2727552 Well they not going to act normal if a creature appears out of no were and becomes basically best buds with Princess and the Mane 6 who are seen as the top people in their country.
Plus to me I wanted to give some chater to the guards give them a soul as to say,it might be a bit oc but the guards like do nothing in the show.
Meh, I didn't like the flashback. It felt too much like a cheat. Maybe if the spell had allowed Celestia to see her actions unfold through Bris eyes. That would likely have lead to the same conclusion.
2837829 Something that bugs me is it feels like the conflict gets resolved far too quickly. Especially given that it comes due to a miscommunication and involves a Diarch of Equestria. Relationships, especially with royalty, gets messy sometimes. It shouldn't be as easy as "Oh, my mistake, let's be friends again." resolution. Trust once lost, is hard to be won again. Plus, given that Celestia could beat him into a bloody pulp if she wanted to, I would think the human protagonist would be wary of the princess, so his interaction with her should be as though he were "walking on eggshells." And pride getting in the way of being able to admit when he/ she is wrong. Fear of unforgiveness, worry about how her subjects now perceive her, etc. So yeah, the whole redemption/ resolution thing is arrived at far too easily. I'm reminded of a saying,
The more one fights for something, the more precious it is to the fighter.
The relationships potential is so much more if they have to struggle for redemption/ resolution, than sunshine and rainbows forgiveness. The relationships could be more deeper, more meaningful, more precious, if they have to fight and struggle to forge and keep those friendships, than a shallow, and easy; "I forgive you, let's be friends," social butterfly-ism. So, yeah, that's how this is reading for me, and something I'd like to see addressed Because not all problems/ issues/ dilemmas should be cleanly or quickly resolved.
2897201 Is piss us Furrys off sure,we have Yiff but Bronys have clopping.
It piss me off I see the Furry vs Bronys ,we should be helping each other,we are all the same,we draw ,write,sing etc. Aka Lion King Art and Fan fiction one of the biggest before FIM was around that wasn't no Anime or Sc fi. Our Eemnys are the same.
He had given up his birth name at his families death, and gave himself a new one, Sin,
Seriously? Who in their right mind would call themself that? Even names like Ravenblood Shadowblade seems SUBTLE in comparison to this. Also, he starts calling himself that because he lost his family...What? Was it because his family was against stupid names like this or was it because he thinks losing his family has grant him Gary Stu status?
1204625 none of my business but harsh much? Meh your opinion I guess. Though I will admit all human x Luna pairing or any Luna pairing for that matter start with said person/pony saying how much they enjoy the night sky. I mean why not have them fear the night and Luna slowly get them over it then later have their friendship blossom into something more? I might do that later, Nah I'll just add my on little touch, it does seem to stsy in Luna's character
Also since you have no problem saying exactly what you feel could you take a look at a story I wrote on fanfiction.net? It's called "Another MLP Love Story". Yeeh the title sucks but I can't seem to come up with a better name, so any suggestions while be met with much appreciation. Heck even if you hate it, it will only help me out in the end for ideas.
2898062 I like you name, may I use it in my fanfiction story "Another MLP Love story" yeah I know not a very creative name buut.....not good with names
3233809 Only because she was directly threatening her entire kingdom. Here we see Celestia trying to kill a guy because he slept with her sister. Seriously?
3258447 Last time I checked wolves AREN'T RED. Also, Chapter 11 is just so freaking stupid. If Luna just tell Shining Armor to fuck off when he started to threaten Sin, he wouldn't be in danger AT ALL.
2687031 Thank you![:yay:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/yay.png)
2727444![:ajbemused:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/ajbemused.png)
2727484 Well you have to be careful on how much science you use with Twilight.
Since you might put people off the story if get to much for them ,but you need to have a mixture.
2727552 Well they not going to act normal if a creature appears out of no were and becomes basically best buds with Princess and the Mane 6 who are seen as the top people in their country.
Plus to me I wanted to give some chater to the guards give them a soul as to say,it might be a bit oc but the guards like do nothing in the show.
