Chapter 3
Sorry for mega-long wait, everyone. But look! More!
Not mine, no money, no sue.
Chapter Three
“Spike! Wake up!”
“Unngh.”
“Spike!”
“Fi’ minutes, Twi,” he grunted. Then his head snapped up, an expression of awe and disbelief on his face. “Ohmigosh, Twi!?”
“No, you didn’t dream it,” she said, laughing at his gobsmacked expression. “We’re really here.”
Spike glanced down at the Elements of Harmony, glinting in the morning sunlight. “Oh.”
Diane was awake and sitting up. She was amusing herself by kicking her hind feet into the air and rocking backwards along her back. Every now and then she was able to grasp one little foot, and she would immediately stick it into her mouth and gum messily all over it. There was drool everywhere. Spike regarded her with a slightly dismayed expression. “Well isn’t that dainty.”
“Don’t bathe her,” Fluttershy instructed in a capable tone quite unlike her normal manner of speaking. “You won’t be able to hold her properly, you’re simply too big. Wipe her down with a damp cloth. She’s hungry too.”
Spike shook his head. “You see any damp cloth around here? Nah, dragons do it like this.” He blasted the baby with another short burst of fire and she giggled, grabbing at the flames with jerky, uncoordinated movements. When the fire cleared, the drool was gone and her scales were perfectly clean.
“You dragons, that’s your answer to everything,” said Applejack with a chuckle.
Spike smirked and slowly stood, gently depositing the infant onto his snout. He couldn’t quite straighten his legs without bashing his spine and head against the cave roof, and had to half-crouch. He looked rather comical with a baby sitting upon his nose peering about curiously. “Right,” he said, before stifling a yawn. “Food. I’m starving.”
“How are you going to manage that?” Rainbow asked.
He shrugged with a wry quirk of his mouth which inadvertently displayed several feet of overlocking fangs. “I’ll scrounge something together.”
“How about Diane?” asked Fluttershy.
“Ah, got something for her at least,” he said, and began to crawl out of the cave into the sunshine. He dislodged a few more boulders as he squeezed out onto the ledge where, once upon a time, Fluttershy had made a cranky red dragon burst into tears.
The day was cold and crisp, though the sun was shining. It had that dusty, papery feel of cold mornings that Twilight had always loved. Below them, the valley stretched out and Ponyville dozed in the thin dawn light. It was bigger than she remembered and none of the buildings were familiar. However on the opposite rise, just where they had always stood, she could make out rows and rows of apple trees. The air was so peaceful. It seemed impossible that beyond those mountains, unspeakable chaos was ripping the world apart.
Spike was only just able to stand on the ledge. His hind and forefeet were skirting the edges; if he rose up onto his hind feet, his head would be level with the mountain’s summit. There was no possible chance that he hadn’t been spotted by the ponies far below. With a jolt of amusement Twilight saw that his hind feet were still slightly pigeon-toed, just as they had been when he was little and primarily bipedal.
“Ooooh, that’s better. I’ve got a kink in my back,” he groaned with a catlike stretch. The pop of his bones sounded like the firing of heavy artillery. Then he sat back down onto his haunches and neatly curled his tail around his feet while his eyes scanned the ground. “Now where are they...”
“What do baby dragons eat?” Pinkie wondered.
“Just about anything, in my experience,” Twilight said. “It’s getting them to stop that’s the trick.”
“Ha ha, very funny Twilight. Aha! Here we go,” he said, triumphantly flourishing a branch that had obviously been torn from a tree. It was laughably small in his claws. “Found them growing wild on the way here. They should be all right for a while.”
“Apricots?” said Applejack dubiously. “Ain’t she gonna have a problem with the stones?”
“She could choke,” said Fluttershy, worry in her eyes.
“That’s why I’m gonna help,” Spike said patiently. “I fed her twice yesterday. We did okay.”
“How...” began Twilight, but she was silenced as Spike cleaned off a surface with a quick blast of fire and shook the branch vigorously over the warmed stone. Apricots fell and bounced, and he squinted down at them, before nodding.
“Should be enough. I wish I could get some milk into her, she needs the vitamins. She’ll get her teeth soon, though. That should make feeding her a lot easier.”
“Listen t’ you, you’re a total expert,” said Rainbow Dash.
Spike pulled a face, before squishing the apricots to mush with one press of his thumb. The pips were left standing in the orange pulp and he bent his head close, squinting, and flicked them out one by one. “I’ve seen a lot of generations come and go. You pick up some stuff.”
“No matter how girly?” teased Twilight.
Spike snorted. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. The way I see it, there’s nothing tough about letting a baby cry when you can do something about it.”
“That’s a very mature attitude, Spike,” said Rarity, surprised approval radiating from her.
“Five hundred and twelve, last birthday,” Spike said absently as he lifted the baby off his snout with care and put her down in front of the pile of apricot mush. The baby launched into the mush like a fox attacking a henhouse. Her little paws immediately reached out and she crammed a double handful into her mouth. Well, the initial target was her mouth. In practice, the stuff ended up on her face, spines, fins, feet and belly. The little dragon romped happily in her breakfast, thoroughly smearing her just-cleaned scales. Then Diane craned back to babble enthusiastically at Spike, who smiled down at her with such gentleness that Twilight felt her imaginary heart stop. “There we go, Diane. That’s better, isn’t it?” he rumbled.
“I’m sorry, Spike darling, I didn’t mean to be offensive,” said Rarity. “I keep forgetting how old you are. It just... doesn’t seem quite real.”
Spike cautiously scooped apricot gunk off Diane’s head. “No offense taken. And in case you’ve forgotten, I’m probably the largest dragon alive and you’re the invisible dead pony talking in my head from inside a magic golden necklace. I could probably write a book on what doesn’t seem real.”
“What are you gonna eat?” asked Rainbow. Her face was dubious, and Twilight couldn’t blame her. Where in Equestria was there enough food to feed a creature as immense as Spike?
He shrugged. “Don’t know. I’ll wait until she’s done before I go find something, and then we can start working with the Elements. Maybe now that you’re here I’ll have more luck.”
When Diane had finished eating, she was cleaned, burped (producing a decent flame maybe two inches long, which according to Spike meant that she was cleaning out her flame-ducts) and set to playing in the mouth of the cave. For about ten minutes the two dragons were absorbed by a game that seemed to involve a big tickling claw and a lot of giggling on Diane’s part. Spike even chuckled a few times when the little thing flopped inexpertly onto his claw in what was unmistakeably a novice pounce, wrapping her paws around it with a little ‘rawr!’ and gumming messily all over it.
