• Published 26th Feb 2021
  • 1,343 Views, 52 Comments

Mann Vs Mane - dudenotactive



For a thousand years the two sisters would fight over the silliest of things, and for a thousand years, that is how it always been. Now a new threat had invaded Equestria and it's up to the mercs to save their careers.

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Two Sides, One Goal

"So..." Rarity began as she and her friends gathered around a table. "What in Equestria even happened?"

"They came out of nowhere!" Dash slammed her hooves against the table, she was displeased by the results of the previous match. Everyone shared her emotion. They felt as if it was unfair, to begin with. It happened so fast, and they came at them like a freight train.


Fluttershy sighed deeply, she peered through the scope scanning for any signs of the Blues. It had been a few hours since the match started, and the wagon was nearing the base. Soon, a battle would break out on the final point. Then she'd have to... kill her friends. It was the thought that hurts, unlike the rest, she didn't like taking another pony's life. She knows that it is her duty, but she only wished that she didn't have to.

"Fluttershy!"

The pegasus whipped around with her machete, only to realize that it was Spike who called her name and it came from the radio. He was just checking in on her, nothing out of the ordinary.

"H-hello..." She answered back.

"We're gonna defend the final point! It's up to you to pick them off, Fluttershy!" Spike said.

"Okay, I'll do my best..."

"That's the spirit! Twilight is counting on me to keep the bomb away from the castle and she's counting on us Red team. Over and out!"

"Must we always come to blows darling?" Fluttershy tensed up, she glanced over back at the window to find Rarity right next to Fluttershy's rifle. The unicorn was just there, sitting on the windowsill with a lit cigarette. She usually used her pipe rather than smoking with the filter on her lips. Said something about how it easily smudges her lipstick.

"Rarity..." Fluttershy greeted her foe.

"Fluttershy, how are you today?"

"I'm fine. How's your team?"

"As expected, Twilight is reluctant to do her job. But princess Luna is paying her a total of eight manticore kidneys. So do expect another trip to the surgery table dearie." Fluttershy shuddered at the thought of the operation light glaring at her. Sometimes she questioned Twilight's sanity. But just like the rest, she was just another pea in the pod.

"How about Pinkie, is she having fun?" Fluttershy asked.

"More than ever, she always wanted to blow up that castle ever since she laid eyes on it. Oh, how is Spike? I had stabbed him right on the back and I'm sure he was very upset."

"He seems fine. Spike is serious about defending the castle." She said as she took a seat on the floor facing Rarity.

"Right... So how do you want to end this darling?"

Fluttershy's left ear flicked once, a terrifying force loomed over her. She could hear the heavy breathing from behind. The pegasus dared not turn, or else she would scare herself to death. But somehow, Fluttershy had found the courage to stand back and glare at the second intruder of Fluttershy's safe spot.

There stood a mare who wore a gas mask and black sleek boots. She was what the rest had learned was called a kirin. It was evident with the scales on her back and the horn on her head. Every team across Equestria has a pyro, but none seem to be as detached from reality as team HM's/Harmony's. This mare was called Autumn Blaze, a random kirin that had just walked into their base one day and asserted itself into the group. Funny thing is, they were hiring pyros at the time.

Fluttershy stared down the nozzle of Autumn Blaze's flamethrower. The stench of gasoline was strong. The pyro said something, but the words were only muffled noises, the only thing Fluttershy could tell was that she sounded cheerful.

"We can do this any way you like darling, but I do suggest my knife over burning to death." Rarity was practically making the decision already. It was better to die quickly than be in a ball of blazing fire.

But there was another choice, Fluttershy unsheathed her machete and pointed it at Rarity. "T-Twilight is counting on me! Spike needs m-my help! I won't d-die here!" Her grip around the handle was loose, she shook on the spot fearful for her life.

"Courage always fitted you so well Fluttershy," Rarity smirked as she tossed the cigarette aside. She brandished her butterfly knife, clean and sharp, just like how she dressed.

The two mares began to circle each other while Autumn only watched with glee. It was a duel between rival assassins, two professionals who were talented in their crafts. Their eyes locked onto each other and dared one to make a move. Spies were deceptive, so Fluttershy needed to be wary of any feints or slips. It would be a devastating blow if Fluttershy makes a mistake now.

Then, after a split second, both mares lunged at each other with their blades. But just as they were about to connect steel, something unpredictable happened.

"You are now in the Red team! Do not fail." A woman's voice was broadcast through Rarity's mind. The same words had reached Autumn's mind and even she was surprised.

"What!?" Rarity exclaimed.

Even Fluttershy was shocked to see her turn red. Now that she noticed it, Autumn Blaze was on her side as well. "Auto balance?" Fluttershy asked sheepishly.

