Welcome to the neighborhood
Since arriving in Equestria two months prior, Chris had seen all manner of strange and mystical things. In addition to the one-way portal that had dumped him into sugarcube corner in a teleportation trick gone wrong, he had encountered unicorns, pegasi, griffons, magic, and even dragons! But the world was not without its quirks and strange behaviors. Case in point: right now.
"Twilight. Why are you hiding in my cupboard?" Chris arched an eyebrow at one of the most influential ponies in the world, as she tried to make herself scarce behind a teacup. The purple alicorn grinned sheepishly, her body twisted into an awkward position in order to fit
"Um… just inspecting for cracks in the wood! You know how these new houses can be. Gotta make sure everything is in perfect shape!" She shuffled nervously. "Just pretend I'm not here!"
"What about those holes?" He gestured to two suspiciously eyehole-shaped openings in the cupboard door. "They look pretty suspicious to me. Almost like you were spying on me!"
Twilight responded on impulse, years of hearing that line causing a knee-jerk reaction as she adjusted her position in the small space. "It's not spying, it's scientific observation! Oh, wait." Her eye twitched as she realized she had played her hand. "Ponyfeathers," she muttered as she was unceremoniously hoisted out of the cabinet my Chris, who also grabbed her thick binder of observation notes labeled 'Humanus Ginormous morning ritual ' and carried them to the front door.
"Nice try, Sparky. And for the record, it's homo sapien, not humanus ginormous. Now, go home to your fancy crystal castle and write a friendship report about spying on people or whatever. I need to eat my toast before it burns." He set her down gently in front of his door, opening it inwards and gesturing for his unwanted guest to leave. Twilight let out a long, drawn-out sigh before reluctantly trudging outside, the door slamming behind her.
"Glad that's over with." Taking a quick glance at the notes he had forgotten to throw out after the purple princess, Chris felt his eyes widen in shock. "She has my wake-up time?! How? Does she have hiding spots-" he stopped, the realization dawning on him. "...everywhere," he breathed. "Probably two in each room. Welp, there goes my morning…"
Chris quickly ate his toast, then went back to his bedroom, first. It was a fairly spacious room with a very opulent bed in the center, a move-in gift from Celestia since she was the only other creature who needed a bed that size. The sheets and blankets were tossed aside immediately and the mattress carefully lifted up to check underneath. Nothing. Chris also ducked his head behind the dresser, and in the closet, tossing clothes haphazardly to the floor in search of a secret alcove, or recording crystal, anything to indicate he was being spied on by a certain neurotic equine.
"Aha! It's got to be in here!" Chris joyously proclaimed, swinging the door of his second, empty dresser wide open. "Gotcha, Spar...ky?" Instead of finding a hidden princess, Chris found himself staring down the barrel of a loaded party cannon. Attached was a note: 'Happy housewarming, Chrissy buddy! Enjoy your cake and sprinkles, courtesy of your bestest best friend! -Pinkie Pie' It was then that Chris noticed the tripwire that had been attached to the dresser door, and the cannon started rumbling…
"Oh, no…"
After three hours of cleaning up cake batter and glittery sprinkles from the bedroom, and another forty minutes showering off the sticky goop, Chris prepared to head off towards the Castle of Friendship in a huff. If Twilight was going to invade his home, he was going to barge in and demand to know her hiding spots! It'd be easy, hopefully.
Just as he was about to open the door, though, it swung open and hit him in his face, sending Chris staggering backwards in a daze. "Aw yeah! Great to see you got the place settled, C! Nice digs, lotsa room." Without even noticing the occupants, the one and only Rainbow Dash trotted in. She made a beeline for the fridge, grabbing a cider from within, and plopped down on the living room couch, chugging the beverage. "Delicious!" She let out a loud burp before glancing at the human rubbing his head. "Oh there you are, C. Why are you up against the wall?"
"Rainbow, you can't just barge in without permis-"
"HEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRREEEEEEE'SSSSSSS…" the door slammed into Chris again as another small horse entered, along with a rental oom-pah-pah band. "...your welcome to the neighborhood song! We hope you will stay here for a while! So that when your face is long, we can make you smile!" Ever the bundle of energy, Pinkie Pie sang with unbridled joy as she danced and twirled around, somehow throwing streamers and party supplies around in such a way that the room was flawlessly decorated in moments. "This is your welcome to the neighborhood soooooong! It isn't very long!" As quickly as she had appeared, the pink bundle of energy was gone, and the living room now needed cleaning as well.
Rainbow held up her empty cider bottle in a mock toast before tossing it backwards, shattering against the wall. "So my kinda destroyed my cloud house during stunt practice, so I'm crashing here for a while. Cool? Cool. Thanks C, you're awesome."
Chris angripy glared at rainbow. He did owe the girls for helping him get this house, and he was good friends with them, so he didn't have much choice. "Ugh, fine. But you're helping me with cleaning this up-"
"Oh wait I just remembered I got a storm to set up gottagobye!" The pegasus took off like a rocket, the resulting draft sending everything in the room flying into a state of disarray.
"Raaaaiiiiiiiiinnnnbooooowwww! Get back here and help me sweep, you Blue Angel reject! Rrrrgh!" With a scowl, Chris picked up a broom and got to work. It was going to be a long night...
Stats
Page generated in 0.023 seconds
Total duration
1,007 users online
1,796,385 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Sodding ponies...
Geez, I'm gonna feel bad for Chris the longer that this goes on... matter of fact...
How exactly can a loaded Party Cannon fit in a closet?
9950383
……………………… this has my interest…….. but I feel sorry for the dude. I really do.
9950456
Yeah, welcome to that one house in video games that the hero just walks into unannounced.
9950519
yeah. in all the games in every RPG game there is...….. even dragon quest.
just t he right amount of insanity well done
How are they getting in if his door is locked? I mean, RD would've had to literally knock the door of its hinges just to get in.
9950950
I'll probably cover this later, but since Rquestria is such a peaceful, crimeless utopia where bad events are resolved in 30 minutes (including commercials) or less, there's never really been a need to lock your doors... or have locks at all.
In this ponyville, someone knocking at your door arou d midnight isn't some ominous guy coming to kill you. It's most likely Pinkie having a party or something.
Blue angel reject
That's a good one!
9950970
So he didn't even lock his door? I mean, that's how Twilight gotten in without him knowing. Next time, he should lock his door.
9950977
Let me reitierate: the door does not have a lock.
No doors in ponyville aside from the bank vault have locks.
This will be a plot point for a later gag.
9950971
Thanks, I try to be creative.
Seems interesting. Maybe little too much action but I think it makes this story start nicely. Followed.
Seems like it’s time to install locks...and reinforce doors and walls with iron or steel...and figure out anti teleportation wards...and brick up windows. If that sounds stressful take heart in that no matter what you do it won’t stop Pinkie.
Hum, could be an interesting story, hopes he turn into a pony.
9951552
That would just ruin it to be honest
9952732
To be fair it might make for a good one-off chapter involving discord or something.
Hey new story your stuff always makes me laugh well what I've read anyway hows nick doing in canterlot by the way
Hope he renegades on letting dash stay and really lets pinkie have it for how annoying she can be
She is worse with boundaries than practically any other pony
9951002
so he's been here long enough to know how powerful magic can be and hasn't asked the Celestia and Luna to ward his home against intrusion? Because that sets up a hilarious plot where he has his own lesson zero trying to figure out a way to STOP Pinkie from getting in anyways, and a way to stop Twilight from bypassing the wards while having to handle pinkie and/or twilight letting OTHER ponies in as well.