• Published 27th Apr 2019
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The Equestrian Odyssey - A Tale of Two Worlds - Kamahido



Twilight accidently brings a human from Earth to Equestria. Will he be able to coexist with the equine inhabitants of this new land?

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Volume 51 - Chapter 1 - A Place for Everyone

Arc opens his eyes to the dawn sun peeking through the clouds. Turning his head he spies Derpy snuggled up to him. Smiling, he gently pats her cheek.

“Good morning, Derpy.”

She slowly opens her eyes and smiles up at him. “And a very good morning indeed.”

Movement from the other side of Arc is noticed as two hooves gently paw at his back. Derpy giggles as she looks over him.

“It appears we have movement.”

Arc grins as he turns over. “That we do.”

Grabbing the blanket he pulls it back to expose Dinky grinning up at them.

“Hey! You’re letting the warm air out, dad!”

Arc chuckles as he tousles her mane. “Sorry sweetie. But it’s time to get up.”

Derpy nods as she rolls out of bed. “That it is, sweetie. Your first day back to school after the holidays.”

Arc smiles at her. “As well as...”

Dinky groans as she interrupts her father. “Aw... but I want to stay home and help with...!”

Derpy interrupts her daughter. “Now, Dinky... your father can handle this matter himself.”

“Right. After all, I want you to get a good education.”

Dinky sighs. “Okay, dad.”

Hopping off the bed she joins her mother in heading to the bathroom. Arc chuckles as he too gets up.

“She’s eager to help.”

Stepping out of Derpy’s room, Arc turns to his own door. Knocking lightly, he waits. A few moments later Lily opens it and smiles.

“Good morning, Arc.”

“Sleep well?”

“Very! Shelly and I actually just finished dressing.”

Arc smiles. “Guess I came at just the right time then.”

Lily nods as she steps aside. “That you did.”

Entering the room, Arc sees Shelly sitting on the side of the bed. Walking over to her he smiles.

“Hey, Shelly. How are you feeling today?”

Shelly smiles weakly. “A bit tired actually. But I think that might be from me just waking up.”

Lily motions to the closed bathroom door. “We still need to shower, of course. But Shelly and I will wait until Derpy and Dinky finish.”

Arc shrugs. “You shouldn’t have long to wait. They’re pretty quick in the morning.”

Shelly giggles. “I’ve noticed that, yes.”

Arc chuckles. Yes, I suppose you have.

Lily smiles at her friend. “I think you forget that we’ve been here for a couple of weeks now, Arc.”

“That you have. Sorry, but it’s still a bit surreal to me.”

Shelly sighs. “How do you think we feel? After all, it’s not every day that one learns that their oldest friend has actually been fighting for a mythical country on another planet.”

“Understandable, yes.”

The sound of hooves approaching the door rings out. Derpy and Dinky peek inside as Derpy knocks lightly with a hoof.

“Hello. Sorry to bother you three, but I wanted to tell you that we’re done in the bathroom.”

Lily nods. “Thank you very much.”

Shelly grins at Derpy. “We appreciate the hospitality.”

“And I’ll head out today to look for a job so that we can repay you.”

Derpy shakes her head. “Oh no, you two are welcome here just as long as you need.”

“I’ll see about finding some way to earn money too.”

Dinky gasps. “But Miss Shelly, you’re still so weak!”

Shelly smiles at her. “While I am a bit tired, I also need to start carrying my own weight.”

“It’s alright, Shelly. I really don’t mind...”

“Please, Lily. I’ve spent my entire adult life being cared for and helped by you, Arc, Frank, and quite a few others. I’d really like to start paying that kindness back, if only in some small way of become self-sufficient.”

“I... can’t actually stop you, of course. But I would rather that you focus on regaining your strength.”

Derpy appears hopeful. “I’m sure Arc has some ideas already.”

“That I do. But why don’t you two get a shower first before we go on our daily walk?”

Shelly nods. “Alright.”

Lily giggles. “See you soon.”

They grab fresh clothes and head for the bathroom as Derpy and Dinky leave for the orphanage. A few minutes later the front door opens and in walks Frank and Max (in his pony form). Arc looks over from his place in front of the fire.