“Easy, tiger,” he murmured, the bass rumble of his chuckle drifting over the valley.
She looked up at him with the jewel-like eyes of a dragon, her little mouth locked on his claw. Pinkie crowed with delight.
“Yeah, you show him who’s boss, Pinkie Junior!” she cheered.
Gently extracting his claw, Spike replaced it with a gnarled branch of the apricot tree that had provided her breakfast. Diane examined it thoroughly for a few seconds, before flopping over it and beginning to wrestle it into submission with her jerky, uncoordinated baby movements. Despite the gravity of the situation she looked so adorably serious that Twilight couldn’t help but laugh. Fluttershy was almost swooning. When Spike made to pull away, Diane made a warbling noise that was faintly querulous. He leaned down to carefully press the side-most tip of his snout against her little ridged back and blew eddies of smoke around her. Discarding the branch, Diane rolled over and grabbed at the smoke, cooing excitedly before beaming at Spike with toothless glee. She then returned to studying the branch with infant fascination, and Spike turned to the business of feeding his newly vast self.
It turned out that Twilight’s banter earlier had been more correct than she knew. Apparently dragons really could eat just about anything. She watched from the cave mouth in astonishment as Spike stripped several scrubby mountain trees of their leaves (prompting a rather vivid flashback to when he had once done the same to Applejack’s beloved farm), ate several dozen boulders (apparently granite was extremely boring but filling – the draconic equivalent of bran), demolished a cliff-face looking for gems (no luck), and spent the next few minutes picking his teeth with a gnarled branch (a chilling sight, if Twilight was honest with herself). Finally he threw the remains of the branch down into the valley below and licked his lips.
“Well, that was the worst breakfast ever,” he said. “I could sure do with that gem-finding spell of yours, Rarity.”
“I didn’t know you could eat all that,” said Twilight.
“I didn’t know either until I went to Dragonsdorf for the peace treaty,” Spike said, standing once more and shaking out his neck. “It wasn’t in any of my books, and nopony in Equestria really knows all that much about dragons. That trip was a real education, though most of them despised me because I refused to grow up. That became the thesis of doctorate number seven, actually. Ungh. I wish it hadn’t been granite, bleagh. Shale’s way better. More crumbly.”
“It’s a far cry from cake,” said Pinkie.
“Oh, don’t be mean,” he grumbled. “Unless they make ‘em eight feet across, I’m gonna miss out on cake from now on.”
He struggled back into the cave (dislodging some more stones around the entrance) and returned with the open casket. “Okay then,” he said, placing it down on the ledge and sitting back on his haunches. His neck snaked down to peer at the gold and jewels glittering in the sun. “Um. Hate to say it, but they look really tasty.”
“Spike! You are not eating the Elements of Harmony!” Twilight barked.
He scowled. “Of course I won’t! What do you think I am?”
“A dragon who just ate rocks for breakfast, that’s what!”
“Twi,” he grumbled. “I’d never eat them. Leaving aside the fact that you’re somehow tied up in them, they’re the Elements of Harmony!”
“You ate my dad’s wedding ring,” she said pointedly.
“I was two!”
“And my mother’s heirloom diamond choker,” Twilight remembered.
He huffed and rolled his eyes. “Give me a break here! I wasn’t even old enough to talk when I ate that!”
“I was going to inherit that one day!”
“How was I supposed to know it was special? It was right there in the kitchen where you usually gave me my gems!”
“It was in a locked velvet box!”
“Come on, Twilight! It’s been five hundred years, don’t you think it’s time to drop it?”
“Nopony’d think you two had ever been apart, the way you’ve gone right back to your teasing,” Dash muttered. “You still snark at each other just as much as you always did.”
Spike coughed as Twilight harrumphed rather uncomfortably. “Right,” he said. “Well. Uh, shall we get started?”
“Yes, okay, so... Elements,” said Twilight, gratefully seizing the diversion. “What have you tried so far?”
Spike tipped his head, staring thoughtfully at the jewels. “Not that much. I can’t get them over my fingers, so I can’t wear them--”
Pinkie sniggered.
“—so I tried holding them in my paw and concentrating. It didn’t work, obviously.”
“Hmm,” said Twilight, thinking hard.
“What else have you tried?” asked Rarity.
“Well,” he said, clearly uneasy with what he was about to say. “Promise me you won’t get angry?”
“Spike,” said Twilight warningly.
“What did you do?” asked Applejack.
He took a deep breath. “Well, you know how my magic’s in my body... and my... f-fire?”
“You. Didn’t.”
He winced. “I... sorta blew fire on them. It didn’t hurt them!” he added hurriedly.
“You WHAT?” yelled Rainbow Dash, and Spike jerked backward against the mountain, causing a slight tremor as his back slammed against the rock and dirt.
“It didn’t hurt them,” he repeated in a more defensive tone. “The gold didn’t even get hot. What was I supposed to do, sit on them? It was the gentlest flame I could produce--”
“Spike, we’re in those things!” bellowed Applejack. “Y’ coulda killed us!”
Spike scratched his face. “Um...”
“Well, fine, not killed exactly. But you know what I mean!”
“I didn’t know you were in there, did I?” he tried to say, but Applejack was having none of it. She was pawing at the ground with one hoof, her head tossing and snorts of anger coming from her nose.
“Don’t you ever do somethin’ like that again!” she said, eyes flashing. “Consarnit, if I could get my hooves on you, I’d whip twelve types of tarnation outta your sorry hide, dragon or no!”
“AJ?” said Rainbow Dash conversationally.
Applejack whirled. “What now, Rainbow?” she snapped.
“Nice hat.”
Applejack rolled her eyes. “What in Equestria is that supposed t’ mean?”
“It means nice hat,” Pinkie supplied. “Because your hat is nice!”
“Why not me?” Rarity wailed. “Oh, this is the worst, the very worst! Possible! Thing!”
“Y’ mean,” Applejack began, and then she looked down at her hooves. Her eyes widened.
“Those’re mah hooves, then,” she said in a very shaky voice. “Hey there, little darlin’s. I missed you.”
“And I don’t even have a chaise longue!” Rarity continued in a tragic voice.
