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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Well written, creative use of gaps within context, and interesting implantation of frost and sombra.
I just skipped the smut.
9343207
It's not important anyway...
The sleeper has awoken
Angry for the loss of the false life
Enraged for being manipulated
Sleep under the ice once more, foolish 'king', for you face a slayer of gods
Well, that came out of left fuckin' field. I'm sorry, but I'm gonna skip reading a 13 year old fantasizing getting dicked hardcore. What a weird fucking thing to do. For a story about found family, PTSD, and dealing with trauma from being a child soldier going to a 3-4 chapter long side-quest that ends with a very detailed and frankly concerning sexual fantasy. Concerning as in it was entirely unnecessary and didn't play into the themes of the story at all. It's pretty obvious why it was in there, and that's what is actually concerning.
Justify it all you want, it was gross. 99% of this story Raven was and acted like a child, and I'm getting the feeling that's exactly what she's going to be afterward too.
Well. . . That was fucked up. Psychological torment of the worst kind, living a full, normal life with a loving partner and child, only to be ripped away from it, being told it was never real. I'm hoping that causes some more long-term trauma for her, (as horrible as that is to say) because you can't just get away clean from that.
I skipped over the sex, that's just. . It's not what I'm here for. But this line nearly makes up for it.
"What is a King to a God!"
Despite the fact that he is "Colder and deadlier than space itself." He's one of the weaker frames from a lore standpoint. But a weak god is still a god, and the power of the Warframes can put the power of gods from other stories to shame. And considering He's literally in his element, there's nothing on that planet that can do serious harm.
10919015
I have since changed the chapter. It was a poorly done experiment under questionable circumstances and context in relations to this story. I did want to push the boundaries of a lot of things in this universe. Clearly I pushed to far.
My apologies.
11275724
I have now changed the chapter. I'm pushing the boundaries of many things, such as the psychological torment. Along with how dark this universe is. But it was evident I pushed a little to far in regards to this chapter.
My apologies.