Like a Phoenix

by Pyro Kittens In Suits

Staying Yourself

Curling up in the only blanket she owned, Sunset shifted on her makeshift bookbed before retrieving her beloved journal from her bag. The emblem of the colorful sun lighting up as she opened the cover in hopes of a new message from Twilight. Her eyes scanning the pages as a flutter of hope bloomed in her chest when she caught sight of the newest entry done in her friend’s precise handwriting.

“Sunset Shimmer,” It began. “I’m so sorry to hear about this Anon - a - Miss incident, and I apologize for not being able to write as often as I would like to. This Hearth Warming Eve season has my schedule brimming as both my duties as Princess and obligations to my friends and family are taking up most of my free time.”

Sunset pushed away the pang of guilt she suddenly felt from the idea that she was only further burdening Twilight with her problems. Having caused her enough distress both from stealing her crown and involving her in the Siren dilemma, she started to wonder if it was even right of her to push further on the issue when she was trying to enjoy the holiday season. Regardless, she owed her friend to at least continue reading the rest of her writing.

“I’m sure you’ve already read my previous entry on the wendigos, but to hear that the counterparts of my friend’s acting so horribly only fills me with a mix of anger and despair. And while I doubt that wendigos may be the cause of this sudden disharmony, I know for a fact you can pull through this if you stay strong, stay yourself, and find your family.”

“I wish you the absolute best Sunset, and please, please contact me if you need somepony to talk to. Your friend forever, Twilight Sparkle.”

Sunset traced the last words with her eyes again and again, thinking about the Princess’ words of advice. Until finally she closed the book, resting it beside her makeshift bedside and laying down on the pile of texts. She tried to close her eyes, willing for sleep to take her away from this uncomfortable reality just for the night, yet found herself still contemplating those words that ran through her head.

“Stay strong, stay yourself, find your family…” She muttered quietly to herself, processing the meaning of the phrase as the previous weeks played in her mind on replay. Everything from her first ever slumber party, to the downfall only days later, all building up to the past couple of days as she now tried to sleep on hard covered books, her body faintly aching from the lack of support.

It took some effort to finally close her eyes and empty her mind, even then it took a considerable number of moments to be able to drift away from consciousness. The silence of the now empty library lulling her to sleep, the only person to keep her awake was herself, who know had long last allowed herself to let go just for tonight.

~*~

“Who even am I?”

A voice echoed through the cascade of a starless sky encompassing the contrasting orange figure left stranded in the center.

“W-what?” Sunset stuttered as she began to take notice of where she was situated. She spun around on her heels in hopes of finding anything that might tell her of where she was, but was proved hopeless as she failed to make out anything other than void.

“She - Demon.” A whisper she could barely make out cut through the quiet like a knife before everything was silenced again. Hopelessly twirling around in another futile effort, Sunset searched desperately for whatever source the voice could have came from.

“You never even changed.” Another cry sounded from the space.

“You never should have crawled out of that pit.”

“Watch out, she might enslave us again.”

“Thief.”

“Monster.”

“Demon.”

Before she could comprehend what was happening, Sunset was subjected to a flurry of insults by various voices, all seething and furious. They harped on her relentlessly, leaving her a confused and anxious mess as she struggled to find any solace from the assault.Pushing her mind to move her legs, she raced in whatever direction she’d she could see, but there seemed no escape from the increasing volume of the harassment as it continued to follow her no matter where she ran.

Tripping over her own feet while trying to quickly change direction in hopes of finding solace from this nightmare, she fell to the floor with a soft thud. Pulling her knees closer and cradling her head in her arms, she waited for any sign of the torment to end as her eyes began to water, the sounds now screeching around her. But as the voices suddenly began to lower in volume, allowing her to slowly sit up as she breathed in relief, what came next made her wish for the previous scourge of abuse to return in its stead.

“It was you all along! You’re Anon - a - Miss!” Applejack’s accent was unmistakable as it yelled, striking her out of her short lived calm stupor.

“We trusted you Sunset, we thought you were are friend.” Rainbow’s voice was tinged with a sense of disappointment, buried under the anger that seethed from her.

“How could you do this? After all we’ve been through?” Rarity’s questioning was cold as ice, her bitter tone as cruel as a blizzard.

Sunset tried to object, to argue that this whole situation was never her handwork. But as she tried desperately to scream, her pleas were left unheard as she realized she was incapable of summoning her voice.

“You must’ve just been pretending to be our friend, when all along you were just after our secrets!” Pinkie’s usually cheerful personality was nowhere to be heard as she lay the accusation on Sunset. “You - you secret stealer!”

“You’re not the person we thought you were!” Fluttershy’s anger perhaps hurt the most of all, hearing the usual timid girl now screech with hatred. “You’re not our friend!”

“This is it, Sunset.” Applejack spoke up again over the overlapping voices still muted within the background. “You’re not going to take advantage of us anymore. Tell whatever secrets you want, but we don’t have to listen.”

Still desperate to contradict their claims, the lone figure continued to attempt to scream with the threat of her throat turning sore from her attempts. But it proved a futile effort as she was finally left in silence, the only thing to prevent the solitude from completely overtaking her was the telltale sound of her sniffling as her cheeks soaked themselves with tears.

“She-Demon…” She mumbled in her head.

“Anon - a - Miss.” She continued to think.

