Twilight Sparkle discovers that Sunset Shimmer still has some leftover emotional baggage from her past, and peels through Sunset's emotional walls to find out a really big secret.
I've already written the next chapter and there honestly isn't that much more to go. I just haven't posted it yet, in case there are additional details I want to add or change. One more chapter after that, I think, and then an epilogue. If you read the version where Twilight snaps at Sunset, please consider re-reading "Mistake" again, because I rethought the ending scene and have changed it.
EDIT: Holy cow, there's a new chapter of The Enchanted Library up. Stopping writing to read it. BBL.
Twilight is suddenly very insightful and rational; she feels like a mouthpiece for exposition. I feel this could have been handled better, but I can't express how.
reread the chapter and find it better. When i first read it, Twilight's reaction was too harsh and was more of s set up for Sunset to seemly try to kill herself from guilt and sorrow. that was the vibe i got the new ending is much better now. but I don;t see Sunset returning to her mother because hr mother..Stunk hard on being a mom, Sunset all grown up now, and after all she been thru. Why would she go back, i know it can be a happy ending somehow but I perfer this to be a bitter sweet ending. Celestia screwed up BIG TIME! There will be conquences that may never be healed.
Wow, this is really well done. Welcome to fimfiction btw I really like how this is done, though I don't think the cannon lines up with this properly in a timeline sense ( I think Sunset was already gone before Twilight became Celestia's student, though I could be wrong) but that doesn't really matter too much for me. What really strikes me about this is it finally painting Celestia in some other role than the perfect pony princess she's portrayed as in the show, I'm sure this isn't the first fic to do so but I don't often read ones which do so, and it really is refreshing. I liked the small look at Canterlot politics/social lives as well. I look forward to more stories from you in the future :)
When Celestia says she was watching Twilight and that Sunset was aware of her, she refers to the time before Twilight got her cutie mark and became her student. The biggest clue that Twilight would be the one was Shining Armor's cutie mark, long before Twilight got hers.
I don't actually remember that but it's been awhile since I've seen the movie so I very well could have just not remembered it... anyways, can't wait for more
This is in the fic, not the movie. Here's a timeline for the fic.
1. Sunset Shimmer officially becomes Celestia's student. 2. She gets her cutie mark and Celestia realizes that it is not her destiny to be the one to save Luna. 3. Celestia begins watching Twilight Sparkle and Starlight Glimmer. She realizes that Shining Armor has the Element of Magic as a cutie mark. She guesses that Twilight is the correct one. Celestia starts becoming very interested in Twilight (possibly sending Cadance to babysit her- I didn't write this in) 4. Sunset wonders why Celestia isn't paying as much attention to her. She finds out about Twilight and gets angry. 5. The events in The Fall of Sunset Shimmer happen. 6. Twilight takes the entrance exam for the School of Gifted Unicorns and hatches an unhatchable egg, getting her cutie mark in the process. This confirms to Celestia that she is the prophesied one. She becomes Celestia's student.
I did write this in explicitly in the story, but I get that it's not perfectly clear what order it happened.
This is one of the very best and most well written Sunset Shimmer stories that I have read yet. How ever I do feel that Celestia should have had her flank handed to her on a platter for asking Twilight to relay a message of pure remorse to Sunset. That is something that Twilight should have flat out refused to do because it should be Celestia and NOT twilight that goes to Sunset with that message. Still a very good and most well Written story. can't wait to see the next chapter.
Celestia keeps seeming to miss what she needs to do.
She needs to stop sitting around waiting for Sunset to return and go to her herself. Those two are never going to heal unless she takes the first steps. Sunset really isn't the one that needs to reach out first.
I can never decide how Twilight should be acting. Her giving Celestia a hard time seems both appropriate and wrong. If anything, you would think she'd manage to grasp that she too was subject to screwing things up, that her friends made a huge difference there, and that she (at least in canon) seems to require being pushed to the brink or given unasked for help to make it by. Lesson Zero was a major, major failure in it's own way and it's unlikely that it's Celestia's fault that Twilight presumably has a certain personality type, etc. She never even though to ask for clarification or to apologize that she was having trouble finding something to write about until she had a minor mental breakdown. Still, of all ponies, Twilight has the most business complaining of the three because her experience with Celestia was at least partly related to Celestia's personal issues and Celestia probably shouldn't have treated her as Sunset's replacement. I guess that means that Celestia has issues with personal/impersonal separation, at least in this story.
Also, like mother like daughter? Sunset is probably almost as bad as her mother.
6915372 I think at this point she has a justified fear of screwing up and never seeing Sunset again. You might as well say that Sunset really needs to actually confront her mother over the issue, especially now that understands it somewhat better.