“Honesty,” said Twilight, trying to be glad for her friend. “You told the truth, even though you knew it would make us upset.”
Spike looked a little lost. “Am I following this right? Applejack’s made it to Ghost Level?”
“That’s right,” Pinkie chirped. “Because you were honest with us!”
He carefully unplastered himself from the mountainside, and held one paw over Diane’s little head to stop the shower of pebbles and dirt from landing on her. “Well, that was a lesson from a long time ago,” he said. “Be honest and don’t mess about with owls, for they are subtle and quick to point out what an idiot you’re being.”
“Y’ still tried to melt us,” said Applejack stubbornly. She was trotting on the spot, watching her feet move with every sign of enjoyment.
“I didn’t, I promise,” Spike said, the fins either side of his head lifting earnestly. “I was really careful. That flame wouldn’t have melted chocolate!”
“Chooooooclaaaaate,” Pinkie said with a long, wistful sigh.
“Spike, I command you to do something generous!” Rarity said imperiously.
“Oh brother,” Twilight sighed.
Applejack reared forwards and bucked at thin air. “Yeee-haw, now that’s a feelin’ I’ve missed!” she cried, and did it again.
“This isn’t getting us anywhere,” said Twilight with barely-suppressed annoyance. Her friends were appearing all around her, and now it was only herself and Rarity without some sort of physical form. Though she knew it could hardly be blamed on Spike, she was beginning to feel upset with him for not invoking her first, and even a bit jealous of the others.
Spike cringed a little. No doubt he could hear her irritation – he’d always had that ability. “Twi?”
She sighed. “Let’s just concentrate on the Elements again, shall we?”
“What else can we try?” asked Rainbow, pulling a face at her own ruby necklace.
“Can you put them on your spikes?” asked Fluttershy. “They look... uh, really pointy.” The last word was squeaked rather than said.
Spike almost went cross-eyed trying to focus on the razor-sharp length that hung over his forehead. It had been the highest and largest of his baby spines, and remained the longest now. It curved out above his brow nearly to the length of his snout. “Won’t they fall off?”
“Let’s try,” said Applejack. “Ain’t no harm in trying.”
Twilight squashed her surge of annoyance.
Spike carefully lifted out an Element and pinched his spike between two claws. He was so clever with his forepaws, Twilight mused. Those huge claws could lift a tiny necklace and soothe a baby, as well as rip stone from a mountain and uproot whole trees. His penmanship had always been neater than hers, too. More fine motor control than even her magic, she supposed. It seemed there was something to be said for opposable thumbs.
The Element slid over the tip of the green spike a little way. He slowly exhaled, and very gently released the spike.
“Looks like it’s staying put,” said Rainbow Dash.
Pinkie took one look, and broke into hysterics. Spike scowled.
“Ignore the comedian, Spike. D’you think you could use it?” asked Applejack, her head tipping as she squinted up at the tiny necklace surmounting the giant.
He grimaced. “I’ll try. Which one was it?”
“Kindness again,” said Applejack after a brief frown. “S’pink.”
Spike closed his eyes and his eyebrows knitted together as he concentrated. The necklace seemed to shine a little brighter in the morning sunshine, but no beam of light came from the jewelled butterfly.
“Stop, Spike, it’s not working,” said Twilight. There was a sinking feeling where her stomach should be.
He blinked open. “Nothing?”
“Nada, zilch, zip, zero, bugger-all, diddly-squat, Sweet Fanny Apples,” Pinkie said cheerfully.
“It looked a bit shinier, but that’s it,” said Rainbow.
“Maybe Fluttershy should be up there?” said Rarity.
“Up... there?” said Fluttershy, her voice fainter than her outline.
“Doesn’t look like she’s jumpin’ fer joy at that idea, Rarity,” said Applejack.
“Well, it’s just... so high,” the pegasus said, trembling a little and ducking behind her hair. “And... Spike is... a vry bg drgn...”
His face fell a little. “Oh.”
“Now, I’m sure Fluttershy isn’t afraid of you, Spike dear,” said Rarity loudly, before hissing, “Fluttershy! You’re hurting his feelings!”
“No, no, I understand,” Spike sighed, carefully unhooking the necklace. “Fluttershy’s afraid of dragons... and now I’m probably the biggest one ever.”
“I’m not scared of Spike,” Fluttershy said, making herself even smaller. “It’s just an awfully big change.”
Pinkie nodded. “Awfully big everything.”
With an internal wince Twilight thought back to the many times she had been afraid, taken aback or simply shocked by Spike’s new and fierce appearance. “Look, it’s just something we’re going to have to get used to,” she said in as comforting a voice as she could manage. “You’re still our Spike.”
“Is it just the size thing, or is it the... the teeth?” Spike asked in a neutral voice. “Or something else?”
“Allofit,” mumbled Fluttershy.
“Well, I’m not afraid of you,” announced Rainbow Dash. “Hah, as if! Fish out my necklace and let’s do this thing!”
With a sigh so small Twilight almost missed it, Spike laid the Element of Kindness back in the casket and drew out the glinting Element of Loyalty. “Do I have to put it on my head too?” he asked a little plaintively.
Pinkie bounced happily, giggles escaping her as she chanted, “Do it! Do it, do it, do it, doitdoitdoitdoit...”
“Pinkie,” Rarity snapped.
“But it looks so funny...”
Spike sat back onto his haunches and arranged the necklace on his palm with deft strokes of a claw. “Okay,” he said, sweeping what was to him an apparently-bare rocky shelf with his gaze. “Maybe you can just sit in my paw with the Element? We’ll see if that works...”
“Worth a try,” Applejack agreed.
“I can’t see you, so tell me when you’re there,” he continued, lowering his upturned paw to the ground. Rainbow Dash gulped at the sight of that ring of huge claws, and set her jaw. Her wings spread, and she flew with unusual caution to settle in Spike’s palm. Her feet gingerly alighted on his scales.
“Okay, I’m in,” she said.
“I can’t feel a thing,” he said, staring intently at his palm.
“I’m standing right here,” she said, and stamped her hoof twice. Then she let out a yelp as the paw began to rise into the air. “I’m okay, I’m okay, just lost my balance...”
“How come his paw ain’t passing right through her?” wondered Applejack.