2727604 ok
Meh, I didn't like the flashback. It felt too much like a cheat.![:twilightangry2:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/twilightangry2.png)
Maybe if the spell had allowed Celestia to see her actions unfold through Bris eyes. That would likely have lead to the same conclusion.
so short, thats my only complaint, lol.
daaaaw luna blushed![:raritystarry:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/raritystarry.png)
![:pinkiehappy:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/pinkiehappy.png)
![:rainbowkiss:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/rainbowkiss.png)
![:heart:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/heart.png)
![:heart:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/heart.png)
![:heart:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/heart.png)
![:yay:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/yay.png)
2837829 Something that bugs me is it feels like the conflict gets resolved far too quickly. Especially given that it comes due to a miscommunication and involves a Diarch of Equestria. Relationships, especially with royalty, gets messy sometimes. It shouldn't be as easy as "Oh, my mistake, let's be friends again." resolution. Trust once lost, is hard to be won again. Plus, given that Celestia could beat him into a bloody pulp if she wanted to, I would think the human protagonist would be wary of the princess, so his interaction with her should be as though he were "walking on eggshells." And pride getting in the way of being able to admit when he/ she is wrong. Fear of unforgiveness, worry about how her subjects now perceive her, etc. So yeah, the whole redemption/ resolution thing is arrived at far too easily. I'm reminded of a saying,
The relationships potential is so much more if they have to struggle for redemption/ resolution, than sunshine and rainbows forgiveness. The relationships could be more deeper, more meaningful, more precious, if they have to fight and struggle to forge and keep those friendships, than a shallow, and easy; "I forgive you, let's be friends," social butterfly-ism. So, yeah, that's how this is reading for me, and something I'd like to see addressed Because not all problems/ issues/ dilemmas should be cleanly or quickly resolved.
Peace,
AuthorGenesis
2897142 No
This the big think people get messed up with Furry comuilty
Out of 100% about 80% is not yiff
It just trolls whant to brands Furrys as just freak who bang in fur suilts.
2897201 Is piss us Furrys off sure,we have Yiff but Bronys have clopping.
It piss me off I see the Furry vs Bronys ,we should be helping each other,we are all the same,we draw ,write,sing etc.
Aka Lion King Art and Fan fiction one of the biggest before FIM was around that wasn't no Anime or Sc fi.
Our Eemnys are the same.
2896937
O_o well, thanks, never really been complimented on my name before, haha.
you are welcome to use my name anywhere if you run it by me first if you really want :D
2897221I think your enemy is grammar.
I read this a while ago and am pleased that a new chapter is out
2214469
Don't worry people! This creature is apparently trying to communicate with us, our top linguists are already decoding its message.
3217327 cute
Seriously?
Who in their right mind would call themself that? Even names like Ravenblood Shadowblade seems SUBTLE in comparison to this.
Also, he starts calling himself that because he lost his family...What? Was it because his family was against stupid names like this or was it because he thinks losing his family has grant him Gary Stu status?
1204625 none of my business but harsh much? Meh your opinion I guess. Though I will admit all human x Luna pairing or any Luna pairing for that matter start with said person/pony saying how much they enjoy the night sky. I mean why not have them fear the night and Luna slowly get them over it then later have their friendship blossom into something more? I might do that later, Nah I'll just add my on little touch, it does seem to stsy in Luna's character
Also since you have no problem saying exactly what you feel could you take a look at a story I wrote on fanfiction.net? It's called "Another MLP Love Story". Yeeh the title sucks but I can't seem to come up with a better name, so any suggestions while be met with much appreciation. Heck even if you hate it, it will only help me out in the end for ideas.
2898062 I like you name, may I use it in my fanfiction story "Another MLP Love story" yeah I know not a very creative name buut.....not good with names
3232404
:O
Well then, that's one way to guarantee a guy likes and favorites your story :3
3232538 So may I use you name?
3233496 of course!![:pinkiesmile:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/pinkiesmile.png)
3226455 It a nickname he deiced to use since it you take the first 3 letters of his full name it would make Sin.
3227503 Um she tried to killed a certain Queen in the show.
3232395 I think about it maybe you can help with a story of mine I have in the Pipe line.
3233809
Only because she was directly threatening her entire kingdom. Here we see Celestia trying to kill a guy because he slept with her sister. Seriously?
2214469
Whoever drew your cover has never seen a wolf in his entire life.
3239855 Dude what that got to do anything to do with my story?.
I ask the artist ,to draw Dragon is a certain cartoon wolf style,which the artist did.
3258447![:ajbemused:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/ajbemused.png)
Last time I checked wolves AREN'T RED.
Also, Chapter 11 is just so freaking stupid. If Luna just tell Shining Armor to fuck off when he started to threaten Sin, he wouldn't be in danger AT ALL.
When you going to update.
3269791 Last time I check pony's cant talk fly or do magic your point ?.
Dragon is my original oc from a movie fan base which wolfs, are not the "today normal Wolf coulars".
Do you no what wolfs look like 400 years ago.
It called Big brother mode he going to protected his wife and sister,if he she a threat.
3385287 Sorry we get to it by beta very busy at the moment
3439037 Thanks for clearing that up.