“Glad you two could make it.”

Frank grins. “We wouldn’t miss it.”

Max salutes happily. “Right. Walking with Shelly is the highpoint of my day after all, sir.”

Arc smirks. “Well, this is going to be a special walk.”

Frank nods. “That it is.”

Arc looks to Max. “Is everything ready?”

“Yes sir. Frank and I just came from there.”

Frank offers Arc a ‘thumbs up’. “It’s a go.”

“Perfect.”

He motions to the couch before continuing.

“Why don’t you two have a seat though? After all, it’s going to be a while.”

Nodding, they do as Arc suggests. Max turns to Arc.

“Sir?”

“Yes, Max?”

“Why do mares always take so long in the Bathroom?”

Frank groans as he rolls his eyes. “There isn’t a man alive whom can answer that question, Max.”

Arc chuckles. “Probably no woman either.”

“I’m confused.”

Arc puts a hand to his chin thoughtfully. “Well... when you were a human, what did you do to get cleaned up?”

“Um... shower with soap and shampoo before toweling off, sir.”

Frank nods. “Then what?”

“Dress myself in clean clothes, comb my hair, and put on deodorant.”

Arc smiles. “Anything else?”

“Not that I can think of, sir.”

Frank gestures to the bathroom door. “Well, they have a bit more work to do in there.”

“Like what?”

Arc chuckles. “Let’s run through what it takes for Shelly to get clean.”

He thinks for a moment before speaking again.

“Like you, she has to wash herself with soap and water.”

Max shrugs. “That probably takes about the same amount of time as my body though.”

Frank nods. “Agreed.”

Arc continues. “Next she has to wash her hair. It takes a bit longer to rinse out long hair versus your short hair.”

Frank chimes in. “Then she has to use conditioner.”

“What’s that?”

Arc sighs. “It’s kinda like shampoo inasmuch as you rub it in your hair and scalp. Think of it kinda like a second shampooing... sort of”

Frank chuckles. “But it doesn’t rinse out as well.”

“There’s that too.”

“What’s it for though, sir?”

“Moisturizing her hair. You see, long hair takes extra care to keep looking pretty and smelling nice.”

“Okay. But after that she gets out of the shower, right?”

Frank shakes his head. “Not quite.”

“Right. After that she still has to shave.”

Max raises an eyebrow. “But human women don’t have facial hair?”

Frank rubs his knee. “Not usually, no. But they do shave their legs.”

“Not usually every day, mind you. A few times a week though.”

“How do you know that though, sir?”

“Remember, Shelly lived with me for a time before she inherited the restaurant. At one point before Lily joined us at my place Shelly got really sick and couldn’t hardly move. To keep her fever down I showered her numerous times a day in addition to keeping her clean.”

Frank frowns. “How long was she sick for?”

“About a week. She just didn’t have any energy though. By the fifth day she was getting really self-conscious about her legs, so... I shaved them for her.”

“I didn’t know that, Arc.”

Arc shrugs. “It’s not something she often brings up, you know.”

Max looks to Arc. “And that took a long time?”

“Yes. Partially because I didn’t really know what I was doing.”

Frank smirks. “Makes sense, as human men don’t traditionally do that.”

“I also shaved her armpits too. For the same reason, of course.”

“Do human women shave anything else, sir?”

Arc blushes slightly. “Um... one other place, yes.”

“Oh?”

Frank clears his throat. “Between their legs.”

Max raises an eyebrow. “You mean their upper legs?”

“Not... exactly.”

There is a deafening silence which no one immediately tries to break. Eventually Max slowly turns to Arc.

“Did you, uh... shave that for her too?”

Arc shakes his head. “No, Max. It’s a very... personal thing to do. That and I was too afraid of accidently cutting her down there.”

“Then why do they shave that? I mean... mares don’t.”

Frank chuckles. “Part of the reason is because it’s a cultural thing. The other is for hygiene purposes.”

Arc continues. “And considering that they have to be especially careful when shaving it... let’s just say that it pays to take a few extra minutes to be careful and do the job right.”

