Well then, this gets more interesting as i go further

This is good keep up the good work

"Its alright little buddy." She said, softly patting my back. She broke the hug and stare deeply in to my eye "But you can't said those nasty words and said bad thing to other ponies."

You need to learn about the different tenses of words. For example: "said"and "stared" are past tense, "say," "saying," "stare" and "staring" are present tense, and future is "going to say."

And you also miss a lot of punctuation and plurals.
"She broke the hug and stare deeply into my eye "

*"She broke the hug and stareD deeply into my eyeS."

8849403
sure thing bud, I'll try to remember it next time.

Sure, your "killing machine" broke down from some soap... He's not behaving like a killing machine at all he's behaving like a stupid child, an adult would not have just bent over and took that ridiculous punishment. A injured colt swears and runs away and their first instinct is physical abuse? What gives applejack the right to even still be there after what she did, it should be the hospital staff only as they are the only ones qualified to do anything and she should be in jail.

8850453
I see, thanks for your input.

I'll try to focus on Doctor Horse or Redheart next chapter with all the talking.

As for the main character...I'm not too sure what to do about his behavior, just let me see what I can do about it.

how long the next chapter releasese dude

8850545
I'd love to see him try and win a princess' heart, and the break it as a not-funny prank.

Neat premise but I'm getting sick of fics where there's some scarred, insane, obviously abused Colt/filly and then they curse or say something rude so they do that shitty "wash the mouth out with soap" crap. Hell this even had them pry up his mask, that they know is screwed into his head! Shit is ridiculous. Also blah blah blah grammar and pacing and shit, you know the drill. Hopefully this gets better as it progresses.

Who the fuck just bend a child over a sink to wash the bad language out of their mouth, did they just forget that he possibly has brokens ribs and a punctured lung? Crazy fucking Basterds

10019204
I agree, and I’m shamed to say I’ve seen ponies do much stupider things in other stories.

This really feels like a mare superiority story instead of a reverse gender roles.