"How!? There are only nine of us!"

"Hmmph!" Autumn muffled something.

"Fluttershy!" Spike's voice called out from the radio. "We got trouble!"

Rarity swiped the radio before Fluttershy could even get it. "Spike, this is Rarity, Autumn and I have been auto balanced to the Red team. What is going on out there!"

"Blue team got replaced by a different mercenary group! And I- sweet mother of Discord!" There was an explosion that came from the wagon, but it was too small for it to be the bomb. And then it began, guns and bombs started to go off in the distance. "I need help quickly!"

"You've just been liberated! You are now an American citizen, do not resist!" That was the last thing they heard before an explosion was set off again, this time it came from the castle.

"We need to head for the castle now! Autumn, you're with me. Fluttershy, you take the scenic route and take out any mercenaries you find! This has VN team written all over it, those ruffians will pay for stealing our jobs!" With that, the mares jumped into action.

Rarity and Autumn Blaze exited the building as fast as possible and made their way towards the Red base. As for Fluttershy, she took the longer route. She needed the element of surprise if she were to do something for the team, it was about time she started doing her job.

Fluttershy went alley to alley, making sure that she wouldn't get spotted by the enemy. Luckily the ones that did notice her were the ponies of Ponyville and the students of the Friendship School who greeted her as she snuck by them. And just as she reached the second to the last point, there she discovered something terrible. It was the rest of the former Blue team, Pinkie, Twilight, and Dash. All were nursing their wounds and bruises. Twilight was working hard as ever with her Medi Gun.

"Everyone!" Fluttershy called out as she rushed to their side. "What happened?"

"We got jumped, that's what happened! We barely had time to react, much less survive!" Dash said sourly, clearly, she was peeved off by the fact that the wagon got stolen.

"She's right," Twilight said. "they came out of nowhere and we were caught off guard. Especially when we were still registering what had happened with the auto-balance."

"Those darn changelings are to blame, I am sure of it!" Pinkie expressed her anger. "I knew we should've toasted their sourdough from when we had the chance!"

Fluttershy looked at Pinkie quizzically. "What do you mean, who did this? The VN team? BG Alpha? The Pillars?"

"They wouldn't just steal our jobs like that, we mercenaries have rules when it comes to this," Twilight told her something else. The alicorn stared towards the direction of her castle, a curious shine flashed in her eyes as an idea popped into her mind. "No, they weren't even ponies to begin with. I... I wish to meet these creatures..."


"Brace yourselves!" Spike warned his friends as missiles rained down up the castle. "Where is everyone!? We can't take them on like this!" Just then he heard the dreadful noise of a spy decloaking. He snapped around with his wrench, only to come face to face with the end of a revolver. And just when he had dealt with the Soldier.

"You are the Engineer?" The tall man scoffed. "You are quite short and young."

"Who are you!?" Spike demanded to know.

"Classified. But to put it bluntly, we are the men who will end your careers." He pulled back the hammer, Spike was helpless with no way to escape.

Only a miracle could save him now. And that miracle came as a righteous piece of lead that dug into the man's shoulder, his revolver went off course and shot the ground instead. He grunted in pain, his eyes went towards the source to find Fluttershy on top of a nearby building who was accompanied by Pinkie.

"Merde." He cursed just as a bullet went through his skull.

As the body collapsed, Spike couldn't help but hear the set of footsteps growing ever so silent. The Spy was still alive.

Spike made sure to thank Fluttershy before attending to his sentry. This was only the beginning, the Spy will come back and strike when Spike least expects it. But for now, he needed to strengthen the defenses.

Meanwhile, Twilight and Dash were making their way to the castle. A gleeful smile plastered on Twilight's face as the two passed by a man with a rifle, he must be the Sniper of the group. Never had she before seen such a creature. They stood on two feet, almost hairless, thus needing to wear clothes to keep warm. And interestingly enough, they had claws instead of hooves or paws. She grew a fascination for these appendages and wished that she could bring home a few samples.

But sadly she had no time, Twilight needed to get to her castle as soon as possible.

"Comin' through!" A scrawny man tackled Rainbow Dash aside, severing the red beam of Twilight's Medi Gun. Twilight recognized quickly that this was the Scout, he was certainly short, lightweight. It was just plain obvious because of his appearance. And this merc had pinned Dash under him with his stock shotgun right at her face. "Sorry girly, but ya ain't be leaving anytime soon!"

"Get off me or else I punch your teeth out!" Dash threatened.

"Ooh, I'm scared! Listen, I'm just being friendly and helping you get to Red base quicker. Just hold still and eat lead."

Twilight could save Dash, she had uber and they could easily turn this fight around. But just as she connected the beam, Twilight felt a chill run down her back. She caught a glance of a Pyro looming over her who held his axe over his head, and the worst part, it was a Third Degree. As the axe came down, Twilight activated the uber charge, just in time too.

