23. Soaring Regrets
The sun poured menacingly through an open window, hitting me right in the eyes. My vision was blurry, my head was pounding, and I was cold. I stretched a hoof out trying to close the shades, but they were too far away.
Where was I? The room looked familiar somehow, but I couldn’t see straight and it was upside down. No, that was me. I was on my back with my head hanging off a bed.
Opposite from where I was looking, I heard a door open and hoofsteps approaching.
“Are you awake?” a familiar voice asked.
I lifted my head and immediately regretted it. The dull pounding quickly turned into an explosion of pain that further blurred my vision. “Owww! Yes. Oww,” I whispered.
“Easy there, you were really drunk last night,” the voice said again. It was masculine and nice.
My vision cleared up enough for me to realize it was Soarin. He was sitting on the edge of the bed and looking at me with concern.
There was a glass of water in his hoof, which he offered me. “Drink this, you’re dehydrated.”
I drew in the magic around me and focused it on a levitation spell. That immediately failed and sent another wave of pain through my head. “Oww!” I then thrust out a hoof at the glass and missed. It instead landed on Soarin’s foreleg.
“Okay, let me help you,” he said softly before setting one hoof under my head to lift it slowly. He then helped me drink.
I drained the whole glass like I’d never had water before in my life. “How did I get here?” I asked, realizing even in the stupor I was in that this was a very odd and unlikely place for me to be.
Soarin cleared his throat. “That is a funny story. Well, it‘s funny to me. It wasn’t funny last night and there may or may not be a reprimand coming your way. We’ll see.”
Reprimand? What was he talking about? “Wha?”
The stallion got up, refilled the water from a pitcher, and returned. “Take these and then drink this,” he said, setting two little pills on my lips.
I opened my mouth, captured the pills with my tongue, and he helped me wash them down.
“You were drunk,” he started.
“’member that.”
“And the shield spell went off.”
What shield spell? “No clue.”
“And like a good royal guard, you went to report in. You got confused and instead of going to the palace, you went to Central Command. Drunk,” he went on before patting my hoof.
Had I done that? That did sound vaguely familiar. Or at least believable. “Okay,” I replied. Me going to the wrong place wasn’t that funny.
“Well, when you got there, you evidently were stopped at the gate but were quite insistent that it was your duty to check in. A major appreciated your dedication and pulled you away to try and sober you up. Now this is a second hoof account, but evidently you didn’t take kindly to his help, bit him just above the hoofguard, and ran off into the courtyard.”
“Huh?”
“Logically at that point he was miffed and felt you would be better off just spending the night in the pokey until you sobered up. He sent four guards after you. That was around the time I arrived to check in.”
None of this was clicking. The last thing I remembered was drinking with Dolly, Trixie, and whats-her-name. Madam Amataco. With all the power I had in my body, I rolled over onto my side. The room did too, which forced me to cover my mouth with both hooves.
Soarin quickly grabbed a trash can and set it within my reach. “Easy, easy!”
The wave of nausea passed, and I took a deep breath through my nose. “Okay.”
“You sure?”
I nodded.
“Alright, well, you gave those four quite a fight. They chased you for a while, hoping you’d tire yourself out and just lay down. After it was clear that that wasn’t going to happen, they got serious. Unfortunately, so did you.
“You galloped across the yard, leapt over some hedges, tore through the dining facility, jumped out an open window, and then rushed the gate guards from the inside. They were not prepared for that.”
“I’m amazing,” I wheezed.
“No kidding. Luckily, some time while you were in the dining facility, they’d released everypony and issued the all clear, so there wasn’t much of a crowd. I spotted you when you were making your grand escape.”
So I’d gotten away with it!
“You’d have gotten away cleanly if you hadn’t been screaming that you were Lieutenant Day and they needed to respect you.”
“Oops.” I should have been more worried, but my head hurt.
“Yeah, big oops. Anyway, I told the major I’d catch you and take care of you. At that point you were already outside the gates and he was done. So I swooped down, picked you up, and flew you home,” he explained.