“If that’s who I am,” She felt anger rise over her as she pulled herself up from the floor, a newfound sense of energy coming from the rage washing over her. “Then I suppose it’s time to finally accept it.”

Standing with her shoulders slumped, her hair and clothes a disarray from the stress she had endured, a blazing light catched her eye as she looked over to see another figure staring at her from the sidelines.

“You.” Was all Sunset dared to say to the creature.

A demonic silhouette complete with ragged wings, fiery tail, crimson skin, and telltale fiery hair stared back with a vile smile. The mangled remains of what appeared to be the previously sought element of harmony sitting just above her head as she began a dark chuckle at her counterpart’s appearance.

“I guess they were right,” Sunset hissed in a low whisper to herself. “I never really did change.”

She didn’t look up as she began slow strides over to the now cackling monster. Her fate having been sealed as soon as all she worked to amend for was destroyed with a single demonstration of how little of her friend’s trust she had. Her hand raised mirroring that of her devilish reflection, reaching forward to grasp her outstretched claw and revert to her once cruel self.

“Stay strong.”

The soft melody of a serene tone flew by Sunset’s head akin to a gentle breeze. It moved through her mind like a cold wind, freezing her in place as she realized the speaker. The previous stupor shel had been entrapped in began to crack as she retracted her hand, holding her breath in desperate hope of hearing it speak again.

“Stay yourself.”

As her mind began to uncloud itself, Sunset gazed into the two teal eyes that burned into her, realizing the unsettling appearance was no longer her own reflection. Twilight’s words now the only echo still in her mind.

“Heh,” Sunset let out a light laugh, as she sadly smiled. “If I don’t want to return that way I was before, then it’s up to me to decide that. Not the other students, not this Anon - a - Miss, and definitely not my former friends.” She took a step back, glaring at the mirror image with a mixed expression of disgust and regret.

Ignoring the escalating cries and screams from her former appearance, it’s words overlapping as various voices spoke at once, the center of negativity and growing hatred now no longer able to haunt her as she stared it down.

“Have to learn to forgive yourself.”

Candy’s words came after Twilight’s, her voice sounding through the room, louder than all the others. A important reminder that Sunset was grateful she finally realized what it meant to move forward from her past.

“You changed as a person and become better, you did things I'd always wished I could do.”

Wallflower Blush’s usually quiet tone rang out through the empty escape, as the fiery haired girl took the words to heart, at least someone had seen she’d changed.

“You seemed so upset after you were transformed back, I always thought that you’ve must have felt awful for everything after that.”

Ditzy’s was correct about that, it was a small beam of light that some people believe her when she had tried to apologize for her past actions.

“We can see there's far more to you than just your past actions you've been amending for.”

Dawn’s echoes were louder than Sunset would have expected, as the sound stuck confident and clear through the enveloped space. It was a nice reminder to remember that she wasn’t the only one who saw what she was today was more than she used to be.

“I am truly sorry, Sunset Shimmer.”

While Trixie’s apology had been the last “sorry” she would ever have expected to hear, seeing the once fame hungry and boisterous magician show that she herself had her moments, gave her a small twinge of hope that others could one day finally see that side of her, and that she could change herself.

“I admired your work once, Shimmer.”

While Gilda’s words would usually put Sunset into a further tense mood, she took the good out of the complement while learning to accept that she had used her talents for manipulation. Afterall with what she was able to achieve in the past semesters, she could always use that same drive to do something she could call herself proud for.

As she now faced away from the twisted figure that screeched for her to return, Sunset took a deep breath and called back through her memory to a beloved song to drown out the noise. Soft electronic beats guided her footsteps as her vision began to flood with vibrant neon lights, the once shadowed space now coming to life as bursts of colors exploded around her to the rhythm. She took slow strides to enjoy the moment, her now once inescapable prison now a floret of ambition, determination, and…

“Realization.”

With that last word uttered at last by Sunset’s squeaking voice, she felt a renewed supply of tears start to streak across her face once again, though perhaps more welcomed than before. And even as she started to grow dizzy, her once clear thoughts now growing hazy as she continually attempted blink out the water in her eyes. She had realized she was smiling, laughing along with hiccuping breaths, as her consciousness lifted itself away.

Her first thought when reality came snapping back like a cold slap on the face, was that her nose was sniffling. Her second was that if she had been crying the books under her were in danger.

Quickly rising from her self constructed bed, she used the thankfully absorbent blanket pulled over her to dry her tears before giving a relieved sigh when she spotted no signs of water damage to the texts. Grabbing her phone she pressed the home button and squinted her eyes to make out the time, thirty minutes to eight, just enough to get up and start the school day.

Deconstructing her book mattress the best she could so it wouldn’t appear out of place, Sunset quickly packed her things and head for the nearest bathroom. As she covertly brushed her teeth by the sink before straightening out what bed head her sleep had caused her, she took a moment to stare in the mirror at her reflection as last night’s memories came flooding back.

Her first notice was that the eyes that stared back at her were not demonic, her skin still it’s orangish tone, and the noticeable absence of wings at her back. She smiled.

She was still Sunset Shimmer.

And she didn’t care to be anyone different.

Comments

[Ri2]

Shine on, Sunset.

[Golden Fang Ryu Shenron]

Let the magic inside of you flare and help you shine Sunset!