After catching Spitfire having an affair with another stallion, Soarin searches for another mare to dull his pain. Meanwhile, Spitfire struggles with her guilt and tries to make amends by any means possible.
7829488 I just want you to know that I just got done reading each of the five chapters that you have posted about this story and it has fully inspired me to write my own Vinyl and Octavia story. I look very much forward to reading more wonderful chapters on this story and more of your work. I also look forward to seeing what else you come up with for such wonderful characters. Keep up the good work and always reach for the stars. This has been a wonderful story and truly is one of the best stories out there.
Hi there, sorry to bother you, but just thought you ought to know - I just saw this story listed on the main page, and your short description doesn't actually mention who the lead character is, it just says 'he.' Wondered if it might be better to change it to his name, as you're not at the 250 character limit for the short description, might possibly make it a bit clearer?
After catching Spitfire having an affair with another stallion, he searches for another mare to dull his pain. Meanwhile, Spitfire struggles with her guilt and tries to make amends by any means possible.
7843033 Huh... That's odd, idk why I left that part out. Thanks! 7843024 7843809 Thankya! I do my best 7844321 of course! Feedback is always welcome, whether it be positive or constructive
Okay, I'm really strapped for time right now, so I'll just tell you what really must be said.
1. I really like this story. It's a very well-done, realistic, adult take on well, adult relationships. This is the story that many romance and clop writers try and fail to make. 2. This story really earns the mature rating, and not just for a bit of swearing and screwing, but for actually involving mature situations and themes. This is an adult story that actually demands an adult audience to get the most out of it. 3. I like the relationship between Soarin and Spitfire. They're essentially as close as two people can be to best friends with sexual tension in a chain of command setting. Keep it that way. 4. You really could utilize Rainbow Dash more. I mean, she's a great friend of Spitfire and Soarin. And after your teasing with her and Spitfire being bisexual... 6. Dashie should have come along with Spitfire to speak with Soarin. 7. The callsign reveal excuse is flimsy as fuck. All callsigns are in some way insulting or derogatory -- it's a sign of friendship and respect you can be that casual with each other. 8. As a military officer, Spitfire has no reason to be threatened by her callsign -- she hardly interracts with civvies and her underlings under chain of command can't just call her by it. 9. i like that you're avoiding building a big harem for Soarin in favor of focusing on one actually strong and compelling relationship that feels real instead of forcing Soarin to g3t all teh mares bcuz he 1z th3 sXXXy. 10. Vinyl Scratch was just furious with Spitfire and now she wants to fuck her? Please, no, don't do this, especially if it involves a threesome with Soarin; Spitfire having sex with Soarin not only doesn't really add anything, but it also undermines the admirable message about strong friendship and the validity of platonic affection with no romantic or carnal component. 11. Octy's going to waste in this fic, but I hear she and Dashie are currently single and into mares... 12. Can we get a scene of Dashie, Soarin, and Spitfire making it painfully clear to the blackmailer why he should keep his mouth shut, including threats to press charges? 13. The sex is hot, if not the most realistic. 14. Don't forget that these characters are professionals with standards and rules operating in a rigid chain of command -- they're military personnel -- they can't just forget that and ignore the rules!
So there you go. Please think of what I said. Rest assured I'll read the next chapter and will give you an earful.
7845909 well I can't entirely say I agree with everything you said, but the feedback is always welcome regardless if you want some detailed answers as to why I wrote certain parts certain ways, feel free to PM me and I'll do my best to explain. Other than that, the fic isn't over yet so some of the points you made might or might not be resolved later on Thanks!
7847168 Yeah I really find clopfics with zero story to be really boring. I try to put at least some plot (huehuehue ) written in to keep things interesting. Thankya!
But, the development of character personality in such few chapters is incredible. I say stay your course on this, despite what others say or think, because this is a work of art in terms of depth of storyline.
I eagerly await the next installment, Mr Canadian.
Incoming threesome!
7829488 I just want you to know that I just got done reading each of the five chapters that you have posted about this story and it has fully inspired me to write my own Vinyl and Octavia story. I look very much forward to reading more wonderful chapters on this story and more of your work. I also look forward to seeing what else you come up with for such wonderful characters. Keep up the good work and always reach for the stars. This has been a wonderful story and truly is one of the best stories out there.