“I didn’t fight you too?”
He shook his head. “Not at all. You screamed ‘wheeeee’ and that I was the best stallion in the world—which I did appreciate.”
That sounded like me. I blinked and then looked around. “Wait, this isn’t my home.”
Soarin nodded. “Right. When I got you home, you didn’t know how to unlock your door. Also, even from outside, I could hear somepony screaming, ‘Yes, Bee, yes, Bee, yes, Bee,’ over and over, so I was concerned you’d moved and didn’t want to deal with whatever was going on inside.”
I’d told Trixie she was loud in bed! “That’s my roommate, Trixie.”
“Oh, well… At that point I wasn’t comfortable just leaving you there. You were really drunk, so I brought you here. When we got in, you tried to seduce me, tripped over a floor pillow, and face planted into my carpet. So, I carried you in and put you to bed. Now we’re here.”
He was so sweet. I reached out a hoof and set it on his. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s alright, you’d do the same for me if I ever managed to get as drunk as that. Not that I’m sure I could."
I shook my head, and I hoped he understood how hard that was. “No, not for that. I mean, yes that, too, but for before. I acted like a complete idiot and I’m sorry. You are a classy stallion. I did that to you and you still took care of me.”
Soarin idly rubbed the back of his neck with a hoof. “Well, I really like you and you were bad off.”
“I don’t want to stop seeing you,” I thought. Soarin blinked at me in surprise and I realized that no, I had blurted that out loud.
“Well, things are complicated now. I don’t want to stop either, but I’m also not really excited about just being whatever it is I am now.”
“Fair,” I muttered while my alcohol-addled brain tried to work right. “I’ll stop seeing other stallions,” was what it came up with.
His brow arched. “And that is better?”
My hoof flailed at his. “I’m trying! I’m making a commitment. No other stallions, just you and mares. I’ll give up zebras, too.”
“You’re still drunk,” he said, patting my flailing hoof.
My head shook again, almost blinding me with pain. “No, I’m sober enough. No other stallions and if I’m seriously dating a mare, I’ll tell you.”
He paused and shrugged. “Like I said, things are complicated now.”
I poked at him with a hoof, missing. “Listen, listen. How much are you going to travel when you make it to the Kingdom Wonderbolts? Half the year? More?”
That sudden change of topic clearly had him confused. “Probably more than half. Why?”
“Okay, follow me. We’re married. You’re going to be all over Equestria without me. I’m not giving up my career for you, no offense.”
He looked more confused than ever. “Sunny, what in the world are you talking about?”
“Hyoh… hyno… hypothetically. You’re at a show, some hot little mare wants you, and then what?” I asked before doing my best Soarin voice, “Sorry, my wife is back home and even though we’re only together a third of the year and the only hoof that has touched me in months is my own, I’m turning down this awesome potential experience.”
Soarin blinked at me, then started to relax as he nodded. “I think I’m following?”
I propped myself up on a hoof so I could look him in the eyes. “I’m not going to get mad if you roll around with that mare. I don’t want you to feel guilty or have a crisis of conscious about it, either. I just want you to go for it and have fun. I would still know you’d come home to me. Can you put yourself in my shoes and see that? Just for a second?”
His head tilted and he then nodded. “I hadn’t thought about it that way. I’ll concede your point at least makes sense.”
Thank you, Princess Celestia! Her advice had come through. “Yes, thank you. We can date seriously, but flings are okay. If one of us wants to date somepony else, we talk about it. Is that enough for you?”
“Can I think about it?”
“Of course! Think all you want,” I said before I felt something hot in my chest. Was that passion? A sudden desire to just be with him alone. Could it be? Could this be lo— I fell over, grabbed the trash can and vomited violently into it.
Soarin nestled in behind me and pulled my mane back. “Yeah, I’m just going to put this conversation on hold for now and we’ll talk about it again when I’m completely sure you’re in your right mind and aren’t about to die.”
