So, hold on, everyone! Let's go... fast forward!
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Like most people post-op, I have some mild reflux after surgery, but thankfully mild. I'm not on any medication however and there's no need for concern unless it persists for over 3 months. I'm cautiously optimistic I'll be able to eat like a normal person in a month or so.
Before I could go on, I'd like to thank you for leaving all these comments! Celebrating the beauty of Eeveelutions and ponies is a passion we clearly both share.
Thankfully. Applejack's body is not, in fact, like that of a backroad.
Putting the erg in ergosphere!
It is the best possible realm -- one of mythical sexy creatures called Eevees! And there's other Pokémon too!
Goddamit, the human transformer didn't work! Get your head in the game, Arceus!
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The best reality!
I'm glad Fluttershy addressed this point quickly as it's a valid, if misguided, misconception about Pokémon that it promotes animal violence. While the franchise is old, and trends and perspectives in writing have come and gone, death has always been treated as some horrible, especially of a Pokémon. Indeed, victory or defeat in contests is a distant priority to the themes of friendship and conservation of natural spaces that make up the bulk of Pokémon's stories. It's quite a natural fandom for one such as I to take refuge in now that MLP has largely rid itself of its own fandom — for better or (mostly) worse.
I'm much softer on the mainline universe these days, having watched a lot of the anime movies and played some Pokémon Colosseum. But the Mystery Dungeon universe will always be my one true love for very similar reasons to why I love MLP; seeing these non-human creatures develop culturally and flourish in a pristine and unspoiled land free from humanity's limitations.
One of the most annoying things about the anime. In the games, mostly, they make their own unique "cries".
Gen II Umbreon:
I'm a little proud of what I accomplished early on with this story. It's got all the cuddly cuteness of the games and... well it's straight-up porn rammed into all that for good measure. What more could a guy ask for!?
Humanity is the only creature to ever demonstrate creativity. It's not ego to suggest it possesses an innate quality of divinity or is itself divine. It's not a coincidence that gods and goddesses of the world's religions reflect our own qualities as well as faults. The real terrifying question is where do all these universes go when no humans are around to create them? A disturbing question to ponder but I like to think we become folded into them once we die and the ideas these worlds create persist and the lessons they represent persist as indestructible information waiting to be learned again by those who come after.
"The Godcast" eh? That name has an interesting history on the internet! But I'll say no more. I'm barely into this comment and I'm smiling so wide. So much to comment on!
Hell yeah! Pokémon is wholesome as fuck and this is why ponies and eevees must have sex for our enjoyment!
Singlehandedly keeping Q-tips in business! Bless them!
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Espeon is such a powerful obsession of mine. While I've pegged myself as the "Glaceon Guy" the Espeon was the first Pokémon to catch my eye.
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And it's not difficult to see why. It's like if my large-eared ponies actually existed but with paws instead of hooves! And the color palette of Espeon is pretty similar to the flash-animated G4 ponies as well.
And you thought Amazon could deliver!
You just made me realize something. I have a Rainbow Dash character in me after all!
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Daydream: There you go. A true professional.
Funny bit of inside baseball: There are no elixirs in PMD: Darkness. The term used here is anachronistic, properly belonging to older games in the Pokémon franchise. I started this project a bit earlier than I really should have, like all my other longform fics.
If I could just gain the boofy foxlike tail, that'd be good enough! I wouldn't say no to being able to learn "mimic" though!
In no universe is sex with Zephyr okay!
I imagine oran berries tasting like something between a blueberry and a strawberry. I'd eat the hell out of that!
I like to think Arceus is like if daddy came home from the liquor store after being gone for ten years! As an aside, this story had an alternate unpublished first chapter I foolishly deleted and... it's fucking hilarious! We get a conversation between Arceus and Discord and it's lost to the internet forever. I could cry.
I did have some ideas in mind for future chapters with these two...
And me!
The creation of Eevee is a fascinating tale.
Click the link to learn more!
I laughed out loud at that!
Applejack ain't wrong! This is one of those really kiddy elements of PMD that probably should have never seen the light of day in this fic but I played straight just because I find it so fucking adorable.
Chad yes forever!