“I can see how they would need more time now, sir.”

Frank leans back. “Well, there’s still more.”

Arc nods. “Right. After they get out of the shower they still have to towel off AND dry all that hair.”

Max thinks as he speaks. “With a towel?”

Frank shakes his head. “With a blow dryer.”

Arc chuckles. “It’s a... I guess the best way to describe it would be a handgun shaped electric device that sprays hot air out its barrel to speed the drying of hair. Hence the name.”

“And that takes more time, right?”

Frank runs his fingers through his own hair. “To say nothing for the time spent brushing it before, during, and after.”

“Then they have to get dressed too.”

“And women’s clothes aren’t always easy, or quick, to put on.”

“Yeah, I learned that from helping Shelly dress in the past.”

Max puts a hand to his chin thoughtfully. “It all makes sense when you break it down like that, sir.”

“Happy to help, Max.”

Quite some time later (considering the subject matter, of course) Shelly and Lily emerge from the bathroom together. They look to the guys as they stand. Lily is the first to speak.

“Sorry for making you all wait.”

Shelly smiles happily at Max. “We may have gotten a bit carried away though.”

Max puts a hand on her shoulder as he nods. “It’s okay, Shelly. I now understand your struggle.”

“Um... what?”

“It must be very time consuming to shave both legs. To say nothing about your genitals.”

Arc facepalms. “Oh boy.”

Lily raises an eyebrow. “This is... awkward.”

Frank chuckles. “Forgive him, Shelly. Arc and I were just walking Max through what it takes for a woman to bathe.”

“Ah! That makes sense.”

Max nods. “And if there is anything I can do to help with it, you need only to ask.”

Shelly giggles nervously. “I’ll... keep that in mind, Max.”

Lily looks to Arc. “Um... in any case, are we ready to go?”

“Yes, I think we should get a move on.”

Lily fetches Shelly’s wheelchair as Max helps her put on her coat. Taking her arm Max looks to Shelly.

“How strong are you feeling today?”

“Enough to be able to walk into town, I think.”

Lily motions to the wheelchair. “Well, I’ll still follow with your this thing. Just in case, that is.”

Arc walks over. “And I’ll hold your other arm to help stabilize you, Shelly.”

“Thank you, Arc. As slippery as the paths are I think I’ll need the help.”

Frank motions to the wheelchair. “Why don’t you put that in your ring though, Arc. That way Lily won’t have to push it through the snow needlessly.”

“Good idea.”

Lily pushes the wheelchair to Arc whom shrinks it down and places it in his ring. Frank opens the door and the group steps outside. Slowly making their way down the path out front the group begins its walk. Frank turns to Shelly.

“Doctor Knowles says you’re getting stronger by the day.”

Shelly grins. “My energy levels are more pronounced too.”

Lily nods happily. “Yesterday you only took one nap after lunch too.”

Arc smiles at his friend. “Sounds like you’re on the road to recovery, Shelly.”

“It’s going to take some time, of course. But I’m starting to feel positively normal!”

Max nods soberly. “And we’ll be with you on this new journey, Shelly.”

Arc looks to Shelly. “Right. It’s good to know that you and Lily will be staying here in Equestria.”

Shelly shudders. “Considering what happened back on Earth I think we’re safer here.”

Lily shrugs. “That and you and Frank are here anyways.”

“Yes, it’s not like we’re leaving anyone behind. If anything we’re going to be closer than ever.”

Frank looks to Lily. “What about the restaurant though?”

“Shelly and I were talking about that very thing just last night.”

“I’d like to transfer ownership to you, Frank.”

Frank raises an eyebrow. “To me?”

Shelly nods. “You and your boys can use the income to support yourselves and your commune.”

Lily grins. “That and you’ll be a legitimate business too.”

Arc chuckles. “It’ll help convince the rest of the community that you’re trying to work toward something honest.”

“That would be nice, yes.”

Frank turns to Arc before continuing.

“I’m just glad we got that hospital mess figured out back on Earth.”

Max looks to his commanding officer. “How did that go, sir?”

“I went with Frank to the police station to turn himself in.”