Celestia's eyes fell, downcast. "I wish I could tell her how sorry I am. I still love her with all my heart, Twilight. I'd do anything to see her again. I would give up the Sun to have my Sunset back."
Twilight turned away, nodding slowly.
"I'll tell her you said that."
Presumably the same went for Luna... I'm not sure Celestia could give up the Sun even if she wanted too and, given her cutie mark, that might destroy her as a pony. It's sad that she, Celestia, seems only to be able to recognize certain kinds of errors in hindsight. Twilight ought to realize that the moment she was regarded as family that it was only a matter of time.
Oh, it was clear the order it happened, what I was saying was in the movie(s) it was never mentioned about Sunset knowing who Twilight was before going through the mirror. Doesn't really matter to me though
6916141 Somepony needs to confront somepony over this I agree. But Sunset also has a justified fear of not living up to Celestia's expectations, and that can easily color how she would view things going.
Also she does have a lifetime of neglect to overcome which, understandably, would make her bitter. So why should she be the one to go crawling back? At least, that's how she would see it.
“So you can imagine my pride when my divinations revealed that she was one of only three fillies whose destinies were close enough to align with Starswirl’s prophecy, and she was the oldest. I think that I let my hopes as a mother get the better of my judgement and immediately assumed that she would be the one. It seemed so perfect at the time, that my daughter would be destined to save her aunt and become an alicorn to join us…”
Pride cost her Luna and her own daughter? Too much pride has always seemed to be Celestia's weakness despite how benevolent she makes herself out to be. You know, I can actually see that.
7901353 A good point, but you try having millions, perhaps billions of people worship you as a god and not feel proud. She literally controls the sun. I know for a fact that I'd be proud as fuck if I could say that.
I like to think that it was the very natural pride and hope that a mother feels for her offspring, rather than the classic arrogance. But I also think that, as readers, you get to interpret the work however you like!
This really freaking hurts after this chapter. I mean, I’m not sure she could have been more hurtful. Literally any kind of personal attack would have been better, but to be told that so plainly by the mare your mother/idol replaced you with as well as your own personal savior has got to be completely devastating. ...and her response! My god! No tears or visible pain, just calm acceptance. I am actually tearing up thinking about it. THIS HURTS SO MUCH!!!
Before she could go, Princess Celestia stopped her. "Twilight, tell me please... does Sunset hate me?"
Gee comrade, I god damn wonder what the answer to that question will be? Celestia is by far in this fic the saddest excuse of a sister, wife, and mother I have seen. Literally imagine being replaced slowly in front of your own very eyes. Thats not just torture, thats psychological murder. This is one of the best Momlestia and Sunset fics on this site right now but I'm not gonna lie, Celestia is a miserable excuse of anything involving a family in this story. Sunset literally did nothing wrong in all of her life, it was Celestia that drove her down that path. This is only Celestia's fault, just like with Nightmare Moon and now with her own daughter. She doesnt deserve reconciliation or forgiveness. Hell, with the later chapters it'd be cool for Sunset to become an alicorn so Celestia can live with that failure for a long, long time.
10523154 Absolutely. If anything, Sunset becoming an alicorn should be proof that ponies’ destinies aren’t and shouldn’t be defined by prophecy. If Sunset ever were to become a princess in her own right, it would be unquestionable evidence of Celestia’s failures in her duties as a mother. Her pride and stubborn mentality destroyed her relationship with her own daughter, and it cost her and Luna a thousand years. I’d go as far as to say Celestia lost the right to her crown the moment she started neglecting her own flesh and blood. She had a thousand years to get her act together, and yet her resistance to change or letting go of her pride ends up hurting everyone around her while she gets off scot-fucking-free.
I'm super iffy about this chapter, like I do feel like everything was done good, but man, would twilight NOT say that, or in the very least how she said it. Like if it was starlight yeah Id totally see her talking back to Celestia, but twilight? No way. Even if she was disappointed in her to an intense degree, she would never verbally back hand the princess like she did here
Is the story already finished? Because I'd really hate it if, for some reason, you stop updating.
Of all the "Celestia is Sunset's mom" fics, this is, by far, the best.
Last chapter was kind of a letdown with how Twilight snapped at Sunset, but this chapter recoverd that by this very interesting backstory.
Kudos, my good author!
6914091
I've already written the next chapter and there honestly isn't that much more to go. I just haven't posted it yet, in case there are additional details I want to add or change. One more chapter after that, I think, and then an epilogue. If you read the version where Twilight snaps at Sunset, please consider re-reading "Mistake" again, because I rethought the ending scene and have changed it.