“Does it look like I know?” said Twilight, watching as Rainbow rose higher and higher without twitching a feather. He brought his forepaw up close to his face, and Twilight stifled a nervous giggle. It looked like a scene from a fairy tale – a fairy tale turned upside down and inside out.
“Now what?” Spike rumbled.
“Let’s both concentrate on it,” Dash suggested. “Maybe it’ll take both of us.”
“Okay then.” His eyes slid shut again, and his brow creased in thought. Rainbow Dash lowered her head and placed her forehooves either side of the Element of Loyalty, giving it a determined scowl before her eyes also closed in concentration. Twilight held her breath – no mean feat. Considering.
“Anything?” Pinkie whispered.
“I cain’t see,” Applejack whispered back.
“Shhh!” hissed Rarity, her Self buzzing with anticipation.
A minute passed.
“How about now?” Pinkie whispered once more.
Disappointment washed over Twilight. “I suppose that didn’t work either,” she said, trying to keep the frustration out of her voice.
Spike’s eyes opened, and he regarded the Element glumly. “Guess not.”
“Look, we’ll just keep trying,” said Rainbow, lifting her head to smile at Spike. She jerked back with a slight gasp at how near the giant face was, looming over her like that. The smile faltered for a moment, but she bolstered it quickly and it became a grin of challenge. She tossed her mane. “There’s no way some dopey little necklace is gonna defeat us! It’s just no match for our awesomosity!”
“Maybe...” Rarity said, as Spike lowered his paw to the ground again.
“Hmm?”
“Well, it’s just a thought, but perhaps the reason we can see Rainbow Dash is because she’s not entirely in her Element anymore? She was... what was that word you used, Twilight dear?”
“Invoked,” Twilight replied, not sure where Rarity was going with this.
“Precisely, invoked, thank you Twilight. So when you invoked her, could it be that you called her into the world and completely out of the necklace... and so your connection to the actual Element of Loyalty was lost?”
“Unlike us!” Twilight finished. “Great idea, Rarity! Spike, try it with the Element of Magic!”
“A-hem?”
“Oh, fine, Magic or Generosity,” she said sullenly.
Spike shifted a little on his haunches, his eyes trained to his palm. “Is she off?” he asked nopony in particular.
“Yeah,” said Rainbow, flying the last few feet from his palm to the ground. “I’m off.”
“Spike?” asked Twilight.
“Look, I’m sorry, Twilight,” he said, picking up the Element of Loyalty and putting it back into the casket. He kept his eyes fixed on his fingers as they moved. “I want you to make it to this Ghost Level too, you know I do...”
“But you’re choosing Rarity,” Twilight said, rather hurt and trying (unsuccessfully) to sound practical and unaffected.
“No!” He lifted his head and gazed past her, his face imploring. “I want you both back. I’m not playing favourites, and it’s got nothing to do with the torch I’ve carried for Rarity all these years. You’re the closest thing I’ve ever had to a family of my very own - my mother, my sister and my best friend all in one – Twilight, do you honestly believe I could ever choose anypony before you?”
She looked up into his eyes. They were filled with that yearning again, and perhaps it was her imagination but she thought she could see a touch of fear.
“I just can’t use your Element, Twi,” he said, and his claw brushed over the star-surmounted tiara. “I can’t touch my magic the way you can.”
He was still for a moment, the claw hovering over the crown.
Then he tapped the purple necklace. The amethyst chimed under his clawtip. “But I know how it feels to be generous,” he said. “That, I can do.”
“Spike, I didn’t mean to...” Twilight began, now feeling a little bewildered and extremely upset.
“Sorry, no, that was my fault,” he said, roughly shaking his head. “I said that badly. I’m too used to missing you, I guess. This still seems so unreal and I keep thinking that it’s all in my head, or that you’ll just disappear. Not that I can see you anyway, but...”
“We’re really here, I promise...”
“I want to believe that, I want that so much. I don’t wanna be that crazy guy who talks to himself all the...”
“I just want to have hooves again. A face, a body, eyes... I know that might not seem like such a big deal when you can’t see any of us at all, but...”
“No, I get it. After all, look what happened to me. I’m not myself anymore, and it feels both wrong and right...”
“I guess you do understand it at that... I just - I suppose it felt like you were deliberately choosing against...”
“I would never do that, never. Not to anypony, and especially not to you, Twilight...”
“Were there ever two ponies as bad as you at gettin’ to the point?” Rainbow cut in.
“Spike’s a dragon, not a pony,” Pinkie said helpfully.
“Hah, um,” Spike said, rubbing the back of his neck. His eyes darted to the left in embarrassment. “Oh, look at that, Diane’s falling asleep, be right back!” he exclaimed, and turned to where the baby was nodding and yawning. The six of them were abruptly presented with his side, a huge expanse of purple that effectively hid his face.
There was a silence.
“Did he just say--” Rarity began.
“Yes,” said Fluttershy, eyes enormous.
“Oh.”
There was another silence.
“So he’s loved me for--” Rarity started once more.
“Uh-huh,” said Applejack.
“I see.”
The emotions now flooding from Rarity could have flattened mountains.
“I didn’t know,” she whispered.
“Horseapples,” Applejack retorted. “Y’ always knew how he felt.”
“Well yes, but I didn’t think he’d...” she said, but her voice faded away. Then she pulled herself together (figuratively) and said, “I never thought to look beyond... I didn’t think that, after I was gone, he would still...”
“Oh my,” said Fluttershy soulfully. “He’s loved you for five hundred years. Oh, Rarity, how romantic!”
“Romantic!?” Rarity almost shrieked. “It’s horrible! I didn’t want him to pine forever! I didn’t want to hurt him! I didn’t want that!”
“He’s a dragon, Rarity,” said Twilight, looking up at the vast scaled wall before them. She was trying not to see it as a metaphor, really she was. “I didn’t think of it either. What they have, they keep. They’re not exactly famous for letting go.”
“And what he had – no, has – is love,” murmured Fluttershy. “He never had hope, but he had love, and so he kept it. For you, for all of us. No wonder he’s been so lonely. He can’t move on. Everything he is simply won’t let him.”
“An’ so it’s still there, ain’t it?” Applejack said. “He’s still got all those old feelin’s, even covered over with centuries o’ denial. He kept them safe. Landsakes, now, that’s why he was able t’ grow up, ain’t it? Wantin’ something with no hope o’ ever gettin’ it.”
“But we’re here!” burst out Rainbow Dash.