"Uh oh," Scout said before he got decked right in the kisser by an ubered Rainbow Dash.

"Twilight, come on!" Dash sprang up to her hooves and ran. Twilight said nothing and simply followed.

"Mmphn, mmphma!" The Pyro cried out earning the attention of Sniper.

"I see 'em!" Sniper trained his scope on Twilight, he waited for the uber to end so he could plant a bullet. His trigger finger flexed, a deafening bang erupted. Then silence.


"Bang..." Twilight said with a hoof pointed at her own head. Her friends around the table stared at her oddly, which must be because of the crazed grin on her face. She seems so happy, most wouldn't like recalling their deaths, not her though. Twilight cherished her death and she learned from them. "Snipers are efficient mercs, that we know. But I noticed something when I was still amidst my respawn."

"What?" They all asked.

"Their techniques, their style. It's almost identical... to ours." She explained, earning her a few quizzical looks from her team.

"What do you mean?" Spike questioned.


"Gah!" Spike hid behind his sentry as a Soldier blasted his machine with his shotgun. Spike was unable to save the sentry as it was broken beyond repair.

"Sentry down! Oorah!" He holstered his shotgun away and brought out his rocket launcher and used it to retreat from Spike. This was the third time the Soldier came after his sentry.

"Oh come on!" Spike cried out his frustrations as his sentry blew up.

The door behind him suddenly opened and out came Twilight with a Crusader's Crossbow in her hooves. And with it, she rushed over to the balustrade and aimed, thanks to the design of the weapon she was able to heal Fluttershy from the distance. She then turned towards Spike with her Medi Gun and started healing his injuries.

"Spike, status report." She said.

"They aren't any species I know of, but they still have the same classes as us. Nine mercenaries of unknown origin. Big Mac is at the front defending the last point with Applejack. Dash just got here, she's still recovering from a few bruises, she got jumped by their Heavy. Rarity is doing her best to sap any sentries, and our pyro is making sure no spies get near them. The only issue is, he's here instead of the front lines." He reported to Twilight.

And just like he said, the team were at the front door defending with all they've got. It was a literal war zone, empty shells littered the ground, small craters were all over Twilight's lawn, and worse of all, the wagon was right at her doors. All they needed to do was give it a hard push, then boom, the castle is gone.

"I see, and I believe that Soldier is destroying your sentries?"

"He keeps coming back, I tried to fight him off but he just breaks my stuff!" Spike said.

"I'm gonna send Autumn over, she'll keep that Soldier off. But that'll open an opportunity for the Spy." With her wings outstretched, Twilight hopped over the railing and glided over towards her team.

"Twilight!" Applejack couldn't be happier. Even the rest of the team spared a moment to greet her.

"Autumn, Spike needs you up on the balcony!" Autumn nodded before going inside the castle. Twilight turned towards the rest. "We have five minutes on the clock! If our contracts end, so will theirs!"

"You heard her," Applejack grinned, her grenade launcher was fully loaded and she was ready to light the fuse. "Let's show them how we do things around 'ere!"

With a battle roar that could be compared with a tiger's, the Red team stood their ground. Bullet after bullet, bombs after bombs. Both sides fought relentlessly, and both showed no sign of stopping. Just like any day back in Teufort, the casualties were high. Yet it did not discourage Twilight, she knew that her team would make it back in time to hold off the bomb.

As they did their best, so did the Blue team. There were moments when they nearly touched the wagon but thankfully Applejack would activate her sticky bombs and slow down their progress. Rarity was even able to get rid of their dispenser at the cost of her own life. And Pinkie and Dash being the clever mares they are, used Spike's teleporter to sneak behind them. But they didn't take account of a Pyro camping the exit.

It was moments like these when you would truly feel the thrill of combat. When something important is on the line and you know that it was up to the whole team to win the game. So they fought, their surroundings were covered in ash and blood, so much that Dash slipped on a few puddles.

"Come on you rotten oaks!" Applejack yelled as she dodged a meat cleaver that was aiming for her head. "Are y'all ponies or are you a bunch of rats!?"

"I'm a dragon!" Spike answered from the balcony. Even Autumn made a muffled noise to object as well.

Twilight ignored them, she was too busy being focused on the enemy. There was only a minute left, and yet, a few members of the Blue team were missing. Her eyes darted around looking for the others, she needed to know their location. Because there were no signs of the Blue Medic and Heavy, not even the Pyro.

"Los los!" And as she feared, their Medic had came out of hiding and activated their uber charge. Both he and the Heavy charged towards the bomb with all they got.

"I am bulletproof!" Heavy roared as he ran.