EDIT: Holy cow, there's a new chapter of The Enchanted Library up. Stopping writing to read it. BBL.
Twilight is suddenly very insightful and rational; she feels like a mouthpiece for exposition. I feel this could have been handled better, but I can't express how.
reread the chapter and find it better. When i first read it, Twilight's reaction was too harsh and was more of s set up for Sunset to seemly try to kill herself from guilt and sorrow.
that was the vibe i got the new ending is much better now.
but I don;t see Sunset returning to her mother because hr mother..Stunk hard on being a mom, Sunset all grown up now, and after all she been thru.
Why would she go back, i know it can be a happy ending somehow but I perfer this to be a bitter sweet ending. Celestia screwed up BIG TIME!
There will be conquences that may never be healed.
6914119 Mhm I read it and it's way better. I'm glad that you already have everything planned out. I'm looking forward to it!
This is possibly one of the best stories ever made.
Wow, this is really well done. Welcome to fimfiction btw I really like how this is done, though I don't think the cannon lines up with this properly in a timeline sense ( I think Sunset was already gone before Twilight became Celestia's student, though I could be wrong) but that doesn't really matter too much for me. What really strikes me about this is it finally painting Celestia in some other role than the perfect pony princess she's portrayed as in the show, I'm sure this isn't the first fic to do so but I don't often read ones which do so, and it really is refreshing. I liked the small look at Canterlot politics/social lives as well. I look forward to more stories from you in the future :)
6914460
When Celestia says she was watching Twilight and that Sunset was aware of her, she refers to the time before Twilight got her cutie mark and became her student. The biggest clue that Twilight would be the one was Shining Armor's cutie mark, long before Twilight got hers.
6914484
I don't actually remember that but it's been awhile since I've seen the movie so I very well could have just not remembered it... anyways, can't wait for more
6914500
This is in the fic, not the movie. Here's a timeline for the fic.
1. Sunset Shimmer officially becomes Celestia's student. 2. She gets her cutie mark and Celestia realizes that it is not her destiny to be the one to save Luna. 3. Celestia begins watching Twilight Sparkle and Starlight Glimmer. She realizes that Shining Armor has the Element of Magic as a cutie mark. She guesses that Twilight is the correct one. Celestia starts becoming very interested in Twilight (possibly sending Cadance to babysit her- I didn't write this in) 4. Sunset wonders why Celestia isn't paying as much attention to her. She finds out about Twilight and gets angry. 5. The events in The Fall of Sunset Shimmer happen. 6. Twilight takes the entrance exam for the School of Gifted Unicorns and hatches an unhatchable egg, getting her cutie mark in the process. This confirms to Celestia that she is the prophesied one. She becomes Celestia's student.
I did write this in explicitly in the story, but I get that it's not perfectly clear what order it happened.
This is one of the very best and most well written Sunset Shimmer stories that I have read yet. How ever I do feel that Celestia should have had her flank handed to her on a platter for asking Twilight to relay a message of pure remorse to Sunset. That is something that Twilight should have flat out refused to do because it should be Celestia and NOT twilight that goes to Sunset with that message. Still a very good and most well Written story. can't wait to see the next chapter.
I need more.
6914623
You... are right, actually. Celestia may have her faults, but I don't think she'd actually ask Twilight to do that. I've changed the phrasing a bit.
6914756 why is it every time I fined a great story I end up reading through it in one go instead of breaking it up into smaller bites to make it last?
Celestia keeps seeming to miss what she needs to do.
She needs to stop sitting around waiting for Sunset to return and go to her herself. Those two are never going to heal unless she takes the first steps. Sunset really isn't the one that needs to reach out first.
"And the award for Mom of the millennia goes to!"
Drum roll
Princess Celestia!
Wild booing
This chapter reminds me of a part in Lullaby for a Princess:
And that foolish pony did nothing to stop
The destruction of one who had needed her most
I can never decide how Twilight should be acting. Her giving Celestia a hard time seems both appropriate and wrong. If anything, you would think she'd manage to grasp that she too was subject to screwing things up, that her friends made a huge difference there, and that she (at least in canon) seems to require being pushed to the brink or given unasked for help to make it by. Lesson Zero was a major, major failure in it's own way and it's unlikely that it's Celestia's fault that Twilight presumably has a certain personality type, etc. She never even though to ask for clarification or to apologize that she was having trouble finding something to write about until she had a minor mental breakdown. Still, of all ponies, Twilight has the most business complaining of the three because her experience with Celestia was at least partly related to Celestia's personal issues and Celestia probably shouldn't have treated her as Sunset's replacement. I guess that means that Celestia has issues with personal/impersonal separation, at least in this story.