“Don’t matter,” Applejack said, pushing her hat back on her head. “We’re here, an’ yet we’re not. Five hundred years is a long, long time. He’s missed us an’ loved us, but he ain’t let himself want us, not ‘til he opened that there casket and burst through the roof. No wonder he thinks he’s goin’ dolally, hearin’ us but not seeing anypony at all. He just let loose five hundred years o’ wishin’ without hope. I’m thinkin’ that’s a special sort of torture.”
“Oh, and not to mention that he was afraid of losing his marbles and going totally stark-staring building-stomping pony-chomping ca-RAY-zy,” Pinkie said, her ears drooping.
“An’ there’s that too,” Applejack agreed. “I’m thinkin’ that he don’t trust his own brain since he grew. He’s too afraid o’ last time.”
Rarity was unravelling, her sadness and guilt and admiration and astonishment (and something very much like reluctant love) flying through them like knives. “No!” she said angrily. “No, no, no, no, NO! Oh, that is the very limit! The darling lonely thing, hasn’t he given up enough? He can’t give up hope too. He shan’t. Rainbow Dash, I am somewhat amazed that I am about to say this... but you were right! We are going to make him see us if it is the last thing we do!”
“He can hear us,” Rainbow Dash pointed out, frowning at Rarity’s choice of words.
“Maybe seeing us is the next stage,” said Twilight.
“We have to make him believe,” Rarity declared. “He can’t give up hope. He simply can’t!”
“Rarity,” Fluttershy said, looking down at her hooves. “He might be giving up his life.”
Rarity’s burst of anger and denial sent them reeling before they were hit with shockwaves of her despair.
Then they became aware of a low, rumbling noise and Pinkie pursed her lips. “Is that... a lullaby?”
“Oh,” Rarity said with a little gasp, her voice snapping from outraged and tearful to soft and nostalgic in the blink of an eye. She’d always had the ability to change emotional tracks as fast as thought. Twilight rather envied that ability. Rarity was exuding a longing so deep and natural that it spoke to them all on the most fundamental level possible. “My mother sang that to me... I remember,” she said softly.
“Me too... and I sang it to Spike,” Twilight said. Memories, sweet and childish, rose unbidden: of a tiny soft claw wrapped around her hoof, of scales nuzzling against her fur, of big green eyes full of regretful tears as a beloved toy merrily burned, of a little body that clung trustingly to her when the night was too big and scary to understand. Through them all she could hear that puckish little chortle. “I sang it to that giant dragon there - half a millennium ago. Isn’t that just completely incredible?”
If she’d had a throat, it would have been blocked by her heart.
“Hush now, quiet now, it’s time to lay your sleepy head,” Fluttershy sang under her breath, and Applejack gave a little laugh.
“Aw, now, Apple Bloom loved that song,” she said. “One o’ her friends could bash it out like nopony’s business, but she liked it the way Granny sang it, all soft an’ sweet an’ crackly. Apple Bloom...” Applejack trailed off, and then took a huge breath of realisation. “Oh Celestia, mah sister, Apple Bloom! G-Granny, Granny Smith. Mac--”
“Squirt,” said Rainbow, her tone faintly wondering.
“It was my Sweetie!” Rarity exclaimed. “When mother sang it to Sweetie Belle, she learned it in two shakes of a pony’s tail! Oh, I must know, I must! What happened to my darling Sweetie Belle?”
“No.”
“Twilight?” said Pinkie curiously.
“No? ‘No’ what, sugarcube?”
“I think we should steer clear of this topic,” Twilight said in a voice of steel. “I can’t remember anything that happened a few years after moving to Ponyville. How about you?”
After a few puzzled glances, it was determined that they were all in the same boat. Despite the return of many of their memories, they couldn’t yet remember beyond a few years after Twilight and Spike had taken over the Library. Beyond that was all still a yawning blank.
“Girls, listen to me. I know you’re remembering your families now, but think about it. Whatever happened to our families, do you really, really want to know? What if it was horrible? We can’t do anything about it now, and knowing will only torture us unnecessarily. Also, I don’t know how I died. None of us do. Anything could have happened to them. Anything could have happened to us. If it did, could you bear to hear it?” Twilight paused for a breath she didn’t need to take. “I’d rather have them alive in my memory than hear about their deaths. And I don’t want to hear about how I left hi-them.”
“Easy fer you to say, Twilight, your family’s sittin’ right there, larger than life!” Applejack said furiously.
“An’ life’s never been larger,” said Rainbow Dash dryly.
“Oh, really? My mum? My dad? My big brother?” Twilight snapped back. “You see them here? No! No, we should let Spike decide. He’s the one who knows.”
“They ain’t his kin!”
“But he knows us, and he’d know what we should hear,” Twilight said. “I trust him to do what’s best for us.”
“But Spike’s just... well, he’s...”
“He’s five hundred and twelve years old. It’s been a long time since Spike was truly a baby,” Fluttershy said quietly. “His judgement is likely to be more measured than any of ours. I agree with Twilight.”
Spike turned back to them, his body moving silently but inexorably, like an iceberg. “Shh, guys,” he whispered. “I just got her to sleep.”
Pinkie blew a disdainful raspberry. “So? She can’t hear us, can she?”
“Spike,” Rarity began.
“Yeah?” He sat back down and rubbed at his eyes. His hand stopped as he registered the tone of her voice. Concern flew over his features. “Wait, are you okay? Is something wrong?”
“We have two questions,” Twilight cut in.
His brows began to lower. “Oh...kay?”
“First one,” she said shortly before Rarity or Applejack could interrupt, “do you really and truly believe that we’re here? And second one,” she forged on, ignoring his brief intake of breath, “we can’t remember anything beyond a couple of years after you and I moved to Ponyville. We can’t remember what happened to us or to our families. If there was something you could tell us,” she paused and looked up at him, “would you?”
He was silent.
“Spike?” Fluttershy ventured.
He was as still as the mountain behind him for a long moment, and then his shoulders gradually straightened – as though preparing for a confrontation. Yet he remained silent, breathing deeply as he thought. Smoke curled from his snout and created wild and elusive patterns in those iridescent dragon eyes.
“I don’t know if you’re here,” he finally said. “Sometimes I think you are, and sometimes I think I’m crazy. I don’t know if letting myself believe will force the greed out of control. I don’t know if what I did in order to grow up drove me mad. It could have. We’re not the most stable of creatures, dragons.”