Lily shudders. “Marshal Raynor was initially very surprised to hear about our kidnapping report though.”

Frank smirks. “We were even more surprised to hear about a certain official letter he received earlier that day as well.”

Arc nods. “Apparently General Mustang told the marshal that the whole incident from the kidnapping to Frank making a scene at the hospital was all part of a training exercise on exposing security flaws and dealing with unruly visitors.”

Frank grins. “That nurse I accosted disappeared before they could sign a police report as well, so there’s no real victim.”

Lily appears hopeful. “So you’re off the hook?”

Arc shrugs. “Without evidence Marshal Raynor pretty much had to drop the charges as it stood.”

Max frowns. “But why would the general help us like that, sir?”

“I wish I knew.”

Frank sighs. “That whole situation reeks of treachery, Arc.”

Arc looks to Max. “All he wanted was to get Doctor Knowles back down there to help save Shelly. While I was there he tried VERY hard to convince me to let him keep the good doctor though. Even going so far as to try tying Shelly and Lily up into it.”

“Do you think Rieper was in on that though, sir?”

“Maybe. But it sounded to me like he wasn’t too keen on Maria sticking around afterwards.”

Shelly looks down at the ground sadly. “I still can’t believe he’s actually my father. All those appointments and treatment sessions and he never said a word about anything. What he knew about my condition... my mother... or why I was left at the orphanage as a child.”

Lily puts a hand on her friend’s shoulder. “Don’t worry about it too much, Shelly. After all, we’re here for you too.”

Max nods soberly. “And we’ll make sure you’re never alone again.”

Arc grins. “Right.”

Shelly sighs dejectedly. “Thanks everyone. But it’s going to hurt for a while.”

Lily smiles warmly. “I think we need to just stay busy, Shelly. After all, worrying about what your father knew won’t help the situation.”

“That’s why I’d like to get a job too.”

“Pinkie Pie said that I could come on as a part time baker with her and the Cakes. They need some help a few days a week.”

Shelly appears hopeful. “Do they need anyone else?”

Frank frowns. “It’s not a good fit for you, Shelly. Their business is a fast paced one behind the counter. Well, at least as far as Pinkie is concerned.”

Arc smirks. “I spoke to the mayor about what you two could do. She actually had a really interesting idea.”

“Oh?”

“What was it?”

Arc looks straight ahead. “I’ll show you.”

Walking through the town they come to a good sized building near the Town Hall. Max looks to it, confused.

“Paneighra Bread, sir?”

Arc nods. “Yup. They make and sell artisan bread here.”

Frank puts a hand to his chin. “I remember coming here once for a bit of a snack. However I found out that they literally only sold bread.”

Lily shrugs. “Well, there is such a thing as specializing.”

Shelly grins. “Maybe I could ask if they’re hiring. Do you know when they open, Arc?”

“That’s complicated.”

“Oh?”

“You see, the owner of this place was away when Decimus razed the town. However since that time he’s developed some fairly serious medical conditions.”

Max frowns. “So he’s in the hospital, sir?”

“Right. He’s been there pretty much since the town was rebuilt. I sat down with him to see if they needed some kitchen help.”

Shelly appears hopeful. “Oh good! Did they?!”

Arc shakes his head. “Not exactly. However, he really liked to talk so I indulged him.”

Frank smirks. “What did he say?”

“When he originally opened this place his plan was to start with bread and branch off into soups, salads, sandwiches, and even wraps. However before he could implement the expanded menu, the town was burned down.”

Max look the building over. “It appears they did a good job rebuilding though.”

Lily turns to Shelly. “I wonder what he’s planning to do?”

“Perhaps he’d do well to find someone to operate it on his behalf.”

Frank chuckles. “Not sure where he’d find someone though.”

Arc nods. “That’s about what he said. Now then, let’s head inside.”

Lily raises an eyebrow. “Inside?”

Arc pulls a key from his pocket. “He told me I could look around.”

Unlocking the door, Arc pushes it open and holds it so the others can pass. Flicking a switch nearby the lights spring to life. Shelly smiles.

“Everything’s so shiny and new!”

Lily turns to Arc. “How badly was the building burned?”