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I never made the connection before but yeah... Bidoof is a lot like that!
I can't believe I wrote that! LMFAO Also, Nickits are another anachronism in PMD 2 - They don't show up until Gen 8 [Brilliant Diamond and Shining Pearl]. Also, I fucking misspelled Nickit, goddammit!
Hear! Hear!
my heart goes out to Sike. Such a pretty kitty with that gem in her forehead! Why can't the other Eevees treat her well?I love Sike, enough to write her twice as she's mostly borrowed from my version of Lily Valley.
- MLP: FiM
- Drama
- Slice of Life
Lily Valley goes shopping after discovering that somepony finished off the last of the milk. She discovers someone unexpected along the way.If there is one thing I'm proud of with this story it's that people sincerely and unanimously enjoyed Glassie. The inside baseball is that Glassie is based on my character Linky (Twinkleshine) from my third story The Siege of Castle Harmony. But this version utilizes, at the time, eight years of learned experience as a writer. So in a way she's reflective of how far I've come as a hobbyist fanfiction fur freak author and I couldn't be happier to see her loved and accepted to this degree.
You will, friend. You will. I'll reply to the rest of your comments in time.
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Part two of my reply starts here.
A bit of background music for the occasion. Let's go!
The biological imperative of those who are hot is to breed more hotness. This is the essence of my writing.
In this story's case, it's also trying to make Pokémon make sense within the collectible monsters meta of the IP itself. It's not always easy.
At the time, I was wondering if including this detail was a bit of overkill, like I was trying to overexplain game mechanics for the sake of a story. Then I realized, "yeah duh. This is something I wrote. It's always like that!"
One must wake up very early in the morning indeed to get invited to the Equestrian Fuck Fest.
All my prereaders made bruh jokes here! The real bruh moment is on Edelweiss almost admitting that Ebon is her brother!
Real talk: Dig is the best move an Eevee can get in PMD2. It covers enemies that typically have resistance to normal attacks -- Eevee is a normal type and dig is a rock-type move -- it reduces the damage you take by providing turn 1 immunity and has excellent burst damage when it triggers on turn 2. That said, Espeons are basically wizard cannons and wouldn't normally take the lead in any circumstances. This is all a long way of saying that Equestria Mystery Dungeon is not a good way to learn how to play the game.
So how do you play Pokémon Mystery Dungeon? Step 1: Get the Sky version of PMD. Step 2: Farm Revive Seeds from the Marawak Dojo. Step 3: Push through the main story on easy mode. The story is interesting enough to hold your interest on its own without having to be a massive chore to get though.
I'm starting to question how to go about handling the Mane Six interacting with Team Allure now. You're pointing out that Rarity would be every bit as taken in by Sike as by Glassie and it's hard to disagree.
So am I! (gulp)
For anyone curious about how Glaceon performs in the meta of arena battles, I'll post this video. Spoilers: She makes a strong case for being one of the worst Pokémon and the single worst Eeveelutions of all time. Yes, even worse than Flareon!
My point exactly here! Glassie will have to learn this lesson a bit more painfully later on though.
Fight Club had a point, even if that point is considered cliché in popular media now.
Well said, Sunny. While they may be hot doggos living in the magical world of Pokémon, they are essentially mercs and any qualms they have about taking a particular job only serves to obscure this fact. Don't hate the player, hate the game as they say.
.
Fighting isn't just a necessity to Pokémon, it's their entire reason for existing. A mere glimpse at the evolution chains in any given generation shows one hero's journey after another. But they're no mere killing machines; Pokémon also develop through their interactions with others. Several evolutions only occur when their relationship with their partner reaches a requisite level of trust (Sylveon, Espeon and Umbreon) or only with certain other Pokémon in their party (Basculegion). The moral is that anyone can make it, even those who fail initially with support from their friends. It's a really sweet message and one that draws many parallels with MLP.
I can't wait to see Rainbow Dash fight! She's going to humble some egos when all is said and done.
Which is why fiction will always be popular and why modern storytelling will always suck ass. What's the point of going into a story where you already know everything that's going to happen?