Most of my vomiting was painful, dry heaves. When I stopped doing that, Soarin got up, brought me another glass of water, and helped me drink it.
“You really are the best stallion ever,” I murmured before sucking down a second glass.
“I’m just doing what anypony would do for a friend.”
I reached out and smooshed my hoof against his face. “Noooo, I think you liiiike me,” I teased.
Soarin chuckled and took my hoof in his. “Yes, I’ve been saying that for a while now. It is good to see you’re starting to come back to your normal self. Let’s get some more water in you, though. Then maybe some toast. You don’t have duty today, do you?”
“That sounds nice. I’m just going to prop myself up here,” I said before wiggling off the edge of the bed and into the center. Soarin had a nice bed. Certainly, nicer than the average officer of his rank. Being a Wonderbolt came with a lot of perks.
“Duty? Anything? No? I guess it isn’t that important right now. I’ll get you some more water and start on that toast. Do you need the trash can?”
I shook my head. “No, I think I’m done.”
“Okay,” he replied before trotting off.
Soarin’s bedroom had always felt more like a hotel than a home to me. He’d traveled so much in the past that it was barely personalized. There were a few family photos, some medals, and a trophy but that was it.
He was on the Canterlot squad now which meant he was there more often but this was only a stepping stone to the main Wonderbolts. Once that happened he’d barely be here, which had helped me with my point.
My argument had been pretty solid. If we were together we wouldn’t see each other a ton once he was at that place in life. I was as loyal as mares came, but the idea of spending over half the year being celibate just seemed too foreign of a concept. Maybe he’d see that too.
“Alright Sunny, here we go,” he said before trotting back in, carrying a small tray. It had a glass of water with both a lemon and lime wedge in it, a plate of toast piled high, and a single rose in a small vase. He looked so adorable. If he’d been in a maid’s outfit, it would have been perfect.
“Awwww.” It just slipped out.
Soarin’s cheeks turned pink. “Well, I know this isn’t the normal sort of situation for breakfast in bed, but why do anything halfway?”
“Thank you. Really. Thank you so much,” I said as he set the tray down beside me.
With whatever dexterity I had, I captured the water with both hooves and drank it all down, enjoying the citrusy taste. There was also something else. Mint?
“And I’m just going to go refill the pitcher,” he said before leaving to do so.
That gave me time to eat the toast in the least ladylike manner. It would help stabilize my stomach and get rid of the woozy feeling. I crammed each slice down as fast as I could. We were having a moment and I needed to get back to my best face as soon as I could.
When Soarin came back, he blinked. “Did you eat all of that toast.”
“Yesh,” I choked out around the dry bread, then threw my hooves out towards the pitcher.
“I’ve seen you drunk before, but never this drunk, what happened last night?” he asked as he refilled my glass. I drained it immediately and he filled it again.
“Trixie had a big show at the Mare Contraire last night and a talent scout was there. We signed her to a big deal that will get her out touring Equestria. It’s a huge career move for her and it means I won’t have a roommate again.”
“Oh, that is great news on both accounts!” He tilted his head. “Now, just a question here and this isn’t a trick. Trixie is your roommate, but didn’t you tell me you were sleeping with her? At least in the past? I’m just confused why you’re glad she’s going?”
That was a complex set of questions. “Kind of, it’s like this,” I started before laying out the whole situation from Baltimare up until last night.
Soarin just listened and nodded along. When I finished, he gave a big sigh. “That must have been hard for you. Helping her out, trying to make her a better pony, but also not sleeping with her.”
The way he’d said it was genuine, not judgmental like Cheerful would have been. I shrugged. “Dolly knows best and she’s right. How can you mentor a pony and be her lover? Anyway, I’ll miss her, but I’m proud of what she’s accomplished.
“Plus, honestly, a live-in lover is a big commitment and Trixie is absolutely not the marrying type. I know it sounds weird coming from me. You’d think two ponies like us being under the same roof would be perfect. but it really isn’t.”