“It was a total loss. Had to be knocked down and rebuilt from the ground up.”

Frank nods approvingly. “Looks like they did a good job though.”

Max puts his front hooves on the counter to look over it. “Agreed.”

Arc gestures with a wave of his hand. “All new tables, benches, stools, and fixtures.”

Shelly looks to a pair of swinging doors. “What about the back?”

Arc smiles at her curiosity. “Let’s take a look.”

They help Shelly behind the counter and into the kitchen. She looks around, clearly impressed.

“Very nice!”

Lily giggles. “Everything’s still all shiny back here too!”

Max: <chuckles.> Well, I’m assuming it’s never been used before.

Arc nods. “Right. Hard Hat and his crews installed everything as per what was here before the fire.”

Frank sits down on a laughably-sized stool. “The only problem here is that it’s all pony-sized.”

Shelly sighs. “A bit short for us.”

Lily turns to Arc. “If he has other employees we could help manage it though.”

“Well, that’s the other problem. All of them accepted other jobs when they found out he couldn’t open this place.”

Max appears hopeful. “Any chance of getting them back, sir?”

Arc shakes his head. “They moved to other towns already, so I’d say that a hard ‘no’, Max.”

Lily puts a hand on a prep station. “We’d like to help, Arc. Really we would. But I don’t see Shelly and I being able to work with such small equipment.”

Shelly groans. “Yes, our backs would be killing us after just a few hours.”

Frank chuckles. “Arc’s not done telling you the best part though.”

“Right. When I explained Shelly’s situation to the owner, he became very emotional. Apparently his wife had died a number of years ago. They’d never been able to have foals, but really wanted to. He offered to sell the building and all the equipment to you at a more than reasonable price to help you get started here in Equestria.”

Lily gasps. “That’s very nice of him!”

Shelly sighs. “But I doubt they take our currency.”

Frank nods. “Right. This land uses ‘bits’.”

Max turns to his commanding officer. “Did you mention that to him, sir?”

“No. Just that I’d run it by Shelly and Lily before getting back to him.”

Shelly shrugs. “Well, as nice a building as it is I don’t think it’s in our price range, Arc.”

“Oh believe me, it is.”

Lily bows her head. “But we don’t have any...”

Arc interrupts her. “I do.”

“He’s right, you know. The commander’s vault back at the base is full to bursting with bits.”

“Right. And I’d like to use them to buy this place for you two.”

Shelly gasps. “What?!”

Lily’s eyes grow wide. “You can’t be serious, Arc!”

“Oh, but I am.”

Max motions with a hoof. “Tell them about your idea regarding the machinery, sir?”

“I’ve already talked to Steel Hammer and Silver Hammer. They’re recovered enough to work again and can custom build whatever machines, in whatever sizes, that you need.”

Frank nods. “They do very good work I’m told.”

Shelly frowns. “But that would cost a fortune!”

Lily looks around fondly. “To say nothing for the cost of the business itself!”

Arc shrugs. “Believe me when I say that I can afford it. That is... if you two are interested.

Shelly puts a hand to her chin thoughtfully. “Well... I would like to keep working with Lily.”

“And I’d like to be close to my friend.”

Frank smiles. “I’d help you get set up here.”

Max raises a hoof. “As would I.”

Shelly giggles. “I... think I’d like to give it a try.”

Lily claps her hands excitedly. “Then it’s settled?!”

Arc nods. “Sounds like it.”

Shelly looks over a stack of menus. “But it’ll be awhile before we could open. Lots of business hurdles to overcome.”

Lily counts on her fingers as she speaks. “Business licenses, bank loans, savings accounts, tax forms, suppliers, machinery, menu items, printing, etcetera.”

Frank chuckles. “Well, since Arc’s giving you the money there won’t be a loan approval process.”

Shelly looks to Arc. “What about acquiring the building?”

“Like I said, I could buy it for you.”

“But we can’t ask you to put up that much money, Arc!”

Lily looks to Shelly. “We could pay him back a little at a time.”

Arc smiles at his friends. “Right. No rush there though. And I’d be willing to pay for the needed machinery too.”