Indeed! Though, it's no bag of infinite holding. I find the restrictions placed upon Explorer bags tough enough that I'm constantly deliberating over what and what not I should pack. If you fill your bags, you can't loot but if you don't bring enough resources, you'll get KO'd and lose everything.
Aww shucks! I'm glad the ladies see Ebon as more than just a sexy stud. He does care about his team and feels bad that they've been left behind after the success of their cohorts from Wigglytuff's Guild.
There's a lot of Big Mac in Ebon. Thankfully he's got more to say than "Eeyup" though.
And not a charging station in sight! Curse you, Lithium Ion!
Palkia could probably help you go back where you're from under his own steam. But then you'd have quite a different problem!
I hope for their sake, the girls are only joking about a Galactic Central Black Hole Multidimensional Express. Once you start involving public transportation, the whole exploration angle to dimension-hopping goes straight out the window and you're left smelling homeless buttcrack until you reach the soul-sucking tedium of your wagey-cage. See you on the flip side, mon ami!
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Part three response. Don't forget to read part 2 below!
Mama mia! Pinkie's amused by a nightmare form of death for many people.
Now I'm stah'vin! Of course, that's a granted when dealing with post-op diets...
You know what Pokémon Mystery Dungeon is missing? A bitchin' load screen. Like right here, this needs a bitchin' good load screen. This should do the trick! This one's from Pokémon Unite -- AKA the game where Glaceon is an overpowered monster who stomps your face.
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Applemancer AJ! This is a concept I can get behind.
Involving our homebrew Equestrian headcanon in this story becomes a lot easier once the action switches to Equestria itself. I'll keep this in mind for later.
I think about this part a lot. Did I go too far? I think the worst part is that we're not given more time to examine the implication of mons eating mons, even though the story focuses on Eevees as cute talking animals. It's a microcosm of the issues of this story's beginnings as a whole, being forced to skim over the Pokémon World to reach Equestria.
Yes and no. The seeds and berries can do the job just fine but they don't exist everywhere due to... well, let's just say this will all get explained later.
Glaceon is most often associated with dogs in fan art. As has been commented on in chapter 3 -- I think... -- Eeveelutions are more likely to associate with cats, dogs, or foxes based on their personality and appearance. It's a way to create variations within kinds and make them more interesting than the cookie-cutter designs from the games. So you can have smaller more catlike Glaceons running around like Yumi from Blackravebow's laudible Youtube series, Pokémon Mystery Dungeon Rescue RPG who are the size of an Eevee.
Glassie is unremarkable in appearance. She's the size of a medium-sized dog and similar in appearance to the game model.
Ebon purrs like a cat but looks like your typical foxlike Umbreon. He also has your typical canid knot.
Espeon is the quintessential small, timid kitty with ears as large in proportion as you'd expect from an AJ Aficionado fic. She's the only female of the group with feline anatomy.
Edelweiss is built like a brick shithouse, just like her dear brother. She has a canine spade like Glassie.
None of them are shiny forms.
Sidenote: Edelweiss loves meat, especially her brothers! But I figure like any good venus flytrap, a meaty meal goes a long way.
The Pokédex suggests Umbreon uses its rings to lure unsuspecting prey in before ambushing it. Since the beasts Ebon is hunting are "wild", one could suppose this would work just fine. If you choose to ignore the Pokédex — and no one will blame you if you do, it looks like it was written by an excitable eight-year-old — fan theories abound that there is indeed an "Umbreoff" setting that allows for stealthy night stalking.
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To step into game nerd shit for a moment, Umbreon's attack stats are pretty weak. He's slow and has poor attack and special attack instead relying on endurance to overcome an opponent, slowly tearing an opponent down with toxic and bite while it futilely tries to land a defensive blow against Umbreon's thick hide that offers good protection against physical damage and superb defense against special damage. In the universe of Equestria Mystery Dungeon, far more animalistic rules will apply to the act of killing and Ebon will seek to ambush prey the old-fashioned way and deal a mortal injury early on before his prey can run or counter with something really nasty.
More perverted-minded Pokéficionados (I just coined that, tyvm) headcanon a much less lethal tip to the spiky hairs around Jolteon's ass for the purposes of lovemaking but I dunno; that still looks like an unpleasant time to me.