Also, like mother like daughter? Sunset is probably almost as bad as her mother.
6915372
I think at this point she has a justified fear of screwing up and never seeing Sunset again. You might as well say that Sunset really needs
to actually confront her mother over the issue, especially now that understands it somewhat better.
6914756
Presumably the same went for Luna... I'm not sure Celestia could give up the Sun even if she wanted too and, given her cutie mark,
that might destroy her as a pony. It's sad that she, Celestia, seems only to be able to recognize certain kinds of errors in hindsight. Twilight ought to realize that the moment she was regarded as family that it was only a matter of time.
6914591
Oh, it was clear the order it happened, what I was saying was in the movie(s) it was never mentioned about Sunset knowing who Twilight was before going through the mirror. Doesn't really matter to me though
6915806 don't! Don't say that! No 'parent of the year/Millenia award's!
have you seen game of thrones?
6916141 Somepony needs to confront somepony over this I agree. But Sunset also has a justified fear of not living up to Celestia's expectations, and that can easily color how she would view things going.
Also she does have a lifetime of neglect to overcome which, understandably, would make her bitter. So why should she be the one to go crawling back? At least, that's how she would see it.
you to
it was
7291157
Corrected also. Thanks!
7291201
“So you can imagine my pride when my divinations revealed that she was one of only three fillies whose destinies were close enough to align with Starswirl’s prophecy, and she was the oldest. I think that I let my hopes as a mother get the better of my judgement and immediately assumed that she would be the one. It seemed so perfect at the time, that my daughter would be destined to save her aunt and become an alicorn to join us…”
Pride cost her Luna and her own daughter? Too much pride has always seemed to be Celestia's weakness despite how benevolent she makes herself out to be. You know, I can actually see that.
7901353 A good point, but you try having millions, perhaps billions of people worship you as a god and not feel proud. She literally controls the sun. I know for a fact that I'd be proud as fuck if I could say that.
8034243
7901353
I like to think that it was the very natural pride and hope that a mother feels for her offspring, rather than the classic arrogance. But I also think that, as readers, you get to interpret the work however you like!
Whatever the royal family's therapist is getting paid it's not enough
Celestia! get off your flank and go through that portal, It's not Sunsets job to come to you.
This really freaking hurts after this chapter. I mean, I’m not sure she could have been more hurtful. Literally any kind of personal attack would have been better, but to be told that so plainly by the mare your mother/idol replaced you with as well as your own personal savior has got to be completely devastating.
...and her response! My god! No tears or visible pain, just calm acceptance. I am actually tearing up thinking about it.
THIS HURTS SO MUCH!!!
Second time reading this book in still the only thing I can say to this chapter is another ouch and damn Twilight was not pulling any punches
Gee comrade, I god damn wonder what the answer to that question will be? Celestia is by far in this fic the saddest excuse of a sister, wife, and mother I have seen. Literally imagine being replaced slowly in front of your own very eyes. Thats not just torture, thats psychological murder. This is one of the best Momlestia and Sunset fics on this site right now but I'm not gonna lie, Celestia is a miserable excuse of anything involving a family in this story. Sunset literally did nothing wrong in all of her life, it was Celestia that drove her down that path. This is only Celestia's fault, just like with Nightmare Moon and now with her own daughter. She doesnt deserve reconciliation or forgiveness. Hell, with the later chapters it'd be cool for Sunset to become an alicorn so Celestia can live with that failure for a long, long time.
Yes. As she should.
8510120
Lmao truee
10523154
Absolutely. If anything, Sunset becoming an alicorn should be proof that ponies’ destinies aren’t and shouldn’t be defined by prophecy.
If Sunset ever were to become a princess in her own right, it would be unquestionable evidence of Celestia’s failures in her duties as a mother. Her pride and stubborn mentality destroyed her relationship with her own daughter, and it cost her and Luna a thousand years. I’d go as far as to say Celestia lost the right to her crown the moment she started neglecting her own flesh and blood.
She had a thousand years to get her act together, and yet her resistance to change or letting go of her pride ends up hurting everyone around her while she gets off scot-fucking-free.
9014107
To paraphrase Uncle Phil:
She’s not supposed to be there for you! You’re supposed to be there for HER!
I'm super iffy about this chapter, like I do feel like everything was done good, but man, would twilight NOT say that, or in the very least how she said it. Like if it was starlight yeah Id totally see her talking back to Celestia, but twilight? No way. Even if she was disappointed in her to an intense degree, she would never verbally back hand the princess like she did here