“No, I see what you’re getting at. Which reminds me. Did you mean what you said earlier, or was that just the pain and woozies?”
In this state I wasn’t able to keep my poker face so when my ears shot up I couldn’t stop them. “Which part?”
“The part about only seriously dating me.”
“Oh, I’m serious. If that is what you need to feel like I’m at least somewhat committed, I can do that. Although I want to be clear, if you find somepony else to date or I happen to, we should talk about that. I guess I’m talking exclusivity in seriousness? Flings are okay.”
He nodded and idly rubbed his chin. “I appreciate that you’re trying to meet me halfway. I want to be clear about that.”
“But…” I put in.
He shifted uncomfortably. “But full disclosure on something first.”
I blinked. “Yeah?”
“After you ran off, I was hurt. Shortly after, I started dating somepony on my team. We’re kind of still seeing each other, but it isn’t exclusive. Is that okay? I don’t want you to think I’m a hypocrite.”
My nose wrinkled and I poked him. “Don’t.” Poke. “Date.” Poke. “Coworkers. I certainly don’t care, but that is just a bad idea in general.”
“You’re not exactly in a position to give career advice. You bit a superior office last night and led guards on a medium-speed chase through restricted areas. Besides, I’m sure it will be fine. You’re really okay with it, though?”
Point, Soarin. It was my turn to be the funny one. “Yes, I’ve been saying that a while now,” I sing-songed.
He chuckled. “You’re impossible. I guess we have a deal, then.”
“Yup!” I’d done it! We weren’t going to go our separate ways. Now I just had to be more communicative about my actions was all. I grabbed more of the citrus water and downed it. That and the toast helped wash the icky taste out of my mouth.
Soarin flopped down next to me. “Good. If it is all the same to you, I think I’m worn out when it comes to serious talk. Let’s change it up. You’re at the palace every day. What is the deal with this wedding?”
Ugh, I started to feel ill again. Why did he have to pick that? “It’s a nightmare. Lady Cadence is a bridezilla, everypony is treating this like a moment of historical significance, and the whole seat of power has become a spectacle. I’m glad we’re going to get it over with in less than a month. We just need to get those two hitched and move on.”
“That sounds awful. Say, you don’t have a date for the wedding yet, do you?”
“A what now?” I replied in surprise.
“A date. You know, somepony to go with?”
I blinked. “Do you think I was invited to the wedding?”
“Were you not? Aren’t you friends with the princess?”
“I mean I am… what the hay! I never thought about that. Why wasn’t I invited?”
Soarin shrugged.
“I’m going to give her a piece of my mind. I mean, I don’t want to go, but a filly likes to be asked. What’s wrong with me? At least get me a seat in the back,” I muttered before standing straight up. That quickly proved to be a mistake. I got woozy and fell over onto Soarin.
He caught me in his big, strong, muscled forelegs.
“Oh,” I whispered.
His cheeks turned pink again. “Really?”
“Really,” I replied before looping my forelegs around his back and pulling him down into a kiss. We hadn’t been together in a while and I was going to take full advantage of the situation. It was good to be back together.
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Hungover Sunny isn't very sunny.
9755836
She's still funny though.
Sunny is a good mare when it counts.
It didn't even occur to me that Sunny might have been reporting in at the wrong place. I'm surprised she was able to lead that chase given how drunk she was.
"Right after vomiting" seems like a bad time for make-outs.
Just sayin.
This was seriously a great line! Left me snorting with laughter!
9758978 I am truly glad. This is one of my favorite chapters and things I've ever written. I am known to laugh at my own jokes. I'm bad like that but the whole explanation of what she did plus that had me laughing. I just kept trying to take it up a notch.
9758279 I agree 100% with this. I wouldn't do it! Evidently he doesn't care. Nasty pony!
9756223 Drunk Sunny tries to do what is best. As best she can... which is poorly.
9756042 She is always a good mare!
9755836 Sunny no. Funny yes!
9755837 Beat me to my pun!