Hi there, sorry to bother you, but just thought you ought to know - I just saw this story listed on the main page, and your short description doesn't actually mention who the lead character is, it just says 'he.' Wondered if it might be better to change it to his name, as you're not at the 250 character limit for the short description, might possibly make it a bit clearer?
More soon?!
This just keeps getting and better. I think you and your fics have made me a vinyl scratch fan...you rock!
Very very nice. Want more feedback?
7843033 Huh... That's odd, idk why I left that part out. Thanks!
7843024
7843809 Thankya! I do my best
7844321 of course! Feedback is always welcome, whether it be positive or constructive
7844437
Okay, I'm really strapped for time right now, so I'll just tell you what really must be said.
1. I really like this story. It's a very well-done, realistic, adult take on well, adult relationships. This is the story that many romance and clop writers try and fail to make.
2. This story really earns the mature rating, and not just for a bit of swearing and screwing, but for actually involving mature situations and themes. This is an adult story that actually demands an adult audience to get the most out of it.
3. I like the relationship between Soarin and Spitfire. They're essentially as close as two people can be to best friends with sexual tension in a chain of command setting. Keep it that way.
4. You really could utilize Rainbow Dash more. I mean, she's a great friend of Spitfire and Soarin. And after your teasing with her and Spitfire being bisexual...
6. Dashie should have come along with Spitfire to speak with Soarin.
7. The callsign reveal excuse is flimsy as fuck. All callsigns are in some way insulting or derogatory -- it's a sign of friendship and respect you can be that casual with each other.
8. As a military officer, Spitfire has no reason to be threatened by her callsign -- she hardly interracts with civvies and her underlings under chain of command can't just call her by it.
9. i like that you're avoiding building a big harem for Soarin in favor of focusing on one actually strong and compelling relationship that feels real instead of forcing Soarin to g3t all teh mares bcuz he 1z th3 sXXXy.
10. Vinyl Scratch was just furious with Spitfire and now she wants to fuck her? Please, no, don't do this, especially if it involves a threesome with Soarin; Spitfire having sex with Soarin not only doesn't really add anything, but it also undermines the admirable message about strong friendship and the validity of platonic affection with no romantic or carnal component.
11. Octy's going to waste in this fic, but I hear she and Dashie are currently single and into mares...
12. Can we get a scene of Dashie, Soarin, and Spitfire making it painfully clear to the blackmailer why he should keep his mouth shut, including threats to press charges?
13. The sex is hot, if not the most realistic.
14. Don't forget that these characters are professionals with standards and rules operating in a rigid chain of command -- they're military personnel -- they can't just forget that and ignore the rules!
So there you go. Please think of what I said. Rest assured I'll read the next chapter and will give you an earful.
I love this story. Seriously, love it. Again and again. This chapter ending was absolutely perfect. I canNOT wait to read the next one!
7845909 well I can't entirely say I agree with everything you said, but the feedback is always welcome regardless if you want some detailed answers as to why I wrote certain parts certain ways, feel free to PM me and I'll do my best to explain. Other than that, the fic isn't over yet so some of the points you made might or might not be resolved later on Thanks!
There is a very small list of Anthro clopfics that have actually interesting storylines and don't just play out like pornos. This is on that list.
Really love your work with this one, so please keep it going.
Also, can we have that Soarin'xVinylxSpitfire clopscene next chapter please? The shit you write is gooood, my dude.
7847168 Yeah I really find clopfics with zero story to be really boring. I try to put at least some plot (huehuehue ) written in to keep things interesting. Thankya!
7846374
I'd rather do things in comment form because I believe in open discussion of stories between the writer and the readers, but I'll PM you.
7848203 Only because I dont want to spoil anything
7849948
Ah! PM you soon.
Welp... This took a weird turn...
But, the development of character personality in such few chapters is incredible. I say stay your course on this, despite what others say or think, because this is a work of art in terms of depth of storyline.
I eagerly await the next installment, Mr Canadian.
Well, now all the conflict is resolved in a 30 discussion and now there's going to be a threesome. GG, this fic.
7867126 Or is it?
awwww come on i want to see the threesome damnit
Well... Cant say i expected that.