The ponies quickly trained their weapons at the charging giant and pelted him with a flurry of bullets. Just to slow him down. But this was a fatal mistake, the Blue Demo and Soldier rushed from the left and Dash was the only one to respond. Fluttershy was only able to take out the rival Sniper giving her team a chance to win. It was up to the rest to seal the deal.

Big Mac discarded his Gatling aside, he gritted his teeth and took a stance just in front of the wagon. And when Heavy had collided with the bomb, the whole thing came down to a competition of strength. Both heavies did all they could, but they both proved to be as strong as the other. And this fact alone impressed Heavy, so much that he cracked a smile.

The uber started to run out, everyone could tell, the Red team saw a glimmer of hope. They just needed to last long enough until the Heavy was vulnerable. But just as victory was an arms reach away, the devil himself came to take it away in the form of a Pyro. All eyes widened and their hearts stopped for a second as the Pyro had snuck up to them with his flamethrower. They expected a painful end by the flames of hell, but the Red team was instead pushed off and away from the wagon with a single airblast.

Spike and Autumn could only watch as the Heavy pushed the bomb into the castle, then boom. An explosion rocked the earth, and the building crumbled down.


"And that was it." Spike sighed. "Blue team won, but instead of killing us like usual, they only vanished. As if they weren't even there to begin with."

"I can't believe that even happened!" Dash slammed her hooves against the table once again. "This blows!"

The stench of gunpowder was still present around them along with the crystal remains of Twilight's castle. Spike was covered in ash and soot, his overalls needed cleaning after this. There were still a few things that were on fire, such as Autumn. All in all, the only thing that survived the blast was the Cutie Map. Which they used only on a few occasions.

"There were only a few seconds left..." Fluttershy pointed out. "If only we..."

"Look on the bright side," Applejack said after downing a bottle of apple cider. "at least we won't be visitin' Twilight's surgery room for awhile. Ah was not lookin' forward to replacing mah kidneys just yet."

Twilight stood up and straightened her glasses. "Back to the point. These creatures were quite talented. And their skills are similar to ours. The way the Soldier fought unpredictably just like Pinkie. How their Demo only has one eye and a drunk. Ring any bells?"

"Freaky," Dash commented.

"Perhaps it's a coincidence?" Rarity suggested. "Berry Punch is a drunk like Applejack, and they are both Demomares."

"But what about their Pyro?" Twilight pointed out. "The way he moved, the way he carried himself. It was like looking at another Autumn Blaze."

"Speaking of Autumn, where is she?" Rarity said as she looked around, but no sign of Autumn could be found.

"You mean where is he." Dash chuckled.

"Hilarious." Rarity rolled her eyes with obvious disappointment. The rest mimicked Rarity, leaving Dash to laugh at her own joke alone.

"Am I interrupting something?" Someone spoke up, the group looked over to where the entrance used to be and found-

"Soarin!" Everyone greeted the pegasus as he walked over to the table.

"Guess the Blues got you good, did they?" He said as he looked at what was left of the castle.

"Oh, hey, Soarin!" Dash leaned back in her seat and posed awesomely. "Didn't... Didn't see ya there."

"It was alright, you guys were kinda busy. But I don't have time to talk, I still need to look for the other mercenaries."

"The others, for what?" Rarity asked with her eyes narrowed.

"Princess Celestia is calling everyone in for a meeting at Canterlot castle. You as well. There is something important that she needs to talk about, so get some rest and be there at nine in the morning." Soarin said. Afterward he gave them a short goodbye and went on his way to the other teams in Ponyville.

"Huh," Twilight hummed. "The princess is hosting a meeting with everyone?"

"Probably about those darn invaders!" Pinkie said. "I bet they're threatening our monarchy with their filthy democracy!"

"Maybe." Spike shrugged his shoulders. "We'll get our answers once we get to Canterlot tomorrow."

Twilight nodded in agreement. "Right, so get some sleep everyone, and see you all at the train station."

With that, the group split apart to head home for a well-deserved rest. It had been a long day and they were all sore after the fight. Of course Twilight and Spike needed to crash at AJ's place thanks to the fact they were homeless now. It'll take a while to fix Twilight's castle and a lot of money.

Author's Note:

Random pointless facts.

Ponyville is on the border of both Luna's and Celestia's territories. Though this is true, the ponies of Ponyville still live their lives normally with no change at all. Besides having mercenaries killing each other countless times. And Twilight Castle is indeed the Red base.

Team Harmony:

Twilight Sparkle - Medic
Rainbow Dash - Scout
Rarity - Spy
Pinkie Pie - Soldier
Fluttershy - Sniper
Applejack - Demomare
Big Mac - Heavy
Spike - Engineer
Autumn Blaze - Pyro