Max puts a hoof to his chin. “That gets the building and the ability to cook food, sir. What about raw ingredients though?”

“Pinkie told me that the Cakes could put you in touch with their suppliers for flour, sugar, salt, and whatever else you need.”

“How about things like buns and bread though?”

“She said things like that would have to be made by you two, as no one in the area makes them for wholesale distribution.”

Arc gestures to a machine in the corner before continuing.

“However, Pinkie already looked this place over with me. She said that this thing could be slightly retooled to make buns, rolls, or whatever you’re used to buying from vendors back on Earth.”

Frank looks at the refrigerator. “How about milk and eggs?”

Max turns to his commanding officer. “The base used to buy those from Sweet Apple Acres, sir.”

“Right. There are a few other farms out there that carry various other produce as well. For example, there’s a large carrot farm next door to Applejack’s place. And on the other side of that is a lettuce farm.”

Lily raises an eyebrow. “A farm dedicated to just one vegetable?”

Frank shrugs. “They like to specialize here in Equestria.”

Max nods. “You’ll probably have to adapt a large portion of your lunch menu to accommodate pony’s diets naturally. But there are some large farms to the south around Appleloosa that we buy produce from in the colder months.”

Arc smiles. “I’ll ask Pinkie and Applejack to help coach you on how business supplies work around here too.”

Lily grins. “That does sound nice.”

Shelly looks back toward the door. “Well, if we’re really going to do this then I’d better head over to the Town Hall to see the mayor.”

Max smirks. “What for, Shelly?”

“A license to do business here, for starters. If it’s anything like back on Earth there’s a lot of paperwork to do.”

Arc nods. “Normally, yes. However most of it is to make sure you can handle a business of this size. I’ve already vouched for you to Mayor Mare and told her that I’ll be putting up the financing to get this place up and running.”

Frank chuckles. “That was fast.”

Max grins. “Anything left to do on our side, sir?”

“The mayor said she’d get to work on the one form still needed. And all it requires is a single signature along with the name of your business.”

Lily gasps. “Right! What will we call it?!”

Shelly turns to her friend with a smiles. “Anything you want, Lily.”

“Me?”

“Yes. You picked out the perfect name for the other place. So you should be able to do the same here.”

“Well, um... this might sound a bit strange then, but... might we call this new restaurant... ‘Shelly’s Kitchen’ as well?”

Frank laughs. “You could run it as a franchise.”

Max appears confused. “A what?”

Arc puts a hand to his chin. “I’d have to check with the registry in Canterlot to be sure there isn’t another business with the same name. But it’s not likely one exists.”

Shelly claps her hands happily. “Then ‘Shelly’s Kitchen’ it is!”

Max heads for the phone on the wall. “I’ll call Hammer and ask her to get that ball rolling as soon as possible, sir.”

“Good. And I’ll notify the Hammer’s to meet with Shelly and Lily regarding...”

His earring chirps. Frowning, Arc touches it.

“Arc here.”

“This is Luna! We have a bit of a situation here in Canterlot, Arc!”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“Thank you! Luna out!”

He severs the connection and turns back to the others.

“Back to work for me.”

Max salutes soberly. “Shall I come with you, sir?”

“Not right now. At the moment you should stay with Shelly.”

Lily gasps. “But isn’t he part of your squad, Arc?”

“I’ll call for them if the situation warrants it. In the meantime Frank and Max will help you get started. Get the Hammer’s here as soon as possible and tell them to bill me for whatever time and materials they need.”

Max nods. “Yes sir. Anything else?”

“One last thing. Tell them to spare no expense. I want everything made PERFECTLY.”

Max nods as Arc calls forth his gauntlet, opens a portal, and heads through it. He turns to the others as it closes.

“Well... shall we get started?”

Lily sighs. “I suppose we should. But what do you think that was all about?”

Max shrugs. “No way to know. The princesses call for the commander for any number of matters.”

Frank nods soberly. “Indeed. But she sounded very... excited.”

Shelly appears hopeful. “So it might be good news?”

Max sighs as he and Frank help Shelly toward the door. “We can only hope.”

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