“But darling...” Rarity said anxiously. He raised his chin and spoke right over the top of her protests.
“I’m not telling you a thing about how you... how you died,” he said evenly.
“Good,” Twilight said. Her natural curiosity shrieked at her, but she squashed it with grim determination.
Spike looked down at his paws. “If you’re really here to hear it, of course,” he added with such consummate bitterness that it took Twilight’s breath away – in a purely metaphysical sense.
“We’ll find a way to convince you,” she said, ignoring the trembling of her voice.
He snorted softly, darkly. “Ah, but Twilight, what if that’s the last thing you should do?”
This - this was what five hundred years had done to her little friend. Turning to stone was a mere trifle compared to this, the true heart of him, the very barest bones. The cynicism in his voice was devastating. Applejack’s perceptive words kept echoing through her mind.
He was the one who loved without hope and was left behind.
His head lowered a little more as he began to speak. “Sweetie Belle was a singer,” he said. It sounded like he was reciting from a script in his head. “Jazz, mostly. She became famous for her big throaty numbers. She had a long full life, married twice, had three foals. She was happy. Apple Bloom was a handymare. She and her partner, Candlelight, adopted a pegasus called Shooting Star. Star was a nice little filly who later took on the name Star Apple. Big Macintosh married, had a whole boatload of children. The Apple Family is still the biggest in Equestria – even after what happened to Appleoosa. Scootaloo was a stunt-flyer for Canterlotian Pictures, best in her field. She got married to a famous director - no foals though. She didn’t want kids of her own. We used to joke that I was everypony’s uncle and she was everypony’s auntie. She stayed my friend until the day she died, and never left Ponyville. The memories were like old friends, she used to say.”
As he spoke, Spike’s voice fell into the rhythmic, dreamy cadences of somepony who had escaped into memories. With growing concern, Twilight realised that he felt more alive there than in the real world. To him this was not a recitation of his friends’ lives, but the list of those who had left him behind.
In the real world, everypony was dead.
It was little surprise he was having difficulty believing them.
“The Cake Twins both produced more Cake Twins, who produced yet more. Pumpkin named her daughter Laughter Cake. There’s a suburb in Ponyville called Caketown now, and the family is full of entrepreneurs in hospitality and event management of the first order. You’d be proud, Pinkie Pie. Oh, also Pinkie, the rock farm is now in the hooves of Blackbird Pie, who is descended from Inky. His cousin Custard Pie runs a little joke shop in Ponyville proper. Fluttershy, the animal sanctuary now covers forty hectares east of the Everfree Forest, and has the largest rabbit colony in the world. Your mum and dad and sister ran it after you ... left, in your name. Your sister started the Animal Hospice program in your honour. Twilight, your mum and dad passed away peacefully at a ripe old age and within five years of each other. Your brother married his true love and they had a wonderful bond. It was the sharing of equals, the kind of real-world day-to-day warmth and comfort that is so rarely seen. He lived his life to the utmost, loved her to the fullest. She didn’t stay for long after he died. And that’s all I’m going to say.”
The silence that fell was as thick and suffocating as a shroud.
“Th...” Twilight said, and then bolstered her courage. “Thank you, Spike.”
Applejack had her hooves pressed over her mouth. Rainbow Dash was wide-eyed and open-mouthed. Pinkie was smiling through her tears, and Fluttershy had her head bowed and her face completely hidden from view. Spike looked like the stone he had so nearly become, his face fixed and impenetrable. The four insubstantial ponies and the great beast were completely still. To Twilight, it looked like a photograph at a funeral.
She was slowly beginning to understand what he had undergone after their... their departure, she decided to call it. She hadn’t understood such soul-deep loneliness before this. Oh, perhaps she had been lonely before Nightmare Moon and Ponyville but she hadn’t really known it, so perfectly content with her books and her studies and her little dragon companion. She was now convinced that what she had felt was a mere puddle compared to the depths he had plumbed. After hearing the roll-call of all that had left him, two things were made abundantly clear: that he had never really moved on (though she hardly needed more proof of that), and that she couldn’t really begin to fathom it. She couldn’t even consider the deaths of her parents and BBBFF with any real clarity. It was too distant, too abstract, too unreal for them to be dead. For Spike, it had been all too real. Worse, it had remained real through the long, lonely centuries that had followed.
“How is he even sane?” whispered Pinkie, as though hearing Twilight’s thoughts.
“So if that’s over with, let’s get back to the Elements,” said Spike, his face carved in stone and his eyes flat.
“Darling,” Rarity said miserably. “Please believe that we’re here with you. We won’t ever go away without you ever again, I promise.”
He inhaled slowly, and then exhaled a long, smooth stream of smoke. “The Elements,” he reminded her.
“The Elements,” Twilight repeated dully. She felt hollowed out, peeled and cored. She wanted to rage at the scepticism with which he was protecting his sanity, and at his stupid self-destructive martyrdom. She wanted to shatter the loneliness that was eating away at him, bite by savage bite. She wanted to hold him tight and feel his little arms fling around her neck with that clumsy, joyous abandon one more time.
Maybe Spike wasn’t the only one lost in the swirl of memories.
She wanted his eyes to part the layers of whatever magic was separating them, and see her.
Spike fished in the casket, and drew out a gleaming Element of Harmony. He studied the amethyst for a few seconds, before laying it gently in his forepaw. “Come on then, milady,” he said in a voice so full of resignation that it almost made Twilight howl. “Let’s think about generosity.”
~**~
Stats
Page generated in 0.069 seconds
Total duration
952 users online
220,643 hits today, 2,244,100 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Sorry for the long wait, everybody!
I hope you enjoy :D
1357457
Oh God, yes.
This is one of the most evocative stories in the fandom. Holy hell.
Wrong code tag. You are looking for "size=#" "/size" with brackets instead of quotes and a number value for #.
Update? Yessssss. The only way this day could be better is if Dusk and Dawn updated at the same time.
Ah, old memories, the number one cause of insanity for immortals
Ah, now that was a good chapter! Well worth the wait!
Imagine Rainbow Dash slaming into a window of Applejack's house. Instead of smashing through the window or falling off, she stays plastered there. She pulls only her head away and stares through the glass. She drools at the sight within. Barrels upon barrels of fresh apple cider. A near psychotic grin stretches from ear to ear.