He'll get his chance, if only because I never really liked having him play coy about fucking his sister anyway or how I handled it in this story.
Introduced in generation 8. Yet another anachronism in this story. Honestly, would anyone care if I just ditched the pretense of this Mystery Dungeon story being confined to PMD Darkness?
In the spirit of your Turnabout Storm Novelization, Sensei, I think there should be a post-story chapter dedicated to Ebon getting drunk off his ass!
Glassie likes to save time.
He's just trying not to lose his job! HR is a bitch when it comes to this sort of thing! Joke starts at 19:56.
Now you know why they say Ebon has a big heart!
Wingglaceon! I dig it!
I want to give this MASSIVE comment of yours the justice it deserves so I'm going to split my part 3 reply into two parts. Man... you really went all out for me!
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Finishing my reply from yesterday.
I could say the same thing about Glassie. I wish I could go more into her character but she needs to evolve naturally over the course of the story. I want to point out that the Glassie in this story is basically the one in Snow Cave and that gal has a lot of issues. I like to think Sike needs to be more like Glassie and Glassie needs to be more like Sike.
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The line from Denim_Blue about the baseline of mine and your characters having two settings -- horny and half-horny -- comes to mind.
Has everybody heard about the herd? Well everyone knows it's about the herd.
I want a herd, herd. Herd herd's the word. I wanna...
Friends with treasures!
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Consider it done!
Angel Bunny won't be pleased when they all learn 'tackle'.
The little monster might finally have some competition! And I don't just mean in ear length.
Introducing them to the woods to help manage the deer population would be beneficial. Seeing one dead on the side of the road after being hit by a car, not so much.
It's okay as long as you obey the Prime Directive.
Never leave the universe without it!
Aww! The bad girl has a soft side!
Yet another anachronistic Pokémon. At least I spelled Zeraora correctly. Generation 7: Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon.
Ebon is a perfectly normal guy and I will insist this is true for as long as I live. And Glassie is probably the best character I've ever written. Really proud of her.
This is such an obvious case of the author speaking through his characters, that I have to laugh. Sylveon is cute (and also anachronistic in this story being a Gen 6 Pokémon) but there's something kind of alarming about its presence, you know? It's like looking at Pinkie Pie with her hair flat except Pinkamena also has fangs that can tear your throat out.
This is not technically true but a cute nod to the fact that Fairy typing acts as a counter to Dark typing, which was considered to be overpowered in its day. Sylveon is a special-attack user and Umbreon's special defense offers it excellent protection to all such attacks -- even those that deal super effective damage. You want to know who Umbreon's true nemesis is? Fucking Heracross. One of the fastest Pokémon of all time where Umbreon is famously slow and deals powerful, super effective physical blows with STAB-boosted bug and fighting moves. Chances are Umbreon will get pulverized before you even think about recalling it from the battlefield.
That said, Sylveon does indeed have a very strong advantage over Umbreon and can even dismantle Umbreon's greatest nemesis -- fighter types -- with ease.
Fear the moon rabbit!
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Sylveon's ribbons are charming as hell, no? Pinkie would love Sylveon most of all. Both of them are super cute and also potentially dangerous.
Sylveon and consent are like oil and water, sadly.
Five Nights at Sylvies and on all five nights I took ribbons up the bum.
Depends on the meta. They are absolutely OP in Arceus: Legends where they can slap on Calm Mind and trivialize their anemic attack stats. But their meta on the battlefield is a bit more... mixed. Admittedly, he's done well for himself, overall and never became outright bad in any tier.
Freud would have a field day!
Arceus helps those who help themselves! And Glassie loves to help herself.
Eat your sister out while you're at it.
DB'd in the commentverse. Eyyyy!
I want to see Rarity with a forehead gem now!
Dayyyyyyyum girl!
God, that would be hot as fuck.
Man, the Girls are really getting off on their own fantasies here! I'm learning as much about them here as I am reading Unleash the Magic!
Stay as long as you'd like, girls! It's been a blast watching your explore your sexual peculiarities... and mine!
Amazing stuff, Sensei! Thank you. And I hope my replies recompense you in some way for your monumental effort. Thank you!