I'm RD and stories are my cider. Though I'm much less behaved when I don't get my 'cider'. Also, just one more chapter is never enough. MORE 'DAKKA'!
Damn, you have a real knack for bringing out the tears, ha.
"We call you fools, even slay you, because we cannot be you."- Makuta Krika.
Only an immortal can know true sadness. Madness is an inevitability. The mortals are pampered by their short lives while the immortals are left behind with only ash and loneliness. Death is a mercy to be given, and naivety is the most enviable of gifts. The immortals would hate mortals, because they cannot be mortal.
In other words; immortality sucks.
An update?! YESSS
that should be "BBBFF"
still, that was an Awesome chapter. Can't wait for the next update
Hmm... Hhhhmmmmmmmmmmm...
It's sounding to me like as though the reason they can't remember past that point, is because they didn't LIVE past that point. They didn't die from old age.
Goodness gracious, that was powerful. What interesting and heartbreaking insights into Spike's unusual existence. You're a master of Adult-Spike's psychology, evident now in more than one level. The fates of their families was... *phew*. Can't even think of words. It was beautiful.
I'm really loving this. Been waiting for a while. Hopefully the next one will come sooner? ;}
1358161
Looks likely. No mention of any of them having kids either.
Also did SA not marry Cadence? They were all there for the wedding. Unless they died before that.
1358123
WHOOPS. Thanks!
1358273
Welp, I don't mention their names, but I have Spike tell Twilight the fate of her brother and his wife. So yeah, that did happen in this 'verse.
Thanks for commenting, everypony! Again, so sorry to make you wait so long!
Well now I have a reason to stand up from my computer and go to the bathroom to.. um.. I swear, it's not for the purpose of washing my face. Yeah, it's for something else. Definitely.
Another wonderful chapter - sad, so sad, yet still so very beautiful in its own way. Must have been a very tragic passing of Twi & friends for Spike to be affected that much by it, poor little thing
Can't wait for more - as long as it's this good quality, I really don't mind waiting though
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Vinyl2.png Spike is a mean butt
I said it once and I will say it again. I love you. You are one of the greatest Spike writers ever, as you masterfully create the woes and fears of growing up.
Best wishes!
Oh my god, this story is just incredible. I've been really looking forward to another chapter, and it did not disappoint.
1358273 Possibly he did, and Cadence is gone. Dead perhaps, or in self-exile, or Somewhere Else.
"She was trying not to see it as a metaphor, really she was." That's a goodun right there. Combined with Rarity's realisations, Twilight's devastating understanding... emotions are high this side of the computer screen.
1358380 My theory would be that they don't remember anything after Discord, or any time between him and the wedding during which they activated the EoH for some reason and that they are only imprints that have practically become the original. Or they were kinda absorbed into the EoH, which would explain the "after you ... left". Or I should just shut up and wait 'til the revelation of what happened.
1357950 Honestly, I think beings with lifespans this long would have something built into their psyches somewhere that would keep them from going mad at all the old memories and feelings. Otherwise, what you said would be true, and in that case, why would these lifespans develop in the first place, no matter whether the world is based on evolution or a creation myth? These species would have died out from depression ages ago. Spike here is a special case, obviously, but consider Celestia - she's millennia old and not all that insane. Even Luna seems to have gone back to a relatively normal personality once the evil was burnt out of her.
generosity should be easy there. He just gave them a lot, opening old memories in the process
do love. want more.
no connection to it takes a village though, i presume
Beyond fantastic. Only complaint is that I don't like who the antagonist is, it just seems like the super fusion of all the enemies that you see when some series jumps the shark. That is however, extremely minor. I hope for more, and soon because this fic is just out of this world.
This is more serious than your last one. I love it.
1359210
I assume suicide.
1359995 Celestia is the only immortal being in the show that hasn't flipped her lid at some point. Discord is the spirit of chaos, which entails madness. And Luna drove herself crazy with envy and evil magic. Celestia is a master of magic, she's probably protected herself from mental collapse, probably at some point after Luna went nuts.
Although, you do have a point. It is my personal belief that immortality would never evolve, there is no practical application for it. But, what has every sentient being craved since it realized death was inevitable? Immortality; an immortal race would probably be founded by an unimaginably skilled warlock who decided that he didn't want such a shroud hanging over his children. Poor guy probably only realized his mistake after he died.
But, I see you seem to have missed my point. My point -as you should have been able to tell by the quote- was that immortals would resent and hate mortals. As mortals get the privilege of death, while immortals do not.
This lecture was brought to you by my compulsive contemplation of death.
1362897 Death is a gift - but then, so is immortality. Both sides would probably resent each other for having the other gift, and they would probably grow apart - see also Lord of the Rings, where we have this exact scenario with Men and Elves. (Might I add that Aragorn is really into older women, considering that Arwen is over 2,500 years old?
) It would probably lead to the two parties involved avoiding - or exterminating - each other.
Oh, and also? Death, from a purely biological viewpoint, is a failure of the repair modules in the body due to slight errors in the genes (at least, that's what Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri taught me) - it is a bug, not a feature. It might not be possible in our world to weed it out via evolution, but who can tell what's possible in a world with different parameters? (Not going into the spiritual ramifications here, just saying that from a purely mechanical viewpoint, death could probably be avoided if the technology or the evolutionary pressures were different.)
And why would this hypothetical powerful warlock not gift himself with immortality while he was at it? People who fear death like that usually start with themselves in these experiments.
Celestia and Luna must also have been at it for quite a while before Discord, but we have no way of knowing how long.
And finally, while this might be an academical distinction, we're possibly not even talking immortality here, although it might look that way from the point of view of a being with a normal lifespan. We're talking extremely long-lived mortal - and beings like that do exist in reality, even if they're not sentient. Giant tortoises can live up to two centuries, and don't get me started on trees or fungi. Immortality might be impractical, but longevity does evolve naturally, and I still believe sentient beings who grew out of this kind of long-lived species would have a psychological makeup to go with their lifespans. Of course, interactions with short-lived beings might still lead to heartbreak and all that, but evolution can't plan ahead.
1362985 To answer the question of why the warlock wouldn't make himself immortal; I was working under the assumption that such an enhancement would need to be rooted on a genetic level, making it impossible for an adult being to execute properly on itself. DNA starts decaying the second a creature reaches physical maturity, at most our warlock would be able to add an extra hundred years onto his lifespan. He would be unable to stop the aging process on his own body while still retaining bodily functions, only slow it. Whereas a developing embryo or child's DNA could be programmed not to decay, while still being able to perform properly, as the DNA has yet to begin breaking down.
Immortality from a biological standpoint doesn't work because it would ruin any ecosystem it came into contact with. Think about it, if a creature never dies, than it has no need to reproduce. If a creature never dies, it will only take from the ecosystem without properly giving back. [I am assuming, for the sake of argument, that this creature is not sentient.] The balance of nature relies on the fact that everything dies. Anything that doesn't will have no natural predators and populate out of control, or be stuck, and contrary to popular belief, the brain can only hold so much information before it shorts out. An immortal creature would have no idea what was going on around it, ever, its brain would essentially have to wipe itself every few decades in order to remain functional.
A massively long lived mortal an an immortal, among short lived mortals, are essentially the same thing. So, for the sake of this discussion, we don't really have to make a distinction.
1363050 You brought up the point of immortals envying mortals their ability to die, and in that context, there is a massive difference between "mortal, yet long-lived" and "functionally immortal". The former doesn't have that envy. It's just the question of how long the lifespan must become before the longevity becomes a curse (incidentally, this fandom has taken "immortality as a curse" to such ridiculous lengths that it's almost on the level of "so beautiful, it's a curse". Both are justifiable, but both have been run into the ground to such an extent that it takes a truly remarkable writer to use them sensibly).
No predators? Why? "Immortal" as used in this context doesn't imply "unkillable" - and a species that doesn't die naturally would bring out better predators, not worse. Granted, dragons probably sit on top of the food chain, but that's not directly related to their slow aging.
1362897 No practical application for immortality? What? That's crazy talk! From a purely evolutionary perspective, an immortal creature would be around for hundreds upon hundreds of years to breed and sow its genes. That sounds like a pretty damn practical application!
I don't believe in the whole 'ennui of the immortals' rot. When you're that old, I think at some point you have to learn to get over things.
FEELS.
1363207 I yield to you sir, I can find no counterargument for your statement. Thank you for a very stimulating, if short, debate. Hopefully you found me as interesting as I find you.
1367693 Heh. I honestly don't know what to say. You did bring up some good points, and I enjoyed this little exchange tremendously.
Also, am I imagining things, or did this debate actually win me a new reader?
Welcome!
1369020 I make a point of checking out anyone who manages to hold my attention.
I wonder where this story will go considering Discord's making a good portion of the world go to hell in a hand basket. Good to see you're still writing! I was kinda worried we'd seen the last of ya.
Great story, keep up the good work.
Okay I found a song that I think just has emotion. Though it is by Muse, and I am not sure what type of music interests you. But for me it is loaded with feels and thinking about certain parts of this chapter made me realize that this would really enhance the feels.
All the Links!
Best wishes!
This is exquisite. I'm definitely looking forward to more, especially what happens as Spike's connection to the Elements continues to grow.
One of the better stories in the fandom.
I await your next installment!
1358161 1358273
Personal theory as to why their memories end there, perhaps their essences are "saved" by the elements in the states they were in the last time they activated the elements.
As for SA and Cadance, this is an AU fic so they might not even exist in this one.
This fic is beautiful.
My Theories:
-Two options for mane 6 "death," seeing as they do not remember the Royal Wedding.
1. Their current "selves" are merely backups, shades of a sort, stored on the Elements like a hard drive. Whenever they use the EoH, it makes a new "backup" of the user(s). They died sometime after S2 ended.
OR
2. S2 never happened. At least, not with the Mane 6 present. They used the EoH on Discord and were absorbed into them. Whether or not the funerals were empty-casket is irrelevant. The rest of S2 happens without them, altered of course to happen with them not present.
-Cadance still lives, but without her True Love went into seclusion. I have the feeling she has moved on, but for some reason never came back anyway.
-The "stages" of the EoH
1. In the Darkness(Unactivated)
2. Disembodied Mind(Unactivated, prepped for activation)
3. Invisible Ghost(Activated, prepped for usage)
4. Visible Ghost(In-use/just about to be used)
5a. Embodiment(Post-usage, just have to wonder about the power and sustainability of this stage. Might be permanent(immortal), impermanent, permanent(mortal body) and may include "Harmony powers.)
6a/5b. Purge(The Mane 6 are forcibly ejected from the EoH after usage, and are no longer connected to them. OR they are ejected and [SEE 5a]. The purge may end their existence, if the author feels like writing some SAD.
marks.dk/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/slow-clap.gif
Update please!
1362897 1363207 Just to play devil's advocate here, I would think that dragons DO get the whole immortal sorrow thing going on, to an extent. The more intelligent among the species, such as Spike, stay connected to further generations of mortals or perhaps form groups amongst themselves, but eventually their memories are too much and they off themselves. For the lesser dragons who are primarily driven only by greed and more greed, undoubtedly they die via fighting for territory or more jewels or something. If neither of these things happened, after all, eventually Equestria would be totally overrun by a continually-increasing never-decreasing population of dragons. This is particularly true when you consider just how much the average adult dragon probably consumes.
1361884 Decidedly not, since in ITAV Spike's whole problem was the inability to stop himself from growing larger, whereas in this 'verse it seems he's managed to maintain his childhood size (if not stop his scales from growing thicker) for five hundred years.
All that said, G'AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!
ALL OF MY FEELS. I don't know how I wasn't watching you as an author, but I just got all caught up on the whole three chapters and it's COMPLETELY HEARTBREAKING for me the way Spike is reacting and how he still isn't sure if he's really hearing them or just bonkers and remembering what happened to them and all their friends and families.... You have an extreme gift for emotion and superbly crafted storytelling, determamfidd.
Why are my eyes wet? Huh. Must be humid in here.
Wow. Dude, you are amazing at writing the feels.
And to the whole immortality thing, I believe that if someone ever gave R2D2 a more maneuverable body ( I don't know, actually be taller than your hip and have longer arms?) He would be...something important. When you think about it, as long as he has the memory space and no one offs him, R2 is practically immortal, and he doesn't seem to have any problems with it. He could learn sharpshooting, magic tricks for sleight of hand weapon throwing, etc.
Robots is master race.
2815101 R2 is awesome.
Goldenrod too.